Latest / Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families / We're In Our Handstand Era

Transcript

We're In Our Handstand Era · Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

0:05
Speaker 1: Today, Welcome to the Happy Families Podcast. Friday means I'll
0:09
Speaker 1: do Better Tomorrow. This is where we reflect on the
0:10
Speaker 1: week that was. We talk about the highs and the lows,
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Speaker 1: the wins and the things that we didn't get quite
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Speaker 1: right and hopefully inspire your family to be happier today.
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Speaker 1: A big win, A big win where I got to
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Speaker 1: be Dad of the day came at a cost which
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Speaker 1: was a bit of a challenge for me, but I'm
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Speaker 1: going to talk about that. Plus missus Happy Families has
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Speaker 1: created a new tradition in our home and it's also
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Speaker 1: a win. Find out more about what we've done and
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Speaker 1: how it can make your family happier. Next stay with us.
0:45
Speaker 1: Hello and welcome to the Happy Families podcast, where you
0:47
Speaker 1: get real parenting solutions every single day. This is Australia's
0:50
Speaker 1: most downloaded parenting podcast where Justin and Kylie Colson and
0:53
Speaker 1: the weekend's just around the corner, which means we get
0:55
Speaker 1: to review the week. It's an old Do Better Tomorrow
0:58
Speaker 1: episode of the pod. Kylie, we both had pretty cool
1:01
Speaker 1: stuff happen just recently and it's worth unpacking. I'm going
1:06
Speaker 1: to go first today. You know how I phil about
1:08
Speaker 1: school assemblies. Yes, I have been vocal on the podcast
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Speaker 1: and in other arenas for most of my life about
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Speaker 1: how much I hate going to school assemblies. And yet
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Speaker 1: oh and just recently, our year eleven daughter Lily, she
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Speaker 1: had something going on at a school assembly. She goes
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Speaker 1: to a school that is quite different. It's called the
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Speaker 1: Industry School, and go to talk more about that in
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Speaker 1: a sec hashtag not sponsored by the way. And she
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Speaker 1: was celebrating an achievement, which meant that I had to
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Speaker 1: give up a whole lot of really important things so
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Speaker 1: that I could go and sit in an assembly and
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Speaker 1: do the thing that I swore I was never going
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Speaker 1: to do again, because you had even more things on
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Speaker 1: and they were more important, And so I was the
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Speaker 1: one who had to I drew the short stick, the
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Speaker 1: short straw, I got the rough end of the pineapple.
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Speaker 2: You know, you're digging in a pretty good hole here.
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Speaker 1: Well, anyway, so I've shown up to this thing. They
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Speaker 1: call it a roof shout. They've stolen the idea from
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Speaker 1: the New Zealanders, who when they build a house there's
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Speaker 1: a big celebration when the roof goes on, because it's like, hey,
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Speaker 1: we've done it. We've done this really hard thing and
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Speaker 1: it's complete. Well, backtrack just a little bit. The story
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Speaker 1: here is pretty important. We took Lily out of school
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Speaker 1: in grade eight and homeschooled her for about was it
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Speaker 1: about eighteen month months till grade ten? Yeah? And the
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Speaker 1: reason for that complex and varied, but mainly it came
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Speaker 1: down to just bullying and some horrible stuff at school
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Speaker 1: that wasn't being remedied and we just thought, no, we
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Speaker 1: don't need to stand for this. She doesn't need to either.
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Speaker 1: We can change it. So we homeschooled for eighteen months.
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Speaker 1: But in grade ten she came to us and said,
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Speaker 1: I really want to go back to school. We talked
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Speaker 1: about all the different schooling options that were available. There's
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Speaker 1: a fabulous state school just down the road. I've done
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Speaker 1: some work for them, and they were very enthusiastic about
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Speaker 1: having our kids. There a couple of private schools that
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Speaker 1: were options as well, and nothing felt quite right for
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Speaker 1: her until we discovered this school that's called the Industry School.
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Speaker 1: I've already said this, but I'll say it again. Not
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Speaker 1: sponsored fallen in love with what this schools about basically
3:02
Speaker 1: for kids who don't like being at school. But for
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Speaker 1: parents who really believe that their kids do need to
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Speaker 1: finish school. The industry school says, let's see if we
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Speaker 1: can get your kids into grade ten, grade eleven, and
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Speaker 1: grade twelve, get them through a school, but give them
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Speaker 1: industry experience. We'll give them just the basic reading, writing,
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Speaker 1: and arithmetic stuff that they need to do to get
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Speaker 1: through year twelve. That's important, but they do five weeks
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Speaker 1: of industry placement and work experience, followed by five weeks
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Speaker 1: at school, and then at school holidays, and then back
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Speaker 1: again five weeks of placement, five weeks of school, and
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Speaker 1: so throughout grade ten. Lily wanted she just loves horses,
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Speaker 1: and we live on a suburban block and we can't
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Speaker 1: afford horses. I don't want to live on an acreage.
