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An Unlikely Affair: Who Blocked Bravo? · Untraditionally Lala

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: Hi Amber, Hi Lola, Welcome to an Unlikely Affair. I
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: like it better when you're in front of me, next
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: to me, touching me. Ooh, like in your bed, touching you,
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: just like where you're not through a screen. But I
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: have to say I was like overwhelmed by the amount
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: of love that we got from the last episode same.
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: It was wild how how into it people were and
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: so many people saying this gave me happy tears. I
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: cried at the end, which is exactly what we wanted.
• 0:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's exactly the purpose of this podcast. I mean,
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: not to make people cry, but like no.
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: But to understand the bond and how high the stakes are.
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: That that was always my intention behind it and just
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: showing how far we've come. And I also I can
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: never stop being myself. So for people who listen to
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: like the first and second episode, like I believe in
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: strong foreplay, like don't just put it in right, It's
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: only going to get juicier. There's only you know, more
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: and more memories. And I don't know about you, but
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: there are times where I feel like I disassociate and
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: then I'll drive past like a certain place and I'll
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: be like, oh my god, I remember this one time.
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: Like I've kind of put up such a wall, a
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: mental shield of like I don't remember a whole lot
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: during that time, but then something triggers it, or like
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: something you'll say, I'm like, oh my gosh, I do
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: remember that.
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I have the same experience, not as much now
• 1:45
  Speaker 2: living in Montana, but because my house it like the
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: house on Mulholland I lived two minutes from, so I
• 1:53
  Speaker 2: would pass that house multiple times a day and like
• 1:58
  Speaker 2: just ran and sometimes the thoughts wouldn't come. But then
• 2:01
  Speaker 2: all of a sudden, I'd be driving and I would
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: see the street and I was like, it would literally
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: take my breath away, because I do have so many
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: memories in that house.
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: Right, the one that I lived into.
• 2:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Yeah, that was the nesting house. That was the
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: house that we both like when we separated, the kids
• 2:17
  Speaker 2: stayed there, and then we both went in and out
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: of this apartment in Studio City.
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: Can I tell you something about that house? I always
• 2:26
  Speaker 1: fucking hated it.
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: I think we all did. Why did you hate it?
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: Well, originally I thought that I just hated the house
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: and it needed an overhaul. And then we had an overhaul,
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: and then I was like maybe if I changed this,
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: and I was like, oh, it's just the energy of
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: the house. The house is great, it's the energy within it. Yeah.
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: I think I had that experience the first time that
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: I lived on my own with the girls, I had
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: that same experience. It really affects you, like energy. I'm
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: such a impath and sensitive person to energy. Like I
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: can walk into a room just like I'm either really
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: drawn to a person or I'm like, Okay, I got
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: to go on the other side of the room because
• 3:05
  Speaker 2: this person is giving like not good vibes.
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: Right you and I relate in that in that way.
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: Like I can walk into something as simple as like
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: a mommy and me class and my mom will be like,
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: are you gonna go back to it? And I'm like no,
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: and she's like why, And I'm like, didn't like the energy,
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: didn't like the Functionuy, I just don't want to, Like,
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: I just don't want to be there. You didn't like
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: the songs, No, songs were fine, it was just the
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: energy from the room. I'm like, we're not going back.
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: I didn't dig it.
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you know that's funny. I felt that way when
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: I lived in Camrio and my kids did It's really
• 3:38
  Speaker 2: interesting if you listen to kids and how they they're
• 3:41
  Speaker 2: just like if you take them into a house, they'll
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: tell you right away. And I think kids are so
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: in tune with their nervous systems that they'll tell you
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: right away whether like and it's true. It's like you
• 3:50
  Speaker 2: got to Parks.
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: Stunning though I had never been like in person, so
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: I don't know the energy, but like looking at your
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: Instagram and it being like the what's that noise? Oh, Lisa,
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: my mom's here, Lisa, Hey, Lisa, I just can't. People
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: are like, do you want a third child? I'm like,
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: I have one. I have one. She's a grown ass
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: woman that I have to move.
• 4:15
  Speaker 2: Come on, be nice to your mom.
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: I'm so nice to her, I know.
• 4:19
  Speaker 2: But you're so lucky. You're so lucky that you have
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: that person like by your side. Now I get it.
• 4:24
  Speaker 2: It's a mother daughter relationship. And I have my own
• 4:27
  Speaker 2: shit with my mom like we all do. But like,
• 4:30
  Speaker 2: I love my mom, you love your mom.
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: So I'm the luckiest girl in the world. We all
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: know this, whatever, but there are times where I'm like,
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: in this whole you know, in the bigger picture of
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: my mom moving out and helping me, you know, take
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: care of ocean and raise her. When she thought she
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: was coming out to just remedy a situation in her
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: mothering me and getting me to, you know, be an
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: independent person. She then loves independence if she just like
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: transferred her own independence onto me and now looks at
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: me when a waiter comes over and is like, what
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: would you like to eat? And she looks at me
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: like what do I want to eat? Like, I don't know, bitch,
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: what do you want to eat?
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: We need to get Lisa out of the house. We
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: need to get her out of the house. If she's
• 5:18
  Speaker 2: open to dating, I think that would be like.
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: Just no desire to date anybody? Do you lease? Yeah?
