Latest / Black Girls Are Easy Podcast / Listen To This Before You Date! - By G.L. Lambert

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Listen To This Before You Date! - By G.L. Lambert · Black Girls Are Easy Podcast

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G. L. Lambert Hellou. You only get one chance at a first
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impression, So let's start with the easiest way to tattoo a man's brain,
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the screening stage. Think of this as pre date reconnaissance, where you're mindful
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that not every man that gets your attention deserves to date you. A spartan
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scrutinizes a man from the moment he enters her world. Red flags are missed
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early on because you don't pay as much attention as you should during the pre
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date. Allow me to clear up some confusion, as I've seen women be
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brainwashed with these early dating stage labels that don't mean shit. Talking stage meaning
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that you're deciding on if you should date exclusively, dating stage meaning that you're
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dating but have an exclusive agreement. Relationship stage meaning that you have agreed to
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a monogamous partnership. There is no talking stage basica. There is no exclusive
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dating during the dating stage. If you're going to be exclusive, then you
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are in an official relationship. A man doesn't get to test you out as
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a pretend girlfriend. What the fuck are you thinking? The semantics are important
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because I know how men use these labels to exploit women into being overly loyal.
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If you can't even be loyal during the talking stage, why would I
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even date you seriously? Is something I've seen pulled multiple times and guess what
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women fall for it. We are following the Spartan dating pyramid pre date dating
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relationship. These three steps will save you a lot of confusion and trouble.
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This chapter will help focus you. The steps that follow do not require you
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to meet guy a certain way. I don't care if you meet on an
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app, in a store, if he was introduced by a friend, or
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if you sat next to him on the train and ask the time. The
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moment a man comes into your orbit, the battle begins. As in my
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book ho Tactics, I will use a composite of various women that I have
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gathered dating stories from in order to show you how these steps can be done
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the right way as well as the wrong way. Similar to the Spartan phoenix
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example from earlier, you will see how a confident and powerful outlook will make
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previously scary situations easy and stress free. While reading, picture yourself in these
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situations. Visualization is key because you're actually going to do these things. See
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yourself in her shoes, feel yourself wielding her power. Let's call this Spartan
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dater Calli. Through Callly's eyes, we will conquer the most common scenarios you
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will face, the introduction, the initial reach out, the setting of the
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date, the actual dates, the sex transitioning from dating into a relationship.
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Don't picture some superwoman in your mind. Physically, what Calli is about to
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do isn't because her ass is a certain size, breasts are perfect, eyebrows
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are on fleek. None of that shit matters when pulling this off. Everything
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she does is due to two things. Spartan confidence and the ability to open
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her mouth and use that Spartan power to get what she wants. That is
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all you need. Day zero, setting the bait, Nicole is ready for
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war. She's made up her mind that she wants something serious from a man.
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No more random hookups, no more entertaining bums out of boredom, and
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no more wasting time on men with potential but no follow through. If the
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vibe doesn't scream king, she will not be bothered. Nicole focused in on
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her goal, transformed her mind into that of a fearless warrior queen, and
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has begun to reshape her visual brand into that of a sexy huntress. Nicole
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has embraced Spartan hood and renamed herself Spartan Calli to reflect her laid back attitude,
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Hollywood swag, and sonny approach to her game. She has waited patiently
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for the right man to manifest, and now the time is upon her to
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earn her Spartan stripes by putting everything written thus far into action. Where do
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you meet men? Everywhere? Setting the bait and adding a man to your
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roster can happen anywhere. Supermarket, doctor's office, dm V, Instagram,
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super Bowl party, barbecue, you name it. If you're not seeing men
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you find attractive online or offline, then you're full of shit. You have
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given your number, maybe even dated guys who weren't that good looking. Are
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you really going to tell me that three hundred and sixty five days out of
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the year you don't see guys who look better than at least one of your
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exes? Of course you do. This is sparta That there are no eligible
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men in this city, or I only see weirdos online does not exist.
