Latest / The Trauma Therapist / Mental Heatlh Challenges and Business with Dr. Laura Shwaluk and Jerry Kezhaya

Transcript

Mental Heatlh Challenges and Business with Dr. Laura Shwaluk and Jerry Kezhaya · The Trauma Therapist

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Trauma Therapists Podcast. My name is Gamiferson.
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: I interview incredible people who've dedicated their lives to helping
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: those who've been impacted by trauma. A big thank you
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: to our sponsors and our guests who are supporting this
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: show five four, three, two and one, Our folks, welcome
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: back to the podcast. Very excited to have my guest today,
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: doctor Laura Schwalak and Jerry Kaziah. Laura, Jerry, welcome.
• 0:26
  Speaker 2: Welcome, Thank you so much. We're so happy to be here.
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: I here to appreciate that. Yeah.
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: So, doctor Schwalak and Jerry Kaziah are the husband and
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: wife duel behind BBMMA Business Builders Mentor and Mastermind coaching
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: and mentorship network built from their entrepreneurial journey across multiple industries. Today,
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: we're going to be exploring the emotional strain that trauma
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: and mental health challenges can bring to running a business,
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: then offer practical strategies to support growth and well being.
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: Their success traces back to owning six profitable businesses from
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: auto repair and car wash, to retail, health and fitness,
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: real estate, and even wine venture. Damn, it's got it
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: going on all right.
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: We have had some fun. I promise you that. Geez,
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: it's been an amazing journey. Guy.
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: All right, look before you going share with the listeners
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: where you're from originally and where you are currently, and
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: we'll dive in.
• 1:22
  Speaker 3: I'm originally from Manitoba, Canada and came to Texas in
• 1:28
  Speaker 3: nineteen ninety three.
• 1:31
  Speaker 2: Okay, Jerry, I'm originally from Michigan and I got here
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: in August of nineteen eighty with all of eleven hundred
• 1:40
  Speaker 2: dollars and a rusted out old car in a toolbox.
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: That's enter country guitar sounds right.
• 1:48
  Speaker 3: Oh my god, I got your and a bicycle and
• 1:52
  Speaker 3: some clothes and it's like, okay, I gotta make this work.
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: All right.
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: So let's given given the the topic of this podcast,
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: and we're going to segue into what exactly you do
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: the business you do, but how what gives you the
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: authority and the experience to talk about trauma and mental
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: health issues with regards to creating a business. Because we
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: have obviously a lot of therapists to listen to as coaches,
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: people who are starting their own business in their own business,
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: so this is applicable.
• 2:34
  Speaker 2: So obviously, well not obviously to your viewers. They don't
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: know us yet. My wife ran her own clinic for
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: over twenty years.
• 2:44
  Speaker 3: What kind of clinic functional indochronology. Oh okay, okay, yeah,
• 2:49
  Speaker 3: that's my doctor. It isn't chiropractic. And I went really
• 2:52
  Speaker 3: deep into the organs and glands and how to naturally help.
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: Someone I grew up in. I mean, I can just
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: talk about my own trauma that I've been Yeah.
• 3:03
  Speaker 3: We've each had our own trauma.
• 3:07
  Speaker 4: You talk about yours firston.
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: Okay, thanks and fun whatever you know. I mean, after
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: almost thirty years together, I was like, okay, whatever, she's
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: my boss. I'm good. But you know, growing up in
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: the deepest, darkest parts of Detroit, having trauma is a
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: normal thing, you know, watching people get shot and killed
• 3:31
  Speaker 2: right in front of you at the age of eight
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: and nine and ten. You have lots of trauma. And
• 3:38
  Speaker 2: so it took us. It took me until twenty eighteen
• 3:46
  Speaker 2: before I first heard that there were ways to deal
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: with it, and then twenty nineteen before I actually took
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: care of it started the process of my healing. It
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: was really interesting, guy. I found that the more successful
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: I became, the angrier I became, the less social I
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: was becoming the more reserved and guarded I was, and
• 4:09
  Speaker 2: I just I knew in my heart. I said that
• 4:11
  Speaker 2: this isn't right. You know, when you when you take
• 4:15
  Speaker 2: eleven hundred dollars and turn it into tens of millions,
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: you're supposed to be You're supposed to be happy. Right,
• 4:23
  Speaker 2: The term fat and happy should have been me. I
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: was up to three hundred and twenty pounds and I
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: was fat and freaking miserable, and I couldn't understand why
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: until I was in a business meeting in Arizona and
• 4:36
  Speaker 2: a gentleman stood up and talked about MDMA therapy for PTSD.