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: But how but she's never dated before? So how do
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: you know that? Like, it's sometimes it's like you have
• 5:29
  Speaker 2: to we have to put yourself out there, and maybe
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: she realizes like, oh yeah, I really didn't like it,
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: But maybe she ends up loving it, and then you never, like,
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: then you're really going to have a kid to look
• 5:39
  Speaker 2: out for.
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: Oh geez, no, Amber, you're giving me a whole new
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: set of stressors.
• 5:45
  Speaker 2: Okay, wait, so I you were talking before about having
• 5:50
  Speaker 2: these images and I actually had one that I don't
• 5:54
  Speaker 2: know why I made the biggest Well I do know
• 5:57
  Speaker 2: why I made the biggest deal about this. Do you
• 5:59
  Speaker 2: remember when you were in the house and you let
• 6:02
  Speaker 2: London put press on glue on nails when she was
• 6:05
  Speaker 2: like ten. You probably don't even remember because it wasn't
• 6:08
  Speaker 2: like you're probably like you're that was a really stupid
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: thing to get mad over. I'll never forget when London
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: came home and she's like, Lala, let me put on
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: glue on nails, And I was so freakin mad at you.
• 6:21
  Speaker 2: I was like infuriated, And in that moment, I realized, well, now,
• 6:25
  Speaker 2: looking back, I was just looking for any reason to
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: be upset with you. I really was, Well, that makes
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: total sense, of course, No, it doesn't make total sense,
• 6:36
  Speaker 2: like I should. That was like such a stupid thing
• 6:37
  Speaker 2: to get mad about.
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: There are a lot of things that I look back
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: on now that I'm a mom and I go, wow,
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: I really put her through a lot, and I should
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: have known better. I should have had more respect. But
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: I was deep in my alcoholism. I wasn't a mom.
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: I looked at you as someone who you were the
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: mom of those kids, and those were you know, the
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: greatest loves of his life. You had given him something
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: that I had. I you always felt up here and
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: I didn't feel like I could. I felt intimidated by
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: you very much, so you did of course, yeah, you know,
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: you you had actual talent. That was intimidating to me.
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: You know, I was just some girl on reality TV.
• 7:33
  Speaker 1: That was a lot of pressure.
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: But I told you the other day, with what you
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: do and under now like being like spending a lot
• 7:42
  Speaker 2: more time with you being a lot of people don't
• 7:46
  Speaker 2: know this. You have to have talent to be in
• 7:48
  Speaker 2: reality and I didn't know that in the beginning, right
• 7:51
  Speaker 2: as an as an actress. I remember when reality started
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: really popping off, especially when you came on the screen,
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: and like you know, and then I also hated reality
• 8:02
  Speaker 2: probably for that reason too. I mean I think I
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: had watched maybe like Southern Charm or something like really
• 8:08
  Speaker 2: you know like that, but that takes a lot of
• 8:10
  Speaker 2: talent too. Like you have this like personality that is
• 8:15
  Speaker 2: a lot of people wish they had, Like you have
• 8:18
  Speaker 2: this confidence, this this like spontaneous fiery attitude and also
• 8:24
  Speaker 2: a lot of love. Right, Like once people really get
• 8:27
  Speaker 2: to know you and they peel back the onions, Like,
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: I think that's where you and I are very similar
• 8:32
  Speaker 2: in a lot of ways. Right, you have this very
• 8:34
  Speaker 2: tough exterior, but you have heart, and when you had ocean,
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: you became not just this fierce woman. You became a
• 8:43
  Speaker 2: mama bear, which is like beautiful and a lot of
• 8:45
  Speaker 2: people can relate to that.
• 8:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think so too. There is a shift that happens,
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: and I appreciate you saying that reality TV is a talent.
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: I think as I get older and I'm sober and
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: I look at what I do, I have more of
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: an appreciation for the art of making reality TV because
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: not just anyone can do it. And I appreciate other
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: people where I watch their shows and they're making reality
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: TV living their lives and I'm like, you fucking crushed.
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: Like i just finished Real Housewives of Salt Lake and
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: I'm like, this is so good. You all crushed it
• 9:24
  Speaker 1: and we're all just like authentic and told your truth.
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: I look at reality TV very differently now that I
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: have a fresh perspective on it, if that makes sense,
• 9:33
  Speaker 1: because I took a break and then coming back, I'm like, oh,
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: I'm a little rusty, Like I actually was pretty.
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: Damn good at what I did. Yeah, but that just
• 9:40
  Speaker 2: shows you it's an art, really is an art. And
• 9:43
  Speaker 2: you had to be quick on your feet, and you
• 9:44
  Speaker 2: had to, like, you know, you have that talent of
• 9:46
  Speaker 2: being able to spit it back and be quick on
• 9:48
  Speaker 2: your toes where some people just don't. You're like for me,
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: I personal, I'm like, oh, damn, I should have said
• 9:53
  Speaker 2: that like three days after the situation that happened.
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, instead, I go, Damn, I shouldn't have said that.
• 9:59
  Speaker 1: I should have watched way.
• 10:09
  Speaker 2: So I'll never forget the first time you popped up
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: on vander Pump when we were watching Vanner Pump one
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: night in bed.
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: Well, you know, after that, Bravo was blocked on all
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: of your TVs.
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: Damn yeah, are you serious?
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah, like you couldn't watch Oh my gosh, like codes
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: on it and stuff to watch that channel. Oh my god,
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: that's crazy. Did you know that?