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Remember that you create the world you live in, So if you're not seeing
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them, it's because you don't believe in your power. As a creator.
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This chapter is about setting the bait and proactively bringing a man into your world.
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The first step is to believe in your power because everything is mental.
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No like you know the sun will rise tomorrow, that you will meet a
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man who will allow you to set the bait. By the end of this
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month, within thirty days, you will exchange numbers, contact, and bait
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a man into eating out the palm of your hands. Say it, feel
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it, know it. Step one the exchange Spartan. Calli was in Starbucks
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when a man walked in, drawing her attention without even trying. Handsome but
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not overly pretty, business casual, but with his own style added on.
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This was her type visually. Unfortunately, this guy was too focused on his
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iPhone to scan the line, so Calli missed her opportunity to I fuck him
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like a fat kid Ie Fox a Crispy kream box. Not one to chase,
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Callie simply waited for life to provide her with an opportunity to take.
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As Calli stepped out of line to wait for her machiato, she again glanced
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over to the line. This cute guy was still missing his opportunity by overly
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eyeballing his phone. Calli remained patient, her own phone still in her bag,
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because no one in her current inbox was as important as adding a new
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member to her shrinking roster. Callie's machiato was ready just as iPhone Dick finished
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ordering, so she waited a moment to see if he would come closer.
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As she picked up her cup, once again, iPhone Dick shied away,
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choosing to stand a few feet away and not once looking up. Calli stayed
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poised, walked over to the condiment table to add an extra sugar in the
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raw to her drink, and then there it was her shot. The barista
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called his name Latte for Stephen. Callie put the lid back on her drink
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and turned, ready to conquer. In a page out of Maria the Hole's
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playbook, she invaded Steve Evan's personal space and went to work with her pool
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game. Stephen, she said, with full authority, as if she had
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known this man for years. Did they misspell the name on your cup too?
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Calli was now in his face with a slight grin. Stephen didn't know
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if she was serious or joking, so, like any man that's not used
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to women speaking first, he fumbled around for a second before regaining his cool.
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He checked his cup to see if his name was indeed fucked up.
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Stephen revealed that they did ruin his name by spelling it ste v e n.
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From there, Callie confessed that she would have spelled it the normal way
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as well, poking fun at the actual spelling of his name with her own
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brand of teas flirting. The two share to laugh, and at that moment
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Calli used her goddess given opportunity to I fuck him. A woman who masters
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proper eye fucking doesn't have to say she's interested a man. After that,
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it became elementary the so are you on your way to work? Chit?
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The do you live in the area chat. In the end, Calli walked
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out of there with Stephen's business card and a half promise to give him a
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call sometime. Callie could call Stephen that night and start a getting to know
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him conversation, or she could send a cute it was nice running into you
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text before bed. However, she isn't in a rush and realizes that giving
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him a day to wonder if she was actually interested will make her that much
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more desirable. Callie is a spartan. She isn't worried about looking thirsty by
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calling or texting too soon. This is a man she actually wants. She's
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not going to let gender sanctions turn her into some shy mouse. She's a
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lioness and she's going to eat him alive. But it's always good to play
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with the prey before sinking your teeth in. Calli waits until the next afternoon
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to reach out. On her lunch break, she sends him a quick text,
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did I have you in Starbucks? Daring them to misspell your name again
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this morning. Questions are always the best form of texts. They exist to
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be answered, unlike a basic Hey, this is Cally from yesterday. I
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hope everything is good with you. That shit is sand paper dry. Calli
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has set the bait by asking a question and making a joke at the same
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time. Any man who reads that will grin. Within five minutes, Calli
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has a response back, I started to go hard, but I looked around
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and didn't have you as backup. Calli grins. He's both witty and handsome.