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Speaker 1: I don't want to work the upkeep, and I don't
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Speaker 1: want the drama. Sorry the quote unquote the lifestyle of
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Speaker 1: having horses.
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Speaker 2: I might be showing an ad for a horse for
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Speaker 2: sale every.
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Speaker 1: Now, this horse is so good, we could buy this horse.
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Speaker 1: I'm like, then I've got to pay for reducement to
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Speaker 1: stick a horse in a paddock. You're still going to
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Speaker 1: pay for the foe. You've got to pay rent on
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Speaker 1: the paddock basics. I'm like no, and it's almost as
4:04
Speaker 1: much as a renting a house anyway. So we've always
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Speaker 1: said no to the horse, but we've done what we
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Speaker 1: can to facilitate her love for it anyway. Industry school
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Speaker 1: has this thing called they called the Equine Academy, which
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Speaker 1: basically sticks kids into an environment where they get to
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Speaker 1: spend time at stables and at race tracks. They can
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Speaker 1: just spend time with the cream of the crop, the
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Speaker 1: best horses at the best stables and the stud farms
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Speaker 1: and all that sort of stuff. And she's had the
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Speaker 1: most amazing eighteen months since she's been in school in
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Speaker 1: year ten, halfway through year eleven or just about and
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Speaker 1: loving it. And she's done such a great job at
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Speaker 1: work experience that her I was going to say employer
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Speaker 1: is that she's done a lot of different employers, but
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Speaker 1: one of the people that she's worked with has said,
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Speaker 1: I want to put you on as a school based apprentice.
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Speaker 1: And so now she goes to school two days, two days,
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Speaker 1: three days, three days, and she goes to work two
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Speaker 1: days and gets paid and gets paid which is great
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Speaker 1: because we charge so now she's paying her own way.
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Speaker 1: We feel a little bit good about that. But here's
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Speaker 1: the main reason that I'm sharing this. They have this
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Speaker 1: tradition at this roof shout where when you get your
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Speaker 1: school based apprenticeship.
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Speaker 2: Which generally does not happen until year twelve.
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Speaker 1: Yeah, there's a couple of year elevens that got to
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Speaker 1: do it, but it's mainly a year twelve thing. When
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Speaker 1: you get that school based apprenticeship, they call you down
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Speaker 1: in front of the entire school. You stand up, They
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Speaker 1: talk about, hey, you've gone, why you've got the apprenticeship,
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Speaker 1: what the employers have said about you, and then you
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Speaker 1: pick up the bell and you ring that thing with
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Speaker 1: everything you've got. And you know what, I'm getting a
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Speaker 1: little bit weepy just thinking about it. It was so
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Speaker 1: awesome to watch this sixteen year old girl walk down
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Speaker 1: the stairs when her name was called out, stand up.
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Speaker 1: And the thing that has to happen is that the
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Speaker 1: students and parents who are there, everyone gets a standing ovation.
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Speaker 1: And it felt awesome to watch our daughter get a
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Speaker 1: standing ovation because she did something that she was passionate about.
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Speaker 1: She's worked really hard, she's got great work ethic, she's
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Speaker 1: stuck at it, and now she's got this job, doing
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Speaker 1: something that she's really excited about. And everyone got to
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Speaker 1: stand up and applaud and whistle and cheer, and they
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Speaker 1: really do it. Like the students, you can tell that
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Speaker 1: they get it. They're like, we're figuring this out, we're
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Speaker 1: making decisions about the rest of our lives. And this
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Speaker 1: is a student one of us has just gone out
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Speaker 1: and taken a really big step forward into the grown
6:22
Speaker 1: up world. And yeah, I'm pretty emotional about it because
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Speaker 1: I hate school assemblies, and yet this thing going. Look
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Speaker 1: at my little girl, a fifth sixteen year old that
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Speaker 1: we've raised now, and she's making her way. She's doing it,
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Speaker 1: she's making this progress. So my older better tomorrow is
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Speaker 1: sometimes because these moments matter. She told me that because
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Speaker 1: I had these other important things on that I was
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Speaker 1: supposed to be doing, she said, Dad, you don't have
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Speaker 1: to come along. Like I'm just going to walk down
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Speaker 1: the front ring a bell and then I'm going to
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Speaker 1: go and sit in my seat again. And she's right.
