Latest / Relationship Coaching Group Podcast / Who's Stringing Along Who?

Transcript

Who's Stringing Along Who? · Relationship Coaching Group Podcast

• 0:11
  SPEAKER_00: Why is love so easy to start but so hard to get right?
• 0:15
  SPEAKER_00: Situationships, mixed signals, overthinking tex?
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, we're talking about all of it.
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_00: Hello, I'm Roxanne, your host, and welcome back to Relationship Coaching Group where we stop guessing and start understanding and figure out what actually worked in today's relationships.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_00: No fluff, real talk, real talk tips, real conversations to help you date smarter, communicate better, and figure out love together.
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_00: And I want to welcome my co-host, the professor.
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_00: Hello, professor.
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_02: Hello, hello, hello, hello.
• 0:53
  SPEAKER_02: How are you today?
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_00: Doing wonderfully well, thank you.
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_02: Did you enjoy your little break?
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_00: I did, I did.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_00: It was a break well needed.
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_02: Well, folks, we um we took a little summer break, uh, spent some time with family and friends.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_02: So we hope you enjoyed your uh summer before the kids go back to school and and you start getting busy again.
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_00: Yep.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_00: Well, today's topic, Professor, is an interesting one.
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_00: It's who's stringing along who?
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_00: Hmm that's a good one.
• 1:31
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_00: So many, so many of my clients, you they're the comment that they say is, I'm being strung along, or he's stringing me along, she's stringing me along.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_00: Well, we're gonna touch bases on this topic.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, because that's um this is one of those topics that constantly comes up.
• 1:56
  SPEAKER_02: They don't know where they are in this relationship.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_02: Uh do they even have a relationship being strung along?
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_02: So let's have what you got.
• 2:05
  SPEAKER_00: Let's let's go for it.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_00: So question from the top is what if the biggest question in your relationship isn't do they love me?
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_00: But who's actually stringing along who?
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_00: Is it them?
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_00: Is it you?
• 2:23
  SPEAKER_00: Or oh or are both of you playing a game where nobody wants to admit the truth?
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_00: So sometimes you the I'm sure they're wondering, is it them?
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_00: And they're holding on to hope.
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_00: What do you think, Professor?
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_02: Sometimes that string is long, sometimes it's short.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_02: Sometimes there's no string at all.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_02: I think that it's become normal.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_02: In today's society, it's become normal to string someone along.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_02: And it's almost until maybe something else comes along better.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_00: Got it, got it.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_00: Well, mixed signals are not a love language.
• 3:06
  SPEAKER_00: Did you know that?
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_00: You know, they're love languages, right?
• 3:09
  SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
• 3:09
  SPEAKER_00: Well, mixed signals is not one of them.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_02: I kind of guessed it.
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 3:15
  SPEAKER_00: Some people say they're confused, but never confused when they need a favor or when they're lonely.
• 3:23
  SPEAKER_00: They're not confused by that.
• 3:25
  SPEAKER_00: But a lot, you you know, and uh, we work with with couples and uh today's society, today's relationship, a lot, there's a lot of confusion in relationships.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_02: They're not upfront in a relationship.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_02: Relationships, we say this all the time communicate, communicate, and communicate, communicate some more.
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_02: But the problem is we they don't do that.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_02: We give a little bit of the time.
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_02: We let that string out a little bit and a little bit.
• 3:57
  SPEAKER_02: So the person that you're holding on to, you're just holding enough for them to wonder, is this real?
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_02: Do they really want to be with me?
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_02: Do they love me?
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_02: Do they do they uh are they attracted to me?
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_02: So we give them enough string just to string them along, maybe to wait for something better.
• 4:18
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, dating someone who gives you mixed signals, you know, it's like it's like trying to use your GPS that keeps saying, turn left.
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_00: No, no, no, wait, make a U-turn.
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_00: No, no.
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_00: Actually, you've arrived.
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_02: And that's a truth.
• 4:40
  SPEAKER_02: That's a good one.
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, thank you.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_00: And then there's the almost relationship.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_00: You talk every day, you flirt, you act like a couple, but no one wants to define it.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_00: And eventually you have to ask, are we building a relationship or just collecting memories?
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_00: But how long could that last when you're when when it's that confusing?
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_00: It's like it's almost there.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_00: I'm almost there.
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_02: People hold on to that.
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_02: That almost?
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_02: That almost.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_02: They hold on to that.
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_02: Uh there was a young man who really really was into this young lady, and they just never really got to spend time together.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_02: But they talked all the time.
• 5:33
  SPEAKER_02: So if you talk all the time, but there was never time to go out, or if there was arrangements to go out, it was cancelled, something came up.
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_02: Ooh, I think you're yeah.
• 5:45
  SPEAKER_02: You you that you hear that story?
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_02: That's always that, you know, oh, I gotta do this, oh, I gotta do that.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_02: And then when they do go out, it's real short.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_02: They go out, they eat, oh, I gotta go, I gotta go there, I gotta go to work.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_02: There's always something, so it's a very short, but they know that that person is really into them.
• 6:04
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 6:04
  SPEAKER_02: So they hold on to that chord.
• 6:07
  SPEAKER_02: So yeah.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_02: That's it's not a nice feeling when you're someone's holding your string.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, no, that can't be.
• 6:18
  SPEAKER_00: That can't be enough.
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_02: But we put up with it.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and that that's because the word hope is there hoping, yeah.
• 6:27
  SPEAKER_02: They're hoping that it's gonna be more.
• 6:29
  SPEAKER_02: It's like that girl or that guy that puts you in the friend zone and you hope there's gonna be more.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_02: Well, that's like that, but worse.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_02: Because they flirt or they even kiss you on the cheek and do all this stuff.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_02: Sometimes you haven't even slept with the person.