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At this moment, Calli has all the power before he fires off a
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how's your day going text that leads to chit chat that doesn't move this far
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forward. She hits him with a to be continued reply. Callie texts lol
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and tells Stephen that she will give him a call tonight after she's off the
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clock, unless his girlfriend objects. This bitch is bad. Not only did
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she lay the seeds of call me, don't text me, she also has
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girlfriend checked him. Stephen responds with I don't have one of those smiley sunglasses
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emoji cool. I'm usually home after seven mission complete, Callie only has to
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write K and keep it moving. Stephen, meanwhile, is at work thinking
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about this new aggressive female and assuming that is going to be easy pussy.
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He has no idea. He just cross paths with a spartan who is in
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complete control. Step two. The contact CALLI is not a robot. She
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feels the excitement of nerves that any woman would feel when about to call a
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new man for the first time. This isn't fear. This is the anticipation
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of possibilities. Stephen could be fool's gold a guy. She talks to this
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one time and gets turned off by the moment he says something ignorant. He
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could become a guy in the roster. She tests out for a month and
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then cuts when he starts to disappoint. There is a strong chance, based
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on the initial chemistry, that Stephen could be the one not only her next
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boyfriend, but her last boyfriend. There's no way to tell at this point,
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so why even give those what IF's thoughts energy? Nicole would be overthinking
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everything, but not Calli. Spartans, don't sweat. Calli is about to
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bring the fire and do her part in presenting this man with someone who acts
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like a queen. It will be on him him to respond like a king.
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If Stephen comes off as corny, overly sexual, dry, or starts
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to preach about conspiracy theories, then he fails, not her. Even when
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you are in pursuit, you are still the prize. I went after him,
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so he's not going to work for it now. It's bullshit. You
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took the opportunity to put your greatness on his radar, a gift fell into
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his lap. But he needs to appreciate you and understand that dating you is
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a privilege, not a right. Any indifference or behavior that points to him
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acting too cool gets him immediately cut Any lazy effort or attempt to treat you
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like a slut gets him blocked. Men still have to be men, even
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when you are the one that initiates This spartan rule brings Calli back into focus.
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The nerves have been calmed, and now she can begin to visuales where
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she will take the conversation. When she calls him tonight, you may get
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approached outside or DM doneline and instead of calling him, the man may pop
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up and call you out of the blue. No matter who is calling,
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who be ready to acquire your initial goal a date. Know where you want
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to take the conversation. You are not calling a man for the first time
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just to talk him to death. You need a date, not a four
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hour convo. After your first date, then you can begin the deep conversation
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stage. There is no reason to spill your life story a day after meeting
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a man while on the phone. Becoming fast friends is one of the tricks
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men use to bypass dates. Not here, Calli has visualized and laid out
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three points she will hit when they are on the phone. A put him
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at ease with conversation, B recon his life and c date bait. Callie
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calls Stephen and he picks up in his best smooth voice, which lets Callie
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know he was already doing pregame himself. Callie doesn't care about Steven's game or
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how he thinks he's going to lay it down. She's a fucking spartan and
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she's going to control the pace of the conversation and lead him where she needs
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him to be by the time this call ends. Callie isn't a comedian.
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She doesn't have the insane wit of some geek girl that hooks men from behind
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her keyboard like some millennial Tina Fey. Calli knows her strength is in her
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seduction and goes about teasing Stephen in order to break the ice. She asks
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if he let the phone ring an extra time to show that he wasn't thirsty.
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Stephen responds that he didn't have his phone by him assuring her he wasn't
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playing it cool. Calli doesn't let up. She playfully moans with disappointment that
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scheduling a call didn't get him so excited that he glued that phone to his
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hand. Voice emphasis un excited. The voice is sensual, the tone is
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playful. Calli may be a spartan, but she's mastered the whole tactics that
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get a dick hard via inflection from that playful banter, she transitions into the
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nuances of how his day was, what he actually does it work, and
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if he enjoys it or is this just a stepping stone in his career.
