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Transcript

Beyond The New Car: Real Talk on Ownership with Shahe Koulloukian · Let's Get Naked

0:00
SPEAKER_03: Hey everyone, I'm Anne.
0:01
SPEAKER_03: Welcome to the Let's Get Naked podcast, where we dive deep into vulnerability.
0:06
SPEAKER_03: In this space, we'll explore what triggers us, uncover the patterns holding us back, and discover how to take charge of our own growth.
0:14
SPEAKER_03: If you're ready to dig in, be vulnerable, and face the tough stuff, then buckle up.
0:19
SPEAKER_03: It's time to get naked.
0:22
SPEAKER_03: All right, let's just call this out.
0:25
SPEAKER_03: A lot of people aren't living, they're performing.
0:28
SPEAKER_03: Running on a hamster wheel, feeding a version of themselves that looks good from the outside, but feels like absolute chaos underneath.
0:36
SPEAKER_03: And the wild part, who are you even performing for?
0:40
SPEAKER_03: Seriously, who?
0:42
SPEAKER_03: Because everyone else is so wrapped up in their own life, their own stress, their own ego, they wouldn't know if you pulled up in a Benz, a Pinto, or a horse-drawn carriage.
0:52
SPEAKER_03: They're not thinking about you like that.
0:55
SPEAKER_03: But here you are, losing sleep, making decisions, big ones, expensive ones, to maintain a perception that nobody is actually tracking.
1:06
SPEAKER_03: That's the trap.
1:07
SPEAKER_03: And one of the most common ways this shows up, keeping up with the Joneses purchases, the car, the upgrade.
1:17
SPEAKER_03: The thing that makes you feel like, okay, now I'm where I'm supposed to be, for about five minutes.
1:25
SPEAKER_03: Because right after that comes the emotional hangover accompanied by financial unrest.
1:32
SPEAKER_03: That quiet, nagging weight in your chest, where you're doing the math again, running scenarios, hoping nothing unexpected hits, because now you've tied your identity to something that requires constant feeding.
1:47
SPEAKER_03: And if your income isn't rock solid, that's not freedom, that's pressure with leather seats.
1:54
SPEAKER_03: And it's exhausting.
1:56
SPEAKER_03: But we don't talk about that part.
1:58
SPEAKER_03: We just keep performing, keep upgrading, keep proving, keep feeding the monster.
2:04
SPEAKER_03: Meanwhile, your mind is fried, your body is stressed, and your spirit is like, what are we doing?
2:09
SPEAKER_03: Because if you're not solid internally, it doesn't matter what you buy, it doesn't matter what you drive, you're still going to feel off.
2:18
SPEAKER_03: And here's where it gets dangerous, not just for you, but for everyone watching.
2:23
SPEAKER_03: You're passing this pattern down to your kiddos because when you perform, you normalize the performance.
2:30
SPEAKER_03: Now someone else feels like they have to keep up with you.
2:33
SPEAKER_03: You've just turned yourself into the Joneses, and just like that, we've got a whole bunch of people building lives on unstable foundations, mirroring each other's stress, and calling it success.
2:45
SPEAKER_03: That's a broken system.
2:47
SPEAKER_03: Real leadership isn't ego, it's service.
2:50
SPEAKER_03: It's not about looking impressive, it's about being useful in a world full of loud decorations.
2:55
SPEAKER_03: And that requires something most people avoid: real honesty, savage self-awareness, and the willingness to stop performing, even when it's uncomfortable.
3:06
SPEAKER_03: So today, we're digging into all of it: the psychology, the money, the identity, and that emotional hangover nobody warns you about, tied to something as simple and as loaded as a car.
3:20
SPEAKER_03: And if you've ever left felt that tension between how things look and how they actually feel, yeah, you're gonna hear yourself in this one.
3:28
SPEAKER_03: Let's get into it.
3:29
SPEAKER_03: Today I'm stripping it all off with Shahe Kuz.
3:33
SPEAKER_03: Please say your last name.
3:35
SPEAKER_03: Thank you so much.
3:36
SPEAKER_03: Um, he is a best-selling author of Car Confidential, host of The Car Confidential Show, and a fearless voice for smarter car ownership.
3:44
SPEAKER_03: For more than 30 years, he's helped people see past the hype, stop buying cars emotionally, and start owning them intelligently.
3:52
SPEAKER_03: Welcome so much for to the show, and thank you for the help with your last name.
3:55
SPEAKER_03: I didn't want to butcher that.
3:56
SPEAKER_03: No worries, thank you for having me.
3:57
SPEAKER_00: I'm excited to be here.
3:58
SPEAKER_03: Absolutely.
3:59
SPEAKER_03: So um Shahe has so much to offer.
4:02
SPEAKER_03: We were chatting before the show, and I'm really excited about this episode because while he brings a lot of experience with the car industry, there's so much more to it.
4:11
SPEAKER_03: And um, and I just I just love this topic so much.
4:15
SPEAKER_03: So yeah.
4:16
SPEAKER_00: It's a great topic, and it's there for everybody.
4:18
SPEAKER_00: It it's not biased to one gender, one age, or nationality, or even country.
4:24
SPEAKER_00: Every single person in this world has a car and has dealt with all the same scenarios.
4:28
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, exactly.
4:29
SPEAKER_03: So let's start by you telling me a little bit about yourself, uh, and then we'll just kind of dive in from there about uh, you know, the car stuff and the things that you're doing and and everything else that you're that you're doing in this lifetime.
4:39
SPEAKER_00: So basically, um I'm Armenian by nationality, born in Beirut Lebanon, and my father was a cobbler of four uh generations.
4:47
SPEAKER_00: I learned the trade, he wanted me to learn it, but I it didn't take, so I ended up becoming a mechanic instead.
4:53
SPEAKER_00: Uh been very fortunate and blessed to have lived in seven different countries.
4:57
SPEAKER_00: My mom was a translator for the UN, so I speak six languages fluently, and uh basically I've become a consumer of life.
5:04
SPEAKER_00: I uh my dad had a great saying, he said, shake every hand and listen to every voice, because one day, when you become somebody, someone's gonna come to you and say, I love your personality, I love who you are.
5:17
SPEAKER_00: Remember at that compliment moment, you unknowingly stole small pieces of everyone that made them into who you are.
5:25
SPEAKER_03: So beautiful.
5:26
SPEAKER_03: Not you.
5:27
SPEAKER_03: What a what a dad you are.
5:29
SPEAKER_03: Oh, yeah.
5:29
SPEAKER_03: Good for you.
5:30
SPEAKER_00: Very, very fortunate.
5:31
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
5:31
SPEAKER_00: And so that is what I've felt like, okay, this is who I am, and I'm not meaning to take it.
5:38
SPEAKER_00: So I meet some guy named John, he tells me a joke, and one thing he said, or one quote, or one comment, I'm like, I like that.
5:45
SPEAKER_00: And it just, I don't write it, I just take it in, and all right, that's good.
5:49
SPEAKER_00: And here I am at 15, and then now at 18, that comes up and I remember it, and I use it in my own words, and now it becomes me.
5:57
SPEAKER_00: And then so on and so forth.
5:58
SPEAKER_00: So um I lived in, like I said, many different countries, and when I moved to Arizona, I started working at a dealership and uh became a master certified technician for Volvo, strictly for Volvo.
6:11
SPEAKER_00: Uh and then I opened up my shop 31 years ago, started working on pretty much everything.
6:17
SPEAKER_00: Uh but I knew from the very beginning when I was 13 years old, working in my uncle's garage, um something very profound happened.
6:28
SPEAKER_00: Uh, it's almost like a career PTS, if I may.
6:33
SPEAKER_00: He calls me, he says, Shahe, come here.
6:36
SPEAKER_00: Yes, Uncle Mike, what's up?
6:37
SPEAKER_00: Here's the keys.
6:38
SPEAKER_00: Get in the tow truck, go down the road, there's a guy stuck on the corner.
6:42
SPEAKER_00: I'm shy of 14 years old.
6:46
SPEAKER_00: Never driven, no license.
6:48
SPEAKER_00: The tow truck is an old Ford that my feet will not touch anywhere.
6:54
SPEAKER_00: It's snowing.
6:56
SPEAKER_00: It's February.
6:58
SPEAKER_00: Snowflakes like the size of prunes, like huge.
7:03
SPEAKER_00: So I say, Uncle Mike, I he says, Don't argue with me, just get in the truck and go down there and see what's up.
7:10
SPEAKER_00: I get in the truck, crank it, started over, I my feet can't touch.
7:14
SPEAKER_00: Before I could say anything, he already knows.
7:16
SPEAKER_00: He grabs old school, whoever remembers a phone book, grabs two phone books, puts it under me, and says, now reach.
7:22
SPEAKER_00: Okay, I got it.
7:23
SPEAKER_00: He says, Okay, go down here.
7:24
SPEAKER_00: There's a road called Baltimore Pike.
7:26
SPEAKER_00: I'll never forget.
7:27
SPEAKER_00: Let's get to Baltimore Pike.
7:28
SPEAKER_00: There's a the diner on the corner corner called Blue Comet.
7:31
SPEAKER_00: He's waiting for you right there.
7:34
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
7:35
SPEAKER_00: So I get in and I put it in drive, and I'm moving what feels like to be maybe one mile an hour.
7:44
SPEAKER_00: The the road is powdered with thick snow.
7:47
SPEAKER_00: It's snowing.
7:48
SPEAKER_00: I I'm not, I mean, like really like movie, movie style snowing.
7:52
SPEAKER_00: I'm scared to death.
7:53
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
7:53
SPEAKER_00: So I'm driving and I can barely see in front of me the white, the one wiper blades going back and forth.
7:59
SPEAKER_00: And I finally get there, and there's this guy standing next to a phone booth in the snow, all jacketed up with gloves and a hoodie.
8:07
SPEAKER_00: And I get out and he looks at me like, What the?
8:12
unknown: Who are you?
8:12
SPEAKER_00: Who are you?
8:13
SPEAKER_00: I said, My uncle Mike sent me.
8:16
SPEAKER_00: He says, And what are you supposed to do?
8:19
SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
8:20
SPEAKER_00: Do you have the keys to the car?
8:21
SPEAKER_00: He says, Yeah.
8:22
SPEAKER_00: He gives me the keys.
8:23
SPEAKER_00: It's an old Chevelle.
8:25
SPEAKER_00: I start it, I go to start it, and it won't, it just cranks and cranks.
8:29
SPEAKER_00: I knew at that age the basics that you sprayed in the throttle body that might just gotten moisture in there.
8:35
SPEAKER_00: So I, whatever my uncle taught me, I'm like, I'll just do that.
8:37
SPEAKER_00: So I go to the truck, I open up, I open up the hood, I remove the air filter housing, and I spray it in there, and I tell him, get in the vehicle and see if you could start it.
8:47
SPEAKER_00: And he cranks it over and it starts.
8:49
SPEAKER_00: Now let me tell you something.
8:50
SPEAKER_00: If you ever wanted to imagine or visualize what it'd be like willing winning the lottery, that was it.
