Latest / We Talk Back / Girl Breathe

Transcript

Girl Breathe · We Talk Back

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Speaks to the planet.
• 0:01
  Speaker 2: I'll go by the name of Charlamagne the God and
• 0:02
  Speaker 2: guess what, I can't wait to see y'all at the
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: third annual Black Effect Podcast Festival. That's right, We're coming
• 0:08
  Speaker 2: back to Atlanta, Georgia, Saturday, April twenty six at Poleman
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: Yards and it's hosted by none other than Decisions Decisions,
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: Mandy B and Weezy. Okay, we got the R and
• 0:17
  Speaker 2: B Money podcast, were taking Jay Valentine. We got the
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: Woman of All Podcasts with Sarah Jake Roberts. We got
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: Good Mom's Bad Choices. Carrie Champion will be there with
• 0:25
  Speaker 2: her next sports podcast and the Trap Nerds podcast with
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: more to be announced. And of course it's bigger than podcasts.
• 0:31
  Speaker 2: We're bringing the Black Effect marketplace with black owned businesses
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: plus the food truck court to keep you fed.
• 0:37
  Speaker 3: While you visit us.
• 0:37
  Speaker 2: All right, listen, you don't want to miss this. Tap
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: in and grab your tickets now at Black Effect dot
• 0:43
  Speaker 2: Com Flash Podcast.
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: Festival, hoping to we talk back where we encourage you
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: to hustle, hard, laugh, letter and always keep it cute.
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: So grab your coffee, cocktail and crown because it's about
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: to go down's talk talk.
• 0:59
  Speaker 3: You're just too unapologetically black women with an opinion.
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: He talks back, what's up, y'all, it's your girl a
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: j holiday? What's up, tam Damn?
• 1:11
  Speaker 3: Hey, y'all. I love y'all so much.
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: Hey, I'm well, girls, stop light. These people love him.
• 1:23
  Speaker 3: I love him so much. They love me too.
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: Until you do some ship, they don't like, they're gonna
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: be dragging and it's trying to come for you for
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: look for sucking tubs.
• 1:34
  Speaker 3: I don't.
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: That's a lit ma noth until April. After April girls.
• 1:46
  Speaker 3: Drop, my mama gonna come up to me, coming told
• 1:48
  Speaker 3: for me yikes, and then walked off. I was like,
• 1:51
  Speaker 3: oh wow, everybody got something to say. Ye a man
• 1:55
  Speaker 3: foot in my mouth? Y'all put on a lot of
• 1:58
  Speaker 3: technic tests. I never put him wonder his foot in
• 2:01
  Speaker 3: my mouth? Shame Anyway, How was your weekend?
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: My weekend was great? Did I do something this weekend? Oh?
• 2:10
  Speaker 3: I did go outside?
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: Not outside for real, I just did like a little.
• 2:13
  Speaker 1: On Saturday, I went by one of my homegirl's house
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: who I recently reconnected with, and just talk some shit
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: for a couple hours over some crab bags. Me shout
• 2:26
  Speaker 1: out to Courtney girl, she'd be in roger Wood sausage.
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: When the last time you had a roger Wood sausage.
• 2:31
  Speaker 3: Roger Woods all the time?
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: Are you serious? Oh my god, First of all, on
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: you sausage, and don't put that shit in my bag
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: in my crab bag.
• 2:39
  Speaker 3: I don't want that in my crab bag either, because
• 2:41
  Speaker 3: it overpowers all the other food in there. But I
• 2:44
  Speaker 3: was have a roger Wood fried up good on spicing
• 2:50
  Speaker 3: bread with some must period.
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: Shame. Now back in the day when we was kids, like,
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: if you ain't having a roger Wood sausage in your house,
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: you really ain't have no food. As long was we
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: had a box of roger Wad sausage like we shit
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: was lit.
• 3:03
  Speaker 3: You eat and eggs and rama's straight.
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: I probably had a roger Wood sausage in middle school.
• 3:11
  Speaker 3: Damn. I had one a couple of days ago. So
• 3:17
  Speaker 3: this weekend it was the Black College Invitational Championship in Charlotte.
• 3:23
  Speaker 3: Is a new tournament. My friend Russy put it on y'all,
• 3:27
  Speaker 3: we got to support this tournament, like this is the
• 3:30
  Speaker 3: first year. He wants all our support, all the HBCUs.
• 3:33
  Speaker 3: He wants this involved y'all. So everyone, we got to
• 3:36
  Speaker 3: support this black basketball tournament in Charlotte, North Carolina, and
• 3:42
  Speaker 3: it was I saw a lot of parties surrounded just
• 3:44
  Speaker 3: like CI double A.
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: It's supposed to be coming back, right, CI double A.
• 3:48
  Speaker 3: I don't know, but this is about this one, this
• 3:52
  Speaker 3: black one brought on by blacks, presented by black people
• 3:58
  Speaker 3: for HBCUs. Y'all get involved intellect.
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah, did you attend any of the fescificity festivities?
• 4:08
  Speaker 3: I actually didn't get to go out to the tournament.
• 4:12
  Speaker 3: I did go to There's a new lounge in Charlotte
• 4:16
  Speaker 3: called Taranga that opened up over the weekend too, and
• 4:19
  Speaker 3: I popped out there and it was nice.
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: It was Taranga, Topanga, Taranga whever it comes.
• 4:24
  Speaker 3: From like that. I think it's called Tarango though, and
• 4:27
  Speaker 3: it was cute in there. So that opened over the weekend.
• 4:31
  Speaker 3: They're soft open, but that was soft about it. It
• 4:33
  Speaker 3: was fully open. So I went there and that was it.
• 4:37
  Speaker 3: You know, I don't get out too much these days,
• 4:41
  Speaker 3: I mean in the house. M hm.
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: Well that sounds fun.
• 4:46
  Speaker 3: It was fun. It was a good time. Meet Jamaican
• 4:48
  Speaker 3: and Raquel.
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: With Ja Maka Jamaica honestae Jamaican, so damn long.
• 4:54
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it was a good time. Shout out to Jamaica
• 4:55
  Speaker 3: and Raquel, let's get in there now, what you got?
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: What you I You know what?
• 5:02
  Speaker 3: I keep seeing posts about a BBL smell. So this
• 5:10
  Speaker 3: one woman got on there and said the bbl's is
• 5:13
  Speaker 3: stinking and ain't nobody talking about it? That it spelled
• 5:17
  Speaker 3: like she said, it smelled like a pot of broccoli
• 5:21
  Speaker 3: that got to live on it and been sitting on
• 5:23
  Speaker 3: the stove for two days. God damn, Now, listen, if
• 5:27
  Speaker 3: you got a BBL, y'all, tell us do your shit
• 5:29
  Speaker 3: smell like broccoli every now and then when you swear
• 5:31
  Speaker 3: or something? And what causes that? So I looked up
• 5:35
  Speaker 3: the BBL smell and apparently there's some truth to it.
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: I've been hearing that for years, that the bbl's be leaking,
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: that they be smelling, And I don't know if it
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: has anything to do with that. Maybe, I don't know
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: if the the fact that was transferred to it is
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: like rotten. I don't know. I'm one of my little
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: cousins that got a BBL one time and her shit
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: went wrong. Tell me a motherfucker who ever got a
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: BBL in Charleston, South Carolina. I don't know, but she did, okay,
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: and they I remember going with her to an appointment
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: and they had to put guds in that thing, like
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: she had a whole back there because her body was
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: actually rejecting her own fat in that area. So she
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: got an infection. So I don't know if maybe because
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: you know these girls, they be having to get that
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: shit cut out now well wait wait, wait, let me
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: back up. Yeah, so that was a fat transfer. That's
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: different the bbls A lot of the women have, maybe
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: like the saline. Yeah, it's like the foreign matter that
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: they're putting into the body. It's not their own fat. Yeah,
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: I did see your titty, bitch you. This girl is
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: such a whole like, yeah, I saw the nipple. But
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: why you gotta put it in the audio. She just
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: want everybody know her fucking pities is out your ass,
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: crazy ass. But look, I did google BBL smell and
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: it just said this is from South Shore Plastic Surgery,
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: it says, identifying the BBL smell. The BBL smell is
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: often described as musty or slightly sour, so that there
• 7:19
  Speaker 1: goes that broccoli with the lid on. But it should
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: not be overpowering. You may notice the order more prominently
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: after sweating or sitting for extended periods. However, the smell
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: is a company accompanied by other symptoms like redness, swelling,
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: or fever. These could be signs of infection. So if
• 7:38
  Speaker 1: the booty is smelling.
• 7:40
  Speaker 3: So that must be like a new BBL. The old
• 7:43
  Speaker 3: bbls can't be having this smell, right.
• 7:46
  Speaker 1: I think people be having problems with the old bbls.
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: They've had this thing sitting in their bodies for years rottening.
• 7:54
  Speaker 3: It's crazy. Yeah, I don't know. If it can rotten
• 8:00
  Speaker 3: your own fat, I don't know.
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: And it says maintaining optimal hygiene after BBL can be challenging.
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: I don't know why. Maybe because y'all put too much
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: as back there, especially when using the restroom. Residual stool
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: or urine on the skin can lead to bacterial growth
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: and older development if not clean thoroughly. Be extra diligent
• 8:20
  Speaker 1: about cleansing after bio movements and urination to prevent unwanted smells.
• 8:25
  Speaker 3: But ain't that to everybody?
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm like that is not exclusive to booties, right.
• 8:33
  Speaker 3: Wipe your head is a thing for everybody, you will
• 8:36
  Speaker 3: think of your ass dirty, like what the hell?
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I believe it's rottening though, I believe if it's
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: not just like the BBL with the fat transfer, like
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: using your own fat, which your body can also still
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: reject that, right, But you do have a lot of
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: women that were getting the asses added on before the
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: BBL fat transfer. It's been around, but yeah, they were
• 8:57
  Speaker 1: doing injections in the back of the club or in
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: some basement in New York City, like yeah, and people
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: were going to prison for performing these things. Fix a
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: flat in the ass all type of shit and your
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: ass is crazy.
• 9:10
  Speaker 3: Yeah, nuts, Well that's proof I ain't had no BBM.
• 9:16
  Speaker 3: My shit don't never smell like broccing now.
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: And you know, just like with anything else, like you
• 9:24
  Speaker 1: are the first person to smell these things. You should
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: not be bunking that ass round the club knowing that
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: this thing possibly be smelling like hot shit. Bunks that ass,
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: like bunks that ass.
• 9:36
  Speaker 3: You start experiencing that, you should probably go to a doctor,
• 9:38
  Speaker 3: because it got to be something that you can do
• 9:40
  Speaker 3: to help, you know, like combat the broccoli yell.
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: So I saw online and look, and I you might
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: think this is crazy. Personally, I don't think it is.
