Latest / Topeka Bible Church Audio Archive / February 12, 2019 | Expresso - Ruth Mahner

Transcript

February 12, 2019 | Expresso - Ruth Mahner · Topeka Bible Church Audio Archive

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: First things first, yes, I am Jim Congden's little sister.
• 0:08
  SPEAKER_00: There are 12 Congdon children.
• 0:10
  SPEAKER_00: Jim is number two.
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_00: He is the eldest son, which often confuses people because they think that means he's the oldest child.
• 0:18
  SPEAKER_00: He is not.
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_00: My sister Rachel is older.
• 0:21
  SPEAKER_00: She's actually not in this picture.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_00: But uh if you're here hoping to hear stories about Jim, um, I can just pause for a minute so that you can leave because you're not gonna hear his story.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_00: He went to college when I was four.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_00: So the only story you're gonna hear tonight will be mine.
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, am I done?
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, no.
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_00: Birth order books don't have a lot to say about an eighth child who is a girl who follows six boys in a row.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_00: But the thing that's important to remember is that I'm one of the Cognans who does not like public speaking, and I am not comfortable with this.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_00: Jim might keep you late.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_00: I'm quite as likely to let you go early.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_00: As I thought about my story, I realized a few things.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_00: I realized I can't possibly tell my whole story.
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_00: Every person on earth lives a new story every single day.
• 1:27
  SPEAKER_00: Things happen on the way to work or in line at Dylan's or at the post office that God uses to teach you about yourself and to bring you closer to Christ.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_00: Every moment like that is a story of its own.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_00: So what you're gonna get tonight are selected excerpts of my story.
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_00: And they fall roughly into three categories.
• 1:50
  SPEAKER_00: The first category covers uh the first 18 or 20 years or so, and you may not think this is a little bit low.
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_00: Can I lift it up a little?
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_00: Does it not go up?
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_00: I will just lean a little bit.
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_00: I'm I'm okay leaning.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_00: I can lean.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_00: Uh the first category covers the first 18 to 20 years, roughly.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_00: It might not be very encouraging.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_00: It is that being a godly, faithful, dedicated parent is no guarantee that your children will behave as they ought.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_00: My parents loved the Lord.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_00: They had regular family devotions where we all read the Bible, we sang hymns, we prayed together.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_00: We not only prayed before every meal, we were required to read to quote scripture verses before every meal.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_00: Um, sorry, not used to leaning.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_00: They emphasized hard work, they emphasized education, they had us all in church every Sunday morning, every Sunday night, every Wednesday night.
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_00: They were flawed people, as we all are, but they were the best parents they knew how to be.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_00: I was immersed in my Christian upbringing, and I accepted Christ as my savior when I was four years old.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_00: And yet, and yet I made some pretty bad choices as I made my way from childhood to adulthood.
• 3:27
  SPEAKER_00: And I did all of those choices in the company of my lifelong best friend, my sister Rebecca.
• 3:35
  SPEAKER_00: Rebecca is two years younger than I, and from the earliest time I can remember, we were two halves of a whole person.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_00: We roamed together not because we had to, but by choice.
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_00: We dressed alike, we talked alike, we thought alike, and when we rebelled, we rebelled together.
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_00: From as early as grade school, we tested the boundaries, and when we met with resistance, we looked for creative ways to circumvent those barriers.
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_00: As teenagers, we frequently left our bedroom at night, walking silently on the gravel driveway to meet our friends in a waiting car at the vacant lot next door.
• 4:13
  SPEAKER_00: We didn't do anything bad, we told ourselves.
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_00: We did homework.
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_00: We went to midnight movies, we sat at 24-hour diners talking and eating French fries.
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_00: But it was the beginning of a trend of unwise decisions.
• 4:29
  SPEAKER_00: I graduated from high school two years ahead of Rebecca, so I went to Multnomah School of the Bible, where my father was head of the theology department, to kill some time for a year.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_00: At Multnomah's orientation, I was handed a booklet that contained the rules, and we were we would be tested on it, we were told, to make sure that we understood what was expected of us at Multnomah.
• 4:50
  SPEAKER_00: I passed the test easily, and I kept the booklet handy in my top desk drawer all year so that I could cross out each rule as I broke it.
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_00: Some of the rules were minor, almost laughable.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_00: Female students were not to leave campus without signing out with the residence hall director.
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_00: So one sunny day I walked to front campus.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_00: I turned around and I looked at the windows of the administration building behind me.
• 5:21
  SPEAKER_00: I crossed the street.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_00: And then I crossed it back.
• 5:28
  SPEAKER_00: Another rule stipulated that we were only to enter and exit campus buildings by a door.
