Latest / Natty Unfiltered / Removing Limiting Beliefs + Finding What You’re Good At
Transcript
- 0:00Foreign. Welcome to Nettie Unfiltered,
- 0:05the podcast for moms who love their kids, but know they
- 0:09were meant for more. I'm Natty, a mom of three, real estate
- 0:13agent and online entrepreneur. And this is where we talk
- 0:17confidence, mindset, money, and building a life that
- 0:20actually feels like yours. Today, I want to
- 0:24talk about something that quietly controls so much of your life.
- 0:29Your limiting beliefs and how to
- 0:33actually figure out what you're good at.
- 0:37Most of your beliefs aren't even yours.
- 0:40So before we even get into what's holding you back, I want you to think
- 0:45about this. A lot of the things you believe about yourself
- 0:48didn't actually start with you. They came from
- 0:52things you heard growing up. What your parents
- 0:55had, teachers, society, even just watching how
- 1:00other people lived. Things like be realistic.
- 1:04That's not stable. You should play it safe.
- 1:08People like us don't do that. And over
- 1:12time, you don't even question it anymore. It just becomes your truth.
- 1:17But here's the thing. Just because you've believed something
- 1:21for a long time does not make it true.
- 1:25It just make it familiar. And sometimes we stay stuck
- 1:29in familiar, even when it's limiting us.
- 1:32I know that I had to work on
- 1:36my limiting beliefs. My fear of failure
- 1:40because of my childhood,
- 1:44because I did not believe in myself, because I did not have
- 1:48that encouragement. There's so many things that just
- 1:53prevented me from going after things without any
- 1:57fear. But good thing that at some point I realized
- 2:01that and I needed to work on it because I wanted to
- 2:06succeed in life. I wanted more than I
- 2:10was doing. And so limiting beliefs sound like
- 2:14facts, but they're actually not. This is where it gets tricky,
- 2:18because limiting beliefs don't sound like fears,
- 2:22they sound like facts. I'm not good in
- 2:26the camera, not business minded. I don't have time.
- 2:30I'm not that type of person. I'm not intelligent
- 2:35enough. I. I'm not beautiful enough. So on and on.
- 2:39It feels real, it feels logical. It feels like this
- 2:44is just who I am. But what if just a
- 2:48story you've repeated so many times, you stop questioning
- 2:52it? Because think about it. Were you born thinking
- 2:56you. You're bad on camera? No. Were you
- 3:00born believing you can make money? No. Those beliefs were
- 3:04learned, which means they can be unlearned.
- 3:09And I'm not saying it happens overnight, but the first step
- 3:13is catching yourself when you say those things.
- 3:16So instead of I'm not good at this, shift it to I'm
- 3:21not good at this. Yet that one
- 3:25word changes everything. It's all about changing
- 3:30Your mindset, how you approach things, how you approach your thoughts
- 3:34when they get into your head. Do you always look at things from
- 3:39the negative standpoint or when you catch yourself thinking
- 3:43negatively, you flip that switch in your head,
- 3:47in your mind and you start thinking positively.
- 3:52And that's something that you have to put in the work and
- 3:56which is going to be paying off. And I know this because
- 4:01I went through it, I've done the work and
- 4:05I continue to do the work because I want
- 4:09always to be a different outcome. I don't want
- 4:12to be dwelling on things, I don't want to be dwelling on the things from
- 4:16the past and looking at myself and preventing myself
- 4:20from being successful. Being able to
- 4:24have that financial freedom, being able to have the doors open
- 4:28up, you know, to me because I'm living,
- 4:32limiting myself and second guessing myself and questioning
- 4:37myself. You don't find your thing,
- 4:40you built it. I think this is one of the biggest misconceptions,
- 4:44especially online. We see people who are successful,
- 4:48confident, doing their thing and it looks like they just,
- 4:52just found their purpose. Like one day they woke
- 4:56up and were like, this is it. That's not how it
- 5:00works. Nobody starts out great in anything.
- 5:04They try something, they're not amazing at it,
- 5:07they keep going, they get better.
- 5:11And somewhere in that process they realize, okay, I actually
- 5:16enjoy this or I'm getting good at this. And I
- 5:20tell you that I've seen number of moms who start
- 5:24on social media doing this kind of one niche
- 5:28and I think it was more aligned with like fashion and
- 5:32they were growing and everything, but once
- 5:36they switch their kind of like
- 5:40niche, they actually found their calling.
- 5:45They just started blowing up on social media and business
- 5:49and getting deals with brands because
- 5:53they really aligned with what they felt.
- 5:56Passionate. And I like, I have a couple of moms who they both
- 6:00went to different directions and they've
- 6:05been doing so well and so many moms can relate
- 6:09to them. And yes, there's still those haters
- 6:13there who always have to put a common negative
- 6:16comment or something hateful, which I don't understand.
- 6:19Like they forget about this saying,
- 6:23if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all.
- 6:27Why? What gives you pleasure of putting something negative
- 6:31and putting somebody else down? To me, that's something wrong
- 6:36with you and you have to look within yourself of why
- 6:40are you doing it? Because there's another person on
- 6:44that screen who's going to read that comment. So would
- 6:49you like somebody else to give you that comment?
- 6:52Probably not. So why are you doing it? Somebody else
- 6:56so that's something that's just. I could never
- 7:00understand. Your thing is built through
- 7:04repetition. It's built through trying things that don't
- 7:08work, through moments where you feel unsure, through figuring it out
- 7:13as you go. So if you're sitting there thinking, I just
- 7:17don't know what I'm good at, it's not because you don't have something.