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These aren't big questions, just reconnaissance to see who this man is. In
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general. Calli finds out that Stephen is an accountant rep for a heating company.
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Just as his card said, it's boring work but gets him the experience
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and connections to branch out in a year or two. There is no need
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to talk about ambition or life's ultimate goal. At this point, Stephen responds
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with his own brand of recan So what about you? What do you do?
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Callie doesn't have the world's most fascinating job, so after she tells him
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her company and position, she follows up with more seductive personality. Callie laments
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that she doesn't have her own business card yet, but she's definitely stealing the
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design when she makes it big. Notice the technique. A spartan side steps
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questions about herself and redirects the conversation back to the man by keeping it light
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and flirty. Next, Callie does what few women do. She admits her
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attraction in a real way. She openly tells him how sexy he looked walking
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into that Starbucks and then brings it to I figured that you were texting your
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baby mama the way your eyes were on that phone. Bam. She's telling
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this man that she finds him attractive on the highest level sexy, which translates
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in male language to she will fuck me. Once a man thinks he has
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a sexual green light, he's like a puppy on a leash, excited and
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trying to lead you, but still under your control. The sneak comment about
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a baby mama also opens it up to another recon does he have children?
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Stephen is passing the test. He has a decent job and ambition to get
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an even better one. Now he reveals that he doesn't have any children,
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but slides in that he would love to start a big family when the time
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is right. If Calli were a basic bitch, she would say something like
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haven't found the right woman yet, huh. However, she doesn't have to
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relationship bait by making asinine observations or beating around the bush like an idiot.
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Calli is not trying to put the prushure of her being the right woman,
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having as kids or any long term thoughts in the mind of this man.
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All she wanted to know is if he had little crumb snatchers walking around.
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Mission complete, finished with the recon and having shown off her flirty persona,
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Callie goes in for the kill. She asks, so, what's taken you
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so long to ask me out? Sir? Again, This is said in
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the right tone, with the sexual and submissive word of sir added to show
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him she's not being bitchy or matter of fact. Stephen, like most men,
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responds obediently and asks when she's free. Calli works a non traditional schedule
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and her midweek is her weekend. She doesn't date for Stephen's Friday Saturday convenience,
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so she tells her new man crush that she is only free on Thursday.
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Stephen is nervous. He's not sure if he should take control or let
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her pick a place. He steps lightly, asking her where she wants to
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go. Callie doesn't like that he's the man, thus he should pick.
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She pretends to think about, then sinks her fangs in with let's have dinner
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this Thursday. But I'm going to let you pick the place so I can
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see how good your taste is, babe. Stephen begins to think of a
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place, but Callie's job is done, so it's time to exit. How
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about you call me back this time tomorrow and let me know what you decide
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on. Stephen says he can manage that, and Callie tells him that she
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looks forward to his choice. After one last exchange of flirty banter, she
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laments that she has to go attend to something, but she will be waiting
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for his dinner choice. End of call. Step three the bait. Although
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it was Callie who went for Stephen in the store, texted him and even
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called him first, it is now Stephen who was put in the position to
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show if he's truly interested. A spartan does not assume that a man is
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interested. He is either smart enough to realize the treasure that stands before him
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or dumb enough to let it slip away. There is never a worry about
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coming on too strong or not giving a man a chance to show real interest.
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That phone call was the bait. All men are hunters. They pretend
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not to like to work, but they get off on it. Calli baited
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him with seduction and expressed her requirement to be taken out in a way that
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wasn't demanding or overly aggressive. Now it is up to Stephen to confirm if
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he is interested or not. If Stephen doesn't call the next day, then
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his number is deleted, no second chance. That's how a spartan rolls.
