Latest / I Said No Gifts! A comedy interview podcast with Bridger Winegar / Unlocked Patreon Episode: Brendan Scannell Thinks He Can Disobey Bridger Behind the Paywall

Transcript

Unlocked Patreon Episode: Brendan Scannell Thinks He Can Disobey Bridger Behind the Paywall · I Said No Gifts! A comedy interview podcast with Bridger Winegar

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Okay, the theme song's not going to play yet because
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: I want to tell you that this episode, well, we
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: were supposed to rerun an episode. We do that on
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: occasion for whatever reason, and I thought, why not play
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: a new ish episode. This is from the Patreon you know,
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: usually these are behind the paywall, but I'm feeling very
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: generous and so we're going to play the episode, a
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: recent one with Brendan Scanel. It's wonderful. Hopefully it'll be
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: a little taste for you. We're in the backyard. This
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: is kind of what we're doing behind the paywall at
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: patreon dot com slash. I said, no gifts, and now
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: here's the episode.
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: The lie invit did you hear.
• 0:48
  Speaker 3: Fun a man? Myself perfectly clear? But you're I guess Tom,
• 0:56
  Speaker 3: you gotta come to me empty And I said, no guests,
• 1:02
  Speaker 3: your presences press. I'm already too much stuff.
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: So how do you dare disurbey? Mean?
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: Welcome to I said, no gifts. I'm Richard Wine girl.
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: We're in the backyard. The weather is gorgeous today, feeling
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: very spoiled by mother nature, and the birds are in
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: the trees. The children are screaming at the elementary school
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: I'm in total control of my life and no one
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: can say otherwise. Everything is going as smoothly as ever
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: and the future is right. Is there anything that's happened?
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: I had a cob salad last night. If you haven't
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: had one recently, get into it. But I think we
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: should we should do the episode. I love today's guest.
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: This is actually his third time on the podcast, but
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: his first kind of traditional time. It's Brendan Scanel Brendan.
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: Welcome to Izahi.
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: Bye, how are you?
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: I'm I'm so good?
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: Are you their eyes?
• 2:18
  Speaker 4: There is a light, even if you can't hear it
• 2:20
  Speaker 4: in his voice, there is a twinkle.
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: You have a true twinkle in your eye.
• 2:24
  Speaker 2: Today I'm on the up and up.
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: We should say it's Tuesday.
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: It's Tuesday.
• 2:30
  Speaker 4: Tuesday always a really good day for me. Also, I
• 2:34
  Speaker 4: have done this podcast before. The first time over Zoom,
• 2:37
  Speaker 4: I was in a we work which remember those days?
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: What a that must have been twenty twenty one.
• 2:43
  Speaker 4: It's twenty twenty maybe twenty twenty one. And then the
• 2:47
  Speaker 4: second time I did it live in Chicago.
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: All of your fans like.
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: A year ago, probably next week or something.
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: I'm so impressed by their devotion to you. I love them.
• 2:57
  Speaker 2: They're great people, right, somebody had come in from Omah.
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: You have people try. I mean that to me is
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: always like I just people are so wonderful, And I
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: think I'm a bad fan of the things I.
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: Like because you don't show up.
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: I won't travel across the city. No, I need to
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: be better about this.
• 3:12
  Speaker 4: When's the last time you came to one of my
• 3:14
  Speaker 4: comedy shows. You're a fan of mine, and yet I
• 3:17
  Speaker 4: don't think you've ever seen me.
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: Welcome to Los Angeles, Welcome to Los Angeles. It actually
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: is so shameful that comedy people don't go see comedy
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: people more often. I mean, like, I get it, but
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: I find you deeply funny. Thank you in person and
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: as a stand up. And yet what am I doing
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: this is how like I think I've seen a total
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: of three of my friends perform five. In my defense,
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: I'm not a stand up. Like you've probably seen most
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: of your friends before.
• 3:46
  Speaker 2: I've seen most of my friends.
• 3:47
  Speaker 4: I've seen my friends bomb, I've seen my friends succeed.
• 3:51
  Speaker 4: I've seen some of my friends get so famous and
• 3:53
  Speaker 4: it changes them.
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: They get nervous in public, and I'm like, no, one's
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: looking at you, no one.
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: No one's really famous anymore, not enough to be nervous.
• 4:02
  Speaker 4: Right, But then you will be with somebody and like
• 4:05
  Speaker 4: heads will turn sure, and that's exciting because I like
• 4:08
  Speaker 4: to think that they're turning at me.
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I just assume they're for you.
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: Right, You don't know, you don't know, you have no idea,
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: no idea. But yeah, you came to the Chicago show.
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: You brought me some used food?
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: I did. I brought you leftovers. Yeah, that was such
• 4:24
  Speaker 2: a great show. The Den, the Den.
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: I loved the Den. I loved the whole vibe. I
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: wasted my time in Chicago.
• 4:32
  Speaker 2: Right, you didn't do anything.
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: I did nothing except for go to a bakery and
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: then eat at small Cheval every meal?
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: Is that the burger place?
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: Okay, they've got like kind of a more casual version
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: of it that was near my hotel, and it just
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: wasn't I didn't have the energy.
• 4:47
  Speaker 2: Cheval is horse right? It is? Wait? I think it?
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: Wait? Is that true? Cheval means horse that's in fret, right,
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: and the French are famous for eating horse right exactly?
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: That's a date? Is that?
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: Wow?
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: That's a dangerous name for a Hamburger restaurant is.
• 5:05
  Speaker 2: Oh cheval, does that mean of the horse?
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: I'm googling because that to me if you're serving meat.
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: How international is your crowd?
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: That's a good question. I think we've got a good
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: European audience, you do, yes, and Scandinavian we have, and
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: then sprinkling everywhere.
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: Okay, Well, I'm going to be at Edinburgh Fringe this summer.
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: Oh We've got course out the ass.
• 5:30
  Speaker 4: To perform my solo show in Scotland, and so if
• 5:34
  Speaker 4: you're listening to this, I'll see you there and come
• 5:37
  Speaker 4: up and I'll tell you what Bridger's like in person.
• 5:41
  Speaker 2: So awful, lovely.
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: Oh cheval, I mean the amount of time I'm taking.
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: That's ian.
• 5:47
  Speaker 2: Well. I took French lessons in Silver Lake at a
• 5:49
  Speaker 2: place called Cuckoo. You did, I did?
• 5:52
  Speaker 4: And then I took them on zoom during the pandemic.
• 5:54
  Speaker 4: But mostly I just wanted to hang out with the
• 5:56
  Speaker 4: cool French girls on zoom teaching me.
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: Did you pick an up?
• 6:04
  Speaker 2: No?
• 6:05
  Speaker 4: In retrospect, I can't even of the horse on horseback,
• 6:09
  Speaker 4: on horse on horseback, so it's.
• 6:12
  Speaker 2: Not a safe place to eat.
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: Famously, not a great have.
• 6:16
  Speaker 2: You been on a horse recently.
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: No, I haven't been on a horse since probably elementary school.
• 6:21
  Speaker 2: Babe.
• 6:21
  Speaker 4: I'm telling you, as soon as I get on a horse,
• 6:23
  Speaker 4: I went off the horse like about every eighteen months
• 6:27
  Speaker 4: to two years. It's like, ooh, like maybe when we're
• 6:31
  Speaker 4: in Mexico, will do like.
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: A horse ride. And then you're on the horse.
• 6:35
  Speaker 4: And the flies are in your eyes and the tail
• 6:38
  Speaker 4: is whipping you and they're shitting and the nice Mexican
• 6:43
  Speaker 4: trow guide is talking shit about you to the other one.
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: You're fully exposed to the sun.
• 6:50
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, never good for us.
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: Yeah, of course the horse is a hot animal, so
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: I can imagine that's when was the last time? Was
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: it in Mexico?
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: It was in Mexico?
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, And where did you take the horse?
• 7:02
  Speaker 4: Like into the brush? I thought it was going to
• 7:04
  Speaker 4: be on the beach, you.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: Know, at last on the beach would be.
• 7:07
  Speaker 4: And it wasn't a white horse, so it wouldn't wasn't
• 7:10
  Speaker 4: even a good photos.
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: Just like like a crappy brown horse. Truly something you'd
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: see any farm.
• 7:17
  Speaker 2: Oh my god.
• 7:18
  Speaker 4: So I just went on this gay cruise. I just
• 7:21
  Speaker 4: performed on a gay cruise and sladd But the cruise
• 7:25
  Speaker 4: was from La to pointa Arta and there were a
• 7:28
  Speaker 4: lot of puppies on the cruise.
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: Oh this is new.
• 7:33
  Speaker 2: You know. They wear the puppy mask.
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: Oh okay, I thought you were talking about. Actually, okay,
• 7:38
  Speaker 1: masks and God bless everyone.
• 7:41
  Speaker 2: But the God blessed with their kinks.
• 7:43
  Speaker 4: But there's puppies, you know, and they're like pissing and
• 7:45
  Speaker 4: shipping all over the cruise everywhere. Oh, schools out. Anyway,
• 7:51
  Speaker 4: a bunch of the puppies booked a shore excursion where
• 7:56
  Speaker 4: they went on horses in mask in their masks. There
• 8:00
  Speaker 4: was a bunch of puppies on the horses and you know,
• 8:06
  Speaker 4: God bless.
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: The way reality is just you really.
• 8:10
  Speaker 2: Can't just live whatever life you want.
• 8:13
  Speaker 4: You.
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: I grew up Catholic, you grew up Mormon.
• 8:14
  Speaker 4: Think of all the rules, why you were supposed to behave,
• 8:19
  Speaker 4: how everyone was supposed to think about you, how everyone
• 8:22
  Speaker 4: was supposed to perceive your.
• 8:23
  Speaker 2: Family six by six blocks you lived in.
• 8:26
  Speaker 4: Completely fake puppies are on horses in Point of Iarta.
• 8:33
  Speaker 4: There are no rules.
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: Did you see any in your audience?
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: You know, I try not to look my audience in
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: the face. Just performed directly over their heads. I actually
• 8:46
  Speaker 2: did not clock any puppies.
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: Is so distracting.
• 8:50
  Speaker 4: You know, the shows were somewhat late. They were at
• 8:52
  Speaker 4: like ten and eleven per minute. Should get that the
• 8:55
  Speaker 4: puppies were already asleep.
• 8:58
  Speaker 2: They get so tired.
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: Did you do any excursions while you were on the crew.
• 9:03
  Speaker 4: I didn't leave the boat. I was on eight days.
• 9:07
  Speaker 4: Did not get off the boat.
• 9:08
  Speaker 2: There were four different port stops. You were in jail.
• 9:13
  Speaker 4: I was committed to being on this ship. Well here's
• 9:17
  Speaker 4: what was nice during the port moments. A lot of
• 9:20
  Speaker 4: people get off the ship, right, so you kind of
• 9:22
  Speaker 4: have the ship to yourself.
• 9:23
  Speaker 1: It's like no parents, right, quiet right.
• 9:27
  Speaker 2: All the restaurants you can eat at them.