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: I think it's very plausible. If I were an attorney
• 9:59
  Speaker 1: and somebody brought this lawsuit to me, I'll be like,
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: you know what, you might be onto something. So apparently
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: a Russian man sued Apple for turning him gay. It
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: says a Russian man, uh, his name is d Razommulov,
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: fouled a lawsuit against Apple, claiming that the company's products
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: turned him gay. This is one of the most bizarre
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: legal cases in history, it says. It says he downloaded
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: a crypto app onto his phone where he started receiving
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: gay coin instead of bitcoin. The Apple apparently said, don't
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: judge until you try. Inspiring Razummulov, whatever, how are you
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: pronounce the last name? To begin having sex, to begin
• 10:44
  Speaker 1: having same sex relationships, he ended up falling in love
• 10:48
  Speaker 1: with another man, and now he is suing Apple because
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: of it.
• 10:54
  Speaker 3: About that the dumbest shit I ever heard. Didn't nobody
• 10:57
  Speaker 3: to make you fuck a dude, You chose it.
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: No, I think that, I really do think that there
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: is subliminal messaging with this. It's direct messaging. Don't knock
• 11:08
  Speaker 1: until you try it, you know what I'm saying? And
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: he actually tried it. You know, I know I've said
• 11:14
  Speaker 1: this on the show before. There's a lot of men
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: that are probably gay in the mind before they are
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: actually physically gay, right, or maybe some of them may
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: never ever act on the urge right to have sex
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: with it with the same sex, but they think about
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: it a lot and they just haven't gotten like the
• 11:31
  Speaker 1: opportune time or situation to do it. And now this
• 11:36
  Speaker 1: thing has enticed him to do it. He might have
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: a lawsuit.
• 11:41
  Speaker 3: He gonna lose, bag.
• 11:44
  Speaker 1: I don't think so. Think about that.
• 11:45
  Speaker 3: Accountability, Like Apple didn't make you go nowhere and fuck
• 11:49
  Speaker 3: no man, like that was a firm decision.
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: What if he can prove that Apple kept sending him
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: this message to his phone, like it just kept popping
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: up on his phone. Don't knock it to you tried.
• 12:00
  Speaker 3: That is not that is but Erica keep sending me
• 12:04
  Speaker 3: messages get broccoli soup. I ain't got none yet.
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: But McDonald's has been sued for a subliminal messaging many
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: times throughout history. Think about this young boy who just
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: committed suicide because AI told him to come be with him.
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: You see yeah this album, Yeah, like and if somebody I.
• 12:22
  Speaker 3: Just don't think sexual acts count because you have to
• 12:26
  Speaker 3: literally go do it, like you have to decide that
• 12:29
  Speaker 3: you want to have sex with another the same sex.
• 12:32
  Speaker 1: I think he got a lot of suit. We'll see.
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna track it if you're win that.
• 12:37
  Speaker 3: I'm suing everybody for every choice I've ever made in
• 12:40
  Speaker 3: life that wasn't right, spending spending money on clothes. Y'all
• 12:46
  Speaker 3: keep sending me messages about buying clothes, and I keep
• 12:49
  Speaker 3: buying clothes and I ain't got no money. That's your fault.
• 12:52
  Speaker 3: So I'm gonna sue y'all, and I better win this.
• 12:54
  Speaker 3: Motherfucker win about it. Beat Apple. The Apple owe him
• 12:58
  Speaker 3: some money for him deciding to suck some dick. That
• 13:02
  Speaker 3: was a choice. If you want to suck some dick,
• 13:05
  Speaker 3: it's okay, but don't don't. Don't put it on Apple.
• 13:08
  Speaker 3: Apple ain't got nothing to do with it. It's okay, Eve.
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: I feel like we could find some lawsuits where people
• 13:17
  Speaker 1: probably suit him one for these things. They may not
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: publicize them heavily because they don't want other people trying
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: and shit, but you know, like all lawyers got to
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: do is convince the jury.
• 13:29
  Speaker 3: That's it.
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: And I feel like he would be able to his
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: attorney may be able to convince the jury that they.
• 13:36
  Speaker 3: Got ain't no way. I don't know who else going
• 13:38
  Speaker 3: to be able to win that kid, Me, that's who me.
• 13:43
  Speaker 3: Look what else happened over the weekend? Oh did you
• 13:48
  Speaker 3: see where Young Miami? She was on Shannon Shark m
• 13:54
  Speaker 3: C Club and she explained that she'll give her significant
• 13:59
  Speaker 3: other or four times to cheat before she calls it
• 14:01
  Speaker 3: a rap. Four times to cheat. That number is very specific.
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: I give my four times that I haven't watched a
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: full interview yet. I only saw like the clips online,
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: but I laughed my ass off where she said like
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: four times, y'all Miami ass funny as hell without trying
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: to be funny. She just right round the way girl,
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: because you.
• 14:27
  Speaker 3: Can't even you shouldn't even if that's the case, you
• 14:29
  Speaker 3: shouldn't say it out loud. I feel like the nigga
• 14:33
  Speaker 3: gonna be like shit, you said I had four times?
• 14:35
  Speaker 3: I seen it a club shack shade girl.
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: I have an ex boyfriend who always, like, at least
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: once every two years, I might speak to this nigga,
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: and he always complains about how I didn't give him second, third, fourth, chance.
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: You give all these other niggas a chance, you ain't
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: never get to fuck me over again. You mad because
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: I gave another nigga a chance to fuck me over
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: and not you. Right, that is beyond me. These people's thinking, Nah, nigga,
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: I just didn't feel like you were worth all these
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: extra chances, which he had a lot. So I'm trying
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: to figure out what the fuck are you talking about? Like, yes,
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: I'm definitely not about to give a nigga like okay,
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: if you want to strike off one, you got three left.
• 15:18
  Speaker 3: I'm like some people, cheating is an ultimate deal worker.
• 15:22
  Speaker 3: It's the ultimate disrespect for the relationships. Some people, it ain't.
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: You know, I'm a go ahead.
• 15:32
  Speaker 3: I always have to weigh like, am I'm more happy
• 15:37
  Speaker 3: than not? That's always an answer for me in every scenario.
• 15:42
  Speaker 3: Am I smiling more or not smiling enough? Then I
• 15:46
  Speaker 3: gotta go. It don't matter what the infraction is.
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: Right or how many times. I mean, the more you
• 15:52
  Speaker 1: do shit, I'm losing like respect for you, I'm losing trust.
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying. So even if you and
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: then eventually you ain't gonna be able to trust me, nigga,
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: because I'm gonna make you feel it, you know, So
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: do you really want to be here after? You don't
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: shoot on me? A lot of times I may not
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: have left you, and that's a toxic trade of mine.
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: I may not leave you right for cheating, but you're
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: gonna feel my wrath and I'm not even I may
• 16:17
  Speaker 1: I'm not gonna say nothing, but you're gonna feel like
• 16:19
  Speaker 1: something going on. Okay, So don't play with me because
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: I do. I'm I am a one upper.
• 16:28
  Speaker 3: My daddy said when he had cheated on my mom
• 16:31
  Speaker 3: when they were young, and Mama took him back, but
• 16:34
  Speaker 3: he said we had to eat out the same plate
• 16:36
  Speaker 3: for like two months before he trusted the eating over
• 16:43
  Speaker 3: here with your fork because we're not eating out a
• 16:45
  Speaker 3: different bowl.
• 16:48
  Speaker 1: He thought she was gonna poison him. Yep, why are
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: you still with somebody you can't trust in that? I
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: never understand why men stay with women they still eat
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: food from. But you don't trust me?
• 16:58
  Speaker 2: Right?
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: Just be eating up this food, asking me what I'm cooking,
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: asking me what we eating? But you but you scared?
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: You ain't scared enough. You ain't scared, You are not
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: scared enough? All right, y'all? So for this week's episode.
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: Tell me when the last time you watched Wayne Takes Hell?
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: The other day for realm So I have watched it
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: as like a super adult because I feel like we
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: would have been teenagers when it came out, right, Like
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: I have watched it, Girl beat it. I wasn't born yet.
• 17:35
  Speaker 1: I saw it last week. Girl Get out of Here.
• 17:37
  Speaker 3: A vintage movie for me.
• 17:40
  Speaker 1: Like I don't know if we were watching Wayne Takes
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: Hell like when we actually got into these like serious relationships.
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: When you have watched Waiting Takes Heil, And I do
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: suggest y'all to go watch it now if you haven't
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: in the last five years, six years, ten years, whatever
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: it is.
• 17:56
  Speaker 3: I the other day on the plane, right he has
• 18:00
  Speaker 3: one of those movies.
• 18:01
  Speaker 1: On the flight, Go watch it because I want to
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: talk about it with you, but I also want to
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: talk about it like with the listeners. What y'all think
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: about Waiting Takes Heale as it pertains to like our
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: life now and dating, did anything change? Is it the
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: same shit we now experiencing what we saw them as
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: you know, grown women, career women, mothers, single fine bitch,
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying, Like, like, are we experiencing
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: the same things.
• 18:26
  Speaker 3: Let's get into it.
• 18:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we'll be right back, all right now, asorry from
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: you know, just thinking about the characters on Waiting the
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: Waiting Takes Hell. I actually came across this post and
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: I sent it to Tamman. I just want to read
• 18:42
  Speaker 1: a couple of parts of it, right, because it says,
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: after watching excuse me, after we watching Waiting Takes Hell
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: for the first time since I was younger, same shit, right,
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: it felt to me. Excuse me, It left me with
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: a lot to unpack. And here's a whole thread, right.
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: So it begins with saying, like, so this movie is
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: classically known for the infamous scene of Bernadine, that character
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: that was played by Angela Angel Bassett, Yeah, setting her
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: soon to be ex husband clothes on fire in his car.
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: But that wasn't the only thing that exploded, right, So
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: she's saying, like, mentally, now, let's just unpack that one
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: part because I literally have that the scene where she
• 19:26
  Speaker 1: walked up in the ballroom and slapped that white bitch.
• 19:29
  Speaker 1: I got that shit saved on Instagram.
• 19:31
  Speaker 3: I seen it one day, and I.
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: Love that part of the movie. Bernardine.
• 19:37
  Speaker 2: I'm in a meeting here.
• 19:39
  Speaker 3: If you need something, I suggest, would.
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: You mind terribly if I had a few words with
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: my husband? Oh? What the hell are you doing? I've
• 19:46
  Speaker 1: been to the bank. Thank you, thank you for thanking
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: of your children. Everybody out, yes, out, you're comfort wife,
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: and start throwing some tantrum because you can't finish what
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: you started. What am I supposed to do for money?
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: I gave you the house now, sun.
• 20:04
  Speaker 3: I think we all enjoyed that part.
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: That looked like it was a real slap.
• 20:11
  Speaker 3: It was not.
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: It looked really real, like they acted the shit out
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: of that part.