8:57
SPEAKER_01: Oh, I bet.
8:58
SPEAKER_01: I bet.
8:59
SPEAKER_00: That was it for me.
9:00
SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, I felt so high on like, wow, I can't believe it started.
9:06
SPEAKER_00: And then he gives me this look like, where the hell did you come from?
9:10
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
9:10
SPEAKER_00: Like, meanwhile, what I observed was that he was in his probably early to mid-30s.
9:19
SPEAKER_00: Now, at that moment, I didn't think or judge to say, Well, how come you didn't know that?
9:24
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
9:24
SPEAKER_00: I just, I, I'm like, okay, I did it.
9:26
SPEAKER_00: And he's, and I closed the hood and I said, My uncle said you got to come back to the shop so you can settle up.
9:32
SPEAKER_00: He goes, Hold on a second.
9:33
SPEAKER_00: Let me go to let me go to my glove box.
9:35
SPEAKER_00: He goes in his glove box, he grabs like$3 and he gives it to me as a tip.
9:38
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, oh no, I can't.
9:39
SPEAKER_00: He goes, No, no, no, take this.
9:40
SPEAKER_00: I said, okay.
9:41
SPEAKER_00: So I took it and I thanked him.
9:43
SPEAKER_00: And I get back to the shop.
9:44
SPEAKER_00: I don't know how I did it, but I got back to the shop.
9:47
SPEAKER_00: And I get out.
9:48
SPEAKER_00: Now I'm hoping or wishing that my uncle's gonna say, Wow, big hug.
9:52
SPEAKER_00: Good for you.
9:53
SPEAKER_00: I can't believe you did it.
9:54
SPEAKER_00: I tested you.
9:56
SPEAKER_00: He says, put the keys back and get back to work.
9:58
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
10:00
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
10:01
SPEAKER_00: Um, no thank you, no what happened.
10:04
SPEAKER_00: So now the gentleman shows up, he settles up with my uncle for what's called back then roadside service, and life goes on.
10:11
SPEAKER_00: From that moment on, I realized that pretty much every car owner knows to get in, to start it, put the seatbelt on, AC heater, and drive.
10:26
SPEAKER_00: Nothing more.
10:27
SPEAKER_00: Nothing more.
10:28
SPEAKER_00: And as time went by, here I am, 58 years old, 31 years owning my own shop, 47 in the entire biz from when I was 13, 14, to me uh knowing 100%.
10:41
SPEAKER_00: And I've tested it.
10:42
SPEAKER_00: I've asked my customers.
10:44
SPEAKER_00: So, what does your car weigh?
10:47
SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
10:48
SPEAKER_00: What size is your tires?
10:52
SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
10:53
SPEAKER_00: What kind of oil does it take?
10:56
SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
10:58
SPEAKER_00: So then what do you know about the car?
11:00
SPEAKER_00: You might ask.
11:01
SPEAKER_00: Well, it's blue.
11:03
SPEAKER_00: It's got a sunroof.
11:05
SPEAKER_00: I have Bluetooth.
11:06
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, great.
11:08
SPEAKER_00: Anything more?
11:09
SPEAKER_00: No.
11:10
SPEAKER_00: Here's a last little silly stupid question.
11:13
SPEAKER_00: Do you have a spare tire?
11:15
SPEAKER_00: Dead.
11:18
SPEAKER_00: Now for the follow-up.
11:20
SPEAKER_00: I've known you for all these years.
11:22
SPEAKER_00: You bought it since day one.
11:24
SPEAKER_00: May I do the math and say you've owned it for eight years?
11:27
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
11:28
SPEAKER_00: So for eight years, I just asked you a simple question: does it have a spare tire?
11:32
SPEAKER_00: And you just looked at me with no answer.
11:34
SPEAKER_00: So you've never even opened to see if you had a spare tire.
11:37
SPEAKER_00: Oh, I didn't need to.
11:38
SPEAKER_00: I have roadside service.
11:40
SPEAKER_00: Okay, you have roadside, but it's your car.
11:42
SPEAKER_00: You paid for it.
11:44
SPEAKER_00: Did you look to see if it has a spare?
11:46
SPEAKER_00: No.
11:47
SPEAKER_00: That in itself is the first log in the fire of when someone says, I got ripped off.
11:54
SPEAKER_00: Damn mechanics, they're crooks.
11:57
SPEAKER_00: You helped create it.
11:58
unknown: Yeah.
11:59
SPEAKER_00: You helped create it.
12:00
SPEAKER_03: You're part of the problem.
12:01
SPEAKER_00: The owner's manual is in the glove box.
12:03
SPEAKER_00: You know, that dirty old thing that under the gum that you got in there?
12:07
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
12:08
SPEAKER_00: It's there as an index.
12:09
SPEAKER_00: Flip it to the back.
12:10
SPEAKER_00: It's alphabetized.
12:12
SPEAKER_00: R for radio.
12:13
SPEAKER_00: There it is.
12:13
SPEAKER_00: Page 75.
12:14
SPEAKER_00: I know what to do.
12:16
SPEAKER_00: O for oil.
12:16
SPEAKER_00: I know what kind of oil it takes.
12:18
SPEAKER_00: None of that.
12:19
SPEAKER_00: Why?
12:19
SPEAKER_00: Because we're so detrimentally focused on inconvenience.
12:24
SPEAKER_00: It's inconvenient for me.
12:25
SPEAKER_00: I don't have time.
12:26
SPEAKER_00: I don't have time to do any of that.
12:27
SPEAKER_00: I just fix it.
12:29
SPEAKER_00: Okay, we fix it.
12:30
SPEAKER_00: And then you find out oh, I got ripped off.
12:35
SPEAKER_00: Because you fixed something you didn't need.
12:37
SPEAKER_00: So in my mindset empowerment that I provide for everyone, not just my customer, anyone that calls, I always say, learn to ask the questions.
12:46
SPEAKER_00: It's your car.
12:48
SPEAKER_00: Oh, well, you need brakes.
12:49
SPEAKER_00: Stop and say, Do I need them now?
12:52
SPEAKER_00: Whoa, that changes the dynamics.
12:55
SPEAKER_00: Just that one, do I need them now?
12:57
SPEAKER_00: Because you're a female.
12:58
SPEAKER_00: Oh, okay, all right.
12:59
SPEAKER_00: You're not a mechanic, all right.
13:00
SPEAKER_00: You're older, all right.
13:01
SPEAKER_00: Fear factor.
13:02
SPEAKER_00: Oh, if you don't fix it, you're gonna crash and burn.
13:04
SPEAKER_00: Okay, you said I need brakes.
13:05
SPEAKER_00: Do I need them now?
13:06
SPEAKER_00: Now you've taken away that power by making that individual go, well, I need to, I can't just lie.
13:13
SPEAKER_00: Well, you could wait a little bit.
13:15
SPEAKER_00: Oh, I can wait.
13:16
SPEAKER_00: Oh, okay, because 30 seconds ago, your face and your your gestures made it look like I was gonna crash and die.
13:23
SPEAKER_00: That in itself is the the simmer to the boil of car ownership.
13:28
SPEAKER_03: There's a lot of stuff that goes into it.
13:30
SPEAKER_03: As I was reading your questionnaire this morning, it was it was pretty pretty insightful to me because I didn't realize how performative cars are for people.
13:41
SPEAKER_03: And when you talk a little bit in your questionnaire about different ego things and leadership is not, you know, is being in service and not ego and just all of these things, it got my mind just racing in such a beautiful way.
13:51
SPEAKER_03: Of I didn't realize how much is tied into that.
13:54
SPEAKER_03: And then I also have been on this kick lately of um the keeping up with the Joneses because I think that that's a big part of what's wrong with our society right now, is it's like, oh, well, this is what 30 should look like.
14:05
SPEAKER_03: I should have my car, I should have my house, I should have my 2.3 kids, I should have all of these things.
14:09
SPEAKER_03: Uh, and I call BS on that because I think living debt-free is way better than you know, whatever fancy car is that you drive and all of the things.
14:17
SPEAKER_03: And so you have got to have seen it all over the course of you know, your shop ownership and everything.
14:23
SPEAKER_00: I have seen it to where I could not help but break down the stupid, ridiculous vanity.
14:30
SPEAKER_00: I'll give you an example without dropping names.
14:32
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
14:33
SPEAKER_00: Very high-end lawyer, predominant lawyer here in the valley.
14:36
SPEAKER_00: There's a client of mine who calls and says, You're gonna love this Shah Hey.
14:40
SPEAKER_00: I just bought myself a twin turbo.
14:42
SPEAKER_00: I am freaking excited.
14:44
SPEAKER_00: Awesome, very happy for you.
14:46
SPEAKER_00: You work on those, right?
14:48
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, but you just bought it.
14:49
SPEAKER_00: It's brand new, it's under warranty.
14:50
SPEAKER_00: No, no, I'm talking about oil changes and stuff like that.
14:52
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, of course, I got you.
14:53
SPEAKER_00: Got it.
14:54
SPEAKER_00: All right.
14:55
SPEAKER_00: So he comes in for his first oil change, and we do the oil change, and it's roughly$300.
15:02
SPEAKER_00: A lot less than what the dealership charge, but nonetheless, still he's like, Jesus, you guys.
15:07
SPEAKER_00: And then the sarcasm to cover up what he knows is BS.
15:13
SPEAKER_00: Jesus, great, you guys are trying to buy a boat?
15:18
SPEAKER_00: The little bites and and stabs of like unnecessary sarcasm where he knows that I've always been fair and I've always looked out for him.
15:27
SPEAKER_00: So I couldn't help but say, All right, you want to play that game, let's play that game.
15:31
SPEAKER_00: So, yeah, it's that's the price.
15:33
SPEAKER_00: I'm so sorry, but hey, you're the owner of the Porsche.
15:35
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
15:35
SPEAKER_00: But I got a silly question for you.
15:37
SPEAKER_00: Shoot, got it.
15:39
SPEAKER_00: You live in the same address?
15:40
SPEAKER_00: I look up on my computer.
15:42
SPEAKER_00: That's the address you live in, right?
15:43
SPEAKER_00: Oh, of course, yeah, I love my house.
15:44
SPEAKER_00: Why?
15:45
SPEAKER_00: It's a gated community, right?
15:47
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, where are you going with this?
15:49
SPEAKER_00: Well, you're a lawyer, but we're we're debating, right?
15:52
SPEAKER_00: So, how many speed bumps are from your house to the end of the gate when you get out of the gated community?
16:01
SPEAKER_00: Shy, I don't just just answer.
16:04
SPEAKER_00: Amuse me.
16:05
SPEAKER_00: Um, I don't know.
16:07
SPEAKER_00: Six, seven, got it.
16:09
SPEAKER_00: And when you get out of your gated community, did you take the 51 to come downtown where your office is?
16:14
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
16:14
SPEAKER_00: Is there a better route?
16:15
SPEAKER_00: No, just asking.
16:16
SPEAKER_00: Got it.
16:17
SPEAKER_00: So let's backtrack.
