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What Grief Taught Me About Life After Loss · Groove with Portia

• 0:06
  Speaker 1: Welcome to Group Porsche, the podcast that uncovers the hidden
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: treasures within grief. I'm your host, Porsche the Producer, and
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: I'm inviting you to join me on a transformative journey
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: where we were exchange laughter, of course the best medicine
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: of them all, reflect on cherish memories, remember that time
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: that the little boy grabbed my hand instead of his
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: mother's at the amusement park yikes, And of course, discover
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: gratitude while navigating one of life's hardest challenges lost. So
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: get ready to grow with me, Porsche the Producer, let's
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: dive in. Hello everybody, and welcome back to Grow with Porsche.
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: I am your host, Porsche Booker, and as always, don't
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: forget to like, share and subscribe to keep it with
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: the latest and greatest of all, with Grew with Porsche.
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: So today, everybody, One of the things that happened to
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: me earlier was I I said it on a virtual
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: celebration of life for one of our dear family members.
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  Speaker 1: And one of the things that I was reminded of
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  Speaker 1: is the importance of support and that continued bond with
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: our loved ones. Right because those of you know when
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: my mom made her transition. I said to her, mom,
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  Speaker 1: make sure you come visit me. And three days after
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  Speaker 1: she made her transition, a monarch butterfly was flying in
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  Speaker 1: my front yard. And so I just want to remind, you, know,
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  Speaker 1: remind each and every one of you today to just
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  Speaker 1: be open to how your loved one is going to
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  Speaker 1: come to you, and also be open to support, real
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  Speaker 1: support people who see you, who will hold space for
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  Speaker 1: you to just fall apart and be vulnerable. So today, everybody,
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  Speaker 1: I have the honor of being joined by woman who
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: was connected to me by my soul mother. Shout out
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  Speaker 1: to doctor don Earhart Whitty for being the most amazing
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: connector around the world. And this beautiful woman has also
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: experienced a transition into her life. One of her children
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: made his transition several years ago, and she is not
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: only kept in contact with him, but she's also created
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: her own way of honoring him and helping others through
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: the health and wellness space. So welcome, miss Katie Gilbertson
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: to grow with Porsche. How are you today, Katie?
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  Speaker 2: I'm good.
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  Speaker 3: Thank you so much for having me today, Porsche. It
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  Speaker 3: is such an honor to finally join you in this
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  Speaker 3: wonderful space.
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  Speaker 1: I know, and we've been trying to coordinate this forever, right,
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  Speaker 1: but you know, life and just things take different turns
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  Speaker 1: and all the things.
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  Speaker 3: Right.
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  Speaker 1: So, Katie, first starters for our audience who's tuning in.
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: What are you grateful for today?
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  Speaker 3: Oh?
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: What am I grateful for today?
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  Speaker 3: I think the time that I just had with my
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  Speaker 3: three year old son, being able to be at home
• 2:49
  Speaker 3: and have joy and laughter. It's been a bit of
• 2:52
  Speaker 3: an emotional day.
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: I think something.
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  Speaker 3: You know, something's definitely going on with the universe out there,
• 2:57
  Speaker 3: and the full moon coming up and just say transition
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  Speaker 3: into fall and just having him giggle and be so
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  Speaker 3: presant was just such a gift. So I'm so grateful
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  Speaker 3: that I get that time.
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: I agree with you, Katie, I've been feeling that too.
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  Speaker 1: Whatever's going on energetically, it's as though the cup or
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: the pot on the stove is boiling over with a
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: bunch of emotions. Like there was this anime that I
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: used to watch, like little diversion here. It was called
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  Speaker 1: Tenchi Mu Yoh, and there was a character in the show.
