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Free to Be You: Giver Gift · The Father's Business Podcast

• 0:03
  Speaker 1: The Father's Business was founded by Sylvia Gunter to encourage people to a deeper relationship with God.
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: I'm Elizabeth Gunter Powell.
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: And I am Kimberly Roddy.
• 0:12
  Speaker 2: Welcome to the Father's Business Podcast.
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: We are so glad that you've joined us.
• 0:16
  Speaker 2: Hi everyone, Welcome to our podcast.
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: Today we are jumping into the Giver Gift and we have joining us today on our podcast our dear friend Ashley.
• 0:26
  Speaker 2: She is someone that we have known for many years now and she is a key part of our leadership team.
• 0:31
  Speaker 2: Ashley is such a gift to us.
• 0:33
  Speaker 2: We enjoy her.
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: We think you'll really enjoy hearing from her today.
• 0:36
  Speaker 2: So not only is Ashley a giver gift, but I am a giver gift as well, and, as Elizabeth got to say on the week that we did the prophet gift, Elizabeth is among the best gifts.
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: Today, I'm surrounded she is surrounded by the giver gift, and so we look forward to today's conversation.
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: Absolutely.
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: I'm looking forward to interviewing the two of you and learning more about the giver gift, but, just as a recap, for those of you that haven't listened to the intro session that we did, where we described all seven of the gifts, when I think of the giver gift, the first thing I think about is flexibility and options.
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: They love to be spontaneous, they love not to be locked into precise schedules or time, and out of that beautiful flexibility and the option play, as I often call it, they are able to bring out of the box thinking.
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: They're able to draw people together in community.
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: They're able to give strategically, not necessarily just thinking financially, but about all the resources that we have to give, of their time to give, of their wisdom to give to and their heartbeat.
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: Behind all of that that I see in the two of them is they long for there to be a legacy piece.
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: They long for whatever they give of themselves, however that may be, for there to be a generational impact that will be long lasting.
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: They don't just give to give, and so this is probably the most unique gift, and I would say it was the one that took me the longest to understand, which is why I tried to misdiagnose my own friend and broke our rules because I didn't fully understand the beauty of the giver gift at the time that I was trying to convince her that she was another one, and so I am so excited about getting to talk to both Ashley and Kimberly today to hear more about their Giver Gift.
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: What do you love about your Giver Gift?
• 2:30
  Speaker 3: What I really love about my gift is that in order to exercise the gift in a way that brings really true joy to me, you know there are different manifestations of using the gift or manifesting the gift, but in order to get real joy it has to be done in community, and that's an aspect of a giver that's prevalent is they love community, and the first part of that community is God and me.
• 2:57
  Speaker 3: I really have to spend time with him to get direction.
• 3:02
  Speaker 3: I've got to get off by myself with him to get direction.
• 3:08
  Speaker 3: I've got to get off by myself.
• 3:09
  Speaker 3: I need to find the places where I feel like he's going to be more accessible to my spirit, just in terms of the way I receive.
• 3:13
  Speaker 3: That usually means getting outdoors as much as possible.
• 3:17
  Speaker 3: It could be working in my yard.
• 3:19
  Speaker 3: It could be sitting out with a good book, which then ultimately leads to me looking up at the trees and just enjoying the views of the tall trees.
• 3:28
  Speaker 3: Here in the South we've got some really wonderful trees to look at.
• 3:32
  Speaker 3: It could be sitting next to a window and looking out on a skate.
• 3:37
  Speaker 3: It could be biking I do a lot of biking.
• 3:39
  Speaker 3: We have nice green lines, and so it could be going out on a bike trail.
• 3:43
  Speaker 3: That's a pretty great thing to do, and then if I throw in some worship music into any of those venues, then that's going to put me in a really good place to get into that listening mode and understand how he loves me and what he might want to say to me.
• 4:00
  Speaker 3: And the saying is the gift is again a lot about community, it's about exercising the gift.
• 4:06
  Speaker 3: It's not a solitary gift, and so that then leads me into community with individuals.
• 4:13
  Speaker 3: In my professional life I'm a financial advisor and so I get to know a lot about the families, the individuals that are my clients, and one of the things that I've gotten, I guess you'd say sort of good at.