• 9:28
  Speaker 4: Whenever you wanted the gym, you know Bridger buff Then
• 9:35
  Speaker 4: you think.
• 9:37
  Speaker 2: That was the best time to go to the gym?
• 9:38
  Speaker 2: Was time?
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I I assume on a gay cruise the gym
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: is just a nightmare.
• 9:43
  Speaker 2: I woke up the.
• 9:44
  Speaker 4: First day at seven am, being like, you know, all
• 9:46
  Speaker 4: these party people are going to be, you know, not
• 9:49
  Speaker 4: awake at Not true.
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: It was packed.
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: That should be Behalf of a gay cruise is just
• 9:55
  Speaker 1: a gym facility.
• 9:56
  Speaker 2: Right, I agree? It wasn't big enough. Wow, I'm not
• 9:59
  Speaker 2: a cruise but you have been on one.
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: I have been on one. I just like the idea
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: of going to a port and then just like going
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: to what is essentially like a mall and then having
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: to get back on the boat and being like, oh,
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: there's other stuff there that I could have seen.
• 10:13
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I it just wasn't for me. I was really
• 10:17
  Speaker 4: committed to being Oh beautiful bird just flew into this.
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: Oh yoh look at it.
• 10:24
  Speaker 4: Oh it'd be fun if gay guys were like, I'm
• 10:26
  Speaker 4: a birdie, you know, and they were like little birds
• 10:30
  Speaker 4: with their little they had their claws on, because I
• 10:33
  Speaker 4: think the idea of being a puppy is that, like
• 10:37
  Speaker 4: life is.
• 10:37
  Speaker 2: So confusing and confounding and overwhelming, and don't you just
• 10:43
  Speaker 2: want somebody to scratch your ears and call you a good.
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: Boy, tell you what to do right, and be.
• 10:48
  Speaker 4: Like get over here, a little guy, I love you,
• 10:51
  Speaker 4: and be showered with affection.
• 10:53
  Speaker 1: And so what would a birdie be? Someone just throws it?
• 10:56
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, throws a towel over your cage.
• 11:00
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, you calm you down.
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: I don't know what else? What else do you do
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: with a bird? I guess maybe it's like more of
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: a like a voyeuristic thing. You have people watching you, Yeah,
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: major binoculars.
• 11:11
  Speaker 2: Oh yes, and you sort of like do your little mating.
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: Ritual right to a lot of squawking, shrieking.
• 11:19
  Speaker 2: Showing your what's coleoqula? What is coloqula? Isn't that like
• 11:24
  Speaker 2: a word for a butthole? I've never heard a bird butthole.
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: It's very close to Caligula. Maybe that's what I'm thinking
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: of the Roman Emperor.
• 11:35
  Speaker 2: Let's go Roman, Let's go Roman Empire, Let's go school.
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: Is that true?
• 11:40
  Speaker 3: Now?
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: Like, is that? I'm pretty sure Caligula was kind of a.
• 11:43
  Speaker 2: Decade or maybe yes he was like nero.
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so this is where we.
• 11:48
  Speaker 2: Have a mad king. Now can this podcast be political?
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: Don't get me started. We should reveal now we are
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: both Trump floaters. Yes, we're behind the payball right now.
• 12:03
  Speaker 4: I just don't get I drove here. This was a
• 12:06
  Speaker 4: jump scare on your street. Is a car with a
• 12:10
  Speaker 4: Kamala exclamation mark bumper sticker still on it, And it's like,
• 12:14
  Speaker 4: can can you just get a little razor blade and
• 12:18
  Speaker 4: just scratch that thing off so that I'm not screaming
• 12:22
  Speaker 4: inside when I see it?
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: That car is really interesting because it had every bumpersticker
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: from every Democratic candidate on it at once. Okay, that
• 12:32
  Speaker 1: wasn't sure what the endgame was.
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: That's somebody who's responding to all the texts.
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: You know, rather than saying stop and report.
• 12:40
  Speaker 4: Spam, stop, stop stop. I can't stop fast enough. Where
• 12:43
  Speaker 4: they're selling my number down the.
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: River, I don't know. I don't know who the first
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: person was that I gave my number two.
• 12:51
  Speaker 4: Sometimes my car will start reading one of those texts,
• 12:54
  Speaker 4: you know, it'll be like new text from my No.
• 12:57
  Speaker 2: Number, and I'll click it and it'll be like, how,
• 13:02
  Speaker 2: well it's happened again.
• 13:03
  Speaker 4: I'm Monica Lafontaine from Boise and they're coming for me.
• 13:11
  Speaker 2: Thankfully.
• 13:11
  Speaker 4: You can give me five dollars and I won't kill myself.
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: I just like.
• 13:18
  Speaker 2: Stop.
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: This is essentially a ransom text.
• 13:22
  Speaker 2: Well they've caught me again. I'm in the cage and
• 13:25
  Speaker 2: they've covered it with the blanket.
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: Birdie culture is not what you think it is. Oh No.
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: The thing that I'll get on voice text occasionally is
• 13:35
  Speaker 1: Jim and I will send back in fourth hour connections
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: results from the New York Times game, which are like
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: five yellow squares five and it will read one yellow square,
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: one yellow square, one yellow square. It's like, okay, stop,
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: it needs to be able to recognize things that don't
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: need to be read alone.
• 13:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it needs it needs to be better.
• 13:54
  Speaker 1: We do have a two houses down I'll speak quietly,
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: a trumper who his wife has left him heat. The
• 14:07
  Speaker 1: police have gone into his house with their guns trained.
• 14:12
  Speaker 1: I looked on the app and it said somebody had
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: said that there was somebody running around.
• 14:16
  Speaker 2: With are you next door? Is this the app?
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: This was there's another one hmmm, some crime because I
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: was like, what's going on? And the report was somebody
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: had a mattress or a bed comforter over their head
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: and was running around. So I'm not sure what is
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: going on? And I see the guy on occasion terrifying. Yeah,
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: so I'm like, you know, people, there are a lot
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: of weird la murders. Oh, I'm not that far from
• 14:42
  Speaker 1: this person. I hope he's not a listener.
• 14:45
  Speaker 4: Maybe he was just trying to put his duvet cover on.
• 14:48
  Speaker 4: We know how hard that, especially if with how small
• 14:51
  Speaker 4: we are, we can get caught in there.
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: Then you're stumbling around the house.
• 14:55
  Speaker 2: Right, it's not in a handkerchief.
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: Oh well, I think we should look. I've delayed long enough.
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: We should get into something else. I didn't want to
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: talk to you about you put on the podcast twice before,
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: once over, Zoom, once live, so obviously the rules were
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: a little bit blurrier than the podcast is called. I
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: said no gifts, right, so I was a little surprised.
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: I was genuinely looking forward to having you here today.
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: That kind of fell apart when you came into the
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: backyard holding but from where I'm sitting looks like a gift.
• 15:34
  Speaker 4: It is, unfortunately okay. And I never show up anywhere
• 15:38
  Speaker 4: empty handed?
• 15:39
  Speaker 2: Do you ever host? And people just show up and
• 15:42
  Speaker 2: they tacky? Don't even bring a candle, bring a box
• 15:46
  Speaker 2: of Lacroix's sake. I mean, I know you don't drink.
• 15:50
  Speaker 4: I don't drink anymore, and so I'm always bringing nay everything.
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: This is how I am, you know, juice, some sort
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: of thing that I can hold in my hand and
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: carry around the party.
• 16:01
  Speaker 2: A diffuser that I don't want.
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: That's a good idea.
• 16:05
  Speaker 2: Oh I got a closet full of crap and bags.
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: Do you save bags?
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: Is that bags?
• 16:12
  Speaker 4: Like?
• 16:12
  Speaker 2: I am as opposed to one like if I get it.
• 16:15
  Speaker 4: If I buy something and I'm like, oh, I might
• 16:16
  Speaker 4: need to give a gift later, I'll save them.
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: I'm in a Madewell bag right now.
• 16:20
  Speaker 1: Yes, I save so many bags, especially because of this podcast.
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: Okay, so I have too some things for you. You'll
• 16:29
  Speaker 2: want to get the box first. Pulling a box out,
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: I thought about you immediately. This is so me.
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: Yes, it's the Joker, and let's be very clear, the
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: Heath Ledger Joker of course, Bobblehead, Bobblehead.
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: I think you know.
• 16:49
  Speaker 4: I went out of the closet okay, like I do
• 16:52
  Speaker 4: the one on West Hollywood because there's the weirdest crap there.
• 16:55
  Speaker 4: Oh and I bought this months ago and it's just
• 16:58
  Speaker 4: been in my car and I knew at one point
• 17:01
  Speaker 4: I would need it if I got accident, and they
• 17:05
  Speaker 4: were like, he's dead. And also there's a Joker bobblehead
• 17:10
  Speaker 4: in his trunk.
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: Is I guess the brand is head Knockers. I've never
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: heard of this head Knockers.
• 17:17
  Speaker 4: Knockers, and it's two things men love head and knockers.
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: So this is a very calculated name.
• 17:26
  Speaker 2: This is I wonder if it looks guy stunning.
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: I mean, it says it's hand painted, so obviously it'll
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: be going on a mantle or something.
• 17:32
  Speaker 2: This thing has got to be. How old do you
• 17:34
  Speaker 2: think this is? That was two thousand and seven.
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: That was two thousand, Yeah, I think seven or eight? No, yeah,
• 17:40
  Speaker 1: two thousand and eight, right, and this probably came around
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: the same time.
• 17:46
  Speaker 2: Hm.
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: Although he's you know, been, he's kind of an evergreen
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: joker at this point for lunatics.
• 17:53
  Speaker 2: I actually I never saw the new.
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: Jokers, all the new ones. Yeah, wow, this is brand new.
• 18:00
  Speaker 2: This is wow, this is mint.
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: Oh, it looks like it has a neck brace on
• 18:05
  Speaker 1: or it looks like a gorgeous little stole listener. It's
• 18:10
  Speaker 1: uh currently has some styrofoam hanging around its neck, which
• 18:13
  Speaker 1: actually makes perfect sense for this product. Let me look
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: at that. It's kind of beautifully made. That's what this
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: is like.
• 18:21
  Speaker 4: Actually sort of your vibe right now, It's like, I
• 18:25
  Speaker 4: cannot believe that this is my career.
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: Look at this. It's standing on a little, uh playing card.
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: Look at that? Did you? I'd like to know what
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: your experience was seeing this movie.
• 18:43
  Speaker 4: I think I loved it. I'm I'm sure I loved it.
• 18:48
  Speaker 4: I'm sure I actually like those, Chris Nolan ones.
• 18:52
  Speaker 1: I liked the first one. I haven't seen it in years,
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: of course not. I liked this second one up until
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: there's like a final third of the movie where it's like, oh,
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: I saw the movie was going to be over like
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: forty five.
• 19:01
  Speaker 2: Minutes ago, and they kill Maggie Jillen Hall.
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah, once Maggie's off screen, I agree.
• 19:06
  Speaker 2: Well.