• 10:34
  Speaker 2: No, but I didn't even watch Bravo. I wasn't even
• 10:37
  Speaker 2: watching Bravo at that time. Well, even when I knew
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: you guys were together, I still wasn't watching this show. Well,
• 10:45
  Speaker 2: first of all, let's be honest. The show went on
• 10:47
  Speaker 2: for how many seasons? And I felt, well, it's still
• 10:49
  Speaker 2: going on. I felt like, oh damn, I have like
• 10:51
  Speaker 2: five seasons to catch up with. But then it was
• 10:54
  Speaker 2: like the pain of I don't even know what hapen
• 11:00
  Speaker 2: on vander Pump Rolls. All I know is people are like,
• 11:02
  Speaker 2: you should watch it. I was like, apps fusolutely not.
• 11:06
  Speaker 2: I'm not watching vander pump Roles because I'm literally living
• 11:10
  Speaker 2: in it right like I'm living the reality of the
• 11:13
  Speaker 2: show very much so. But I will never forget when
• 11:17
  Speaker 2: he saw you on that screen the first night, What.
• 11:20
  Speaker 1: Do you mean.
• 11:23
  Speaker 2: When we were together and you came on the screen,
• 11:28
  Speaker 2: you were you were a like.
• 11:31
  Speaker 1: A waiter or what is it called a hostess.
• 11:34
  Speaker 2: You were a hostess. He you came on the screen
• 11:37
  Speaker 2: and we were lying in bed together and I was
• 11:40
  Speaker 2: not paying attention, doing something else on my phone, probably
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: playing like some word cross game. And he was like,
• 11:48
  Speaker 2: oh my god, I'll never forget that. He's like, oh
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: my god, I have to get a general with that girl.
• 11:55
  Speaker 2: Very quickly after that, he was taking a work trip
• 11:59
  Speaker 2: to New York. And I'm very familiar in the ways
• 12:04
  Speaker 2: that someone goes outside their marriage. It's like when you've
• 12:07
  Speaker 2: lived through these patterns you recognize the choreography of betrayal, right,
• 12:14
  Speaker 2: So it wasn't a shock.
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: It was just for me.
• 12:17
  Speaker 2: I guess it was confirmation what my gut had already
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: told me, but my brain was telling me another story.
• 12:24
  Speaker 2: But the confirmation for me was the picture he posted
• 12:28
  Speaker 2: on Instagram of a YouTube together. So that was pretty
• 12:33
  Speaker 2: much like I kept track for so many months just
• 12:38
  Speaker 2: through Instagram. Like it's so easy to like catch people
• 12:41
  Speaker 2: doing I mean, not smart people. Anyways, I didn't.
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: I didn't catch anything.
• 12:46
  Speaker 2: But you probably didn't give a fuck. You didn't give
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: a fuck at that point.
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: Well, and that's what's so hard is when people would
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: ask me, like how did you not know? It's like
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: because I loved him gone so much that I didn't.
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: I think subconsciously I didn't give a fuck where he was,
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: didn't care.
• 13:03
  Speaker 2: And even now, it's funny, that's how I felt as
• 13:05
  Speaker 2: the wife of course my house. Every time I knew
• 13:09
  Speaker 2: he was coming back, I had I was a ball
• 13:11
  Speaker 2: of anxiety and I just it was just nerves and
• 13:15
  Speaker 2: panic and like I just did not like knowing that
• 13:20
  Speaker 2: he was coming back. I loved knowing he was leaving,
• 13:22
  Speaker 2: so I didn't care. I didn't care, So you just
• 13:26
  Speaker 2: got the stuff that you wanted. You got that that
• 13:29
  Speaker 2: tank filled up.
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: What do you mean, the stuff, like actual things? Yeah,
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: like the actual stuff. And then well, at the beginning.
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: You have to remember, at the beginning, we were always together.
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: And I think, I think it's my karma. I think
• 13:44
  Speaker 1: I made a deal with the devil. I think, uh,
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: I liked the stuff. Anytime my gut would speak to me,
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: I would drink more and numb it. I think there's
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: so many things that I truly chose not to see
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: because the moment that it became clear, I would drink
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: until enough was enough and I got sober, and then
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: I you know, I continued to work throughout our time together,
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: and I made my own money. So I stopped caring
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: about Chanel bags and Louis Vuitton bags because I could
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: go get that on my own. I stopped caring about
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: the private jets because I was on it with him
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: and that was not fun. I stopped caring about being
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: on boats because I was with him, and that was
• 14:29
  Speaker 1: not fun. I just wanted to feel peace. And I
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: don't mean that as an insult, because we had many
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: good times together. We were just not meant to be
• 14:40
  Speaker 1: in a partnership ever, and we thrived as friends. That's
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: what I always really appreciated.
• 14:49
  Speaker 2: I knew, I felt that One thing that I would
• 14:51
  Speaker 2: say that I was probably a little more envious observing
• 14:54
  Speaker 2: your guys's relationship from Afar is that you guys had
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: this like a deep rooted friendship. We had something else.
• 15:02
  Speaker 2: We definitely had something else, and I don't I'm not
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: quite sure what that is, but I saw you guys
• 15:06
  Speaker 2: have this this like ebb and flow. That was like, really,
• 15:12
  Speaker 2: I wouldn't say it was beautiful at the time, but
• 15:14
  Speaker 2: like now looking back, you know, because I don't want
• 15:18
  Speaker 2: to say, you know, there's something very likable in the
• 15:23
  Speaker 2: beginning about this person. Oh yeah, right, take away the
• 15:27
  Speaker 2: stuff like take away, it's a personality I think that
• 15:30
  Speaker 2: I was very very attracted to. I also came into
• 15:35
  Speaker 2: the relationship at seventeen, when I first met him in
• 15:39
  Speaker 2: New York when I was working on all my children.
