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Remembering Their Mother · Let's Ask the Mamas!

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  This is now the time of the show when we normally ask our American mama
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  is a question? Today we have a sad announcement to make Terry and Kimberly's
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  mother passed away this week, and this is the first time we've actually had
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  an opportunity to welcome back to the show and talk about her passing. So
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  we're going to talk with our American mamas Alma Mama and joining us now our
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  American mama's Terry, Netteville and Kimberly bur Listen. This is not something that
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  we've we've talked about or told the audience about on air, but y'all did
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  lose your mom in the last week or so, and this was a very
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  rapid illness or very rapid decline. And our condolence is obviously Lewis and I
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  and the whole show thank you. But it's great having you back in studio.
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  Yes, and well, I'll just start off this. We love y'all,
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  and y'all mean the world to us. Thank you, thank you.
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  We have felt the love, haven't we. Oh my gosh, it felt
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  the love. It's true. Our mom, seventy five years old, played
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  pickleball every morning, She danced every night, just about healthy as could be.
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  A month ago she was diagnosed, officially diagnosed. In two weeks,
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  she was still going to games of our kids. And then the last two
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  weeks it was just a rapid it was malignant, and they said it was
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  just an aggressive form of cancer. So we said goodbye to our beloved mom.
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  The beauty of it is that we were able to there's she and dad
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  had four of us, four kids, all four of us were able to
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  be around her hospital bed the entire week, twenty four hours a day,
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  you know, making her comfortable and doing all the things that we could do
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  and telling her how much we love her and what it has meant to us
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  to have her as our matriarch, Our brother in law's you know, Kimberly's
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  husband came in, and Lindsay's husband came in, every every kid, every
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  kid, every grandkid. And Kevin called at one point and said, is
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  your mom where I can talk to her? I said, she is,
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  so I put the phone up next to her ear and he told her and
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  she could barely respond, but she knew everybody. And then those who were
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  far away, like Steal and Tristan who were about to have who were at
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  the time about to have a baby. They were able to tell her how
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  much a lover slave was getting on a bus from a baseball game and he
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  called and they were every grandkid was able to give her that gift and to
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  receive the gift of her love right back. It was incredible. You know.
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  I saw something recently and it really resonated to me. And it was
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  a lady in an audience talking to like a spiritual guru. She was crying
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  and she had lost her mom like three months previously, and she said,
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  I got all of my spiritual knowledge from my mom, and now I'm so
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  lost and I don't know what to do. And I understood that feeling,
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  and I felt that feeling. And he said to her that, of course
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  it's the first relationship that you have the strongest. But are you going to
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  remember your mother and it be a cause of pain or are you going to
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  remember her and it be a source of joy, Because it's a choice.
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  And so in our family, well go back over that. It's a choice.
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  It's a choice to remember the person you love with pain or it's a
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  choice to remember them with joy. And so we are choosing to remember her
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  with joy. As painful as it is, that's how we have to remember
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  her in order to move forward. Now, I would I would imagine that's
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  a little easier to do given how much joy y'all actually had with her,
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  how much of your life I mean, and your dad as well, Absolutely,
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  I mean how much joy. I guess that's a little bit easier than
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  if you you know, if there's some people who've lost their mom and they
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  had a very that was a very challenging relationship, and it's harder to find
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  that joy that. I had a friend come over the other day, one
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  of my best friends from college actually, and she loved mom. Everybody loved
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  our mom. She is the most Christlike of anybody that we know. But
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  my friend said she had emotional and she said, what you have right now?
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  This feeling, she said, I'm envious of because you know how contentious
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  my relationship is with a mother, And I don't know how I would handle
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  this at this point. I never realized that not everybody has that, Not
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  everybody gets to have this relationship with their mother the way that we did.
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  She was the wise when she was incredibly We remember we talked about that with
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  mom, you know, just a couple of weeks ago before she died,
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  we talked about her family and we were talking about how blessed we are and
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  how lucky we just love each other and support each other. And she said,
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  we work at it. It didn't come. It's just not something that's
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  just easy. We work at it as a family. We show up when
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  it's not the easiest times, or it's hard to drive that many hours to
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  be at a game, but we show up and we work at it.
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  And I think that's what makes a good family successful. And you just kind
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  of make a pact. You know, there's families that the things happen,
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  you say, well, I'm not I don't I'm never going to talk to
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  them again. Happen. It happened in my husband's family with his own father,
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  you know, letting go of people just because they were angry at the
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  time, and then you lose so much. The loss which you're giving up
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  is extraordinarily sad and sorrowful, and so in our family, we might get
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  mad or whatever, but we're gonna still show up, we're gonna come back,
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  we're gonna make it right. And that's because we had parents that may
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  us do that even when we were kids, and I'll tell you, y'all
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  do that more than anybody else. I know. Y'all just show up more
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  than I am not. There is not a single part of me that is
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  surprised that all four of y'all were there all week long. That I would
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  have been shocked had it been any other way, because that's just what y'all
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  do. I'll tell you the other thing that I've got to share because it's
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  so funny, is our family. Humor is our calling card. Even in
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  the saddest times. We humor is what helps us through grief, through process
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  anything. But Mom would she would wake up from a deep sleep of hours
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  and she'd be like, why am I still here? And she was ready
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  to go. And then she said, at one point, you know,
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  Jason, our brother, was just we all kind of feel back in our
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  roles as kids, and she said, Lord, take me. And I
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  said, Mom, tell him to take Jason too, he's so annoying.
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  And she just laughed with a little bit of alms of energy, and I
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  thought, thank God, all four of us could use that humor to get
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  through that week of grieving for what we knew was about to happen. If
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  you like to ask our American Mama's a question, go to our website American
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  ground Ready dot com, slash mama's and click on the ask the Mama's button.
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  Terry Netteville kiberly bre listening to. Love you all very much and thank
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  you for being a part of this. Thank you