• 4:42
  Speaker 2: And I will tell you in the first ten seconds,
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: I went from listening to crazy, angry, upset, mad, What
• 4:54
  Speaker 2: is this jerk doing talking about drugs in a freaking
• 4:58
  Speaker 2: business meeting of fifty men, men and women? And I
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: really became angry. And then it was the craziest experience
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: of my life. I got tunnel vision and all I
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: could see was this guy, and all I could hear
• 5:15
  Speaker 2: was that man. And he talked on for probably twenty
• 5:18
  Speaker 2: maybe thirty minutes, and it was like God, who told me,
• 5:22
  Speaker 2: you need to listen to this? And I mean, there's
• 5:26
  Speaker 2: no other explanation I can come up with other than
• 5:29
  Speaker 2: it was divine intervention. Right. I've never used drugs. I
• 5:33
  Speaker 2: never smoked marijuana. I didn't like I could k I
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: could tell you all a lot about good whiskey, and
• 5:39
  Speaker 2: I could tell you a bit about wine. I mean,
• 5:42
  Speaker 2: actually became a summoier as a hobby. But when you
• 5:46
  Speaker 2: start talking stuff that's illegal, I went off the rails.
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: Oh my god. So hang on one second, Jerry. So
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: you're sitting there in this meeting, was there any awareness
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: or an understanding that something was wrong, that you had
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: been traumatized, or was there a feeling or what?
• 6:14
  Speaker 2: Guy, I could just share it with you like this.
• 6:16
  Speaker 2: I knew that I had been traumatized. I knew that
• 6:20
  Speaker 2: my early life was a real S show. I don't
• 6:24
  Speaker 2: know what's applicled one to say here, but it was
• 6:27
  Speaker 2: a horrible, horrible experience. My mother was a vicious, mean
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: drunk who took out her frustrations on me starting at
• 6:35
  Speaker 2: eighteen months old, and I was constantly beat and traumatized
• 6:40
  Speaker 2: by my mother. My dad was a workaholic, great guy,
• 6:44
  Speaker 2: just he wasn't there for me emotionally. I had an
• 6:47
  Speaker 2: uncle that sexually abused me when I was four and
• 6:49
  Speaker 2: a half years old. I've been through all kinds of
• 6:53
  Speaker 2: talk therapy, I mean, hundreds of hours, tens of thousands
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: of dollars, and I thought, you know, I already dealt
• 7:01
  Speaker 2: with all that crap. I dealt with it. What is this?
• 7:05
  Speaker 2: Why am I so angry? I just knew. I knew
• 7:07
  Speaker 2: in my heart that I shouldn't be angry. I should
• 7:11
  Speaker 2: be I mean, you know, once you surpassed twenty million dollars,
• 7:14
  Speaker 2: you should have like no worries in the world. Dude, really,
• 7:19
  Speaker 2: and I to believe. I was, yeah, right, You're led
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: to believe. And I found out that I became a
• 7:24
  Speaker 2: functional alcoholic. I was self medicating with food and alcohol.
• 7:31
  Speaker 2: I got up to over three hundred and twenty pounds
• 7:34
  Speaker 2: and I'm pushing two thirty right now. So when you
• 7:39
  Speaker 2: get rid of your demons, all that other stuff just
• 7:41
  Speaker 2: seems to fall away. It's a beautiful experience. In my case,
• 7:46
  Speaker 2: I learned. It took me eighteen months to learn everything
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: that I could about MDMA, and because it's still illegal
• 7:54
  Speaker 2: in the United States, I had to hire an underground
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: md to sit with me. Because a year and a
• 8:02
  Speaker 2: half earlier, I was in the ICU and I almost died.
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: I came out with stage two of heart failure and
• 8:08
  Speaker 2: only fifty percent of the use of my lungs, so
• 8:11
  Speaker 2: my body was broken. It was telling me, dude, you're
• 8:14
  Speaker 2: doing this game wrong, the game of life. You're doing
• 8:16
  Speaker 2: it wrong. And so in that meeting when I got
• 8:21
  Speaker 2: tunnel vision, It's like, well, maybe there's maybe God's trying
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: to talk to me, and this is the lesson I
• 8:28
  Speaker 2: need to learn about. So I literally spent eighteen months
• 8:31
  Speaker 2: learning as much as I could about the chemical, what
• 8:35
  Speaker 2: it does, how it functions, where it was made, who
• 8:38
  Speaker 2: created it, why it was created. I learned all about
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: Sasha Shulgan and you know, I mean just the MAPS program,
• 8:47
  Speaker 2: which is the Multiple Disciplinary Association for Psychedelic Studies. You know,
• 8:51
  Speaker 2: I mean, I literally spent eighteen months learning everything I could.
• 8:54
  Speaker 2: When I go into something, my wife will verify this.
• 8:57
  Speaker 2: When I go in, I going off the deep end
• 8:59
  Speaker 2: and I go head first, right, It's just what I do.
• 9:03
  Speaker 2: And when I finally had my session August nineteen of
• 9:12
  Speaker 2: twenty nineteen, the change that happened with me was so
• 9:21
  Speaker 2: profound that we hired the same MD and she and
• 9:25
  Speaker 2: the doctor sat with my wife seven days later the
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: following week. The following the following week, Laura had her
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: first experience with it. And oh my god, it's like
• 9:36
  Speaker 2: people that know us now, when I tell them that
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: I was angry, they shake their head and go, not
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: the Jerry I know, right, that's that's not even possible
• 9:46
  Speaker 2: whole me to describe the difference.