16:19
SPEAKER_00: Where in that 15 mile an hour from your front door to the gate and seven speed bumps, are you using the twin turbos?
16:29
SPEAKER_00: Where in the name of Christ are you using the twin turbos on the 51 when you can't go more than 65 miles an hour and you as a lawyer don't want to kill and get sued yourself or other people?
16:42
SPEAKER_00: Where in the name of Christ is that happening?
16:44
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it's not.
16:45
SPEAKER_00: So now please tell me that you're taking it on the track to speed.
16:49
SPEAKER_00: No.
16:51
SPEAKER_00: You're still married.
16:52
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
16:53
SPEAKER_00: You still have the two girls.
16:55
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
16:56
SPEAKER_00: So tell me where this makes sense.
16:59
SPEAKER_00: God bless you, you got the money.
17:01
SPEAKER_00: Good for you.
17:02
SPEAKER_00: But I'm going back to your words.
17:04
SPEAKER_00: Jesus Christ, I'm trying to help you buy a cabin or what?
17:07
SPEAKER_00: $300 for an oil change.
17:09
SPEAKER_00: That in itself tells me already you can't afford this car.
17:12
SPEAKER_00: I don't give a shit if you're a lawyer or not.
17:14
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
17:15
SPEAKER_00: So now get off your vanity horse and tell me why you bought a twin turbo.
17:20
SPEAKER_00: Because you want.
17:22
SPEAKER_00: You don't need, you want.
17:25
SPEAKER_00: So that in itself is mind-boggling to me, where people repeat it over and over again.
17:32
SPEAKER_00: Meanwhile, he told me backstories of how excited his girls were, the 13 and the 17-year-old that were in the car feeling the on the on the freeway of see, dad's got a super nice, see how fast it's going, girls?
17:46
SPEAKER_00: Oh, by the way, you better wear your seatbelt.
17:47
SPEAKER_00: You got you never, and then you're you're contradicting it by giving advice of never to do this.
17:53
SPEAKER_00: What come on now?
17:54
SPEAKER_00: Where what planet are we living in?
17:56
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
17:56
SPEAKER_00: Right?
17:57
SPEAKER_00: That also comes with a woman who says, I'm getting bad bad gas mileage.
18:02
SPEAKER_00: Shy, I think I need a tune-up.
18:05
SPEAKER_00: Well, 2019 vehicles don't need tune-ups, you just do services.
18:11
SPEAKER_00: And you only have 60,000 miles on the car, so you're not doing for two.
18:14
SPEAKER_00: Well, I'm getting shit gas mileage.
18:16
SPEAKER_00: Got it.
18:16
SPEAKER_00: You have an eight-passenger vehicle that does 11 miles to the gallon.
18:21
SPEAKER_00: P.S.
18:22
SPEAKER_00: You're the only one in this suburban.
18:25
SPEAKER_00: Oh, and maybe your gym bag and your cup of coffee and your cell phone.
18:30
SPEAKER_00: Where are you using this eight-passenger vehicle at?
18:33
SPEAKER_00: Well, I just love sitting high.
18:36
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
18:37
SPEAKER_00: But where does this come into now you're here asking me to spend money?
18:42
SPEAKER_00: I need a tune-up.
18:43
SPEAKER_00: You don't need a tune-up.
18:44
SPEAKER_00: You need to sell this vehicle and go back to buying what you really need functionally, not wanted because it look makes you feel big and powerful.
18:54
SPEAKER_00: This is this is it.
18:55
SPEAKER_00: This is every day.
18:57
SPEAKER_03: It's all shambles to me.
18:58
SPEAKER_03: I look at that from the outside and I look at what people drive.
19:01
SPEAKER_03: People that are driving fast cars and then don't use them fast, which to me is the biggest insult because I like fast cars and I like to, and I drive them accordingly, but I don't I don't drive one now because I don't want to turn it into a metal coffin.
19:12
SPEAKER_03: Um, which I would do.
19:13
SPEAKER_03: Right.
19:14
SPEAKER_03: Uh but but there's so much tied into the car and your relationship to the car.
19:19
SPEAKER_03: People are so concerned that it's like everyone in my demographic specifically wants to drive the Land Rover, the Range Rover, the whatever.
19:27
SPEAKER_03: And I look at that and I think if you're coming from this place where you have the money and that's what you want to do, by all means do that.
19:33
SPEAKER_03: But if you're coming from a place where you're having a hard time making ends meet and you're getting that payment and like all the things, like you said, giving somebody shit about$300 for a car for oil chains and stuff like that, who are you performing for?
19:46
SPEAKER_03: Because I guarantee you that how good it feels to drive a nice car like that does not outweigh the anxiety and the dread of, oh my God, am I going to be able to make all of these payments for all of these things that I have to keep up with the Joneses?
20:00
SPEAKER_03: Who are these Joneses?
20:03
SPEAKER_00: You know, I it also comes to, like, again, I love using examples, and that's the only way to break it down to the ridiculous.
20:09
SPEAKER_00: I use a lot of medical terminology with my clients.
20:11
SPEAKER_00: When they don't understand, I say, Well, you're coming in for blood work.
20:14
SPEAKER_00: Let's do the blood work, then we'll jump to the MRI.
20:17
SPEAKER_00: And you're like, oh, I get that, I get that.
20:18
SPEAKER_00: So instead of using mumbo jumbo jargon.
20:20
SPEAKER_00: So when it comes to this vanity portion of it, I have a client that called and said, My son bought me what I've always wanted.
20:28
SPEAKER_00: Really?
20:29
SPEAKER_00: What's that?
20:30
SPEAKER_00: Well, you know my jag.
20:32
SPEAKER_00: I love my jag.
20:32
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I do.
20:33
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
20:34
SPEAKER_00: He bought me red caliper covers.
20:36
SPEAKER_00: I love red caliper covers.
20:38
SPEAKER_00: Meanwhile, like for perspective, he's 65, 66 years old.
20:41
SPEAKER_00: Now, granted, you say, Well, he's had a uh, you know, a good life and it's a silly thing, and kudos to me.
20:48
SPEAKER_00: I deserve it.
20:48
SPEAKER_00: That's fine.
20:49
SPEAKER_00: But coming from a place of red says that you want to be seen, right?
20:56
SPEAKER_00: So I say, okay, so what are you asking me?
20:59
SPEAKER_00: Well, I want to know if can you install the covers?
21:01
SPEAKER_00: So to understand brakes have calipers and they're a taco.
21:06
SPEAKER_00: They squeeze to stop the car, they let go.
21:09
SPEAKER_00: That cover that squeezes it, he wants it to be red.
21:12
SPEAKER_00: So when you're at the stoplight and you look over to his car, you see he's got red.
21:17
SPEAKER_00: So I said, okay, and I could do that for you, but a silly question.
21:22
SPEAKER_00: When you're in your jag, have you do you think that someone's actually going to step out of the car next to you at the stoplight, knock on your door, and say, May I meet you?
21:35
SPEAKER_00: Tell me your name.
21:37
SPEAKER_00: Who are you?
21:38
SPEAKER_00: You're so cool.
21:39
SPEAKER_00: Nobody cares.
21:41
SPEAKER_00: Nobody cares but you.
21:42
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
21:43
SPEAKER_00: Nobody cares at all.
21:45
SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, I could do it, but why?
21:48
SPEAKER_00: And I also have clients that come in and say, I dinged the corner of my car.
21:54
SPEAKER_00: It was my fault.
21:55
SPEAKER_00: What would it cost to fix it?
21:58
SPEAKER_00: True story, I'm not kidding.
22:00
SPEAKER_00: I walk out and I go, Well, walk with me.
22:03
SPEAKER_00: And they're like, what?
22:04
SPEAKER_00: Come here.
22:05
SPEAKER_00: To their own car.
22:07
SPEAKER_00: The rear bumper that smashed and destroyed like Afghanistan.
22:11
SPEAKER_00: When did this happen?
22:12
SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's been there for three years.
22:14
SPEAKER_00: So you don't care about that.
22:16
SPEAKER_00: You want that.
22:19
SPEAKER_00: What?
22:20
SPEAKER_00: It's just, again, you can't help but stop and say, I feel for society because what's going to end up happening is the repeat cycle.
22:30
SPEAKER_00: The kids, wear your seatbelt, don't text and drive.
22:33
SPEAKER_00: I took you to uh driving school.
22:35
SPEAKER_00: You know better.
22:37
SPEAKER_00: But what about the real habits of car ownership?
22:41
SPEAKER_00: Like the responsibility of maintaining it.
22:44
SPEAKER_00: I have clients that come in and say, and they trust me, and it's not about trust, it's just about them speaking out loud like a therapist, like, Shah, this piece of crap, this just been nothing but problems.
22:54
SPEAKER_00: It's just costing too much money.
22:56
SPEAKER_00: And this is where I created years ago what I call the TCO, the true cost of ownership.
23:01
SPEAKER_00: And I say, Gabe, I got you.
23:03
SPEAKER_00: You've been coming to me for, and I've been blessed that I have loyal clients in 31 years.
23:08
SPEAKER_00: So I pick one and I go, look, let's just take the last 10 years.
23:11
SPEAKER_00: You've been coming here.
23:12
SPEAKER_00: Got it.
23:12
SPEAKER_00: Nowhere else.
23:13
SPEAKER_00: You go in any way.
23:14
SPEAKER_00: No, no, no.
23:15
SPEAKER_00: You're the only one.
23:15
SPEAKER_00: Okay, got it.
23:16
SPEAKER_00: Let's just take the last three years.
23:17
SPEAKER_00: I have all your receipts.
23:18
SPEAKER_00: Let's add it all up.
23:19
SPEAKER_00: Give me a minute.
23:20
SPEAKER_00: I add it all up.
23:21
SPEAKER_00: All right.
23:21
SPEAKER_00: Three years, 36 months.
23:23
SPEAKER_00: You've spent in three years here with me at my Masbo Auto Repair Shop,$2,080,$800 and some odd dollars in three years.
23:31
SPEAKER_00: Divide that by 36.
23:32
SPEAKER_00: Flip the calculator over.
23:34
SPEAKER_00: You're averaging$73 a month.
23:36
SPEAKER_00: Where is this a piece of shit?
23:38
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
23:38
SPEAKER_00: How is this car a garbage car?
23:40
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
23:40
SPEAKER_03: That's nothing.
23:41
SPEAKER_00: Tell me the truth that you want.
23:43
SPEAKER_00: Tell me the truth that you're tired of the dog color.
23:46
SPEAKER_00: Tell me the truth that you want to compete with your neighbor, your mom, your sister, your brother-in-law, whoever.
23:53
SPEAKER_00: Tell me that and I'll respect you more.
23:55
SPEAKER_00: But don't tell me this car has been nothing but a problem.
23:58
SPEAKER_00: Because it hasn't.
23:59
SPEAKER_00: Because if you go to buy a new car right now, I don't care if you have 850 FICA score or not, you need to put down minimum$5,000 to$10,000 down on a$40,000 to$50,000 car.
24:09
SPEAKER_00: You're not getting anything less than$550 a month.
