Latest / The Chris and Mike Show / #173 - Matt Ferrell - Comedian

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#173 - Matt Ferrell - Comedian · The Chris and Mike Show

• 0:07
  Welcome YouTube and Twitchers. That's Chris Dunham.
• 0:13
  That's Matt Fair 1 funny motherfucker.
• 0:57
  What? Was that for silliness?
• 1:01
  Hey, welcome to the Christian, my show.
• 1:05
  He's Mike. I'm Chris.
• 1:06
  The portion of the show is watched by Riverside FM, the one
• 1:09
  and only choice for your podcast platforms.
• 1:12
  Remember, we are live on Twitch, YouTube and streaming directly
• 1:14
  on our website that Chris and mikeshow.com.
• 1:16
  And we have the world famous the funny man, ladies and gentlemen,
• 1:19
  Mr. Matt Farrell. No pressure.
• 1:22
  Welcome back. No pressure.
• 1:25
  I googled you, I googled you and and something came up at at
• 1:29
  Peacock comedy special or is that some other Matt Farrell?
• 1:33
  Yeah, no, that's me. My Peacock comedy is a a deal
• 1:36
  that I started a while back and it was, I was trying to build
• 1:40
  basically like a comedy production company so that I
• 1:42
  could produce shows for other people.
• 1:45
  And then I started I real quick, I learned how big of a pain in
• 1:48
  the ass it is to deal with other people.
• 1:51
  So I just started using my Peacock comedy to produce all my
• 1:53
  own shit. Cool.
• 1:55
  Right on. Smart move.
• 1:57
  The cool thing about that is Peacock is now synonymous with
• 2:00
  NBC slash streaming Peacock. So I was like, holy shit, that's
• 2:05
  a Peacock. Have you?
• 2:08
  Have you? Did you see the logo for it?
• 2:14
  Did I freeze Mike? Because oh, he froze up.
• 2:17
  Mike. No, you froze up on us.
• 2:22
  Can you hear me? Am I frozen?
• 2:24
  I think he froze up on us, Matt. Can you hear me?
• 2:26
  Matt. Yeah, I can hear you.
• 2:27
  Chris is froze. OK, we're good.
• 2:30
  Did. He freeze.
• 2:31
  Did I freeze? He'll have to log out and log
• 2:34
  back in if he doesn't come back. Am I?
• 2:37
  Good am I good you? Can hey.
• 2:42
  Yeah, you. So anyway, I did not see the
• 2:47
  logo. When he comes back, I'm going to
• 2:49
  have him pull it up and share it with everybody so that they can
• 2:52
  see it. But until he does that, first
• 2:54
  and foremost, Matt, thank you so much for helping us get over the
• 2:59
  top on Facebook. Man, that was awesome.
• 3:01
  That came out of nowhere. Yeah, man, that was he.
• 3:08
  He just text me and asked am I frozen?
• 3:10
  Yeah. Yes, you are.
• 3:12
  Yeah, he probably can hear everything we're saying.
• 3:15
  Yeah, yeah, that was a man I saw.
• 3:17
  I saw one of y'all had posted and said, hey, we're almost to
• 3:20
  1000, help us get there. And I was coming hit and jump on
• 3:22
  this. And you know I can only invite
• 3:25
  1000 people at a time on Facebook.
• 3:29
  Understand that it just. And then the next day I invited
• 3:32
  another thousand. And then the next day, I think
• 3:34
  if I don't before it originally let me invite 600, I don't know.
• 3:38
  But every day I get on there and I go ahead and totally invite as
• 3:40
  many people as I can. Totally appreciate it man.
• 3:46
  Yeah, so he said. Logged out.
• 3:48
  Continue. I'll be right back after these.
• 3:51
  Messages, don't worry. Yeah, we're we're, we're good.
• 3:55
  This is 100 and I think 7273. I've sat down and done this.
• 3:59
  I got her all under control now. You got to figure it out now.
• 4:03
  That's what I was going to go it looks like.
• 4:05
  What did y'all wind up getting up to over the last?
• 4:08
  Over 1100, almost 1200 now. Hell yeah.
• 4:13
  And then and then for your followers, I've gone back and,
• 4:16
  you know, looked and if they're in comedy or they're a musician
• 4:19
  or whatever, I've, you know, reciprocated and followed them.
• 4:22
  So it's just a chain of fact, man.
• 4:25
  Like you said, it's all about the grind.
• 4:27
  We've been doing this for what, 2 1/2 years now?
• 4:31
  So it, like Chris said, it's all organic.
• 4:34
  You know, we didn't go out and buy those followers.
• 4:36
  What warm my heart, man. Was it?
• 4:40
  We haven't talked to you in two or three months or whatever.
• 4:42
  I don't know how long it's been. It just showed me that you
• 4:46
  enjoyed your time here. You know, you've been following
• 4:48
  us. We appreciate the fact that
• 4:52
  somebody liked what somebody liked the time they had on here
• 4:55
  so much that, you know, you reciprocated that.
• 4:58
  So it means a lot to me, man, personally, and I know it means
• 5:01
  a lot to Chris. I was just like, wow, man, I
• 5:03
  enjoyed having you on here. I thought you were a cool
• 5:05
  fucker. You're funny, motherfucker.
• 5:07
  I follow all your stuff. I say that affectionately,
• 5:11
  ladies and gentlemen, I'm not offending the man.
• 5:13
  That's the kind of comedy he does, and I appreciate that.
• 5:15
  Comedy. So yeah.
• 5:17
  Speaking of the language. Yeah, yeah.
• 5:20
  No, man, I appreciate. And I think like everybody's got
• 5:23
  it. If everybody would do that,
• 5:25
  everybody would grow, you know, if we would all like go and
• 5:29
  invite and go and invite all your friends to follow, you
• 5:31
  know, somebody else that, you know, try and make it, invite
• 5:34
  them to follow their page and whatever.
• 5:35
  So and. Because we're talking about that
• 5:38
  real quick. Because we're talking about
• 5:41
  that, Matt, real quick. Explain to people how they do
• 5:44
  that. You know if you have a business
• 5:46
  or a page or how do you help reciprocate that for other
• 5:49
  people? Yeah, I mean the best thing you
• 5:52
  do like on most of like on Facebook, it's real easy.
• 5:54
  The three little dots, you click on that and it says invite
• 5:57
  friends and followers. You just go and click on that
• 5:59
  and it'll give you the option to like, I don't know if it's the
• 6:02
  same one. Everybody's mind will only let
• 6:04
  me invite 1000. At a time. 5.
• 6:07
  Thousand. Yeah, I just click invite 1000,
• 6:10
  send it, and then the next day I do it again.
• 6:12
  I mean, it takes, it takes 4 seconds of your time to invite
• 6:16
  all your followers to follow somebody else.
• 6:18
  Yeah, it's free. And who knows, somebody in my
• 6:23
  realm over here might think that you guys are the bee's knees.
• 6:28
  Y'all are the greatest and they wouldn't have seen y'all had had
• 6:31
  I not suggested it. Or vice versa.
• 6:33
  If y'all invite somebody like my page, you know the the people in
• 6:36
  y'all sphere where y'all are at, They're not going to find me
• 6:39
  unless y'all show them. So true to Matt's point, true to
• 6:41
  Matt's point right here, here's here's the page.
• 6:44
  Whatever your business page is, those 3 little dots you just
• 6:46
  talked about click on that invite people to connect and you
• 6:51
  just click that and it's going to it's going to switch to me
• 6:54
  because it wants it wants to go to my profile because that's why
• 6:57
  I'll invite my friends, but it's.
• 6:59
  You can't do it from a page, you have to do it from a.
• 7:02
  Profile, but it's so that's the simplest way to do it.
• 7:04
  You just find those little dots and you share and we will
• 7:06
  reciprocate that, Matt, because that was cool because that was
• 7:10
  out of nowhere when we saw that and you helped us push that
• 7:12
  thousand threshold, which was super cool.
• 7:14
  So and you know. That's what I told him.
• 7:18
  Yeah, absolutely. I'm glad you guys had a
• 7:20
  conversation without me. I appreciate that.
• 7:22
  Stupid cocks. Stupid cocks.
• 7:23
  No, I just, you'll appreciate this.
• 7:27
  Here's what I told him. It it came out of nowhere.
• 7:29
  And it showed us that he enjoyed his time so much here that he
• 7:33
  felt compelled to help us push ourselves over the top.
• 7:36
  It's just, you never know what happens after the fact, right?
• 7:40
  We don't hear you talk about your time on this show.
• 7:43
  Just like you said, nobody would have found you without us and
• 7:45
  nobody would have found us without you.
• 7:48
  We don't hear what you're saying behind the scenes, right?
• 7:51
  You could have been like that was a dud.
• 7:55
  Well, and the and the nice and the nice thing, just so people
• 7:58
  understand, we didn't ask Matt to do that.
• 8:01
  And we were talking about having Matt on the show prior to me
• 8:04
  making that post that hey, we're at 985 followers.
• 8:07
  So Matt just took that upon himself to do that.
• 8:09
  So it wasn't like, hey, dude, do us a solid.
• 8:10
  We'll do you a solid. I mean, it is a good old.
• 8:12
  It is the world is a good old boy network.
• 8:14
  But Matt just did that because Matt's a super cool guy with a
• 8:18
  nice life resume and a super nice heart.
• 8:19
  So you know, it's Joe Cocker says the best get by with a
• 8:23
  little help from my friends so. That.
• 8:27
  Was cool. So let's talk about Matt Farrell
• 8:30
  comedy. Now let's talk about what you've
• 8:31
  done since last time you were here where you're what's what's
• 8:33
  coming up for you? Any specials, any things, any
• 8:36
  shows, all that kind of stuff, man material?
• 8:39
  I usually take, I kind of, I kind of take off.
• 8:43
  I slow down during the winter time cup.
• 8:45
  I'm a pussy and I don't like driving in bad weather.
• 8:48
  That's probably. Good though.
• 8:48
  I mean, just just, yeah, of course I shouldn't this year.
• 8:52
  I should have gone ahead and booked shows all the way through
• 8:54
  December and halfway through January because the weather was
• 8:57
  beautiful here and now we're covered in ice and I've got a
• 9:00
  about a three hour drive to get to my show tonight.
• 9:03
  So and see bad. Timing, but it is what it is.
• 9:06
  And in Arizona, just so you know, we've had the warmest
• 9:08
  January on record. We're either went from either 2°
• 9:12
  to 10° above normal. Only three days this month were
• 9:16
  we below normal. That's it.
• 9:20
  And we haven't been above freezing in almost two weeks.
• 9:23
  Now, now historically though, and this is so not comedy
• 9:26
  related, which we got to stop that shit.
• 9:28
  When we talk to you, February will be super cold for some
• 9:31
  stupid reason because we, we, we're going to coast through
• 9:33
  January. And if my memory serves right,
• 9:34
  February is just going to be stupid cold.
• 9:37
  And then that's it. That's that's winter.
• 9:39
  And then spring starts in March. And yeah, you know, summer
• 9:42
  starts in May and then fuck you starts in July and August and
• 9:45
  then, you know, we're back down again in, in October.
• 9:48
  So. Man, and it seem it seems so
• 9:50
  weird. It feel here where I'm at in
• 9:53
  Oklahoma, it feels like our seasons are slowly swapping ends
• 9:56
  of the year. My my birthday is in May OK, my
• 9:59
  birthday is in May. I want to say for the last four
• 10:01
  years I've been wearing a jacket on my birthday, my birthday.
• 10:04
  I mean, it's just hadn't been cold, but it's still been cool,
• 10:08
  you know? Yep, I agree with you Matt.
• 10:10
  The colder part is becoming the end of January, end of February
• 10:14
  when we used to have wicked winters like around Christmas
• 10:17
  time. Now it's warm.
• 10:19
  It was almost 60° here at Christmas time this year.
• 10:22
  Do do. You do?
• 10:23
  Yeah, it was sunshine. I mean, there were.