• 19:06
  Speaker 4: Also in the first one, it's Katie Holmes and they
• 19:10
  Speaker 4: do that thing where they're like, and here she is,
• 19:13
  Speaker 4: the same girl. It's good to see you, Bruce, who
• 19:16
  Speaker 4: I've known forever, and you collectively as an audience member,
• 19:20
  Speaker 4: if you're watching them back to back to back, have
• 19:22
  Speaker 4: to be like, that's the same girl, different actress, same girl.
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: She's been through a lot. Yes, it's I mean like
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: kind of an aunt viv on fresh Prince right. They
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: kind of knew it a new woman, Thank you, new aunt?
• 19:39
  Speaker 2: What new aunt?
• 19:40
  Speaker 4: Why aren't we pitching that's a great new aunt?
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: Oh where did this aunt come from? We thought we
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: knew all of our aunts. Or maybe it's k n
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: e w aunt. We thought we knew aunt.
• 19:59
  Speaker 2: You knew an aunt?
• 20:01
  Speaker 4: With it just a you coming to upn you knew aunt,
• 20:06
  Speaker 4: You new aunt?
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: That's classic. You did you grow up saying aunt oront aunt?
• 20:12
  Speaker 2: I did?
• 20:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I said aunt too, And I feel so trashy
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: when I say aunt.
• 20:16
  Speaker 4: Now my uncles all sound like that SNL Chris Farley,
• 20:21
  Speaker 4: like de bears, oh s, Brendan, How is La? How
• 20:25
  Speaker 4: is it out there? A bunch of freaks and weirdos?
• 20:28
  Speaker 4: And when I first moved there, I'd be like, actually,
• 20:30
  Speaker 4: everyone's really nice. And now I'm like, ah, everyone's crazy,
• 20:34
  Speaker 4: a bunch of puppies.
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: Freak. Yeah. More and more I'm like, well, actually, I
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: think I've isolated myself within my friend group at this point,
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: which is probably bad for my career. But I'm meeting
• 20:46
  Speaker 1: less and less psychos more observing them online and hating
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: them and being jealous of their career.
• 20:53
  Speaker 4: Oh sure, Oh you know what happens when I experienced jealousy, Well,
• 20:56
  Speaker 4: I just even dear friends of mine, I just mute
• 21:00
  Speaker 4: their stories because it activates ugly feelings. Bless you, You've
• 21:09
  Speaker 4: been muted for years.
• 21:12
  Speaker 2: Why don you think I'm never responding?
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I just I do a lot of muting stories, yes,
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: but only I'm happy for real friends' success. I genuinely
• 21:22
  Speaker 1: am I'm there's jealousy, of course, but I generally won't
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: mute those people. But if they're one degree off of
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: being a real friend, whoop, you're gone from my life.
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: That makes sense to me.
• 21:35
  Speaker 4: And it's really just it's an act of self care, true,
• 21:37
  Speaker 4: and trying to protect my relationship and friendship with that
• 21:41
  Speaker 4: person and my protect my happiness for them, right, and
• 21:46
  Speaker 4: not be beset by ugly.
• 21:48
  Speaker 1: Feelings and a little revenge. Oh sure, like I want
• 21:54
  Speaker 1: them to notice I've stopped.
• 21:56
  Speaker 4: I can't see you ever acting on revenge as a
• 22:00
  Speaker 4: revengeful feeling.
• 22:02
  Speaker 2: I some people are just not revengeful.
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: I don't even know what revenge would look like.
• 22:07
  Speaker 2: I think your testoster it's too low.
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: So my doctor tells me you can't get away with revenge.
• 22:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, oh god, don't even try. Now that I was
• 22:21
  Speaker 2: just on the cruise. All my ads are for the cruise.
• 22:25
  Speaker 4: Oh good prep medication sure, and like testosterone replacement.
• 22:31
  Speaker 2: Oh interesting, these bro podcasters are on.
• 22:35
  Speaker 1: And doesn't that What does that actually do? It just
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: turns you into a rageful psycho.
• 22:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 22:40
  Speaker 4: I think like these like halbermen like Maximize your Potential
• 22:46
  Speaker 4: men are secretly all just like ripping tea.
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: I'm sure they are right, and they're all they're all
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: truly like a year away from killing a woman in
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: their life. Sure, Like these people are so dangerous and
• 22:59
  Speaker 1: they're only like just their initial mindset is bad, and
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: then they're bringing in extra testosterone, which is just mutating them.
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: Like the murders are gonna start happening more and more.
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: I think, yes, sorry, you heard it here first.
• 23:16
  Speaker 2: I'm sorry.
• 23:17
  Speaker 1: It's probably true.
• 23:19
  Speaker 2: It's probably the murder rate America is actually down. I
• 23:21
  Speaker 2: think that's true.
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: Crime rate is down, and this is we're getting because
• 23:24
  Speaker 1: we voted for Donald Trump.
• 23:25
  Speaker 2: Right. Oh, look at that beautiful bug. I've never seen
• 23:27
  Speaker 2: something like that. But that was like a creamsickle bee
• 23:30
  Speaker 2: like with orange.
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: I've literally never seen a bug like that.
• 23:35
  Speaker 2: Was a bee with no stripes.
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: I thought I had seen every type of bug, and
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: now you got ripes.
• 23:40
  Speaker 2: That'd be a great character for you to play in
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: a sketch show.
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: It just looks like a worm be without its stripes.
• 23:49
  Speaker 1: Would be a nice little children's book. Maybe we co
• 23:52
  Speaker 1: write maybe maybe I think that that's another strip's gone.
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: Oh that's a good one, and it's sort of.
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: It is ultimately about being gay.
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: Yes, yes, that's every children's novel or children's book ends
• 24:08
  Speaker 1: up being Well, it's just because the character was a gay. Great,
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: it's interesting it.
• 24:12
  Speaker 2: Has children's books. Is that at market you're interested in entering?
• 24:15
  Speaker 1: No, but I feel like that's something that somebody, if
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: they just want some extra money can It.
• 24:20
  Speaker 2: Can't be very much.
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: I think if it hits rain, you're really like it's
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: going crazy.
• 24:26
  Speaker 2: It seems like such a flooded market.
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think it's like buying a lottery ticket. Basically,
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: ray you think of like a catchy title with a
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: name in it, Wendy the Witch, or Stripe with no stripes.
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: You find a decent illustrator, and then you write fourteen
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: sentences and I'm not I know. There are a lot
• 24:42
  Speaker 1: of great, great children's books. There really are.
• 24:46
  Speaker 2: Of course they're not easy. The Polar Express.
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: The Polar Express one of my favorite films as well.
• 24:53
  Speaker 2: That's a spooky one.
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: That is a spooky one.
• 24:55
  Speaker 2: My favorite TikTok almost of all time, is about Bull Express.
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: What is it?
• 25:01
  Speaker 2: I can't describe it.
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: I'll go ahead and tell us about a TikTok followed
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: up with a dream you had recap.
• 25:08
  Speaker 2: She just said, if the Polar Express was actually good.
• 25:13
  Speaker 4: And it's just Cral singing like prison book, I just
• 25:21
  Speaker 4: have to send it to you.
• 25:23
  Speaker 2: She's like singing creed.
• 25:28
  Speaker 4: Yeah, are you still on TikTok?
• 25:32
  Speaker 1: I post clips of the podcast, just how the audience is.
• 25:39
  Speaker 1: I think people are leaving TikTok.
• 25:40
  Speaker 2: I think so too. But it's also truly.
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: I think it's the worst app like because it will
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: find a keyword in the audio you upload that will
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: not be offensive, but it will find offensive and it
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: will say, well, I'm not showing that zero views shut.
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: It's really like. I uploaded a video from the podcast
• 26:00
  Speaker 1: of Elena Johnston talking about how after she saw Casper
• 26:04
  Speaker 1: the Friendly Ghost as a kid and seeing the kissing scene,
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: she wanted she had seen as enough that she could
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: kill herself. Very innocent joke.
• 26:12
  Speaker 4: Oh yeah, you can't say who cannot say KMS.
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: Well, she didn't even say kill herself. She's just like
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: basically indicated that she would end her life. Right.
• 26:21
  Speaker 2: That app is so good bye.
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: Bye go bye bye. Oh. And the way it's like
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: change the way people talk. I'm aliving.
• 26:27
  Speaker 2: All this is so early.
• 26:28
  Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, you're so on you're doing a good job
• 26:31
  Speaker 1: on ty.
• 26:32
  Speaker 2: I'm having I'm like, now is my moment. All the
• 26:37
  Speaker 2: creators have left.
• 26:38
  Speaker 4: It's completely demonetized, like there's no way to make money
• 26:43
  Speaker 4: on it off it anymore. And I met with some
• 26:48
  Speaker 4: agent at before this agency dropped me and he was like,
• 26:52
  Speaker 4: you have to be making video content, and so now
• 26:57
  Speaker 4: I am.
• 26:58
  Speaker 2: And then I was dropped.
• 27:02
  Speaker 4: As soon as I started this age. Yeah, we're seeing
• 27:08
  Speaker 4: the content and it's just not working.
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: You actually are doing what I see TikTok when it
• 27:17
  Speaker 1: allows me to see one of your things. However, it
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: decides that it's always so good, Oh thank you, it's always.
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: But I think I'm in the same boat as you
• 27:24
  Speaker 1: of like joining any of these services, I'm always too late,
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: right because I think what happens is annoying people join first,
• 27:33
  Speaker 1: annoying ambitious people, and so i'm it's off putting, and
• 27:38
  Speaker 1: then I wait too long because normal people start getting on.
• 27:40
  Speaker 1: But I'm so irritated so long that I wait long
• 27:43
  Speaker 1: enough for it to then be worths me.
• 27:45
  Speaker 2: I feel like we just got to be on the
• 27:46
  Speaker 2: lookout for the next one. What is the next one?
• 27:49
  Speaker 2: What could it possibly offer?
• 27:50
  Speaker 4: There has to be one out there, and once it's
• 27:54
  Speaker 4: out there, we're gonna attack.
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: We're gonna go full throttle, and then it'll be a
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: flop one.
• 27:59
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 28:00
  Speaker 4: Well, this is a big part of my I'm now
• 28:02
  Speaker 4: been like sober for a year and a half and
• 28:05
  Speaker 4: a big part of my like going to rehab and
• 28:10
  Speaker 4: embracing something you've just done casually your whole life is
• 28:15
  Speaker 4: just being like, I'm not taking anything on, I am
• 28:20
  Speaker 4: not taking anything personally. I'm just going to continually to
• 28:24
  Speaker 4: show up and be like I'm still here.
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: That's great, that's wonderful.
• 28:31
  Speaker 2: It's feeling you know, That's how I'm here right now.
• 28:35
  Speaker 4: You and Bridger, I'm doing a solo show at Hollywood
• 28:38
  Speaker 4: Fringe and Edinburgh Fringe, and your audience are people who
• 28:44
  Speaker 4: I feel like, if they're listening to you regularly, they
• 28:48
  Speaker 4: must be cool and I want to communicate with them
• 28:51
  Speaker 4: and I want them to see the piece that.
• 28:54
  Speaker 2: I'm working on.
• 28:55
  Speaker 1: What is it that you're working on? Oh, here we
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: get into let's get into.