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, well, I want to hear from you, Laura too.
• 9:52
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 9:52
  Speaker 3: So I'm just going to describe the difference just to
• 9:55
  Speaker 3: complete the train of thought, and then I'll share a
• 9:57
  Speaker 3: little bout my own trauma. Before Jerry did the MDMA
• 10:02
  Speaker 3: therapy for PTSD, it was like anger was a way
• 10:06
  Speaker 3: of life.
• 10:07
  Speaker 4: It was like a suit of armor, but a.
• 10:10
  Speaker 3: Suit of armor covered with porky pine quills, and those
• 10:13
  Speaker 3: quills were always sticking out, ready to fire off. And
• 10:17
  Speaker 3: it didn't matter who it was, where he was, he'd
• 10:20
  Speaker 3: be laughing, and then the next minute he'd be yelling
• 10:23
  Speaker 3: at someone and just redd in the face angry, and
• 10:27
  Speaker 3: I'm like, what is going on?
• 10:29
  Speaker 4: This is not healthy, this is not right.
• 10:31
  Speaker 3: And I had known him for so many years of
• 10:35
  Speaker 3: being angry this way, and then when he said I
• 10:39
  Speaker 3: want to do this therapy for PTSD.
• 10:42
  Speaker 4: And I was like, yeah, that's okay.
• 10:45
  Speaker 3: I had never done any kind of drugs at all.
• 10:48
  Speaker 4: Just alcohol was it. And I was like concerned.
• 10:53
  Speaker 3: I was like, okay, so always hire somebody that's going
• 10:56
  Speaker 3: to do this, make sure that you're all right, and
• 10:59
  Speaker 3: give you the right amount and the right su off
• 11:01
  Speaker 3: nothing that's going to be contaminated with something else.
• 11:04
  Speaker 2: Yep.
• 11:05
  Speaker 4: And he came.
• 11:07
  Speaker 3: Out like the next day and it was like that
• 11:11
  Speaker 3: occupying suit was gone.
• 11:14
  Speaker 2: Wow. And the transformation was so profound. I mean, doctor Jekyline,
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: mister Hyde is the closest analogy that I can give
• 11:23
  Speaker 2: you of.
• 11:24
  Speaker 3: What he used to be like. And now it's like
• 11:26
  Speaker 3: this love. It's like that's the man I knew was
• 11:30
  Speaker 3: in there.
• 11:31
  Speaker 4: Oh my god, I knew he was in there. I
• 11:34
  Speaker 4: just didn't know how to reach him. I didn't know how.
• 11:36
  Speaker 1: To Meanwhile, you're running a business.
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: Was at the time we were running eight companies.
• 11:40
  Speaker 4: We had eight companies.
• 11:41
  Speaker 2: We had eight companies going simultaneously, several hundred employees, multi
• 11:45
  Speaker 2: million dollar payrolls, and we were still traveling one hundred
• 11:48
  Speaker 2: and thirty days a year. We were traveling the world.
• 11:50
  Speaker 3: And that's what qualifies us to coach other business owners,
• 11:54
  Speaker 3: particularly in the service based business, is because we've done
• 11:57
  Speaker 3: it for.
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: Right, well, January will be forty five years. I've owned
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: the company that our biggest company that we have today.
• 12:04
  Speaker 4: Which is the auto repair shop. Yeah.
• 12:07
  Speaker 2: Wow, Yeah.
• 12:08
  Speaker 3: And then I saw what a transformation it was for him.
• 12:12
  Speaker 3: I was like, I gotta do this. And I'll be honest,
• 12:15
  Speaker 3: I was concerned. I was nervous because I didn't know
• 12:17
  Speaker 3: what I was going to feel like.
• 12:18
  Speaker 4: I didn't know.
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah, all the did I did the.
• 12:23
  Speaker 4: Propaganda of what is going to happen?
• 12:26
  Speaker 3: Am I going to feel like I want to fly
• 12:28
  Speaker 3: and jump off of a balcony? Am I gonna, you know,
• 12:31
  Speaker 3: do something stupid? I had no idea I was.
• 12:34
  Speaker 1: So I was like, okay, yeah, I'd have those same concerns.
• 12:37
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 12:38
  Speaker 3: And because for me, I grew up in uh a
• 12:43
  Speaker 3: very I would say neglected household. My mother died shortly
• 12:47
  Speaker 3: after I turned six and the youngest one of eight kids.
• 12:51
  Speaker 4: My father had a nervous breakdown, and the kid we
• 12:53
  Speaker 4: were basically left to our own devices. I mean, and
• 12:57
  Speaker 4: we see this in a lot of young people today.
• 12:59
  Speaker 3: Both parents were the kids are left to fend for themselves.
• 13:04
  Speaker 3: And for an entrepreneur who's left to fend for themselves,
• 13:09
  Speaker 3: they don't realize that, you know what, there are groups
• 13:12
  Speaker 3: that are and mentors there who can help you.
• 13:15
  Speaker 4: You don't have to make the same mistakes that we did.
• 13:18
  Speaker 4: You don't have to live alone.