• 10:25
  It was shorts and T-shirts on Christmas.
• 10:27
  Yeah, here too, but it always is.
• 10:29
  It's actually it's just underwear outside, nothing else
• 10:32
  in Arizona. I made a video one year.
• 10:36
  I made a video one year. Where where where like the IT
• 10:39
  was two or three years ago where the East Coast was just just
• 10:41
  getting pounded with weather. I was outside in my work pants.
• 10:46
  I wear I had a red a red garbage bucket with a shovel.
• 10:50
  I was shoveling sunshine. That was a great, I love that
• 10:54
  video. You know, because.
• 10:55
  Shoveling sunshine. So.
• 10:58
  It's like another rough winner in Arizona.
• 11:00
  So Mike and I want to be the first to wish you a happy
• 11:02
  birthday in May. You know, happy birthday in May.
• 11:06
  I mean wait, wait to be ahead of the.
• 11:08
  Church, you know we try to be. Absolutely.
• 11:10
  So. Happy birthday.
• 11:12
  Happy birthday. Yeah, yeah, man, Let's I, I'll
• 11:19
  tell you. We'll go into this.
• 11:21
  My wife. I'm I'm what my wife lovingly
• 11:23
  refers to as a dumb ass. I've I've given her lots of
• 11:29
  reasons for that, but probably one of the main reasons is
• 11:31
  because team we've got me. Is it?
• 11:33
  Have y'all been gut by Teemo? Yeah, no, but I've heard hold
• 11:37
  on, go ahead couple times I. Have yeah, well, it happened to
• 11:41
  me. I was scrolling on Facebook and
• 11:43
  the ad popped up and said all you got to do is download the
• 11:45
  app and we'll send you a 353 piece socket set.
• 11:48
  And I'm a sucker for tools, so I went and downloaded the app
• 11:51
  socket sets on the way. But while I was there, it said,
• 11:53
  hey, if you'll, if you'll spin this wheel, we'll give you a
• 11:57
  chance to win three more free items.
• 11:58
  And I was like, well, God damn, Now we're in a casino.
• 12:00
  I can't leave now. So I get those items on the way.
• 12:03
  And then it gives me the option and say, hey, if you'll just
• 12:05
  spend $90.00, we'll give you $120.00 worth of shit.
• 12:08
  And I'm like, well, if my wife's gonna walk away from the
• 12:09
  bargain, why should I? So about $1500 later I was
• 12:14
  checking out AT Move and this generic ass shit starts coming
• 12:20
  in. The first thing came do was this
• 12:21
  free socket scent. They offered me 53 piece socket
• 12:24
  scent and it will conveniently fit in your back pocket.
• 12:27
  I. Don't.
• 12:30
  Know this? We're working on eyeglasses or
• 12:31
  what? But you can't change the pedals
• 12:33
  on your kids bicycle. I can tell you that.
• 12:36
  The next thing I got was I ordered one of those things you
• 12:39
  wear in your stomach. It shocks you so you can get ABS
• 12:41
  without having to work out. I I know that they're not going
• 12:44
  to work, but it's fun watching my kids wear it and twitch while
• 12:47
  they walk around the house, you know, I mean, it's got enough in
• 12:49
  it for that. So it's just quality
• 12:51
  entertainment. Probably the last thing I
• 12:55
  ordered from them was. Have.
• 12:59
  You seen the ads for the T Moon Cologne?
• 13:01
  No. No Cupid Cologne.
• 13:03
  No ads for Cupid Cologne. I have not.
• 13:05
  It's the clone. It's got pheromones in it.
• 13:06
  It's supposed to help attract women.
• 13:09
  Well, I've seen it ad for I saw ad for it before, and there's
• 13:12
  this guy spraining all his wrists and letting women smell
• 13:14
  it as they walk down the street to get their reaction.
• 13:17
  This guy sprays it and this woman smells it.
• 13:18
  She goes I want to suck your Dick.
• 13:21
  God damn I need that alone. Of course I think they got the
• 13:26
  pheromones mixed up in mind because my wife don't give a
• 13:28
  shit. I'm not just blown, but her dog
• 13:30
  won't jump in my legs so I mean. It does work.
• 13:40
  You know it's funny when your face.
• 13:41
  That was good. I told you I like stand up
• 13:45
  comedy as much as I like music, man.
• 13:49
  I get in trouble, I get in trouble with with stuff online
• 13:52
  all the time because they these dumb ads pop up for shit all the
• 13:55
  time and I can't help it. I've got to click on them and
• 13:57
  see what it is I saw there was an ad for.
• 14:01
  I spend most time on Facebook I guess because I'm old, but I saw
• 14:06
  an ad probably was for a sex swing that hangs on your door.
• 14:10
  I've seen those. And I was like, I've.
• 14:12
  Seen those as? Well, let me check this out.
• 14:13
  So I click on it and it says that it's rated for £350.
• 14:17
  Yeah, now I want to, I want to inquire with the company and go
• 14:21
  who's putting 350 in a sex wing that's not comfortable for
• 14:24
  nobody. But secondly, doesn't part of
• 14:28
  that weight limit depend on which door you use?
• 14:30
  I would think so. Right.
• 14:31
  And my house we're going to we're going to use the front
• 14:34
  door, back door. There's only two solid doors.
• 14:35
  I got use one of these hollow Corey interior doors that some
• 14:38
  bitch is coming down. They ain't holding 350, I
• 14:40
  promise. Now let me let me point out you
• 14:42
  missed the prime opportunity about the back door comment
• 14:45
  because that's what she said. Yeah, there you go.
• 14:49
  OK, well, we we went ahead and ordered one and we chose to hang
• 14:54
  it on the front door and we turned it into the game.
• 14:56
  Right before we get started, I order pizza.
• 14:58
  Are you going to finish in time or make a new friend?
• 15:04
  One or the other. Yeah, well, if you time it
• 15:11
  right, because most pizza delivery companies will tell you
• 15:13
  their time frame when they're going to arrive.
• 15:15
  So if you time it right, you just, you just put you, you get
• 15:17
  started about 10 minutes out and then you know then when they
• 15:21
  come to knock on the door. They say 30 minutes or less, and
• 15:24
  that's way more time than. I need.
• 15:26
  I was thinking, I was thinking of the Home Alone scene only
• 15:30
  pornographic style, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 15:34
  Leave the pizza on the door, you filthy animal.
• 15:36
  Leave the pizza at the door. Keep the change you filthy
• 15:40
  animal. Filthy animal.
• 15:41
  So dude, I saw an ad pop up, I saw a deal pop up the other day
• 15:45
  saying how old That movie's like like 35 years old.
• 15:50
  Yeah, something. Or something like that.
• 15:51
  Now I'm like, holy geez. Yeah, yeah, that's crazy.
• 15:56
  Yeah, now he's come out saying, you know, if you see me with my
• 15:59
  family, you see me eating food, leave me alone.
• 16:03
  Otherwise, I'm approachable, which I thought was cool.
• 16:06
  You know, set the boundaries. I think that's very respectful.
• 16:09
  Why bother somebody when they're.
• 16:10
  Set the boundaries man, I saw. I've I've had the opportunity to
• 16:15
  go ahead. No, I, I just, I saw this thing
• 16:17
  about Harrison Ford. He was in New York City and he's
• 16:19
  old and he's walking with this bag, You know, he's doing this
• 16:21
  thing. And then obviously people
• 16:23
  recognize it's Harrison Ford. And we've talked about this
• 16:26
  before, Mike and I, with other guests who have some level of
• 16:29
  notoriety. It wouldn't take that long for
• 16:31
  Harrison Ford just to stop, smile, and then move on.
• 16:33
  But instead, he's being a Dick and he's not looking at anybody.
• 16:35
  He's just, you know, leave me alone, leave me alone, leave me
• 16:38
  alone. And all that does is make
• 16:41
  everybody think, well, Harrison Ford's a Dick because it wasn't
• 16:44
  a crowd. It just somebody saw him walk
• 16:46
  across the street. So you see the cell phone and
• 16:48
  there's a guy trying. Guy got his cell phone.
• 16:50
  Now, the guy didn't ask permission.
• 16:51
  I would have asked permission, right?
• 16:52
  But the guy didn't ask permission.
• 16:53
  But he's trying to do this with Harrison Ford.
• 16:55
  So Harrison's just ducking the thing.
• 16:57
  But if the dude would have been like, can I take a selfie real
• 16:59
  quick? I would think Harrison Ford be
• 17:00
  like, OK, but you know how he did it?
• 17:03
  He just makes himself look like a total ass.
• 17:05
  Your way you are. Because people go to your
• 17:07
  movies, right? Yeah, it's right. 30 seconds out
• 17:12
  of your day. People should be respectful.
• 17:13
  If you see somebody out, yeah, you see somebody out with their
• 17:16
  family or whatever, like give them some space or if they're
• 17:19
  eating. But yeah, other than that, like
• 17:21
  you make your living off of public opinion, you might, you
• 17:25
  might want to give him a good opinion, Right, Right.
• 17:28
  Here's a real. Quick, I got the opportunity to
• 17:30
  go and I went and opened for David Techner, which is.
• 17:33
  Yeah, I. Know he was on the office.
• 17:35
  Yep, he was the he was the sports guy on Anchorman.
• 17:40
  Yes, yes. Yeah.
• 17:43
  So I went, right? Yeah.
• 17:45
  So I went, I got to go and open for him and I did a whole
• 17:48
  weekend with him in Arkansas. And we, we went to eat, you
• 17:53
  know, several times while we were that weekend.
• 17:56
  And every time, of course, he's a very recognizable person.
• 17:59
  He's he's much taller than I thought he was.
• 18:02
  So he really stands out. But he he handled it so great.
• 18:06
  Like people would tell him to tell you what he's eating.
• 18:08
  He goes, Hey, guys, this all I ask, like, can I finish my meal?
• 18:12
  And when I get done with my meal, I'll stay as long as you
• 18:14
  guys want me to. And we did.
• 18:16
  Everywhere we went, there was a line waiting, but everybody was
• 18:20
  respectful. Like nobody was pushed here or,
• 18:22
  you know, went too far. But he and I, everybody I've
• 18:26
  talked to since then, I'm like, hey, that's that's the guy that
• 18:29
  they need to model themselves after when it comes to dealing
• 18:32
  with the public. Yeah.
• 18:33
  You know, he he knows where he's bread buttered.
• 18:36
  Yeah. He did a great job.
• 18:37
  He's a great guy. I enjoyed that hang.
• 18:40
  I know that's the way Dan Marley was.
• 18:43
  I ran sound for a band called the Diesel Dogs in Arizona, and
• 18:46
  they had a gig at his restaurant in downtown Phoenix.
• 18:50
  And he was a superstar at the time.
• 18:52
  Right. This is in the height of the
• 18:53
  Sun's Run. Yeah.
• 18:55
  So him and Joe Klein are sitting at the bar and they're.
• 18:57
  It's kind of an indoor, outdoor thing where they can watch the
• 19:01
  game and enjoy the band at the same time.
• 19:04
  And all of a sudden I see him and Joe Klein get up and shake
• 19:06
  hands and hug each other. And Dan came out to me because I
• 19:10
  was running sound. And he said, I'm so embarrassed
• 19:13
  I have to leave. I got to go catch a plane.
• 19:15
  I just got a phone call and I was like, Dan Marley, why are
• 19:19
  you talking to me, right? He said, I love music, man.
• 19:23
  And I was looking forward to seeing this band and they're
• 19:25
  everything that I thought they were.
• 19:26
  And they sound great for the rest of the night.
• 19:29
  Whatever you guys want is on me. Apologize to them on my behalf.
• 19:34
  I'm like. OK, that's really cool.
• 19:36
  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Nobody's going to be mad at you,
• 19:38
  but OK, No, no. Yeah.
• 19:40
  That's awesome, man. Those guys.
• 19:42
  Are those those guys that that recognize?
• 19:48
  Why? They're who they are.