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If Stephen calls with some excuse as to why he can't go out, but
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suggests a house date alternative CALLI will tell him that she will get back to
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him, not really number deleted. There will be no come over and chill
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here, you fuck boy. This is Sparta anything other than I picked such
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and such Is that cool? What time will you be ready? Or there's
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been an emergency and here's proof of it, and Stephen gets deleted from her
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phone without mercy. It doesn't matter how cool he comes off, how attractive
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he is, or how witty his conversation. A man's seriousness must be proved
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via his actions before the dating even starts. That's how a spartan fucking rolls.
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This technique has been a tremendous success over the past few years, and
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one amendment that you may allow room for is that if your Steven tests you
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or does something dumb like not follow up the next day. The makeup effort
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has to be huge for you to give him a second chance. One reader
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of this book blocked a guy because he ghosted for two days. He then
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sent her a message on social media begging for a second chance. He had
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reservations picked out and cash apt gas money to prove he was super serious about
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not wasting her time. When she arrived, he had flowers and explained in
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detail the why of the situation that kept him from following through. Initially,
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life does happen, unexpected things come up, but mercy isn't just given.
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It must be earned. If you block a man or blow him off because
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he didn't live up to his word during the pre date, then it's on
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him to go above and beyond to win that second shot. Make him hunt
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you down and challenge him to sweep you off your feet. Anything else than
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the door remain shut. Day zero recap. Do you have the confidence to
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do what Callie did? You may think that's easy, or you may be
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nervous and unsure if your veriable skills are on par to flirt with a stranger.
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Let's rewind and walk you through this as slowly as Floyd Mayweather reading Hamlet,
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Step one the exchange recap. It doesn't matter where you meet a man
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or who that man happens to be. Chapter seven of men Don't Love Women
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like You showed Spartan Phoenix in three specific scenarios, and this here we have
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Spartan Calli meeting her guy at an ordinary place. Randomly. Every time you
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go outside, you create opportunities to meet new men. Every time you go
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on a social media app, you create opportunities to meet new men. What
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does it mean to manifest? You're not praying something good happens. You are
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living in the now of something wonderful already happening. There will be times when
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men fall in your lap. There will be times when men are merely within
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your range. Typicals only talk to men that talk to them, which is
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why they will only manifest the same types. Settle Dick Spartans are in alignment.
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Your body will give you a clear sign that it's time to make a
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move. What sign is that, specifically attraction. If you see that person
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and they jot your system, then you go for it. If you come
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across some account online that gives you pause, you go for it, no
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matter if it's verbally like CALLI with a joke or observation, or if it's
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a simple eye fuck that will make him come to you, action must be
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taken. Seducing men is never as hard as the average woman tries to make
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it out to be basicas may get courage once in a blue moon, and
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they fail because they try to seduce while nervous with low vibration energy. Spartans
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are high vibrational creatures that attract on the goddess level. When you don't fear
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rejection. Confidence comes easy when your attitude is watch how I hypnotize this little
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boy. It projects outwardly and any man across from you will pick up on
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those pheromones. The only thing that has held you back from getting what you
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wanted was the thought of what if he doesn't like me? That negativity has
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been erased, so what else is there to fear? There is no embarrassment
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to be had when you talk to men, so the real you, the
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confident you will always shine. The circumstances may not be ideal, but you
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must not buckle. There will be most likely other people around, strangers or
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friends. You may be several feet away from one another and forced to step
26:53
out of your comfort zone and get closer. Be ready, but don't force.
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Know that a path will open up if you are meant to talk to
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each other. Calli's path was blocked by a phone distraction as well as him
27:08
being several feet away. She didn't walk away. She let the universe bend
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to her will. Calli eventually found an opening to get his attention, and
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that's all You will need, a clear path to work your magic. I'm
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more of a mysterious spartan gl so I'll just lay back and wait for guys
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who I can I fuck? Cut the bullshit. You cannot be overly reliant
27:34
on I Fuck's and traditional introductions. Know what opportunity looks like and take it.
