Latest / Daisy’s mini rants / Ending self doubt with Steve Barton
Transcript
- Steve Barton: I'm Steve Barton. I'm trying to figure things out. So I'm on the f I'm on the call with Daisy. We're gonna rant and and we're gonna have fun. I live in I live in Portland, Maine, which is about two hours north of Boston, Massachusetts, and I am coaching people who want to really become the absolute powerhouses that I know they can be. So that's what I do. And that's what I love to do and I have fun doing it. And I'm looking to rant with you. Daisy: Thank you so much. Okay. as you already know, I'm Daisy. I am a multidisciplinary creative. So I mean to photography. I do videography, content creation as well and creative direction. And recently I decided to, you know, just put some of my thoughts out there. Because I notice I I speak a lot and mostly to myself and I'm like, you know what? Maybe some of this could actually like change someone's life. So I decided to start Daisy's mini rats. So here we are. All right. So Steve Barton: I love it. Let's expand it. Let's expand it and make that make that max maxi rance. Daisy: So I saw your game of ten and Steve Barton: Mm-hmm. Daisy: I wanted to I wanted to ask So what is the game of ten and how does it help high achievers break free from self doubt, fear and guilt? Steve Barton: yeah. Well you don't have any of that, do you, Daisy? No, you have no fear, no self doubt, no guilt, no shame, do zero. Yeah. Okay. I know, I know you don't. You got it Daisy: No, I do not. Steve Barton: all figured out. someone said to me the other day, You got it all figured out, Steve, don't you? I said, No. I'm still figuring it out. Having fun along the way. So the game of ten's all about being we're all appointed ten at birth. Okay? Appointed. And then as we come out of the womb, life happens. And we have Daisy: Yeah. Steve Barton: parents, we have caregivers and we take on the generational traumas of our parents and our grandparents and society. And we have this wonderful child, this hurt child, this inner child that was raised with love, but sometimes that love. is based on fear, self-doubt, guilt, and shame. Okay? And we take it on and then spend the rest of our lives figuring out how to let it go. Okay? So I call that the game often played, one through nine. four elements in this game. fear one through nine, self-doubt one through nine, guilt one through nine. Shame one through nine. Guilt is I did something bad, they did something bad, something bad happened. Get guilt. Shame is I am bad. It's personal. Okay? That's how you figure it out. So in that game, that is the matrix that most people live in. because you can't get out of it the way we've been conditioned to think. You can get to nine, very little f fear, very little. Very little self-doubt. Nine. Very little guilt. Nine. Very little shame. Nine. But ten percent gap. 'Cause you can get to nine on all levels by positive thinking. But you can't get to ten by thinking at all. That's where people just go. Mind explodes. What happens if I don't think? Would you rather think or would you rather know? I'd rather know. Would you rather believe or would you rather know? I'd rather know. There we go. With the game of ten, you go into a state of awareness, no thought. You observe your thoughts. You have But typically the average person has sixty thousand thoughts going through their head a day. Eighty percent are from the past. You've heard these figures probably. Cleveland Clinic did a study years ago. 80% are negative. So you get 48,000 negative thoughts, 48,000 old thoughts, and most people are running their program and living their life from old negative conditioning. Limiting. Every thought is limiting. be from from awareness because if awareness is infinite. So you can think about a piece of it, but you can never think about the whole thing. And this is what the mind wants to do is grab a piece of it and then believe it, tie it with a bow and say this is the way it is. And no Daisy: Yeah, for real. Steve Barton: it isn't. No it isn't. Daisy knows it. Daisy no it ain't. No it ain't Daisy: Yeah. Steve Barton: So every belief is limiting, every thought is limiting. So when you're aware that we are not our thoughts, we have thoughts. Their thoughts are wonderful. Use them from the space of infinite awareness. When we're in that space of infinite awareness and play the game. We're gonna play the game, Daisy. You can't get away from the without playing the game with me, so we're gonna play. We're gonna play. Okay. So so Daisy: Okay. Sure. Steve Barton: When we quiet the mind, and I've created affirmation meditation, that people can quiet their mind in fifteen seconds. And when you quiet your mind, you're in your flow, you're in your connected to who we are, divine source energy, an aspect of it, part of it. We ain't