• 19:49
  Their success and the and the reason that they haven't like, I
• 19:52
  mean, those guys are they're the real ones and they're and
• 19:54
  they're also. And to show you that you're, to
• 19:57
  show you that they're a human being, right?
• 19:59
  Yeah, yeah. Yeah, we all.
• 20:02
  It's crazy. I hope, I hope that that's a
• 20:04
  problem. I have to deal with something.
• 20:06
  We do too. That's why you're here.
• 20:09
  Oh yeah. You should have that every.
• 20:10
  Once in a while, I go to, I'll go to Walmart and people will
• 20:14
  recognize me like, you know, yeah, like, hey, aren't you,
• 20:17
  aren't you that comedian? I'm like, yeah.
• 20:18
  And they're like, oh man, we saw your show.
• 20:20
  It was great. I so that's it.
• 20:22
  I'm, I'm in the, I'm at the point right now where that's
• 20:25
  that means the world to me. I'm so excited when people
• 20:28
  recognize me and, you know, stuff like that.
• 20:31
  So and you know, when it, when it happens, of course I'm over
• 20:35
  the top gracious and grateful and want to stop and visit with
• 20:38
  them. And yeah, you know, because I
• 20:40
  want them to have enjoyed the show, but but then also
• 20:43
  remember, Oh yeah. And I saw him someplace else and
• 20:45
  he was just a cool dude. Right, and then they're going to
• 20:47
  tell that story is the more and more popular you get when you
• 20:49
  hit reach that level of fame you want to attain, then they'd be
• 20:52
  like, oh, I met him that one time at the Walmart or whatever,
• 20:55
  you know? And so then their friends are
• 20:58
  going to watch your stuff because they think, OK, I know
• 21:01
  somebody that knows him. And then that's something that
• 21:03
  it's kind of like how Metallica became Metallica.
• 21:05
  People would record their concerts, make a sense, give it
• 21:07
  to their friends, sell them for 5 bucks.
• 21:09
  All of a sudden you have this word of mouth going on because
• 21:11
  nobody would play their material and then boom, they explode.
• 21:15
  So that's what you need, Matt. Take a sets of your show when
• 21:17
  you go to Walmart and hand them out to random people.
• 21:19
  I'm Matt Farrell, I'm a funny guy.
• 21:21
  Just check this out. And then and if you bring the
• 21:24
  cassette, bring the cassette to my show and I'll let you in for
• 21:27
  free. And that way you know, they're,
• 21:29
  they're either, you know, fans or they're, you're diligent
• 21:32
  wanting to see your show for a cassette tape.
• 21:34
  He's going to have to explain. For 5 minutes to every.
• 21:37
  Person they hands it to what? A cassette.
• 21:39
  I didn't think about that. I just.
• 21:43
  Did. Give away tape players also
• 21:46
  because nobody's got anything to play it.
• 21:47
  On Wow did I just take my phone? Yeah, yeah.
• 21:52
  Now you just got to, you just got to give them the let them
• 21:54
  scan something on your phone and go here, go listen to me for
• 21:57
  free. Cassette tape.
• 21:58
  He's doing his own comedy, ladies and gentlemen.
• 22:04
  That's amazing. Of course I don't I Andy.
• 22:06
  Has something to plan. On I do I do have something to
• 22:09
  plan on too. It's right behind him.
• 22:14
  Here's a here's I dated myself, but the other direction, just
• 22:17
  the other day I went to I got, I got AI got a message, an e-mail
• 22:21
  wanting to know if I would come do a show at a assisted living
• 22:25
  place. And.
• 22:26
  I was like, well, demographic, definitely not my demographic,
• 22:31
  but it's guaranteed paycheck and you know, and I said I take off
• 22:35
  during the winter time, so I'll do a whole lot.
• 22:37
  So I was like, hell yeah, I'll come do it.
• 22:39
  And there's only like an hour and a half from my house.
• 22:41
  So I, I get to sleep in my own bed.
• 22:42
  That's always great. So I go up there and I do it.
• 22:44
  Here's the problem. A lot of my material is talk.
• 22:47
  Like when I go and do something, a lot of times I'm the old guy
• 22:50
  in the room, right? You know, I'm in the mid 40s, a
• 22:53
  lot of people at the club or 30s and, you know, between 18 and in
• 22:57
  their 30s. So I'm talking about, hey, you
• 22:59
  know, now that I'm older, like I, I pay attention to where all
• 23:02
  the bathroom exits are. I, you know, I had to slow down
• 23:05
  with this because now, like I don't, I don't push on farts, I
• 23:09
  ease them out because you never fucking know nowadays, you know
• 23:11
  what I mean? So I'm telling all these jokes
• 23:13
  about how what it's like getting older, but I'm doing my same
• 23:16
  material at a old folks home and they're all looking at me like,
• 23:19
  hey buddy, why don't you go fuck yourself?
• 23:20
  I'm wearing a diaper right now, you know what I mean?
• 23:23
  So that was a little awkward, but hey, I need you guys use
• 23:28
  your imagination and take yourself back to when you were
• 23:31
  younger than me. Otherwise it's just not going to
• 23:33
  work. No.
• 23:34
  Otherwise. It's just not going to do stuff
• 23:37
  like that. Or you just like in in like a
• 23:38
  like like a, a, a standard like a like a great room where they
• 23:42
  have their activities and stuff. Are you doing it?
• 23:44
  Yeah, just like. OK.
• 23:45
  Yeah, OK. Yeah, no, in their, in their, in
• 23:49
  their craft, you know, arts and crafts hall.
• 23:51
  OK. There, there was a cool place
• 23:53
  like they said, tried to make it like a state they had.
• 23:57
  They had red velvet ropes down the side to kind of mark off
• 23:59
  where the stage should be. Like they really, they really
• 24:02
  did it up. They had a good sound system.
• 24:04
  I didn't even have to say my own sound like so it's cool and some
• 24:07
  of the people really enjoyed it. Of course, there's a lot of guys
• 24:10
  there that were old vets. So when I get to some of the
• 24:13
  material where I I talk about my dad and growing up with a
• 24:16
  Vietnam vet and kind of making fun of that.
• 24:18
  And then afterwards those guys, they came to them and they're
• 24:21
  like, I know exactly what you mean.
• 24:24
  So you know, I still had fun, but I also.
• 24:28
  Let me ask you this man I. Have fun in public bathrooms.
• 24:30
  I don't eat shit right. Right.
• 24:32
  Yeah, yeah, You know, look. Let me ask you this real quick
• 24:35
  SO. OK.
• 24:37
  Chris just heard me practicing a couple different songs.
• 24:40
  You know, I'll spend the first hour before this podcast jam
• 24:43
  and, you know, keeping my skills up or whatever.
• 24:46
  I hear other comedians talk like famous comedians about how they
• 24:50
  go workshop their new material all the time, right?
• 24:53
  So they have the luxury of going to, let's say, the Laugh Factory
• 24:57
  or the Comedy Store and trying out their stuff before they do a
• 25:00
  big special. I would consider you to be like,
• 25:04
  you're not a beginner, but you're not Dave Chappelle,
• 25:07
  right? So at your level, how do you
• 25:10
  work out your new material? Do you still just do it at the
• 25:14
  club and do it for free or a lesser pay or how do you work it
• 25:20
  out? Well, like a lot of times we go
• 25:22
  to open mics, which open mics are kind of the the gym for a
• 25:26
  comedian, you know, So it's a, they're always free.
• 25:30
  The crowd sometimes is not worth a shit.
• 25:32
  So a lot of times the the crowd is mostly other comics waiting
• 25:36
  to go up and do their stuff. So so fella open laugh at your
• 25:41
  stuff. I don't Oh my God, it's no dude.
• 25:45
  Comedians are so they're such fucking tit bags.
• 25:49
  They don't want to laugh at your shit because then a laugh in the
• 25:51
  room is bigger than when they went up and then so they don't
• 25:55
  want people thinking that your jokes are funnier than that.
• 25:57
  It's Oh my God, it sucks so bad. I got open mics are a great
• 26:02
  thing. I just don't enjoy them very
• 26:05
  much. But I have the luxury of I've
• 26:09
  heard I book and produce most of my own shows.
• 26:12
  So I can and I do, I do at least an hour at a time.
• 26:17
  So sometimes I do an hour, sometimes I do an hour and 15 to
• 26:20
  an hour and 20. And so when I've got a new joke
• 26:23
  that I'm going to work out, I'll find a spot in my existing set
• 26:27
  that's already good. Yeah, I'll find a spot that I
• 26:29
  can plug it in there and I can run it.
• 26:31
  And if it doesn't work, it's OK because the next joke is one of
• 26:34
  my tried and true jokes. Yeah, right.
• 26:37
  OK. I just, I workshop.
• 26:38
  I workshop jokes at actual shows, which a lot of comics are
• 26:43
  doing that, like bigger name comics, you know, because all
• 26:46
  you ever get to see is when their special comes out on TV,
• 26:50
  right In touring with the exact same material for two years or
• 26:55
  three years or five years, and they've been honing it the whole
• 26:59
  time. So when they're doing their
• 27:01
  shows, they're still working on the material.
• 27:04
  OK. Sure.
• 27:05
  It's just, you know, you're practice.
• 27:07
  You're practicing on the go. I would.
• 27:10
  Difference. Between comics and between
• 27:12
  difference I would say between comics and musicians is you guys
• 27:16
  can get together and and go to a studio or somebody's garage or
• 27:20
  whatever and jam it out until you've got it perfect before you
• 27:23
  present it to the audience. Whereas a comic, we don't know
• 27:27
  if it's perfect until we presented it to the audience.
• 27:30
  So we have to that's. The point I wanted you to with.
• 27:32
  The audience and then figure it out from there.
• 27:35
  Yeah. You can only stand in front of
• 27:38
  the mirror for so long before you have to put it in front of
• 27:41
  people because you require the interaction.
• 27:44
  That's that's part of the gig. You know you need the laugh,
• 27:47
  otherwise you don't know if it was.
• 27:48
  So here's a question. So you're right, you're right
• 27:50
  material up right, you're right. And you got your 30 minute set.
• 27:53
  You write up right. Do you like Mike just asked how
• 27:58
  like, how do you memorize that? How do you do you would you like
• 28:00
  like there's that scene that you know, that movie once a time,
• 28:02
  Once Upon a time in Hollywood with Leonardo DiCaprio and
• 28:05
  whatnot. And he's in the pool in his
• 28:07
  backyard. His, his character just got the
• 28:09
  headphones on and he's learning his lines while he's floating in
• 28:13
  the pool drinking whiskey sour, whatever.
• 28:16
  So like the, the, the small time I spent acting, it was all kind
• 28:21
  of kind of that where I would just read it and read it that
• 28:23
  read everybody's role, you know, in the, in the script that I
• 28:26
  would had and I would learn it that way.
• 28:27
  Then dry rehearsals and crack. You know, you do all that, but
• 28:30
  with a comedian, because with the band is I learned the lyrics
• 28:33
  as, as we were working on the song rehearsals and stuff,
• 28:36
  right. But as a comedian, you write
• 28:39
  your 30 minutes of material and then, like Mike said, are you
• 28:41
  standing in front of the mirror? Are you, are you Outback like I
• 28:44
  like, as funny as it sounds, I would take our songs, put them
• 28:48
  on a cassette tape, dating, and whatever I was doing, I would
• 28:52
  listen to our songs over and over and over again.
• 28:54
  And I would, until I could start singing to myself.
• 28:56
  Yeah, he drove me nuts with our shit.
• 28:58
  He's like, just put it on a tape so I could.
• 29:00
  No, it was in the best. Way possible.
• 29:02
  So if I'm doing yard work, I'm listening to, I'm listening to
• 29:04
  all this our set list and I keep, I keep singing along to
• 29:08
  the setlist because then that just makes it, you know, it's
• 29:10
  just commonplace. So how do you do it as a?