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If there's an opening where you can walk over to him or call attention
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to yourself in order to get him to come to you, follow your instincts
27:48
and trust in your power. You will attract men, but that doesn't mean
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everyone that you want will notice you, walk up to you and exchange numbers.
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Get caught up in the typical world of waiting for a man to move
28:03
first. Ask your universe to deliver, and it will deliver. But you
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cannot be so shy that you stand back and let an opportunity slip away because
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it wasn't delivered two inches from your face. Spartan snatch opportunity. They don't
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wait for further signs. The exchange of numbers sets the tone for the follow
28:26
up conversation. Be confident in your initial conversation, as it will be the
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first impression you project and give you something to call back to later on.
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In Calli's situation, she was able to call back that he was looking good
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in his suit and had his face buried in his phone. She noticed the
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details and used them to get her prey open. Be in the moment.
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Also, avoid lingering around no matter where. You meet a man at a
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party where you won't be leaving a bar where they are buying you rounds online,
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typing back and forth in an app. Get in your flirting, ask
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the small questions and either lead him to take your number or you take his
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number. Don't hang out. I've seen too many women end up going home
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with guys from the bar, kissing a guy in a car after a party.
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Don't get too close too soon because your guard may drop. You will
29:22
become comfortable and real dating never happens no matter where you are escape. Excuse
29:30
yourself after your drink and go to the restroom. Excuse yourself after a conversation
29:34
and pretend to spot a friends you need to go mingle with. Excuse yourself
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from the message chat and tell him you need to log out and finish up
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whatever. It doesn't matter the excuse, just find an exit. The goal
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is to get in and get out and save yourself as a mystery to be
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unwrapped on a date. Step two the call recap. Most of you will
30:03
have your number taken and be in the position where you have to wait for
30:07
the man to call or text you first. This step still applies if a
30:14
guy texts you a few hours later telling you that he was glad to have
30:18
met you, text back and tell him the same, but understand the goal
30:22
is to transition him to a phone call, follow up, and ask if
30:26
he's free to talk later on. This is where so many women make a
30:30
crucial mistake. They continue texting back and forth all day because it's not as
30:37
nerve racking as being on the phone. You must talk to him verbally,
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not electronically, before you actually agree to go on a date. There is
30:45
no text text text, Let's meet here emoji emoji emoji bullshit. You aren't
30:52
some basica on a blind date happy to show up to somewhere with a stranger.
30:56
You aren't desperate to where you say yes and go out with any guy
31:00
that's cute and offers. You are a spartan. Your time must be earned,
31:07
and these men can only earn that right by going through this day's zero
31:11
screening stage. Texting is a horrible way to leave an impression with a new
31:17
person because you can't read the tone. Most of the time, the two
31:21
of you are assuming based on your own ideas of how those words look on
31:25
screen. Unlike your friends, you don't know personality enough to read sarcasm or
31:32
jokes. Therefore, he can turn you off quickly due to you misreading flirting
31:37
as insulting or misreading a question as an assumption. Again, it doesn't matter
31:44
what form your messaging him texts, bumble tender, or the like. Get
31:48
off that texting ship as soon as you can by simply asking him to call.
31:55
Men are just as nervous as you are when first reaching out to tell
31:59
him to hit you later can translate to you being too busy for him because
32:02
you're not really interested. He doesn't know if you are brushing him off or
32:07
being serious about talking later. Therefore, you have to take control of the
32:12
situation and be specific. If you want him to call you, give him
32:15
a time and follow up that you will be waiting, not in a commanding
32:21
way, but in a happy, excited way by adding a meme or emoji
32:24
at the end so he knows you're not gaming him. If you have a
32:29
schedule where you would prefer to call him, tell him that again the fear
32:34
is gone, use your mouth and be direct. Always remember to have a
32:39
time set and agreed upon. Too many people leave it open ended, and
32:43
miscommunication occurs because you didn't check to see if he was free when you were
32:47
free. Two missed calls later and it all falls apart because you think he's
32:52
playing games, when in reality it's on you for not specifying the plan.