• 20:15
  Speaker 3: She's like, do you excuse me? Do you think I
• 20:17
  Speaker 3: could talk to my husband for a second. She's like, sure,
• 20:20
  Speaker 3: I didn't.
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: So the next threat, the next party threat says, there's
• 20:28
  Speaker 1: a heavy depiction of a loneliness and how women can
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: consistently say yes to things that say no to them.
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: That's true, right when you like kind of lonely?
• 20:42
  Speaker 3: Mm hmm, this is definitely uh me, you be settled
• 20:48
  Speaker 3: up for shit, right, entertaining old shit just because it's familiar,
• 20:55
  Speaker 3: but it don't really align with what I really want
• 20:59
  Speaker 3: or desire, honestly, and the loneliness get to you. Man
• 21:03
  Speaker 3: that ship, I'll tell you, and your body will betray
• 21:06
  Speaker 3: your mind every time.
• 21:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and then you asking asking different you asking a
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: universe for one thing, right, but you're not doing your
• 21:14
  Speaker 1: part because you're lonely. And I say this a lot.
• 21:17
  Speaker 1: I remember when one of my friends, her daughter is
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: my goddaughter. She she sent me a text message one
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: day and asked me like to help her basically write
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: a letter to my goddaughter graduating from high school. And
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: one of the main things I said for her to
• 21:33
  Speaker 1: put in this letters like get comfortable being alone, you know,
• 21:37
  Speaker 1: be okay with yourself. You know. Yeah that And it's
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: really not though, because I do like solitude. I do
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: like being by myself.
• 21:48
  Speaker 3: And you're ever seeing you be single. I've been you
• 21:52
  Speaker 3: be like a man, you be like consistently with a
• 21:55
  Speaker 3: new nigga.
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: That's not true. See it's mental though, right. I might physically,
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: but they don't God me, mentally.
• 22:07
  Speaker 3: You got another nigga already. God damn, I can't have
• 22:10
  Speaker 3: a nigga. I never have a nigga. This nigga have
• 22:13
  Speaker 3: a new nigga every couple of months.
• 22:18
  Speaker 1: It's the physical, not the mental anyway, girls, I'm telling
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: my business like I want to be telling it. It
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: is also revealed how sometimes single mothers put the responsibility
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: on their sons to be the man of the house
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: and absence of their fathers.
• 22:34
  Speaker 3: Absolutely, So that's Bernardine Bernadine definitely, and I know women
• 22:37
  Speaker 3: like not Bernardine.
• 22:40
  Speaker 1: That's the character of that Gloria, Yeah, Gloria.
• 22:43
  Speaker 3: Gloria does that, who was played by Loretta Devine. She
• 22:49
  Speaker 3: definitely enmeshed her son like and just treated him like
• 22:55
  Speaker 3: he was her man instead of her son, and didn't
• 22:58
  Speaker 3: want him to go hang out with friends, want him
• 23:00
  Speaker 3: to travel, didn't want him to experience because she had
• 23:03
  Speaker 3: put that responsibility on her son to be her man. Yeah,
• 23:08
  Speaker 3: she stopped doing that. It's a lot of y'all moms
• 23:11
  Speaker 3: out here listening to us right now. Stop doing that
• 23:14
  Speaker 3: to your son, not his responsibility.
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and so they lean on you know, when I
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: checked into the hotel when I went to Dallas last week,
• 23:26
  Speaker 1: I told the girl at the desk, like, yeah, I
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: do a podcast, so you know, I sent it to
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: her so she could listen to a young girl. And
• 23:32
  Speaker 1: she was like, you know, y'all should do an episode
• 23:34
  Speaker 1: on black women and their sons. And I didn't understand
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: what she was talking about until she like explained more.
• 23:40
  Speaker 1: Because she's the daughter, right, and she has a brother
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: that the mom you know, puts you on this pedestal. Yeah,
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: And I explained to her this is what it is,
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: because she is using her son as a place filler
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: for the man she doesn't have. So when I say
• 23:56
  Speaker 1: I don't like men who got mamas, this is exactly
• 23:59
  Speaker 1: why I need your mom to be in a healthy relationship.
• 24:01
  Speaker 1: So she's not interfering in ours, right, That's it, you know.
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: So it goes on to say, we see a normal
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: We see a normality of women settling for temporary satisfaction
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: with married men in exchange for a false reality of companionship.
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: Reassurance can provide the comfort of a weighted blanket, even
• 24:23
  Speaker 1: if it is an illusion.
• 24:26
  Speaker 3: And now that's Savanna played by Whitney Houston.
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: Yep, And they remember the scene where Bernadine met the
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: guy played by Wesley Snipes.
• 24:39
  Speaker 3: Oh, I think no. First of all, Bernadine Angela Bassett
• 24:44
  Speaker 3: met Herbert. Who Herbert, he's harmless. Now he was married
• 24:52
  Speaker 3: when she went and fucked him.
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: And it's kind of like, all.
• 24:55
  Speaker 3: Right, you upset about your husband leaving and then you
• 24:57
  Speaker 3: went and fuck somebody else's husband. I've seen contradictory it is,
• 25:03
  Speaker 3: And see that's why I beat bitches up because it
• 25:07
  Speaker 3: would be the hypocrisy for me. How you smashing somebody
• 25:10
  Speaker 3: else man, but you don't want nobody smashing your man.
• 25:12
  Speaker 1: Like what goes around comes around.
• 25:14
  Speaker 3: You're doing some shit you just got finished doing. It's crazy.
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah, And I ain't gonna sit up here on this
• 25:19
  Speaker 1: goddamn what kind of Mike's Jesus? On the sure Mike
• 25:23
  Speaker 1: and Lions say that I never have sex with or
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: fucked with somebody else's man, I absolutely have. That's why
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: I'm never surprised when it shit happens to me. It
• 25:32
  Speaker 1: just you just can't be an habitual side bitch when
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: it comes to me, Like you just can't always be
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: trying to fuck on my man. It's a problem for me,
• 25:39
  Speaker 1: right stothing a.
• 25:42
  Speaker 3: Part time.
• 25:45
  Speaker 1: You get four times to fuck my nigga, and on
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: a full time I'm beating your ass cause the niggas
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: for everybody.
• 25:55
  Speaker 3: Listen, I ain't never been with nobody, uh.
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: Girl, Come on, come on, okay, come on, never love.
• 26:04
  Speaker 3: You next s lot.
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: You make me made me click off my damn slides.
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: Hold No one, we got a in this day, I
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: why you're.
• 26:17
  Speaker 3: Trying to find it? While grieving in the moment of
• 26:20
  Speaker 3: love loss, one would settle for just being held to
• 26:23
  Speaker 3: remind themselves that they too have some level of capacity.
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: M hm. And that was the scene with her and
• 26:30
  Speaker 1: I don't even know what his name was in the movie.
• 26:31
  Speaker 3: Do you know you remember Wesley Snipes? No, I don't remember.
• 26:38
  Speaker 1: I remember, but yeah, they didn't have sex. They just
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: met at a bar in a hotel and they just
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: spent the night together just for some intimacy.
• 26:49
  Speaker 3: He's still cheated on his wife by doing that.
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: Well, his wife was was terminally ill also, you know,
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: so if I was a terminally ill wife, like please
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: go live your life, I would not want somebody to
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: be like just at my bedside.
• 27:05
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean I would want them at my bedsite.
• 27:07
  Speaker 3: But I would understand if he was cuddling with somebody
• 27:12
  Speaker 3: to be comforted in the mister my you know me dying?
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: Do you remember? I can't remember her name though, This
• 27:21
  Speaker 1: is just I have to find a story and tell
• 27:24
  Speaker 1: you all about it. But it was a black woman.
• 27:27
  Speaker 1: She was very famous, like on social media and stuff,
• 27:30
  Speaker 1: and she had got like Parkinson. No, she had got dementia.
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: I believe she came she was diagnosed with dementia and
• 27:35
  Speaker 1: she was declining like so imagine like I don't know,
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: Oprah renfree all of a sudden, and and her husband
• 27:44
  Speaker 1: now has has her propped up with his new white
• 27:47
  Speaker 1: bitch next to him, like there's still yeah, he's now
• 27:53
  Speaker 1: moved his new woman in while he cares for his.
• 27:57
  Speaker 3: Wait till my dad. I'm still living, God damn.
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: And y'all on my page right the nerve.
• 28:06
  Speaker 3: But some niggas will just leave you to feel for yourself.
• 28:10
  Speaker 3: So I guess that's better than that. But it's don't
• 28:13
  Speaker 3: bring that bitch, don't have, we don't need, We ain't
• 28:15
  Speaker 3: in no throuble because I'm sick.
• 28:19
  Speaker 1: And she just looking sitting there, looking out of place,
• 28:22
  Speaker 1: just wondering, you know, herself anymore?
• 28:25
  Speaker 3: Yeah, all right. The next line says, and how could
• 28:31
  Speaker 3: we forget the fact that sometimes parents will project the
• 28:34
  Speaker 3: areas of lacking their life and try to control your
• 28:36
  Speaker 3: destiny based off of their fear.
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: Been there barn mm hmm.
• 28:43
  Speaker 3: So that mama was encouraging her to sleep with somebody
• 28:48
  Speaker 3: else's husband and have and build a relationship with someone
• 28:51
  Speaker 3: as a husband because she didn't want her to end
• 28:54
  Speaker 3: up alone like her, he's a good man, Savannah. We
• 29:00
  Speaker 3: shared that line so much, but he really wasn't. He
• 29:05
  Speaker 3: wasn't good a good man at all.
• 29:09
  Speaker 1: He was not good at all. And you know, I
• 29:12
  Speaker 1: kind of had that issue with my mama man still
• 29:14
  Speaker 1: talking to my ex fiance, like, get off the phone
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: with that nigga. And it was only because that nigga
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: could build shit from scratch and she didn't have that
• 29:21
  Speaker 1: her own relationship, like somebody who was like hands on
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: could do all the things that she likes to do
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: and doing with her Like I'm being abused by this nigga.
• 29:33
  Speaker 3: Some carpety.
• 29:34
  Speaker 1: She like, keep talking to him so you can put
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: this tile up in the kitchen. First break up that
• 29:41
  Speaker 1: really happened in real life, Mama, hey girl, or the
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: next one? So I said. The common theme in that
• 29:51
  Speaker 1: the common theme is that black women are expected to
• 29:54
  Speaker 1: settle and see wherever you land, even if it means
• 29:58
  Speaker 1: sharing with someone else. A lot of the things, a
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: lot of things can build up, but how does one
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: release when these things get too heavy? And it says
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: now again, I watched this as a kid and won't
• 30:11
  Speaker 1: take away from it being a classic, But now as
• 30:14
  Speaker 1: an adult, I question if the title Waiting to Exhale
• 30:18
  Speaker 1: is a sign of foreshadowing that may never come. Y'all,
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: let me know what y'all think and see. Thus now
• 30:25
  Speaker 1: our conversation about these characters in the movie, because really,
• 30:29
  Speaker 1: waiting takes hell. Were y'all really like they damn show
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: was their damn show was waiting? Yeah? And I feel
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: like these characters still exist today amongst the women and
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: then the archaeotype, like these men also still exist. These
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: same type of relationships still go on, and you just
• 30:50
  Speaker 1: throw social media on tomics, right. Imagine if they had
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: social media, then Bernardine would have been on Instagram blasting
• 30:58
  Speaker 1: the shit out that white lady.