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_00: So one day I climbed into an open window to get to class.
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_00: I was never reprimanded for these minor infractions, but the dean of students did not know about all the other rules that I was privately breaking.
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_00: After my year at Multnomah, I decided to take a year off.
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_00: My parents were not happy about this decision, but I did it anyway.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_00: I worked and I took piano lessons, and I spent a lot of time with people who had no moral compass.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_00: At the end of that year, Rebecca finally graduated from high school, and as we had both been accepted to Wheaton College, she as a freshman and I as a transfer, off we went to Chicago.
• 6:18
  SPEAKER_00: 2,000 miles from home, we continued to do as we pleased.
• 6:23
  SPEAKER_00: We were very frustrated upon first settling in at Wheaton because we had decided ahead of time that we were going to seek out that underground culture and see what it had to offer.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_00: About a week into the school year, we looked at each other and said, Mom must be praying.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_00: We knew, we just knew that there were pockets of students who would buck the rules, who wouldn't care what they were supposed to do.
• 6:54
  SPEAKER_00: But everyone we met was just a sunny little Christian.
• 6:58
  SPEAKER_00: Was very frustrating.
• 7:01
  SPEAKER_00: However, God will not prevent you from having your own way if you're determined.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_00: And within a month or two we had found our niche.
• 7:09
  SPEAKER_00: And here is where the second point comes into play.
• 7:13
  SPEAKER_00: God does not let his children run forever.
• 7:17
  SPEAKER_00: He will eventually tug them back.
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_00: He won't force them, but his hand will be unmistakable.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_00: In my case, God's tugs came quietly at first.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_00: An older man whose opinion I valued looked at me with a piercing gaze and asked me how my walk with God was going.
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_00: It bothered me that he would ask that, but I kind of laughed it off.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_00: A letter came from someone I barely knew, saying that they were probably out of line and they were so sorry, but they just felt God telling them to write me this letter talking about the importance of sexual purity.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_00: They were so sorry, they didn't mean to offend me, but they weren't able to get it off of their mind.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_00: The nerve of her.
• 8:10
  SPEAKER_00: Those tugs nagged at me, sometimes for a few days, sometimes for longer.
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes I thought I would maybe change my ways, but I didn't.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_00: And then in the winter of 1982, God tugged very hard.
• 8:27
  SPEAKER_00: Some whispers about my behavior had reached the ears of the student development office, and some inquiries were made.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_00: And in a very painful meeting, I was told that Wheaton College might not be the best place for me.
• 8:40
  SPEAKER_00: And when I went home for Christmas, I should not plan to come back.
• 8:46
  SPEAKER_00: This was devastating.
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_00: For one thing, Rebecca was not being kicked out.
• 8:53
  SPEAKER_00: For another thing, how would I tell my parents?
• 8:56
  SPEAKER_00: My great-great grandfather had founded Wheaton College.
• 8:59
  SPEAKER_00: The meeting was taking place in the building that bore his name.
• 9:03
  SPEAKER_00: I was a fifth generation student, and four of my brothers had attended the school ahead of me.
• 9:08
  SPEAKER_00: I was being expelled.
• 9:11
  SPEAKER_00: The dean of students explained that I was welcome to return the next fall if I chose to take certain actions that would let them know I was taking my education and Wheaton's expectations seriously.
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_00: I went home.
• 9:25
  SPEAKER_00: I faced my parents.
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_00: I lied to them.
• 9:29
  SPEAKER_00: They probably knew I was lying.
• 9:32
  SPEAKER_00: For the next semester, I was in Oregon and Rebecca was at Wheaton.
• 9:36
  SPEAKER_00: I knew that I was at a fork in the road.
• 9:39
  SPEAKER_00: I could grit my teeth and say, my way, and continue digging that hole.
• 9:46
  SPEAKER_00: Or I could look up and find a way out.
• 9:50
  SPEAKER_00: My third point is there is redemption.
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_00: There is always redemption.
• 9:57
  SPEAKER_00: That last semester at Wheaton, I had felt like I was sinking into a chasm out of which there was no escape, but I was looking around for help.
• 10:07
  SPEAKER_00: I needed only to look up.
• 10:10
  SPEAKER_00: During the semester that I was gone from Wheaton, I attended a small school near my parents' home.
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_00: I started praying again.
• 10:18
  SPEAKER_00: I studied the Bible.
• 10:21
  SPEAKER_00: And in the fall of 1983, I went back to Wheaton.
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_00: I made new friends.
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_00: Rebecca hit a wall of her own and left school to marry her boyfriend.
• 10:30
  SPEAKER_00: I graduated from Wheaton a couple of years later and moved to Kansas, where I met Ken here at TBC.