32:59
That may sound like doing too much, but too much of what winning.
33:04
Get what you want and take control while doing it so there is no room
33:07
for error. If he doesn't pick up, leave a message it's not that
33:13
serious where you text after you call him like a psycho, or flip out
33:16
with an attitude because he wasn't around when he said he would be free.
33:21
Remember, ego sabotages you, and pride is a weak emotion. Let go
33:27
of attitude and anxiety. Shoot your shot and allow it to play out patiently.
33:34
Alternatively, if the man calls you without texting first, good. This
33:38
means you don't have to train him. You may feel as if you need
33:43
time to get your mind right and your goal visualized. Spartans don't run,
33:49
they improvise. Realize that any man you meet could call in two hours or
33:53
in two days. Know what you want to say in case of either situation.
34:00
Superior warrior always expects the unexpected, the same rules supply regardless of who
34:06
does the calling. Put him at ease. Recon date bait. The initial
34:12
date setting call shouldn't last more than thirty minutes at most. If you find
34:16
yourself on the phone laughing and carrying on, snatch yourself away because you're doing
34:22
too much. The point is to find out enough to know that he's not
34:25
some creep, that he's employed, and that he's sane enough to meet in
34:30
public. There is no need for long conversation at this stage, but you
34:36
won't be able to help it if you click. If the two of you
34:39
are hitting it off. Neither. We'll want to get off the phone,
34:43
but you have to exit in thirty minutes or less. Men have their own
34:47
game plan. They get in your ear, flirt, put you at ease,
34:52
and then get real familiar. Here's where that has benefited me. By
34:58
the time I once got off three read our phone conversation with this girl I
35:01
met the day before. We had bonded so much that all I had to
35:06
say is I need to see you as soon as possible. This chemistry is
35:10
crazy. It wasn't chemistry. It was my dick to her. It was
35:15
a guy actually being blown away enough to want to skip work and see her,
35:20
and that made her feel like hot shit. It wasn't so much my
35:23
game. It was her ego that led her to meet up with me the
35:28
next day. No date, no real recon on me, but real sex.
35:34
Be smarter. Don't let a man lullaby you with phone boning before you
35:38
go on an actual date. In terms of the questions you ask and the
35:44
answers you get, they won't all be picture perfect like Steven's responses. You
35:49
may meet a man who may not have a great job or doesn't want to
35:52
tell you what he does. It's very important to know these things before you
35:57
go on a date, so don't be afraid to press. No woman should
36:01
agree to meet out in public with Tavon who does a bit of everything.
36:07
If your friend were to try to file a missing person's report, it's better
36:10
that she knows that you were going out with Tavon who worked at General Motors.
36:15
I get money or I work from my uncle. Isn't a respectable response
36:21
position? Does he have one residency? Where does he live and with who?
36:27
Not all men will be truthful, but at least do your part.
36:30
You may get a man who has children. You have to decide if that
36:35
is a deal breaker for you right then and there. My friend told me
36:38
how she dated a guy who met all her qualifications and then some, but
36:44
he had one drawback, a young child. He looks so good that she
36:49
revamped her views on men with kids, like I'll play step mom. He's
36:52
that fine. After weeks of dating, she realized that it was always going
36:58
to be a deal breaker. Her lust for him didn't change the fact that
37:01
she was not about the my man has kids by other women life. She
37:07
wasted weeks when she should have kept it real. The moment she said he
37:10
had a son. It's okay to have selfish standards, and it's even better
37:15
to own up to them starting out un day zero. If you front for
37:20
a man and lie to yourself to make him work, it will eventually catch
37:25
up to you, causing you to back out after you put in this work.