• 6:50
  SPEAKER_02: But they keep pulling that string along.
• 6:53
  SPEAKER_00: Yep, stringing them along.
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_00: An almost relationship is like standing outside a restaurant, smelling the food for two years, but never actually getting a table.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, say that again.
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_00: An almost relationship is like standing outside of a restaurant, smelling the food for two years, but never actually getting a table.
• 7:18
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_00: Just yeah.
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_00: You're almost there.
• 7:22
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, almost there.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_02: That's wow.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 7:27
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 7:27
  SPEAKER_02: That's worse than having the steak put in front of you and you're on that, you know.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_02: Vegan diet or something.
• 7:33
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_02: Oh that treadmill that you're constantly going around, there's that steak hanging in front, and you keep walking and it keeps going further.
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_02: Uh-huh.
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_02: You you can't get anywhere in a relationship like that.
• 7:45
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 7:45
  SPEAKER_02: It's very one-sided.
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_02: And it's normally the person who is the one playing the games and stringing you along because there's several things.
• 7:57
  SPEAKER_02: Either they're just a mean son of a gun, or they're not sure about what they want out of a relationship.
• 8:05
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 8:06
  SPEAKER_02: Or they enjoy it.
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_02: There's some people that just enjoy it's fun for them.
• 8:11
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_02: But the person that's been strong along, that person has to speak up.
• 8:18
  SPEAKER_02: Right, right.
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_02: And use their voice.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_02: And a lot of times that's That's the hard part, because they're afraid of losing them.
• 8:25
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_02: Whatever it is.
• 8:27
  SPEAKER_00: Whatever it's.
• 8:27
  SPEAKER_02: And it's nothing.
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_02: That's the problem.
• 8:29
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 8:29
  SPEAKER_02: It's not a relationship, but we're afraid of losing that hope that they will love me back.
• 8:34
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_00: And that's you're touching on where we're going here.
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_02: There you go.
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_02: I'm jumping again.
• 8:40
  SPEAKER_00: No, no, no.
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_00: You're good.
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_00: You're good.
• 8:42
  SPEAKER_00: When you're stringing yourself along, some sometimes nobody is lying to you.
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_00: Kind of what you're just saying, Professor.
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes nobody's lying to you.
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_00: You're just translating every breadcrumb into a five-course meal.
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, wow.
• 9:00
  SPEAKER_02: So it's you have a way of saying things that just like hits home.
• 9:05
  SPEAKER_02: Because it's it is.
• 9:07
  SPEAKER_02: You're uh it's that breadcrumbs.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I never thought of it like that.
• 9:12
  SPEAKER_02: It it's this perpetual breadcrumb.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_00: And you're looking at it like, oh, okay.
• 9:18
  SPEAKER_02: They they really like me.
• 9:19
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 9:20
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, oh, they're really into me.
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_02: And it's that constant, and it goes on and on until there's a blow-up or they've had enough.
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_02: But sometimes this goes on for ridiculous amounts of time.
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_02: Exactly.
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_02: And if and if this sounds like you, you should be listening very closely.
• 9:40
  SPEAKER_00: Listen closely.
• 9:43
  SPEAKER_00: And it's kind of like they they liked my Instagram story.
• 9:47
  SPEAKER_00: They said maybe next week.
• 9:50
  SPEAKER_00: But meanwhile, they've canceled the last seven dates.
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_00: Kind of what you're saying.
• 9:55
  SPEAKER_00: You know, they they they like the story, and they keep saying, well, maybe next week.
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_00: But they've canceled and they've canceled the the last seven dates.
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_00: When someone That's kind of what what you were just saying earlier.
• 10:09
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 10:10
  SPEAKER_02: When when someone constantly is canceling or rescheduling or saying, Oh, work uh uh or I've got to fly out of town, or I got there's all these excuses.
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_02: Excuses, yeah.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_02: How many more excuses?
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_02: I know there's someone out there listening that's going, oh my gosh, this is me.
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_00: Yep.
• 10:30
  SPEAKER_00: And when they s and and just like just like we're saying, sometimes they take a like from uh from their Instagram uh on their Instagram or a like on their their Facebook picture or something that they posted and they take that and they run with it.
• 10:48
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you know, and just because somebody likes a comment.
• 10:52
  SPEAKER_02: Um I've been in coffee shops, and you know I love people watching, and we love our coffee.
• 10:59
  SPEAKER_02: But I was in I've been in coffee shops where I see men and women strike up conversations, you know, and that hair thing goes back when the woman puts her hair back, you know.
• 11:11
  SPEAKER_02: And but you never there's you can see the relationship.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_02: There's well, let me say this, it's not relationship, you can see there's nothing developing to the guy, it was just coffee.
• 11:22
  SPEAKER_02: To the girl, it was, oh, he's cute, you know?
• 11:26
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 11:27
  SPEAKER_02: And then they could say goodbyes, and you can see in her face, wow, oh, hopefully we'll get to meet again soon for coffee, you know.
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_02: And then what you've just done is you just planted that seed for that guy or that girl, whoever it was, and they could run with that.
• 11:45
  SPEAKER_02: Right, right.
• 11:45
  SPEAKER_02: The little bread crumb crumb.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_02: The bread crumb.
• 11:49
  SPEAKER_00: So don't take the breadcrumb as they like me.
• 11:53
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 11:53
  SPEAKER_00: Or as a full course meal.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_00: You have to give you have to read between the lines.
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_00: Read between the lines.
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_00: And then there's with um, there's the power of potential.
• 12:08
  SPEAKER_00: Again, Professor, what you were just saying.
• 12:11
  SPEAKER_00: Many people don't fall in love with who someone is.