• 31:00
  Speaker 3: Somebody would have took a video of her all up
• 31:02
  Speaker 3: on Herbert in the club.
• 31:05
  Speaker 1: Exactly. The slap would have been on the internet in
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: real time. You know, if social media existed, somebody would
• 31:11
  Speaker 1: have been in that office recording that shit. Like you
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: really could get away with murder back in the day.
• 31:15
  Speaker 1: Now not so much. Yeah, ye.
• 31:19
  Speaker 3: The pool side, Yeah, we getting pictures of you ho exactly,
• 31:24
  Speaker 3: So here's like the I guess like the character breakdowns.
• 31:27
  Speaker 1: Right. So Savannah, which is played by Whitney Houston, she's
• 31:32
  Speaker 1: a successful career woman searching for love. Okay, so that's
• 31:36
  Speaker 1: a lot of women's stories. Like you know that you
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: got the men out here, the Red pel community and
• 31:40
  Speaker 1: other regular black men are saying, we don't give a
• 31:43
  Speaker 1: shit about y'all degrees, jobs, y'all be acting nasty when
• 31:46
  Speaker 1: you get them, and you know, we just want good women, right.
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: But it is the more money you make, the more
• 31:54
  Speaker 1: assets you acquire, sometimes it is hard to find love,
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: you know, because who really loves you? Who's trying to
• 32:00
  Speaker 1: use you? It's like we have to we have to
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: really And then the successful men don't really want a
• 32:07
  Speaker 1: woman that's as successful as them. It's like some maybe
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: it's a subconscious thing for them. I don't know that they.
• 32:13
  Speaker 3: Don't even realize a power thing.
• 32:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because you can't really control this woman in a way.
• 32:21
  Speaker 1: Or maybe maybe women the more degrees you get, the
• 32:24
  Speaker 1: more money you make, maybe you aren't culchable, Maybe you
• 32:27
  Speaker 1: can't be led. You know, that's something to think about.
• 32:30
  Speaker 3: What was a nigga name?
• 32:31
  Speaker 1: Who?
• 32:32
  Speaker 3: Uh? Who? She's like? I gave him twenty dollars. Gas
• 32:37
  Speaker 3: came to seven dollars and he didn't even bring me
• 32:39
  Speaker 3: my change and he was in here her tooth brush
• 32:42
  Speaker 3: and shit, there was like.
• 32:47
  Speaker 1: And it was over like a couple like thirtys That
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: was the guy Robin was fucking with, right that Savannah?
• 32:56
  Speaker 3: Really, Yeah, I'm gonna keep it at the zoo.
• 32:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you know the damn movie orbat him nut.
• 33:08
  Speaker 3: I noticed movie Girl and I just watched it over again.
• 33:11
  Speaker 1: So yeah, so it says you. So she's trying to
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: like maintain her Savannah's trying to maintain her self respect
• 33:18
  Speaker 1: and recognize when a relationship isn't serving her right. So
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: that's a lot of our stories, like being able to
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: see when she's not working out and walk away earlyer.
• 33:30
  Speaker 3: That's that be the part for me, mm hmm, because
• 33:33
  Speaker 3: I'll be mad about something and be like, I'm done
• 33:35
  Speaker 3: with this motherfucker, and then when I'm unmad, I let
• 33:39
  Speaker 3: him come back.
• 33:40
  Speaker 1: The thing is I don't never get unmad because I
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: do hold grudges, right, So then what keeps happening is
• 33:46
  Speaker 1: that I'm just adjusting. I'm just like living in like
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: just adjusting. And you may not like who are to
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: come after a while, I'm.
• 33:57
  Speaker 3: Not mad no more. I had to make a video
• 33:59
  Speaker 3: to myself. Look, I'm you're fucking stupid again.
• 34:06
  Speaker 1: Well, I don't be like just mad, let's just consistently mad.
• 34:09
  Speaker 1: But I I don't never forget you see what I'm saying.
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: So you think shit cool. I it's here and it
• 34:17
  Speaker 1: ain't going nowhere. I may not act mad every single
• 34:20
  Speaker 1: day because that's just not my I don't walk around mad.
• 34:23
  Speaker 1: I'm just my normal setting is happy.
• 34:25
  Speaker 3: So you don't let shit go.
• 34:28
  Speaker 1: Not really, I just put a people either. I don't.
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: It's not about not letting things go okay once Okay,
• 34:36
  Speaker 1: I put a sticky note on you, right. I may
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: not let that thing determine how I handle things with
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: you in the future. But if there is, like uh,
• 34:46
  Speaker 1: if I can tie this new thing to that thing,
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: it still exists. It's not that I didn't forget about it.
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: You're still doing the thing. Okay, you see what I'm saying,
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: So that I won't say that. I just hold grudges
• 34:59
  Speaker 1: and I'm just not fuck with you no more because
• 35:01
  Speaker 1: obviously I've fucked with people who have done some super
• 35:03
  Speaker 1: dirty shit to me, and I do give grace and
• 35:06
  Speaker 1: room for people to grow the same way I need
• 35:08
  Speaker 1: room to grow. But if the shit looked fucking routine,
• 35:12
  Speaker 1: I'm not gonna forget. I remember because I got it.
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: I've been at a sticky note on your ass. I
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: don't forget to the Bernardine character, which I think everybody
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: loves her character, right, I feel like she has like
• 35:22
  Speaker 1: had like the biggest, biggest part and the biggest storyline
• 35:26
  Speaker 1: in the movie for the most part. So I mean
• 35:29
  Speaker 1: her husband did the worst shit you could think of, right,
• 35:33
  Speaker 1: you help this man build this company together, I mean
• 35:36
  Speaker 1: build this company. Yeah, you know what I'm saying. Now,
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: he's just like discarding you. You got children for him,
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: and he's like, I'll get them for the holidays, like
• 35:44
  Speaker 1: just not leaving you with nothing, which I don't even
• 35:46
  Speaker 1: understand how that can even happen. Like she put her
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: whole life to the side for his dreams.
• 35:51
  Speaker 3: She made him her whole life. She did. We should
• 35:57
  Speaker 3: all take a lesson from that, because you'll fall in
• 35:59
  Speaker 3: love and you know, want to be the most supportive
• 36:02
  Speaker 3: partner and lose yourself and look up. And this nigga
• 36:07
  Speaker 3: has all this money now and done all these things
• 36:10
  Speaker 3: and if he don't love you anymore, now you just
• 36:14
  Speaker 3: lost her. King was definitely lost after this, like cut
• 36:19
  Speaker 3: my hair. If you don't come with a cut it,
• 36:20
  Speaker 3: I'll cut the shit like she didn't even know, like
• 36:24
  Speaker 3: you know, who she was was anymore without her.
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: And then in today's time, Bernardine would be on social
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: media and there would be men calling her washed up
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: and baggage, baggage and all this shit because she gave
• 36:38
  Speaker 1: a man her whole life. Yep, you know, and now
• 36:42
  Speaker 1: they're acting like, Okay, you can't do any better. You know,
• 36:44
  Speaker 1: nobody wants you now, which is bullshit.
• 36:47
  Speaker 3: Niggas at the seven and eleventh the other night where
• 36:50
  Speaker 3: the night got on the rollers in her head call
• 36:52
  Speaker 3: I had to take my girlfriend home.
• 36:55
  Speaker 1: Do you remember that, yeah, dean man, Like, so I
• 37:02
  Speaker 1: am guilty of definitely losing myself in a relationship and
• 37:06
  Speaker 1: looking at not doing my hair no more. Meanwhile, this
• 37:09
  Speaker 1: nigga making jokes by how he looks younger than me,
• 37:11
  Speaker 1: and shit, because you are literally stealing my life force, right,
• 37:16
  Speaker 1: you know, because women we give a lot of ourselves
• 37:19
  Speaker 1: a lot of times, you know what I'm saying to
• 37:21
  Speaker 1: our partners. So I just don't know where the narrative
• 37:24
  Speaker 1: comes from that black women don't build with black men.
• 37:27
  Speaker 1: I just don't know where the fuck that came from.
• 37:30
  Speaker 1: If there's a lot of women who stopped, Okay, we
• 37:33
  Speaker 1: only concerned about ourselves now mm hmm, But there are
• 37:37
  Speaker 1: a lot of women out here who still.
• 37:43
  Speaker 3: I think it's okay. I you know, I'm definitely open
• 37:46
  Speaker 3: to it. I would definitely want to build with a
• 37:47
  Speaker 3: black man. I want to create legacy and build something.
• 37:51
  Speaker 3: I just don't It has to be a healthy balance
• 37:53
  Speaker 3: where I'm not lost in the sauce, you know, where
• 37:57
  Speaker 3: I'm so overcome with your goals and dreams that I
• 38:00
  Speaker 3: forget my own. That's what I'm afraid of. You know
• 38:03
  Speaker 3: that also happens with women who become mothers. You know,
• 38:07
  Speaker 3: they get so caught up in being a good mom
• 38:12
  Speaker 3: that they forget themselves.
• 38:15
  Speaker 1: I think what most women are looking for is just reciprocity.
• 38:19
  Speaker 1: Like you know what I'm saying. We just wanted to
• 38:20
  Speaker 1: be reciprocal. If I do a few, you do for me, Like,
• 38:23
  Speaker 1: why can it not be like that? It's like a
• 38:24
  Speaker 1: lot of men are looking for therapists and they're also
• 38:27
  Speaker 1: looking for a secretary get somebody to do busy work
• 38:31
  Speaker 1: for them, things that they don't feel like doing, even
• 38:33
  Speaker 1: when you already have a whole plate full of shit
• 38:36
  Speaker 1: as an adult to do, you know, because let's not
• 38:39
  Speaker 1: forget we work also we do shit. And then now
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: it comes to Robin played by Leila Rashwan. So she
• 38:50
  Speaker 1: just has all these like casual relationships and shit. I
• 38:53
  Speaker 1: think she has a problem like establishing what her self
• 38:58
  Speaker 1: worth actually is and it comes out in promiscuity. Right,
• 39:03
  Speaker 1: So I think nearing the end of the movie you
• 39:05
  Speaker 1: kind of see where she just I'm done with this shit.
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: I might to be by myself.
• 39:12
  Speaker 3: She just wanted to be love and she was a
• 39:14
  Speaker 3: bit naive too.