37:30
Be honest with yourself. What if you are the one with children and
37:35
he does his own rican. In my book Solving Single, I talked about
37:39
dating with children, and I stand by the motion that you don't have to
37:44
volunteer that information until he earns a first date. However, it's never good
37:50
to start out with a lie if directly asked, if he brings it up
37:53
during this first call, keep it real and give him the opportunity to back
37:59
out that that you would want at this stage. No need to get defensive
38:02
and say yes I do. Is that going to be a problem, because
38:07
if he agrees and follows through with this date, it's not. Some men
38:12
will lie to your face and say they don't mind, then fall back using
38:15
other excuses. Leave room for that level of bullshit. If he chooses not
38:21
to call you back to officially set the date, good, it means he
38:23
didn't want to waste your time. Men won't always speak up, so allow
38:30
their actions to communicate what's real. The final part is the date bait.
38:37
Men don't always ask to take you out by default, because we live in
38:42
a world where guys realize they don't have to court for pussy the same way
38:46
men of the past did. As I explained last chapter, it is not
38:51
that modern men won't date, it's that they would be foolish to spend money
38:55
when you may be a come over and chill type of girl. How does
39:00
a man know that you aren't fast food pussy. The only way is to
39:05
test you by seeing what you allow in terms of treatment. As noted earlier,
39:09
typical women allow these good looking, gainfully employed men to get away with
39:15
half ass dates. Other women have lowered the bar. In response, you
39:22
must raise yours that much higher. This doesn't mean you offer to take him
39:27
out and go Dutch. It means you establish your standards as a woman that
39:30
only goes on traditional dates. If he offers to cook or says places are
39:37
closed around your city, pivot and tell him to get creative, as you
39:42
don't go over to guy's places. Men respect standards, so never back down.
39:47
Just to make things easy for him. Either he meets your bar or
39:52
he doesn't get beyond the pre date CALLI used her sensuality to tease her prey
39:58
into jumping at a chance to take her out. Depending on the type of
40:02
woman you are, there are literally dozens of ways you can date bait.
40:07
Assertive. Check your texts. I'm about to send you the place you're taking
40:12
me this weekend, Witty, describe your perfect date with me so I can
40:16
tell you the day and time this will happen. Sassy, I hope you're
40:22
not one of those fools that think you are going to get my nookie with
40:25
Hulu and a home cooked meal. Whoever you are, let it come out
40:30
naturally. Never shy away from establishing your standards. In the end, if
40:36
he doesn't want to take you to that place you suggest, doesn't give you
40:39
his own suggestion, or acts as if he's going to be too busy to
40:44
go out for anything other than a quick drink or a house pop up,
40:47
then he is not the man for you. I repeat. If he doesn't
40:52
respond to the date bait by actually setting up a date, then his contact
40:57
information leaves your phone that night. Step three. The bait recap. There
41:06
will be women who find a man they really like and get over eager while
41:12
waiting to test this out. But he hasn't called for me to do any
41:15
of this. How long do I wait for him? If you meet a
41:20
man and give him your number but he never hits you up, he doesn't
41:22
want you. If you text him and he never responds back, he doesn't
41:28
want you. If he waits a week to hit you up and does so
41:30
at two a m He wants you pussy, but he doesn't want you.
41:35
If you go to call him and he doesn't answer or return that call,
41:38
saya with me. He doesn't want your ass. This isn't about making every
41:45
man take an interest in you. It's about exploiting the interest that a man
41:50
has from the start. You can't win over a man that doesn't see you
41:55
as his type. Some males will flirt with you, that talk, even
42:00
ask for your number, but never follow up. Spartans don't sit around and
42:05
sulk about what went wrong. The proof is in the effort. If all
42:08
the signs pointed to him being different, then this is the biggest sign of
42:13
them all. He's not the one. Do not dwell. There are too
42:19
many men out there. You can't let the ones who don't respond be a
42:22
speed bump. Day zero ends with you setting that first date. If he
42:30
doesn't make it to that part, then he doesn't count. Now that you
42:34
know the steps to getting to the first date, let's get into the Day one activity