it, but we're part of it, okay? And but we are our own source. And if we stay in that ten. It's we have free will and we k everything's free. Doesn't happen when we ask for it. Doesn't happen the time or how, but it happens a hundred percent. You get at ten you get everything you ask for. Never happens the way you think it's gonna happen, never happens the way you it sometimes it does, but rarely. But we have to let go of control to be in that control. That is control. That is power. Okay? We are the power, we are the control, we are the profit. Okay. Most people look at businesses, I want power, I want control, we need to make a profit, okay? And I like to say we are the shiny object that everyone chases. Don't chase. It comes to you when you don't chase it. So it's our job is to expand that awareness of who we are, but we have to let go of those limiting thoughts, those disappointing thoughts, those thoughts of trauma, those thoughts of doesn't mean it didn't happen. It just no longer have to keep us at that low level of awareness. I rest my case, Daisy. That was my rant. Daisy: That was a very beautiful rant. Thank you very much. Steve Barton: Thank you. Daisy: well I know you said sometimes you have to just let go and that's real power. But there are people out there that don't really know how to let go and they're really obsessed with being in control. So how how would you say they go about that? Because I don't think it's just easy to just Steve Barton: It Daisy: See like Steve Barton: it is not easy and you're right. It it appears not to be easy, but when you practice it, it is. Okay? So let's start with the six phrases that quiet the mind, okay? And then I'll give you the audience a tool and you a tool on how to let go, okay? Because if you don't let go, it's harder to hold that down than let it go. And that's where the shift happens. You think think it's easier to not let go. It's easier to let go. And once you've developed that mindset of letting go, it's it's it's paradoxical because you're dealing with everything's a paradox until it becomes intuitive. love thy neighbor, love thy enemy, right? Paradoxical. Why would you love your enemy? So they don't control you in your mind, right? So everything's a paradox that is intuitive until you got ten where it is intuitive. Letting go is easier than holding on. Daisy: Very true. Steve Barton: I know. Daisy: Okay, Steve Barton: Alright, let's do let's play the six phrases. Alright. Daisy: Okay. Steve Barton: Repeat after me. I am ten. Daisy: I am then. Steve Barton: Yeah, you're saying you're a divine aspect of the divine, so let's have a little more enthusiasm, Daisy. I'm ten. Daisy: I'm ten. Steve Barton: I'm doing the best that I can with the awareness that I have. Daisy: I'm doing the best I can with the very least that I have. Steve Barton: I always write with the awareness that I have. Daisy: What? Can you come again? Steve Barton: I'm always right with the awareness that I have. Daisy: I'm always right with the awareness that I have. Steve Barton: I am enough. Daisy: I am enough. Steve Barton: I do enough. Daisy: I do enough. Steve Barton: I have enough. Daisy: I have enough. That's very refreshing. Steve Barton: Isn't it? It clear it is great word refreshing because it clears your mind. You've just cleared your mind. You've answered all the questions that our incessant mind just that rant, that Daisy: Mm-hmm. Very true. Steve Barton: rant that we have going on our head day in, day out. It just like did you do this? Did you call that? Okay, so that is awareness. You're in a state, so by practicing this. you extend your awareness and you keep your mind quiet more often. We get addicted to thinking, okay? Think of yourself, okay, now I'm gonna ask you to think. Remember being a little girl? Daisy, what were you thinking? You did that? You did what? You said that? my God. What did you do? my god. We're in the middle of panic. We're we're we can't fight, we can't f run, can't flight, so we freeze. And then we then we get conditioned to think our way out of problems. that were caused by thinking in the first place. Daisy: Ha ha ha. Steve Barton: So you there are no problems. The only problem we think we have many problems. The only problem is when we separate from ten, source energy, God, whatever you want to call it. With that is the problem. And we have free will in this space of awareness. And when we leave it, it comes at a fee will. F-E-E will. Very costly to our emotional being, our physical being, our relationship, our whatever we do, it's you're paying a f a heavy fee. When it gets to around ten per nine's very successful. But at six, forty percent, you know? It's our we have a golden cr I did a LinkedIn post this week that we all came were born with a golden credit card. And at ten interest rate free. You gotta pay it back. But