Latest / All Figured Out with Andrea Barr: Figuring Out Work, Life and Parenting / 100. Solo: the messy magic of consistency and CELEBRATING 100 EPISODES

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100. Solo: the messy magic of consistency and CELEBRATING 100 EPISODES · All Figured Out with Andrea Barr: Figuring Out Work, Life and Parenting

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  Welcome back to the All Figured Out Podcast.
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  My name is Andre Gabbar and I am the host of the show that has
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  just hit it's 100th episode. I, I can't even believe it.
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  I can't believe that three years ago, in my first trimester of
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  pregnancy with my son, my second baby, I got up the courage to do
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  this. And that not only was I not one
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  of those podcasts that launches in a big splashy way, I'm not
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  naming names Megan Merkel, but that I launched slow, steady,
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  and I freaking continued with it.
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  I, I'm really proud and I don't say that very often, but I'm
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  really proud of that. I'm really proud of this show.
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  But more than anything, I am so proud of the listeners, you all
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  for what you have been up to. The messages that I get, I mean,
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  it's kind of an anonymous platform, going to be honest to
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  see the numbers come in and know people listen but have no idea
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  who's out there. But every so often I get a
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  beautiful message from a listener talking about something
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  that they've implemented and something that's just changed
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  the game, even in a small way or in some cases a really big way
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  for them. And that fuels this fire.
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  I think you can probably tell by this point if you've been
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  listening for a bit or if you're new here.
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  I do tend to wear my heart on my sleeve and I freaking love this
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  podcast and I love all of you. And I want to say such a
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  heartfelt thank you for listening.
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  If you were listening to this episode, I have a feeling you've
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  you've listened to a few. And if that is the case, I just
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  want to thank you from the bottom of my heart.
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  This has been an incredible experience, a huge learning
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  curve and man, what a what a chapter of like self discovery
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  learning a new craft, a craft that feels really good, but is
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  is new. It's a new platform and like I
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  always say, we are just getting started.
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  So thank you again. Now, it has definitely taken me
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  a while to sit down to record this particular episode.
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  I sat down before this to reflect on what it has taken to
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  produce these last 100 episodes and first I reflected on why it
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  feels so hard to prepare for this.
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  Like I was getting kind of meta. It was like, why does 100 feel
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  like such a big deal? And I've come to realize that it
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  is so much easier for me to turn the mic around and interview
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  someone. I get to sink into someone's
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  story like a really good movie to fuel my never ending
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  curiosity for learning about people and their stories and
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  what got them where they are and how they're making things work
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  in this wild, fun, exhausting, soul fulfilling era of being a
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  parent. And I get to dive into their
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  expertise in areas that I know either little or nothing about.
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  But my own stuff, my own story, I I find boring.
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  When someone asks me about my weekend, I'm going to be honest,
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  I think, well, that's not really that fun.
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  I've, I've already lived it and I took some photos and now I'm
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  thinking about what's next. And I'm thinking about learning
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  something I don't know. And you know what I want to
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  learn more about. And I'm just like, I'm future,
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  future focused. I live in the present.
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  And then I'm like, OK, that was fun.
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  What's next? But yeah, to look back and
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  reflect, it's hard to talk about my own journey versus someone
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  else's journey. Again, that's boring to me.
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  But like I would tell my clients, it is so important to
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  honor the past and it's even more important to pause to
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  reflect and freaking celebrate because 100 episodes is a big
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  deal. And it's a really big deal to
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  me. Because to me, it proves to
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  myself that I can be consistent, that I can follow my boundless
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  Dr. energy and passion for lifelong learning.
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  And in so many ways I can be inconsistent.
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  If I'm being honest. As a woman, I have a cycle that
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  fluctuates a ton. As a mother, I can be super
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  wired 1 moment dropping in real like so hot in the living room
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  and a dance party and then the second bedtime is done I can
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  turn into such a couch potato to the point where I have to tell
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  my husband like I am no longer available for communication.
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  And it's not about being constantly on one note, 1 even
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  tone or one vibe. Like I'm not striving to be just
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  the same all the time. But for me, it's about being
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  consistent with my purpose and my integrity.
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  And that's also something I talk to a lot of clients about.
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  I have always chastised myself for being inconsistent.
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  I'm getting real real here. OK, so I personally love to
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  start, but I don't love the completion.
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  I love the process of making new friends, but I'm not necessarily
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  the friend who will message you every single day to ask what you
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  want for lunch. But when we catch up a few times
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  a year, you're going to get all of me.