• 15:43
  Speaker 2: It was the personality. It was like he was what
• 15:45
  Speaker 2: I kind of always wanted to be like in terms
• 15:48
  Speaker 2: of his charismatic, being able to tell stories, be funny.
• 15:55
  Speaker 2: But then like over time you learn this is why
• 15:59
  Speaker 2: dating someone for A second is important because you really,
• 16:02
  Speaker 2: you know, when the mask comes down and you see
• 16:05
  Speaker 2: people for who they are, or does the good outweigh
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: the bad? No, And that's not always the case.
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: No. And also because we we had a question about it,
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: says La La. You have mentioned never truly being in love.
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: How did you stay and have a child? And that
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: goes back to what you just said. I'm still and
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: I feel guilty ever questioning this because we talked about
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: this episode one that Ocean is just the greatest thing
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: that ever happened to me, and I feel like the
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: sole purpose of that entire experience with him was to
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: get Ocean here. You know, she was just meant to
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: be on this planet as my baby. But I think
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: because there were such high highs and such low lows
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: and there was never anything in between. And you know,
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: still the reason why I feel like I started started
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: putting myself out there, you know, I want to say,
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: like nine months to a year after the breakup, I
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: kind of did that and then retreated because I noticed
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: I was attracting men who did that to me, and
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: I was like, this is a me problem. I am
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: attracting men who take me to you know, the bottom
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: of the ocean and then into fucking outer space within
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: a matter of moments. And I'm addicted to that, and
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: that is that is toxic. And we have to figure
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: out what's going in with what's going on within our
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: own selves to say, why do I why is this
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: attractive to me? Why do I think that this is normal?
• 17:40
  Speaker 1: Why am I getting off on this?
• 17:42
  Speaker 2: One hundred percent? I can relate to that. I think
• 17:44
  Speaker 2: I was in the beginning seeking emotional security in a
• 17:48
  Speaker 2: place that was was not I don't want to stay safe,
• 17:52
  Speaker 2: but it was just like the emotional security that wasn't there, right.
• 17:56
  Speaker 2: I was trying to find that in someone else because
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: I didn't have that in myself, right, And I think
• 18:02
  Speaker 2: that's where you have to have a lot of compassion
• 18:05
  Speaker 2: and then eventually you realize that that's actually an addiction, right.
• 18:09
  Speaker 2: Addiction just doesn't mean chugging a glass of vodka or
• 18:14
  Speaker 2: a bottle of vodka, or taking pills or gambling or
• 18:17
  Speaker 2: having sex or shopping or overeating. There's like this psychological
• 18:22
  Speaker 2: addiction that I have had experience, and I didn't have
• 18:26
  Speaker 2: the tools then because when I was so young and
• 18:30
  Speaker 2: I needed that. I really think my experience. I truly
• 18:34
  Speaker 2: believe to my core that experience and the experience that
• 18:38
  Speaker 2: I'm still going through on a daily basis, is one
• 18:42
  Speaker 2: of my sole purposes in this life, Like I really needed.
• 18:46
  Speaker 2: It's teaching me so much every single day, every single day.
• 18:52
  Speaker 1: Well, yeah, because no matter, no matter what, you go
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: through these phases of life, and every time you think
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: you've got it figured out, though, the universe knocks you
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: off of your toes to teach you another lesson, to
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: humble you, to get you to where you need to be.
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: And I think you saying that it's it's also the
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: power of reflection after sobriety.
• 19:17
  Speaker 2: Mm hmmm, it's interesting. I did that for two years
• 19:24
  Speaker 2: without a program, and my experience was completely different. Did
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: you ever like to stop drinking for a period of
• 19:31
  Speaker 2: time without using a program?
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: No. The first time that I stopped drinking and went
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: into a program, I was still smoking weed. Which then
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: the second round, where I've been sober now for over
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: seven years, I had to go back because I felt
• 19:44
  Speaker 1: like I made a mockery of the program. I'm like,
• 19:46
  Speaker 1: these women were working so hard to stay sober and
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: I was smoking weed. It was like an amendsa had
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: to make.
• 19:53
  Speaker 2: Sobriety is a journey, right, and it's an individual journey.
• 19:57
  Speaker 2: Some people just want to put down the drink, or
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: some people just want to put down the weed and
• 20:02
  Speaker 2: keep drinking. Like you had to do what's best for you.
• 20:06
  Speaker 1: I don't think that's a sober person.
• 20:07
  Speaker 2: Then no, no, no, I mean not in the program that
• 20:10
  Speaker 2: we work, right, there's other programs that people work in
• 20:14
  Speaker 2: this specific twelve step programs. You it's any mind altering substance.
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah, anyway, what were you saying. I don't know. I
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: cut you off. I need to stop doing that because
• 20:27
  Speaker 1: you're doing something about Amber never cut which I always do.
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: I need to work on that. She forgets everything. I'm like,
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: how do you not remember? How do you not literally
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: it was on the tip of your tongue. She's like
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: ninety seven with fucking amnesia.
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: But let me tell you, yes, I one hundred percent true.