you you 'cause you are responsible in business and whenever you borrow, you pay it back, but there's no interest in it. And but at nine, ten percent, hm, handle that. At six, forty percent credit card? You know, right now in real life, not metaphorical life, it's twenty seven percent. Are you kidding me? And they put they put the Loan sharks out of business. The bankers put the loan sharks out of business. You guys are Daisy: Sure. Steve Barton: even more ruthless than we were. So Yeah. So yeah. So the key is to really go into flow. and also when we do collapse, when we do say these phrases, it's an affirmation, it's a meditation, no thought, 15 seconds. When a client says to me, I didn't have time to do the phrases, you didn't have two and a half minutes a day. Daisy: That's that's surviv that's so real. Like I mean it's just Steve Barton: I know, I know. And so yeah, it's kinda like saying with people with anxiety, I don't know what's gonna happen next month. Well, when did you ever? Daisy: Yeah. Steve Barton: When you put it in those terms, what are is our mind doing to us? So therefore I say we are awareness. The mind is a separate it's not separate, but it's we have to separate it to be aware of what it is. mind, body, spirit. It's all one, right? You can't you Daisy: Mm. Steve Barton: can separate it to talk about it, but you've got to incorporate it into who we are, okay? Much like time space. Time is right now the present moment, always. It's always been the present moment. Power of Now, Eckhart Tolli. Great book. But what he doesn't talk about is the universal space. Time, space. We want to collapse it. You know what the universal quantity is, the universal space, the universal portion. I've had one person, I've had four people get the right answer out of a thousand people. I said yesterday it happened again. And I have con you said it three times. in that affirmation, that one word three times. Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun Daisy: That's crazy. Steve Barton: dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun Your answer Daisy? In the form of a question. Now is always Daisy: I don't remember Steve Barton: I know the mind does not want us to know who we are. It thinks it's real. Your mind that you created, Daisy: Why do you think so? Steve Barton: your it thinks it's real, it thinks it's your your identity, you it thinks you are your mind. You have a mind. I have a mind. I have a body. I have a thoughts. I have feelings. I have emotions. I have skills. I have talents. I have a big Daisy: Mm-hmm. Steve Barton: mouth. I can talk I can talk all day long. I have a great sense of humor. Daisy: Yeah, you do. Steve Barton: Which is our which is our seventh sense, okay? Our sixth sense is our common sense, the seventh sense is our sense of humor. Develop it, laugh, make fun with people. So now is always infinitely enough. Daisy: No is always infinitely enough. Steve Barton: No, infinite now is infinite enough. Whatever so you have to really do an this is this is my enough for now. It puts those three phrases put us in a space of state of grace and gratitude. That's why it felt so good. In the present moment, I'm grateful for everything I have, everything I am, everything I do, everything is just enough for now. All right. But also in that state of no thought, we are intentional. We are highly intentional beings. Okay. I know Daisy: Yeah. Steve Barton: you win you've gotten you are a high achiever, Davy. I know that from listening to your podcast that what you've been selected out of hundreds of people. They chose you because you are highly motivated and intentional, right? Daisy: Yeah. Steve Barton: get you nailed. I get I get you which is great. Meaning that you're intentional and intuitive. So you can only increase your intuition by letting go of the thoughts. Think of us as a beautiful specimen plant or flower in our garden. But then what comes in? Thoughts, weeds. That we don't weed. We don't maintain the garden. We don't maintain our space with boundaries. Okay? We to do the same thing with our mind and our body and our awareness and our thoughts. We have to maintain it. It's all one. But it gets out of some thoughts can get out of hand. And when they get out of hand, guess what's happened? We overthink. What happens when we overthink? We get overwhelmed. What happens when we get overwhelmed? We get anxiety and we get and we get and we get Daisy: With lots of thoughts in there. Steve Barton: depression because there are these eighty percent are negative. Can you imagine Daisy: Yeah. Steve Barton: having all these so we get we're like a French coffee press? my god, I got this pressure, pressure, pressure, pressure. And there's a little hole in the bottom of the f of the coffee press. And that spews out our that spews out that's Daisy: I'm sorry, can