24:11
SPEAKER_00: You're not.
24:12
SPEAKER_00: Where is$73 in this car that there's nothing wrong?
24:16
SPEAKER_00: Straight, non-smoker, you've maintained it.
24:18
SPEAKER_00: You have all the receipts, you've not neglected anything.
24:21
SPEAKER_00: Tell me the truth.
24:22
SPEAKER_00: What do you want?
24:24
SPEAKER_00: And now they're like, all of a sudden, some get mad, they get pissed off, and I don't care.
24:29
SPEAKER_00: Right.
24:29
SPEAKER_00: But my job is to tell you the straight truth.
24:32
SPEAKER_00: If you're having a heart attack and you go to your doctor and he says, So you're going to run a marathon, you're going to die if you don't stop.
24:38
SPEAKER_00: No, I don't care.
24:39
SPEAKER_00: I'm going to, I'm going to run the marathon.
24:41
SPEAKER_00: Then it's on you.
24:42
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
24:42
SPEAKER_03: I love it.
24:43
SPEAKER_03: Talk to me about your book a little bit because I I uh I'm interested to know.
24:48
SPEAKER_03: You have this, you have a show, you have all sorts of stuff that's surrounded this, and it's fascinating to me because you've got to see all of the different layers of humanity.
24:57
SPEAKER_03: I mean, just all of the emotions, all of the emotional intelligence or lack thereof, right?
25:03
SPEAKER_03: I will maintain that the majority of the people that are surrounding us have an elementary EQ, which I understand, and I was the same, and I now that I understand a little bit, I work on it every single day because I understand the uh the value associated with that.
25:16
SPEAKER_03: But I definitely have had my times and my moments with, oh, this car is important or this will make me happy or this will whatever.
25:22
SPEAKER_03: But I found myself in a place where I had all of those things.
25:25
SPEAKER_03: I had the big fancy house and the big fancy car, and I've never been more miserable in my entire life, you know.
25:29
SPEAKER_03: Uh, so you always wake up to that a little bit.
25:31
SPEAKER_03: But I'm afraid a lot of people don't wake up to that and they just keep thinking the next thing, the next shiny thing is going to keep them happy.
25:39
SPEAKER_03: But say more about your book about it.
25:41
SPEAKER_03: What a percent.
25:42
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, the book basically started with exact again, with small examples of people saying, you know, like women will come in.
25:49
SPEAKER_00: Women are more agreeable than men.
25:52
SPEAKER_00: That's why when you see a sign at a quick lube, it says Ladies' Day.
25:57
SPEAKER_00: What do you think that is?
25:58
SPEAKER_00: That's fishing in a barrel.
26:00
SPEAKER_00: So screw the men, screw everyone else.
26:02
SPEAKER_00: You ladies, sign for you Thursday.
26:04
SPEAKER_00: Come on in.
26:05
SPEAKER_00: We're gonna do an old change.
26:06
SPEAKER_00: You're getting a discount because you're a lady.
26:08
SPEAKER_00: Well, I'm inviting you so I can fish in a barrel to basically poke and feed on your weakness of fear.
26:16
SPEAKER_00: You if you don't fix this, you're gonna crash and die.
26:19
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
26:19
SPEAKER_00: I see you have a baby seat.
26:20
SPEAKER_00: Ooh, if you don't fix it, you and your baby will be in trouble.
26:23
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
26:24
SPEAKER_00: So that those little examples, and men will come in and throw the credit card and go, keep it under a thousand.
26:29
SPEAKER_00: John, I haven't even looked at your car yet.
26:32
SPEAKER_01: Why are you giving me permission to spend a thousand dollars?
26:36
SPEAKER_00: What if it needs nothing?
26:37
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
26:38
SPEAKER_00: So, and then they cry, woe is me, when I got ripped off.
26:41
SPEAKER_00: So, what I ended up doing was with these small examples, I thought, you know, I gotta be able to reach a wider audience.
26:48
SPEAKER_00: So I wrote a TED talk, submitted it, got great feedback.
26:53
SPEAKER_00: One problem, too long.
26:56
SPEAKER_00: Okay, well, I'm sorry, but this convoluted world of car repairs, ownership, buying, selling, all this is I can't do it in what they said like 18 minutes or 21 minutes.
27:08
SPEAKER_00: I said, No, I I can't, I can't do that.
27:10
SPEAKER_00: Well, pick one topic.
27:11
SPEAKER_00: I said, No, it's still not enough.
27:12
SPEAKER_00: I I I need the message to come full circle.
27:16
SPEAKER_00: So then I was talking to a friend and he said, Well, it's too bad.
27:20
SPEAKER_00: Well, and he as he was leaving, he nonchalantly goes, maybe a book.
27:23
SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, Oh, a book?
27:26
SPEAKER_00: Because yeah, you reach everybody across the world.
27:30
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, Yeah, that's you know what, that's not a bad idea.
27:33
SPEAKER_00: So I put that somewhere in a little note, and I started, this is late night 2019, started putting notes to myself and started making examples and typing things and this and that, and lo and behold, COVID arrived.
27:47
SPEAKER_01: Ah.
27:47
SPEAKER_00: Hello, COVID.
27:49
SPEAKER_00: I have time.
27:51
SPEAKER_00: What do I do with myself while I'm wearing a mask?
27:54
SPEAKER_00: Oh time.
27:56
SPEAKER_00: So I started putting things together, and then slowly but surely, between 21 and 23, put the book all together, and then uh gave it to a publisher, and we started editing it, and then uh Black Friday of 2024 is when the book came out.
28:14
SPEAKER_03: Love it.
28:15
SPEAKER_00: And then it's just been a whirlwind since then.
28:17
SPEAKER_00: It was great.
28:18
SPEAKER_00: It got, you know, it got well received.
28:20
SPEAKER_00: I've done many, many uh book signing events with Barnes and Noble and so on.
28:24
SPEAKER_00: Uh but then what ended up happening was a lot of the parents that came and said, I gifted it to my son.
28:30
SPEAKER_00: I said, This book needs to be read before you allow him to drive or her to drive.
28:35
SPEAKER_00: They need to know the responsibility of car ownership before anything.
28:38
SPEAKER_00: So because it's a box with four wheels designed to take you from A to B.
28:42
SPEAKER_00: Nothing more.
28:42
SPEAKER_00: It's not an extension of your personality, it's not a piece of jewelry.
28:46
SPEAKER_00: And like I said earlier, nobody cares but you.
28:49
SPEAKER_00: So then came, well, I'm I'm forcing her to read it.
28:53
SPEAKER_00: She read a little bit, but then she gets bored and she puts it down.
28:55
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, well, it's comical.
28:57
SPEAKER_00: I made sure that I had my comedy in it a little bit.
29:00
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you know these kids, they're all about TikTok.
29:02
SPEAKER_00: And that again resonated.
29:04
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, TikTok, 30-second videos.
29:07
SPEAKER_00: You know what?
29:07
SPEAKER_00: I'll take the bullet points, add pictures like Denny's.
29:11
SPEAKER_00: I'll take moons over my hammy.
29:12
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
29:13
SPEAKER_00: That's easier than reading what's on the actual menu.
29:15
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
29:15
SPEAKER_00: I'll just take that picture.
29:16
SPEAKER_00: I added vintage cars and I took bullet points and I put it into the second coffee table book.
29:22
SPEAKER_00: And now that made it a little bit easier for the go, go, go crowd.
29:26
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
29:26
SPEAKER_00: And so here I am.
29:27
SPEAKER_01: I love it.
29:31
SPEAKER_02: Let's be real.
29:32
SPEAKER_02: Life doesn't come with a manual, but it does come with chaos.
29:36
SPEAKER_02: I wrote this book because I got tired of drowning and everyone else's noise and needed a way to fix my own shit.
29:43
SPEAKER_02: This isn't some sugar-coated self-help nonsense.
29:46
SPEAKER_02: It's a good idea.
29:47
SPEAKER_02: It's honest and it's active with tools that actually work in the middle of your life.
29:52
SPEAKER_02: If you're ready to stop playing small, take back your energy, and give unapologetically you again.
29:59
SPEAKER_02: This book is your playbook.
30:00
SPEAKER_02: You can pick up your copy of the Lifehack Playbook on Amazon or on our podcast website, let's get nakedpodcast.com.
30:12
SPEAKER_03: You know, you were saying something.
30:14
SPEAKER_03: I'm gonna jump around a little bit, but you were saying something at the beginning, I think before we started recording about your sons teaching them some you have to do uh a month at this, a month at that, or whatever.
30:26
SPEAKER_03: I would love to remind I would love to have the listeners be able to hear that because as we talk about the kid version, right?
30:31
SPEAKER_03: And you talk about the TikTok and people's whatever, I watch from the outside as my friends and me, guilty as well, gift cars to children that are well beyond what they should be driving at 16.
30:43
SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah.
30:44
SPEAKER_03: One of the things that I learned very, very early with my oldest is before she turned 16, my husband and I were so excited because for me, the measure of success back then was could I afford to buy things?
30:55
SPEAKER_03: Because I grew up with the opposite of money.
30:57
SPEAKER_03: And so that was this the measure of success for me could I buy them cars?
31:00
SPEAKER_03: Could I put them through college?
31:01
SPEAKER_03: Could I say yes to everything that they wanted?
31:03
SPEAKER_03: I overcorrected.
31:04
SPEAKER_03: The pendulum swung way too far the other direction.
31:07
SPEAKER_03: So I buy, you know, we go out and we buy this beautiful, brand new Jeep Rubicon, you know,$60,000 car for our 15-year-old right before she was gonna be 16, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
31:17
SPEAKER_03: And then she pissed me off.
31:18
SPEAKER_03: So before I even gave it to her, I sold it.
31:20
SPEAKER_03: And I went out and I bought exactly, exactly.
31:23
SPEAKER_03: I I never felt stronger in my life.
31:25
SPEAKER_03: Good for you.
31:25
SPEAKER_03: Went out and bought a shitty Jeep that was a stick, because I we all all learned when we were younger on a manual as well.
31:31
SPEAKER_03: And if you don't learn when you're young, you know, God forbid when are you gonna ever learn?
31:35
SPEAKER_03: And that was what we stuck to for all three of the kids was just kind of a beater that was gonna sometimes break down.
31:40
SPEAKER_03: That's how it is, right?
31:41
SPEAKER_03: But that's how you learn.
31:42
SPEAKER_03: That's how you learn the confidence.
31:44
SPEAKER_03: And yes, they all graduated to something that was different after they had driven those for a couple of years.
31:48
SPEAKER_03: But those are all really beautiful experiences that we had when we were younger that I think were robbing our children of.
31:54
SPEAKER_03: So will you please tell about just your your own.
31:57
SPEAKER_00: I'll start with this again.
31:58
SPEAKER_00: Uh I'll share this story with again.
32:00
SPEAKER_00: My dad, I'm very fortunate.
32:01
SPEAKER_00: I had a an amazing father who was more about empowering and educating about life more than discipline of go to bed at this time and make your bed.