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_00: They fall in love with who they might become.
• 12:19
  unknown: Oh.
• 12:20
  SPEAKER_00: That potential, that hope that this might be it, this might be the one.
• 12:25
  SPEAKER_02: Fall for exactly what you said, what they could be, or what they are in their head.
• 12:33
  SPEAKER_02: They have this picture, this vision of this man or this woman, or the this, the that.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_02: We before we get to what the actual person is, we create a reality that's not real of this person.
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_02: White picket fans, you know, two and a half babies, you know, uh uh, I don't know, I say two and a half babies, baby and a puppy, you know, and we create they create this thing.
• 13:06
  SPEAKER_02: Men, women, they both do it, more women, but they create this false narrative to try and justify what what they want.
• 13:18
  SPEAKER_02: And the other person, they're not into that.
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_02: They don't see them as that.
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_02: They're either friends or but it's not what you think it is.
• 13:27
  SPEAKER_02: So the thing that they should be doing is evaluating it for what it is.
• 13:34
  SPEAKER_00: Right, right.
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_00: What what's in front of them, not what could be or what may be.
• 13:39
  SPEAKER_00: Not what your dreams are.
• 13:40
  SPEAKER_00: Right, right.
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, dating someone's potential, you know what that's like, Professor?
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_02: No.
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_00: Dating someone's potential, what they could be with what is it's like buying cake ingredients, knowing that one day it'll taste amazing.
• 13:59
  SPEAKER_02: Where do you get this stuff from?
• 14:02
  SPEAKER_02: You should write a book on your sayings.
• 14:06
  SPEAKER_02: But that's but that is so true.
• 14:08
  SPEAKER_02: We you we put all this stuff together and we we put this dream person together.
• 14:15
  SPEAKER_02: Right, right, right.
• 14:16
  SPEAKER_00: That oh wow, someday he'll be amazing.
• 14:21
  SPEAKER_00: Someday he'll he'll she'll be amazing.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_02: Yes.
• 14:24
  SPEAKER_02: And but if this person is not showing you the interest that you want right away, then let it go.
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_02: It's not for you yet.
• 14:33
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 14:34
  SPEAKER_02: Maybe it's gonna take a couple more coffee visits, but don't build this image.
• 14:38
  SPEAKER_02: You two sitting in a coffee shop, both having coffee, holding hands, and dreaming about the white pig events, because you've already made this image of this person, and then really you come to find out that this person is what you think it is.
• 14:52
  SPEAKER_00: Right, right.
• 14:53
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 14:54
  SPEAKER_00: Uh I example, I have a friend, it's actually a friend, not a client, just a friend who went on a date and come to find out he she was asked to come on this date, coming to find out he was married.
• 15:12
  SPEAKER_00: And she found out on the date.
• 15:14
  SPEAKER_00: She said, What?
• 15:16
  SPEAKER_00: She said, Of course, she's smart.
• 15:19
  SPEAKER_00: She that was it.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_00: That was it.
• 15:21
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_00: You know, why did why didn't you tell me this?
• 15:26
  SPEAKER_00: You're just you're just telling me you you you asked me to come out on this date, and now you're telling me that you have a wife at home?
• 15:33
  SPEAKER_00: Crazy.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_02: It's amazing the audacity of some people today, men and women do it.
• 15:41
  SPEAKER_02: We're not picking sides here.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_02: Right, right.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_02: And it goes both ways.
• 15:47
  SPEAKER_02: And when we when we talk on this channel, it applies to both because they both do dirty.
• 15:52
  SPEAKER_02: So but when you have someone that is willing, because when you put yourself out like that, you've just handed them the end of your string to say, hey, take me for a walk.
• 16:06
  SPEAKER_02: And that's what they're doing.
• 16:07
  SPEAKER_02: They're taking you for a walk like a good old puppy dog.
• 16:10
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_02: Because you're you don't you haven't defined, you've just put an image in your head and added a storyline to it, but you have no definement of what you want.
• 16:24
  SPEAKER_02: You've just kind of created a story.
• 16:26
  SPEAKER_02: You even said you want a man that's this, this, this.
• 16:29
  SPEAKER_02: You just created this story or a woman.
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_02: You want this in a woman, you know, and I'll give you a perfect example.
• 16:37
  SPEAKER_02: Um you've got me hooked.
• 16:40
  SPEAKER_02: Well, I'm not gonna say hooked.
• 16:41
  SPEAKER_02: I've been watching a couple more of these um pop the thing.
• 16:46
  SPEAKER_02: And you know, when you see some of these men and women of what they're looking for, and it's like, wow, that's so shallow.
• 16:57
  SPEAKER_02: You know, and when you hear some of the comments, you know, oh, you uh you don't look like this, uh, you don't have this, there's no substance to any of this anymore.
• 17:06
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 17:07
  SPEAKER_02: So when you create this story in your head and put it in your heart, that's it.
• 17:15
  SPEAKER_02: Stop making the story and the image of what someone could be and look at reality.
• 17:20
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 17:21
  SPEAKER_02: Take it for face value.
• 17:23
  SPEAKER_02: Because you just made this story up.
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_02: This guy could be married, this girl could be married, and they may be having troubles at home and they're not gonna tell you, they're gonna enjoy the ride.
• 17:35
  SPEAKER_02: Right, right.
• 17:36
  SPEAKER_02: So when a guy or a woman says, Oh, I can't make it tonight, I've got to go somewhere.
• 17:40
  SPEAKER_02: No, they're going on to the family, probably.
• 17:42
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 17:42
  SPEAKER_02: So stop making these stories in your head.
• 17:45
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, if you get so many excuses, excuses after excuses, uh, there's your sign.
