Latest / Welcome to The Vineyard Podcast with Montoya Williams / “Don’t You Wish Someone Taught You That Your Happiness Matters Too?” | Christian Relationship Advice, Self-Abandonment & Emotional Healing Through Christ | Season 5 Ep 7

Transcript

“Don’t You Wish Someone Taught You That Your Happiness Matters Too?” | Christian Relationship Advice, Self-Abandonment & Emotional Healing Through Christ | Season 5 Ep 7 · Welcome to The Vineyard Podcast with Montoya Williams

• 0:00
  Welcome to the Vineyard Podcast, where her identity in Christ becomes the foundation for a healthy Christ-centered relationship.
• 0:10
  Hi, love.
• 0:12
  If this is your first time here, we welcome you, and we always begin by first inviting God into the conversation.
• 0:22
  So Lord, thank you.
• 0:24
  Thank you for every heart that you have led here today.
• 0:28
  Lord, I ask that you will anoint my voice to speak what needs to be spoken, and I pray that you will bless our ears to hear what needs to be heard.
• 0:42
  It is in Jesus' name I ask and pray.
• 0:46
  Amen.
• 0:48
  Yay, God.
• 0:51
  Hi, love In the last episode, we shared how emotional confusion in relationships result sometimes in mixed signals, emotional inconsistency, and showing up unavailable in relationships emotionally And eventually it costs you your peace because your peace begins dependent on whether someone else emotionally shows up for you in the relationship And love, that kind of emotional confusion becomes exhausting over time.
• 1:46
  If you haven't already, check out those episodes prior to this one in season five.
• 1:52
  Start with episode one where we go deep into the identity But today I wanna talk about what happens when women slowly abandon themselves emotionally trying to keep love alive.
• 2:18
  Because some women become so focused on everyone else's happiness that they slowly stop checking in on their own.
• 2:29
  They start making sure everyone else feels love, everyone else feels comfortable, making sure everyone else is emotionally okay.
• 2:41
  Meanwhile, their own spirits are quietly running on empty And honestly, love, many women don't even realize how emotionally disconnected they've become from themselves because they're in survival mode.
• 3:01
  And survival mode has simply become normal And so what that looks like is now they don't even ask themselves what makes them happy anymore.
• 3:20
  They don't ask what brings me peace They don't even ask themselves,"What do I need emotionally anymore?" Because their entire emotional focus Became keeping relationships Keeping the peace, keeping everyone else emotionally satisfied and safe And love, healthy Christ-centered love should never require you to emotionally disappear in order for someone else to feel whole.
• 4:09
  True love desires happiness for you, too.
• 4:14
  True love desires peace for you, too.
• 4:21
  True love desires for you to feel emotionally safe, too And this is why internal care matters.
• 4:36
  Not just external self-care, not just getting your hair done.
• 4:44
  The hair appointments are nice, but it's not just about the hair appointments, not just about the vacation and the shopping.
• 4:56
  It's not just about looking okay externally But internally How is your spirit doing?
• 5:12
  How is your emotional health doing?
• 5:17
  How's your mind doing?
• 5:21
  How is your relationship with you doing?
• 5:30
  And I ask because some women look completely fine publicly.
• 5:37
  We have our way of really looking well externally while privately feeling emotionally depleted internally We put on a smile, we function, we serve.
• 5:59
  We help everyone else, but emotionally we're exhausted And sometimes the most healing thing a woman can do is slow down.
• 6:17
  Slow down long enough to reconnect with herself again Reconnect to hear herself again.
• 6:31
  Reconnect to spend quiet time with God again.
• 6:39
  Reconnect to learn herself all over again outside of the survivor mode The Bible tells us to love our neighbors as we love ourselves So that means God never intended for us to completely neglect ourselves while loving someone else.
• 7:18
  In fact, we can only love others to the capacity that we can love and nurture ourselves.
• 7:29
  And maybe today, love, God is not trying to shame you.
• 7:35
  Maybe he's just gently inviting you back to yourself, back to your peace, back to your internal healing, back to your emotional care, back to your wholeness So with that being said Let's say a prayer today let's pray together.
• 8:08
  Lord, thank you for every woman listening right now Thank you for sustaining her even in the season where she's slowly pouring so much of herself into everyone else that she forgets to care for herself internally Lord, thank you for protecting her even through the relationships, through the disappointments, God, through the emotional confusion, through the exhausting season That has been tiring her out, Lord, has been draining her spirit Lord, please help her reconnect with herself again through you.
• 9:07
  Lord, please restore her peace, restore her joy, restore her emotional balance.
• 9:18
  Lord, please restore the parts of her that quietly became neglected while she was trying to keep everyone else emotionally whole, God.
• 9:31
  Lord, please teach her that healthy love should never require self-abandonment.
• 9:38
  Lord, help her to see How to love others without having to lose herself in the process.
• 9:52
  And Lord, please remind her today that her happiness matters too.
• 10:00
  And I ask these prayers in your name, Jesus Christ.
• 10:05
  Amen.
• 10:08
  Love, if this episode spoke directly to your heart, stay close because hope is unfolding inside the vineyard.
• 10:20
  And I truly believe that these conversations are only the beginning of what God is preparing for the woman by the name of Love.
• 10:30
  So make sure you're following the podcast because I want you to be among the first to know what's unfolding next inside the vineyard.
• 10:43
  So until next time, stay anchored in Christ and covered in love, and we'll chat again soon.