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: Her name was Rioko, and she couldn't taste she had
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: no taste buds, and so they had her cook dinner
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: one time and she was adding in all these weird
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: ingredients but because she couldn't taste, so she's adding like
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: pepsi in it, chicken, shrimp, just all the random things, right,
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  Speaker 1: And so I think it's kind of the same concept
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  Speaker 1: is we're filled with so many emotions, right the things
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  Speaker 1: that are going on in the world today. You know,
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: just what you see on social media, You're flooded and
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: bombarded at every angle. So it's like, you know, one
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  Speaker 1: minute you'll see the cute little cat video, then you'll
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: see something sad, and you'll see something make you laugh.
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  Speaker 1: So it's like your emotions are just not sure where.
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  Speaker 2: Did it go?
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  Speaker 3: And then they're same too with that change of the season.
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  Speaker 3: We're coming into the season of being like the trees
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  Speaker 3: and letting go, and yeah, we start to kind of
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  Speaker 3: like get root in and kind of shift into that time.
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  Speaker 2: It's when that stuff comes out.
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  Speaker 3: So it's like kind of like the you know, like
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  Speaker 3: the come down from the summer and we're coming back
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  Speaker 3: into ourselves, rooting down deep. But that is also when
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  Speaker 3: so much comes up and coming up to that, you
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  Speaker 3: know at the Halloween time, when you know, if you're
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  Speaker 3: looking at the veil between both worlds and so super
• 4:45
  Speaker 3: thins we start to feel things just that much more deeply,
• 4:48
  Speaker 3: which I also get excited about because it's that the
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  Speaker 3: thinnest time and the closest time we get to be
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  Speaker 3: with our loved ones.
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  Speaker 1: I agree, Okay, I love how you brought up to
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  Speaker 1: about the leave changing right and them falling off and
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: you know, going into slumber until next year for early spring,
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: and you know listening to the giggle of your your son,
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: your three year old son, Like, how often are we
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  Speaker 1: reminded to be present for those moments because they're not
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  Speaker 1: going to be little forever?
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  Speaker 2: No, It's oh, such a joy. I love that sound.
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  Speaker 1: I mean, who, Like, I have no kids, but I
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  Speaker 1: love being around kids, just you know, seeing how I'm
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: always fascinated, Katie, how kids learn to talk, Like, I'm
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: always fascinated about that because I'm like, are they you know?
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  Speaker 1: It's like parents, right, They they mimic what they see.
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  Speaker 3: Absolutely and it's really face to My youngest son, he
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  Speaker 3: has down syndrome, so with low muscle tone, it's taking
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  Speaker 3: longer to be able to form the words with his tongue.
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  Speaker 3: And when the words do come out, I'm like, oh
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  Speaker 3: my goodness, this is me is me, and even he's
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  Speaker 3: like hmm, I'm like, oh, I must go a lot.
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  Speaker 3: But I think it's something like the thing that's so
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  Speaker 3: beautiful about him in particular, and all children that in
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  Speaker 3: the now, they's nothing but right now.
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  Speaker 2: So whether it's you know, they can.
• 6:18
  Speaker 3: Move from crying one moment to overwhelm joy to screaming
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  Speaker 3: and running to you know, everything within the space of
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  Speaker 3: five minutes because it's what happened right then and there.
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  Speaker 2: Yes, I just love that.
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  Speaker 3: So it's constantly pulling me into into that moment, which.
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: You know, great Teddy. I'm curious because you you have
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  Speaker 1: a total of three children, correct, four four children total.
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  Speaker 1: One has physically transitioned, right, And I'm curious Jackson Jackson
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  Speaker 1: is your son that made his transition. I'm curious. Do
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  Speaker 1: you feel as though Fox has characteristics of Jackson?
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  Speaker 2: Oh?
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  Speaker 3: Percent, I think it's you know, I had a calling
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  Speaker 3: for Fox for a very very long time after Jackson
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  Speaker 3: passed away.
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  Speaker 2: It's been eleven years now.