• 17:52
  SPEAKER_00: There's there's your red flag.
• 17:54
  SPEAKER_00: Because if someone was into you, they wouldn't be making excuses after excuses.
• 18:00
  SPEAKER_00: They would want to get to you and get to know you and spend time with you.
• 18:04
  SPEAKER_00: And it's trying to get to know you, right?
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_02: And it's and this is let's say we're on week five, okay?
• 18:11
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 18:12
  SPEAKER_02: And he's cancelled five times in week five, right?
• 18:15
  SPEAKER_02: Five times in the five weeks.
• 18:17
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 18:17
  SPEAKER_02: What are you gonna say?
• 18:19
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, the I i it wouldn't be it wouldn't take me five five times of cancellation, maybe two.
• 18:27
  SPEAKER_00: Two, yeah.
• 18:29
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe two, maybe then yeah, then that that's yeah, that's it.
• 18:33
  SPEAKER_00: You're not ready for a relationship.
• 18:35
  SPEAKER_00: Right, right.
• 18:35
  SPEAKER_00: If someone's cancelled more than twice, if you're allowing someone to cancel more than twice, just getting to know that person, then they're not into you.
• 18:46
  SPEAKER_00: I understand stuff happened.
• 18:47
  SPEAKER_00: You had a death, and you know, you got helped up on your job.
• 18:50
  SPEAKER_02: I get that.
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_02: Right, right.
• 18:52
  SPEAKER_02: But five times, so that's one a week or twice a week, or whatever it may be.
• 18:56
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 18:57
  SPEAKER_02: Come on.
• 18:57
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you you you have to be real about it.
• 19:00
  SPEAKER_02: So there has you have to, we've talked about this boundaries.
• 19:04
  SPEAKER_02: You gotta have boundaries.
• 19:05
  SPEAKER_02: Right, definitely.
• 19:06
  SPEAKER_00: And live in the real world.
• 19:08
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 19:09
  SPEAKER_00: So you know, we we're just trying to help our listeners to protect their heart.
• 19:14
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 19:14
  SPEAKER_02: Don't be strung along by the potential of what it could be.
• 19:20
  SPEAKER_02: Exactly.
• 19:20
  SPEAKER_02: It is potential, and don't take that potential and turn it into the cake that doesn't exist.
• 19:27
  SPEAKER_00: Right, right.
• 19:28
  SPEAKER_00: You just have the ingredients and you just you have it in your head.
• 19:31
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, this would be one day this this would be amazing.
• 19:34
  SPEAKER_00: Because that might turn into that sour lemon meringue pie you want.
• 19:39
  SPEAKER_00: Well, and if you hold on to the ingredients for very for a long time, exactly.
• 19:45
  SPEAKER_00: Hello.
• 19:46
  SPEAKER_00: So if you hold on to hope for a long time, ain't no good.
• 19:50
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 19:51
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 19:51
  SPEAKER_02: If any of you want to win her heart over, uh lemon meringue pie does it every time.
• 19:58
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my goodness.
• 19:58
  SPEAKER_00: Look, it just yes.
• 20:02
  SPEAKER_00: You can no, you can't zale a pie, can you?
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_00: No, you can't zale a pie.
• 20:08
  SPEAKER_00: Darn it.
• 20:09
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 20:10
  SPEAKER_00: Convenience isn't commitment.
• 20:13
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes people enjoy your company, but not enough to build a future.
• 20:18
  SPEAKER_00: You're their comfort zone, not their destination.
• 20:23
  SPEAKER_00: What?
• 20:23
  SPEAKER_00: Say that one more time.
• 20:25
  SPEAKER_02: But someone out there needs to hear that.
• 20:27
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, I'll start from the top.
• 20:29
  SPEAKER_00: Convenience is not commitment.
• 20:32
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes people enjoy your company, but not enough to build a future.
• 20:37
  SPEAKER_00: You're you are their comfort zone, not their destination.
• 20:43
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 20:44
  SPEAKER_00: And and that ties into what we're saying, you know, about hope, about um imagining a future with somebody who keeps canceling on you.
• 20:56
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 20:56
  SPEAKER_00: You know, your comfort zone.
• 20:59
  SPEAKER_00: When they have time for you, they'll get to you.
• 21:01
  SPEAKER_02: When when you when the heart is separated from your brain, and you lead with your heart instead of thinking about what this is.
• 21:14
  SPEAKER_02: Because a lot of people straight away leave with their heart.
• 21:16
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 21:17
  SPEAKER_02: They go, Oh, oh my gosh, like he or she's other gorgeous.
• 21:23
  SPEAKER_00: He's everything that I imagined, you know, he's tall, he's built, he's he has a good job.
• 21:29
  SPEAKER_00: But then they're thinking with their heart.
• 21:31
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 21:31
  SPEAKER_00: But then when once you get to know that person, they're evil, they're cruel.
• 21:36
  SPEAKER_02: There's nothing wrong with having some feeling in your heart, but control it with your head.
• 21:41
  SPEAKER_02: Right, exactly.
• 21:42
  SPEAKER_02: Let your head take control and because sometimes your head's gonna say, Girl, what's wrong with you?
• 21:47
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 21:47
  SPEAKER_02: You know it ain't right for you, or vice versa.
• 21:50
  SPEAKER_02: You know, she ain't right for you.
• 21:52
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 21:53
  SPEAKER_02: Sometimes you gotta listen to your head because your heart is soft and tender and it's gonna be like, oh, gooshy.
• 21:59
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 22:02
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 22:03
  SPEAKER_00: And here's here's an example.
• 22:06
  SPEAKER_00: Just because someone uses your Costco card doesn't mean they're ready to share your last name.
• 22:14
  SPEAKER_00: Convenience.