• 13:20
  Speaker 3: That's one of the biggest things that we come across
• 13:23
  Speaker 3: is our business owners.
• 13:26
  Speaker 4: They feel alone.
• 13:27
  Speaker 3: They feel like it's only them, not necessarily that they
• 13:30
  Speaker 3: feel lonely, but they can be in a room full
• 13:33
  Speaker 3: of people and still feel lonely because they don't have
• 13:36
  Speaker 3: someone else to talk to about their business. They don't
• 13:39
  Speaker 3: have they can't talk to it about their business, to
• 13:41
  Speaker 3: their employees, and their spouse may not understand what they're
• 13:46
  Speaker 3: going through. And so there's that kind of trauma, the
• 13:50
  Speaker 3: trauma of just simply feeling like you're alone. And so
• 13:54
  Speaker 3: when I did my first session, it was as though
• 14:00
  Speaker 3: a mantle of fear was lifted off of me. I
• 14:03
  Speaker 3: had such fear. I had such fear around men. I
• 14:07
  Speaker 3: had a lot of fear around men, and not sexual abuse,
• 14:13
  Speaker 3: but just kind of older brothers. They beat up on
• 14:18
  Speaker 3: their other older brothers, and they sometimes think that their
• 14:21
  Speaker 3: younger sisters.
• 14:22
  Speaker 4: Can handle that and it's not appropriate. So just the
• 14:29
  Speaker 4: level of fear.
• 14:30
  Speaker 3: That shifted off of me, and what happened was our
• 14:34
  Speaker 3: relationship changed because when he was angry, that would make
• 14:38
  Speaker 3: me feel fearful and shut down, and then I'd be
• 14:40
  Speaker 3: fearful and then I wouldn't respond to him the way
• 14:44
  Speaker 3: he And so there was this back and forth of
• 14:46
  Speaker 3: this downward spiral, and we were not communicating, and it
• 14:51
  Speaker 3: was like, Okay, we need.
• 14:53
  Speaker 4: To do something different because what we're doing is they're working.
• 14:56
  Speaker 3: We would take a course and that would help, or
• 14:59
  Speaker 3: we talked to someone and that would help temporarily, but
• 15:01
  Speaker 3: it wasn't permanent.
• 15:02
  Speaker 2: We weren't fixing the root. We never got to the root.
• 15:07
  Speaker 2: And and you know, you look, you're only dealing with
• 15:09
  Speaker 2: the you know, the the symptoms, not the causal factor. Right.
• 15:14
  Speaker 2: You have to you know, you have to, you really
• 15:17
  Speaker 2: have to root out what the hell happened. And and
• 15:22
  Speaker 2: it's some you know, it's it's always something in your.
• 15:25
  Speaker 3: Past, and it's in your subconscious mind like so much
• 15:28
  Speaker 3: we're not even aware of it.
• 15:29
  Speaker 4: Jared didn't even realize that he sounded angry.
• 15:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah, she can ask me, are you angry?
• 15:35
  Speaker 3: Are you You're.
• 15:38
  Speaker 2: Telling a joke and you sound like you're pissed off?
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: I mean, how does that work?
• 15:43
  Speaker 1: Right? All right, hang on a second, let me let
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: me just uh this is I really appreciate you both
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: sharing your stories. My god, I just want to remind
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: everyone in Suping with doctor Laura Schwalak and Jerry Keziah.
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: So as we kind of moving to the next segment
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: of this, so what do you guys do right now
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: in terms of your your business you'd like to share
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: with us? And then I want to uh ask you
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: a different question, but right now, what would you what
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: do you want to share with our listeners? What do
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: you do?
• 16:18
  Speaker 2: We help business owners to become the business owner that
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: they dreamt they would be.
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: Any business owner.
• 16:32
  Speaker 2: Mostly, yeah, we worked. We work across most industries. There's
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: something we don't work with. I don't do a lot
• 16:39
  Speaker 2: of retail work. We don't do a lot of retail
• 16:41
  Speaker 2: work because it's just it's not my wheelhouse.
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: We don't entrepreneurs like myself, Okay, entrepreneurs.
• 16:49
  Speaker 3: We like the people who have employees, people who have
• 16:52
  Speaker 3: been in business for a while. They provide a service,
• 16:54
  Speaker 3: they provide a product.
• 16:58
  Speaker 4: And they would like to.
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: Do is.
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: I'm sorry. We don't coaches.
• 17:03
  Speaker 4: We don't really coach coaches.
• 17:05
  Speaker 3: We coach people who have businesses and employees, although I
• 17:10
  Speaker 3: haven't really been asked by coaches to coach. Usually it's
• 17:14
  Speaker 3: like the pest control company, the attorney, the.
• 17:18
  Speaker 2: Business truck who wants to have more than one truck
• 17:26
  Speaker 2: on the road.
• 17:27
  Speaker 3: They want to create a business that they gives them freedom.
• 17:33
  Speaker 3: They sometimes they feel like they're stuck in their business
• 17:35
  Speaker 3: or they're stuck owing the bank, and they want their freedom.