• 28:59
  Speaker 2: The other thing that I brought you. I brought you merch.
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: Oh my god, this is your own myth merch, my owniness,
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: tasteful merch.
• 29:07
  Speaker 2: Thank you, my boyfriend makes merch for a living.
• 29:09
  Speaker 1: It's called It's a hat that says the abyss on it.
• 29:12
  Speaker 2: And it perfectly sized, actually works really well. This was
• 29:16
  Speaker 2: like a bodcast pressed people.
• 29:21
  Speaker 1: We look like two ginger moms supporting our sons.
• 29:27
  Speaker 4: I am so basically, my brother's schizophrenic and by or
• 29:32
  Speaker 4: bipolar and suffers from schizophrenia. And he occasionally because just
• 29:39
  Speaker 4: completely wild's out, okay, like, travels from this whatever city
• 29:44
  Speaker 4: he's living in, whether he's housed or on house, to
• 29:47
  Speaker 4: a different place.
• 29:48
  Speaker 2: You know, he's been to Alaska, New York. He's like
• 29:51
  Speaker 2: a he's like a retiree.
• 29:53
  Speaker 4: Sure, he's been to southern California, San Francisco, Portland, Seattle, Chicago, Cleveland.
• 30:01
  Speaker 4: And because he's white, he can often find ways to
• 30:06
  Speaker 4: access credit, and he can access credit.
• 30:09
  Speaker 2: And all of a suddenly he'll have a Mini Cooper, right,
• 30:12
  Speaker 2: traveling the country and the mini Cooper. So the show
• 30:17
  Speaker 2: that I.
• 30:18
  Speaker 4: Finally wrote and am working on is about my family's
• 30:26
  Speaker 4: many attempts to sort of recover him and medicate or
• 30:33
  Speaker 4: corral him back into some sort of.
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: Care right, some sort of safe environment, right.
• 30:38
  Speaker 4: And so, and I've been doing stand up for like
• 30:41
  Speaker 4: twelve years, and all of a sudden, I started like
• 30:44
  Speaker 4: trying to talk about him in my stand up and
• 30:48
  Speaker 4: it wasn't serving the material because it was like only
• 30:53
  Speaker 4: trying to make it.
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: Funny, right, you need context, and it.
• 30:56
  Speaker 2: Wasn't serving the audience.
• 30:58
  Speaker 4: Like I'd be doing like long forty five minute sets
• 31:00
  Speaker 4: and I'd be like, Okay, so for the last ten minutes,
• 31:02
  Speaker 4: I'm just going to like drop this traumatic thing that's
• 31:05
  Speaker 4: happening in my life on you, and people would be like, yeah,
• 31:09
  Speaker 4: like thanks for sharing that, but like not what I
• 31:11
  Speaker 4: was looking for. So what I finally tried to do
• 31:15
  Speaker 4: is like write something that blends theater and my stand
• 31:19
  Speaker 4: up into this story that's about my family and my
• 31:24
  Speaker 4: brother and our us collect our collective mania around his mania.
• 31:29
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: Wow, that sounds incredible, It sounds very ambitious.
• 31:33
  Speaker 4: Actually, it's it's something that I feel very nervous about, right,
• 31:40
  Speaker 4: So that's what I feel called to speak on that,
• 31:46
  Speaker 4: And so that's why I'm trying to do these festivals
• 31:50
  Speaker 4: to sort of get it into shape, to some get
• 31:53
  Speaker 4: it into a place where I can feel proud.
• 31:55
  Speaker 2: Of what it is.
• 31:56
  Speaker 1: Right, And how have you been shaping? Have you just
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: been doing shows around LA with it.
• 32:02
  Speaker 2: I have you?
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: Have you shown it publicly yet? No?
• 32:07
  Speaker 2: This will be a world premiere.
• 32:09
  Speaker 4: Okay, I've done pieces of it around town, and I've
• 32:13
  Speaker 4: done like I've done my hour, my stand up Hour,
• 32:17
  Speaker 4: which at times includes parts of this in LA and
• 32:21
  Speaker 4: New York, San Francisco, the Gay Spot Chicago, and so
• 32:28
  Speaker 4: a lot of some of the material has been like
• 32:31
  Speaker 4: changed and shifted into this theater piece, right, but other
• 32:37
  Speaker 4: other than that. Now it's a world premiere in June.
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: Well, that's amazing. And how many siblings do you have?
• 32:42
  Speaker 2: I have four? How many do you have? I have three? Okay,
• 32:45
  Speaker 2: well you've got a big time.
• 32:46
  Speaker 1: That's small for more of man, it's standard, that's bare minimum.
• 32:50
  Speaker 1: Four is if you have less than four children, people
• 32:53
  Speaker 1: are like something's happening.
• 32:56
  Speaker 4: In like infertility issues or they have an alternative fertility
• 33:01
  Speaker 4: issues or alternative swinger.
• 33:06
  Speaker 1: They're like, truly, if somebody has less than at least
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: when I was growing up in the culture, then I
• 33:11
  Speaker 1: think it may have shifted a little bit, but it
• 33:13
  Speaker 1: was like, if you have less than four children, it's
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: just like not a typical family.
• 33:17
  Speaker 2: How many siblings do your parents have?
• 33:19
  Speaker 1: My mom has three? So she has four in her family,
• 33:23
  Speaker 1: and then my dad had six. He had seven kids
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: in his family.
• 33:27
  Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, my mom is one of ten, am I
• 33:29
  Speaker 2: dad is one of six.
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: Okay, this is Catholic.
• 33:32
  Speaker 2: Catholic.
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: I mean as much does Mormons get for having huge families.
• 33:37
  Speaker 2: Catholics, especially Irish Catholics.
• 33:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because contraceptions.
• 33:41
  Speaker 2: Really, I think it was really frowned upon.
• 33:44
  Speaker 4: Yeah, but this pope seems somewhat chill on all.
• 33:48
  Speaker 2: Oh, you're biased, right, Well, he's from course still pope.
• 33:53
  Speaker 4: One thing is knowing that my grandmother who ultimately like
• 33:58
  Speaker 4: shifted towards Trump late in her life in a way
• 34:01
  Speaker 4: that was really upsetting who I grew up in Chicago,
• 34:04
  Speaker 4: her whole life would be so upset at this Chicago popes. Oh,
• 34:12
  Speaker 4: it's like a complicated sign that whatever path she was
• 34:17
  Speaker 4: on air towards the end was like.
• 34:21
  Speaker 2: Would not wouldn't have wasn't serving her right now.
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: This is I think for so many religious people, like
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: Mormons really kind of showed their ass in twenty sixteen
• 34:32
  Speaker 1: when it was like they were not going to vote
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: for Trump. Yeah, he was so against everything Mormon stood for,
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: and then they all voted for him and it's just
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: like this tension and this weird hypocrisy that really showed itself,
• 34:45
  Speaker 1: especially among older religious people. Sure, just like I don't know,
• 34:48
  Speaker 1: I no longer know who to follow my religious leader,
• 34:51
  Speaker 1: who I've sworn my life to, or wild Rose Beauty
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: or I've purchased from wild Rose Media too.
• 34:58
  Speaker 2: I bought a dress, Oh yes, I do remember that.
• 35:01
  Speaker 1: I own address from her, and Matt Rogers brought me
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: one of her products.
• 35:06
  Speaker 2: I brought some skin care for a friend as a gift.
• 35:08
  Speaker 1: And did they use it?
• 35:10
  Speaker 2: I hope.
• 35:10
  Speaker 4: So I feel like most skincare is sort of like
• 35:14
  Speaker 4: all the same, right, It's the.
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: Same basic ingredients that does nothing right.
• 35:19
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: I mean I I with Whitney Rose, I would be
• 35:22
  Speaker 1: a little.
• 35:22
  Speaker 2: Bit more afraid.
• 35:24
  Speaker 1: So I feel like she's willing to do whatever it
• 35:28
  Speaker 1: takes to get.
• 35:28
  Speaker 2: A buck, right. Well, yes, and which I wish I
• 35:33
  Speaker 2: was more like that. I had toom mentality.
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: This is something that I think most of us in
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: comedy at this point, who have kind of like controlled
• 35:45
  Speaker 1: ourselves and planted to be polite and then ultimately plateaued,
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: have looked at psychos who have shot off into the
• 35:52
  Speaker 1: atmosphere and been like now I'm like, well, I could
• 35:55
  Speaker 1: at least follow up on an email.
• 35:57
  Speaker 2: Right, I wouldn't do Oh no, this is in my sobriety.
• 36:01
  Speaker 2: I'm bothering people.
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: Yes, you have to see.
• 36:04
  Speaker 4: I feel like, even though you never drank, you should
• 36:07
  Speaker 4: just do three months in rehab to be like, my
• 36:09
  Speaker 4: mentality is all wrong. I need the like I need
• 36:14
  Speaker 4: to be set free, Like I feel so like set
• 36:17
  Speaker 4: free of alcohol that I that you need that for something.
• 36:23
  Speaker 2: You got to go to esselon.
• 36:24
  Speaker 4: Or that's not a bad idea, and you don't go
• 36:27
  Speaker 4: do ayahuasca. I feel like a lot of psychopaths are
• 36:29
  Speaker 4: like I went and did ayahuasca, and what I learned
• 36:31
  Speaker 4: is that I am the center of the universe.
• 36:34
  Speaker 1: I'm the only thing that matters to anyone exactly.
• 36:37
  Speaker 2: I learned that everyone else is a simulation.
• 36:39
  Speaker 4: And I'm in the Truman Show and you're like, okay
• 36:42
  Speaker 4: and that, and you are behaving that way.
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: And they were probably behaving that way a little bit
• 36:47
  Speaker 1: before anyway, right, Yeah, they didn't need to go ahead.
• 36:51
  Speaker 4: Right, I experienced ego death, but by being a huge
• 36:57
  Speaker 4: crazy person.
• 36:58
  Speaker 1: No, I do just literally, in the last probably six
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: to nine months have been like push a little bit. Yes,
• 37:07
  Speaker 1: you should maybe stand up for yourself on occasion you got.
• 37:11
  Speaker 2: To join like a writer's group or an actor's group.
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: That's not a bad idea.
• 37:16
  Speaker 2: Get on a zoom and everyone's just hanging so my
• 37:20
  Speaker 2: manager spin at my mouth. They are getting me out.
• 37:24
  Speaker 2: So does it feel like I should shove a banana
• 37:30
  Speaker 2: in my own ass? And everyone's like, are they signing people?
• 37:35
  Speaker 2: I've just got drop.
• 37:40
  Speaker 1: That's I mean, that's basically what we're living in right now.
• 37:44
  Speaker 1: That's essentially what we're living in outside of like fourteen
• 37:46
  Speaker 1: people who don't have to deal with it. Oh yes,
• 37:48
  Speaker 1: who built their their boats and have sailed away watching
• 37:55
  Speaker 1: the rest of us drown. Oh god, no, I.
• 37:57
  Speaker 2: Don't think I'm drowning.
• 37:58
  Speaker 4: I feel like my boat like hit in a toll
• 38:01
  Speaker 4: and I'm like, I mean my castaway moment where I'm like, all.