- 7:21It's because you have not given yourself enough chances
- 7:25to discover it. And it's okay for you to start with one thing
- 7:29and then make a shift. And you can make probably a couple of shifts
- 7:33until you find your calling, until you find something that
- 7:37just clicks. I know. For me, it also took me some time to actually
- 7:40really figure out, okay, what is it that I
- 7:44want to concentrate? Because I do love a lot of different things. I love
- 7:49fashion, love cooking, I love motivational. There's so many things that I
- 7:53love. But it took me some time to figure
- 7:58out and find what actually was giving me
- 8:02real joy. Something that I wanted other moms,
- 8:06other women to experience, something that I wanted
- 8:10to share through my life. Experiences that
- 8:14I've learned and I continue to learn. And you
- 8:18will figure that out too. So you don't have to worry about, like,
- 8:22oh, I have to pick something and just stick with it. Because you change.
- 8:26Like, you change as a person.
- 8:29Your messaging is going to change, and that's totally
- 8:34fine. Stop comparing your beginning to someone else's middle.
- 8:39This one, I see it all the time. You try something
- 8:43new and within minutes you're already comparing yourself
- 8:47to someone who's been doing it for years. And you can think about like,
- 8:51oh, she's confident, she's so good at this. I could never do
- 8:55that. And it shuts you down because you even give yourself
- 9:00a chance. But what you're seeing is not where
- 9:04they started, it's where they are now. You didn't see the awkward
- 9:08videos, the uncertainty, the trial and errors, the all the comparisons
- 9:13themselves starting out from zero, the judgment.
- 9:17You comparing your first step to someone else's like,
- 9:21like a hundred step. And that will always make you
- 9:25feel behind. Instead, compare yourself to who you
- 9:29were yesterday. That's the only comparison that actually matters.
- 9:33And I know it's hard. I know that you get
- 9:37on social media, doesn't matter what platform, and when
- 9:41you start scrolling and you seeing the success and you seeing the comments
- 9:44and you seeing the likes and the views, you can't
- 9:48help but feel insecure. And you start judging yourself because
- 9:53you're not there. And yes, they started
- 9:57from where you are now. So if you look
- 10:01at yourself and say, hey, I'm further along than I was
- 10:05yesterday, a month ago, two months ago. You have to give
- 10:08yourself a clap because you started, and you continue
- 10:13pursuing what you started.
- 10:17So what actually, naturally, what comes naturally to you
- 10:21is your clue. Here's something I want you to really
- 10:24think about. What comes easy to you that
- 10:29other people struggle with? Because a lot of times we overlook
- 10:33our strength because they feel normal to us. Like, if you're a great
- 10:37cook and it comes natural to you, come up with recipes,
- 10:42anything. Like, you cook, it's good, you just whip things out.
- 10:46And for somebody else, it could be daunting.
- 10:49They're like, no, I rather order it, have takeouts,
- 10:53maybe order food service, that the food just comes.
- 10:57All I need to do is reheat. I cannot do what she's
- 11:00doing. So you take your strengths for granted without
- 11:04realizing that, hey, there is a whole
- 11:08lot of people, a whole lot of women, moms, who actually will
- 11:12benefit from what you can share, which you think that,
- 11:16oh, this is nothing. This is just like a normal thing that I do on
- 11:19a daily basis. And you might think,
- 11:24oh, that's nothing. You know, anyone can do it, but not
- 11:29everyone can. Maybe you're, you know, like, also naturally
- 11:33connecting with other people. Maybe you explain things in a simple way.
- 11:37Maybe you have an eye for style, like organization,
- 11:41business. I mean, whatever it is, those things
- 11:45matter. And instead of chasing what looks trendy or what
- 11:50everyone else is doing, lean into what feels natural
- 11:53to you. That's where your confidence grows faster,
- 11:57because you're not forcing it. You're doing it because
- 12:02you've been doing it all, all along. You don't need to
- 12:06have it all figured out to start. I think we put so much pressure on
- 12:10ourselves to have this clear path. Like, I need to know exactly what I'm
- 12:14doing. I need to know this will work. I need to know where this
- 12:18is going. I need to know what camera to use. I need to know what
- 12:22angles. I need to know how to edit the videos and
- 12:26on. And that pressure keeps you stuck. Because the
- 12:30truth is, clarity comes from action, not from sitting
- 12:34there thinking about it. You figure things out as you go.
- 12:38You adjust, you pivot, you learn. But you
- 12:42can't do any of that if you just never start.
- 12:46And you are allowed to evolve. And one
- 12:50more thing that I think a lot of moms need to hear,
- 12:54you allowed to change. As I've mentioned before,
- 12:58I'm sure you're not the same person as you are teenager, not the
- 13:01same person. You are in 20s or 30s, you continue
- 13:05to evolve and change and your content
- 13:10can do the same. You allowed to
- 13:14try something and then decide it's not for you.
- 13:16You're allowed to grow into different version of yourself.
- 13:21Just because you've always been one way does not mean
- 13:25you have to stay that way. And just because something worked for you before doesn't
- 13:30mean it's what you want now. So you need to give yourself
- 13:34permission to explore that, because that's how you actually get closer
- 13:38to who you were meant to be. So if you're sitting there
- 13:42feeling like I don't know what I'm good at or maybe this
- 13:46is just isn't for me, I want you to challenge that.
- 13:50Start questioning the beliefs you've been carrying.
- 13:54Start trying things without needing them to be perfect.
- 13:58Because you're not stuck. You've just been operating from old
- 14:02stories. And if this episode spoke to you,
- 14:06send it to another mom, another woman who needs to hear this.
- 14:10And don't forget to follow and subscribe to Nadi Unfiltered
- 14:14because we're breaking through those limiting beliefs
- 14:18together. Until next time.