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Speaker 1: I didn't have to be there, but the sacrifice was
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Speaker 1: worth it, and it was a real treat. It was
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Speaker 1: a real treat to see that success that she's had.
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Speaker 2: A few weeks ago when she actually signed the paperwork
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Speaker 2: for her apprenticeship. I got to meet with her employer,
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Speaker 2: but also the representative from the apprentice office, and he
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Speaker 2: couldn't wait to meet me, and he said, have you
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Speaker 2: met Dave. Dave is one of the guys who works
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Speaker 2: in another stable next door, and when he came to
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Speaker 2: sign Lily up, he'd actually gone to the wrong stable,
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Speaker 2: and so he bumped into Dave, and Dave was curious
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Speaker 2: and asked him what he was doing, and he said, oh,
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Speaker 2: I've come to sign Lily up for an apprentice ship.
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Speaker 2: And he just said, if you haven't talked to Dave,
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Speaker 2: you need to talk to Dave. And he just proceeded
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Speaker 2: to tell me the glowing report that he'd received from Dave,
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Speaker 2: who doesn't even work with Lily but has experienced just
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Speaker 2: the beautiful kid that she is. And he just said,
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Speaker 2: she's good with people, she's good with the animals, she's
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Speaker 2: she does what she's asked. You know, it's got.
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Speaker 1: Great work ethics, just smashing it.
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Speaker 2: Uses her initiative. And I kind of looked at him
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Speaker 2: and said, oh, I hope she brings that home.
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Speaker 1: Yeah, point point.
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Speaker 2: But what's so amazing is that number one when we
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Speaker 2: help our children tap into the things that they love.
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Speaker 2: That's when we see them shine.
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Speaker 1: Right, So he's doings and cleaning her room. She does
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Speaker 1: not love. Therefore she is not shining, Yeah, but playing,
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Speaker 1: playing looking after these horses, mucking out stables. It is
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Speaker 1: like playing for her, and therefore she shines all right.
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Speaker 1: After the break, the new tradition, the new ritual, the
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Speaker 1: new thing that you've created in our home that seems
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Speaker 1: to be changing the game for our weekends. And I
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Speaker 1: can't wait for Sunday so we can do it again.
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Speaker 1: We'll find out more about that next we're back. This
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Speaker 1: is the Happy Famili's podcast. Missus Happy Families, Let's kick on.
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Speaker 2: You're so funny. I don't know how you've given me
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Speaker 2: all the credit for this, because this actually started because
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Speaker 2: you had to show off.
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Speaker 1: Oh.
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Speaker 2: So, we've been working at the gym for the last
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Speaker 2: three months and our big goal is to do a handstand.
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Speaker 2: And it seems like such a minuscule skill, but try it.
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Speaker 2: If you haven't done a handstand for a while, just
9:33
Speaker 2: try try it.
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Speaker 1: Tell me damn hard.
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Speaker 2: Tell me what you think. And so when you first
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Speaker 2: got to the point where you could actually do one,
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Speaker 2: you were so excited just to show in life.
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Speaker 1: I still can't do a handstand, but there's a way
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Speaker 1: that we like. You're using the wall as do a
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Speaker 1: handstand against the wall. You put your feet against the
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Speaker 1: wall and you sort of walk up the wall and
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Speaker 1: bring your chest into the wall, and then when you
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Speaker 1: get better at it, then you flip yourself up that
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Speaker 1: your back is to the wall, and then eventually you
10:02
Speaker 1: get to the point where you don't need a wall
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Speaker 1: at all. We still use the wall. So I just
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Speaker 1: want to be really clear about this. You making me
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Speaker 1: sound way better than I am. I have no idea
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Speaker 1: what I'm doing, really, but we are getting better at
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Speaker 1: using the wall to do handstands.
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Speaker 2: Most Sundays we have our son in law, Jared join
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Speaker 2: us for dinner, and he has been going ridiculously well
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Speaker 2: at the gym as well. Yeah, but a totally different
10:27
Speaker 2: skill set to what you and I are doing.
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Speaker 1: He's just pumping heavy weights, yeah, and so looking great
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Speaker 1: for it.
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Speaker 2: He's been building some pretty big shoulders and so when
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Speaker 2: you started showing him what you could do, he was like, well,
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Speaker 2: I'm going to give this a go, and he couldn't
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Speaker 2: do any of it.
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Speaker 1: The gym bro can't do what the fifty year old
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Speaker 1: father in law can do. That's more so the calory, which.