• 38:05
  Speaker 2: I gotta do is stay alive.
• 38:07
  Speaker 4: You know where he goes to the top and you
• 38:09
  Speaker 4: learn afterwards he's like tried to throw a body, but
• 38:12
  Speaker 4: he couldn't kill himself the way he wanted to.
• 38:14
  Speaker 1: I don't remember that part. I only saw him once
• 38:17
  Speaker 1: and it was right as I was getting strep throat.
• 38:20
  Speaker 2: Oh so you were also experiencing.
• 38:23
  Speaker 1: I remember that movie was a physical experience for me
• 38:26
  Speaker 1: because I was strep throat was gearing up to make
• 38:29
  Speaker 1: me sick. I remember being like, oh, this feels bad
• 38:31
  Speaker 1: to watch.
• 38:33
  Speaker 4: Well, I haven't seen it in years, but I feel
• 38:36
  Speaker 4: like that's kind of where I am now.
• 38:38
  Speaker 2: Okay, and the plane, the ship, it's gonna.
• 38:41
  Speaker 1: Come, It's going to come.
• 38:43
  Speaker 4: I gotta I'm just building the raft one podcast appearance.
• 38:47
  Speaker 2: At the time.
• 38:49
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I feel like I'm a little Batreon podcast experience
• 38:52
  Speaker 4: that I just did.
• 38:53
  Speaker 1: Jenny yangs oh, I love too.
• 38:56
  Speaker 2: I feel like she lives like down the pretty close.
• 38:59
  Speaker 1: And who cares where I saw? I saw She's so lovely. Well,
• 39:02
  Speaker 1: I saw it Zach and Way Towers, uh special special release.
• 39:08
  Speaker 2: Nice, she's lovely. I'm going to see Zach tonight. I'm
• 39:12
  Speaker 2: doing his show, The Best Story, one of the best.
• 39:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but yeah, this is I guess what we're all
• 39:18
  Speaker 1: kind of going through. I feel like I'm on essentially
• 39:20
  Speaker 1: a raft and so I haven't drowned, and I have
• 39:23
  Speaker 1: the ability to move, and You're beloved and I'm ultimately beloved.
• 39:30
  Speaker 2: That is simply not true.
• 39:32
  Speaker 1: I think I've really hated are you. I don't know.
• 39:35
  Speaker 1: I'm like, am I secretly hated?
• 39:37
  Speaker 2: I don't think so.
• 39:38
  Speaker 4: I would tell you if I had heard some well,
• 39:41
  Speaker 4: I've actually never heard anyone.
• 39:42
  Speaker 2: Speak ill of you. That might just be because.
• 39:44
  Speaker 4: You're not part of the conversation. I would if you're
• 39:50
  Speaker 4: not being hated, you're not part of the conversation.
• 39:53
  Speaker 2: I just learned that nobody.
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: I try to be nice to everybody, right, I try
• 39:58
  Speaker 1: to be nice and just stay in my own lane.
• 40:02
  Speaker 1: But maybe that's a bad idea.
• 40:05
  Speaker 2: I can't. I don't know.
• 40:08
  Speaker 4: I feel like sometimes in my when things are going
• 40:13
  Speaker 4: well for me, that's when I would get a little
• 40:16
  Speaker 4: like persnickety about things and like start having standards. Oh sure,
• 40:22
  Speaker 4: And now that that's not happened, Like you know, I'm
• 40:26
  Speaker 4: just a little pup.
• 40:27
  Speaker 2: I just try and just want to be told I'm
• 40:29
  Speaker 2: doing a good job. You are doing a good junk you.
• 40:33
  Speaker 2: Thank you. We're both in relationships.
• 40:35
  Speaker 1: We're both in relationships.
• 40:37
  Speaker 2: A lot of gay guys can't hold down a man.
• 40:39
  Speaker 1: That's very true.
• 40:40
  Speaker 2: I hear that all the time.
• 40:42
  Speaker 4: There's no good single men, And I'm like, maybe the
• 40:45
  Speaker 4: problem is you.
• 40:46
  Speaker 1: Maybe you haven't lowered your standards enough.
• 40:48
  Speaker 2: Exactly. No, Well you got snatched up.
• 40:52
  Speaker 1: I have a wonderful person in my life, and I
• 40:54
  Speaker 1: feel very lucky.
• 40:55
  Speaker 2: Good, and you have a wonderful person I do. I
• 40:57
  Speaker 2: have a merch maker.
• 40:58
  Speaker 1: You've got a merch maker and maker. Merchant maker, make merch.
• 41:05
  Speaker 2: Make me a hat or a tote? How does he
• 41:11
  Speaker 2: make it? He's not like a sweatshop. He's at an email.
• 41:17
  Speaker 2: He's sending emails.
• 41:18
  Speaker 1: Okay, but he knows the different manufacturers, etcetera. That's to design.
• 41:24
  Speaker 1: This is a hat.
• 41:27
  Speaker 2: I'm wearing a hat.
• 41:27
  Speaker 4: This was written, this text font was created and drawn
• 41:33
  Speaker 4: by my other brother.
• 41:35
  Speaker 2: Oh, my brother Kevin, who's an artist. Okay, so he's
• 41:38
  Speaker 2: an artist. Kevin's an artist. Kevin's an artist.
• 41:42
  Speaker 4: Brendan's a gay guy professionally. And so my my brother
• 41:49
  Speaker 4: made this. And then Joe, my partner, you know, knows
• 41:53
  Speaker 4: a hat guy.
• 41:54
  Speaker 2: Right right, Well, it worked out. It's all working out.
• 41:57
  Speaker 2: I got to make some merch for your pie. Is
• 41:59
  Speaker 2: it all boys and your fan? Two girls? Oh? Two girls,
• 42:02
  Speaker 2: two older sisters.
• 42:03
  Speaker 1: Okay, what about you.
• 42:05
  Speaker 2: I've got a younger sister and two older brothers, two
• 42:08
  Speaker 2: older brothers.
• 42:09
  Speaker 4: Right, Oh, I never had an older brother.
• 42:12
  Speaker 2: Oh, where are you in those middle middle?
• 42:15
  Speaker 1: So three of five you have three two under you?
• 42:20
  Speaker 2: Yes, two under two older? Okay? Wow? Yeah, who's the
• 42:24
  Speaker 2: baby Kevin? Who did that?
• 42:26
  Speaker 1: Are?
• 42:26
  Speaker 2: Okay? Well?
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: And as far as it's like two years between.
• 42:30
  Speaker 2: Each, like three three two or three? Interesting?
• 42:34
  Speaker 1: So there's a pretty big age gap between the oldest
• 42:36
  Speaker 1: and youngest.
• 42:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe like twelve years or something like that.
• 42:41
  Speaker 4: I can't I can't do the math right now. I
• 42:42
  Speaker 4: don't want to say how old my oldest sister is.
• 42:46
  Speaker 1: You don't want to ruin her right career because I'm
• 42:48
  Speaker 1: twelve star, how are your career?
• 42:53
  Speaker 2: Because a twenty eight year old I do feel like
• 42:54
  Speaker 2: I'm cresting.
• 42:56
  Speaker 1: But you still have two years to get thirty under
• 42:58
  Speaker 1: thirty right, and you are putting in work.
• 43:00
  Speaker 2: Oh, I'm a founder.
• 43:04
  Speaker 1: Who picks the thirty under thirty? Who what pervert? It's
• 43:08
  Speaker 1: ultimately a pervert, Yes, who's got their eye on young people?
• 43:11
  Speaker 2: I agree a some other thirty year old thirty one
• 43:15
  Speaker 2: year old who's been thirty for like fifty years? Is
• 43:18
  Speaker 2: that Forbes?
• 43:20
  Speaker 1: I think it is Forbes, And we don't think anyone
• 43:22
  Speaker 1: trusts Forbes anymore. I think Forbes is just something you
• 43:24
  Speaker 1: can like sign up like Facebook and write an article.
• 43:27
  Speaker 4: Right, Yeah, I haven't been on a list in years.
• 43:31
  Speaker 2: I should make a list, Bridgers list.
• 43:33
  Speaker 1: What's stopping me? People love to be on a list.
• 43:36
  Speaker 1: Once someone's on a list, they start promoting the list,
• 43:38
  Speaker 1: and it gives it, it makes it valid, and then
• 43:41
  Speaker 1: everyone else wants to be on the list.
• 43:42
  Speaker 4: And then all of a sudden you have an event. Yeah,
• 43:45
  Speaker 4: and it's like sponsored by am way Away Presents Bridgers List,
• 43:53
  Speaker 4: and it's called the B List.
• 43:57
  Speaker 1: Well, we should do a list. We should do that
• 44:00
  Speaker 1: B list, B list everyone wants. We should want people
• 44:04
  Speaker 1: to be on the B list.
• 44:05
  Speaker 4: People, I guess people do want to be It's the
• 44:08
  Speaker 4: same thing with like the queer teas. These are quarterly right,
• 44:12
  Speaker 4: Like how are there so many queer tea ceremonies that
• 44:15
  Speaker 4: I'm never invited to? And there's always photos and there's
• 44:19
  Speaker 4: always like best You've probably never been nominated.
• 44:22
  Speaker 1: For, not nominated, not invited to. I'm not as far
• 44:25
  Speaker 1: as i'm as I know, I'm not part of the
• 44:27
  Speaker 1: gay community, right, I don't think that I'm allowed. They've
• 44:32
  Speaker 1: built a wall up and I'm not allowed in the
• 44:33
  Speaker 1: gay community.
• 44:34
  Speaker 4: Well, I get that there's only one spot for one
• 44:38
  Speaker 4: gay ginger is you took it a long time? There's
• 44:41
  Speaker 4: this other gay redhead Dan, who's lovely. Okay, but we
• 44:47
  Speaker 4: text each other when we get appointments. Oh sure, sure,
• 44:50
  Speaker 4: are you going out for this?
• 44:52
  Speaker 1: Are you doing somebody wants a ginger right?
• 44:54
  Speaker 2: Are you doing the Scandinavian accent?
• 44:56
  Speaker 1: Oh? God, the scandal? Oh Norwegian?
• 45:02
  Speaker 2: Norwegian? Did you do that? Yes?
• 45:06
  Speaker 4: That?
• 45:06
  Speaker 1: I have to destroy that footage I sent it along.
• 45:11
  Speaker 1: I can't sing Happy Birthday.
• 45:12
  Speaker 2: I had to sing. I forgot to sing.
• 45:14
  Speaker 1: I had to sing.
• 45:16
  Speaker 2: Well, maybe you got to the second round. They didn't
• 45:18
  Speaker 2: ask me to sing. I cannot sing.
• 45:22
  Speaker 1: It was horrible.
• 45:23
  Speaker 2: You can't you just match maker match No.
• 45:25
  Speaker 1: I truly can't keep pitch like. I can't carry a tune.
• 45:29
  Speaker 2: Wow, and your partner is a musical.
• 45:32
  Speaker 1: It's horrible. It's almost abusive because when I try singing,
• 45:35
  Speaker 1: he makes fun of me. Oh god, he could. He
• 45:37
  Speaker 1: should teach me how to sing.