• 29:12
  So before you answer that, Matt, my question in the middle of
• 29:16
  that is the thing that I would consider the same.
• 29:19
  I like that question so much because music and comedy is all
• 29:22
  about timing. So I think the most important
• 29:26
  part of his question is how do you work out the timing part of
• 29:29
  it to know where to let people laugh and end and yeah.
• 29:36
  Well, so it's a trial and error when it comes to the timing part
• 29:41
  of it. You just do it and either move
• 29:43
  real quick on to the next joke or you learn that, hey, that
• 29:46
  joke hits really hard, so I need to give it time to breathe.
• 29:49
  Sometimes silence is part of the joke.
• 29:52
  So I'll tell a joke and then I'll just be quiet and just kind
• 29:55
  of look at them and they understand that that's part of
• 29:58
  the joke. So it's that's.
• 30:01
  Give give. Give give.
• 30:04
  Give us an example of silence because in music silence is is
• 30:06
  purposeful too. We have a stop and a song and
• 30:09
  the entire crowd just kind of stopped and all of a sudden 4
• 30:12
  beats later we're just we're off to the races again.
• 30:14
  And that get that leads to the fans and the and the people in
• 30:18
  the crowd to understand this is a tight band.
• 30:20
  Like they are on point, which is, which is an automatic
• 30:23
  respect level when you do that. So can you give us, I mean,
• 30:26
  let's put you on the spot. Can you give us an example of a
• 30:28
  joke like that where there's a pause on purpose?
• 30:31
  Yeah, yeah. So I've got, I've got this joke
• 30:34
  that and the in this particular joke, the pause is not, it's not
• 30:39
  part of the funny part, but it's part of the build of
• 30:42
  anticipation. OK, so I do a joke where I talk
• 30:44
  about there's two different types of men in the world.
• 30:47
  There's men that are protectors and men that are not protectors.
• 30:51
  And I just stop now. They're already drawing their
• 30:54
  own conclusion in their mind as to what I'm talking about.
• 30:57
  They automatically think that I'm talking about a tough guy
• 31:00
  and a bitch. I could see that.
• 31:02
  But then, so after I was, I let that sink in.
• 31:05
  Yeah, I let that sink in. And then I followed up with, I'm
• 31:08
  not saying that one man's better than the other.
• 31:11
  They're just two different types as men.
• 31:13
  And now they've got a real back in and go wait a minute.
• 31:17
  A little bitch is definitely not as good of a person as the tough
• 31:21
  guy, you know? And then the story goes on,
• 31:24
  like, here's a real good example of how you can figure out what
• 31:27
  kind of man you've got. You just send him to take the
• 31:28
  trash out after dark and you just watch him out the window.
• 31:33
  Now I'm letting them draw their own picture and they're like,
• 31:36
  immediately dudes. Dudes in the audience
• 31:40
  immediately know what I'm talking about, but women don't
• 31:43
  take the trash out after dark as often as men.
• 31:46
  Not saying that women don't, but they don't as often.
• 31:49
  So men automatically know what I'm talking about when you take
• 31:52
  the trash out at dark, when you're walking out there, the
• 31:55
  bags rattling, it's it covers up all the silence.
• 31:58
  Then you throw it in the duster. When you're walking back, it's
• 32:00
  silent except for that twig that you heard snap in the distance.
• 32:04
  Now it turns into a little bit more brisk of a walk.
• 32:07
  Right. So the whole the whole joke is
• 32:11
  if he if he takes the trash out to the dumpster, throws in a
• 32:14
  dumpster and walks back to the house, this guys not scared of
• 32:17
  nothing and he's got you. But if he throws that trash in a
• 32:19
  dumpster and it runs his ass back to the house, that fools
• 32:22
  scared of the dark and he ain't going to save you from shit.
• 32:25
  Ladies. So, but that's and I mean, and
• 32:29
  that that joke is probably because, because then I go on to
• 32:34
  explain that, hey, I'm I'm part of group number 2 and I don't
• 32:37
  give a shit. Who knows?
• 32:38
  My wife has known this about me from the beginning.
• 32:41
  I told her I told her in the beginning, baby, the six foot 8,
• 32:43
  somebody comes in that door and starts shit with you.
• 32:45
  I'll fight him to the death. But if something goes bump in
• 32:48
  the night, it's you're on your own.
• 32:49
  I can't say boogie man. I won't even try.
• 32:52
  I'm scared of the dark something.
• 32:56
  Then that joke, that joke builds and it goes it it leads into two
• 33:00
  other jokes after that. So but that that pause of you're
• 33:04
  just giving them time to draw their own conclusion.
• 33:07
  And then you immediately, you immediately break the idea that
• 33:11
  they had come up with on their own.
• 33:12
  OK, so that, but yeah, I mean the pause.
• 33:15
  And the silence, sometimes. Is just as important as the
• 33:18
  word, right? Which is crazy, because new
• 33:22
  comics are terrified of silence as soon as they tell a joke.
• 33:25
  If it's not, if they don't get an immediate reaction, it Spooks
• 33:29
  them. So they hurry up and they tell
• 33:30
  the next joke. So they'll write 30 minutes
• 33:32
  worth of material and do that shit in 4 1/2 minutes because
• 33:36
  they just. I just run through it because
• 33:38
  they're scared. So here's no problem.
• 33:41
  I'll sit in silence all day. Yeah.
• 33:43
  Here's a common parallel, Matt. It's the same thing and I was
• 33:46
  guilty of it. And every guitar player in the
• 33:48
  world is guilty of it. With new league guitar players,
• 33:51
  they think they have to fill every space and use every note
• 33:55
  on the neck. Right when Chris logged on, I
• 33:58
  was jamming to a Southern rock background tune.
• 34:01
  I was only playing like 3 notes. It sounded like I was playing a
• 34:05
  million to a person that doesn't know what's going on.
• 34:07
  But really I was playing three notes over and over and over
• 34:10
  again, just in different rhythms, right?
• 34:12
  It's the same concept. You have to stop every now and
• 34:15
  then and let the listener hear what's going on in the
• 34:18
  background. And sometimes that background is
• 34:21
  silent so everybody can be engaged at the same time.
• 34:24
  I look at stand up comedy almost as like a hypnotic, you know,
• 34:28
  I'm sucked into your universe for an hour and 10 minutes, hour
• 34:32
  and a half, however long you're up there.
• 34:34
  I'm in the Matt Farrell world. And if long as you don't let me
• 34:37
  down, I'm going to stay there for the whole time.
• 34:41
  And what you just described to me is, like Chris said, when we
• 34:45
  would stop in Freeman, you could just see everybody's face, go
• 34:48
  what's going to happen next. And then when we all started
• 34:51
  again, there was that look of amazement.
• 34:53
  You know, we're just as amazed just like you are.
• 34:56
  You know when you hear those laughs, that's just as
• 34:59
  fulfilling for you as it is for the person who got to laugh at
• 35:03
  your joke. For sure, yeah.
• 35:06
  It's, it's instant gratification.
• 35:07
  It's the it's performing in front of a live audience,
• 35:10
  whether it's a band or or comedy, when you can immediately
• 35:15
  see their appreciation of what you put time and effort into.
• 35:18
  Yeah, it's, it's the greatest. Yeah.
• 35:20
  I I couldn't imagine being an actor and creating a movie and
• 35:25
  it's all done now we just have to wait and see if they like it
• 35:28
  or not. That would destroy me.
• 35:30
  I would. I would go absolutely nuts
• 35:32
  waiting on a response. See, I would go if I was, if I
• 35:35
  was an actor on that level, I would, yeah, I would actually go
• 35:38
  to the movie and I would hide in the back and watch it and not
• 35:41
  let anybody know I was there. Put a hoodie on.
• 35:43
  You know. And I just some of those guys
• 35:45
  sit there in. Silence and eat my popcorn and
• 35:48
  just kind of like OK and it's and that's that would be a
• 35:51
  telltale sign like holy shit I'm really really bad I need to go
• 35:53
  work at at QT management now or like wow they love me I'm going
• 35:57
  to go get more movies done because.
• 35:59
  And this would be epic if Chris Dunham would get up at the end
• 36:03
  of the movie and say, are you not entertained?
• 36:07
  Should I not entertain you, Crow?
• 36:11
  So here's what I'm telling you. I was going to give you an
• 36:15
  example of probably the best living in the silence I've I've
• 36:18
  ever heard of. And it was Ellen, Ellen
• 36:20
  DeGeneres, which like her lover hater, doesn't we?
• 36:25
  Yeah, apparently she was a mean boss.
• 36:27
  But you know, we still listen to Elvis Presley and Michael
• 36:29
  Jackson's. She was a great stand up bad
• 36:32
  shit too. So yeah, so.
• 36:33
  But one of her first times, one of her first paid gigs she ever
• 36:37
  did, she didn't have any material.
• 36:39
  She didn't know what she was going to do, but she didn't want
• 36:41
  to pass up the opportunity. So on her way to the gig, she
• 36:44
  stopped at Burger King and bought a Whopper meal.
• 36:48
  And as soon as they called her on the stage, she walked.
• 36:51
  She walked on the stage with the bag, set it on the stool and was
• 36:55
  like, hey, sorry guys, I didn't have enough time to eat before
• 36:58
  the show today. So if you guys don't mind, I'm
• 37:00
  going to I'm going to eat two birds with one stone situation.
• 37:03
  And the audience is kind of like, what the fuck?
• 37:05
  Then she pulls out the burger takes, she goes, so here's the
• 37:08
  first joke I was going to tell you guys.
• 37:10
  And she takes a bite and holds her finger up while she chews.
• 37:15
  And as soon as she swallows that she goes, So what I was saying?
• 37:18
  And then she takes another bite, holds her finger up while she
• 37:21
  chews. She ate that entire meal, never
• 37:25
  told the joke at a standing ovation walking off the stage,
• 37:29
  and she just lived in the silence.
• 37:31
  It was the silence was the joke. And it's cool.
• 37:34
  I mean, and for I would love to try to do something like that
• 37:38
  now, but the idea of that being a brand new comic and they had
• 37:42
  the balls to do that, that's fucking impressive.
• 37:44
  Well, and I think, I think with women, especially back then when
• 37:49
  she started, not only when she was a woman, but she was a
• 37:51
  lesbian. So those are two strikes against
• 37:53
  her when it comes to any type of entertainment field.
• 37:56
  Because all of a sudden you're automatically not as good as.
• 38:00
  So that shows the true ability of somebody who didn't give a
• 38:03
  fuck. And and just like you said, she
• 38:05
  wanted to, to keep the spot because it was offered to her.
• 38:08
  Andy Kaufman did something similar.
• 38:10
  If you don't, if you don't remember this dating myself on
• 38:12
  Saturday Night Live, his audition tape was the, the, the,
• 38:16
  the theme song for Mighty Mouse. Remember that?
• 38:19
  And he was standing there the whole time as the song would
• 38:21
  play. Yeah.
• 38:21
  And then and then one bit of the song he like here, William, just
• 38:24
  save the day. And that's it.
• 38:26
  Yeah. That was it.
• 38:27
  The entire theme song played. And he just.
• 38:29
  Yeah, mimicked that and just sat there.
• 38:32
  So again, enjoying the silence. That's brilliant.
• 38:36
  Yeah, so the guy that goes on America's Got Talent and and
• 38:41
  chooses to do the song Tequila karaoke version, right is was
• 38:46
  fucking brilliant. He goes out there, he just
• 38:47
  stands on stage while Tequila's playing and it's got the
• 38:50
  bouncing ball on the screen that's going across.
• 38:53
  And then it got to that part and he goes tequila.
• 38:55
  And then the song kept going. So it's like the worst karaoke
• 38:59
  song ever. But that's what he did.
• 39:01
  And the audience erupted. It was hilarious that somebody,
• 39:05
  and I don't know if it's that the that idea is that funny or
• 39:10
  the idea of doing it on that size of a stage is amazing.