• 22:15
  SPEAKER_00: It was convenient to get that card, but no, they're not ready to share that last name.
• 22:20
  SPEAKER_00: Ooh.
• 22:21
  SPEAKER_02: So Did you hear what she just said?
• 22:24
  SPEAKER_02: Give me to me one more.
• 22:26
  SPEAKER_02: They've got a they're not reading between the lines here.
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_02: Give it to me one more time.
• 22:30
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 22:30
  SPEAKER_02: The the the the pun?
• 22:32
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, give it.
• 22:33
  SPEAKER_00: Just because someone uses your Costco card doesn't mean they're ready to share your last name.
• 22:39
  SPEAKER_00: We're talking about convenience versus commitment.
• 22:42
  SPEAKER_00: There you go.
• 22:43
  SPEAKER_01: There's your sign.
• 22:44
  SPEAKER_00: There you go.
• 22:46
  SPEAKER_00: Now, what about excuses have expiration dates?
• 22:52
  SPEAKER_00: We were just talking about that.
• 22:54
  SPEAKER_00: Excuses have expiration dates.
• 22:58
  SPEAKER_00: Here's one.
• 22:59
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just busy.
• 23:00
  SPEAKER_00: Or you know what?
• 23:03
  SPEAKER_00: I I uh I would like to go out with you, but I'm working on myself.
• 23:09
  SPEAKER_00: Or it's not you.
• 23:12
  SPEAKER_00: It's me.
• 23:12
  SPEAKER_00: It's me.
• 23:15
  SPEAKER_00: Or it's not the right time.
• 23:17
  SPEAKER_00: There are so many excuses.
• 23:19
  SPEAKER_00: So many excuses.
• 23:20
  SPEAKER_00: We could go on.
• 23:20
  SPEAKER_00: We could go on.
• 23:22
  SPEAKER_02: I'll just throw in a couple of my little favorites.
• 23:24
  SPEAKER_02: Um some of the ones that have been fed back to me.
• 23:28
  SPEAKER_02: One of them.
• 23:38
  SPEAKER_02: I'm trying to remember how how she said it.
• 23:40
  SPEAKER_02: It was like hit my ate my homework.
• 23:43
  SPEAKER_02: Um the dog took my keys and I can't find my keys.
• 23:46
  SPEAKER_02: Oh wow.
• 23:47
  SPEAKER_02: That one I never heard that one.
• 23:49
  SPEAKER_02: When I heard that one, I bust at love and I was like, really?
• 23:52
  SPEAKER_02: She was like, yeah.
• 23:53
  SPEAKER_02: She said at first I I believed it, but then she said, really?
• 23:58
  SPEAKER_02: Um it's another one.
• 24:01
  SPEAKER_02: Um my car wouldn't start.
• 24:04
  SPEAKER_02: Uh I don't have enough money for gas.
• 24:08
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, there there are so many, and they get elaborate.
• 24:12
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 24:12
  SPEAKER_00: And these are just common ones.
• 24:14
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, my my brother bought my car, barred my car, and he's not back yet.
• 24:19
  SPEAKER_02: Or I'm a secret agent for the government and I have to leave the country.
• 24:24
  SPEAKER_00: Oh wow.
• 24:25
  SPEAKER_00: Oh wow.
• 24:28
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's that's that's that's taking it really far.
• 24:32
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, there's some people that do some crazy stuff.
• 24:35
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 24:35
  SPEAKER_02: But when your heart is all soft and gushy, you believe that.
• 24:40
  SPEAKER_02: Because sometimes when it's elaborate like that, people go, oh, okay.
• 24:44
  SPEAKER_00: Right, right, right.
• 24:46
  SPEAKER_00: And and how long will you be gone for?
• 24:48
  SPEAKER_02: Uh I'll be gone for about uh six months on a secret mission.
• 24:52
  SPEAKER_00: Oh.
• 24:55
  SPEAKER_00: Will you be able to call me?
• 24:57
  SPEAKER_02: I'm not sure, but I'll try and WhatsApp you.
• 25:00
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 25:01
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 25:03
  SPEAKER_00: Wow, yeah.
• 25:04
  SPEAKER_00: Yep.
• 25:06
  SPEAKER_00: Now, okay, these excuses, these excuses.
• 25:09
  SPEAKER_00: Everyone goes through busy seasons, right?
• 25:12
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 25:12
  SPEAKER_00: But years of excuses usually mean years of avoiding a decision.
• 25:18
  SPEAKER_00: If you'll if you'll not even years, months of of excuses, weeks of excuses.
• 25:24
  SPEAKER_00: They're not ready to to make a decision on you know on whether or not they want to be with you.
• 25:30
  SPEAKER_00: Comes a point when you gotta say, enough is enough.
• 25:34
  SPEAKER_00: Right, right.
• 25:34
  SPEAKER_00: Well, actually, they made the decision.
• 25:37
  SPEAKER_00: If they're giving excuses week after week, week after week, they've made that decision.
• 25:43
  SPEAKER_00: They've made it for you.
• 25:44
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 25:45
  SPEAKER_02: You just have to open your eyes.
• 25:47
  SPEAKER_00: I really like that that that and there was that movie, they're just not into you.
• 25:52
  SPEAKER_02: Oh yeah.
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_00: They're just not they're just not into you.
• 25:56
  SPEAKER_00: And but you here you are hoping that maybe, maybe okay, it's been three weeks now of excuses.
• 26:05
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe next week.
• 26:06
  SPEAKER_00: And they're they're giving you these these this tr string, they're stringing you along until they until they have time, until it's convenient for them, or they're still trying trying trying to decide whether or not they even want to go on another another date or a first date with you.