• 45:39
  Speaker 4: Teach me how to sing. We're just giving you other
• 45:43
  Speaker 4: podcast ideas.
• 45:44
  Speaker 1: I think we should have a podcast called the bat List.
• 45:46
  Speaker 2: I agree everybody wants to be on the list, or
• 45:50
  Speaker 2: we should.
• 45:51
  Speaker 1: At least have an annual thing wherever whoever made the
• 45:53
  Speaker 1: B list?
• 45:54
  Speaker 2: That would be fun.
• 45:55
  Speaker 4: Okay, So here's how I do feel like if it
• 45:57
  Speaker 4: was a recurring thing, we could be.
• 45:58
  Speaker 2: Like Today's so of the B list is like fast casual?
• 46:07
  Speaker 2: Who made the interesting?
• 46:09
  Speaker 4: It would be like, you know, Chili's made the B List,
• 46:14
  Speaker 4: but Friday has dropped.
• 46:17
  Speaker 1: They've made it to the D list. Wow, this is interesting.
• 46:22
  Speaker 4: But we can also do people you know that would
• 46:25
  Speaker 4: just potentially be hurting our career.
• 46:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I know this is the thing, but I'm kind
• 46:28
  Speaker 1: of ready to ready to just torpedo self sabotage in
• 46:33
  Speaker 1: a huge way. I'm ready to name it. I'm so
• 46:37
  Speaker 1: tired of protecting everyone.
• 46:39
  Speaker 4: I do feel like people are craving that sort of authenticity.
• 46:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's just who do you hate? Or I mean
• 46:45
  Speaker 2: you've seen Network, right?
• 46:47
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, of course right? And that is how this
• 46:50
  Speaker 1: Maybe I should have a Network moment where I just
• 46:52
  Speaker 1: started namingk comedians I don't like.
• 46:55
  Speaker 4: Yeah, well, I have such a lovely view of Eagle
• 46:58
  Speaker 4: Rock or wherever you live right now.
• 47:00
  Speaker 1: And we got to play a game, play a game,
• 47:04
  Speaker 1: we got into some dangerous territory.
• 47:09
  Speaker 4: Okay, so just FYI listener, we just cut about six
• 47:13
  Speaker 4: minutes of Bridger and I talking shit. And if you
• 47:18
  Speaker 4: want to hear that unfiltered, you got to come to
• 47:20
  Speaker 4: some of the live shows because that live stuff is
• 47:24
  Speaker 4: where that shit talking happens, and then it gets cut
• 47:27
  Speaker 4: in post.
• 47:28
  Speaker 1: So you don't want any of that now, Okay, Connor,
• 47:32
  Speaker 1: cut it all, listener. We had to cut a lot
• 47:34
  Speaker 1: because we said a lot of I will say horrible
• 47:37
  Speaker 1: people's names and some nice people's names.
• 47:40
  Speaker 4: Well, at a certain point, I was trying to guess
• 47:43
  Speaker 4: who Bridger thinks it is horrible, and I said some
• 47:45
  Speaker 4: nice people's names who I don't think are horrible, but
• 47:48
  Speaker 4: I think it could be reflected that, like, somewhere deep
• 47:51
  Speaker 4: in my.
• 47:51
  Speaker 2: Brain, I think you thought they were good.
• 47:53
  Speaker 1: Right, that's true, But really I'm.
• 47:55
  Speaker 2: Just trying to get to know you better.
• 47:58
  Speaker 1: What you're trying to do is talk shit.
• 48:00
  Speaker 2: You know.
• 48:00
  Speaker 4: We the first time we ever met, I think we
• 48:02
  Speaker 4: got like set up on a friend date. Somebody was like,
• 48:05
  Speaker 4: you two should know each other, and we went to Lakhma.
• 48:08
  Speaker 2: Oh my god.
• 48:08
  Speaker 1: Of course it was so nice, pre pandemic.
• 48:10
  Speaker 2: Pre them tearing down all that we should go to
• 48:12
  Speaker 2: New Life, Ah, the new it looks incredible.
• 48:15
  Speaker 1: Let's go, let's do it. Let's go see some art.
• 48:16
  Speaker 2: I hear it's fabulous.
• 48:18
  Speaker 1: Well, promote your show one more time before we play
• 48:20
  Speaker 1: the game.
• 48:20
  Speaker 4: My show, Brendan's Canal the Abyss, exploring a sinking feeling
• 48:26
  Speaker 4: is at Hollywood Fringe in La at the Broadwater in June.
• 48:30
  Speaker 4: A bunch of weird dates come to that. It's fifty
• 48:33
  Speaker 4: five minutes, such a gas. It's over before it starts.
• 48:38
  Speaker 4: And then for all your international listeners Edinburgh, I met
• 48:42
  Speaker 4: the Gilded Balloon.
• 48:43
  Speaker 3: Oh.
• 48:43
  Speaker 1: I like the sound of that at.
• 48:45
  Speaker 4: Nine to twenty pm every single day for the Longust,
• 48:50
  Speaker 4: twenty six shows in a row.
• 48:52
  Speaker 1: That is incredible.
• 48:53
  Speaker 4: Yeah, and then also be at Monkey Barrel doing improv afternoon.
• 48:57
  Speaker 2: And you're on Instagram.
• 48:59
  Speaker 1: You're on TikTok Instagram.
• 49:00
  Speaker 2: I'm on TikTok. I'm on threads. Oh are you threading? No?
• 49:04
  Speaker 1: I'm constantly saying. It's saying, here's a thread you might like.
• 49:07
  Speaker 1: I look at it. Of course it's not a thread.
• 49:08
  Speaker 1: I like. I've never had a thread that I was
• 49:10
  Speaker 1: interested in.
• 49:11
  Speaker 2: You gotta get on threads.
• 49:12
  Speaker 1: No, thank you, I'm not doing this anymore.
• 49:15
  Speaker 2: I feel like I'm doing a consultation with you.
• 49:18
  Speaker 1: I've bled enough.
• 49:19
  Speaker 4: I'm an insane woman, actress, acting teacher in LA and
• 49:24
  Speaker 4: I'm just like, what if you were Latina?
• 49:27
  Speaker 1: It's just wrowing everyone.
• 49:29
  Speaker 2: You're Latina. Diversity is huge right now, Bridge air Winnegar.
• 49:39
  Speaker 1: All right, this is how we play. We're playing a
• 49:41
  Speaker 1: game called Gift a Curse. As soon as the garbage
• 49:43
  Speaker 1: truck leaves, it is garbage day, and we love the
• 49:47
  Speaker 1: sound of trash being taken. Mm, they're moving on.
• 49:51
  Speaker 2: If trash is being taken, it means it's no longer
• 49:54
  Speaker 2: near me.
• 49:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's no longer near me.
• 49:57
  Speaker 4: Do you ever hear the trash and you realize you
• 50:01
  Speaker 4: didn't put the trash out?
• 50:02
  Speaker 1: Horrible fit And you're running there and you're waving down
• 50:07
  Speaker 1: and you're rolling it, and it's it moves slow enough
• 50:11
  Speaker 1: that you think you can catch it, but it's freaking
• 50:14
  Speaker 1: usually fast enough that you can't.
• 50:15
  Speaker 2: No, and they don't stop.
• 50:17
  Speaker 1: They don't know, they don't They shouldn't. Good for them.
• 50:19
  Speaker 2: No, they've got places to be.
• 50:22
  Speaker 1: Okay, we're going to play Gift or a Curse. I'm
• 50:24
  Speaker 1: going to name three things you'll tell me if they're
• 50:26
  Speaker 1: a gift or a curse? And why then I'll tell
• 50:28
  Speaker 1: you if you're right or wrong. Okay, correct answers?
• 50:31
  Speaker 2: All right?
• 50:31
  Speaker 1: This first one is from a listener named Antonia. Gift
• 50:35
  Speaker 1: or a curse. Cadberry cream eggs, Oh, curse? Why curse?
• 50:42
  Speaker 4: I just feel like that's like an Easter candy that's
• 50:45
  Speaker 4: year round. So I'm like, there, this is for Easter. However,
• 50:51
  Speaker 4: you're selling them a round, so a lot of them
• 50:53
  Speaker 4: are stale and weird, right, because they make them all
• 50:57
  Speaker 4: for Easter, right, all of a sudden, it's no and
• 51:00
  Speaker 4: you're eating a Cadberry egg and you're like, this, this
• 51:05
  Speaker 4: is past its date, right, And now that you're saying that,
• 51:09
  Speaker 4: let me just check what I think.
• 51:12
  Speaker 1: Aberry a Cadberry cream egg is, because I know they're
• 51:16
  Speaker 1: two different. Okay, yes, this is what I was thinking
• 51:18
  Speaker 1: it is.
• 51:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah, this is like.
• 51:20
  Speaker 4: One of those British chocolates that like British people are like, oh, I.
• 51:23
  Speaker 2: Love that, and then you have a bite of it
• 51:25
  Speaker 2: and it crumbles all over you. But you're saying curse.
• 51:29
  Speaker 2: I think curse. Correct? Thank god?
• 51:32
  Speaker 1: Oh this is I like the mini eggs. Of course,
• 51:34
  Speaker 1: everyone loves the mini egg Oh, I love a mini
• 51:37
  Speaker 1: egg Cadberry, although Cadberry has recently I think changed the recipe,
• 51:41
  Speaker 1: which is shameful. I think so too, because it was
• 51:44
  Speaker 1: a perfect candy that was a nice little treat around springtime.
• 51:48
  Speaker 1: The Cadberry cream egg is disgusting. It's designed to look
• 51:53
  Speaker 1: and feel like an egg in your mouth.
• 51:57
  Speaker 2: Regular eggs.
• 51:58
  Speaker 1: Yeah, the regular egg is kind of like you have
• 52:01
  Speaker 1: to really kind of prepare yourself mentally to eat an egg.
• 52:04
  Speaker 2: Oh, a runny egg. I mean love.
• 52:06
  Speaker 1: I will love them when I'm eating them, but I
• 52:08
  Speaker 1: can't you can't think ten seconds about what you're doing.
• 52:11
  Speaker 4: No, that I'm eating like an egg that popped out
• 52:14
  Speaker 4: of a chicken and she was in And even if
• 52:18
  Speaker 4: you bought the free range ones, they weren't really allowed
• 52:22
  Speaker 4: to roam.
• 52:22
  Speaker 1: There is a lot of scandal around, like.
• 52:24
  Speaker 2: In like Auschwitz for these fucking chickens. Yeah, and everyone
• 52:32
  Speaker 2: was free range and out farm.
• 52:35
  Speaker 1: The farmer had to run and catch it on a
• 52:36
  Speaker 1: beautiful green hill. No, it was in a dirty, filthy patch. No,
• 52:40
  Speaker 1: but a Cadbury cream egg. No one likes them. No,
• 52:45
  Speaker 1: there's simply I understand the novelty of a food looking
• 52:48
  Speaker 1: like another food. It also is kind of like the
• 52:50
  Speaker 1: patient zero for food looking like other food. You know,
• 52:53
  Speaker 1: this is how we got is it cake? Basically?