• 39:16
  You know. You, when you go, when you get,
• 39:18
  you get an opportunity to go play in front of somebody.
• 39:22
  You get an opportunity to go play in front of somebody.
• 39:23
  Y'all, y'all, your band, you've got, you've been putting out
• 39:27
  music for a long time. You're working on all this
• 39:28
  stuff, you've been crushing it. And then a record company comes
• 39:32
  to go. Hey, we want, we want you guys
• 39:34
  we're going to come to, we're going to meet y'all at the
• 39:35
  studio. We want y'all to play some music
• 39:37
  for us. We're making a decision today as
• 39:39
  to whether or not we're going to pick y'all up.
• 39:40
  Yeah, you don't go in and work on the song that you just.
• 39:43
  Started right? No.
• 39:44
  No. No, you go in and you do, you do
• 39:47
  the top notch driving through the shit that blows the roof off
• 39:49
  the place. Yeah.
• 39:51
  So the idea of a guy going onto a stage like that and going fuck
• 39:54
  it, let's see if this works. Yeah, that's, yeah.
• 39:58
  God, how? Far.
• 39:59
  How far? How?
• 39:59
  How far did they get in America's Got Talent after that
• 40:02
  though? Because again, it's a bit.
• 40:04
  He made it past the first round. I don't.
• 40:06
  I don't, Yeah. I don't remember if he, I don't
• 40:08
  remember if he made it any because I don't even remember
• 40:10
  what he did in the second round. There you go.
• 40:12
  So the second, the second act must not have been that damn
• 40:15
  good. Like what other songs are there
• 40:17
  that's only got one word? Right.
• 40:19
  But he's still, you know, he's still, you know, got his moment,
• 40:21
  the spotlight, which is pretty cool.
• 40:24
  That's a big stage. Yeah, that's a big stage.
• 40:27
  So back, so back to what? I was what I because we went
• 40:29
  squirrel moments. So you write material, you got
• 40:31
  it down. How are you rehearsing it?
• 40:33
  Are you doing it like you doing it you you bring it to your
• 40:36
  wife? Your kids.
• 40:37
  You're talking about just like memorizing it.
• 40:40
  Yeah, like you write. You write something like when
• 40:41
  you feel like. Yeah, 'cause you said you.
• 40:43
  Do an You said you do an hour, man, that's a long.
• 40:46
  People don't realize how long an hour of comedy is.
• 40:49
  An hour of music is a long time. An hour of comedy is an
• 40:51
  eternity. So I, I have, I, I mean, when
• 40:58
  I'm working on building the joke a lot of time, or if I come up
• 41:01
  with a premise or I remember a story that happened and I want
• 41:05
  to figure out how to turn this story into something that stays
• 41:09
  worthy because it's you, the three of us just hanging out.
• 41:11
  And I tell you a story about something that happened last
• 41:13
  night might be funny. Now I have to be able to make
• 41:16
  that story to where it's funny to a crowd of people.
• 41:19
  So it's, it's a different way of telling a story.
• 41:21
  But a lot of times what I'll do is I'll, every time I run into
• 41:24
  somebody at the store, I'll go, hey, let's tell you what
• 41:27
  happened the other day and I'll tell them the story.
• 41:30
  And I it's just. Just a random stranger.
• 41:34
  No, Well, no, I usually I don't just walk up to strangers and go
• 41:36
  hey. Oh, OK.
• 41:38
  John, I see your name. I see your name tag on your
• 41:41
  shirt right there. I just want to tell you a story
• 41:42
  real quick. That's fucking psychotic, Mike.
• 41:45
  I would never do that. I mean, but.
• 41:47
  Why? Why is that psychotic?
• 41:48
  I've, I've had random conversations with people at the
• 41:51
  store. My wife looks at me like, what
• 41:52
  the fuck are you doing? But you know, it's an old guy.
• 41:54
  He's got a veteran's hat on. So I don't have a conversation.
• 41:57
  But I don't think that'd be psycho.
• 41:58
  I think that would be pretty cool because then you could do
• 42:00
  that in your bit. So I was at the grocery store
• 42:02
  and saw this guy named John, name tag with John.
• 42:04
  I was like, Hey, John, let me tell you the story.
• 42:06
  That's a bit in itself, right? OK, but but you have to
• 42:11
  understand the type of I've definitely walked up and sparked
• 42:14
  conversation with strangers because I think that that's
• 42:17
  funny. I also call people by name.
• 42:20
  Every time I see somebody wearing a name tag, I call them
• 42:22
  by name just as I go by because it's hilarious to me that some
• 42:25
  of them go have that guy know my name.
• 42:27
  You're wearing a name tag. But the idea of walking up to
• 42:31
  somebody and going, you know, if I, if I don't know you, I just
• 42:35
  just saw you in the store. I can excuse me, Sir.
• 42:37
  I want to tell you about this thing real quick.
• 42:40
  So the other day I had this thought while I was having sex
• 42:43
  with my wife from behind. I noticed that she had a, you
• 42:46
  know, she had her hair up in a bun, but had an ink pen holding
• 42:50
  it in place. And I thought how how thoughtful
• 42:52
  of her because she knows that when I think of something funny,
• 42:55
  I've got to write it down immediately.
• 42:57
  And I thought that she put it there so that if I thought of
• 42:59
  something funny while fucking her from behind, I could just
• 43:01
  pull the pen out and write a note on her ass.
• 43:04
  That would be really weird to just walk up and tell to a guy.
• 43:07
  Grocery store. I was going to have a whole
• 43:09
  other level of respect for you, man.
• 43:12
  Now, if if you were, if you were, if you were shopping at an
• 43:14
  adult store, that would totally play out nicely.
• 43:18
  Like when you're shopping for the.
• 43:19
  You want to hear something? Yeah, I do bring it on.
• 43:23
  Here's something crazy. I cannot go in those stores.
• 43:27
  But you'll buy as much as. I do as I Yeah, I don't have to.
• 43:32
  I don't have to look that cashier in the eye.
• 43:35
  Let me tell you. I'll tell you.
• 43:36
  This is the story. So have you have y'all driven
• 43:39
  through Missouri? Very much.
• 43:41
  It's not as bad now as it used to be.
• 43:43
  Oh yeah. Used to when you would go on
• 43:45
  I-44 through Missouri, every exit there was 2 billboards, one
• 43:50
  over top of the other. One of them said JD's porn, porn
• 43:55
  in you know, emporium or whatever.
• 43:57
  And the one underneath it was the one that said Jesus hates
• 44:00
  porn and every but there was a porn shop at every exit.
• 44:04
  It was ridiculous. And I've never liked sporting
• 44:07
  those places. They make me unstoppable.
• 44:09
  And I think it came from there's a porn store in the there's a
• 44:12
  couple of them now in the in the town where I'm from.
• 44:14
  And I always thought, man, if I was to pull in there, what if my
• 44:17
  grandparents drive by and see my truck parked out front?
• 44:19
  I don't want to have to have that conversation at fucking
• 44:21
  Thanksgiving. I think that's where the
• 44:23
  original fear came from. But so where I got a buddy of
• 44:26
  mine, we're driving to Saint Louis to pick up a truck and
• 44:28
  we're coming back and he's a pervert.
• 44:30
  He wants to stop at every fucking one of them.
• 44:32
  And I'm like, I'm not stopping, I'm not stopping.
• 44:34
  I'm not going to do it. We're on the way back.
• 44:36
  He's finally wore me down and I was like fine, we'll stop at
• 44:38
  this one. Surely my grandparents won't see
• 44:40
  my truck in the parking lot here.
• 44:42
  We're in a different state. We go in he there's a life sized
• 44:46
  foam sex doll inside of a plastic case, but it's got a
• 44:50
  hole in it so that you can reach in and and see how real it
• 44:54
  feels. He beats me in the door when I
• 44:56
  come around the corner. He's got his he's got his arm in
• 44:59
  this thing and he's like you should see how real this feels.
• 45:01
  And I'm like what the fuck is wrong with you dude?
• 45:04
  So I just walk away from him and act like I don't know him.
• 45:06
  Now I'm in this door. I'm like, all right, I guess.
• 45:08
  I guess I'll buy a movie or something because I feel like
• 45:11
  it's even weirder if you just go in and walk around and leave
• 45:14
  that. That seems weirder to me for
• 45:15
  some reason. So I buy a movie that I'll never
• 45:19
  forget. This was, this was probably 20
• 45:22
  years ago. The movie I bought was called
• 45:24
  Let's Make a Squeal. And if there were no pigs
• 45:28
  involved in the movie, I promise.
• 45:30
  But here's what made it even worse.
• 45:33
  As I'm walking to the counter to pay for this movie, I realized
• 45:37
  that it is one of the hottest chicks I've ever seen in my life
• 45:41
  sitting behind the counter. And I'm like, well, this is
• 45:43
  fixing to be fucking embarrassing and I don't know
• 45:47
  why, but what made it even worse is when I got up there and I put
• 45:50
  some movie down, she said, is that going to be all for you?
• 45:52
  And I said, yes, ma'am. And she started rolling her
• 45:55
  wheelchair towards the counter. So there's this smoking hot
• 45:58
  chick who's in a wheelchair and and she's watching some pervert
• 46:03
  come in and buy a movie called Let's Make a Squeal.
• 46:05
  It it. I've never been more embarrassed
• 46:08
  in all my life. I've never seen that woman
• 46:09
  again. I'll never see her again, but it
• 46:12
  embarrassed the shit. I mean I don't know why her
• 46:14
  being in a wheelchair made it worse, but it fucking did.
• 46:17
  I'm not going to lie to you, Matt.
• 46:19
  I thought you were going to say your grandpa was at the counter
• 46:21
  buying a movie. You were right behind him.
• 46:26
  I was going to tell you that. My story.
• 46:28
  Is familiar. I was going to tell you my story
• 46:31
  is marginally worse until you said she was in a wheelchair.
• 46:34
  I went in the one that was at I-17 in the freeway.
• 46:38
  Crystal, know what I'm talking about.
• 46:39
  I can't even remember the name of the place, but I go in there.
• 46:43
  I'm probably 2021. And the fucking dude behind the
• 46:47
  counter kept talking to me. You know, I'm like, I'm in there
• 46:50
  trying to keep my head down and I'm like, I'm just going to buy
• 46:53
  a movie and go home because I just moved here and I don't know
• 46:55
  anyone, right? And the dude like, hey, what's
• 46:58
  going on? Like, what do you, what do you
• 47:01
  mean, what's going on? Everybody's here for the same
• 47:03
  reason. Why would you even ask No one
• 47:05
  that question, you know? But it was that kind of deal
• 47:09
  where he just kept talking to me and I'm like, shut the fuck up,
• 47:12
  man. I just want to buy a movie.
• 47:13
  Get out of here. Dude I feel like.
• 47:16
  When you're in there, you're the most normal.
• 47:18
  Person, this is not a good place for conversation.
• 47:20
  You know what I mean? I don't, I don't want to.
• 47:22
  I don't want to stand in a urinal and a guy walk up next to
• 47:24
  me and go, hey man, how you doing bro?
• 47:26
  Just shut the fuck up you got. We both get our Dicks in our
• 47:28
  hand. Now's not a good time to talk,
• 47:30
  you know what I mean? It's just weird.
• 47:33
  Wait till we get outside. Yeah, I don't even know what
• 47:37
  sparked the conversation of going to a porn store now.
• 47:40
  And Yep. Well, I've had my adventures
• 47:44
  too, so. Yeah.
• 47:48
  Our drummer took me to one that actually had the girls behind
• 47:52
  the glass where you went to the backroom.
• 47:53
  You know, the extra room that's even more perverted than the
• 47:56
  actual porn store itself. Yeah, we went to one of those
• 47:59
  places to talk about a sad group of individuals.
• 48:04
  The the carpet sticky and it smells like semen everywhere you
• 48:07
  go. There's just there's a smell to
• 48:09
  that. Oh my God dude, you can't even
• 48:12
  imagine. Is that way?