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  And when I worked in the corporate world, the
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  expectations of showing up to work and get the job done was
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  enough pressure to keep me consistent.
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  It was like this forced consistency and I'm also a
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  people pleaser, so I would do a good job so that I wouldn't
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  disappoint you. And now as an entrepreneur for
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  over three years, which is crazy, being full time in my
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  business for over three years, I was really nervous about how I
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  would maintain consistency. I'm going to be honest, that was
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  my biggest fear. I built a business with coaching
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  clients who need me to be consistent with them, to be a
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  steady Eddie and a journey that can be really naturally leaving
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  them feeling uneasy. Whether that's job searching
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  after a layoff or navigating the process of heading on to a
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  parental leave. Like those are those are things
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  that my clients need me to be consistent with.
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  And I've done a great job of that.
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  I've had moments where I've had to really like reregulate
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  myself, but the my why and my purpose around supporting
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  parents really fuels that. And then there is this podcast.
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  This is something that, like I said, I birthed when I was in my
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  first trimester of pregnancy with my second child.
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  I had a year and a half year old baby when I launched the
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  podcast. A husband, a new business, the
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  baby that was in my belly, and I had such a wild desire to
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  support parents in an even bigger way.
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  I have the privilege of getting to know some of the world's best
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  experts in the personal and professional development space,
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  many of whom are parents themselves who know how to apply
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  their expertise to this population of high performing
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  but yet really gentle parents. And I think that was, that was
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  the thing for me where I was like, wow, I have access to
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  incredible experts just based on my network and the people that
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  I've been meeting and collaborating with.
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  And then I have access to these like insane high performing
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  parents as well. And it just felt like I, yeah,
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  I've, I've like, I've got to bring all this together and
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  amplify it in a bigger way. And to be honest, like I've
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  always said, I have such an appetite for learning that
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  there's a lot of things that I wanted to learn about.
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  So selfishly, I wanted to just figure things out alongside you.
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  And that's how the podcast was born.
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  And there is still so much that I haven't fully figured out.
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  And I honestly never hope to arrive.
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  I don't want to figure everything out in the world
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  because I feel like that's just so boring.
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  But the one thing that I have figured out after 35 years of
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  life is that the only thing we all need to be quote UN quote
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  consistent with is being true to yourself.
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  I know that sounds cheesy, but like I'm talking your values,
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  I'm talking your dreams, I'm talking your passions, your
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  boundaries, your vision for a beautiful life with your family,
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  whatever shape that takes for you and your family, that is
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  yours and yours alone. And your messy pursuit of that
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  is the only measure of consistency that I think you
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  really need to think about. Like when you're talking about
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  consistency, who cares how many times you go to the gym if you
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  go to the gym on the exact same day, if you eat the right thing
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  and you eat your vegetables consistently every single day?
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  Like that stuff, that's habits and that's fine and that gets
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  you. But really, like, the only thing
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  that really matters that I have found out in my short 35 years
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  of life is that if you were being true to you, you're being
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  true to what you actually care about.
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  You are working towards building and reiterating and creating a
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  life that you love and that you're obsessed with.
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  Like that's, that's it. That's the stuff.
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  That's the stuff. And that is what I have been
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  learning from our guests along the way.
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  So if you are new here, scroll on back.
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  I swear I'm not one of those podcasters that's like, oh,
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  don't go to the first few episodes.
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  Go to the first few episodes. They're amazing.
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  There's some incredible experts that I have on.
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  There's a couple solo episodes. You can hear my story, hear my
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  husband's story. Like there's some, there's some
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  gold, and I hope it supports you in pursuing your passions and
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  building the life that you're absolutely obsessed with.
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  So I today am celebrating this manifestation of consistently
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  doing something that I love with my whole heart.
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  Over the past 100 episodes and nearly three years of recording,
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  this show has reached 40 countries, had nearly 10,000
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  downloads in total. Featured conversations with
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  parents, entrepreneurs, doctors, coaches, authors, and everyday
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  people who were brave enough to share their stories.
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  We have covered everything from career pivots, resumes, and
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  leadership development to parenting, mental health, sleep,
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  money, and relationships. But the thing that I am most
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  proud to brag about is the fact that, like I said earlier, I
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  continue to get messages from listeners who have had a spark
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  of inspiration that has changed the game for them.