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  Speaker 3: He transitioned and I had this such a strong calling
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  Speaker 3: and when I found out I was pregnant, I was
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  Speaker 3: actually pregnant with twins, and then that twin vanished, And
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  Speaker 3: I always found that he delivered him to me and
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  Speaker 3: made sure he was safe and sure that he was
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  Speaker 3: gonna shine through and come through strong. And his personality
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  Speaker 3: is so similar. He's so full of love, he's so
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  Speaker 3: full of joy. It reminds me so much of him.
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  Speaker 3: Jackson was quite similar to me, and so is Fox,
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  Speaker 3: and it's it's such a joy.
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  Speaker 2: He brings just that much more.
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  Speaker 1: Because Henny, I'm curious. I'm sure that you have pictures
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  Speaker 1: and things of Jackson around. Do you find like that Fox,
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  Speaker 1: if you're around pictures Jackson that he likes, smiles or
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  Speaker 1: does anything like uniques to him.
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  Speaker 2: He talks.
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  Speaker 3: Wow. Magnets on our fridge that our friend gifted us
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  Speaker 3: when Jackson transitioned.
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  Speaker 2: She asked for a photo.
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  Speaker 4: I'd only met her a couple of times, and.
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  Speaker 3: She got magnets and pins done of the same photo
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  Speaker 3: and so and made hundreds of them so we could
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  Speaker 3: give them.
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  Speaker 2: So he's currently around.
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  Speaker 3: The world on everyone's refrigerators, and Fox notices when he
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  Speaker 3: goes to someone's place that has them, and he gets
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  Speaker 3: really excited.
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  Speaker 1: Wow, he knows, And you know, that's what I love Katie, Right,
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  Speaker 1: is how little children cheap that curiosity bubble open, right,
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  Speaker 1: And it's as though when we become adults there's this oh,
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  Speaker 1: you have to grow up, you have to you know,
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  Speaker 1: let the imagination, you know, be closed behind doors. And
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  Speaker 1: I'm curious, Katie too. You said it's been eleven years
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  Speaker 1: since Jackson made him transition, and for our audience who's
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: tuning in, how old would Jackson have been this year?
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  Speaker 1: And when his transition anniversary and his birthday roll around,
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  Speaker 1: have you noticed a shift in how you honor his
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  Speaker 1: legacy and how others respond.
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  Speaker 4: So he would have turned twenty one this year.
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  Speaker 2: Wow, yeah, so I.
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  Speaker 1: Get to but wait, aren't you still twenty one?
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  Speaker 3: I think so much wiser I was then. But yeah,
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  Speaker 3: it was a real big milestone actually this year. And
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  Speaker 3: it was actually a great honor that one of my
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  Speaker 3: cousins actually was here and I haven't seen her in
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  Speaker 3: maybe twenty five years in person, and we celebrated, We
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  Speaker 3: had a party as you would have if he was here,
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  Speaker 3: and it was just such a beautiful connection. And his
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  Speaker 3: birthday's actually one day after my other son. It's always
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  Speaker 3: we always felt that those birthdays were together, so it
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  Speaker 3: was a continual celebration. It made it especially in the
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  Speaker 3: early days, it made it easy to transition and still celebrate.
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  Speaker 3: And then your other question on so what I call
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  Speaker 3: is angel versary that's at the start of the Year's
• 10:23
  Speaker 3: his birthdays March, and his angel versary is the end
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  Speaker 3: of January, and those days I find that much more connected.
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  Speaker 3: But what I find really interesting, particularly being a mum,
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  Speaker 3: is that you know, scallularly, when we carry out our children,
• 10:41
  Speaker 3: we get parts of their cells and they stay with
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  Speaker 3: us forever. And my body notices in both times, and
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  Speaker 3: it notices it differently. So when it's coming up to
• 10:52
  Speaker 3: his angel versary, my body starts aching through like the
• 10:57
  Speaker 3: trenth Ac count see but just below the ribcage the
• 11:00
  Speaker 3: tree of life. I start aching within there. Sometimes I'm
• 11:04
  Speaker 3: not aware of what the day is, and then I
• 11:07
  Speaker 3: kind of, you know, like, oh, that's coming up next week,
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  Speaker 3: and that was sort of that time when we knew
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  Speaker 3: he was about to transition. So I like viscerally and
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  Speaker 3: physically feel something happening before I notice what the date is.