• 48:14
  Is that is that way they recommend men drink pineapple
• 48:17
  juice? Yeah, yeah.
• 48:21
  Just like, what the hell are you talking about?
• 48:23
  You drink too much pineapple juices.
• 48:26
  You drink too much pineapple juice.
• 48:27
  Sits your pee hole on fire. That's really clear.
• 48:32
  Oh, yeah. You've never drank too much.
• 48:35
  You drink anything, anything that's got too much, you know,
• 48:38
  super acidity like that. Yeah, you drink a lot.
• 48:41
  Of you'll never know. Burning when you pee.
• 48:43
  Oh. Chris will never know because he
• 48:45
  drinks about 7 gallons of water a day.
• 48:47
  I'm. I'm a water baby.
• 48:48
  If I went to the only time I didn't drink a ton of water, We
• 48:51
  went to New York a few years ago and we realized at the end of
• 48:54
  the day, holy shit, we didn't we didn't drink water.
• 48:56
  Like I'll drink hold on easily four or five of these a day at
• 49:02
  least. I mean, if not more.
• 49:05
  And then when I'm working out, I'll drink before and after,
• 49:07
  after I work out protein shake with then I'm drinking the water
• 49:11
  down Gatorade, water down Gatorade.
• 49:14
  So I'm all, I don't drink soda. I don't drink, you know, I do
• 49:16
  drink grape juice, watermelon juice and orange juice every
• 49:19
  day. But other than that, it's, it's
• 49:21
  just water. And, you know, don't drink any
• 49:24
  booze. I'll be 21 years sober in
• 49:25
  February. So don't drink milk.
• 49:28
  Well, congratulations. Thank you.
• 49:30
  Thank you. So yeah, you know.
• 49:32
  Yeah, but. Yeah, I didn't know that about
• 49:34
  pineapple juice. I mean, I knew that about
• 49:35
  pineapple juice, but I didn't know that was, yeah, excess of
• 49:38
  pineapple juice. Interesting.
• 49:42
  Yeah. I think the the, the, the
• 49:44
  original thing was I, I didn't work out any material while I
• 49:48
  was in the porn shop, but it did later turn into material so.
• 49:52
  It works too. It has.
• 49:53
  Too So I Yeah, dude. OK, so here's I'll tell you this
• 49:57
  another another great story. This is something that happened
• 50:01
  not that long ago. It has.
• 50:03
  I haven't, I've, I've told it a couple of times, but I haven't
• 50:06
  got it fully worked out on first stage ready yet or whatever.
• 50:10
  But there's an absolutely true story.
• 50:13
  But my wife and I, we had one son, our daughter got in a
• 50:19
  serious relationship. She moved out and then that,
• 50:24
  that shit show fell apart. She came back home.
• 50:27
  Our middle son got married. He moved out.
• 50:32
  That shit show didn't work out. He came back home.
• 50:35
  My youngest, my youngest son just moved his girlfriend in
• 50:38
  with us. So there's always, there's
• 50:42
  always people at our house. It never goes.
• 50:44
  We're my wife's not been married.
• 50:46
  This is this is in July. We've been married 25 years.
• 50:51
  I'm tired after 25 years of having to have quiet, quiet sex.
• 50:56
  Yeah, you know what I mean? Like.
• 50:57
  Which is why your kids. Are just in the next room.
• 50:59
  Right. Which is, yeah, which is why you
• 51:01
  bought the sex swing for the door.
• 51:02
  So then if they knock on the door, you're you can they can
• 51:05
  tell you're busy, right? Yeah, yeah, you just hear Mom's
• 51:09
  ass thumping against the door, you know, to leave us alone.
• 51:12
  But but we so I'm tired of having quite.
• 51:17
  So every once in awhile what we'll do is I'll just call my
• 51:20
  wife and I'll say, hey, just meet me at the hotel.
• 51:25
  I already got us a room. We're staying at the hotel
• 51:27
  tonight. It's a hotel that's 12 miles
• 51:29
  from our house. But at least we can make as much
• 51:32
  monkey sounds as we want to. You know, it doesn't matter.
• 51:35
  Here's the problem is now we're older and when we were younger,
• 51:39
  we knew the proper order of things you want.
• 51:41
  You got date night like that, You go to the hotel, you shower,
• 51:46
  maybe shower together, maybe take a bath, do the deed, then
• 51:50
  go to dinner. And then when you come back, if
• 51:53
  you feel like doing more, you can, right?
• 51:55
  But now we're older and we were more concerned with getting a
• 51:59
  good meal in first. So we go and we eat and we eat
• 52:03
  good. Then we go to the hotel.
• 52:06
  Now we're full. You know, there's been a couple
• 52:09
  times when we didn't even have sex.
• 52:11
  We were just like fucking let's watch My £600 Life because
• 52:14
  that's all you can get on hotel television and we'll go to
• 52:17
  sleep. So, but on this time we were
• 52:21
  like, we were pretty hell bent on it.
• 52:22
  We're going to do the deed. I had brought her an out.
• 52:25
  I mean, we, we went all out on this one.
• 52:27
  And so my wife is we're, we're, we're, we're taking, we're
• 52:34
  participating in foreplay right now, which means that she's in a
• 52:36
  kneeling position and I'm in a standing position.
• 52:39
  OK, OK, we're all caught up. We're caught up.
• 52:42
  She and she's doing a phenomenal job, right?
• 52:45
  OK, she's doing a phenomenal job.
• 52:47
  Good job, wife. Yeah, Yeah, girl.
• 52:51
  I'll tell her that y'all said so.
• 52:52
  Now what she did is she got a little because she was because
• 52:57
  she was full. She got a little over
• 53:01
  overzealous and she went a little bit further than her
• 53:04
  abilities allow and it gagged her.
• 53:07
  Now don't worry that she didn't throw up on me.
• 53:10
  She did not throw up on me, but the gag caused her to backfire.
• 53:14
  So in the middle of a blowjob, she farted.
• 53:18
  This is hands down. This is hands down the funniest
• 53:23
  fucking thing I've ever witnessed in my life.
• 53:25
  I'm leaning against the wall laughing so fucking hard.
• 53:31
  She just gets up, walks over, gets in the bed.
• 53:34
  Now I know that she's embarrassed.
• 53:36
  I'm trying to calm myself down and stop laughing.
• 53:39
  I walk over, I get in bed. Next year I'm like babe, don't
• 53:41
  worry about it. Like at that time we're 24 years
• 53:45
  in, shit happens, don't worry about it.
• 53:47
  Which shit happens with? Probably a bad expression to
• 53:49
  use. But I was like don't worry about
• 53:51
  it stuff. Happens.
• 53:54
  And I was like, it's like, it's all right.
• 53:56
  And she goes, that's not even what I'm upset about.
• 53:58
  And I'm like, well, what is it? She goes How long before you
• 54:01
  tell this story on stage? That was her.
• 54:08
  Biggest. Concern, right?
• 54:10
  Now, as soon as she did something embarrassing, she was
• 54:12
  like, oh, the world is fixing to know about South.
• 54:14
  How? How?
• 54:14
  Long. How long did it take?
• 54:16
  How long did it take? The next week, the next fucking
• 54:20
  week and and how did that show and how did they talk?
• 54:22
  Alright guys. Yeah, and how, how did they
• 54:25
  receive it? Oh fuck, they loved it.
• 54:29
  Loved it. And that was why, without even
• 54:31
  polishing it up and telling it the right way, you know?
• 54:33
  Yeah. And you know why?
• 54:34
  Because it's real. I was.
• 54:35
  Basically, I just did it like I did with you guys, right?
• 54:37
  Yeah. But it's real, which most?
• 54:39
  Right, 90 I would say 9090% of the shit that I tell on stage,
• 54:45
  the stories I tell, it's all from real life.
• 54:47
  It's all shit that I've fucked up or found situations I found
• 54:51
  myself in or you know, whatever I tell us, I tell a stupid.
• 54:54
  This is a really kind of a filler joke where I'm because
• 54:57
  I'm building up the idea of like, I don't drink anymore And
• 55:01
  I'm like, you know, I ask people like, hey, who all is drinking
• 55:06
  good? Because my jokes are funnier
• 55:08
  when you get drunk. But then I go into I'm a water
• 55:11
  and sweet tea guy now. I had to slow down drinking
• 55:13
  because I got tired of waking up driving.
• 55:16
  That joke, always. That joke always hits hard and
• 55:20
  really just a filler joke. But it's also the truth.
• 55:24
  You can only wake up on an Interstate doing 70 so many
• 55:27
  times before you go hey maybe I should fucking slow down.
• 55:30
  Right, right. I'm living on luck.
• 55:34
  This, this whole time has just been luck.
• 55:36
  Yeah. So yeah.
• 55:38
  That's funny. Yeah, you use real life and shit
• 55:42
  to set it up. Yeah, so what's what's on the
• 55:44
  horizon for Matt Ferrell Shows and things like that?
• 55:47
  Where can people find you? All that kind of fun stuff.
• 55:52
  Now I'm I'm really, really working.
• 55:54
  I've got stuff booked all the way through May right now.
• 55:58
  Nice. Let's see.
• 56:02
  Is it on your website? It's just starting.
• 56:04
  Yeah, pull up his website there, Google.
• 56:06
  Dude, I don't have a website. I got to get a website dude.
• 56:09
  You got to get a, you got to get a website.
• 56:10
  I had a we got a website that we saw you last.
• 56:14
  I I know and it's badass. Mike did it.
• 56:17
  Mike, thank you. Yeah, actually, I've impressed
• 56:20
  myself. I did that.
• 56:22
  Really. Yeah.
• 56:24
  Did you do it with? Like it's a what's like, it's a
• 56:27
  company called Pod Page. Chris sent it to me in a text
• 56:31
  message one day. He said, hey, check this out.
• 56:33
  It's like geared towards podcasting.
• 56:35
  Well, like I do with a lot of things.
• 56:37
  It sat on the shelf for three months.
• 56:39
  You might want to check it out for yourself because it's super
• 56:42
  easy. Was it what did you say spelled
• 56:45
  POD page? Yep, POD page.com and it's
• 56:52
  geared towards podcasting, but I think it would work well towards
• 56:55
  what you're doing because you release a lot of shorts and you
• 56:58
  could release your specials on there too.
• 57:01
  Yeah, yeah. It pulls everything from your
• 57:04
  YouTube and anywhere you have content.
• 57:07
  If you have an RSS feed, it pulls it from that and YouTube
• 57:11
  directly to that page. Yeah, we'll have this, we'll
• 57:16
  have this. We'll have this plane in the
• 57:18
  background. Who's the who's?
• 57:20
  Who's the blonde chick? God Dang, look at those things.
• 57:23
  She, she used to be a radio DJ and and then she said she wanted
• 57:30
  to start a podcast with me. I would, she would invite me on.
• 57:33
  I would go and do, I'd be live on the radio with her once a
• 57:36
  week, right on just kind of comic release.
• 57:39
  And but also it gave me a free opportunity to promote whatever
• 57:42
  shows I had coming up. So it worked good.
• 57:43
  Hell, yeah. And then she went batshit crazy
• 57:46
  and started getting, like, real weird about shit.
• 57:48
  And I was like, you know what? I think I'm, I'm busy this week.
• 57:51
  I can't do it. And I just kept putting her off
• 57:52
  until eventually she went away. But she knows.
• 57:56
  She worked through all her stuff.
• 57:57
  She's sweet as can be. Our name is Kristen Rochelle.
• 58:00
  She now works for a big radio company.
• 58:02
  She travels all over the country, going to concerts,
• 58:04
  mostly country music. OK.
• 58:07
  But she, she knows, she's very she, she's very aware of her
• 58:12
  assets and makes them work for her.
• 58:17
  Gotcha. Well, you got to.
• 58:19
  So in in in March I got shows coming up.
• 58:22
  I'll be in Lubbock, TX, Oklahoma City, Topeka, KS, Maryville, MO,
• 58:32
  Dallas. I'll be in Dallas, TX.