• 20:46
  Speaker 2: But that also has to deal with just like having
• 20:49
  Speaker 2: too much going on in my brain. I do have
• 20:52
  Speaker 2: to say, I've been taking fish oil and I've noticed
• 20:55
  Speaker 2: the biggest difference in my recall, Like my recall time
• 20:59
  Speaker 2: the time laps might be like a day and then
• 21:01
  Speaker 2: it's gone down to like within ten minutes. I'm like,
• 21:04
  Speaker 2: oh that's it.
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: Well, that's better.
• 21:08
  Speaker 2: And I'm writing. I'm writing everything down. Remember you said,
• 21:11
  Speaker 2: you're like, write it down. If you have something to say,
• 21:14
  Speaker 2: write it down. And I have I write now. I
• 21:16
  Speaker 2: write everything. I mean, my notes in my phone are
• 21:18
  Speaker 2: just so freaking disorganized, But the really important ones I
• 21:22
  Speaker 2: always pin, which I love.
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: I love that feature. Oh wow, you know how to
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: pin things on your phone? Yeah wow, I'm engrasped. I'm
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: very impressed by.
• 21:32
  Speaker 2: And do you know how to lock a note?
• 21:33
  Speaker 1: No, you don't.
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: You don't know how to lock a note. I can't
• 21:36
  Speaker 2: wait till I see you next time. I have so
• 21:37
  Speaker 2: much to teach you.
• 21:39
  Speaker 1: See No, I don't know how to lock a note.
• 21:41
  Speaker 1: I need to figure out. So Ocean's iPad is connected
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: to my phone, and I started panicking one day because
• 21:50
  Speaker 1: she pulled up photos and it was just her and
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: like her friends throughout like the last year. But you know,
• 21:56
  Speaker 1: I have a lot of stuff on there. She's seen
• 21:59
  Speaker 1: me naked million times. I'm not really worried if she
• 22:01
  Speaker 1: sees like a photo of me naked, but if I
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: get a nude from somebody, I don't need to do.
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: I don't need to so speaking of I need to
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: lock a lot of things. Yeah, but she's grounded from
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: her iPad right now because she was a massive oh
• 22:18
  Speaker 1: amber I was. I was so La La from vander
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: Pump Rules on her ass last night.
• 22:26
  Speaker 2: Would she do?
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: She had her dolls in this stroller and all of
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: the sudden I hear it just like slamming down the
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: stairs and she's at the top of the stairs and
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, are you okay? What happened?
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: She goes, I pushed it down the stairs and I go,
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: why would you do that? And she goes because I
• 22:44
  Speaker 1: wanted to So I told her like, that was not okay,
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: and then she got so lippy with me. So I
• 22:50
  Speaker 1: took away all her roomy costumes that I had just
• 22:53
  Speaker 1: gotten for her because yeah, you know, she was asking
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: about them since you've been here, yeah, from K pop
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: Demon Hunter. So she lost those. Then she kept getting
• 23:04
  Speaker 1: lippy with me, so I and obviously she lost the
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: stroller as well. I was like, we're done. And then
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: then I had to say, you talk one more time,
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: and I'm putting hot sauce in your mouth. I bluff.
• 23:15
  Speaker 1: I bluffal up right, and she goes, if when you
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: put hot sauce in my mouth, I can't wait, I'm
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: gonna swallow it and then become a fire breathing dragon
• 23:24
  Speaker 1: and light you on fire.
• 23:25
  Speaker 2: I was like, oh my goodness, no, So you want.
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: To know what I did? I started laughing. I go,
• 23:32
  Speaker 1: you think dragons are real? That's fine? Is that real?
• 23:37
  Speaker 2: You crushed her dreams of knowing that dragons aren't real.
• 23:41
  Speaker 2: I'm sorry. You crushed my spirit as me and may
• 23:45
  Speaker 2: have fucked up the carpet on my stairs. So I'm annoyed, okay,
• 23:49
  Speaker 2: But the most important lesson in that is that throwing
• 23:55
  Speaker 2: a baby down the stairs can really hurt that baby.
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: Did she have any like recollection of like?
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: No, because when I tell her things like that, she
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: was the mom it's not even real. I wouldn't really
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: do that. And I'm like, oh, okay, Yeah, so she
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: knows that, but thinks that she's going to become a
• 24:11
  Speaker 1: fire breathing dragon with some chilula in her gut.
• 24:15
  Speaker 2: So your laugh's on onces or consequences where you take
• 24:18
  Speaker 2: away things.
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah, And she wouldn't stop. She wouldn't stop, and so
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: then she started again, and I go, I would think
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: long and hard about what's about to come out of
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: your mouth right now, because the gymnastics bar that you
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: love so much upstairs will be gone if you say
• 24:34
  Speaker 1: one more word.
• 24:35
  Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, I can't. So when London was little,
• 24:39
  Speaker 2: she was like three, and she went through this spitting phase.
• 24:43
  Speaker 2: She would just and I was like, where the hell
• 24:47
  Speaker 2: did she pick this up? Yeah, And so finally I
• 24:49
  Speaker 2: was like, I didn't know how to I don't know
• 24:52
  Speaker 2: how to discipline her at this point. And I think
• 24:56
  Speaker 2: it was my mom that told me put apples side
• 24:59
  Speaker 2: of vinegar a score bottle, and whenever she's because it's
• 25:02
  Speaker 2: healthy for you, right, but it tastes disgusting. So whenever
• 25:05
  Speaker 2: she would do that, I would I would say, nope,
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: we're going to the refrigerator. Open your mouth, show me
• 25:10
  Speaker 2: your tongue. And I mean it was like I was
• 25:13
  Speaker 2: putting gasoline probably tastes like gasoline, but down her throat
• 25:17
  Speaker 2: and she stopped. The spitting stopped very quickly.