• 4:29
  Speaker 3: My colleagues say I'll ask anything, but it takes me back to what Jesus asked what do you want?
• 4:36
  Speaker 3: And in that conversation where I can ask people what do you want, then I can begin to use my resources, my network and just my brain anything that I can bring to the table to help solve that problem or fulfill that need.
• 4:53
  Speaker 3: So that's what I really love and what joy there is when people honestly open their hearts to you and talk to you about what they really want.
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I 100% agree with what Ashley's saying.
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: That whole community piece is really important and that's what I love about being a giver and it's interesting because I was growing up I was pretty introverted and didn't love, you know, being around a ton of people, but then as I've grown and matured, I've realized, no, that that specific social network of being able to connect communities and and be a part of a community has been so life-giving and being able to help other people live in community and the vertical relationship, the horizontal relationship that we have with God and with others, and in a different way but similar to you, ashley, I do mediation, so I have these clients that I also get to work with their family systems and I get to help them form better communities and think about the way, like you're doing that in the financial planning realm in a very different way, and I'm doing that in the in the mediation world, helping them work through conflict.
• 5:52
  Speaker 2: And I think the flexibility and the freedom of the giver gift like freedom is a huge word and being able to choose like, like you were saying, actually just the outdoor space love.
• 6:01
  Speaker 2: I love to be outdoors, but being able to choose and be flexible in my day in my vocation, in my life, getting to go like do I want to go outside today and take a bike ride I love riding bikes too Do I want to go to the beach today?
• 6:14
  Speaker 2: Do I want to just sit and look out the window today and do I want to put worship music on?
• 6:19
  Speaker 2: Like all those different ways help me connect with God.
• 6:22
  Speaker 2: But knowing that each day I get the freedom to choose those things, like that part gives me life.
• 6:28
  Speaker 2: Knowing that there's just the freedom in choosing those things, along with that community aspect, there's a lot of things I love about being a giver.
• 6:35
  Speaker 2: I think it's very life giving.
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: A follow up question for you too.
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: For this gift, more than other gifts, it may take a while to figure out that this is who you are.
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: Is that your story for either one of you, and why do you think it took a little longer to kind of hone in on the fact that your most dominant gift was the giver gift?
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: Ashley, I know you have a story, but I'll speak to it first.
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: I think for me, the giver gift was often associated with money.
• 7:04
  Speaker 2: And so growing up, when I was learning about I mean, I learned about the gifts when I was a teenager and I thought, well, I just I don't have a lot of money, so I'm not a giver it was kind of a very black and white way of thinking.
• 7:14
  Speaker 2: And then I realized, no, it's actually bigger than that.
• 7:17
  Speaker 2: And, interestingly enough, the verse there was this particular season in my high school, during my high school time, where I was praying.
• 7:24
  Speaker 2: I was specifically praying Lord.
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: I think I want to go into youth ministry Is this something you're calling me to and leading me into?
• 7:33
  Speaker 2: And there was a verse that God used in 2 Corinthians and it says and here is my advice about what is best for you in this matter Last year you were the first not only to give, but also to have the desire to do so.
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: Now finish the work so that your eager willingness to do it may be matched by your completion of it according to your means.
• 7:50
  Speaker 2: And I thought it's not just about money, it's about resources, it is about money, it is about the financial realm, but giving is so much bigger than money.
• 8:02
  Speaker 2: And so I think a lot of teaching that I had heard had just drilled it down to financial.
• 8:08
  Speaker 2: And so when I recognized it is financial because I love giving financially but it's also about all of the resources that we have and I had thought along the way, I had thought maybe I have a lot of profit gift in me I thought maybe I'm a prophet, but it didn't resonate the same way and I had thought, well, maybe I'm a ruler.
• 8:28
  Speaker 2: I knew I wasn't a mercy, I knew I wasn't a servant.
• 8:30
  Speaker 2: There were certain ones that I knew didn't resonate as well, but it was really.
• 8:33
  Speaker 2: When I came to a Ruach conference where I really got to sit with the Lord and in the quietness of that space and honestly reading through the giver and praying and asking the Lord to speak to my spirit, soul and body, I just started weeping because I was like this is it?
• 8:51
  Speaker 2: This is it.