• 58:34
  I've been in Dallas 2 nights. Is there is there a place to
• 58:38
  people to find your upcoming shows?
• 58:42
  Yeah, like they can go to any of my social media, which is all
• 58:46
  everything's Matt Farrell comedy across everything, TikTok,
• 58:50
  Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, it's all Matt Thrill comedy.
• 58:56
  I also have a link tree that they can go to that'll have
• 59:00
  something that's supposed to be done this weekend be updated
• 59:04
  with all of my currently booked shows that are coming up.
• 59:10
  And then like I said tonight I got to show a small show in
• 59:13
  Guthrie. OK, it's only about 3 hours from
• 59:15
  the house so I'll go and do that show and get to drive back home
• 59:18
  tonight sleeping home dead. I like that.
• 59:21
  Then I got a bunch of stuff coming up My my goal for this
• 59:25
  year is to I want to do 4 sold out theater shows is is my goal
• 59:34
  for this year. So I'll still do all the clubs
• 59:36
  and the pubs and the, the, the bars and the breweries and
• 59:41
  everything else. I'll do it all.
• 59:43
  But I've, I've got 4 theaters lined up.
• 59:46
  None of those dates are locked in yet.
• 59:48
  But my, my goal, I've got some new marketing strategies and
• 59:52
  ideas for promoting some shows. So I'm, I'm going to test those
• 59:57
  out. And that's that's my goal this
• 59:59
  year is to get 4 sold out theater shows for the year.
• 1:00:02
  What? What size crowd is that, Matt?
• 1:00:07
  The theaters I aim for are anywhere from 300 to 450 on
• 1:00:12
  seating. OK, That's a good side.
• 1:00:16
  Show like most of the like, yeah, like most, most downtowns
• 1:00:20
  have an old theater that they, that was, was the was probably
• 1:00:24
  the movie theater back in the day.
• 1:00:25
  And then they converted it to, you know, now it's where
• 1:00:28
  they're, they do plays and concerts and shit there.
• 1:00:31
  Those are the size theaters that I like.
• 1:00:33
  First of all, those, all of those places are always so cool.
• 1:00:36
  Those buildings have so much history in them and they're
• 1:00:38
  awesome. And the, the acoustics in them
• 1:00:41
  are always yeah, man. Hey dude, when you're in Mineral
• 1:00:45
  Wells, TX, you got to go crazy, you know what I mean?
• 1:00:50
  Oh, we lost Matt. That sucks.
• 1:00:54
  How'd we lose Matt? How'd we lose Matt?
• 1:00:58
  Hopefully he comes back on Matt's a good guy.
• 1:01:01
  Yeah. So Matt, Matt for all comedy.
• 1:01:03
  Just Google it. I I typed the Matt for all
• 1:01:05
  comedian and it populates all his stuff.
• 1:01:07
  He does need to get a website though and he needs to have a
• 1:01:09
  link to his shows because. Absolutely, because he's a lot
• 1:01:13
  bigger than. He thinks he is.
• 1:01:15
  I think he even gives himself credit for.
• 1:01:17
  Agreed. He's always working, man.
• 1:01:20
  And he's, he's a funny guy. That was that was good.
• 1:01:22
  He's a good guy. Oh.
• 1:01:22
  He's cracking me up, guy. So well, there's that.
• 1:01:27
  So go to go Google Matt federal comedy, you'll find him.
• 1:01:29
  You'll find his. I saw he's got YouTube, he's got
• 1:01:32
  Facebook, he's got TikTok, I'm sure he's got Instagram.
• 1:01:36
  Go do all those things, boys and girls and and check him out.
• 1:01:38
  He's booking up until May. So you, you heard some of the
• 1:01:42
  stuff here. He's a funny guy and a super
• 1:01:44
  nice guy and you know, so definitely check him out with
• 1:01:48
  all the and it's kind of cool. Now we're getting people coming
• 1:01:52
  back on. We have some other guests coming
• 1:01:54
  in February that are repeat guests.
• 1:01:56
  So that's cool because that shows that they value the time
• 1:01:59
  with us and, and they want to come back and share more of
• 1:02:02
  their stories. So I dig.
• 1:02:04
  I dig. And it starts to feel like
• 1:02:05
  family, Yeah. And it's cool to catch up like.
• 1:02:07
  We're create. We're creating.
• 1:02:09
  Family, family here. And Speaking of families, I
• 1:02:11
  think Matt's coming back on. Maybe, Maybe, maybe.
• 1:02:16
  Maybe. Who knows?
• 1:02:17
  You know, the internet's a weird, whacky thing.
• 1:02:20
  He's trying. It is.
• 1:02:21
  There he is. It's great when it works.
• 1:02:23
  It's great when it works. We.
• 1:02:24
  But just welcome back. Matt Farrell went away again.
• 1:02:26
  There he is. Yeah.
• 1:02:28
  So we. We plugged you, right?
• 1:02:30
  Yeah. We plugged you while you were
• 1:02:31
  gone. Yeah.
• 1:02:32
  You're super loud again. We plugged you while you were
• 1:02:34
  gone. How about now?
• 1:02:37
  Is that a little better? Now I can't hear Chris for some
• 1:02:45
  reason. There is that better?
• 1:02:49
  Yeah, Chris unplugged his microphone.
• 1:02:51
  That's why we can't hear Chris. Yeah, you're fine, man.
• 1:02:55
  OK. Chris is getting wacky like he
• 1:02:59
  did on stage sometimes. I know we had to make sure all
• 1:03:02
  his stuff was secured. He'd like to swing from the
• 1:03:07
  lighting trusses. Yeah, no.
• 1:03:08
  When I, when I, well, when I to my defense, when I, when I, when
• 1:03:11
  I, when I swing from the light Truss, I did not have the
• 1:03:13
  microphone with me. I left the microphone on the mic
• 1:03:16
  stand and then I went and grabbed the light Truss and
• 1:03:18
  started swinging. OK, I knew I was.
• 1:03:21
  I had enough common sense to know that corded microphone is
• 1:03:24
  not going to follow me up there. Now I could have, but then I put
• 1:03:28
  it got yelled at even more because I remember somebody
• 1:03:31
  yelled at me when I got down and went like, don't do that again.
• 1:03:34
  I'm like, OK, but it was fun. I didn't jump.
• 1:03:38
  I think it was something to the effect of our liability
• 1:03:41
  insurance does not cover things like that.
• 1:03:44
  The. Crowd.
• 1:03:45
  Liked it and that's all that mattered.
• 1:03:46
  It was, it was entertaining because, you know, here's a guy
• 1:03:49
  like, well, I think maybe I had the mic for a minute.
• 1:03:51
  I think I might have been singing and then put the mic
• 1:03:53
  down. I don't remember.
• 1:03:54
  And because it was before cell phones, we have no actual
• 1:03:57
  footage of that. So we're just going to assume I
• 1:03:59
  jumped up on the light trust with the mic singing one of our
• 1:04:02
  songs partly. And then just drop the
• 1:04:04
  microphone and put your arm up and kept swinging for a moment
• 1:04:07
  and then jump down. We'll call it that.
• 1:04:10
  If I remember the story correctly, you did the math in
• 1:04:14
  your head as you had it in your hand and dropped it on the stage
• 1:04:17
  and grabbed the other bar and started swinging.
• 1:04:20
  There you go. He was like, this isn't going to
• 1:04:22
  work Rock and. Roll.
• 1:04:25
  I did. Sorry.
• 1:04:26
  So I did a can you hear me? Yeah.
• 1:04:32
  OK, There you go. I did.
• 1:04:34
  AI did a corporate show not too long ago.
• 1:04:36
  I was going to tell you guys. I felt so bad for the sound guy.
• 1:04:39
  He was at A at a big casino here in Oklahoma.
• 1:04:41
  It was for I don't remember what it was for being like it was
• 1:04:45
  their, their Christmas party, but they didn't do it until the
• 1:04:48
  middle of January for some reason.
• 1:04:51
  And they they gave 1/4 had a cordless mic, which I prefer not
• 1:04:55
  to use. I prefer to use a corded mic,
• 1:04:57
  but they had it all set up, which is fine and it happened
• 1:05:01
  what always happens with corded mics.
• 1:05:03
  So I don't like to use them. The battery died and I and, and
• 1:05:07
  the guy I'm, I'm watching the sound guy, young kid.
• 1:05:10
  He's not. And it's a huge auditorium that
• 1:05:14
  at this casino, it's where all their big live events and stuff
• 1:05:17
  come in. And he's not he.
• 1:05:19
  He works for the sound guy, but he's not the main sound guy.
• 1:05:22
  But they figured he can handle it.
• 1:05:23
  And he, I could see him like he was turning red, He was sweating
• 1:05:27
  his head. He felt terrible.
• 1:05:28
  And yet she kept looking at me through the rails on the.
• 1:05:30
  He's like, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.
• 1:05:32
  I just put. I was like, hey, man, settle
• 1:05:34
  down. Don't worry about it.
• 1:05:35
  It's not your fault. Do you by chance have a corded
• 1:05:38
  mic? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 1:05:40
  I got 1. So he runs behind the stage and
• 1:05:41
  gets it and he, you know, uncoils it and throws it to me
• 1:05:45
  and I get it plugged in. I'm there we go.
• 1:05:47
  But I felt so bad for that kid because he felt like he had just
• 1:05:52
  screwed the pooch on this thing. And after my sit and everything
• 1:05:56
  was done, I went over and I visited him and I was like, hey,
• 1:05:57
  bud, you handled that. You handled that as good as you
• 1:06:00
  could. And now you know, if this
• 1:06:03
  situation ever arises again. Have that corded mic ready to
• 1:06:06
  go. I guess you know so.
• 1:06:11
  What would have been really funny with those story blunders?
• 1:06:13
  And. Stuff, right?
• 1:06:16
  Yeah. What?
• 1:06:17
  What would have been really funny with that show as a joke,
• 1:06:20
  right. He brought you the quarter
• 1:06:21
  microphone and it's a 3 foot cord.
• 1:06:30
  Yes. Now your work that you said,
• 1:06:33
  somehow I'll be smiling because I'll know that I gave Matt
• 1:06:36
  Farrell that idea. I had, I had thought about it in
• 1:06:42
  that moment after after I looked off the stage and I asked him if
• 1:06:46
  he had it corded Mike and he said yes.
• 1:06:49
  While he was working on getting that, I should have kept just
• 1:06:53
  mouthing into the cordless mic as though I was speaking and
• 1:06:57
  just let the audience go. And then as soon as he answered
• 1:07:00
  the corded Mike go, hey, my name is Matt Farrell.
• 1:07:02
  That's my time. Thank you.
• 1:07:03
  And then just hanging out so that way they didn't hear
• 1:07:05
  anything except for my walking off.
• 1:07:07
  That would have been that would. Have been yeah, yeah, yeah,
• 1:07:11
  yeah, yeah. But that's that's a good joke.
• 1:07:14
  That's a good joke. That's a good, that's a good
• 1:07:15
  story joke, which is cool because stories are funnier than
• 1:07:19
  material, I think. But you know, that's awesome.
• 1:07:22
  Yeah, I real. There's nothing funnier than
• 1:07:24
  real life, that's for sure. No, no, you can find Matt
• 1:07:28
  Ferrell again, just Matt Ferrell comedy.
• 1:07:30
  Google it. You'll find all these things.
• 1:07:31
  You do need to be able to website and you need to have a
• 1:07:33
  little thing that says shows. And then you need to have a
• 1:07:36
  little, another little tab that says where you can, you can buy
• 1:07:39
  tickets to your shows. Because then it's just like, oh,
• 1:07:41
  there's a show and I can buy a ticket right then and there.
• 1:07:44
  And then you can be a Ticketmaster for yourself,
• 1:07:47
  because you produce all your own stuff, right?
• 1:07:50
  Yeah, which I do. I do sell.