• 26:26
  SPEAKER_02: When you're being strung along, sometimes the person who's pulling the string is using that to fill any gaps in their life.
• 26:38
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 26:39
  SPEAKER_02: Now, I'm not saying they're with someone or in a relationship, but gaps that makes them happy.
• 26:45
  SPEAKER_02: They're not looking for a relationship, they're just looking to fill the gaps in their life.
• 26:49
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 26:50
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 26:51
  SPEAKER_00: And you're just one of the gaps.
• 26:53
  SPEAKER_02: That's it.
• 26:54
  SPEAKER_02: You're just a gap filler.
• 26:55
  SPEAKER_00: A gap.
• 26:57
  SPEAKER_00: Wow, we we went there.
• 26:58
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I get it.
• 27:00
  SPEAKER_02: You're just a gap filler.
• 27:01
  SPEAKER_00: A gap filler.
• 27:02
  SPEAKER_00: Don't be a gap filler.
• 27:04
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 27:04
  SPEAKER_00: You know, if you're worth more than that.
• 27:07
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 27:08
  SPEAKER_02: Listen, you're heart, you have a beautiful heart, you're a beautiful person.
• 27:12
  SPEAKER_02: You're sometimes we lead with our heart too much, and we let people take us on this journey that you don't need to go.
• 27:22
  SPEAKER_00: Right, right.
• 27:23
  SPEAKER_00: And we we see we and it's we see it in the men of today, the women of today.
• 27:30
  SPEAKER_01: Yes.
• 27:31
  SPEAKER_00: It right now it it goes both ways.
• 27:34
  SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
• 27:34
  SPEAKER_00: You know, it's not just men stringing women along.
• 27:38
  SPEAKER_00: Women string men along as well.
• 27:41
  SPEAKER_00: And I I know some really, really good, good guys, good men, working men, good looking men.
• 27:49
  SPEAKER_00: And they've been treated like nothing.
• 27:52
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 27:52
  SPEAKER_00: They've been they've yeah, they've been strung along, they've been cheated on, they've been lied, lied to, and they come to us.
• 28:02
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 28:02
  SPEAKER_00: And and I'm looking this one guy in particular, one of my clients.
• 28:07
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, all my all my male clients are good looking, but this one in particular is absolutely adorable.
• 28:15
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, too young for me.
• 28:16
  SPEAKER_00: And besides, I'm already taken.
• 28:19
  SPEAKER_02: But because if they saw your husband, they'd run.
• 28:22
  SPEAKER_02: He's a big, big dude.
• 28:25
  SPEAKER_02: But he'd be smashing ribs.
• 28:28
  SPEAKER_00: But you know, this this young man could be could be my son, actually.
• 28:33
  SPEAKER_00: But um, and when I'm hearing the stories and of being cheated on, of being lied to, and and he's looking for a real serious relationship.
• 28:44
  SPEAKER_00: And he he thought he had that three years.
• 28:48
  SPEAKER_00: He thought he had that.
• 28:50
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm just looking at him as if, oh, I wish I had a daughter.
• 28:54
  SPEAKER_02: But if if you're being strung along, and the worst thing is, if you're being strung along and you're buying stuff for that individual, or this man or a woman, and you're helping them financially, and and you're you don't get to hardly see them.
• 29:11
  SPEAKER_02: Well, no, no.
• 29:12
  SPEAKER_02: You know, oh my car, no, I I don't have enough money, or my insurance, and you're helping them out.
• 29:18
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 29:18
  SPEAKER_02: Uh stop that right now.
• 29:20
  SPEAKER_02: Stop, stop, don't stop.
• 29:22
  SPEAKER_02: Call me, call us.
• 29:23
  SPEAKER_02: Yes, and I'll tell you personally, stop.
• 29:26
  SPEAKER_02: Don't do it.
• 29:27
  SPEAKER_00: Them shoes on, those running shoes and run.
• 29:30
  SPEAKER_00: Don't do it in my relationship.
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_00: No, no, don't.
• 29:33
  SPEAKER_00: If if they're grown and they're living on their own and they come to you with excuses of why they need your help.
• 29:47
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, no, they're grown.
• 29:48
  SPEAKER_02: See them once a month, and and they call you every day to tell you there's their woes for you to oh, I can give you that twenty dollars, or I can give you fifty dollars, and they're just sucking you dry.
• 30:01
  SPEAKER_00: No.
• 30:02
  SPEAKER_00: And don't let them into if you have an apartment, whether it's by yourself or with your kids, whether you're male or female, and they're struggling, you don't want to bring them into your house.
• 30:14
  SPEAKER_00: No, let's let's let them get themselves together before you but before you even think about moving in together.
• 30:22
  SPEAKER_02: No, let's I have an idea.
• 30:24
  SPEAKER_02: For our listeners, drop us a line.
• 30:27
  SPEAKER_02: Tell us who you think is is the worst for stringing people along, men or women.
• 30:32
  SPEAKER_02: I'm curious.
• 30:34
  SPEAKER_00: That's gonna be interesting to see.
• 30:36
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 30:37
  SPEAKER_00: But the excuses, the excuses, be careful of excuse after excuse, week after week.
• 30:43
  SPEAKER_00: Because excuses are like milk.
• 30:45
  SPEAKER_00: There is an expiration date.
• 30:48
  SPEAKER_00: But after a while, what happens?
• 30:50
  SPEAKER_00: It starts to smell.
• 30:55
  SPEAKER_00: So these excuses, when they start to smell, you need to just know close on.
• 31:01
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, some shoes on and run.
• 31:03
  SPEAKER_00: Close the door, close the door on that.
• 31:05
  SPEAKER_00: And then you know another thing love requires clarity.
• 31:10
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 31:10
  SPEAKER_00: You know, we're talking about stringing being strung along or stringing somebody along.