• 8:52
  Speaker 2: I know, ashley, you have a story as well with the other gifts.
• 8:57
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it was confusing for me for a long time because, like a lot of women, in certain jobs you do the ruler job and actually men too, I would say.
• 9:10
  Speaker 3: But I'd say it's more confusing probably for a woman because you take on those characteristics of ruler in a different way that I think, than men do.
• 9:19
  Speaker 3: So, having been in business, corporate finance, financial affairs, et cetera, ruler just felt right.
• 9:28
  Speaker 3: I was always a project manager too, I like to manage things, and so the Ruler gift really just fit into that all the way from, you know, junior high, when you take leadership roles all the way through, leadership roles all the way through.
• 9:48
  Speaker 3: So it took some breathing for me to kind of get away from the hustle bustle of the job, to have more time alone and to think about and literally to go through all these different gifts and think about them.
• 9:59
  Speaker 3: And today I would say that when I look at the giver and I couldn't say this 20 years ago, so I think some of this has actually developed and flourished over the last 20 years I can now say that I can look at every single one of these points and explain why that's me, but it just took a long time to get that clarity.
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think both of you, I know, are excellent leaders and, as you say, ashley, you do in your job and in just who you are and how you think you do show a lot of the aspects of the ruler gift, but it's getting away from what you do to who you are, and y'all are both excellent leaders, but you lead from that giver gift and it looks very different than how a different gift would lead, and so I think that is so important and I know both of you.
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: It took a minute and a journey and I did the one thing to Kimberly that we tell people not to do.
• 10:55
  Speaker 1: I tried to at one point, help out my friend and tell her what her gift was, and I was wrong in what I told her I thought her gift was, and so it was just really sweet when God confirmed to both of you in his own ways this is who you are and this is what I like about you.
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: So I think that would be encouraging because I think, of all the gifts that come to our conferences or go through the free to be you study, this is the one that it may take the longest to kind of hone in and decide this is who I am.
• 11:25
  Speaker 1: Do y'all agree with that?
• 11:27
  Speaker 3: Yeah, one little humorous anecdote I'll add is that I was so convincing that Elizabeth and Sylvia asked me to join the team as a ruler.
• 11:36
  Speaker 3: Oh, yeah.
• 11:37
  Speaker 3: Part of that also was that there weren't many women raising their hands as rulers, so I was pretty good incognito as a ruler.
• 11:47
  Speaker 3: People couldn't figure out my giver for a long time.
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: I agree, you do a very good impersonation of a ruler gift.
• 11:55
  Speaker 3: But it was.
• 11:55
  Speaker 3: I mean, maybe that was Lord's will because it allowed me to come on as helpers and staff for you guys.
• 12:03
  Speaker 3: So yeah, absolutely Absolutely.
• 12:06
  Speaker 2: I think it took time, for sure, and there were seasons where I would not have thought of myself as a giver.
• 12:13
  Speaker 2: But once you stuck with the process long enough to just okay, I don't have to have the answer or I can think that I'm this gift and that's okay.
• 12:23
  Speaker 2: We do have all portions of the nine gifts within us, right?
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: And so just being able to, to give myself the time and the freedom to be patient with it Once it resonated, it was a deep resonation, it was a deep knowing.
• 12:37
  Speaker 2: Like Ashley said, you know, as and even as you mature and you get older, you look at these things and you go.
• 12:42
  Speaker 2: I can point to almost all of.
• 12:44
  Speaker 2: For me it's almost all of them.
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: You know, ashley's a little ahead of me there and so, but being able to look at them and go, I can point as to why this describes me and how this describes me.
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: And also, for me, it was that I took my calling and I was in youth ministry for 25 years and I took that calling and that true passion and calling to do that vocationally very seriously.
• 13:02
  Speaker 2: And there was a season where I looked at the passage that God had used and I thought, well, he's talking about money there.
• 13:11
  Speaker 2: I must have misinterpreted that.
• 13:12
  Speaker 2: And then I recognized no, god was speaking to my spirit deeply as a giver.
• 13:14
  Speaker 2: But it took years of feeling, not incognito, but feeling like a fraud sometimes, if I've done something wrong here, and then came to the place where, no, that was so tender and precious of the lord to use that passage, knowing how he had designed me.