• 1:07:52
  I I sell most of my own tickets, I'll just like I create
• 1:07:56
  something for each one of them. I just make a link and send it.
• 1:07:58
  I use I use Square to do all my ticket sales and my merch sales
• 1:08:04
  and everything. I used to use a vibrite, but if
• 1:08:06
  vibrite when you do a ticket sales sometimes they'll wait
• 1:08:08
  three weeks before they send you your damn money.
• 1:08:12
  You might look into Square as far as the website because when
• 1:08:14
  I did Good News Arizona, the guy that that that edited all those
• 1:08:18
  shows and stuff down, we used a website based on Square and he
• 1:08:22
  RSS fed all the videos from Good News Arizona right to that.
• 1:08:26
  Kind of like what Mike did for the Chris and Mike show.
• 1:08:29
  It's a lot more work on your part, though.
• 1:08:33
  POD page is a lot less work. Oh, there you go, Part.
• 1:08:35
  Yeah. I would like to say that I'm
• 1:08:37
  some kind of fucking genius. But they do a lot of the work
• 1:08:40
  for you, right? I mean, you still have to know
• 1:08:43
  how to put it. You know how you want to look at
• 1:08:46
  it on the page, you can arrange it.
• 1:08:48
  But all that HTML stuff that you have to do with a lot of those
• 1:08:54
  pod page was the most simple for us because we're not in the
• 1:08:58
  business of building websites, right?
• 1:09:00
  You're in the business of comedy.
• 1:09:01
  We were in the business of doing music and podcasts.
• 1:09:04
  So yeah, I think that one will for you.
• 1:09:07
  You could do it yourself, is what I'm saying.
• 1:09:09
  You don't need anybody. There you go.
• 1:09:11
  So ignore the square thing and do do pod page Mike Matt, cuz
• 1:09:14
  that would be cool because then because then, well, cuz look at
• 1:09:17
  it cuz then we like when we're done, go to Google and see if
• 1:09:20
  mattferrell.com is available. Because we were, I was shocked,
• 1:09:23
  dude, when I went in and typed in Chris and mikeshow.com and
• 1:09:25
  nobody had it. Like legit, I'm like, you gotta
• 1:09:27
  be kidding me. I text Mike.
• 1:09:28
  I'm like, dude, holy shit, that's $11.00 a year.
• 1:09:32
  Boom, five years. Own it.
• 1:09:34
  So, you know, check. I would do that as soon as this
• 1:09:36
  is over, go to Google, see if you can buy your domain name,
• 1:09:40
  you know, and then you know, pod page, because I think I think a
• 1:09:43
  web like Mike will tell you all day long since having the the
• 1:09:46
  the web page at the website, we're we're we're having our own
• 1:09:50
  adult game of risk like Trump's having like, oh, I'm going to
• 1:09:53
  take Venezuela and I'm going to take Greenland and then I'm
• 1:09:55
  going to take Australia. So we can see it on our map
• 1:09:58
  where we're collecting all these new countries that are following
• 1:10:01
  us, which is really cool. Nice.
• 1:10:03
  So then you. Simply because you climbed so
• 1:10:06
  high in the SEO rankings on Google for the analytics.
• 1:10:09
  You know we own that space now. And everything we do on YouTube
• 1:10:12
  is all as right and everything, everything we, I drop on YouTube
• 1:10:15
  is all SEO driven. So it's, and it's, there's at
• 1:10:19
  least 10 keywords and 10 hashtags everything we drop.
• 1:10:21
  So it's, it's, it's continually feeding the Google spiders and
• 1:10:25
  the, and the Bing spiders and all the other online spiders
• 1:10:27
  that are out there searching for shit.
• 1:10:29
  So it just helps us grow granically, which is what we
• 1:10:31
  want. We don't want to pay for our
• 1:10:32
  growth because that's fake. We want to be true.
• 1:10:35
  But we have the growth wise. So, so I would challenge you,
• 1:10:38
  Matt, to get that done. Let us know when it's done.
• 1:10:41
  We'll have you back on the show and we'll talk about the
• 1:10:43
  mattfarrell.com page. I will get on it.
• 1:10:48
  I know it's something I've been needing to do for a long time.
• 1:10:50
  It's I'm just not real good at sitting still at a computer for
• 1:10:53
  very long. So it that, you know, but I was,
• 1:10:56
  I was going to pitch this real quick.
• 1:10:58
  I, I do a thing Monday through Friday.
• 1:11:01
  I, I started doing a basically a satire news segment.
• 1:11:07
  I just call it pop. I just, I just call it top news.
• 1:11:10
  I upload it to YouTube every day.
• 1:11:12
  I try to keep it under, under 3 minutes.
• 1:11:15
  So that way it always uploads as a short.
• 1:11:18
  And it's, it's, it's, it's funny because I do talk a lot of shit
• 1:11:22
  about Trump and I talk and, and I do try to keep it satire and
• 1:11:29
  funny and, you know, on the lighter side of things.
• 1:11:32
  But sometimes shit happened. You gotta go, man.
• 1:11:34
  I just can't find anything funny today.
• 1:11:36
  But here's some things that I feel like need to be said.
• 1:11:38
  So sometimes I, I, I go a little bit more on the serious side,
• 1:11:44
  but I, for the most part, I try to keep it, you know, light
• 1:11:47
  hearted and fun. And that's what I've been
• 1:11:49
  putting a lot of my focus into is trying to build that YouTube
• 1:11:52
  page. It's been doing pretty good with
• 1:11:55
  those because shorts, they, you know, they push those for you
• 1:11:59
  and it pops off. You know, I average anywhere
• 1:12:01
  between anywhere between 650 and 1500 views per on those.
• 1:12:09
  I've been doing pretty good. But it's something I've and I've
• 1:12:11
  had a lot of fun with it. I like making fun of the news.
• 1:12:13
  I like making fun of the the shit that's going on right now.
• 1:12:17
  And sometimes if you can, if you can find a way to make it funny,
• 1:12:20
  there's some things you just like.
• 1:12:21
  Yeah, I just don't know. There's nothing funny.
• 1:12:25
  So we just got to skip over that one.
• 1:12:28
  But it's been a lot of fun. I do.
• 1:12:29
  And it was something that the key to social media and all the
• 1:12:33
  signs is consistency. You got to post regularly all
• 1:12:37
  the time. So I was trying to find
• 1:12:38
  something that I could stay on top of and I was like, hey, I'll
• 1:12:41
  just do a news deal and I'll just do it Monday through
• 1:12:43
  Friday. So I'm gearing and I do it first
• 1:12:45
  thing in the morning and I get it uploaded and I share it to a
• 1:12:48
  bunch of people. But so that way guaranteed I'm
• 1:12:51
  pumping out at least five pieces of content every week, so.
• 1:12:55
  I think it has been. Helping and working.
• 1:12:57
  Are you putting on the Facebook and Instagram too?
• 1:13:01
  I I share some of them on there, I need to go ahead and start
• 1:13:05
  posting, but I wanna just share the link so that way everybody
• 1:13:08
  has to go through YouTube to actually watch it.
• 1:13:12
  There you go. That's cool.
• 1:13:14
  You know what I mean? That's cool.
• 1:13:15
  Yeah. So anyway, that's my newest
• 1:13:18
  project that I've been doing. Yes, and pod page will help you
• 1:13:21
  with that, Mike says. Yes, because all the stuff that
• 1:13:26
  he uploads to YouTube goes to the website and if you look at
• 1:13:30
  it through the website, you you get the Google Analytics data
• 1:13:34
  and he gets the YouTube hit. Nice.
• 1:13:37
  So it's a double Wham, yeah, Which is?
• 1:13:38
  Cool. Hell yeah.
• 1:13:40
  So there you go. So that's Matt Ferrell.
• 1:13:42
  You're gonna check it out. Yeah.
• 1:13:44
  Yeah. So this is Matt Ferrell the
• 1:13:45
  comedy, the comedian, the funny guy.
• 1:13:47
  Check him out. Matt Ferrell comedy.
• 1:13:48
  Google it. You'll find him everywhere.
• 1:13:50
  I typed in Matt Ferrell, comedian, and I got all your
• 1:13:52
  things. So either one of those works,
• 1:13:55
  he's doing shows booked out till May right now.
• 1:13:57
  So you definitely want to check him out, go see his shows, go
• 1:13:59
  have a laugh. You know, maybe go to a date
• 1:14:01
  night, go to a hotel, you know, take a shower with your spouse
• 1:14:04
  and, and go have a nice light meal and then go laugh with Matt
• 1:14:06
  Farrell. And then go back to your hotel
• 1:14:09
  room with the sex swing that he's going to send you a link
• 1:14:11
  for for his new team, new sponsorship account.
• 1:14:15
  And then you can use that at the hotel room on the door and and
• 1:14:18
  make everybody wonder what the hell is who's knocking on my
• 1:14:20
  door? Because if you have those motels
• 1:14:21
  with the doors all outside, it's going to echo.
• 1:14:23
  So you're going to start opening the door trying to figure out
• 1:14:25
  who's knocking on the door and nobody's going to be there.
• 1:14:28
  So that'll be fun and he can go home and and tell your kids that
• 1:14:32
  story. So again, we close the show with
• 1:14:35
  this every time. If you're feeling sad, suicidal
• 1:14:37
  or depressed, go find somebody to talk to.
• 1:14:40
  Go go scream in a pillow. Go run, go work out, go
• 1:14:42
  exercise, do something to help change your mindset.
• 1:14:45
  If you can't find somebody to talk to you and you can't get
• 1:14:47
  out of that glitch, then text 988.
• 1:14:48
  Somebody's there standing by waiting to talk to you, to help
• 1:14:51
  you understand what you're going through and talk you off that
• 1:14:53
  Cliff. You are going to be missed if
• 1:14:55
  you leave this world today and not wake up in it tomorrow
• 1:14:58
  because you will leave a hole in somebody else's heart because
• 1:15:00
  somebody does love you, even though you think they don't.
• 1:15:03
  You don't think they do, Matt? You want to leave us with a
• 1:15:05
  funny no pressure? Man, I, I'll tell you this, I
• 1:15:12
  this is the thing I always tell people is that the, I think the
• 1:15:15
  biggest breakdown between me and my kids is my kids didn't grow
• 1:15:19
  up poor like I did. And I don't, I don't mean I
• 1:15:22
  didn't get everything I wanted for Christmas pour.
• 1:15:24
  I grew up sticks and Dick pour. When it was nice weather you it
• 1:15:28
  was sticks, But if it was raining outside, you stayed in
• 1:15:31
  your room and played with your well, you get it.
• 1:15:39
  Thank you so much, Matt. Yeah, man, I appreciate you
• 1:15:42
  guys. You guys are awesome.
• 1:15:43
  I enjoy. Doing this, we appreciate a good
• 1:15:44
  time. Chris, be careful with that
• 1:15:46
  pineapple juice. I.
• 1:15:48
  Will, I will thank you. My wife looked at me funny when
• 1:15:52
  I was talking about that because she took the day off to go to
• 1:15:54
  the the funeral today. And and and so she was in the
• 1:15:56
  laundry room and, and as soon as I hit the pineapple juice thing,
• 1:15:58
  I kind of looked over there to look on her face was like, what
• 1:16:00
  are you talking about that in the sex screen?
• 1:16:02
  So I got some spanning to do love you, brother.
• 1:16:07
  Love you, Matt. You're a good, you're a good
• 1:16:08
  human. We, we, we totally appreciate
• 1:16:10
  your time, man. We know it's valuable and we,
• 1:16:11
  we, we thank you for taking that time out of your day for us.
• 1:16:14
  It means the world to us. So.
• 1:16:15
  And for all your. Help.
• 1:16:16
  Yeah, absolutely appreciate you guys.
• 1:16:17
  Thank. You all we're going to
• 1:16:19
  reciprocate we're going to reciprocate for sure yeah
• 1:16:21
  everybody have a great day until next time we'll talk to you soon
• 1:16:23
  we'll. See you.