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  Speaker 3: And then the same one as birthday, it's the same
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  Speaker 3: bit different because that was the day that the life came,
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  Speaker 3: So it's very similar, but one was a more connection
• 11:34
  Speaker 3: to that of like coming forth, and the other one
• 11:36
  Speaker 3: is a bit more of it being taken away. And
• 11:39
  Speaker 3: missing him physically is what that is, because spiritually I don't.
• 11:47
  Speaker 3: Spiritually he's always here. And I remember one really profound moment.
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  Speaker 3: It was very early on and I was in bed
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  Speaker 3: and I was just you know, in a moment of
• 11:58
  Speaker 3: devastation of just I miss you. I want to touch
• 12:03
  Speaker 3: you and smell you and feel you. And I was
• 12:07
  Speaker 3: lying in bed and one of my hands was up
• 12:09
  Speaker 3: and then I felt my hand being held and then
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  Speaker 3: I saw him, and he's just like, this is how
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  Speaker 3: I am now, Mom, I'm still here.
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  Speaker 2: I'm no different. I'm just in a different way.
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  Speaker 4: You know.
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  Speaker 3: Literally my body is not around anymore, but I am.
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  Speaker 3: And that holding of my hand and me witnessing that,
• 12:32
  Speaker 3: to know that he is still here, just different, was
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  Speaker 3: just so profound, And that moment of kind of desperation,
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  Speaker 3: I needed him and he showed.
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  Speaker 2: Up for me.
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  Speaker 1: Kay, you about to make tears run out of my
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: eyes because I have a very similar story. Shortly after
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: my mom made her transition, I remember we had went
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: and picked up her ashes from the funeral home, and
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: it's kind of like, this is the finite moment. Now
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: there's you know, no more paperwork and all that. This
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: is it physically, well, I just remember coming home exhausted.
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  Speaker 1: I think it was maybe about eight nine o'clock at night,
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: and when I laid down, I was just distraught. I
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: just was like, this can't be this. I'm like mad, this,
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  Speaker 1: give me something, show me. I feel broken. And Katie,
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: as I was laying down, and mind you, during the summer,
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: so it's hot, I felt my mom come and hug me.
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  Speaker 1: And you know, I normally sweat a lot, and you
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: know if it's hot, but it wasn't. I don't remember
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: it being hot that night, but I woke up sweating
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: and my pillow was wet because I was crying. But
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: I remember feeling her her presence because I could smell
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: her baby powder, I could smell her deodorant, so I
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: knew it was hurt.
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: Oh. I love that so much.
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  Speaker 3: And I think that's it the same as you needed
• 14:05
  Speaker 3: your mother's hug, I needed my child's hand. Yeah.
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  Speaker 1: And I think Katie is that reminder of being open,
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: you know, because as I brought up in the beginning right, kids,
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: and you said it with your youngest Fox. They're present
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  Speaker 1: in the moment.
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  Speaker 3: M right, so open, And I think that's the biggest
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  Speaker 3: part is with society, with schooling, how everything's kind of molded.
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  Speaker 2: We lose the essence.