you give me a Steve Barton: okay. That pizza delivery? Daisy: no no no. I think I might need to change my look. Give me a second. Steve Barton: Yep. I'm gonna take a two minute break. I was a florist for thirty years. Daisy: Yeah, I saw that. Steve Barton: You have the prettiest daisy I ever saw. Daisy: Thank you. Steve Barton: I thought you left me. I thought she must think I'm crazy. No, you never leave me. You can't you can't quit you can't quit me. Daisy: no. No, Not at all. Okay, so I think I should go over some questions before our time is up. Steve Barton: Alright, so do you want me to finish up with a game of ten and then ask questions? It'd take me about a minute. Alright, let's do Daisy: Yes, Yeah. Steve Barton: that. Fin wrap it up. Go into awareness. Alright, 'cause when we collapse time space, as you know the infinite space now is enough. Always have enough. Time, money, patience, love. It's always enough. All right. So whenever you want to stack Daisy: Okay. Why do so many high achievers hit all their financial targets yet still feel empty or anxious on the inside? Steve Barton: Because they're playing the game often played one through nine. So let's say that typical high achievers work around six to nine. Or six to ten. High achievers, extremely high achievers, ten. They know they are who they are. They are their own authentic selves. They give zero gauches about anything, okay? I don't use the F word. I use the gosh word now. I love it. So much fun. The gosh word. Gosh. Daisy: I Steve Barton: So now when I hear someone who's polite, gosh, I'm just I tr Daisy: you Steve Barton: I translated to the F word. I love it. So them they're really operating from the imposter syndrome. That's what it's called. The gap between six and ten is imposter. They have fear, they have self-doubt, they have guilt, they have shame, but yet everyone thinks they're successful. They've achieved the highest level in the company, in the society, and this, and people think they're great, but inside they go, if they only knew what I think of myself. Think Daisy: you Steve Barton: of myself as less than. It's just as arrogant Daisy: It's in it. Steve Barton: to be less than as it is to be more than ten. Ten is who we are. It's our divine being in ourselves. And you think you're better than our divine being, you're arrogant. If you think you're less than that divine being, you're arrogant. Daisy: Why? Steve Barton: I know. Baboo. So so when we say those phrases, we're in present moment awareness. But what happens is we open up our conscious unconscious to consciousness. And then those phrases, those, you know, I'm date, I'm not good enough, I don't do enough, I don't have enough, I'm not right with the awareness I have, I'm not doing the best I can with aware. And I'm not ten, I'm six. Okay? So We have to l what do we do with these things? Most people s keep these suppressed, these thoughts about the traumas we had, the thoughts about the disappointments we had, the thoughts about and then we have an emotion attached to it, typically fear of self-doubt, guilt or shame. Okay? Or fear is the only false emotion. Love is the only true emotion. That's who we are. So when these thoughts about being less than ten come up. I have Marianne Williamson was my one of my coaches and she gave a great visualization of creating your daisy temple in your mind, okay? Create the goddess temple of who you are, of our own private temple in our mind, which is these called temples, right? The mind is a temple, okay? And treat treat it like one. And so in that temple have an altar. So anytime a thought that comes up that I'm not good enough, I don't do enough, I don't have enough, etc., take those thoughts. I take a bouquet of thoughts, because I was a florist, and I p a bouquet take a bouquet of daisy thoughts that are less than beautiful daisy, wonderful daisy. All those on the altar. And you and let them leave them there and if you're gonna say anything, say, I'm willing to see it differently and let it go. 'Cause you can't solve a problem at the level it was created. All right? At six or at three, a trauma, an abuse. A mental abuse, a physical abuse, a sexual abuse. It happened. Okay, it doesn't mean it didn't happen. It just means that it no longer, those thoughts about it no longer have control over me. I am the power, I am the control, I am the profit of myself. Okay? So Daisy: Yeah. Steve Barton: owning it in the way and those those are the weeds that we have to maintain to keep our garden. clear so that so the divine daisy plant can flourish and grow and expand. That is awareness. We are conscious awareness. So y you have to maintain it by letting go of all those thoughts. Doesn't mean it didn't happen. Doesn't mean you have to have that person place or situation back in your life. It means that it happened. I just