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: But that was hindsight right yeah, yeah, I love the journey that both of you have been on as you think about your giver gift, and each of the gifts reflects part of the nature of who god is.
• 13:40
  Speaker 1: How do you see the giverness of God?
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: How do you reflect God's characteristics of the giver gift?
• 13:49
  Speaker 3: Well, what comes to mind for me is that God is always good, he's always kind, he's always generous, and that would be for me.
• 14:00
  Speaker 3: If I could perform at that level, so to speak.
• 14:03
  Speaker 3: That would be tremendous.
• 14:05
  Speaker 3: I mean, that's the perfect giver, someone who is good and generous and wisdom would be great.
• 14:11
  Speaker 3: To be wise as well as you exercise the gift.
• 14:14
  Speaker 3: The other side of it is I love the passage and I'm not great on all the scripture references, but what comes to mind is that when you ask God for a loaf of bread, he doesn't give you a snake.
• 14:27
  Speaker 3: And that's where the giver's heart is is to always help and to always try to solve the problem.
• 14:37
  Speaker 3: Perhaps provide the resource that's where the heart is them.
• 14:46
  Speaker 3: Perhaps provide the resource that's where the heart is, and withholding is the harder thing for a giver and that's where they're exercising wisdom.
• 14:50
  Speaker 3: Just as Jesus didn't heal everybody, so he withheld his gift from time to time.
• 14:55
  Speaker 3: But I also think that is a reflection of God and one we need to be aware of.
• 15:00
  Speaker 2: Ashley mentioned this earlier.
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: She is known for asking a lot of questions and I think that that was very characteristic of Jesus in the New Testament and when we look at the Gospels, we see Jesus regularly asking and probing with questions.
• 15:14
  Speaker 2: And I love Ashley and I have never talked about this, but I heard her when she said you know, Jesus said what do you want?
• 15:19
  Speaker 2: I often will use that and I think that's interesting that as givers we really are prone to that.
• 15:24
  Speaker 2: We're drawn to that question that Jesus asked of what is it that you want?
• 15:27
  Speaker 2: Like he is, he is a good father, he is generous, he is kind and very wise.
• 15:33
  Speaker 2: And I think, in addition to that, when we look at the whole of Scripture with God, the Father and the and the Holy Spirit, we see this there's an element of connection which givers like to see, that connection through time, that connection, the legacy piece, and I think God was very concerned about how the people of Israel walked out their faith and connected with others and connected with Him and being present with them.
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: I don't even know if I can put it into words, but I think there's that.
• 16:00
  Speaker 2: We see Abraham in the Old Testament and where God said you'll be the father of many nations, right Like he was concerned about connecting others and connecting himself to others, and I think that's also where we see that giver heart of God.
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: Both of you have referenced the word community a lot.
• 16:17
  Speaker 1: Since we've been talking, and, Kimberly, just as you were saying Father, Son and Holy Spirit, I was like, well, there's a community right there.
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: So God himself is a community of three in one.
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: So I think that's great.
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: You know, we all have parts of ourselves that we're not as in love with and don't like as much.
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: So from your giver gift, what is the part where you struggle or you wish your design was a little different than it is?
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: Or is this the perfect gift?
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: Of course it's the perfect gift.
• 16:49
  Speaker 2: I know for me time, time can be something that's a tricky thing, because time is a resource and I can be very particular with my time and not always generous with my time.
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: Very particular with my time and not always generous with my time, and I know that sometimes that can get me in trouble, meaning I will choose if I don't use wisdom.
• 17:08
  Speaker 2: Sometimes I can choose to say no to something I need to say yes to, but more more so than that I will.
• 17:14
  Speaker 2: Often I like to keep my options open, and so by keeping the options open, sometimes I will not communicate well with others what my intention is or what my desire is, and so, with a time orientation, I can say, yeah, let's do this, but then I may get lost in something else, and so I think a lot of it is just what I.
• 17:34
  Speaker 2: What I love about the gift is being able to think of all the options, and what I don't love about the gift is sometimes those options are just too vast and too many, and they can be overwhelming.
• 17:44
  Speaker 3: I really relate to the time element.