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  Speaker 3: And as you said, imagination and those particular parts are
• 14:37
  Speaker 3: so incredibly important to nourish and nurture and allow space
• 14:43
  Speaker 3: for that to be because you then get to be
• 14:46
  Speaker 3: in touch with your intuition, be in touch with your
• 14:50
  Speaker 3: ancestors and those that walk before you. And what a
• 14:53
  Speaker 3: gift to be able to go through from being a
• 14:55
  Speaker 3: child into adulthood having that right support on that deep
• 15:02
  Speaker 3: level to follow your path rather than you know, for me,
• 15:08
  Speaker 3: it was very much not that way. It was don't
• 15:12
  Speaker 3: talk about that, that's not real. You know that those
• 15:15
  Speaker 3: aren't gifts, that that's not happening, and so I shut
• 15:18
  Speaker 3: it down and then it was a very lonely, lonely
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  Speaker 3: path to find my.
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  Speaker 2: Way back to that. But Jackson shed the shining light
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  Speaker 2: on that for me.
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  Speaker 1: And isn't it interesting, Katie, how a transition is a
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: birthplace for transformation within you.
• 15:38
  Speaker 2: One thousand percent.
• 15:39
  Speaker 3: I think that's that's something I didn't expect, and I
• 15:44
  Speaker 3: think a big part and people don't really tell you
• 15:47
  Speaker 3: when you birth a child, you transition and change.
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  Speaker 2: No one ever told me that happened.
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  Speaker 3: It was just will you'll be a mum. But I
• 15:56
  Speaker 3: was a whole new person. I had, you know, touched
• 16:00
  Speaker 3: you know, touched space with that thin veil between between
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  Speaker 3: life and death, and you know, to really feel that
• 16:09
  Speaker 3: space and to go sort of from that and then
• 16:14
  Speaker 3: you know, been grateful to have witnessed him transitioning. And
• 16:20
  Speaker 3: then what that did for me was something I really
• 16:24
  Speaker 3: didn't expect. But I'm so utterly grateful for that, because
• 16:30
  Speaker 3: if he hadn't come to me, and he hadn't have
• 16:33
  Speaker 3: left me, I would not be here now helping anyone else.
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  Speaker 2: I would not know who I am.
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  Speaker 4: He helped me find me, and that was through his transition.
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  Speaker 3: It was through his journey of cancer, of cancer for
• 16:46
  Speaker 3: five years and so half.
• 16:47
  Speaker 4: Of his lifetime, and that entire journey helped.
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  Speaker 3: Me heal myself and my wellness and therefore then be
• 16:57
  Speaker 3: able to do that. I was like, I haven't gone
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  Speaker 3: through this for no reason. There's a purpose in this,
• 17:05
  Speaker 3: And to then find that purpose and find my sole
• 17:08
  Speaker 3: purpose of why I'm here because of my son's transition.
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  Speaker 2: Like, I'm so grateful for that, Petty.
• 17:14
  Speaker 1: I'd love how you just said he helped me find me.
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: He helped me find me. And you know, I feel
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: the same about my mom. Her transition was for my transformation.
• 17:33
  Speaker 2: I love it so much.
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: Right, it was that giving you permission, maybe the permission
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: you never had, because again, what growing up we're told
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: to you have to put lose the imagination.
• 17:48
  Speaker 3: M M.
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: Grow up right to stop dreaming to you know, Oh,
• 17:53
  Speaker 1: there's no such thing as unicorns anymore, that you know
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: that whole thing. But it's like there's so many power
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: were for extraterrestrial things that happened divinely all the time.
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: Since my mom made her a transition, I feel like
• 18:10
  Speaker 1: I was opened up to a different lens of life
• 18:15
  Speaker 1: and appreciation for life because of her making her transition.