• 10:37
  SPEAKER_00: We were married in 1987, and when we started a family in 1991, I left my job at the Mininger Clinic to homeschool our four children.
• 10:49
  SPEAKER_00: Photo 4.
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
• 10:55
  SPEAKER_00: They weren't this young when I started this old when I started homeschooling them.
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_00: Twenty-five years later, with homeschooling in my rear view mirror, I went back to the workforce and I am now happily settled at the Kansas Department of Health and Environment.
• 11:10
  SPEAKER_00: I'm going to just mention a couple of things about that time period between the end of my rebellion and now.
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_00: There isn't nearly enough time for it all.
• 11:21
  SPEAKER_00: During that wilderness semester, when I was away from Wheaton and rediscovering God, I also discovered the realness of spiritual warfare.
• 11:31
  SPEAKER_00: God had tugged me back, and I had begun to move away from my sin.
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_00: That semester, I felt the presence of evil around me and the great conflict of spiritual forces, like I had never experienced before or since.
• 11:46
  SPEAKER_00: Satan does not release his slaves without a fight.
• 11:51
  SPEAKER_00: But if God tugs you back, he will never abandon you.
• 11:57
  SPEAKER_00: I knew I was not alone, and I knew I never needed to be alone.
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_00: On the other hand, being in fellowship with God does not mean you get smooth sailing.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_00: There have been deserts and valleys along my path.
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_00: Most notably, along with my four births, I suffered four miscarriages.
• 12:20
  SPEAKER_00: Each one was a unique heartbreak.
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_00: Each one taught me something about myself and about the God whose grace is always sufficient.
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_00: It hasn't always been an easy road, but it has been the right one.
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_00: The four Maynard children are all grown now.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_00: Abe is a youth pastor in Norman, Oklahoma, and his wife Corey is a nurse.
• 12:45
  SPEAKER_00: Kinna and her husband Connor are involved in the young adult ministry and volunteer with the junior hires here at TBC.
• 12:56
  SPEAKER_00: Leah is teaching school in Hungary and working with a local church there to start a youth group.
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_00: And Jana, my youngest, is in her second year of legal studies at Washburn.
• 13:08
  SPEAKER_00: Some years ago, a young woman here at the church asked me what I would want my children to know if I could teach them only one thing.
• 13:19
  SPEAKER_00: My children were quite a bit younger then, and I know she thought I would say something about reading the Bible or being kind or staying in school.
• 13:27
  SPEAKER_00: I said, There is always redemption.
• 13:32
  SPEAKER_00: She was surprised and wanted an explanation.
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_00: And I told her, My children will fail as I did.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_00: Some of their failures will be small, but some will be crushing.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_00: There will be times when the world around them will look so dark they will not see a way out.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_00: I want them to know that they will never do anything so bad that God cannot redeem it.
• 13:59
  SPEAKER_00: They will never know pain so deep that God cannot heal it.
• 14:04
  SPEAKER_00: There is never a time or a situation when they need to be alone.
• 14:10
  SPEAKER_00: They need only to look up.
• 14:12
  SPEAKER_00: God's hand will be there waiting.
• 14:15
  SPEAKER_00: It might not be the redemption they imagine.
• 14:19
  SPEAKER_00: It might not be the redemption they want.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_00: But if they take that hand and go where it leads, they will find their way.
• 14:29
  SPEAKER_00: That's what I want them to know.
• 14:31
  SPEAKER_00: That's the most important thing I've learned.
• 14:34
  SPEAKER_00: I have a verse pinned to the bulletin board in the preschool department where I coordinate the Sunday morning classes.
• 14:41
  SPEAKER_00: It's a verse I had my children learn when they were young.
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_00: It's 1 Chronicles, sorry, 28, 9.
• 14:48
  SPEAKER_00: And it's part of King David's final words to his son Solomon before he died.
• 14:54
  SPEAKER_00: And it says this, as for you, my son Solomon, I usually put my name in it, so I'm going to change it.
• 15:04
  SPEAKER_00: As for you, Ruth, know the God of your father and serve him with a whole heart and a willing mind.
• 15:12
  SPEAKER_00: For the Lord searches all hearts and understands every intent of the thoughts.
• 15:19
  SPEAKER_00: If you seek him, he will let you find him.
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_00: But if you forsake him, he will reject you forever.
• 15:26
  SPEAKER_00: If you seek him, he will let you find him.
• 15:33
  SPEAKER_00: I loved that phrase.
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_00: We can run from him, and he lets us go for a while.
• 15:41
  SPEAKER_00: But if we seek him, he will let us find him, and that's where my story rests.