• 17:39
  Speaker 3: They want to have money, they want to have freedom.
• 17:42
  Speaker 3: They want to create a legacy. And that legacy may
• 17:44
  Speaker 3: be their company, it may be whatever they leave to
• 17:47
  Speaker 3: their children, or it may be something for their community
• 17:50
  Speaker 3: or something for the world. It's like, you know, this
• 17:52
  Speaker 3: is what I'm passionate about regarding what I want to see,
• 17:56
  Speaker 3: the change I want to see in the world.
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: And we do a three day event in the end
• 18:01
  Speaker 2: of March every year. It's called Money, Freedom Legacy, and
• 18:04
  Speaker 2: we teach people. Nobody teaches money today. I mean very
• 18:07
  Speaker 2: few people teach money. There's a couple folks out there
• 18:09
  Speaker 2: doing it, but very few people teach money, and so
• 18:13
  Speaker 2: most people in my opinion, are doing money totally wrong.
• 18:17
  Speaker 2: And that's why eighty five percent of Americans age sixty
• 18:20
  Speaker 2: five or older cannot put their hands on twenty five
• 18:24
  Speaker 2: thousand dollars and twenty five grand is not going to
• 18:26
  Speaker 2: get you far in retirement. Right, So how do we
• 18:29
  Speaker 2: get you back into the growth mode of your finances
• 18:33
  Speaker 2: and get you out of the bank's crosshairs? Right? We
• 18:37
  Speaker 2: had dinner with a friend the other night. He goes,
• 18:39
  Speaker 2: you know, it's really frustrating when I need money, the
• 18:43
  Speaker 2: banks won't give me money. When I don't need money,
• 18:46
  Speaker 2: they fall all over themselves trying to get me back
• 18:49
  Speaker 2: into debt. And this is really a problem that many
• 18:53
  Speaker 2: entrepreneurs struggle with, is how do they deal with the
• 18:57
  Speaker 2: financial landscape that we have today? And we teach that
• 19:02
  Speaker 2: quite effectively. Every one of our clients, every one of
• 19:05
  Speaker 2: our clients has tenexed their business by cutting and by
• 19:09
  Speaker 2: cutting the workload at least in half.
• 19:11
  Speaker 3: And I want to be very kind of paint the
• 19:15
  Speaker 3: picture is we have a very small group. Our meeting
• 19:18
  Speaker 3: in March is only thirty people. That's it, because it's
• 19:23
  Speaker 3: more like a family, it's more like support.
• 19:26
  Speaker 4: And then our.
• 19:27
  Speaker 3: Mastermind we only accept twelve twelve men each year. It's
• 19:33
  Speaker 3: like an inch wide and a mile deep, because it's
• 19:37
  Speaker 3: really how do we help you to be your absolute best?
• 19:41
  Speaker 3: And it's including different things that happen in a man's life,
• 19:47
  Speaker 3: and we really only work with men and their and
• 19:49
  Speaker 3: their wives. The women usually come in four times a year, and.
• 19:55
  Speaker 2: Because it's important that they're on the same sheet of
• 19:57
  Speaker 2: music as the husband, particularly guarding money.
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, let me let me ask you something. So when
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: before you did the you had your experience with MDMA,
• 20:10
  Speaker 1: both of you, I mean it sounds like to some
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: degree you or some definition you were successful. Oh, something
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: was business wise, something was happening business.
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: How did absolutely I mean Entrepreneur of the Year, Environmentalist
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: of the year, small business Person of the I mean,
• 20:30
  Speaker 2: I've got more freaking plaques hanging on the wall than
• 20:32
  Speaker 2: than than Elvis Presley does. I think I don't know gracelas.
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: So okay, all right, So but obviously personally, as you said,
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: stuff was going on intensely. How did things after that
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: MDMA experience? What shifted for you in terms of your business?
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: If anything, I.
• 20:55
  Speaker 2: Became easier to work with, I became a better employer,
• 21:00
  Speaker 2: I mean, it's in the houterary pair business. A technician
• 21:03
  Speaker 2: stays with the company eighteen months, twenty months. I've got
• 21:09
  Speaker 2: employees that have been with me thirty two years, thirty years,
• 21:13
  Speaker 2: nineteen years, eighteen years. It's primarily because of the changes
• 21:19
  Speaker 2: that I have gone through. I've become a better leader.
• 21:24
  Speaker 2: I keep after the MDMA experience, I continue working on
• 21:28
  Speaker 2: me to be the best version of me that I
• 21:32
  Speaker 2: can become. And I'm not advocating that anybody do anything
• 21:37
  Speaker 2: that's illegal in this country, of course, right, that's not
• 21:40
  Speaker 2: the point. But I do know that there are there
• 21:43
  Speaker 2: are ways that people can get help. I know that
• 21:49
  Speaker 2: it changes your life when you get the proper help.
• 21:54
  Speaker 1: So, Jerry and Laura, let me ask, so, how did
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: that How does that inform the world you're doing? Now?