• 17:46
  Speaker 3: I'm always late and it'll be five minutes because I can get something in before I leave to do that and I've really had to rein myself in on that and just say wait that thing later, later for that thing that you think you can squeeze in.
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: Yep, I understand Kimberly and I were roommates and so I understand the no we need to leave now.
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: But there's these options of three more things we could do before we leave the struggle that goes on there.
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: What do you wish people understood about your gift?
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: Maybe some of the inner dialogue that you don't necessarily share with other people, but, as you interact with the other six gifts, what do you wish that they understood about you?
• 18:36
  Speaker 3: I'll jump in here and I'll sort of answer both of those questions.
• 18:40
  Speaker 3: Maybe in this one I have a very high radar for value, and this is a silly little thing, but it's exemplar of it.
• 18:50
  Speaker 3: Wasting anything is really off-putting for me, to the extent that if I don't squeeze the last drop of honey out of the honey bottle, I've done a bad thing.
• 19:02
  Speaker 3: And when my husband throws it in the trash with, you know, one eighth left, it bothers me.
• 19:08
  Speaker 3: So there's again a sense of resources and that resources should be respected and honored and used wisely.
• 19:18
  Speaker 3: That can come back and bite me.
• 19:21
  Speaker 3: And used wisely, that can come back and bite me.
• 19:25
  Speaker 3: This is one of those negatives in terms of what I don't like about it, in that because I hold resources in esteem, let's say, I can obsess over planning so that there are resources in the future, rather than relying upon God day by day by day for the flow and the resources that he wants me to have for my needs, other needs.
• 19:44
  Speaker 3: It's not my responsibility, I have to remind myself.
• 19:48
  Speaker 3: It's not my responsibility to provide for everyone all the time.
• 19:51
  Speaker 3: He's got them, all of them, and he's got me too, all the time.
• 19:56
  Speaker 3: So I hope to do better with that.
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: I am so glad to know that I'm not alone in that.
• 20:02
  Speaker 2: I thought I was the only one trying to get that last little drop of honey and that last little bit of the toothpaste out of the container.
• 20:10
  Speaker 2: Oftentimes, people that live with me will say why is that still in here?
• 20:16
  Speaker 2: And I'm like, because it's still usable.
• 20:18
  Speaker 2: There's still some in there.
• 20:19
  Speaker 2: Because it's still usable, there's still some in there.
• 20:23
  Speaker 2: The other thing that comes to mind for me is the value piece, as well as being relentless.
• 20:31
  Speaker 2: A lot of times people think that I persevere and that I'm relentless because I'm just like pushing something.
• 20:35
  Speaker 2: I'm trying to push an agenda or I'm trying to push my desire, when in what I'm trying to do is like get to the best thing, get to the best value, get to the highest quality.
• 20:46
  Speaker 2: And again, that can bite us right Because it is pushing.
• 20:51
  Speaker 2: But I wish people understood my heart in that, because the heart behind that is genuinely.
• 20:57
  Speaker 2: 99% of the time it is genuinely.
• 21:00
  Speaker 2: I just want to know if we've made the wisest decision.
• 21:03
  Speaker 2: I just want to know if we've got the best product.
• 21:05
  Speaker 2: I just want to know.
• 21:07
  Speaker 2: Elizabeth and I have this story of when we were roommates in Atlanta back in the day I needed to go to the mall for something and I think it was a pair of khaki pants, because I was in youth ministry and everybody wore khaki pants back in the 90s.
• 21:19
  Speaker 2: And we found a pair of khaki pants but there were two other stores that might have another pair of khaki pants and I was like, can we go?
• 21:25
  Speaker 2: Well, it was only two more stores because Elizabeth's limit was three stores so I had to cap it at three.
• 21:29
  Speaker 2: But I was like there may be a better pair in this store.
• 21:32
  Speaker 2: She's like but you found a pair and I was like, but it may not be the best pair, like let's just push through to one more store, to one more story, and that again a silly example, but I do that in the big things as well and I wish again it can be a negative, but what I wish people understood is my heart in that with others is often I'm trying to find the best care for someone, the best option, the best wanting quality, wanting value and quality out of it.
• 21:58
  Speaker 3: At least they didn't give you the name that I received.