• 18:21
  Speaker 3: Absolutely there resonates so deeply, and then that I found
• 18:24
  Speaker 3: two my way that I moved through when other loved
• 18:29
  Speaker 3: ones have transitioned within It was within six months that
• 18:33
  Speaker 3: my grandmother transitioned after Jackson, and I was there supporting
• 18:38
  Speaker 3: both my grandfather and my grandmother, and his transition gave
• 18:43
  Speaker 3: me the space to help them through theirs because they
• 18:46
  Speaker 3: wouldn't talk about it. They were kind of like their
• 18:48
  Speaker 3: old school sort of thought, we're not going to talk
• 18:51
  Speaker 3: about it. Nothing happens after life. That's scared. I didn't
• 18:54
  Speaker 3: know how to talk about it, but I did. But
• 18:57
  Speaker 3: I didn't before that six months earlier, not And so
• 19:01
  Speaker 3: I felt he gave me that gift too, that I
• 19:03
  Speaker 3: could be there for my grandmother so she could let go,
• 19:07
  Speaker 3: and I could be there for my grandfather so he
• 19:09
  Speaker 3: could have support, and that I could share my dreams
• 19:13
  Speaker 3: and my experiences of her being around me still, so
• 19:17
  Speaker 3: it gave him comfort.
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: And Katie, you're right, like, I love how you stepped
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: into that, right. I mean within a very fresh period
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: of Jackson's transition, right, because a lot of people when
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: things like that happen, you're distraught, your numb you know,
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: you're just going with the flow of the day of
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: the moment, right. But it's like you were able to
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: really alchemize your energy and channel it into a wave
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: of change for your grandparents through what you experienced.
• 19:56
  Speaker 3: M absolutely, which I'm so grateful for that too, that
• 20:01
  Speaker 3: I could be there for them in a way that
• 20:03
  Speaker 3: they really needed.
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Great, man. I miss my great grandmother too. She
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: raised me as a kid. She would have been one
• 20:10
  Speaker 1: hundred and ten this year. She was still around. She
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: died in one hundred and two, but she was definitely
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: a big influence on me growing up. Katie. For our audience,
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: who's tuning in before I forget this question, I know
• 20:23
  Speaker 1: there's going to be other parents who want to connect
• 20:27
  Speaker 1: with you, right because they see where you were from
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: the transition of Jackson to who you are today, where
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: you're helping others. If somebody wants to connect with you, Katie,
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: to work with you one on one or to hear
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: your story, how can they do that?
• 20:46
  Speaker 3: I think probably the best thing is I'm online. I'm
• 20:48
  Speaker 3: all over the place, move my energy.
• 20:54
  Speaker 2: The online world in space. But this's that.
• 20:58
  Speaker 3: I think the easiest one is to find me on
• 21:01
  Speaker 3: social media through horroral wellness, and then to just reach out,
• 21:06
  Speaker 3: reach out, make that step, make that connection. It may
• 21:10
  Speaker 3: skew you, like it scared me to come on today,
• 21:12
  Speaker 3: as those sorts of things always do. And I think
• 21:15
  Speaker 3: a reminder in that is you're always going to feel
• 21:18
  Speaker 3: that fear when you're on the other side of something
• 21:22
  Speaker 3: so great, and if you look at it through the
• 21:24
  Speaker 3: lens of your on your green growing edge of transformation.
• 21:28
  Speaker 3: It helps you make that step. So just no, it
• 21:32
  Speaker 3: doesn't mean that your loved ones left behind, and it
• 21:35
  Speaker 3: means you connect with them more, connect with them deeper,
• 21:38
  Speaker 3: be able to appreciate their life and celebrate them rather
• 21:43
  Speaker 3: than living in the upset and the loss, and you know,
• 21:49
  Speaker 3: the really hard things to move through, but equally to
• 21:53
  Speaker 3: you know, keep that space to move through those emotions.
• 21:57
  Speaker 3: And my biggest thing for me was I struggle to
• 22:01
  Speaker 3: ask for support.
• 22:02
  Speaker 2: M please don't reach out.
• 22:05
  Speaker 3: I'm here if you just need me to guide you
• 22:08
  Speaker 3: somewhere I can. If you just need someone to say
• 22:11
  Speaker 3: me too, me too, so you don't feel alone.
• 22:15
  Speaker 2: I'm here.