don't have it controlling who I am right now. I'm not defining who I am right now. I'm not the victim of it anymore. I'm owning my power. I am c in control of myself, no one else. I am the prophet of myself. And if someone wants to get some words of wisdom they can ask me. I don't offer it for you know, right now I'm doing I do podcasts. So if you asked for it, you're gonna get it. It's my tr it's the truth I have learned to know to be true. And I'm al and I'm very willing to be wrong. Very I and I'm very willing not to know. And Daisy: That's a really good approach. I don't know how Steve Barton: Yeah. Daisy: you're answering most of my questions. Like before I won't ask them, like 21, and you're already answering them. Well, I'm Steve Barton: Yeah. Yeah. Daisy: going to ask this. How do you help analytical data-driven leaders tap into Steve Barton: Yeah. Daisy: intuition without making them feel like they're abandoning logic? Steve Barton: Right. because when you have this space of awareness, fundamental space of awareness that we're growing by letting go of limiting thoughts and limiting beliefs. Then because we are intentional intuitives, coming from that place of intention and intuition, guess what comes in? You set your big goal, you set your small goal, you set your medium-sized goal, you set your audacious dream that you've created in your mind of no thought. That's where imagination develops. That's where creativity develops. Whether you're photography, videography, you have these big idea that what if I took all the talent I have and created the most amazing documentary, the amazing story. Okay? That's something nobody's ever done before. Daisy: Yeah. Steve Barton: and if you told everyone what you're gonna do, they're gonna say you're crazy. Nobody's ever done that. Mm-hmm. Daisy: very very very valid until the court was under like wow how did you think about this how did you do this how did you you know Steve Barton: Yep. Alright, so there's where here's where logic comes in. A thought comes in from the space of no thoughts. A thought emerges. How am I going to ever pull this off? Okay? Here comes the thought. Boop. Not competing with 40,000 other thoughts in your head. Alright? And using these thoughts, because you're going from your right brain of creativity. crossing that corpus collossum bridge to the left brain, which is absolutely strategic, absolutely logical. That's the logical brain. The right brain is just totally like, my god, I'm out there and I'm loving it, okay? So you wanna take that imagination brain and put it into physical form. The goal. The audacious goal. Okay, let's talk about the big fat audacious goals that people would think you're crazy if you told them. And how am I gonna do this? Well, intuition is using intuition. A thought comes in. Well, I'm gonna take a course. Take a course. And what shows up on their your in social media feed? there's a d documentary course. thank you. Okay, so Daisy: Yeah. Steve Barton: Using your intuition and put it into logical. How are we gonna do it? I'm gonna take a course. I'm gonna get you know, learn as much as I can. And then it's just logical. You have to have it has to be based in our awareness, which is passion. We are love. You're love, I'm love. You can't get it from someplace else. You get it from being connected. That is pure consciousness and that is pure divine love. And you take that passion, get the thoughts that come in that you can manage. And they're it's logical, it's rational. It's guiding you on how do we implement this from non-physical to physical. To me that's common sense now. It's not common sense in the game often played. Okay? It's like, I gotta think. I gotta how am I gonna think my way through this? No, it doesn't Daisy: Yeah. Steve Barton: work. It doesn't work because it can get you you can get to nine on all levels by positive thinking. You can think your way to nine, but you can't get to ten by thinking at all. Daisy: Okay. Steve Barton: And in the game often played, there's six thousand five hundred and sixty-one options. Nine times nine times nine times nine. At the highest level. Can't get to ten by thinking at all. my God. All right. What happens if you don't think you have inner peace, you have joy, you have grace, you have gratitude. All right? And anytime those negative thoughts come up, boop, altar. Okay. Boop to the altar. Okay. Just boop You know. Einstein s is the one who said you can't solve a problem at the level it was created. Pretty brilliant guy, whether he said it or not. it's a brilliant Daisy: you Steve Barton: it it's energy. We're dealing with energy and low vibrational energies are fear, self doubt, guilt and shame. Very low energetic feelings. They're it's vibration. We're vibrational. We are body, mind, and spirit. if some of people come to me and say, when