• 39:18
  Speaker 1: You think he's sole about wallet, Yes, bitch, yes, it's
• 39:25
  Speaker 1: like that bigga stole three to five dollars out my
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: damn poker book while he was giving me some head,
• 39:30
  Speaker 1: same shit.
• 39:31
  Speaker 3: Enjoying their little life while you care, girlfriend. What a
• 39:35
  Speaker 3: low life while you care girlfriend? And see it's the
• 39:39
  Speaker 3: it's the characters like Robin.
• 39:41
  Speaker 1: Right. She she actually, you know what, expressed how she
• 39:44
  Speaker 1: wanted a relationship, how she wanted to be loved. Now
• 39:46
  Speaker 1: we got the whole fucking nigga culture out here now.
• 39:49
  Speaker 1: But y'all are having kids for these men, right, y'all
• 39:53
  Speaker 1: too want to be loved. That's really what women want.
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: So while you out here, yeah, so why are you
• 39:59
  Speaker 1: out here saying? You know you're doing it for me?
• 40:02
  Speaker 1: You fucking all these niggas for you? You sure?
• 40:04
  Speaker 3: Right?
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: Are you really sure? You know what I'm saying? Like, Yeah,
• 40:08
  Speaker 1: I'm all for a woman empowerment and you know, being
• 40:13
  Speaker 1: able to do whatever you want to do with your huha.
• 40:15
  Speaker 1: That is absolutely fine. But let's go back to earlier
• 40:19
  Speaker 1: we talked back HOWE doesn't heal period?
• 40:24
  Speaker 3: Okay, I listen everybody that I got, I take it
• 40:27
  Speaker 3: back right now, every single one of us.
• 40:29
  Speaker 1: You hear me. I feel like, who the fuck would
• 40:33
  Speaker 1: I keep on the rgenda? Like nobody, nobody, you know
• 40:38
  Speaker 1: what I'm saying. I don't feel like I missed out
• 40:40
  Speaker 1: on anybody I ever been with, period, And I could
• 40:47
  Speaker 1: still get the niggas back if I wanted.
• 40:49
  Speaker 3: To listen and not saying that everybody was just awful
• 40:52
  Speaker 3: human beings. It just was a waste of agenda. So
• 40:55
  Speaker 3: waste of my agenda for my agenda. All right. Then
• 40:59
  Speaker 3: there was Gloria Gloria was one of my favorite characters
• 41:05
  Speaker 3: because such a mama. She's such a mama bear, not
• 41:09
  Speaker 3: just to her son but to all of them. Seem
• 41:14
  Speaker 3: like right, yeah, And.
• 41:18
  Speaker 1: She liked the senior friend. I don't know if she
• 41:20
  Speaker 1: was on the same age with them or not, but
• 41:22
  Speaker 1: she just always seems so much older than any role
• 41:24
  Speaker 1: she plays Loretta divine.
• 41:27
  Speaker 3: But I think once you become a mama, sometimes happens
• 41:30
  Speaker 3: to you. You already just that role happens where you
• 41:33
  Speaker 3: just kind of calm down, become the mama bear for everybody.
• 41:36
  Speaker 3: Sometimes you out here with kids.
• 41:39
  Speaker 1: And she had the oldest well between her and Bernardine,
• 41:42
  Speaker 1: I think they were only two with kids and her
• 41:44
  Speaker 1: son was older. So that, you know, lead us to
• 41:47
  Speaker 1: believe that she got probably married young, had the child,
• 41:50
  Speaker 1: and now she's fine in love later on in.
• 41:53
  Speaker 3: Life, right, And then having her ex, the person that
• 41:57
  Speaker 3: she you know, looks too for Roman tell her that
• 42:01
  Speaker 3: he's now gay. On that part, she was like, you
• 42:05
  Speaker 3: don't have to pretend to be You don't got to
• 42:07
  Speaker 3: do all of that, nigga. You know, I'm not joking,
• 42:11
  Speaker 3: It's is serious. You know, I've been bisexual for a
• 42:14
  Speaker 3: long time. And now fully gay.
• 42:17
  Speaker 1: I forgot about that part, bitch. That is definitely some
• 42:22
  Speaker 1: nowadays type shit.
• 42:24
  Speaker 3: Mm hmm. That is so current, that's very current. It
• 42:27
  Speaker 3: was ahead of his time, actually.
• 42:30
  Speaker 1: But at least he was honest, you know, That's that
• 42:33
  Speaker 1: doesn't happen often nowadays. We find out in the clinic,
• 42:37
  Speaker 1: we find out from the from the men.
• 42:40
  Speaker 3: But you know, honestly, a lot of these women today,
• 42:43
  Speaker 3: I won't say a lot, but some, especially younger women,
• 42:45
  Speaker 3: are preferring that they man be bisexual or gay. What
• 42:48
  Speaker 3: it was Doci saying, like a red flag is a
• 42:52
  Speaker 3: straight man. She was being I hope she was being
• 42:55
  Speaker 3: sarcastic and not. I don't know.
• 42:58
  Speaker 1: Yeah, But even in that case, right, even though you
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: have women out here who are openly like accepting to
• 43:03
  Speaker 1: that type of situation, you still have the men being
• 43:06
  Speaker 1: deceitful because I think they get off on being sneaky.
• 43:10
  Speaker 1: You know, they still go after the women who are
• 43:12
  Speaker 1: okay with you. I'd be telling the truth, I'd be
• 43:18
  Speaker 1: telling the truth. I'm not being hard on them. These
• 43:20
  Speaker 1: are like the hard facts HIV and I'm listen, I'm
• 43:23
  Speaker 1: not trying to put that stigma on gay men. But
• 43:26
  Speaker 1: the statistic show. I saw some data that said seventy
• 43:32
  Speaker 1: two of trans women have HIV. That is high.
• 43:36
  Speaker 3: I need to see that. I don't know if that's true.
• 43:38
  Speaker 1: I swear to God. I swear to God my vagina.
• 43:43
  Speaker 3: Okay, yes, but I'm saying maybe the publication was reporting
• 43:48
  Speaker 3: some some things that might be not factual to promote,
• 43:52
  Speaker 3: like trans hate or something.
• 43:55
  Speaker 1: No, I don't think so. I think that ud. You
• 43:57
  Speaker 1: read that book back in the day, the d O
• 43:59
  Speaker 1: bro Dl brother.
• 44:01
  Speaker 3: Did you read that book? Dog?
• 44:02
  Speaker 1: That shit was so eye opening? Another other shit I
• 44:06
  Speaker 1: should probably not have been reading in twelfth grade problem,
• 44:08
  Speaker 1: I mean, why not? But was it that long ago?
• 44:12
  Speaker 1: I might have been in college at the time when
• 44:14
  Speaker 1: that book came out. But this is a supposed heterosexual
• 44:19
  Speaker 1: man who's now out right, and then he's talking about
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: that DL world Eric Jeron Dickie. I can't remember the guy.
• 44:28
  Speaker 1: I can't remember the author who wrote it ball head,
• 44:32
  Speaker 1: nice looking black man.
• 44:34
  Speaker 3: I think it might be that, but I might be wrong.
• 44:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but he he puts some stuff and now I'm like, yo,
• 44:40
  Speaker 1: this is fucking scary, you know, just like them not
• 44:44
  Speaker 1: wanting to use condoms, because then they are consciously now
• 44:49
  Speaker 1: you because you put that condom on, You're about to
• 44:51
  Speaker 1: have sex with this man. You are consciously making a
• 44:55
  Speaker 1: decision to have sex with a man. So they actually
• 44:58
  Speaker 1: were not having sex with me, because then they can
• 45:01
  Speaker 1: pretend like, I don't know, it's just like some old
• 45:04
  Speaker 1: out of body shit like it wasn't me, it was
• 45:08
  Speaker 1: the ship was deep. Okay, it was too deep, man.
• 45:13
  Speaker 1: I'm telling you, so who do you more? Who do
• 45:18
  Speaker 1: you more?
• 45:19
  Speaker 3: That's what I was about to ask you, Like which
• 45:21
  Speaker 3: one of you? If I had to identify with a
• 45:24
  Speaker 3: character most, I feel like I'm a hybrid. First of all,
• 45:27
  Speaker 3: there's a little bit of me and every one of
• 45:29
  Speaker 3: these characters can identify with all in certain ways. But
• 45:34
  Speaker 3: if I had to, it's not for Gloria because we
• 45:36
  Speaker 3: meant no kids for real. I guess no. But I
• 45:40
  Speaker 3: can't identify with being selfish. She's selfish with her son.
• 45:43
  Speaker 3: She wanted him to stay home, she didn't want him
• 45:45
  Speaker 3: to go out for New Year's Eve. You know, she
• 45:50
  Speaker 3: was always on him. You know, I can identify with
• 45:53
  Speaker 3: that because I can be like that, you know. But
• 45:56
  Speaker 3: I would have to say Robin and Savannah mostly being
• 46:03
  Speaker 3: gold driven and you know, want in love and trying
• 46:08
  Speaker 3: not to reconcile my career, my ambitions for a relationship,
• 46:12
  Speaker 3: but still wanting those things. And then Robin sometimes being
• 46:17
  Speaker 3: I know, I can be a hopeless romantic and be
• 46:20
  Speaker 3: a bit naive and try to like see everything through
• 46:25
  Speaker 3: rose colored glasses into instead of seeing things for what
• 46:29
  Speaker 3: they really are sometimes because it's just better to like
• 46:32
  Speaker 3: be in this fairy tale than to be in a reality.
• 46:36
  Speaker 3: I definitely can identify with Robin with that now, with
• 46:39
  Speaker 3: that stealing money out my purse. Oh no, that's where
• 46:44
  Speaker 3: I dont lie. You know, I lost your minds them.
• 46:47
  Speaker 1: I definitely think I'm a hybrid between Savannah and Robin
• 46:50
  Speaker 1: as well, with a little dash of Bernardine because I
• 46:53
  Speaker 1: won't help a nigga build some shit, right. I think
• 46:57
  Speaker 1: I'm more Savannah when I'm in a relationship gun and
• 47:01
  Speaker 1: I'm more Robbing when I'm single, because when I'm single,
• 47:05
  Speaker 1: I give myself a mission to do all the things.
• 47:07
  Speaker 1: But I am simultaneously looking for love, like I'm looking
• 47:10
  Speaker 1: for another relationship. May not be consciously looking, and things
• 47:16
  Speaker 1: might just happen, but I and I already kind of
• 47:18
  Speaker 1: be knowing, like where I want to go at next too.
• 47:21
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I bet I know you.
• 47:26
  Speaker 1: But look, this is the first time in life I'm
• 47:28
  Speaker 1: really like, you know, if this current relationship doesn't work out,
• 47:31
  Speaker 1: I'm cool. I swear. That's where I'm at, Like, I'm
• 47:34
  Speaker 1: really cool on you know. If something happens, something happens.
• 47:38
  Speaker 1: If it doesn't, it doesn't, I'm not actively This shit
• 47:42
  Speaker 1: is not easy, dog, Okay, it's not easy.