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: Okay, Well that I just she she hasn't lost it
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: like that for a while, and all of this sudden
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: she was just I didn't know who she was. Last
• 25:32
  Speaker 1: night kicking, throwing the tantrum, and I'm like that we
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: have not dealt with this in so long. I don't
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: understand why she's being like this. Mm hmmmmmm.
• 25:41
  Speaker 2: The demon. The demon came out and then I felt.
• 25:44
  Speaker 1: Bad because she came up and she was like, I'm sorry,
• 25:45
  Speaker 1: Mom and wanted to sleep in my bed, and I
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: was like, okay, you can get in.
• 25:49
  Speaker 2: That's okay. I mean as long as there was a consequence.
• 25:52
  Speaker 2: I mean, that's what I've learned with my kids. The
• 25:54
  Speaker 2: consequences have to be immediately. Yeah, if you delay them,
• 25:58
  Speaker 2: Like for instance, Riley had a sleep over this past weekend,
• 26:01
  Speaker 2: and I probably shouldn't have let it happened because she
• 26:04
  Speaker 2: spent all day at the mall, which I dropped her
• 26:07
  Speaker 2: off for the first time, and I was like terrified,
• 26:10
  Speaker 2: But they ended up being five, but four girls spent
• 26:13
  Speaker 2: the night the upstairs in my house. Disaster destroyed. Okay,
• 26:18
  Speaker 2: I said, eleven thirty is bedtime. I woke. I had
• 26:22
  Speaker 2: fallen asleep because I go to bed super early. It
• 26:24
  Speaker 2: was one thirty in the morning, and I heard this giggling.
• 26:27
  Speaker 2: So I came up the stairs and you hear the
• 26:31
  Speaker 2: and then the door was closed, but you could see
• 26:32
  Speaker 2: the light. I opened the door. One of the girls
• 26:37
  Speaker 2: is on a freaking ledge in one of the rooms.
• 26:39
  Speaker 2: There's like this tall ledge with a sprite in her hand.
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: A sprite. Well this has poppen one. Yeah, sprite.
• 26:47
  Speaker 2: Oh my god. They were on a sugar high and
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: they looked at me. They're like, we can't sleep. And
• 26:52
  Speaker 2: I'm like, the fucking light's on, No wonder why you can't.
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: Sleep and your face chugging sugar.
• 26:58
  Speaker 2: Yes, I said, two of you in there, two of
• 27:01
  Speaker 2: you in there. I'm like, it's one thirty five in
• 27:03
  Speaker 2: the morning. And that was it. And I was like,
• 27:05
  Speaker 2: I told Riley, and when I tell you, they just tried.
• 27:08
  Speaker 2: There was sprite bottles on my stairway when I woke
• 27:12
  Speaker 2: up this morning. Like they were like it was the
• 27:15
  Speaker 2: craziest thing. I told Riley. I said, like a frat house. Yeah, yeah, exactly.
• 27:19
  Speaker 2: I said, you guys are old enough to make a mess,
• 27:21
  Speaker 2: you're old enough to clean it up. You're old enough
• 27:23
  Speaker 2: to stay up till one thirty in the morning, you're
• 27:25
  Speaker 2: old enough to clean up the spilled. It was like
• 27:28
  Speaker 2: they had a freaking party. And I told Riley this morning,
• 27:30
  Speaker 2: I said, no more. I said, this is I'm really
• 27:33
  Speaker 2: actually disappointed because this is how you It's just so
• 27:37
  Speaker 2: disrespectful to our house. And I even said to her,
• 27:39
  Speaker 2: I said, if you had a house, would you like
• 27:43
  Speaker 2: someone to do this, if you were actually paying rent?
• 27:46
  Speaker 2: And she's like, Mom, we were just having fun. I'm like,
• 27:51
  Speaker 2: you're missing the whole point. Never mind, get in the
• 27:54
  Speaker 2: freaking car. Let's go to school.
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: What a freaking nightmare. What a nightmare?
• 28:00
  Speaker 2: I know, I can't even they're so why are kids
• 28:02
  Speaker 2: so gross and like messy? I mean, your kids are little.
• 28:05
  Speaker 2: Your kids are a little, so you're you're dealing with toys.
• 28:08
  Speaker 2: I'm dealing with like I deal with it is gross,
• 28:13
  Speaker 2: make makeup all of it. The conditioner is spilt in
• 28:19
  Speaker 2: the shower, Like you step in the shower and you're
• 28:22
  Speaker 2: like slipping, and you're like, why can't you just put
• 28:24
  Speaker 2: the freaking top on the conditioner? Literally it takes two seconds.
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I went from wanting three kids to I want
• 28:31
  Speaker 1: no kids. Just kidding.
• 28:34
  Speaker 2: I literally went downstairs and Riley made popcorn for all
• 28:36
  Speaker 2: her friends. It was like the wrapper was left on
• 28:41
  Speaker 2: the counter, the bag was left on the counter, and
• 28:45
  Speaker 2: then there was like little extra kernels, and I'm just like,
• 28:49
  Speaker 2: this is disgusting. You you guys are disgusting. Anyways, I
• 28:53
  Speaker 2: don't know. I think because since I've got I've been sober,
• 28:57
  Speaker 2: I'm super o cdy about my house being clean, and
• 28:59
  Speaker 2: maybe I need to like a little bit, But like,
• 29:02
  Speaker 2: how do you teach kids not to be so frickin gross?