32:08
SPEAKER_00: And he had all that too, but he was really more of a worldly he, I at one time, the the number one lesson that I learned, which is the core of everything I do at my shop, of dotting the I's and crossing the T's.
32:20
SPEAKER_00: Dad, I want a car.
32:22
SPEAKER_00: Sure, you're getting good grades.
32:24
SPEAKER_00: Why not?
32:24
SPEAKER_00: I'll get you a car.
32:26
SPEAKER_00: And he said, uh, so uh give me some time, I'll get back to you.
32:31
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
32:31
SPEAKER_00: Some time went by, and it was right before my uh 15th birthday.
32:36
SPEAKER_00: He bought me a car.
32:37
SPEAKER_00: What did he buy me?
32:38
SPEAKER_00: A yellow pinto.
32:40
SPEAKER_01: Yes.
32:41
SPEAKER_00: With rust.
32:44
SPEAKER_00: And and back then I didn't know.
32:46
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
32:46
SPEAKER_00: But I learned after my uncle told me, of working with him, he goes, Oh, yeah, great.
32:50
SPEAKER_00: Your dad's real smart.
32:51
SPEAKER_00: He bought you a car that blows up when he gets hit in the back.
32:53
SPEAKER_00: Because I guess at that time, if you got hit in the back of that pinto, it would blow up because the cast gas tank was right there.
32:59
SPEAKER_00: So I get the car, I'm excited.
33:02
SPEAKER_00: So, and this is way back in the den.
33:04
SPEAKER_00: So I go out and buy a Playboy air freshener.
33:08
SPEAKER_00: And I get one of those cup holder things, and I get armor all and shine it.
33:12
SPEAKER_00: It's into my backyard, and this is Philadelphia.
33:14
SPEAKER_00: Long driveway, it's like 75 feet long in the back of the house, and the gate that opens and closes, and I'm in there and I'm doing my thing.
33:22
SPEAKER_00: It's the weekend and I'm excited.
33:24
SPEAKER_00: I tell everyone, now comes Monday morning.
33:27
SPEAKER_00: Got my lunch bag, got everything ready to go.
33:30
SPEAKER_00: I go to the car, I start it, warm it up.
33:34
SPEAKER_00: And my dad opens the back door from the back of the house and says, Hey, what you doing?
33:38
SPEAKER_00: He says, Getting ready to go to school.
33:40
SPEAKER_00: Daddy goes, Come on in for a second.
33:41
SPEAKER_00: Sure.
33:42
SPEAKER_00: Go back in.
33:43
SPEAKER_00: The car's running.
33:44
SPEAKER_00: He says, uh, so what are you doing with the car?
33:48
SPEAKER_00: Gonna go to school.
33:48
SPEAKER_00: I said, Oh, I said, See, we're gonna have an issue.
33:51
SPEAKER_00: What's that?
33:52
SPEAKER_00: He goes, You said what to me.
33:55
SPEAKER_00: I want a car.
33:56
SPEAKER_00: Yeah?
33:57
SPEAKER_00: I gave you a car.
33:59
SPEAKER_00: Nowhere in this equation did you say you were gonna drive it.
34:04
SPEAKER_00: But that's what cars are for, Daddy.
34:07
SPEAKER_00: No.
34:08
SPEAKER_00: You want a jacket.
34:10
SPEAKER_00: I bought you a jacket.
34:13
SPEAKER_00: You didn't tell me you weren't gonna wear it or wear it.
34:15
SPEAKER_00: I got you the jacket.
34:17
SPEAKER_00: But nowhere did you say you were going to drive the car.
34:20
SPEAKER_00: You said you wanted one.
34:22
SPEAKER_00: There it is.
34:25
SPEAKER_00: So what do I do?
34:26
SPEAKER_00: Whatever you want to do, but you can't drive it.
34:28
SPEAKER_00: You can stay here in the on the on the property.
34:32
SPEAKER_00: So for three months, I backed it up to the fence and backed it forward.
34:38
SPEAKER_00: Back and forth.
34:39
SPEAKER_00: Finally I said, Dad, I don't want the car anymore.
34:42
SPEAKER_00: It's your car.
34:42
SPEAKER_00: What do you want to do?
34:43
SPEAKER_00: I said, Well, I want to sell it.
34:45
SPEAKER_00: He sold it.
34:46
SPEAKER_00: Counted 100.
34:47
SPEAKER_00: She goes, Here, do what you want with it.
34:49
SPEAKER_00: It's your money.
34:50
SPEAKER_00: From that moment on, I realized that I better mean what I say and think about anything I'm gonna say.
34:59
SPEAKER_00: Dot the I's and cross the T's, right?
35:01
SPEAKER_00: And so coming forward to what I do here, uh I have lots of clients that come in and say, My daughter uh got this vehicle and uh just make sure it's safe.
35:13
SPEAKER_00: And I I can't help but say, but you gave her your Mercedes.
35:17
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
35:18
SPEAKER_00: She's 16 years old.
35:20
SPEAKER_00: Like, what you're gonna have an oops-oh oh moment.
35:22
SPEAKER_00: Why would you do that?
35:24
SPEAKER_00: Like, give them something simple, something very basic.
35:29
SPEAKER_00: Well, no, and and what happens is when the and I think they're to the point you were saying, we're doing them such a disservice that when we tell them, here's the car, wear your seatbelt, don't text and drive, we feel safe as parents, but it's got sensors, it'll tell them.
35:43
SPEAKER_00: It's got backup camera.
35:44
SPEAKER_00: What happens when the backup camera glitches for 30 seconds and they hit something?
35:48
SPEAKER_00: They still need to turn around and look.
35:51
SPEAKER_00: They still need to adjust the side view mirror like they're supposed to.
35:55
SPEAKER_00: But those bells and whistles and loud decorations are just a facade.
36:00
SPEAKER_00: It means nothing.
36:02
SPEAKER_00: It means nothing at all.
36:03
SPEAKER_00: So this is why I'm I'm a true advocate to say, humble them.
36:08
SPEAKER_00: They need to stay humble before they think that because they repeat the cycle.
36:13
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
36:14
SPEAKER_00: And it's your fault as the parent, it's your fault.
36:16
SPEAKER_03: It's completely your fault.
36:18
SPEAKER_03: You know, you know, when we talk about like confidence in kiddos and the things, when they're when they're learning how to drive a manual transmission, when they're, you know, learning how to change oil, because at that house, that was at our house, that was important.
36:30
SPEAKER_03: It was like, you know, my husband's gonna go out and we're gonna teach you how to change the oil, we're gonna teach you how to change a flat tire, we're gonna teach you how to do all these things.
36:38
SPEAKER_03: You have to know how to do these things.
36:40
SPEAKER_03: You have to understand that that little sticker up on the left side of the window where it tells you when maintenance is due.
36:45
SPEAKER_03: Exactly.
36:46
SPEAKER_03: You have to pay attention to that because your vehicle is only as good as you maintain it.
36:49
SPEAKER_03: Right.
36:50
SPEAKER_03: You know, but then we also we rob our children of the ability to build confidence by giving them something that's new and not telling them anything and then saying that we're gonna take care of it for them, and then they don't even know how to do any of that.
37:01
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
37:01
SPEAKER_03: You know, I I remember one time it was pretty funny about 10 years ago.
37:04
SPEAKER_03: I was going to get my hair done and I um got a flat tire on the way there.
37:08
SPEAKER_03: I hit something and I could literally hear the air going out of it.
37:11
SPEAKER_03: And I was, you know, just right on time for my appointment.
37:13
SPEAKER_03: So I went in and sat in the chair and started doing the thing, knowing I was gonna have an issue.
37:17
SPEAKER_03: So she puts my foils in, and I said, Okay, how long do I have?
37:21
SPEAKER_03: She goes, I don't know, 30, 35 minutes.
37:23
SPEAKER_03: And I said, Okay, I'm gonna go out and change my tire real quick.
37:25
SPEAKER_03: She's like, What are you talking about?
37:27
SPEAKER_03: And I'm like, Well, I got a flat on the way here, and like blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
37:30
SPEAKER_03: She goes, Well, call triple A.
37:31
SPEAKER_03: I'm like, my dad will not allow that.
37:33
SPEAKER_03: And I'm a grown woman at that point.
37:35
SPEAKER_03: I'm 40 years old, you know, 40 years old.
37:37
SPEAKER_03: Don't care.
37:37
SPEAKER_03: There's no freaking way I'm calling triple triple A.
37:41
SPEAKER_03: So I'm out there with my foils in my hair, it's 105 degrees in the summer.
37:46
SPEAKER_03: You know, and the lady comes out, and she's taking my hairdresser comes out and she's taking a picture.
37:49
SPEAKER_03: I'm like, no, no, no, that's how we roll.
37:51
SPEAKER_03: That's how in in my house, that's how we grew up.
37:53
SPEAKER_03: If you don't know how to take care of a vehicle, you don't get one.
37:56
SPEAKER_03: You know, so our kiddos, they need those confidence builders of figuring out what to do when your car stalls or when it breaks down, or when you, you know, and you're not gonna get that with a brand new Mercedes.
38:06
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and I I agree 100%.
38:07
SPEAKER_00: And also what ends up happening is, and I've proven it, where I've for the last eight years, twice a year, I teach car care classes for free on a Saturday for specifically women and teenagers, and anyone else that wants to come.
38:24
SPEAKER_00: Sure.
38:24
SPEAKER_00: So in the last eight years, twice a year, spring and fall, when they show up, they all sign up.
38:32
SPEAKER_00: I sometimes I have 50 people sign up.
38:35
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
38:35
SPEAKER_00: Sometimes 30, sometimes 20.
38:37
SPEAKER_00: Sure.
38:37
SPEAKER_00: It depends.
38:38
SPEAKER_00: It's free.
38:39
SPEAKER_00: Snacks, coffee.
38:41
SPEAKER_00: The whole I have a female police officer that shows up and talks about safety on the highway, safety on the road for girls.
38:48
SPEAKER_00: When you get stuck and someone shows up and says, Hi, I'm a good Samaritan.
38:53
SPEAKER_00: I want to help you.
38:53
SPEAKER_00: You need to help.
38:54
SPEAKER_00: What's the etiquette?
38:55
SPEAKER_00: Do you get out of the car?
38:56
SPEAKER_00: Do you roll the window down?
38:57
SPEAKER_00: Do you stay inside?
38:57
SPEAKER_00: Do you tell them to go away?
38:59
SPEAKER_00: Do you call someone?
39:00
SPEAKER_00: All that the female police officer does that in their talk.
39:03
SPEAKER_00: And it's a three, four-hour, depending on QA class.
39:08
SPEAKER_00: There are stations.
39:09
SPEAKER_00: One station teaches them how to change the wiper blade.
39:13
SPEAKER_00: Another station how to jumpstart a car, another station how to change the air filter, another station how to read the owner's manual, another station how to change a spare tire.
39:22
SPEAKER_00: And then parts, old oil touching, smelling, seeing what oil is really all coolant.