• 22:03
  Speaker 1: What are you teaching people? What are you teaching people
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: as a result, I guess of that trauma experience and
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: the healing journey you've went on and I guess continue
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: to go on. How is that informing what you're teaching people? Now?
• 22:19
  Speaker 2: That's a great question, okay, And the reality of it
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: is what we teach them are the basic fundamentals of
• 22:29
  Speaker 2: a successful life. Most people never got that education. They
• 22:35
  Speaker 2: don't know. Everybody has a different level of hygiene, right,
• 22:39
  Speaker 2: everybody has a different level of cleanliness. Everybody has a
• 22:42
  Speaker 2: different level of the different version of success. And that's
• 22:46
  Speaker 2: why we specifically restrict it to small numbers in our
• 22:49
  Speaker 2: group so that we learn what your idea is and
• 22:55
  Speaker 2: if it's right, we'll add fuel to that fire. And
• 22:58
  Speaker 2: if it isn't, well, help you to understand.
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: Give me an example.
• 23:02
  Speaker 4: I'd like to I'd like to give you an example.
• 23:04
  Speaker 3: So before we did the MDMA therapy, our coaching, because
• 23:09
  Speaker 3: we have been coaching for twelve years now, and it
• 23:12
  Speaker 3: was all about business and that was pretty much it.
• 23:16
  Speaker 3: It's like, okay, these are the fundamentals of business.
• 23:18
  Speaker 4: This is money, and.
• 23:21
  Speaker 3: We didn't really have much about relationships, marriage, children. How
• 23:27
  Speaker 3: do you communicate with your kids? How do you communicate
• 23:29
  Speaker 3: with your employees? How do you we didn't have that.
• 23:32
  Speaker 2: How do you save your marriage?
• 23:34
  Speaker 4: Yeah, how do you not get divorced? How do you
• 23:37
  Speaker 4: be real?
• 23:38
  Speaker 3: How do you be have a forward facing front that's
• 23:43
  Speaker 3: the same as your private Like, there's.
• 23:47
  Speaker 4: Not two personalities everybody has.
• 23:49
  Speaker 2: I mean, you'll find that most people have an online
• 23:52
  Speaker 2: social media personality that's mostly bullshit compared to what their
• 23:57
  Speaker 2: real personality is, right, I mean we all know that.
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: How many social influencers have declared bankruptcy because they can't
• 24:03
  Speaker 2: maintain their own lifestyle and they're out there trying to
• 24:06
  Speaker 2: get everybody else to do that, right, which is insane
• 24:08
  Speaker 2: to me. But nonetheless, you have your social media or
• 24:13
  Speaker 2: you know, persona for work, and then at home your
• 24:17
  Speaker 2: wife goes, I don't know who you are, dude, right, right,
• 24:20
  Speaker 2: And so we help you to meld that together. So
• 24:23
  Speaker 2: you have one persona and you are your authentic self, your.
• 24:27
  Speaker 3: True essential, authentic who God sent you to be here,
• 24:32
  Speaker 3: alive and with vitality and living your best life. How
• 24:37
  Speaker 3: do you have it all? Not just money, not just freedom,
• 24:41
  Speaker 3: not just legacy. It's how do you enjoy your friends?
• 24:44
  Speaker 3: How do you enjoy your family? How do you enjoy
• 24:47
  Speaker 3: your friend your employees? How do you love your business?
• 24:52
  Speaker 3: Again too, how do you like because a lot of
• 24:55
  Speaker 3: them are there, I'm not having fun here, I'm just
• 24:57
  Speaker 3: going to sell it or shut it down.
• 24:58
  Speaker 4: Well, maybe it's the person in.
• 25:00
  Speaker 3: The mirror that had a little bit of work done,
• 25:04
  Speaker 3: because we were at that point, we were like you
• 25:06
  Speaker 3: know what this business suns.
• 25:08
  Speaker 2: I don't want to do this anymore.
• 25:10
  Speaker 3: And then we worked on us and it's like, wow,
• 25:12
  Speaker 3: this business is actually a really good business when it
• 25:16
  Speaker 3: was us.
• 25:17
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so that's incredible.
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: I mean, it's it's very inspiring to me to hear
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: both of you say that. And are you saying that, Like,
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: prior to you both kind of working on yourselves, your
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: attitude was different.
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: Yes, my whole goal was to was to create a
• 25:40
  Speaker 2: certain amount of net worth. And then I didn't care
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: if we fire sold everything, shut it down because I
• 25:48
  Speaker 2: didn't you know, I wasn't empathetic to my employees. I
• 25:52
  Speaker 2: didn't understand. Uh. Someone referred to me says, you know,
• 25:57
  Speaker 2: you're like Spock on Star Wars Star Trek, right, you
• 26:01
  Speaker 2: have no emotions. It's like, well, I'm not here to
• 26:04
  Speaker 2: have emotions. I'm here to earn money. And I you know,
• 26:09
  Speaker 2: you can't be so lopsided and be successful, right, you
• 26:14
  Speaker 2: you must And that's part of what we help you
• 26:17
  Speaker 2: do is we help you to find balance. And and
• 26:20
  Speaker 2: that's that's really a profound thing. And people go, oh,
• 26:25
  Speaker 2: there's no such thing as work life balance. You know,
• 26:28
  Speaker 2: I don't know that I would argue that one way
• 26:30
  Speaker 2: or the other. What I do know is we can
• 26:32
  Speaker 2: help you become more balanced mm hmmm in every aspect
• 26:38
  Speaker 2: of your life. And there's an exercise that we do
• 26:41
  Speaker 2: several times a year so that our our folks can
• 26:45
  Speaker 2: see where they are compared to where they were and
• 26:48
  Speaker 2: compared to where they will be in another few months.