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: You want to know what you do? You put all
• 29:07
  Speaker 1: the stuff she leaves around the house in her room,
• 29:11
  Speaker 1: the popcorn kernels, the popcorn bag. If you like it around,
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: you can have it. This is your space, this is
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: your room. How fun with it? Here's the cans of sprite. Yeah,
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: that's what I would do. But then again, I don't know.
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 29:28
  Speaker 2: Em I mean, no, you do know, I'm gonna try it.
• 29:31
  Speaker 1: You could. So speaking of how both of us parent,
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: it's weird because your kids are older. But I feel
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: like when I talk to Ocean, I'm dealing. I have
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: to remember that even though there are times she speaks
• 29:52
  Speaker 1: like she's a full teenager, I have to remember she's
• 29:55
  Speaker 1: only four almost five.
• 29:57
  Speaker 2: She's so mature for her age.
• 29:59
  Speaker 1: I know. It's why I tell her she's like, I
• 30:01
  Speaker 1: don't want to be a kid anymore. I want to
• 30:03
  Speaker 1: be a grown up. And I'm like, don't say that,
• 30:05
  Speaker 1: don't say that. But I met, I met Riley when
• 30:10
  Speaker 1: she was three. I think London was six almost seven?
• 30:15
  Speaker 1: Is that what it would have been, m or maybe
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: it was the other way around. I can't remember.
• 30:19
  Speaker 2: No, Riley was three.
• 30:21
  Speaker 1: Riley was three, right, Yep, she was a baby.
• 30:23
  Speaker 2: I think she was still. No, she wasn't in diapers.
• 30:26
  Speaker 2: I don't think she was in diapers anymore.
• 30:27
  Speaker 1: No, she wasn't in diapers when Laala was officially with him.
• 30:31
  Speaker 1: How did you approach co parenting? Were there ever any
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: rules Amber gave Lalla when it came to being with
• 30:37
  Speaker 1: her kids? This is a There were so many different phases.
• 30:41
  Speaker 1: There were moments.
• 30:42
  Speaker 2: Where like I was.
• 30:45
  Speaker 1: I remember when I was posting them and I don't
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: know if I was sober at this point or not.
• 30:49
  Speaker 1: But you had told me not to and you had
• 30:51
  Speaker 1: texted me or him, and then I continue to do it.
• 30:56
  Speaker 1: So you posted something on socials, but like, do you
• 30:59
  Speaker 1: remember it where you and I would actually have con
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: like constructive conversations about co parenting?
• 31:09
  Speaker 2: One hundred percent? I think I also did you know that?
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: Going back to like a lot of the things that
• 31:14
  Speaker 2: I got mad of. I was just looking for a
• 31:16
  Speaker 2: reason to be mad, and I wasn't healed at that point,
• 31:18
  Speaker 2: nor did I wanted to be healed. I wanted to
• 31:20
  Speaker 2: live in the anger, which is like, if anyone's going
• 31:23
  Speaker 2: through that, just just do the work. It's a lot easier.
• 31:26
  Speaker 2: It's like you get on the other side. But I
• 31:27
  Speaker 2: think I'll never forget you were and still are the
• 31:35
  Speaker 2: only woman that came into that house or in my
• 31:38
  Speaker 2: kid's life that actually gave a damn about bedtime and school,
• 31:45
  Speaker 2: specifically helping London who struggled, and so many people were
• 31:54
  Speaker 2: in denial of her challenges. But you saw that right
• 32:00
  Speaker 2: and everyone else, even to this day, the other person
• 32:03
  Speaker 2: that's in his life are you know. It says the
• 32:06
  Speaker 2: craziest shit to my kids, which makes me really angry.
• 32:12
  Speaker 1: You were.
• 32:12
  Speaker 2: You were there, and you gave structure. So when you
• 32:15
  Speaker 2: were in that house, I had to keep reminding myself
• 32:19
  Speaker 2: and actually other people had to remind me as well.
• 32:21
  Speaker 2: It's that it was. It was a good thing that
• 32:24
  Speaker 2: you were there. You were fucking there. You were there,
• 32:29
  Speaker 2: and I'll never forget you were like all hands on deck,
• 32:33
  Speaker 2: So thank.
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: You for that. Well, it was a pleasure to be
• 32:37
  Speaker 1: there for all of that, and it taught me, you know,
• 32:40
  Speaker 1: if I ever got involved again with someone who had children,
• 32:45
  Speaker 1: it would be very important for me.
• 32:53
  Speaker 3: Sorry, it's okay, just to make sure that the mom
• 32:59
  Speaker 3: knows that like you're seeing, you're heard, you know, what
• 33:03
  Speaker 3: happens at your house.
• 33:04
  Speaker 4: I would love to implement over here. Like however, I can.
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: Make your life easier, make the transition easy. There's just
• 33:14
  Speaker 1: so much that you realize when you have your.
• 33:17
  Speaker 5: Own kids, you know, And I know that I made
• 33:22
  Speaker 5: that hard for you, and I know I can't change it.
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: But I learned a lot. And I'm happy that the
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: little moments that we succeeded in co parenting together, I'm.