• 47:47
  Speaker 3: It's not so.
• 47:49
  Speaker 1: I mean, I feel like this would be my last
• 47:51
  Speaker 1: relationship honestly that I would like actively be trying to pursue.
• 47:56
  Speaker 1: I don't give a fuck.
• 47:57
  Speaker 3: I don't believe that.
• 47:58
  Speaker 1: I swear to God, girl, you is the love of girl.
• 48:01
  Speaker 3: The fuck you talk about?
• 48:06
  Speaker 1: You know, life is this life, especially in America, it's
• 48:09
  Speaker 1: just based off of double occupancy. You are not supposed
• 48:12
  Speaker 1: to be out here trying to do it by yourself. Okay,
• 48:15
  Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. So I have always been
• 48:18
  Speaker 1: looking for a teammate, a real life teammate, and I
• 48:22
  Speaker 1: just never got that for real. Out of any of
• 48:24
  Speaker 1: my partners. The closest I got to it was was
• 48:27
  Speaker 1: the guy I was going to marry, but he was
• 48:32
  Speaker 1: just not a good manager. You know, these niggas want
• 48:34
  Speaker 1: to lead, like you, you are not a good manager.
• 48:36
  Speaker 1: Your fucking employees be trying to get the fuck from
• 48:37
  Speaker 1: around you too, Like you're just not a good manager.
• 48:41
  Speaker 1: So I am somebody who could be led if you
• 48:43
  Speaker 1: leading me in the right direction. And I also want
• 48:46
  Speaker 1: somebody who can be led, like I want to be
• 48:48
  Speaker 1: able to teach and be taught. That's what I would
• 48:50
  Speaker 1: like in a relationship.
• 48:53
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's fair. I definitely want somebody to steer the ship.
• 48:56
  Speaker 3: I don't want to be in charge.
• 48:57
  Speaker 1: You say that until it happens. Girl, That's exactly what
• 49:01
  Speaker 1: I tell my mom, Like my stepdaddy is made for you. Okay,
• 49:05
  Speaker 1: you think you want a strong man, you're not gonna
• 49:09
  Speaker 1: be able to do the type of ship to them
• 49:12
  Speaker 1: that you think.
• 49:13
  Speaker 3: I don't want to do the type of ship. I
• 49:15
  Speaker 3: want someone. I've been the captain of this ship for
• 49:18
  Speaker 3: a long time. I want somebody to come and steer.
• 49:20
  Speaker 3: I want someone that I could be like, I trust
• 49:22
  Speaker 3: him to make good decisions. Now, I don't want like
• 49:25
  Speaker 3: a dictator. I don't want to like.
• 49:29
  Speaker 1: It's a thin line, like for real, Like it's just
• 49:33
  Speaker 1: I just haven't been able to find that sweet spot,
• 49:35
  Speaker 1: like the middle ground. Yeah, it's either they leaning on
• 49:38
  Speaker 1: you too much or they bullying you. Like the fuck,
• 49:43
  Speaker 1: where is the sweet spot?
• 49:45
  Speaker 3: That's what I want, the sweet spot. Someone who can
• 49:46
  Speaker 3: trust my counsel, but you know, has a good uh
• 49:52
  Speaker 3: a good decision maker, you know. Yeah, yeah, that's what
• 49:57
  Speaker 3: I would like. One thing I want to say is
• 50:04
  Speaker 3: that I can appreciate from this movie is because they
• 50:07
  Speaker 3: had some fucked up scenarios going on, but it wasn't
• 50:10
  Speaker 3: no judgment amongst them. Like, there wasn't out there just
• 50:15
  Speaker 3: harshly judging each other. And we didn't see them talking
• 50:19
  Speaker 3: talking about each other behind their back and see none
• 50:23
  Speaker 3: of that you ladies, y'all be doing that to y'all friends,
• 50:26
  Speaker 3: y'all been a job.
• 50:29
  Speaker 1: So let's just get into like that. Then let's just
• 50:31
  Speaker 1: get into like how important, like the like just the
• 50:35
  Speaker 1: power of female friendships are because you got a lot
• 50:37
  Speaker 1: of women out here to be like I just got homeboys,
• 50:41
  Speaker 1: like girl, get you're ugly.
• 50:43
  Speaker 3: Right, female friends. That's a red flag for me because
• 50:47
  Speaker 3: how you don't have no sisters. I love my girls,
• 50:50
  Speaker 3: I love you. You know, I want us to be great.
• 50:55
  Speaker 3: I I you know, I ain't gonna sit here a
• 50:59
  Speaker 3: lot I have talked shit like I would be like.
• 51:03
  Speaker 1: It ain't shit. You ain't gonna talk to them too,
• 51:05
  Speaker 1: that you wouldn't talk to them?
• 51:07
  Speaker 3: No, probably I already talked to them, and now I'm
• 51:10
  Speaker 3: vitting to somebody else. Why we argue about the ship.
• 51:13
  Speaker 3: I said, now one thing I'm gonna do. I'm gonna
• 51:15
  Speaker 3: say what I'm gonna say. Now, you know, I don't
• 51:16
  Speaker 3: really like throw the rock and hote my hand type
• 51:19
  Speaker 3: of girl. I'm gonna definitely say what I Yeah, I
• 51:21
  Speaker 3: said that, Yeah, I said it. I said to you first,
• 51:25
  Speaker 3: you know, like you know, so you don't have to
• 51:27
  Speaker 3: question that, which is a gift and a curse too,
• 51:32
  Speaker 3: because sometimes shit don't need to be said to them
• 51:34
  Speaker 3: or nobody. You know.
• 51:37
  Speaker 1: See you have a friend group where everybody is like
• 51:43
  Speaker 1: a bunch of people in the friend group, right See,
• 51:46
  Speaker 1: I don't really have that anymore. It's like it's splintered now.
• 51:49
  Speaker 1: So I got like friends from high school. I got
• 51:51
  Speaker 1: my best friend from high school, and then I have
• 51:53
  Speaker 1: my couple friends from college who not like there was
• 51:56
  Speaker 1: a group, right but some are gone and then some
• 51:59
  Speaker 1: still here that I still communicate with. Where we don't
• 52:01
  Speaker 1: communicate with the other people that's out the group, you
• 52:04
  Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. So it's kind of splintered my
• 52:06
  Speaker 1: friend my friend groups. But then I have like one
• 52:08
  Speaker 1: off people like my homegirl Killer who I met when
• 52:11
  Speaker 1: I lived in Saint Louis, Like she know everybody fucking business,
• 52:15
  Speaker 1: but I don't necessarily tell people her business, you know
• 52:17
  Speaker 1: what I'm saying, Like, because these people ain't gonna never
• 52:19
  Speaker 1: meet no way. So if I'm vtting about some shit
• 52:22
  Speaker 1: that a friend from this other friend group did, like
• 52:25
  Speaker 1: there would be no reason for Kayla to ever give
• 52:27
  Speaker 1: me this to this person. Yeah, you know what I'm saying.
• 52:30
  Speaker 1: So I never like talking shit with roommate. Yes, I
• 52:36
  Speaker 1: don't really have a friend group to talk shit about
• 52:38
  Speaker 1: a friend then where everybody knows that person. Yeah, you
• 52:42
  Speaker 1: see what I'm saying, And.
• 52:43
  Speaker 3: That can become a problem. It can become a big
• 52:47
  Speaker 3: problem when you have like a friend group and y'all
• 52:50
  Speaker 3: vent to each other about shit with each other. I've
• 52:52
  Speaker 3: seen that.
• 52:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, so that is a that is a plus.
• 52:56
  Speaker 1: That is the thing that we saw on the show
• 52:57
  Speaker 1: where black women were really showing up for each other
• 53:00
  Speaker 1: in her real way and not beating each other backs
• 53:02
  Speaker 1: and on the lower because even need that.
• 53:05
  Speaker 3: Even the scene when Gloria, Loretta Devine and Savannah Whitney
• 53:10
  Speaker 3: Houston were on the ferris wheel and she was like,
• 53:15
  Speaker 3: can I ask you a question? She was like, did
• 53:19
  Speaker 3: you get with Herbert? She was like, I needed to
• 53:25
  Speaker 3: get late, so I did. She's like, now he come
• 53:28
  Speaker 3: into my house calling all times to night, like Herbert wanted.
• 53:32
  Speaker 1: That pussy again bad.
• 53:35
  Speaker 3: But Gloria definitely was disappointed in her, but she didn't
• 53:41
  Speaker 3: treat her poorly or call her a hole or beat
• 53:44
  Speaker 3: her down. Ask her friend, and y'all do that to
• 53:47
  Speaker 3: each other. You gotta start.
• 53:51
  Speaker 1: And I mean, as a woman, I just don't know
• 53:54
  Speaker 1: how you get through life without like just some type
• 53:58
  Speaker 1: of support system from other women. You know what I'm saying.
• 54:01
  Speaker 1: We all be going through some of the same similar shit.
• 54:03
  Speaker 1: I remember my homegirl when I left my ex, like
• 54:06
  Speaker 1: she had left hers first. She left her dude first, right,
• 54:10
  Speaker 1: so it's like we were like bonding over these narks essentially, right,
• 54:16
  Speaker 1: she left hers. I left mine for real and I
• 54:18
  Speaker 1: was done. I was fucking done. But she went back.
• 54:20
  Speaker 1: I'm like, bitch, wit you breaking the cold? What happened?
• 54:24
  Speaker 1: You know? But I still supported her and going back,
• 54:26
  Speaker 1: and I still you know when she had had still
• 54:29
  Speaker 1: ongoing bullshit with this person that she was still because
• 54:31
  Speaker 1: they were married, so it was a little bit different, right,
• 54:33
  Speaker 1: I didn't get to the marriage stage. She was actually
• 54:35
  Speaker 1: married to this person, right, so you know, I was
• 54:38
  Speaker 1: still listening to her when she was going through all
• 54:40
  Speaker 1: the things. Never judged her, none of that shit. Like, girl,
• 54:43
  Speaker 1: I understand, I get it, I understand it. But in
• 54:46
  Speaker 1: the back of my mind, I'm like, what the fuck
• 54:47
  Speaker 1: did you go back? It wasn't gonna be any different.
• 54:50
  Speaker 1: I really don't think people change much when you get
• 54:53
  Speaker 1: to a certain age. So you know what I'm saying, Like,
• 54:55
  Speaker 1: if you change, it's not gonna be for you, it's
• 54:57
  Speaker 1: gonna be for the next woman, right.
• 54:59
  Speaker 3: Were the same person, they may not change. Yeah.
• 55:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah, So we want to know from y'all, like tell
• 55:04
  Speaker 1: us the time, like where one of your homegirls like
• 55:07
  Speaker 1: have helped you through a really tough time. They don't
• 55:09
  Speaker 1: even have to be about relationships with a man or
• 55:12
  Speaker 1: a woman whatever, because you know, y'all, y'all motherfuckers is gay.