• 52:56
  Speaker 2: God, that's tracking that line.
• 52:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, all the way back. And you've got a chocolate
• 53:02
  Speaker 1: egg that looks like an egg and has a yolk
• 53:04
  Speaker 1: in the middle. Yeah, disgusting.
• 53:07
  Speaker 2: That's a curse.
• 53:08
  Speaker 1: Okay, so we've gotten one right so far. This second
• 53:11
  Speaker 1: one is from a listener named Sarah. Gift or a
• 53:14
  Speaker 1: curse the word yummy.
• 53:22
  Speaker 4: I think gift why mmm, yummy, yummy. I think you
• 53:29
  Speaker 4: can use it in a lot of ways, like picture this,
• 53:32
  Speaker 4: you've just eaten the guy's come.
• 53:36
  Speaker 2: Yummy.
• 53:37
  Speaker 4: But but also somebody walks out in a great outfit
• 53:41
  Speaker 4: yummy yummy.
• 53:44
  Speaker 2: Uh, somebody has just baked cooked for you. Oh yummy.
• 53:48
  Speaker 2: This is this is an acting exercise, yummy m oh.
• 53:55
  Speaker 4: Or like it's they've tried something new but you haven't
• 53:58
  Speaker 4: tried it yet.
• 53:59
  Speaker 2: But it sounds interesting, like, you know, like a white
• 54:02
  Speaker 2: person being like I made I made Paea. You're like, oh, yummy.
• 54:08
  Speaker 4: It can have anticipation behind it, like you can preempt.
• 54:12
  Speaker 2: Something with yummy.
• 54:13
  Speaker 3: Mm hmm.
• 54:14
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I think it's a gift, correct gift.
• 54:18
  Speaker 1: We all love saying yummy. We're all saying it constantly.
• 54:21
  Speaker 1: I'm at a restaurant, I'm perusing the menu, I'm going
• 54:23
  Speaker 1: yummy yummy. Doesn't that sound yummy? I feel like you
• 54:29
  Speaker 1: can kind of just go anywhere with it. Yummy yummy
• 54:32
  Speaker 1: in my tummy.
• 54:34
  Speaker 2: That feels cursed, that feels.
• 54:38
  Speaker 1: No. You like saying yummy yummy in my tummy, rolling
• 54:41
  Speaker 1: your window down to a stranger.
• 54:42
  Speaker 2: Yummy yummy and my tummy.
• 54:45
  Speaker 4: I think there are times when you, as a gay man,
• 54:49
  Speaker 4: are allowed to cat call other gay.
• 54:51
  Speaker 2: Men and it's not bad, right, And.
• 54:54
  Speaker 4: I think yummy yummy in my tummy is something you
• 54:57
  Speaker 4: could say. Driving through West Hollywood, me and my sixty
• 55:06
  Speaker 4: plus group of friends, we're all retired therapists, and we
• 55:11
  Speaker 4: just drive down Santamn a couple of bar going yummy yummy,
• 55:15
  Speaker 4: am I tummy.
• 55:18
  Speaker 2: Hoping some twink will get in the car and make
• 55:22
  Speaker 2: me feel whole.
• 55:24
  Speaker 1: Okay, well, you've gotten two right so far. That's pretty good.
• 55:28
  Speaker 2: Has anyone ever gone three for three? Oh?
• 55:29
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a small list. I think it's a smaller
• 55:32
  Speaker 1: list of people who have failed completely, like zero for
• 55:36
  Speaker 1: zero for three freaks. Yeah, those people really outdid themselves.
• 55:41
  Speaker 1: This final one is from a listener named Levi. Gift
• 55:44
  Speaker 1: or a Curse, splitting the bill evenly.
• 55:49
  Speaker 2: Gift Okay, I'm.
• 55:55
  Speaker 4: I guess I just feel like it all works out
• 55:57
  Speaker 4: in the wash unless you have like a friend who's like,
• 56:00
  Speaker 4: really on the.
• 56:01
  Speaker 2: Dole and the dole is you and I, Yeah, I
• 56:06
  Speaker 2: just feel like I'm down to split everything.
• 56:08
  Speaker 4: I suppose, yes, gift the thing of like, here's what
• 56:14
  Speaker 4: I had, here's what you had. I feel like the
• 56:16
  Speaker 4: person who puts their credit card down eventually ends up
• 56:19
  Speaker 4: paying more because as a country, we're not good at math,
• 56:24
  Speaker 4: and people aren't anticipating tax and tip.
• 56:28
  Speaker 1: And it's hard to start doing the percentages right.
• 56:31
  Speaker 4: Or one of your friends is like I only tip
• 56:33
  Speaker 4: eighteen percent, and then you're like.
• 56:34
  Speaker 2: Well, now I've learned that about you.
• 56:36
  Speaker 4: And it's hard for me to continue the friendship.
• 56:42
  Speaker 1: I was planning to rip off the waiter. I wasn't
• 56:44
  Speaker 1: going to give any.
• 56:45
  Speaker 2: Tips, so right, Well, I don't tip.
• 56:47
  Speaker 4: I don't believe it tips so and they have to
• 56:49
  Speaker 4: pay taxes on them, which I don't think is right.
• 56:51
  Speaker 1: So yeah, eh, so gift gift, you.
• 56:57
  Speaker 2: Think splitting it evenly I think is a gift.
• 57:00
  Speaker 4: I think it's a gift that you can give yourself
• 57:02
  Speaker 4: and your friend and the loved ones.
• 57:04
  Speaker 1: Wrong curse, no, no, no, we have as a society
• 57:10
  Speaker 1: we have to step away from this. First of all,
• 57:12
  Speaker 1: we have the tech. Every waiter has a little device
• 57:17
  Speaker 1: that can split up the bill or at least roughly.
• 57:23
  Speaker 1: Second of all people, there's always one person who goes crazy,
• 57:28
  Speaker 1: and it's usually not the person that I even wanted
• 57:30
  Speaker 1: at dinner. And so I'm like, I'm listening to order
• 57:33
  Speaker 1: and order and order, knowing I'm going to have to
• 57:35
  Speaker 1: pay for their They're insane meal.
• 57:38
  Speaker 2: They're Aaron Cheney, yes, and like.
• 57:40
  Speaker 1: Four different drinks all that make no sense with the meal.
• 57:45
  Speaker 1: I hate it. The all you could. The best you
• 57:49
  Speaker 1: can do is the person who over ordered says, I
• 57:51
  Speaker 1: do the tip that to me makes sense.
• 57:54
  Speaker 2: I guess in the gift, I'm anticipating.
• 57:58
  Speaker 1: That you dine out with on a people.
• 58:00
  Speaker 4: Right exactly, I'm anticipating that I'm not going to dinner
• 58:03
  Speaker 4: with monsters.
• 58:07
  Speaker 1: Well, you'll be supposed.
• 58:08
  Speaker 2: I feel like everything is fucking shared.
• 58:10
  Speaker 4: Now if you're going to a sit down restaurant.
• 58:12
  Speaker 1: Not at the restaurants I avoid, avoid, avoid.
• 58:15
  Speaker 2: No there's no ordering your own entrey.
• 58:18
  Speaker 1: I'm sorry.
• 58:18
  Speaker 2: If I'm in Los Angeles, I'm getting up and leaving.
• 58:21
  Speaker 1: Oh I have to share. I have to like collaborate
• 58:24
  Speaker 1: on my meal.
• 58:25
  Speaker 2: Yes, that's how it all. It's small plates, family styles, shared.
• 58:29
  Speaker 2: There's no I'm getting the chicken palm for me in
• 58:34
  Speaker 2: this town.
• 58:35
  Speaker 1: That's right here. Absolutely. There are a few types of
• 58:38
  Speaker 1: restaurants where I probably will do sharing style. At Chinese restaurants, sure,
• 58:43
  Speaker 1: Thai restaurants, so you.
• 58:46
  Speaker 2: Respect other people's cultures.
• 58:48
  Speaker 1: Ah, yes, those table not farm to table.
• 58:55
  Speaker 4: Occasionally Italian okay, see Italian, I feel like is one
• 58:59
  Speaker 4: of the places where.
• 59:00
  Speaker 2: You order your own entree.
• 59:01
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 59:02
  Speaker 2: I mean it's clar you get that, you get the
• 59:05
  Speaker 2: fatucinia fraido.
• 59:07
  Speaker 1: Right, But at an Italian restaurant, I can see myself
• 59:10
  Speaker 1: someone having a big thing of pasta, but I've got
• 59:12
  Speaker 1: more of a protein. So I'm like, let's split it
• 59:14
  Speaker 1: a little bit.
• 59:15
  Speaker 2: So maybe you would split the bill as a gift.
• 59:19
  Speaker 2: We would figure it out in the honest way. You're
• 59:22
  Speaker 2: not like each getting a Spamoni.
• 59:25
  Speaker 1: I love a Spamona, of course.
• 59:28
  Speaker 2: Okay, Well you've got two out of three, Okay, I'll
• 59:30
  Speaker 2: take that. I don't want to be three for three.
• 59:32
  Speaker 1: No, you like a little rough edge.
• 59:34
  Speaker 2: That should be my own personal right.
• 59:36
  Speaker 1: Right, let's answer a listener question or two. Let's see
• 59:41
  Speaker 1: here the garbage truck is now, it's kind of it's revenge.
• 59:44
  Speaker 1: It's on the other side of the street. Let's see here.
• 59:49
  Speaker 1: We've got to have a decent question here.
• 59:52
  Speaker 2: There's some narrow streets around here too.
• 59:54
  Speaker 1: Oh my life side swiped a neighbor.
• 59:56
  Speaker 2: Well, I can't imagine. You're a good driver, thank you,
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 2: thank you for saying a little old lady behind the
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 2: wheel of like a white car.
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 1: But there are narrow streets and parking on both sides
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 1: makes things tricky.
• 1:00:16
  Speaker 2: Do you have a sedan or a hatchback?
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 1: I have like a crossover.
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 2: Ish thing, like a small suv.
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 1: It's like a Have you seen the Ionic five? Do
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 1: you know what that is?
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 2: Yes? Oh dai, yes, you walked past.
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 1: It in the driveway. It had the thing on it right,
• 1:00:36
  Speaker 1: slathered in commala.
• 1:00:37
  Speaker 4: Kamala, Biden, We did it, Joe, all of it?
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 1: Tim Tim who was Oh no, Tim Waltz, Tim Waltz different, Tim.
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 1: Jim Kaine is a true dud, right he was Hillaries,
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 1: and he was like, a what were we thinking? This
• 1:00:59
  Speaker 1: guy is a nothing?
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 2: I think that that's kind of what you want in
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 2: a VP these days.
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 1: But Tim, and is it Waltz? How I've already forgotten?
• 1:01:09
  Speaker 2: This is horror? Tim wants.
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 4: He's kind of like the old He's great, like a
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 4: old little like character from The Borrowers or something.
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 1: I really liked him. He was He's a pretty straightforward person.