• 22:01
  Speaker 3: I was here, I don't know.
• 22:02
  Speaker 3: I've joined this firm about 25 years ago.
• 22:05
  Speaker 3: About five years into it, in a casual setting, someone let it fly that they had a, a nickname for me, and I'm like huh, what, what?
• 22:14
  Speaker 3: Oh well, we used to call you the hammer, now we call you the velvet hammer, because we know you're well-intentioned.
• 22:21
  Speaker 3: We figured that out finally.
• 22:24
  Speaker 3: So yeah, we can feel like hammers at times and we need to put that softening around it so that people know it's out of care and concern.
• 22:33
  Speaker 1: Yes, kimberly, you didn't finish the story.
• 22:35
  Speaker 1: We didn't just go to the three stores, then you took the pants home and then we returned the pants because you went to another, like there's lots of buying pants home and then we returned the pants because you went to another, like there's lots of buying pants and returning pants to get the, because there's always potential that the perfect pair of khaki pants is still out there.
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: So, um, yeah, it needed to be cut off but for those that live with a giver, they need to know.
• 22:59
  Speaker 1: The whole story is that that will and I would think that that is a thought process that is running through your mind all the time about analyzing and possibly overanalyzing the options.
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: Does that get?
• 23:14
  Speaker 2: exhausting sometimes.
• 23:14
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I mean, I know, I know for me it's something that just it feels normal.
• 23:20
  Speaker 2: It feels normal to just analyze and keep analyzing and it can.
• 23:25
  Speaker 2: For me it can be decisions, it can be in my, in my, you know, in my business world.
• 23:29
  Speaker 2: It has to do with fixing problems for people, finding the solutions for people, and, and again, I think they're going to get a great product because I'm going to analyze it to the nth degree.
• 23:39
  Speaker 2: So in the end I see the benefit of it.
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: But yeah, the downside is that, like you never, can you ever really be satisfied?
• 23:47
  Speaker 2: Can you ever really find the ideal?
• 23:50
  Speaker 2: People tell me I'm too idealistic or I'm looking for the best thing out there, and I'm like, is that a problem?
• 23:55
  Speaker 2: But it can be.
• 23:58
  Speaker 2: I think, Ashley, you talked about that earlier.
• 24:01
  Speaker 2: I'm beginning to that earlier.
• 24:03
  Speaker 3: I'm going to call it my obsession with perfection.
• 24:07
  Speaker 3: Let's just try that one out.
• 24:08
  Speaker 3: My obsession with perfection, that I've really got to back off of that because I don't have the time in my life to spend using my brain in that fashion.
• 24:21
  Speaker 3: It's not relaxing.
• 24:23
  Speaker 3: And the older you get I'm older than Kimberly you realize you only have so much energy in a day, and so there's great value to me in that meditative time, emptying my brain or getting on that bike.
• 24:37
  Speaker 3: When I'm distracted, I'm listening to music.
• 24:40
  Speaker 3: I'm trying to get away from that tenacious working my brain to solve something it used to be.
• 24:48
  Speaker 3: Everything was a puzzle and a fun puzzle.
• 24:51
  Speaker 3: I love jigsaw puzzles, crossword puzzles, all that stuff I love.
• 24:58
  Speaker 3: There is a point where I need to be more relational.
• 25:02
  Speaker 3: I need to spend more time talking to people.
• 25:05
  Speaker 3: I need to be patient.
• 25:06
  Speaker 3: We don't need to eat dinner and rush off.
• 25:07
  Speaker 3: We need to sit there for a while and just visit and not let my brain go back to digging into a problem.
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so, understanding all of these things about your giver gift, how do you think others could be hurt by a giver gift, even unintentionally, like for me that's very easy to answer from a prophet because I can just come in a room and take over, but I think with the giver it might be a little more subtle.
• 25:36
  Speaker 1: So how do you think you might intentionally hurt, unintentionally hurt others based on your design?
• 25:44
  Speaker 3: I take over and solve their problems for them, instead of them solving their problems and learning and growing up and we are growing up till we die.
• 25:53
  Speaker 3: So I've really got to deploy the Sylvia formula of God Is this you, is this for now, is this for me?
• 26:03
  Speaker 3: What is my portion in it?