• 31:16
  SPEAKER_00: Know that love requires clarity.
• 31:20
  SPEAKER_00: Healthy love may have challenges, but it shouldn't leave you constantly wondering where you stand.
• 31:28
  SPEAKER_00: That's that's the string.
• 31:32
  SPEAKER_02: Just keep pulling on it.
• 31:33
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, and you're wondering, well, what you know, where where do I where do I stand in in all this?
• 31:38
  SPEAKER_00: Where do I fit in?
• 31:39
  SPEAKER_00: And if you have to ask the question, um there's your sign.
• 31:46
  SPEAKER_00: There's your sign.
• 31:47
  SPEAKER_00: If you have to wonder about where you stand, then you're standing in the wrong place.
• 31:52
  SPEAKER_02: And a lot of time people get caught up in that because their lives are busy, working, everything, you come home late, and you wait for that phone call, and it's hey babe, how you doing?
• 32:05
  SPEAKER_02: How was your and that just melts your heart because you think that person really cares about you?
• 32:10
  SPEAKER_02: But you barely see each other.
• 32:12
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 32:13
  SPEAKER_02: That that's no different than than uh uh catfishing.
• 32:18
  SPEAKER_02: Right, right.
• 32:18
  SPEAKER_02: You've actually met them.
• 32:20
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 32:21
  SPEAKER_00: And it and again, if it isn't clear on on where you stand, if you have to wonder, because can confusion isn't romance.
• 32:29
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 32:30
  SPEAKER_00: Communication is if if if you can't com communicate on from the beginning on what you both want, and it just leads into confusion, then that's not romance.
• 32:44
  SPEAKER_02: We're not saying from the get-go, you should be saying, okay, well, I want to be married in three weeks.
• 32:49
  SPEAKER_02: Can you do it?
• 32:49
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 32:50
  SPEAKER_02: Or your or your first date.
• 32:52
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 32:52
  SPEAKER_02: Uh are we exclusive?
• 32:54
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 32:55
  SPEAKER_02: Are you ready?
• 32:56
  SPEAKER_02: I want to be pregnant.
• 32:57
  SPEAKER_02: No, that's not what we're talking about.
• 32:59
  SPEAKER_02: We're talking about over a few weeks, getting to know that person.
• 33:03
  SPEAKER_02: And after a month, you should be saying, maybe two months, you should be saying, uh, you know, when you're ready, you should be saying, Well, you know, we've been seeing each other for a for a little while now.
• 33:15
  SPEAKER_02: Um, where do you see this going?
• 33:17
  SPEAKER_02: And if they say, Well, you know what, we'll just see where it goes.
• 33:21
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 33:22
  SPEAKER_02: Now that's when you have to make that decision.
• 33:25
  SPEAKER_02: Do I want to see where it goes or do I want to know what's happening?
• 33:29
  SPEAKER_02: Right, right.
• 33:29
  SPEAKER_02: Because if you're 45, you really want to wait and see where it goes.
• 33:34
  SPEAKER_02: You know?
• 33:35
  SPEAKER_02: Maybe if you're 25, maybe you have the time to think about it.
• 33:39
  SPEAKER_02: Right, right.
• 33:41
  SPEAKER_02: Your time is important.
• 33:42
  SPEAKER_02: Your time has value.
• 33:44
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 33:44
  SPEAKER_00: And if you're looking for some s for a serious relationship, then you'll know after uh at least by three months where the communic the communication should have started about being exclusive.
• 34:00
  SPEAKER_00: And and this is uh that it it's a serious and serious relationship.
• 34:07
  SPEAKER_00: Well, here's the thing.
• 34:09
  SPEAKER_02: If you went into your job and you said to your boss, hey boss, I'd like a pay raise, and your boss says, Well, yeah, let's see where it goes.
• 34:16
  SPEAKER_02: You know, well are you gonna stand there and say, Okay, let's see where it goes?
• 34:21
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 34:22
  SPEAKER_02: You're gonna say, Okay, so what do you mean by that?
• 34:26
  SPEAKER_02: Well, let's just see where it goes.
• 34:28
  SPEAKER_02: Well, then you're gonna be out the office and you're gonna be on your phone, you're gonna be looking for a new job.
• 34:34
  SPEAKER_01: Well, yeah.
• 34:35
  SPEAKER_02: Or you're gonna press the matter.
• 34:38
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 34:39
  SPEAKER_02: But you're not gonna sell for, well, let's see where it goes.
• 34:41
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 34:42
  SPEAKER_00: After a a a time period that should be should have determined where you guys are are headed.
• 34:49
  SPEAKER_00: Because a healthy relationship shouldn't feel like trying to simple IKEA furniture with half the instructions.
• 34:57
  SPEAKER_00: You know, this is not a healthy relationship when you know when you're I'm sorry.
• 35:07
  SPEAKER_00: Well because a healthy relationship, you you you know it's it's no question.
• 35:13
  SPEAKER_00: There's nothing missing.
• 35:15
  SPEAKER_00: You have all the you have the instructions, you have the directions, you have you have um grounded evidence of and conversation of where this is going, of where the relationship is going.
• 35:30
  SPEAKER_02: So if your relationship hasn't come with IK's directions, yeah.
• 35:36
  SPEAKER_00: If if it comes with half the directions, then uh it it it's not a fit.
• 35:40
  SPEAKER_00: There you go.
• 35:41
  SPEAKER_00: It it it will not turn out right.
• 35:45
  SPEAKER_00: All right.
• 35:45
  SPEAKER_00: Here's some questions to ask yourself.
• 35:48
  SPEAKER_00: Am I waiting for words or looking for actions?