39:28
SPEAKER_00: What this is what coolant smells like, smells like pancake syrup, oil smells like burning carpet, da da da da, breaks, struts, all that.
39:35
SPEAKER_00: And the point I'm getting at is here's the parents that are with these teenagers.
39:39
SPEAKER_00: They're there.
39:40
SPEAKER_00: They want to witness, they want to feel good.
39:42
SPEAKER_00: But again, it's BS because as I'm watching them and I'm talking, they're on their phone or they're looking someplace else, or when it's time to actually get in and say, come on, let's go.
39:53
SPEAKER_00: It's your turn.
39:54
SPEAKER_00: Change the spare time.
39:55
SPEAKER_00: I don't want.
39:56
SPEAKER_00: I know it's heavy, I'll help you.
39:58
SPEAKER_00: And mom just is it's okay.
40:00
SPEAKER_00: She doesn't want to.
40:00
SPEAKER_00: Like, where why are you here?
40:02
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
40:03
SPEAKER_00: You just go through the motions to make you feel good, to tell your friends, I took my daughter to car care class so she can learn, but she didn't learn anything.
40:10
SPEAKER_03: Right.
40:10
SPEAKER_03: She sat on her phone the whole time.
40:11
SPEAKER_00: She didn't pay attention to anything.
40:13
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
40:13
SPEAKER_00: Because in one ear and out the other, and it's gone.
40:15
SPEAKER_00: So why are you here?
40:16
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
40:17
SPEAKER_00: That in itself proves to me that you could talk all you want.
40:20
SPEAKER_00: It's like talking to the wall.
40:22
SPEAKER_00: Eventually, something's gonna happen.
40:24
SPEAKER_00: And when that happens, they're there crying, woe is me.
40:28
SPEAKER_00: I got ripped off.
40:30
SPEAKER_00: I got bad luck.
40:31
SPEAKER_00: I have a bad car that cost me money.
40:33
SPEAKER_00: I can't believe, and I can't believe.
40:35
SPEAKER_00: And I think that people forget that the moment you drive off the lot, that car depreciates 13%.
40:42
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
40:42
SPEAKER_03: It's a big deal.
40:43
SPEAKER_03: 13%.
40:43
SPEAKER_03: It's a big deal.
40:44
SPEAKER_03: Immediately.
40:45
SPEAKER_00: It is not an investment, right?
40:47
SPEAKER_00: And so when you are in that position and you go, Well, I'm gonna sell it.
40:52
SPEAKER_00: What you end up doing is putting yourself on the heels of what you uh shared earlier about financial uh stability, is that you're repeating the cycle by saying, All right, I don't want this car anymore.
41:03
SPEAKER_00: Got it.
41:03
SPEAKER_00: Sorry, it's depreciated, it's worth$8,000.
41:07
SPEAKER_00: You owe$12.
41:08
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
41:08
SPEAKER_00: Okay, well, we're just gonna take, don't worry about it.
41:10
SPEAKER_00: We're just gonna pay you their eight off, take the difference and flip it onto your new car, and now give you uh, you know, a new loan.
41:17
SPEAKER_00: And when you say I can't afford the loan, you don't know enough or educate yourself enough to understand that wait a minute, I can't be at 600.
41:24
SPEAKER_00: No problem, I got you.
41:26
SPEAKER_00: Got you down the four, four, oh, thank God.
41:29
SPEAKER_00: But they gave you an 84-month loan.
41:31
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, with freaking 20% interest or something like that.
41:33
SPEAKER_03: Are you ever gonna get out of this?
41:35
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
41:36
SPEAKER_00: Not to mention the wild card, if in Arizona is number one, the top three most highest accident rated state.
41:44
SPEAKER_00: So if you get hit, it's not your fault or your fault, and the car is totaled and you're upside down, you just open up a new chapter in your life.
41:51
SPEAKER_00: It's called chapter 13.
41:53
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you're going bankrupt.
41:54
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
41:55
SPEAKER_03: It's crazy that people don't aren't educated consumers when it comes to that, because you're absolutely right.
41:59
SPEAKER_03: I watch as people roll it over, roll it over, roll it over.
42:02
SPEAKER_03: It's like, who do you think is gonna pay for that?
42:05
SPEAKER_00: It's the simplest thing, too.
42:07
SPEAKER_00: And again, I mentioned earlier the box with, and I'm kind of flipping everywhere, but it's important to know that this box with four wheels that weighs an average car weighs between 31 and 6,500 pounds.
42:18
SPEAKER_00: So here's this for perspective.
42:20
SPEAKER_00: For every 1,000 pound of your car, and for every 10 miles an hour, if you hit something, it's considered like hitting a baby rhinosaurus.
42:30
SPEAKER_00: Multiply that to the actual weight of your car, add another 20 miles an hour.
42:36
SPEAKER_00: This is the death trap.
42:37
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
42:38
SPEAKER_00: This is not a fun thing while you're listening to your Spotify.
42:41
SPEAKER_00: Right.
42:42
SPEAKER_00: It's not.
42:42
SPEAKER_00: Right.
42:43
SPEAKER_00: It's a piece of equipment that's dangerous in your life and other people's lives are in your hands.
42:48
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
42:48
SPEAKER_00: So treat it like that.
42:50
SPEAKER_03: It's a it's a weapon.
42:51
SPEAKER_03: And if you don't realize that, like it's a it's serious.
42:55
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
42:55
SPEAKER_03: Oh yeah.
42:56
SPEAKER_03: Now it's it's wild to me because I think I look at I look at um the evolution of cars in our house, specifically with the kiddos, and it just makes me smile because, you know, just like everybody else, we're learning as we go.
43:08
SPEAKER_03: You know, but there have been things that we've done that I'm proud of, and things that we've done that I'm not proud of.
43:13
SPEAKER_03: But what I will tell you right now is every one of my children knows how to change a tire and would do it themselves on the side of the freeway without hesitation.
43:20
SPEAKER_03: You know, and I have two girls and one boy.
43:22
SPEAKER_03: I have, you know, my middle daughter's a mechanic.
43:25
SPEAKER_00: That's awesome.
43:25
SPEAKER_03: I know, I know.
43:26
SPEAKER_03: I'm gonna connect her with you because she's pleased.
43:29
SPEAKER_00: She can come down and she can I can mentor her all day long, not a problem.
43:32
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
43:32
SPEAKER_03: She's she's lovely, you know, and she and she loves that.
43:34
SPEAKER_03: She loves it with her hands, and she's like, I learned how to change brakes.
43:37
SPEAKER_03: And you know, there's something to learning a trade.
43:40
SPEAKER_03: You know, one of the things that you said is each one of your kids needed to do a month at in the service industry.
43:45
SPEAKER_00: So, yeah, that's right.
43:47
SPEAKER_00: So, again, with I went off on a tangent earlier.
43:49
SPEAKER_00: So that's a good point with my dad's advice, he said that the best thing that you could do is to give them an example experience of three things.
43:58
SPEAKER_00: So I've done that with both of my boys.
44:00
SPEAKER_00: So I said, go wash dishes at a high-end, fast-paced, crazy F bomb restaurant, like Anthony Bourdain style, right?
44:08
SPEAKER_00: Wash dishes.
44:09
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
44:10
SPEAKER_00: Minimum three months.
44:11
SPEAKER_00: Three months.
44:12
SPEAKER_00: Just work, do it for the heck of it.
44:14
SPEAKER_00: You know you're not going to be a dishwasher, but do it.
44:16
SPEAKER_00: See the real raw emotions of what happens in that scene.
44:21
SPEAKER_00: Then go and sell cars on a parking lot and try and lie to people.
44:27
SPEAKER_00: Hey, how you doing?
44:28
SPEAKER_00: Nice jacket.
44:28
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
44:29
SPEAKER_00: What'd you do?
44:29
SPEAKER_00: Shoot the couch?
44:30
SPEAKER_00: Come on over here.
44:31
SPEAKER_00: Let me see what, you know, that's a lot.
44:33
SPEAKER_00: You got a nice smell.
44:34
SPEAKER_00: What is that?
44:34
SPEAKER_00: Paca Raban?
44:36
SPEAKER_00: My uncle used to have that.
44:37
SPEAKER_00: Hey, come on in.
44:38
SPEAKER_00: Let me get you a cappuccino.
44:39
SPEAKER_00: Let me talk to my manager and see what we could do.
44:41
SPEAKER_00: I'm throwing affiliates in.
44:43
SPEAKER_00: Let me talk to my manager and see what I can do you out of.
44:47
SPEAKER_00: And and see how you, if you had an ounce of faith, if you had an ounce of integrity or empathy that your parents taught you and you believe that you're this, you're your parents' child, that will all be destroyed when your manager's screaming and yelling at you while spitting in your face, telling you, you need to sell 30 cars this month.
45:06
SPEAKER_00: Let's go, let's go.
45:08
SPEAKER_00: And the lies you have to tell to make that happen to Mr.
45:11
SPEAKER_00: and Mrs.
45:12
SPEAKER_00: Johnson, to Mr.
45:13
SPEAKER_00: and Mrs.
45:13
SPEAKER_00: Livingston, who are just there to buy a car.
45:16
SPEAKER_00: The lies you have to tell.
45:18
SPEAKER_00: Do that for a month.
45:20
SPEAKER_00: Then go on stage on an open mic night, get up and try and tell jokes for three minutes.
45:26
SPEAKER_00: Three minutes is, you know, a heavyweight bout round is three minutes.
45:31
SPEAKER_00: That's verbally, you will be destroyed when no one laughs at you.
45:34
SPEAKER_00: When they scream, get off the stage, boo, you suck.
45:38
SPEAKER_00: And you're just trying.
45:40
SPEAKER_00: And when you do get off the stage and your tail is tucked, get off and come back next week and do it again.
45:46
SPEAKER_00: Do that consistently.
45:47
SPEAKER_00: Do those three things.
45:48
SPEAKER_00: And I promise you, no Harvard graduate will have an ounce of that experience from what you have by doing those three things.
45:55
SPEAKER_00: They will not.
45:55
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
45:56
SPEAKER_00: Because reading books is one thing, living life is another.
46:00
SPEAKER_00: When you can sit at a bus stop and talk to a homeless person who tells you their life story and you're humbled, that is what life is.
46:09
SPEAKER_03: Oh, that is life.
46:10
SPEAKER_00: Not you sitting at Starbucks scrolling through TikTok while you're staring out at your little Mercedes that your mom and dad gave you.
46:17
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
46:17
SPEAKER_00: That is not life.
46:18
SPEAKER_03: Do you know where life happens when you put your damn phone down?
46:20
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
46:21
SPEAKER_03: When you put your damn phone down, you look somebody in the eye and you have a human connection and you have a conversation with someone.
46:26
SPEAKER_03: You know, it's like I go into different places and I look around, and literally everyone is this.
46:32
SPEAKER_03: And I think it breaks my heart for the entire situation because it's not like the data points are in, just so everyone understands.
46:40
SPEAKER_03: It's a terrible thing.
46:41
SPEAKER_00: It's a terrible listen, and you know this, and I'm sure you're being a parent and and and and being married and all this, it I the the actual proof is in the pudding.