• 33:38
  Speaker 4: Happy that we have those, even though they were few
• 33:41
  Speaker 4: and far between, because there was just so much hurt
• 33:44
  Speaker 4: and vain and trauma. You know, we really did rise
• 33:49
  Speaker 4: to the occasion a lot, and I think we should
• 33:51
  Speaker 4: be proud.
• 33:54
  Speaker 2: Oh, I am really proud of us. We've come a
• 34:00
  Speaker 2: very very long way. And when I tell people our story,
• 34:06
  Speaker 2: the origin of our story, about this new podcast, people
• 34:11
  Speaker 2: are shocked. People are shocked, and that just makes it's
• 34:17
  Speaker 2: just confirmation that we're heading in the right direction. We
• 34:21
  Speaker 2: get one life, and we make a lot of mistakes
• 34:24
  Speaker 2: along the way. But if we're just slowly one percent
• 34:30
  Speaker 2: a little bit better every day, or ten percent one day,
• 34:35
  Speaker 2: one percent the other day, we're doing our job right.
• 34:39
  Speaker 2: We have little humans and big humans that are watching
• 34:43
  Speaker 2: every move, and we have a family now, like we
• 34:48
  Speaker 2: literally have this family that is so beautiful together.
• 34:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah, our job is just it'll only I remember a
• 34:57
  Speaker 1: therapist said to me, it only takes one healthy parent
• 34:59
  Speaker 1: to make a child. Okay, so it's our job to
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: give love, give discipline, give structure, all of the things
• 35:08
  Speaker 1: that are not that fun for a child to get.
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: But once they get older, they're very they're better for it,
• 35:15
  Speaker 1: and they're grateful. And I don't know about your kids.
• 35:18
  Speaker 1: My kid thrives when she has structure, when she is
• 35:21
  Speaker 1: able to call the shots and run shit and act
• 35:24
  Speaker 1: a damn fool. She's in a full spiral. And so
• 35:29
  Speaker 1: even though I don't get to do a lot like
• 35:32
  Speaker 1: I have to play good cop and bad cop, I'm
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: proud of it because I know that that my kid
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: is going to thrive from it. So I know it's
• 35:41
  Speaker 1: not fun that you have to see sprite cans and
• 35:44
  Speaker 1: all the things and give structure and get your ass
• 35:47
  Speaker 1: up for school. But like we're freaking crushing Amber.
• 35:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's freaking hard. Believe me. Some days all I
• 35:54
  Speaker 2: want to do is lay in my closet and eat
• 35:59
  Speaker 2: myself into Ablivian and cry.
• 36:01
  Speaker 1: I wake up in the morning and I'm like, you've
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: seen better days, bitch. You always look tired, Like I
• 36:08
  Speaker 1: always just look tired. That's just like my new I'm like.
• 36:12
  Speaker 2: I'm not always look tired.
• 36:14
  Speaker 1: Well, thank you, ipatches, bowtoks, all all of them for
• 36:19
  Speaker 1: bo talks. Yeah, thank go real there there will be
• 36:23
  Speaker 1: a point in time. We're three episodes in and I
• 36:25
  Speaker 1: think some people that are tuning in are still They're like,
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: I really do want to know the nitty gritty of
• 36:31
  Speaker 1: how they came to be. So I want people to
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: write in. I want you to ask your questions. They like,
• 36:40
  Speaker 1: don't be vague. We want to get into the nitty
• 36:42
  Speaker 1: gritty of things and be honest. So your your question
• 36:47
  Speaker 1: may be so wild, but if you have it, please
• 36:51
  Speaker 1: write it in because we want you guys to understand
• 36:53
  Speaker 1: how this started. I loved doing this podcast today though,
• 36:58
  Speaker 1: because I had the outline of the direction. But every
• 37:00
  Speaker 1: time I'm with you, I just feel like we just tangent. No,
• 37:05
  Speaker 1: I don't need bullet points.
• 37:06
  Speaker 2: There's so much And by the way, even though there's
• 37:10
  Speaker 2: been you know, some some time between the time you
• 37:15
  Speaker 2: left him to the time that you slept with them
• 37:18
  Speaker 2: or you were with him, there's so much healing. But
• 37:21
  Speaker 2: I still get healing by doing this with you the
• 37:23
  Speaker 2: same because we're talking about moments that maybe we, like
• 37:27
  Speaker 2: you didn't realize about, you know, the fingernail like situation
• 37:30
  Speaker 2: with London and doing the glue on nails like that
• 37:33
  Speaker 2: was really impactful for me as a mother at the time,
• 37:36
  Speaker 2: and you didn't know. And so it's like, this is
• 37:37
  Speaker 2: what the audience is going to get. Is they're going
• 37:39
  Speaker 2: to get They're going to see us actually heal in
• 37:43
  Speaker 2: real real time, and they're going to see us you know,
• 37:47
  Speaker 2: all the fun shit that's that's gonna come. Oh.
• 37:50
  Speaker 1: I love you so much. I see I'm excited to
• 37:53
  Speaker 1: see you in person soon.
• 37:55
  Speaker 2: Oh me too, Yeah, I know, I'm excited.
• 37:58
  Speaker 1: My loves. Thank you for listening to another episode of
• 38:01
  Speaker 1: An Unlikely Affair with Lala Kent and Amber Shiulders. We're
• 38:05
  Speaker 1: going to catch you guys next week.
• 38:06
  Speaker 2: Bye bye guys.