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: You know, Katie, I appreciate you reinforcing that, taking that
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: step to ask for support, because I feel like so
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: many of us who've experienced loss, who are you know,
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: expanding our businesses whatever might And a lot of parents
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: struggle with asking for help.
• 22:37
  Speaker 2: That was really hard for me.
• 22:39
  Speaker 3: That was hard for me through his cancer journey. It
• 22:43
  Speaker 3: was hard for me afterwards. And you know, I was
• 22:46
  Speaker 3: supporting two young children through their grief that they didn't
• 22:49
  Speaker 3: know what was happening in their bodies and their minds
• 22:53
  Speaker 3: and spiritually. And then you know my husband as well,
• 22:57
  Speaker 3: he had his own because everyone's grief shows up so
• 22:59
  Speaker 3: different and I didn't know how to ask for support.
• 23:04
  Speaker 2: I really, oh, I didn't.
• 23:08
  Speaker 3: Until really Jackson, which he continually does, Mum, you need
• 23:13
  Speaker 3: to find someone. And I started finding people in the
• 23:15
  Speaker 3: health realm, even just having a massage and touch going
• 23:21
  Speaker 3: and seeing someone who could work with my nervous system
• 23:23
  Speaker 3: a bit mortivate, bring that calm. So it allowed me
• 23:26
  Speaker 3: to enter those spaces to be like, hey, actually I
• 23:29
  Speaker 3: need to And the big part for me that learning
• 23:32
  Speaker 3: to ask for support. When my son were down syndrome,
• 23:36
  Speaker 3: had to have open heart surgery when you were seven
• 23:38
  Speaker 3: months old, I was able to And if someone was
• 23:42
  Speaker 3: like can I do anything?
• 23:44
  Speaker 2: You sure can? I'm sure can do something.
• 23:48
  Speaker 3: I'm hungry, Please bring me food or please could you
• 23:53
  Speaker 3: go and just clean the house or get the washing
• 23:55
  Speaker 3: on or take the.
• 23:56
  Speaker 2: Dog for a walk.
• 23:58
  Speaker 3: I was able to ask because I knew I needed it,
• 24:02
  Speaker 3: because I needed to be there for my son and
• 24:04
  Speaker 3: I needed to be there for my emotions and for me.
• 24:07
  Speaker 3: I need someone else to do the day to day
• 24:10
  Speaker 3: because that wasn't important.
• 24:12
  Speaker 1: And see what a beautiful birth of assertiveness for you,
• 24:17
  Speaker 1: because I think so many people you know, that's the
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: one thing that I always talk about, Katie, is they're
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: hitting gifts within our grief journey, because grief can really
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: ignite some places within you or spark some ideas within
• 24:34
  Speaker 1: you that you have been sitting you know, been sitting
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: on dormant for a while.
• 24:39
  Speaker 3: Absolutely, and I think you know my big one like
• 24:42
  Speaker 3: is like I mentioned before about finding me, is letting
• 24:45
  Speaker 3: me shine like life so short, we don't know, so.
• 24:51
  Speaker 2: Shine find that way to do it?
• 24:54
  Speaker 3: What brings yes, you know, like that is and has
• 24:59
  Speaker 3: that person that transitioned and that is no longer physically
• 25:03
  Speaker 3: with you be a guiding light show them look at me,
• 25:07
  Speaker 3: look at me now, Like my son would be jumping
• 25:11
  Speaker 3: and screaming with joy, because like mom, you love your life,
• 25:16
  Speaker 3: You love what you you love being able to serve
• 25:20
  Speaker 3: people and help them move through and you know, witness
• 25:24
  Speaker 3: their pain so they can come out the other side
• 25:28
  Speaker 3: and love their life too.
• 25:30
  Speaker 1: What Katie, that just hearing that part right? And I
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: tell this to a lot of people that I know.