• 35:51
  SPEAKER_00: It's another question.
• 35:52
  SPEAKER_00: Am I in love with reality or possibility?
• 35:57
  SPEAKER_00: Here's another.
• 35:58
  SPEAKER_00: If nothing changed in the next year, would I stay?
• 36:02
  SPEAKER_00: Last one.
• 36:04
  SPEAKER_00: Am I choosing the this relationship or just afraid to let go?
• 36:09
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 36:09
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 36:10
  SPEAKER_00: These are these are all questions you should ask so you don't get strung along and so you don't string somebody else along.
• 36:17
  SPEAKER_00: Now, in closing, here's the truth.
• 36:20
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes people string us along, but sometimes we tie the string around our own hearts and refuse to let go.
• 36:28
  SPEAKER_00: Love isn't supposed to feel like chasing a bus that's already left the station.
• 36:35
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 36:36
  SPEAKER_00: But I like the part that sometimes we we tie the string around our own hearts and we refuse to let go.
• 36:45
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 36:46
  SPEAKER_02: Because of possibilities.
• 36:48
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 36:49
  SPEAKER_00: The right relationship may not always be easy, but it shouldn't require detective work.
• 36:56
  SPEAKER_02: Do you remember the movie with Queen Latifa?
• 37:00
  SPEAKER_02: She thought she was dying.
• 37:02
  SPEAKER_02: And she had a book of possibilities.
• 37:04
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 37:05
  SPEAKER_02: An awesome movie.
• 37:06
  SPEAKER_02: That was a book of possibilities.
• 37:09
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 37:09
  SPEAKER_00: That I love that.
• 37:10
  SPEAKER_00: Now I'm not one to watch a movie over and over and over.
• 37:14
  SPEAKER_00: Once I've watched it one time, but this movie, oh my goodness, love it.
• 37:19
  SPEAKER_02: But you don't create a book of possibilities and create this story for yourself.
• 37:25
  SPEAKER_02: Look at what's in front of you.
• 37:27
  SPEAKER_00: Right, exactly.
• 37:28
  SPEAKER_02: Look at the actions that are being taken.
• 37:29
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, especially when it comes to relationships.
• 37:33
  SPEAKER_00: And if you're I think we touched a bit on this, but I have to reiterate this.
• 37:37
  SPEAKER_00: If you're constantly asking, do they really want me?
• 37:41
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe the better question is, why am I settling for someone who makes me ask?
• 37:48
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 37:49
  SPEAKER_00: Why am I settling for someone who makes me ask?
• 37:53
  SPEAKER_00: Do they really want me?
• 37:55
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 37:56
  SPEAKER_00: Because the healthiest love doesn't leave you guessing, it leaves you growing.
• 38:01
  SPEAKER_00: You got that, Professor?
• 38:02
  SPEAKER_00: I got it.
• 38:03
  SPEAKER_02: I like it.
• 38:03
  SPEAKER_00: A healthiest relationship doesn't leave you guessing, it leaves you growing.
• 38:09
  SPEAKER_00: And finally, remember, if you're the only one rowing the relationship boat, you're not on a romantic cruise.
• 38:19
  SPEAKER_00: You're just paddling in circles.
• 38:21
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 38:23
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 38:24
  SPEAKER_00: On that note.
• 38:26
  SPEAKER_00: Well last words before we close.
• 38:30
  SPEAKER_02: So, listeners, you know, our website, you can get free 30 minutes.
• 38:37
  SPEAKER_02: Doesn't cost you anything.
• 38:39
  SPEAKER_02: You can just shoot us a message, we'll set up a time, and we'll get with you.
• 38:44
  SPEAKER_02: We have listeners all over, you name it, Africa, Italy.
• 38:48
  SPEAKER_02: We have listen listeners all over the place.
• 38:51
  SPEAKER_02: Um Southeast Asia.
• 38:53
  SPEAKER_02: Southeast Asia, you name it.
• 38:55
  SPEAKER_02: So I want to put this out there because I have had a couple people message me.
• 39:00
  SPEAKER_02: The pricing is per your country.
• 39:04
  SPEAKER_02: So our current pricing is US, but if you are in a different country, contact us so we can give you what the pricing would be for your country.
• 39:14
  SPEAKER_00: Exactly.
• 39:14
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that yeah.
• 39:16
  SPEAKER_02: So that pricing is for US, but if you have if you're somewhere in Kenya or Italy or whatever, we'll give you the pricing for your country.
• 39:27
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 39:28
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, that's that's we we base it on the currency for your country.
• 39:33
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 39:33
  SPEAKER_02: We don't convert, because that's not fair.
• 39:36
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 39:37
  SPEAKER_02: So we base it on the currency for your country.
• 39:40
  SPEAKER_02: So I want to make that clear because I've had a few quotes about that.
• 39:44
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, well, that that's good.
• 39:45
  SPEAKER_00: That's good to bring that up.
• 39:47
  SPEAKER_00: And now we want to thank each and every one of you for being here and thank you for allowing us to be part of your journey.
• 39:55
  SPEAKER_00: And if this episode resonated with you, please like, follow, and download.
• 40:02
  SPEAKER_00: Also share it with someone who may benefit from this podcast.
• 40:06
  SPEAKER_00: And you can always find us at relationshipcoachinggroup.com, whereas Professor just said, you can email us if you have any questions or comments or just want to learn about the services we offer.
• 40:20
  SPEAKER_00: So until the next time, take care of yourselves and remember, healthy relationships are not built on fear or control, but from a place of understanding, trust, respect, and intentional choices.
• 40:36
  SPEAKER_00: And remember, you're not alone.
• 40:39
  SPEAKER_00: Together, we got this.
• 40:41
  SPEAKER_02: We got you.