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 1: He also loved Crazy Taxi on the Dreamcast. He loved
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 1: playing the game Crazy Taxi, which really endeared him to me,
• 1:01:31
  Speaker 1: especially as somebody who like.
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 2: Wow, what a deep pull on the Dreamcast.
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so I appreciated that. But we have to answer.
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 1: Let's answer one question here, and let's see this. As
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 1: you arrived to a pot luck neighborhood holiday party. What
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 1: have you brought? And what are you hoping will be there?
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 1: That's from Megan.
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 2: What if I brought and what if I hoping will
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 2: be there? I make a pretty good key lime pie.
• 1:01:56
  Speaker 1: Oh that's a nice thing.
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 4: Yeah, and it doesn't require you to anything. It doesn't
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 4: require an oven.
• 1:02:03
  Speaker 2: You're not even the Graham Cracker.
• 1:02:06
  Speaker 4: Well, it's made ahead of time. Oh, it's like everything's
• 1:02:09
  Speaker 4: made in my house. Right, it's put in a fridge
• 1:02:12
  Speaker 4: so it's chilled. So it's a rive chill that gets
• 1:02:14
  Speaker 4: put in the fridge or freezer until they bring up
• 1:02:18
  Speaker 4: the dessert. Right, Because at a potluck, a curse is
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 4: bringing something. He just needs a little bit of time
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 4: in the oven and it just needs ten to fifteen.
• 1:02:28
  Speaker 1: Then that person didn't do their job. They've created a
• 1:02:31
  Speaker 1: new job.
• 1:02:31
  Speaker 4: Unless you're like, I know, we're going to Tim and Nancy's.
• 1:02:35
  Speaker 4: They have an enormous mansion.
• 1:02:38
  Speaker 2: With with a.
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 4: Butler kitchen where we can throw it in there, right,
• 1:02:42
  Speaker 4: and there's going to be staffed.
• 1:02:44
  Speaker 1: They've got several underpaid employees.
• 1:02:46
  Speaker 4: Of course that they're paying cash who will be there.
• 1:02:50
  Speaker 4: So it's fine. We can bring.
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 2: The mastacholi to be what'soli? Maybe that's a Midwestern thing.
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 2: It's like penne. It's like a lasagna, but with penne
• 1:03:03
  Speaker 2: maasta choli?
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 1: Okay, oh pasta choli.
• 1:03:07
  Speaker 2: Pasta choli. And so that's what I can bring. And
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 2: what am I hoping is there? I love chicken salad.
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 1: Oh interesting, a mayo base, Oh yeah.
• 1:03:20
  Speaker 4: Okay, but with grapes and walnuts, right, an walnut.
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 2: Chicken, A well made one.
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 4: You can put it on a cracker, you can make
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 4: your own note sandwich out of it. You can bring
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 4: with a tupperware, steal some of it, put it in
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 4: your car, eat it on the hot car until.
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 2: You're ready to go. Well, I parked in the shade.
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 1: Oh, of course, on their lawn. I need to get
• 1:03:44
  Speaker 1: into chicken salad. Maybe that's my problem.
• 1:03:46
  Speaker 2: Not enough protein.
• 1:03:48
  Speaker 1: It's the mayo, and it's not like mayo. I don't
• 1:03:52
  Speaker 1: mind mayo. I love mustard, you do. I don't mind
• 1:03:56
  Speaker 1: mayo on a sandwich or whatever. But when it's like goofy,
• 1:03:59
  Speaker 1: it's on stage, the spotlight's on mayo, it's a little
• 1:04:02
  Speaker 1: hard for me to deal with.
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 2: Hm. I get that. What about you?
• 1:04:07
  Speaker 1: I would bring? I kind of only can bring cookies. Sure,
• 1:04:10
  Speaker 1: their showstoppers.
• 1:04:12
  Speaker 2: Are you baking them?
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 1: Baking buying them and baking them? People are going nuts?
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 2: Are you going and and they're gluten free?
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 1: No, but I should get into gluten free because you
• 1:04:21
  Speaker 1: know we've gotten we've got gluten free people. Of course,
• 1:04:24
  Speaker 1: but it's hard to I had, actually, speaking of Chicago,
• 1:04:26
  Speaker 1: had the one of the best chocolate chip cookies in
• 1:04:28
  Speaker 1: my entire life, gluten free at Unfortunately I can't remember
• 1:04:32
  Speaker 1: the name of the bakery.
• 1:04:33
  Speaker 2: Gluten free. It's not fucking around. And here's often what's
• 1:04:36
  Speaker 2: in gluten free cookies, Just like more fat. Oh yeah,
• 1:04:40
  Speaker 2: like a lot of butter beam cheese.
• 1:04:43
  Speaker 1: Maybe some nuts hold it together. So I would bring
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 1: a chocolate chip cookies.
• 1:04:49
  Speaker 4: I said fat in a good way, Like I'm not
• 1:04:52
  Speaker 4: saying like they make you fat.
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 2: I'm saying like.
• 1:04:55
  Speaker 1: It's got a nice rich exactly butterinus to it. It's
• 1:04:58
  Speaker 1: held together by crisco.
• 1:05:01
  Speaker 2: Coconut oil. There we go.
• 1:05:03
  Speaker 1: Although coconut coconut oil or like using it for vegan things,
• 1:05:07
  Speaker 1: I'm not into it. Find a different substitute because then
• 1:05:10
  Speaker 1: all I taste.
• 1:05:11
  Speaker 2: Is coconut coke. That's true.
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 1: What I'm hoping will be there will be like a
• 1:05:15
  Speaker 1: nice summary salad with a crisp.
• 1:05:19
  Speaker 4: Green That's a problem sometimes with summer salads because they
• 1:05:23
  Speaker 4: have fruit, like if they got a strawberry pretty quick.
• 1:05:28
  Speaker 1: So I like something, you know, I like it's a
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 1: good slaw, but not a mayo based a vinegar based
• 1:05:34
  Speaker 1: interesting law, like what they've got red and green cabbage.
• 1:05:38
  Speaker 1: You have vinegar, olive oil, a crunchy like a nut.
• 1:05:43
  Speaker 1: Maybe a ciche type thing.
• 1:05:46
  Speaker 2: Oh like a crowd.
• 1:05:47
  Speaker 1: Oh interesting, now, like a crouch, a crowd or a
• 1:05:50
  Speaker 1: pickled thing is more of I need that to go
• 1:05:52
  Speaker 1: with a meat or something. I should just throw that
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 1: on a plate.
• 1:05:55
  Speaker 2: Forget it.
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 1: But a slaw, summer slaw. I'm into it. I think
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 1: we answered that really beautiful way. We were both very honest.
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 2: Well, it's about to be the season of potlucks.
• 1:06:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's true, so everybody's got to start thinking about
• 1:06:09
  Speaker 1: what they'll bring. Well, I've got my hat.
• 1:06:13
  Speaker 2: It looks great.
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 1: It's a good hat, and it's nice because it's not
• 1:06:16
  Speaker 1: obvious merch.
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 2: Right, it's just more of a mindset.
• 1:06:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a mindset. You want to be there, you
• 1:06:22
  Speaker 1: want to be in the And then, of course I
• 1:06:25
  Speaker 1: have the joker who we love.
• 1:06:29
  Speaker 4: Do you just have Do you just immediately donate all
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 4: the stuff that is brought to you?
• 1:06:34
  Speaker 2: Like that must be it?
• 1:06:35
  Speaker 1: No, your house, my garage full of things. Fortunately we
• 1:06:39
  Speaker 1: have the studio now where I leave a lot of
• 1:06:41
  Speaker 1: things to just be used basically as set deck and
• 1:06:44
  Speaker 1: live shows I give things away.
• 1:06:45
  Speaker 2: Oh yes, I remember that.
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 1: And listener, I'm so sorry that we haven't done more
• 1:06:48
  Speaker 1: live shows. Recently, I'm depressed. Depressed. It's not entirely depression,
• 1:06:56
  Speaker 1: but that's definitely playing into me responding to emails at venues.
• 1:07:01
  Speaker 4: I think we should do a live show called the
• 1:07:03
  Speaker 4: B List, and basically we just oh at once a.
• 1:07:06
  Speaker 2: Year we you know, like kind of annoying different things
• 1:07:11
  Speaker 2: that get the be get the B make the B List.
• 1:07:14
  Speaker 1: We should start thinking about that for maybe early November,
• 1:07:20
  Speaker 1: far away, but it's gonna be the end of the year.
• 1:07:22
  Speaker 2: It's true.
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 4: Yes, the twenty twenty six B List, that might be
• 1:07:27
  Speaker 4: a thing that we do, might be a thing, an
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 4: alternative source of revenue for us.
• 1:07:32
  Speaker 1: Yes, we've got to find as many.
• 1:07:33
  Speaker 2: As possible sponsorship.
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 1: We could stream it right, and we could really you know,
• 1:07:39
  Speaker 1: because people are dying to be on a list.
• 1:07:41
  Speaker 2: I agree. It's basically it's all about being on the list.
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 1: Imagine people campaigning to get on our list.
• 1:07:47
  Speaker 2: I would love that for you can make videos.
• 1:07:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, this is something that we're putting out there.
• 1:07:53
  Speaker 4: If you want to see the B List, comment and
• 1:07:56
  Speaker 4: subscribe and keep giving you the Patreon find me on Instagram,
• 1:08:00
  Speaker 4: come to my show. Yes by Oh if you don't
• 1:08:04
  Speaker 4: live in Hollywood sorry or Edinburgh, you can in the
• 1:08:10
  Speaker 4: next by the time this is out. Yes, you can
• 1:08:13
  Speaker 4: buy a merch. You can buy merch for me. I
• 1:08:16
  Speaker 4: will go towards my journey to Scotland.
• 1:08:18
  Speaker 2: Oh perfect, Right, I've.
• 1:08:20
  Speaker 4: Got tots, I've got sweatshirts, and I've got hats, a
• 1:08:24
  Speaker 4: good looking hat.
• 1:08:25
  Speaker 2: Right, you can have the same hat as Bridger.
• 1:08:30
  Speaker 1: Well, thank you for being here.
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 2: It's has been so nice.
• 1:08:33
  Speaker 1: I adore you. And listener, the podcast is just kind
• 1:08:37
  Speaker 1: of over. It's uh, we're slowly kind of just running
• 1:08:40
  Speaker 1: out of gas, so I'm gonna let you go. I'm sorry. Yeah,
• 1:08:44
  Speaker 1: you didn't get to hear us gossiping.
• 1:08:47
  Speaker 2: Had a great time driving or cooking.
• 1:08:49
  Speaker 1: Whatever you were doing, doing your laundry, folding laundry, avoiding
• 1:08:53
  Speaker 1: your spouse, all kind.
• 1:08:56
  Speaker 4: Of seeing in a little fight, just cooling off, ready
• 1:08:59
  Speaker 4: to re enter the conversation, apologize, speak on why you
• 1:09:05
  Speaker 4: were feeling the way you were feeling, and hope that
• 1:09:08
  Speaker 4: they hear you.
• 1:09:09
  Speaker 2: Beautiful, I love you.
• 1:09:11
  Speaker 1: Goodbye.