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: My mom Shaye would be crying and devastated knowing that
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: I'm stuck in life because she's gone. She wants me
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: to still be happy and enjoy life and find me
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: and you know, and yeah, I'm gonna have moments right
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: where I really miss her. But at the same time,
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: I know she doesn't want me to stay stuck because
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: she's no longer physically here, you know. And I'm glad, Katie,
• 26:06
  Speaker 1: you see it from the same lens that you know
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: Jackson is, you know, jumping for joy for you because
• 26:11
  Speaker 1: he helped you find you. Right And Katie, we're going
• 26:16
  Speaker 1: to be wrapping up here soon. But for our audience
• 26:18
  Speaker 1: who's tuning in, what are you working on that they
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: can expect out next? Do you have any upcoming events
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: or things that they may want to attend soon?
• 26:30
  Speaker 3: M h.
• 26:31
  Speaker 4: Lots of things are actually unfolding.
• 26:32
  Speaker 3: It's been one of those years of you know, the
• 26:35
  Speaker 3: more you step into the truth, the more it comes,
• 26:38
  Speaker 3: which is so wonderful. Locally, I'm working with Cleena Movement
• 26:44
  Speaker 3: and an incredible woman, Karen to assist her with her
• 26:49
  Speaker 3: sound bowl healing, so utilizing energetics and reiki to support
• 26:54
  Speaker 3: and help people move through that. So we do have
• 26:56
  Speaker 3: one this Sunday. It's basically every New moon full moon.
• 26:59
  Speaker 3: So those those have been incredible containers of being able
• 27:03
  Speaker 3: to energetically be supported, to be able to move.
• 27:09
  Speaker 2: Through what's happening. So those are wonderful.
• 27:12
  Speaker 3: I am working on my book, so I'm hoping next
• 27:16
  Speaker 3: year that I get that out, and so that's basically
• 27:20
  Speaker 3: about my journey as a mother through my son's diagnosis
• 27:24
  Speaker 3: and then him transitioning.
• 27:26
  Speaker 2: As one of my first books.
• 27:27
  Speaker 3: I have a couple that are in the universe right
• 27:31
  Speaker 3: now waiting to come forward, but that's the one that
• 27:35
  Speaker 3: I really want to bring out there, and within that
• 27:38
  Speaker 3: beautiful container, it will also share, like me looking back,
• 27:42
  Speaker 3: what I know now to be able to help move
• 27:45
  Speaker 3: through that.
• 27:46
  Speaker 2: So it's not just about that journeys.
• 27:49
  Speaker 3: There's lessons to be able to learn so people can
• 27:52
  Speaker 3: be supported within that, especially with losing a child. And
• 27:56
  Speaker 3: then I also am working on a beautiful new program.
• 28:02
  Speaker 3: So I call it a program, that's maybe not the word.
• 28:04
  Speaker 3: I think it's more of a transformation. So being able
• 28:08
  Speaker 3: to move out a survival mode. So whether that is
• 28:11
  Speaker 3: you're struggling with grief or illness or something that's really
• 28:15
  Speaker 3: holding you back, maybe it's also of identity from becoming
• 28:18
  Speaker 3: a mother or losing someone to an embodied and vibrant
• 28:23
  Speaker 3: health and well being. So this is a really beautiful
• 28:26
  Speaker 3: container where it's one on one mentorship to really help
• 28:29
  Speaker 3: you move through that so you get to live the
• 28:31
  Speaker 3: life that you love.
• 28:33
  Speaker 1: Katie, please let us know when that book comes out,
• 28:36
  Speaker 1: and we'll definitely have you back on the show to
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: talk about it and do a full Q and A
• 28:41
  Speaker 1: with you once the book has arrived.
• 28:43
  Speaker 2: I would love that.
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: Thank you well, everybody that was Katie Gilbertson that you
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: heard from Anger with Portia. And that concludes another episode
• 28:53
  Speaker 1: and until next time, everybody, peace and haw Grief
• 29:07
  Speaker 3: Wents