• 55:18
  Speaker 1: I know anything. I know it's fun. It's fun because
• 55:25
  Speaker 1: I just be playing that's right. But yeah, so which
• 55:29
  Speaker 1: friend do you think you are and your friend group?
• 55:32
  Speaker 1: Based on these characters?
• 55:34
  Speaker 3: Which friend do I think I am? Yeah, I'm definitely Gloria.
• 55:41
  Speaker 3: As a friend, I'm definitely Gloria.
• 55:44
  Speaker 1: Oh and I'm Robin because I'll be ready to like
• 55:47
  Speaker 1: call this ain't John bitch.
• 55:49
  Speaker 3: I'll be definitely the one on the phone. Cut some
• 55:51
  Speaker 3: motherfucker out by my friend. Put me on the phone,
• 55:54
  Speaker 3: give me the phone. I'm so I'm robbing in that way.
• 55:58
  Speaker 3: But I'm definitely Gloria in the I can be like
• 56:01
  Speaker 3: very nurturing and I get real motherly on my friends.
• 56:03
  Speaker 3: Come lay on my shoulder. Here's my shoulder. We're gonna
• 56:07
  Speaker 3: get through this together. I love you and I'm gonna
• 56:08
  Speaker 3: support you hugely and you're gonna feel it. So I
• 56:12
  Speaker 3: think i'm that too.
• 56:14
  Speaker 1: I think I'm Bernardine and Robin. I just like how
• 56:19
  Speaker 1: angry Bernardine was, Like that's high being when I get
• 56:23
  Speaker 1: to level ten for real, like you said, as a friend, Yeah,
• 56:26
  Speaker 1: I know, as I'm just thinking about, like, yeah, still
• 56:30
  Speaker 1: bitch as a friend, but Bernadine got angry as a friend,
• 56:35
  Speaker 1: I ain't see that. I will get angry and blow
• 56:39
  Speaker 1: up my friend. Car up, I'm just playing you ain't bitch, No,
• 56:47
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 56:49
  Speaker 3: I don't know.
• 56:49
  Speaker 1: I think that for whatever reason, I feel like I
• 56:54
  Speaker 1: probably possess all these women, you know what I'm saying,
• 56:59
  Speaker 1: and some type of ways. As a friend, would I
• 57:03
  Speaker 1: be asking Gloria like did you fuck that nigga? And
• 57:06
  Speaker 1: absolutely I'm the friend that keeps tally of the niggas
• 57:09
  Speaker 1: you've had sex with. So when you forget and act
• 57:12
  Speaker 1: like you ain't ever cheat on your nigga, I'm like, bitch,
• 57:14
  Speaker 1: you remember. See that's what I don't tell you all
• 57:16
  Speaker 1: about whole facts right there? Girls, I'd be like I
• 57:21
  Speaker 1: telling y'all listen, I got a home. Girl ass just
• 57:25
  Speaker 1: be lying to me like, which, I know you our
• 57:27
  Speaker 1: whole lives?
• 57:28
  Speaker 3: Like, girl, shut up, I forgot.
• 57:33
  Speaker 1: And here I am going through my notes on my
• 57:35
  Speaker 1: phone up phone on January twenty nineteen, girl, and with
• 57:45
  Speaker 1: my whole whole facts. I'm not friend, okay, In case
• 57:49
  Speaker 1: you forgot, I'm your whole facts, your whole fact checker. Yes,
• 57:56
  Speaker 1: I think I probably am. I'm probably all of them
• 57:58
  Speaker 1: wrapped up in one. I'm gonna be nurturing you know what,
• 58:01
  Speaker 1: I'm saying, like like Gloria is could be serious, like Savannah,
• 58:07
  Speaker 1: I could be ditsy like a Robin, you know what
• 58:09
  Speaker 1: I'm saying, not knowing what the fuck is going on,
• 58:12
  Speaker 1: but not so much.
• 58:13
  Speaker 3: But ready to turn up. Robin be the one that's
• 58:16
  Speaker 3: that's me. And but you like, don't do that, y'all,
• 58:20
  Speaker 3: like it's not worth it. So I guess you know,
• 58:24
  Speaker 3: it's a little bit of every character in us.
• 58:26
  Speaker 1: All. Yeah, Bernadette a little sneaky, she'd be done. She
• 58:30
  Speaker 1: didn't even tell her friends about it. And until somebody
• 58:32
  Speaker 1: asked about that, shit, that's me.
• 58:33
  Speaker 3: Who are gonna tell her that nobody heard? Yeah, that's
• 58:37
  Speaker 3: me a little bit.
• 58:38
  Speaker 1: So I don't know. Do you think any of them
• 58:42
  Speaker 1: had like some who had the most red flags as
• 58:45
  Speaker 1: a woman, like you would think Robin Robin had the
• 58:50
  Speaker 1: most red flags?
• 58:52
  Speaker 3: What do you mean like when you say red flags?
• 58:54
  Speaker 3: Like was she the most toxic or was she yeah,
• 58:57
  Speaker 3: the most toxic? Shit both?
• 59:00
  Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, Because you know, any I
• 59:02
  Speaker 1: really feel like when you fuck with anybody, it's like
• 59:04
  Speaker 1: a small aspect of who you are too. That's even
• 59:06
  Speaker 1: with friends like me and you friends because there's a
• 59:09
  Speaker 1: part of you that I'm like, you see what I'm saying.
• 59:12
  Speaker 1: So even with Robin fucking these dudes like that was
• 59:15
  Speaker 1: still an aspect of her, Like however they were, was
• 59:18
  Speaker 1: an aspect of her. You are who you beat basically.
• 59:22
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know. I guess they all were equally
• 59:27
  Speaker 3: toxic in their own way. I don't feel like anybody
• 59:29
  Speaker 3: was more toxic than the other. And in terms of
• 59:32
  Speaker 3: how they dealt with their situations, they were just women
• 59:36
  Speaker 3: trying to figure it out. Man.
• 59:38
  Speaker 1: So Robin, like she just always like was entertaining men
• 59:41
  Speaker 1: that just weren't emotionally available.
• 59:44
  Speaker 3: Yeah. Character what was his name.
• 59:51
  Speaker 1: I don't know, Eric, the men the.
• 59:53
  Speaker 3: Dark skinned one, she was like fat fuck.
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 1: So. There was a Kenneth, there was a John, there
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 1: was a Rustle, and there was a Troy.
• 1:00:05
  Speaker 3: Troy, that's that's not Troy was the one Marvin have
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 3: a fruit bowl, bitch.
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 2: That was.
• 1:00:13
  Speaker 1: A rebound disaster.
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 3: It was the guy that worked with her that he
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 3: was like, I own a house in Scottsdale. She's like,
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 3: I want to go on vacations and dinner and you know,
• 1:00:25
  Speaker 3: like I want to be happy. When she was in
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 3: the bed with him. He was like, oh, coming him,
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 3: what was his name? I don't remember. I don't know, yeah,
• 1:00:39
  Speaker 3: I can't remember. But that was another time where Gloria
• 1:00:42
  Speaker 3: was like, well, remember you broke up with him, so
• 1:00:44
  Speaker 3: don't embarrass us and don't embarrass yourself. Just be a
• 1:00:47
  Speaker 3: motherly yes, don't forget bitch, right, like the only one
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 3: that was like stable and like could have taken her serious.
• 1:01:01
  Speaker 1: But she didn't like him, you see, because she liked
• 1:01:04
  Speaker 1: the emotionally unavailable men.
• 1:01:07
  Speaker 3: So right, don't look at me, bitch.
• 1:01:11
  Speaker 1: I know.
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 3: That's why I said her in so many ways only
• 1:01:20
  Speaker 3: except for the money part, the nigga stealing from me
• 1:01:24
  Speaker 3: because I hold lodallar so tight, the eagle scream on
• 1:01:28
  Speaker 3: that bitch, do not play with me by my money.
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 1: Shame. So let's just let's quickly go through like the
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 1: different archetypes of these men, right quick, and wrap this
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 1: shit the fuck up. So Kenneth was the married manipulator, okay, charming,
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 1: emotionally manipulative, and full of all the fucking empty promises.
• 1:01:51
  Speaker 1: He even convinced, go ahead.
• 1:01:53
  Speaker 3: I was gonna say, you went to so self righteous
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 3: when you were fucking my brains out.
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 1: So he convinced Savannah that that she's special while refusing
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 1: to leave his wife. Right, so he just wanted her
• 1:02:05
  Speaker 1: to wait to side. I mean, Whitney Houston had a
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 1: whole song about it. How the song go, the sidebitch
• 1:02:11
  Speaker 1: song with East.
• 1:02:12
  Speaker 3: Oh, you're talking about the best side bitch anthem. First
• 1:02:15
  Speaker 3: of all, I did not know that was a sidebach
• 1:02:18
  Speaker 3: anthem until I got always knew. I always knew stolen moments.
• 1:02:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you got your family and they need just.
• 1:02:33
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's what she may be in the sidebach sounds
• 1:02:36
  Speaker 3: so beautiful.
• 1:02:37
  Speaker 1: I know, it was so nice.
• 1:02:38
  Speaker 3: We forgot.
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 1: We didn't listen to the words. It's just sounding an
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 1: angel singing about side bitch activity.
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 3: About being in love with side digetivities.
• 1:02:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so Kenneth was full of shit, Okay, but.
• 1:02:52
  Speaker 3: The way I just feel like the way Savannah fans
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 3: on him at the at the pool side, you ain't
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 3: had to do all of that because you was complicit
• 1:03:03
  Speaker 3: to this very moment, and now you so she wasn't. Yeah,
• 1:03:06
  Speaker 3: but why are you not going to drink on him though?
• 1:03:09
  Speaker 3: Just say you don't want to be involved no more
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 3: and go, because you was complicit the whole time and
• 1:03:12
  Speaker 3: he was okay with it, quiet while he on the
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 3: phone with his bitch. Now you're mad, and now you're
• 1:03:17
  Speaker 3: gonna throw a drink on him. I don't understand that.
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 1: Part, because he was selling her a dream. Like you know,
• 1:03:24
  Speaker 1: she probably initially started off being quiet, you know, while
• 1:03:27
  Speaker 1: he on the phone, because he's supposed to eventually leave
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 1: her for Savannah, leave his wife.
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 3: Or then he said another baby on the way.
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah, she just was aggravated and probably more mad at
• 1:03:40
  Speaker 1: herself than him.
• 1:03:40
  Speaker 3: That's that's who she should have been mad at, right.
• 1:03:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so John John was like a He was like
• 1:03:46
  Speaker 1: a selfish ass fucking narcissist right exactly, dismissive of his
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 1: partner's sacrifices and financial financially controlling. Uh, And he.