• 26:11
  Speaker 2: Because I can run away with all kinds of ideas of how I can help this person or solve their problems.
• 26:14
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think similarly to that.
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: When I first started practicing mediation, I would have people in my office who I would have the solution for them.
• 26:22
  Speaker 2: I would say here's what you need to do right, and wisdom is knowing how to let them come to that conclusion.
• 26:28
  Speaker 2: And it's interesting that, as givers, we love questions, but we have to find the wisdom in knowing is the question genuinely a question that we're asking them, or is the question us probing to get them into our agenda and our solution?
• 26:41
  Speaker 2: Because we do have solutions and that's good and it is something that we have to offer others.
• 26:46
  Speaker 2: But there's times when, like Ashley said, sometimes we have to pull back and we have to know now's not the time for me to offer that solution.
• 26:53
  Speaker 2: Now's the time for me to sit with them and allow them to come up with their solutions and for me to help them flesh it out.
• 26:59
  Speaker 2: And for me to help them flesh it out.
• 27:01
  Speaker 2: And so sometimes that can hurt others because we in turn enable them or we fix things when it's not ours to fix.
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I can see that.
• 27:09
  Speaker 1: So let's end on a positive here, because I think there's a lot that could be said about this.
• 27:14
  Speaker 1: How do you see your gift impacting others, impacting other gifts impacting communities?
• 27:21
  Speaker 1: Let's celebrate the giver gift.
• 27:25
  Speaker 2: One of the things we haven't talked about is the favor in the marketplace.
• 27:28
  Speaker 2: We haven't touched on that yet.
• 27:30
  Speaker 2: I do think that as givers, we naturally have flow with resources, and resources have a flow with us that other people don't experience.
• 27:40
  Speaker 2: And sometimes people will say how did that happen?
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: How did you get that?
• 27:43
  Speaker 2: How did that end up happening?
• 27:44
  Speaker 2: And I'm like, I don't know, it just happened, and I think that's where God comes in and he's allowing those gifts to like where we have that gift, and so it is this.
• 27:55
  Speaker 2: Sometimes I don't even know how to explain this one.
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: Elizabeth and Ashley, maybe you can speak to it too, but it's a.
• 28:00
  Speaker 2: It's to me.
• 28:01
  Speaker 2: It's just this I think when we are in a situation, if we're aware enough to persist and to ask the right questions and to to allow the spirit to use that situation, we get access to things that other gifts wouldn't have access to absolutely.
• 28:19
  Speaker 1: I've seen that many a time with you, Kimberly.
• 28:21
  Speaker 3: It's definitely not explainable, it's not in us, it is a flow from God.
• 28:28
  Speaker 3: So that's the main thing to recognize.
• 28:32
  Speaker 3: I think the benefit is that what I see and it's really rather lovely because it's usually in a one-on-one setting for me where I see that person breathe a sigh of relief, the particular thing that's been brought forward, the resource or the network or the whatever it is that comes to allow them to feel like here's a solution, potential solution, but here's a solution.
• 29:03
  Speaker 3: It's as though God just kissed you and said it's okay and there's a sigh of relief and wow, to experience that it's a bit like a healing.
• 29:17
  Speaker 3: I've never healed anybody, never expect I will, but I've kind of heard that people who have been in situations where people were healed and maybe physicians would experience this.
• 29:28
  Speaker 3: There's such a joy in seeing that experience from that person.
• 29:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think there's a resourcefulness and a steady eddy ability to just keep looking at options and situations and to also use wisdom, filter the wisdom in with those things that we get to do exactly what Ashley's talking about, and it is.
• 29:50
  Speaker 2: It is a gift, it is the Holy Spirit doing that and I think of you know just recently, ashley, you were able to do that for me when we were we were looking for a place in Memphis to have an event and I remember you got on for years like I think we have a, I think I have a place here, and you called me on FaceTime and I was like, like did?
• 30:07
  Speaker 2: I took a sigh of relief because I was like this is it.
• 30:10
  Speaker 2: We found it and Ashley was the catalyst for that and that was such a sigh of relief for going.