• 26:51
  Speaker 2: And it's like, wow, that's that's a powerful exercise. I've
• 26:55
  Speaker 2: never seen that, and I love it, and we're going
• 26:57
  Speaker 2: to keep doing it. So yeah, so who comes to you?
• 27:03
  Speaker 2: Who are you folks catering too?
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: Who's like your target audience you mentioned like chucking a
• 27:11
  Speaker 1: truck type thing, but most is this someone who has
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: a business who has reached a certain annual in revenue
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: income or not.
• 27:22
  Speaker 3: Is anyone the annual revenue generally is five hundred thousand
• 27:25
  Speaker 3: and ten million. They're successful, They're already somewhat successful.
• 27:32
  Speaker 2: They're just missing they're missing the few pieces, right.
• 27:35
  Speaker 3: Yeah, they know that something is like you know what
• 27:37
  Speaker 3: if I could just get that like I'm just about
• 27:39
  Speaker 3: to turn the corner kind of thing and everything's going
• 27:42
  Speaker 3: to be good. The majority of our men are between
• 27:46
  Speaker 3: the ages of thirty five and fifty I'd say the
• 27:49
  Speaker 3: average age is forty one.
• 27:51
  Speaker 2: I think right now forty one forty two.
• 27:53
  Speaker 3: So they're they're well on their way. They have usually
• 27:58
  Speaker 3: they're they're married, they have kids. Sometimes their marriage is great.
• 28:02
  Speaker 3: Sometimes their marriages like she's like, can you fix him?
• 28:07
  Speaker 3: And he's like, can you fix her? You know so,
• 28:11
  Speaker 3: so I'll tell you a specific example.
• 28:14
  Speaker 4: We had a guy that came to the ranch and.
• 28:17
  Speaker 3: He had a week with us, and when he went home,
• 28:23
  Speaker 3: his wife said, I don't know exactly what you guys
• 28:28
  Speaker 3: did or talked about, but this.
• 28:32
  Speaker 1: Is can you keep him there?
• 28:35
  Speaker 4: Go back to the ranch? The answer is yes, And
• 28:37
  Speaker 4: I want.
• 28:38
  Speaker 3: To be in to give you a specific example in
• 28:41
  Speaker 3: the past. So when he left us, he went camping
• 28:44
  Speaker 3: with his wife and three daughters. And on the last day,
• 28:47
  Speaker 3: it was raining and the girls went for a walk
• 28:51
  Speaker 3: and they called him at the campground. They called him
• 28:56
  Speaker 3: and said, hey, Dad, we're at the pool because he's
• 29:00
  Speaker 3: looking for and where are you?
• 29:01
  Speaker 4: Where at the pool?
• 29:02
  Speaker 3: And he goes to the pool and all three of
• 29:03
  Speaker 3: the girls are in the pool with all their clothes on.
• 29:06
  Speaker 4: In the past, he would have been so pissed.
• 29:10
  Speaker 3: All this extra work and your closer you're wet and
• 29:15
  Speaker 3: now and we have to drive home.
• 29:16
  Speaker 4: And you know what he did. He jumped in the
• 29:19
  Speaker 4: pool with them.
• 29:21
  Speaker 3: They created a memory that they still talk about. And
• 29:26
  Speaker 3: his girls this they're they're like, this is the dad
• 29:31
  Speaker 3: that we hope for, Like, you're so much fun now, Dad.
• 29:35
  Speaker 3: And he loves being with them, and they love being
• 29:37
  Speaker 3: with him. And his and his office, his employees. They
• 29:42
  Speaker 3: are bending over backwards to do whatever it is that
• 29:44
  Speaker 3: he wants because he has become that leader that people
• 29:48
  Speaker 3: want to follow. He doesn't have to go around behind
• 29:51
  Speaker 3: them and say I told you to you're not doing
• 29:54
  Speaker 3: your job. It's like they are looking for ways to
• 29:57
  Speaker 3: do things for him because he's become such an in
• 30:00
  Speaker 3: inspiration to them.
• 30:01
  Speaker 2: He called us up one morning. He said, I I
• 30:05
  Speaker 2: want you to know last night I was just sitting
• 30:08
  Speaker 2: down in my chair and my twelve year old daughter
• 30:11
  Speaker 2: came up to me, wrapped her arms around my neck,
• 30:15
  Speaker 2: kissed me in the cheek and said, Daddy, I really
• 30:17
  Speaker 2: love you. And he got all choked up, and I'm
• 30:21
  Speaker 2: getting choked up thinking about it because he said, she's
• 30:24
  Speaker 2: never done that in her life.