46:49
SPEAKER_00: I'll give you this example as well.
46:52
SPEAKER_00: It's just like cars.
46:54
SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna go out and shop for a beautiful bedroom set.
46:59
SPEAKER_00: Follow me.
47:00
SPEAKER_00: Got it.
47:00
SPEAKER_00: Okay, honey, let's go.
47:02
SPEAKER_00: I don't like this color.
47:03
SPEAKER_00: I don't like this guy's too many pillows.
47:05
SPEAKER_00: We go through this whole thing a month until we find the right color and the right thing.
47:09
SPEAKER_00: Got it.
47:10
SPEAKER_00: It's in our bed, everything's hunky-dory.
47:12
SPEAKER_00: Now, when I'm gone at 6 a.m.
47:15
SPEAKER_00: to go to work and I come home at 6 p.m.
47:18
SPEAKER_00: and I go to bed at 7:30, who the F is looking at that beautiful colored bedroom set?
47:24
SPEAKER_00: Nobody, it's in the dark.
47:26
SPEAKER_00: And when people come to visit me and they say, hey, Shahe, I'm here to have coffee, or you're invited me for barbecue, do I go, hey, come into my bedroom and take a look at my bedroom set real quick.
47:34
SPEAKER_00: Take a look at what who and what vanity umbrella is that for, right?
47:38
SPEAKER_00: That's number one.
47:40
SPEAKER_00: Number two is the same for cars.
47:43
SPEAKER_00: I want this color, I want that.
47:45
SPEAKER_00: Nobody cares but you.
47:47
SPEAKER_00: And the third point I'm making at where it's broken system.
47:50
SPEAKER_00: Show me a home right now, maybe in the Midwest, but show me in a home in a majority 50 states of this country, this beautiful country.
47:58
SPEAKER_00: Show me where the dining room set is actually used to sit on Sunday or it's Saturday evening to have dinner together as an entire family.
48:06
SPEAKER_00: It is not.
48:07
SPEAKER_00: It is used for bills, for the kids to do their laptop work on.
48:11
SPEAKER_00: That China set that has that dusty old China that you are gonna bring out for an occasion is no longer used.
48:16
SPEAKER_00: So why do you go out and buy a dining room set when you're not using it for the value it was designed for?
48:22
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
48:22
SPEAKER_00: Unity, family, love, trust, empathy, it's gone.
48:26
SPEAKER_00: It's broken.
48:27
SPEAKER_00: That whole thing is under the same umbrella of car ownership.
48:31
SPEAKER_00: It is an extension of everything that is broken.
48:34
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
48:35
SPEAKER_03: All of it.
48:36
SPEAKER_03: What do you what do you I agree with you?
48:38
SPEAKER_03: What do you what are your thoughts on what do you do to fix it?
48:41
SPEAKER_03: Like obviously it's an inside job and you gotta do something for your job.
48:45
SPEAKER_00: But it starts with the tree.
48:46
SPEAKER_00: The fruit falls next to the tree, right?
48:50
SPEAKER_00: It starts with the tree.
48:51
SPEAKER_00: So either cut the trees down and replant, or vitamin feed the trees and change the fruit format.
49:00
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
49:00
SPEAKER_00: That's the only way.
49:01
SPEAKER_00: So when a parent cries, woe is me, I'm so sorry, it is your fault.
49:05
SPEAKER_00: A child never listened.
49:07
SPEAKER_00: I have a 30-year-old and a 27-year-old, right?
49:10
SPEAKER_00: They will listen and go, Yeah, dad, and appease me, and I'm I'm blessed.
49:13
SPEAKER_00: I have two great boys.
49:15
SPEAKER_00: But there are moments where I realize that they've actually done by seeing what I've done versus the advice I've given them.
49:22
SPEAKER_03: Yes, 100%.
49:23
SPEAKER_03: Kid, kids, and there's this saying, and people go seven minutes.
49:27
SPEAKER_03: Sure, sure, sure.
49:28
SPEAKER_03: They're watching you, right?
49:30
SPEAKER_03: So it's like, you know, every move.
49:32
SPEAKER_03: So Casey, my gal Casey, um, she's actually in having a surgery today, taking care of herself, something that was important to do for her kidneys and stuff.
49:40
SPEAKER_03: And she has been traditionally the person that always puts the kids first.
49:44
SPEAKER_03: And she says, they're the most important thing, they're the most important thing, they're the most important thing.
49:47
SPEAKER_03: And I said, But you're not taking care of yourself.
49:49
SPEAKER_03: She goes, Well, I'm too busy taking care of them.
49:50
SPEAKER_03: I said, Yeah, but the problem is that's how you teach them, is by what they see.
49:54
SPEAKER_03: And if you're modeling behavior where you're the martyr who doesn't put yourself first and doesn't take care of yourself and does that, that's what you're handing down to them.
50:02
SPEAKER_03: Is that what you want to hand down to them?
50:03
SPEAKER_03: She goes, No.
50:04
SPEAKER_03: I then I said, then show me the evidence, right?
50:06
SPEAKER_03: I love that.
50:06
SPEAKER_03: I had a guest on recently, his name is George, and he says, Show me the evidence.
50:10
SPEAKER_03: If you say that that your marriage is important, show me on your calendar where date night is.
50:14
SPEAKER_03: Right?
50:15
SPEAKER_03: If you say that putting your kids through college or that your financial freedom is important to you, show me the evidence of where you're putting whatever.
50:21
SPEAKER_03: That one statement is everything to me.
50:23
SPEAKER_03: So she's showing her kids the evidence right now because she's having things that are happening where she's like, oh my God, and she'll come tell me about her son who, you know, he saw this and he's, you know, does this and he's starting to do this.
50:33
SPEAKER_03: I'm like, it's because you're showing them, not telling them that it's important.
50:38
SPEAKER_03: You're showing them that you're taking care of yourself, that your health is important, that these things are important.
50:42
SPEAKER_03: And it's like, once you realize that, that's the stuff that makes you excited.
50:46
SPEAKER_03: I'd rather own my car outright than have an outrageous payment where I'm you know pulling up to someone's house of like, oh, look what I drive.
50:53
SPEAKER_03: No one gives a shit.
50:54
SPEAKER_03: Like I said, no one needs a shit.
50:55
SPEAKER_03: Nobody cares.
50:55
SPEAKER_00: Simon Sinek had that same thing.
50:57
SPEAKER_00: I love listening to him.
50:58
SPEAKER_00: He had one quote where he said, uh, someone said, Hey, uh uh, when did you learn how to love your wife?
51:05
SPEAKER_00: Oh, prove it.
51:06
SPEAKER_00: Uh, on the day we got married, prove it.
51:08
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, prove it.
51:09
SPEAKER_00: Prove it.
51:09
SPEAKER_00: Prove it.
51:10
SPEAKER_00: What?
51:10
SPEAKER_00: Did you just say I love you?
51:11
SPEAKER_00: Or do you are you there when she comes home tired?
51:14
SPEAKER_00: Or do you uh make sure her car is warmed up before she leaves?
51:17
SPEAKER_00: Like, prove it, right?
51:19
SPEAKER_00: And so on the heels of that, uh, that uh everything is about I love, I love, I love my car.
51:25
SPEAKER_00: You can't love your car.
51:26
SPEAKER_03: No.
51:26
SPEAKER_00: Don't name your car.
51:27
SPEAKER_00: Please don't name your car.
51:29
SPEAKER_03: I love that so much.
51:30
SPEAKER_03: I've never named my car.
51:31
SPEAKER_03: And people are always like, What's your name?
51:32
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I'm because what happens is when they come in and go, Betsy deserves a spa day.
51:37
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
51:38
SPEAKER_00: Really?
51:38
SPEAKER_00: What what what kind of a spa day does Betsy deserve?
51:41
SPEAKER_03: Oh, shy.
51:42
SPEAKER_03: You're making me happy.
51:43
SPEAKER_00: $700 spa day for what?
51:45
SPEAKER_00: Right?
51:46
SPEAKER_00: And so I I love saying this.
51:48
SPEAKER_00: Let's look at the world in this, and I'll say this first.
51:52
SPEAKER_00: Every car owner needs to look at their uh at everything through two lenses.
51:57
SPEAKER_00: The vehicle in front of them and the mindset behind it.
52:01
SPEAKER_03: Say more.
52:03
SPEAKER_00: So imagine the entire world.
52:07
SPEAKER_00: Every car is white.
52:10
SPEAKER_00: White.
52:11
SPEAKER_00: Every car has no name on it.
52:14
SPEAKER_00: Every car is four doors, automatic, a radio, a seatbelt, and roll down manual windows.
52:22
SPEAKER_00: That's it.
52:23
SPEAKER_00: That's all.
52:24
SPEAKER_00: Every single car in the world is that.
52:26
SPEAKER_00: How do you think the world would be when it comes to driving and car ownership?
52:31
SPEAKER_00: How do you think when there's no badge for you to promote, for you to stand behind, to make you feel better or your self-worth, when there's no badge, it's just a white box with four wheels.
52:44
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
52:44
SPEAKER_00: But no name, no horsepower, no engine size, nothing.
52:48
SPEAKER_00: Just A to B.
52:50
SPEAKER_00: I promise you the world will be a different place.
52:52
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
52:53
SPEAKER_00: When it first started, it was for transportation.
52:56
SPEAKER_00: Then came, well, safety, these people don't know.
52:58
SPEAKER_00: Early, you know, pioneer days when Ford and Chevrolet and the Detroit days when America was thriving.
53:05
SPEAKER_00: Those were the days where they tried to improve.
53:07
SPEAKER_00: Oh, let's make this more safer.
53:09
SPEAKER_00: Then came the internet.
53:12
SPEAKER_00: Then came inconvenience.
53:16
SPEAKER_00: And when it's inconvenient, I'll go to the internet because I can find the answer in three seconds.
53:21
SPEAKER_00: Who needs a dictionary?
53:22
SPEAKER_00: Why read a dictionary to learn how to say the word, let alone what the definition is, when I can just ask Google or now ChatGPT or AI, why bother?
53:33
SPEAKER_00: Because it tells me everything I need to know.
53:35
SPEAKER_00: When you're at that level, what's left on the table?
53:40
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
53:40
SPEAKER_00: Nothing, right?
53:41
SPEAKER_00: There's nothing there.
53:42
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
53:42
SPEAKER_00: My youngest son, one time we were talking about a girl that he was seeing, and the subject came up because, Dad, you know, a lot of things you say about car ownership resonates with me in like life.
53:54
SPEAKER_00: And I love that because it's not just about cars, it's about the mindset.
53:57
SPEAKER_00: And you always say mindset, and this and I'm gonna get you a t-shirt that says mindset, you know, just dad and son talk.
54:02
SPEAKER_00: I said, Okay, I I have a great scenario for you.
54:05
SPEAKER_00: I I need to know your perspective.
54:07
SPEAKER_00: Since you're sharing that you listen to dad, I want to know where your thoughts are.
54:11
SPEAKER_00: You met a young girl, this is all hypothetical.