• 30:16
  Speaker 2: We'd been kind of putting our heads together and here it was and just being able to experience that that you knew, like I knew, this is a gift from the Lord that he has used Ashley to open up for us and it's a beautiful piece of seeing God's handiwork through our community.
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: Absolutely.
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: I echo that.
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: I also read a huge sigh of relief because it felt like we had tried everything we knew how to do, and then we call you and what was it?
• 30:41
  Speaker 1: Four to six hours at the most later, it's like bing bang, boom.
• 30:44
  Speaker 1: Oh here, a fabulous location, and we had a great time when we came to Memphis and a lot of people's lives were impacted through God speaking to them.
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: So it's just.
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: It was amazing to just watch that happen.
• 30:58
  Speaker 3: So grateful.
• 30:59
  Speaker 3: We will have a lot of Memphians heading to Fall Ruach.
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: We're so excited.
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: We can't wait to see all of our old friends one more time up there.
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: We can't wait to see all of our old friends one more time up there.
• 31:08
  Speaker 3: We have quite a few little small groups formed up to do Rock One and it will be coming to Rock Two.
• 31:14
  Speaker 3: It's very exciting.
• 31:16
  Speaker 1: That is awesome.
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: We are so looking forward to it and we can't wait for you to see that facility and, kimberly, that was you where we're headed.
• 31:24
  Speaker 1: This fall we again had tried several different places throughout the Southeast and it's just like door closed, door closed, door, closed, door closed.
• 31:32
  Speaker 1: And all of a sudden Kimberly was like let's go here.
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: I was like, okay, and when we got there, the land, the buildings, the way they run this facility is just absolutely stellar and five-star.
• 31:44
  Speaker 1: And so I think Kimberly was able to use her, give her a gift and allow it to flow through her to kind of repair the place for us for this fall.
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: So I just think that's amazing.
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: One bonus question for you two, as we close People who are listening to this and just starting to discover the gifts and they think they might be a giver, but they're not really sure.
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: Do you two have any advice for them about how to go about this?
• 32:09
  Speaker 3: I'd say relax into it, don't get too cerebral or force it and don't worry if it takes a while.
• 32:19
  Speaker 3: Just keep praying it before the Lord and living your life and making observations on whether it fits or not.
• 32:28
  Speaker 3: And you may, like the rest of us, you may land somewhere else and be very happy in that gift and it's great to have all seven gifts.
• 32:36
  Speaker 3: So live in some other ones for a while and then see if this one comes around.
• 32:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I was gonna say, be patient with the process and actually you talked about perfection earlier and I think that's something I get really hung up on and I see these people say progress over perfection, progress over perfection, like yes, yes, but I have a little bit more, and take a breath and take a step back and be patient with the process and get out of that headspace a little bit and just allow the spirit to speak to you.
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: Awesome.
• 33:19
  Speaker 2: Well, as we wrap up our conversation today, I want to remind everyone that our Ruach Journey Conference is coming soon.
• 33:24
  Speaker 2: It's going to be October 16 through 18.
• 33:27
  Speaker 2: You can register at our website, wwwthefathersbusinesscom backslash events.
• 33:34
  Speaker 2: Go there, sign up, register.
• 33:36
  Speaker 2: It is going to be an amazing time.
• 33:39
  Speaker 2: If you've been listening to this podcast, you will get to meet several of our leaders that will be there and we can't wait for you to join us.
• 33:46
  Speaker 2: We can't wait to be together.
• 33:47
  Speaker 2: We can't wait for you to meet them and interact with them and learn more about your gift and how it operates within all of your relationships and within the body of Christ.
• 33:56
  Speaker 2: So join us.
• 33:57
  Speaker 2: It's going to be at the Sandy Cove Conference Center in Maryland and, yeah, it's going to be great.
• 34:03
  Speaker 2: So if you have any questions, reach out and let us know.
• 34:06
  Speaker 2: There's an info contact button on our website as well, but we would look forward to hearing from you and bring a friend, Come and register and we hope to see you in October.
• 34:15
  Speaker 2: I want to thank you for listening to the Father's Business Podcast.
• 34:25
  Speaker 1: This podcast is made possible through donations by people like you.
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: To donate, go to wwwTheFathersBusinesscom.
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: Be sure to follow us at the Fathers Biz on Instagram and Facebook.