• 30:26
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 30:28
  Speaker 2: He said, thank you for getting me my family back. Oh.
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: My god, look at you, guys.
• 30:34
  Speaker 4: Anger is Jerry. Not that all of our guys have
• 30:37
  Speaker 4: that anger, but it was sure, surely resonated.
• 30:39
  Speaker 3: And wow, he was able to see where that anger
• 30:43
  Speaker 3: came from. He was able to choose something else, he
• 30:47
  Speaker 3: was able to shed it, and he was meant to
• 30:50
  Speaker 3: be because it no longer ran him.
• 30:52
  Speaker 2: That's intense. Yeah, it's like intense.
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: That's like like soul work. I mean it sounds. I
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: can imagine you guys getting in there with someone and
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: just saying like you need to.
• 31:05
  Speaker 2: Chill the f Well, we do it in different ways,
• 31:08
  Speaker 2: but you know.
• 31:09
  Speaker 1: I'm sure you do. I'm sure you do.
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: The reality of it is everyone thinks that they need
• 31:17
  Speaker 2: more money. Yeah, and usually Yeah, I'll be happy when
• 31:22
  Speaker 2: I make a million, I'll be happy when I make
• 31:24
  Speaker 2: five million. I'll be happy when I make ten million. Brother,
• 31:27
  Speaker 2: I with no one promise you'll be happy. I will
• 31:29
  Speaker 2: help you be happy. Now, I'll I'll be happy when
• 31:34
  Speaker 2: my kids are grown out of the house. Well, that's
• 31:36
  Speaker 2: a terrible thing to think, right, No, that's not how
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: it's supposed to go. That's not that to me. That's
• 31:42
  Speaker 2: that's not being a real father. You're a provider. You
• 31:47
  Speaker 2: may be the provider and protector, you're not their daddy,
• 31:52
  Speaker 2: right And so when you add that, when you add
• 31:55
  Speaker 2: that component back to a man's life. See when I
• 31:59
  Speaker 2: was single and I never had kids or anything at
• 32:02
  Speaker 2: that point, and had never been married, and someone said,
• 32:05
  Speaker 2: what is your definition of success? And my definition of
• 32:10
  Speaker 2: success was, I will feel like I'm successful if I
• 32:15
  Speaker 2: hear my kids talking about me to their friends without
• 32:18
  Speaker 2: them knowing that I'm listening, and they talk about me
• 32:21
  Speaker 2: with love and respect, And that to me is a
• 32:25
  Speaker 2: successful man. Having money. Don't misunderstand or misinterpret having money.
• 32:34
  Speaker 2: Money is a tool, that's all it is. It's a
• 32:37
  Speaker 2: tool to help you to be more of who it
• 32:41
  Speaker 2: is that you are intended to be. If you know
• 32:44
  Speaker 2: someone who's a jerk, they're going to be a jerk
• 32:47
  Speaker 2: with money. If you know someone who's a wonderful human being,
• 32:50
  Speaker 2: they're going to be a wonderful human They're gonna be
• 32:52
  Speaker 2: even more of a wonderful human being because they have money.
• 32:55
  Speaker 2: Does that make sense? That makes perfect amplifier, Just like Psycho,
• 33:00
  Speaker 2: that's our an amplifier. Money is a major amplifier. So
• 33:03
  Speaker 2: we help you help you to become more of who
• 33:05
  Speaker 2: you really want to be.
• 33:07
  Speaker 1: Wow, I love you guys, all right. How do people
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: learn more about you, what you're doing, and get in touch.
• 33:13
  Speaker 1: It's the best way.
• 33:14
  Speaker 2: Our line b b M M U s A dot
• 33:17
  Speaker 2: com at bb M M USA dot com, at Business
• 33:22
  Speaker 2: Builders Mentor and Mastermind USA dot com.
• 33:25
  Speaker 3: And if you just put Laura l A U r
• 33:27
  Speaker 3: A in front of that Laura at BBMMUSA dot com,
• 33:31
  Speaker 3: you can send me an email.
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah okay, and we'll have that linked up here at
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: the show notes page at the Trauma Therapist podcast dot com. Folks. Awesome,
• 33:40
  Speaker 1: I mean really, I love you guys. You're so inspiring.
• 33:43
  Speaker 1: Love to have you back at a later date, and
• 33:46
  Speaker 1: I really appreciate you coming on here, and uh.
• 33:49
  Speaker 4: Thank you.
• 33:51
  Speaker 3: Thank you guys for all that you do to help
• 33:54
  Speaker 3: spread the word of healing. Because you've probably heard the phrase.
• 33:58
  Speaker 4: Hurt people, hurt people definitely, you also say heal people,
• 34:02
  Speaker 4: heal people.
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: There you go.
• 34:05
  Speaker 2: I love it.
• 34:05
  Speaker 1: Thank you all right, appreciate that we'll be in touch.
• 34:09
  Speaker 2: Thank you, taking care. Thank you,