54:14
SPEAKER_00: She is the most beautiful woman on the planet.
54:16
SPEAKER_00: Everybody on the world wants to know her, meet her, and go out with her.
54:20
SPEAKER_00: But you have her, she's yours.
54:22
SPEAKER_00: For six months you're dating her, and every time you go out, you pick her up and you take her and you bring her back.
54:31
SPEAKER_00: One day, out of the blue, she says, I'll meet you there.
54:37
SPEAKER_00: And you say, Okay, but I'll be No, no, no, I'll meet you there.
54:40
SPEAKER_00: Gotcha.
54:41
SPEAKER_00: You show up at the destination, restaurant, bar, whatever.
54:43
SPEAKER_00: She shows up, you're outside being a gentleman, waiting for her to come, so you can walk her in.
54:48
SPEAKER_00: She pulls in and an orange, rusty shitbox.
54:53
SPEAKER_00: Wheels are falling off, seats are torn, just just destroyed.
54:58
SPEAKER_00: Windshield is cracked.
55:00
SPEAKER_00: There's no rear windshield.
55:03
SPEAKER_00: And she gets out with that beautiful smile, and you look at her.
55:08
SPEAKER_00: What do you think?
55:09
SPEAKER_00: What do you say?
55:11
SPEAKER_00: What do you judge?
55:13
SPEAKER_00: What do you want to do?
55:15
SPEAKER_00: Where does that most beautiful girl that everybody in the planet turn into when you start judging by that orange shitlock she pulled out?
55:25
SPEAKER_00: Would you dump her?
55:27
SPEAKER_00: Would you question her?
55:28
SPEAKER_00: Would you insult her?
55:30
SPEAKER_00: Would you tell her why?
55:31
SPEAKER_00: What what what's this all about?
55:33
SPEAKER_00: Or we just say, who cares?
55:36
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
55:37
SPEAKER_00: That's the society that we need to live in.
55:40
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
55:41
SPEAKER_03: No, you're not wrong.
55:43
SPEAKER_03: You're not wrong.
55:44
SPEAKER_03: You have such a storytelling way.
55:45
SPEAKER_03: And you you mentioned earlier that you did some stand-up comedy for a while.
55:49
SPEAKER_03: God, please, please share that as our as our end story to wrap things up.
55:54
SPEAKER_03: Because that's fun.
55:56
SPEAKER_00: That started with me working at the dealership, just being me.
55:59
SPEAKER_00: And when you're worldly and you've traveled around the world and you're always the new kid, you know, living in Africa.
56:04
SPEAKER_00: I lived in Africa for four years, in Kano, Nigeria, in a small village of 600 natives.
56:08
SPEAKER_00: In a village.
56:09
SPEAKER_01: Wow.
56:09
SPEAKER_00: And so when you're the only chubby little white boy in a native of Nigeria, and you have to make yourself appealing, right?
56:17
SPEAKER_00: So you're funny and you do things like the old saying of I was the class clown.
56:21
SPEAKER_00: Well, I was the cla the village clown, right?
56:23
SPEAKER_00: Or whatever it was that need to be.
56:25
SPEAKER_00: So that I that was always in me.
56:27
SPEAKER_00: So here I am years later at the dealership working for a Volvo dealership, being me.
56:31
SPEAKER_00: And there are about 28 technicians that work in this dealership.
56:34
SPEAKER_00: Large multi-million dollar dealership.
56:36
SPEAKER_00: We're all getting together.
56:37
SPEAKER_00: And then so one day, one of the technicians says, Dude, you're so funny.
56:41
SPEAKER_00: You really should do stand-up.
56:43
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I don't know, I can't do that.
56:45
SPEAKER_00: No, no, you should.
56:46
SPEAKER_00: My girlfriend's brother works at a comedy club and they have open mic night.
56:51
SPEAKER_00: You should do it.
56:52
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, nah, I don't know.
56:53
SPEAKER_00: I don't think I can.
56:54
SPEAKER_00: Dude, just talk to her.
56:56
SPEAKER_00: Okay, long story short, he he he pushed me, pushed me.
56:59
SPEAKER_00: Finally, like two months later, she comes in.
57:01
SPEAKER_00: He made her come into the mechanic area.
57:04
SPEAKER_00: He's like, look, come Monday night.
57:06
SPEAKER_00: Just get up and do like five minutes.
57:07
SPEAKER_00: Talk, I'll I'll introduce you to my boyfriend.
57:09
SPEAKER_00: He's the MC.
57:10
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
57:10
SPEAKER_00: So I go over there and I talk to him.
57:12
SPEAKER_00: He goes, Yeah, what do you want to talk about?
57:13
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I don't know.
57:14
SPEAKER_00: What should I talk about?
57:14
SPEAKER_00: Well, you said you travel around the world.
57:16
SPEAKER_00: Can you do accents?
57:17
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, yeah, I could do accents.
57:18
SPEAKER_00: What can you do?
57:19
SPEAKER_00: I could do Pakistani, I could do India, whatever.
57:22
SPEAKER_00: New Yorker, Jewish, you name it.
57:24
SPEAKER_00: Okay, great.
57:24
SPEAKER_00: Put that together and write something down and get up on stage tonight.
57:28
SPEAKER_00: Come back at six o'clock.
57:29
SPEAKER_00: All right.
57:30
SPEAKER_00: So I come back at six and I'm up on stage.
57:33
SPEAKER_00: And the problem was that I'd never heard myself on the microphone before.
57:38
SPEAKER_00: So it echoed.
57:39
SPEAKER_00: It echoed.
57:40
SPEAKER_00: And I froze.
57:43
SPEAKER_00: And I look down and I go, oh, I forgot what to say.
57:48
SPEAKER_00: And they all started laughing.
57:49
SPEAKER_00: They thought that was part of the gig.
57:52
SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, oh, okay.
57:54
SPEAKER_00: And that's why I'm like, okay, wait, wait, wait, wait.
57:56
SPEAKER_00: Now I can take, well, I didn't really forget.
57:58
SPEAKER_00: And I just went into this whole thing.
58:01
SPEAKER_00: And I got a standing ovation.
58:04
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
58:04
SPEAKER_00: Like literally, of 120 people, whatever there was, on an open mic night.
58:09
SPEAKER_00: What validated that's I get off and the guy high-fives me and goes, Oh man, you gotta make this, you gotta come back and do this.
58:15
SPEAKER_00: The actual opening act comes like, Well, I can't follow that Shahe Hey guy now.
58:20
SPEAKER_00: And I was like, Oh, okay.
58:22
SPEAKER_00: So now his material wasn't as funny as mine.
58:24
SPEAKER_00: And that started a whole ball thing, and I thought, all right, maybe I can do this.
58:27
SPEAKER_00: And I started doing it.
58:28
SPEAKER_00: And for a while there, in the early uh late 80s, early 90s, I literally parked my toolbox at home and I found an agent and I started touring comedy and went to New York and Canada and all over.
58:43
SPEAKER_00: And I got a chance to open up uh at the Mirage for Sam Kennison in Vegas.
58:48
SPEAKER_00: Uh, did like, you know, eight minutes among three other comedians.
58:51
SPEAKER_00: And I thought I was it, right?
58:53
SPEAKER_00: I thought that was it.
58:54
SPEAKER_00: Wow.
58:55
SPEAKER_00: They gave me a check and I'm green room limousine ride to the airport.
59:00
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, wow, like this is it, right?
59:02
SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna I made it.
59:03
SPEAKER_00: I'm never gonna be a mechanic again.
59:05
SPEAKER_00: I get to the airport, I land, and that time it was there was no terminal three or four, it was terminal two.
59:12
SPEAKER_00: So we land, I get out, it was in July, June, I think.
59:16
SPEAKER_00: I walk out in the heat to my Dotson 210 with no air conditioning.
59:22
SPEAKER_00: And I'm driving home on 44th Street, there was no 51 then, to go back north.
59:28
SPEAKER_01: Sure.
59:28
SPEAKER_00: And I just sweating, going, I didn't make it.
59:31
SPEAKER_00: I didn't make it.
59:32
SPEAKER_00: Like, you know, it humbles you very quickly, like where you were an hour and a half, two hours ago to where you are now.
59:38
SPEAKER_00: And so, but what made that happen for me was that as time went by, the blessing is that I'm able to soften the bad news to my clients with comedy and and make it a little easier.
59:49
SPEAKER_00: So it's it's come in handy.
59:50
SPEAKER_03: Comedy is fun, anyways.
59:52
SPEAKER_03: Like, I just think that that's such a such a lovely thing.
59:54
SPEAKER_03: And also, if you've ever lived in Arizona without air conditioning, that's how you build character.
59:59
SPEAKER_03: I had an old sob that was the same.
1:00:01
SPEAKER_03: It was like no air conditioning, it'll be fine.
1:00:03
SPEAKER_03: You know, only one summer of that.
1:00:05
SPEAKER_03: So my goodness.
1:00:06
SPEAKER_03: Shahe, thank you so much for coming.
1:00:07
SPEAKER_03: Will you tell our tell our listeners how to find you?
1:00:10
SPEAKER_03: Yes, of course.
1:00:10
SPEAKER_00: Um, my auto repair shop is at uh Masvo Auto Care, and it's at 4610 North Seventh Street, just south of Highland on 7th Street.
1:00:18
SPEAKER_00: And everything I do, podcasts, uh, books, everything is found on carconfidential.net.
1:00:24
SPEAKER_00: Blogs, videos, interviews, books, and everything related to my auto repair shop is there, or also masvo.com.
1:00:30
SPEAKER_03: Nice.
1:00:31
SPEAKER_03: I do want to say really quickly, I love that you do the every you know couple of times a year where you bring people in and show them kudos.
1:00:37
SPEAKER_03: Like that is just teaching that that's what I call like the university of life, right?
1:00:41
SPEAKER_03: Like just teaching people these are just basic things that everybody should know about.
1:00:45
SPEAKER_00: If any of your listeners want that, just send me an email at masvo.com and say, sign me up, and I'll put you on the email list, and I'll usually email blast like three weeks before.
1:00:55
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
1:00:55
SPEAKER_00: It'll be on a Saturday.
1:00:56
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
1:00:57
SPEAKER_00: And it's it's a free class and it's very, very empowering.
1:01:00
SPEAKER_00: It's something that I think anybody who's never even been afraid to open up the hood should do.
1:01:05
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, genius.
1:01:06
SPEAKER_03: Plan on seeing all three of my kids at the next one.
1:01:09
SPEAKER_03: Okay, that's our time for today.
1:01:10
SPEAKER_03: If something hit, uh stirred, or lit a fire under you and you've got thoughts, questions, or a story you're ready to share, slide into our DMs or email us at ladies at Let's Get Naked Podcast.com.
1:01:20
SPEAKER_03: If you believe in these conversations, help us keep them rolling.
1:01:22
SPEAKER_03: Follow, share, rate, review, do all the things, and we will catch you next time.
1:01:26
SPEAKER_03: That's a wrap.
1:01:27
SPEAKER_00: Thank you.