• 1:03:59
  Speaker 4: Leaves the motherfucking purple and fluid, and he leaves her,
• 1:04:07
  Speaker 4: He leaves Bernandine for a younger woman with no remorse
• 1:04:10
  Speaker 4: at all.
• 1:04:10
  Speaker 1: He was cold as fuck, a younger white woman at that.
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 1: But he would be dead today.
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 3: To be better if you were black.
• 1:04:21
  Speaker 1: Oh you know all the scenes, you are really in
• 1:04:25
  Speaker 1: that job.
• 1:04:26
  Speaker 3: I love I love movies, you know I love movies.
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 1: Russell. He is the he's a bachelor, sing soccer, emotionally unavailable,
• 1:04:38
  Speaker 1: commitment phobic. He uses this charm to get robbed in
• 1:04:41
  Speaker 1: a psycle of hope and disappointment. Child, we don't need you,
• 1:04:49
  Speaker 1: he was, and look, yeah, the modern equivalent to him
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 1: would be like the person who avoids the labels. You know,
• 1:04:57
  Speaker 1: I talked about a person before we started recording, okay,
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 1: saying they're not ready for the relationship but still wants
• 1:05:03
  Speaker 1: the benefits of one. Right, Yeah, that's who Russell is.
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 1: So y'all a lot of y'all would Russell right the
• 1:05:10
  Speaker 1: fuck now?
• 1:05:11
  Speaker 3: Okay, a lot of y'all laying next to Russell right now.
• 1:05:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, And y'all really need to write Russell a letter
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 1: like Elementary and say check yes or no so you
• 1:05:20
  Speaker 1: can know what y'all got going on, because y'all just
• 1:05:23
  Speaker 1: farmers right now, they got going on.
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 3: They know.
• 1:05:28
  Speaker 1: Women don't be okay, women, do they really be knowing?
• 1:05:32
  Speaker 1: I feel like I be knowing right because I don't hallucinate.
• 1:05:37
  Speaker 1: But sometimes people can get things confused with raw sex, trips,
• 1:05:43
  Speaker 1: meeting families, meeting your children, all the things and the men,
• 1:05:47
  Speaker 1: and I ask you, what are we doing? What are
• 1:05:49
  Speaker 1: we It's like.
• 1:05:52
  Speaker 3: Farmers, we just fucking around.
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so I do think women get confused because because
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 1: why the man maybe like verbally saying one thing, he's
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 1: physically doing something else. And then Toy is just like
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 1: I said before, the rebound disaster. Okay, he's immature, he's reckless, disrespectful. Yeah,
• 1:06:16
  Speaker 1: Robin chaotic escape from her emotions, but it's not capable
• 1:06:20
  Speaker 1: of providing true partnership. He's just so, he's just that
• 1:06:24
  Speaker 1: nigga that he's the availability dick. Okay, you don't really
• 1:06:28
  Speaker 1: want him, and the man you really want ain't available
• 1:06:31
  Speaker 1: right now, so you're just settling for this bullshit and
• 1:06:35
  Speaker 1: hopefully eventually you can get the fuck up out of there.
• 1:06:39
  Speaker 3: Yeah, he was trying to get her to meet his
• 1:06:40
  Speaker 3: mama and his son, and they had only been talking
• 1:06:43
  Speaker 3: for three weeks or something like that. It wasn't even
• 1:06:45
  Speaker 3: that long, yep.
• 1:06:49
  Speaker 1: And then you got Gloria, right, Gloria has Marvin. They
• 1:06:53
  Speaker 1: have him labeled as a genuine healer. Okay, he's supportive, patient,
• 1:06:57
  Speaker 1: emotionally mature. He genuinely it cares for Gloria without manipulation
• 1:07:02
  Speaker 1: or self selfish motives. So like a modern day equivalent
• 1:07:06
  Speaker 1: to him would be just an emotionally secure partner who's
• 1:07:09
  Speaker 1: ready for a committed relationship. And a lot of women
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 1: ask for that. But I do also believe there's a
• 1:07:14
  Speaker 1: lot of women, a lot of women ain't ready for it.
• 1:07:16
  Speaker 1: A lot of women say they want a man that's
• 1:07:18
  Speaker 1: emotionally intelligent. But he gonna call you fat. He's gonna
• 1:07:21
  Speaker 1: tell you, baby, you need to work out, baby, he's
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 1: going no, absolutely, he ain't gonna call you fat. He
• 1:07:29
  Speaker 1: going come on, let's go to the gym, or or
• 1:07:32
  Speaker 1: he's gonna tell you when you not showing up right
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 1: completely for him.
• 1:07:36
  Speaker 3: And I'm to receive it our part, Yeah.
• 1:07:42
  Speaker 1: Are you able to receive an emotionally intelligent man? Because hey,
• 1:07:46
  Speaker 1: you can't show up as an arc with him, right, okay?
• 1:07:50
  Speaker 1: Because one thing about it, men are not dealing with
• 1:07:52
  Speaker 1: the ship that we deal with as women. They're not
• 1:07:54
  Speaker 1: doing it.
• 1:07:54
  Speaker 3: And when Margaret told her the truth about how she
• 1:07:56
  Speaker 3: was handling her son, she was mad. She could not
• 1:08:00
  Speaker 3: handle it. She spassed out, she crashed out, leave, go
• 1:08:04
  Speaker 3: get the fuck home, Go to your motherfucker house across
• 1:08:07
  Speaker 3: the street, because my son about to leave it. You
• 1:08:11
  Speaker 3: saying maybe he's not the one who needs to come
• 1:08:13
  Speaker 3: to his census. She's like, bitch, get out. You remember
• 1:08:17
  Speaker 3: that part m.
• 1:08:18
  Speaker 1: Hm, and what she had to do. Go back and
• 1:08:20
  Speaker 1: apologize that man.
• 1:08:21
  Speaker 3: Yeah, who's this good man? Because you're trying to be
• 1:08:26
  Speaker 3: attached to your son. Let that son go on mm hmm.
• 1:08:29
  Speaker 1: Let him love because how you who's the man in
• 1:08:32
  Speaker 1: the house. It's no room for me in here.
• 1:08:35
  Speaker 3: Marvin was played by Damn. Name is on the tip
• 1:08:41
  Speaker 3: of my tongue. He was a tap dancer. He's a
• 1:08:43
  Speaker 3: very talented tap dancer in the eighties and nineties. Fuck
• 1:08:50
  Speaker 3: that hurts my feelings. I don't know his name right now,
• 1:08:52
  Speaker 3: and be on tip of my tongue anytime. Gregory Hines yep,
• 1:08:56
  Speaker 3: mm hm, m hm, yep.
• 1:09:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah. So we want to know which friend are you? Which,
• 1:09:08
  Speaker 1: like just women are you in general when it comes
• 1:09:11
  Speaker 1: to relationships? Out of these characters, what else we want
• 1:09:14
  Speaker 1: to know?
• 1:09:14
  Speaker 3: Okay, So, no, we got some homework for y'all this week.
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 3: If y'all are journal girlies, even if you're not journal girlies,
• 1:09:21
  Speaker 3: let's start all right, So get into your journal and
• 1:09:25
  Speaker 3: right now, what's one toxic relationship pattern you're ready to
• 1:09:29
  Speaker 3: exhale from?
• 1:09:30
  Speaker 2: Mm?
• 1:09:32
  Speaker 3: Write that shit down? For yourself, girlfriend, And what about
• 1:09:37
  Speaker 3: writing down what would your waiting to exhale moment look
• 1:09:40
  Speaker 3: like for you? And what's going on in your life
• 1:09:45
  Speaker 3: and which character's journey inspires you the most? And why
• 1:09:49
  Speaker 3: journal it? Bitch?
• 1:09:51
  Speaker 1: I had that big town.
• 1:09:53
  Speaker 3: Yeah, let's get in. That's a good friend, thank you.
• 1:09:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yea, No, I'm gonna write my shit down. I
• 1:10:00
  Speaker 1: got a lot of toxic traits, deflection, all types of shit,
• 1:10:03
  Speaker 1: I know. But the thing is, i'd be consciously aware
• 1:10:05
  Speaker 1: of the things I can. I can tell you what
• 1:10:07
  Speaker 1: I did, And here's I actually like to tell people
• 1:10:11
  Speaker 1: what I did wrong first, even like, let me tell
• 1:10:14
  Speaker 1: you what I did first, and you tell me if
• 1:10:16
  Speaker 1: I'm tripping it or not. That's when I really start
• 1:10:17
  Speaker 1: with my shit, and then I'll tell you what else
• 1:10:19
  Speaker 1: happened after that? Okay, what could have possibly what I
• 1:10:22
  Speaker 1: could have possibly done to start the shit and maybe
• 1:10:26
  Speaker 1: avoided the shit? Right, It's what I'm gonna start with
• 1:10:29
  Speaker 1: most of the time.
• 1:10:30
  Speaker 3: So yeah, it's getting on our journals, girlies, and let's
• 1:10:33
  Speaker 3: write this shit down so we can be better.
• 1:10:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah, man, better friends, better lovers, y'all like this?
• 1:10:41
  Speaker 3: Yeah, this is fine, I know. Next week I want
• 1:10:44
  Speaker 3: to do I really want to get into a thin
• 1:10:48
  Speaker 3: line between eleve and hate. We need to talk about Brandy.
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 3: Can we do it?
• 1:10:55
  Speaker 1: We know of Brandy in real life too, same first
• 1:10:57
  Speaker 1: and last name. Yeah, yeah, we want to let us
• 1:11:03
  Speaker 1: know if y'all enjoyed this episode though, right, and we're
• 1:11:05
  Speaker 1: gonna I want to do it. We could do like
• 1:11:08
  Speaker 1: one more. We could break it down this ship, this
• 1:11:10
  Speaker 1: is This was fun to me.
• 1:11:11
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it was a lot of fun, all right, y'all.
• 1:11:14
  Speaker 1: So if you enjoy this episode, y'all, tune in every
• 1:11:16
  Speaker 1: Thursday and the Black Effect iHeart Radio app. Whoever the
• 1:11:19
  Speaker 1: fuck you get your podcast that. This is your co
• 1:11:21
  Speaker 1: host aj Holiday two point zero on Instagrams. We want
• 1:11:25
  Speaker 1: to see them them journals all right, kick journal injuries.
• 1:11:28
  Speaker 3: We want to see it and we want to read
• 1:11:30
  Speaker 3: it and be nosy y'all. Is official tam Bam on Instagram.
• 1:11:33
  Speaker 3: Please follow me. I love y'all so much. Thank y'all
• 1:11:36
  Speaker 3: for tuning in. Remember speak now.
• 1:11:40
  Speaker 1: And never hold your breath.
• 1:11:41
  Speaker 3: Okay, never hold your breath. Breathe, bitch, breathe.
• 1:11:45
  Speaker 1: Four more podcasts from iHeartRadio. Visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple
• 1:11:50
  Speaker 1: Podcasts or whatever. You listen to your favorite shows