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  From inspiring really big career pivots to people realizing the
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  value in a Sunday calendar ritual, which my husband and I
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  do every week, this podcast has grown from a tiny idea I had
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  while being pregnant and exhausted.
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  And it has grown into this library that I love of stories,
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  strategies, and encouragement that I really hope you and all
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  your parent friends will come back to again and again and
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  again. I have listened to episodes and
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  you better believe we are just getting started.
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  So from the bottom of my heart, I want to thank you for
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  listening. And whether you have let me know
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  you're a listener or not, I don't even care because it's not
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  about me. Never has been.
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  It is all about you. So know that I am cheering you
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  on. I am cheering me on for 100
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  episodes. And to wrap this love letter to
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  you, I want to bring you an impromptu interview that I did
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  with my 4 year old daughter a few weeks ago when the house was
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  quiet and I just so happened to have my podcasting gear all set
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  up. And so my guest today is Addie
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  Barr. She is an accomplished scooter.
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  She is an artist whose medium of choice is glitter tape and
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  printer paper. She hails from North Vancouver,
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  BC, where she lives with her parents and her little brother
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  with whom she calls Bro Bro or hey, whenever he's taking
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  something of hers that she does not want him to take.
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  So without further ado, I bring you Addie Bar Welcome back to
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  the All Figured Out podcast. I'm your host, Andrea Barr, and
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  I'm joined by my daughter. Addie.
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  Buddy, welcome to the All Figured Out podcast.
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  It is great to have you here. Hmm.
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  Now, Adeline, how old are you at the time of this recording?
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  I'm four years old. Well, and what is your favorite
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  thing to do as a four year old? Hmm, play with my brother.
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  What's your brother's name? Brody.
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  What do you guys like to play? Do you like to play games and
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  they like to play? Games nice.
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  Sometimes burning knocks on my tower and I don't like that.
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  What do you do when he knocks over your tower?
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  How do you get through that? That sounds really hard.
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  To say stop but and then I don't play anymore.
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  OHP dear, is that hard? Yeah.
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  Yeah. Now Addie, we have been talking
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  a lot about kindness recently and this very special superpower
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  that you have called. Kindness.
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  Superpower. Can you tell me a little bit
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  about how you use it? I use it as I try to get my
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  friends together cause they wanna be separate but I have to
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  get them together cause they don't want them together.
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  OHP and how do you do that? I try to like get one and they
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  get 2. OHP and and What does kindness
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  mean to you? What does kindness mean?
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  It means like you, you help one another.
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  That sounds so beautiful. What is it like to be kind?
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  It's become like you try to get one person to to to talk to them
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  and talk to another person to get them back together.
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  Nice, that sounds really special.
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  How do you use kindness with your little brother?
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  And I try to use kindness, but every time I try to use
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  kindness, birdies walks away sometimes.
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  How does he show you kindness? And he doesn't.
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  He doesn't share toys with me. That's not kind.
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  How about when you hurt yourself?
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  What does he usually say to you? Are you OK?
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  Are you OK? Are you?
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  OK, Yeah. Now, recently you had a little a
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  little fall on your bicycle. Do you wanna tell us a little
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  bit about what happened? Yeah, I was bike riding and then
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  I fell face 1st and then I saw my hand and I got this.
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  Hey, a little gap. OHS and how did you get through
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  that? I had to go to the dentist and
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  they had to pull their teeth out and then they they had froze my
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  mouth full little bit. And did you say something funny
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  when you were in the dentist chair?
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  Yeah, let's get out of here. Oh my goodness, you are such a
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  brave and resilient little girl. I love you.
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  I love you too. That wasn't a question.
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  I just wanted to say I love you. Is there anything else that you
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  want to share on the podcast? Play.
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  Hmm. Let What's something that you
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  wanna tell all the kids of the world?
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  Is there anything that you want to tell them?
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  I really I have two best friends but now I have 3 it's I love
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  Sofia Mia. All ears.
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  Oh, we're showing your undies. Well, thank you so much for
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  joining me on the podcast. I asked this to all my guests.
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  Addie, what is something that you're still trying to figure
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  out? I don't know what they say.
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  Is there anything that you've been working on practicing
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  recently? Ohhh I'm trying to make a
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  artwork. Any particular artwork?
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  Nature And now I'm trying to make ocean, but I'm not making
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  an ocean this year. OK, well we wish you luck on the
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  ocean artwork and I hope you'll come back on again to tell us
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  updates on your artwork and kindness.
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  Bye bye. Bye bye.