I'm healing my spirit, I say, honey, your spirit's fine. It's your mind, it's your mind that needs some it needs some developing. Let's do let's work with that and let's align Daisy: Thanks. Steve Barton: it with your perfection of who you are. All right. Because when you're dealing with your awareness, you're dealing from a place of perfection. Can't get there. You can't get to you you'll you can't get to be happy. There is no pursuit of happiness. You are happy. It's a place that you own. It's a place that you own and it's a place that you are entitled to happy, healthy, abundant, healed and whole. And that is your enough and you maintain that space. I got about ten minutes and I gotta go. But let's get some good question. Hopefully I answered all your questions and more. And hope hopefully you invite me back, Daisy. Daisy: Just one more. Just one more. So when we apply all of these principles that you've stated, what would you say your life and leadership would look like on the other side? Right. Steve Barton: maybe awesome. Maybe awesome. Maybe awesome. Daisy: Maybe, Boise, maybe. Steve Barton: I think no, maybe that was my joke. As I said, our si our Daisy: Okay. Steve Barton: six our sixth sense is our common sense. Our seventh s our seventh sense is our sense of humor. Play with life, play the game, learn the game, play it well, have fun, and just make fun with people. Don't make fun of people. Make fun with people. Make fun Daisy: with people. Steve Barton: with yourself. Don't make fun of yourself. Daisy: yourself you Steve Barton: Play, just play. We're here to recreate. We're here to recreate. Guess what we're here to recreate and recreate? Daisy: What? Steve Barton: Heaven on earth, honey. Heaven. Daisy: Thank Steve Barton: And this is it. This is it. Okay. We got one shot in this body. You know, maybe we come back. I don't know. There's lots I don't know, but there's lots I do know. And I know that we are here to to be ourselves. And I know that every thought that people have 80% from the past, 80% negative, I like to say, a hundred percent insane if it's not coming from awareness. So therefore, I don't care what people think of me. Daisy: That's a very honest way to live. That's a very peaceful way to live honestly. Steve Barton: When you don't you care, so I came up with a word I know I gotta go, but I came up I love collapsing time any duality. When in ten you're not duality, you're in infinity. Duality happens at nine to one. So there's a thing called when you deeply, deeply, deeply care and deeply, deeply, deeply don't give a gosh. Okay. And that's compassionate detachment. All right? You care about you very much care, but you have the wisdom to know that caring about something you have no responsibility about, no control over, no say over, that's insane. To worry about stuff outside of you that you have no control over. You have awareness of it, and if you're in the position of p of authority to do something about it. Do it, right? But if you don't, all you're gonna do is complain about it. So what do you wanna say to somebody who always complains? Shut the gosh up, right? Yeah. Yep. I love I love the gosh work now. I can say it and I can sound polite. The gosh word. Well you're amazing. Daisy: Yeah. Take those thoughts to the altar. Yeah, that's a good one. Thank you so much, Steve. I really appreciate your time. It's Steve Barton: Keep up your amazing Daisy: been really fun. Steve Barton: word. Yeah, I can't wait to see what you're gonna be doing playing the game of 10. for your Daisy: you Steve Barton: audience, for your audience, go to my website, www.stevebarton coaching, download the book that I wrote with my son, The Father of the Son, The Aha Moment. The Aha Moment, Marianne Williamson was one of my writing coaches, and I told her about this. Look up Mary Ann if you don't know who she is. Amazing Woman. And She goes, I love that name. Where'd you come up with that name? Did you see it somewhere? Did you download it? I download everything. Okay? Not from not from a computer, from my own computer. And she goes, I love that name. She's a f nine times f seven times New York Times bestseller, fourteen time author. Amazing woman, and ran for president the United States twice. traveled the world lecturing on Course in Miracles, Teachings of Common Sense Spirituality. So she's been one of my mentors since 1992. And she says, you know, Steve, the aha moment is the Holy Spirit. I said, figures. Figures. Can't get away from it. You can't get away from it. Don't tr don't try. Don't even try. Yeah. Well, thank you so Daisy: That was really amazing. Steve Barton: much for having me on your show. Daisy: Thank you. Steve Barton: Amazing things to you. Play the game of ten. Go to the altar when you feel less than ten. Daisy: All right, bye. Steve Barton: About I've Daisy: OHA.