10:48
Speaker 2: Spurred you on even more. And so over the last
10:51
Speaker 2: handful of weeks, as you've been getting stronger and Jared
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Speaker 2: has been ridiculously competitive, we then add our almost son
11:00
Speaker 2: in law to the mix, and Elijah joins us, and
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Speaker 2: he's very strong as well.
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Speaker 1: He's a builder, like he's lugging heavy things all day
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Speaker 1: every day. He's strong.
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Speaker 2: And so now we've got the three boys out on
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Speaker 2: the grass outside doing freestand handstands and going just having
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Speaker 2: a blast. Well that then spurred on our our disdaughter,
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Speaker 2: Jared's wife Chanelle, and she decided while she was down
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Speaker 2: at the beach one day that she was going to
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Speaker 2: give her hands down to go. And then she shows
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Speaker 2: up and she's like, look what I can do. So
11:34
Speaker 2: she's now doing it. And Annie's been coming to the
11:36
Speaker 2: gym with us, as has Emily, and they are getting it.
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Speaker 2: And so now Sunday night we've got this Sunday night
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Speaker 2: tradition of their family dinners has turned into a handstand party.
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Speaker 2: And the most exciting thing was that the other day
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Speaker 2: I came home because you weren't able to join me
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Speaker 2: at the gym, and for the very first time I
11:58
Speaker 2: was able to do a wall assistant handstand without any assistance.
12:02
Speaker 1: Yeah, yep, and that was pretty cool. So now you
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Speaker 1: get to show off, I get to show off.
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Speaker 2: So what I love about this is there's nothing to it.
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Speaker 2: It wasn't planned. There's no reason why this should be
12:18
Speaker 2: so exciting and so much fun, and yet it is
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Speaker 2: the thing. I think that everyone now looks forward to
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Speaker 2: more than the dinner.
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Speaker 1: Let's get together and share our progress and push each
12:29
Speaker 1: other a little bit further and do this sort of stuff.
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Speaker 2: And it's just so much fun. It's fun to see
12:34
Speaker 2: everybody using their bodies and challenging themselves and cheering on
12:40
Speaker 2: everyone because we're all at totally different stages.
12:44
Speaker 1: So a quick disclaimer, if you're listening to this and thinking,
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Speaker 1: I know what we're going to do on Sunday night,
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Speaker 1: we will not be held responsible for any broken wrists
12:52
Speaker 1: or elbows or forearms, or any kicks to the face
12:56
Speaker 1: or anything like that. It's totally on you if you
12:58
Speaker 1: decided to do this, and it could does easily have
13:00
Speaker 1: been swimming in the pool or throwing a frisbee. Or
13:02
Speaker 1: kicking a ball or playing handball or hopscotch or like.
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Speaker 1: The point is it's getting together and it's doing an
13:10
Speaker 1: activity that everybody's excited about and really enjoying.
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Speaker 2: Right Yeah, And I have made an executive decision that
13:18
Speaker 2: for my fiftieth birthday, the only way you get in
13:22
Speaker 2: is if you do a handstand.
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Speaker 1: It's so funny that you bring that up, because I
13:26
Speaker 1: had this thought, and it was like this ritual, this
13:30
Speaker 1: tradition that we've created quite accidentally, quite organically. I was thinking,
13:35
Speaker 1: if I keep this up one day, probably when I'm
13:39
Speaker 1: about I don't know, seventy or so, which we're talking
13:42
Speaker 1: twenty years down the track, right, I reckon, there's a
13:44
Speaker 1: pretty good chance that we're going to have teenage grandkids
13:47
Speaker 1: by then. We've already got a soon to be three
13:48
Speaker 1: year old grandchild and second daughter getting married. So let's
13:52
Speaker 1: fast forward twenty years. It's highly probable that we'll have
13:55
Speaker 1: several grandkids in their teams. And I can't wait to
13:59
Speaker 1: say to our grandsons and granddaughters, Hey, you reckon, you
14:04
Speaker 1: you can do a longer handstand than Pops. You reckon,
14:06
Speaker 1: you can do a longer plank. You can can do
14:07
Speaker 1: more push ups than me. I just think how much
14:09
Speaker 1: fun would it be to be playing around with all
14:11
Speaker 1: that sort of stuff with the grandkids and to be
14:13
Speaker 1: able to outlast everyone of them. I'm just so pumped
14:17
Speaker 1: for this. I want to be seventy now. Like how exciting.
14:21
Speaker 1: I love it. Two wins. It's been a good week.
14:23
Speaker 1: We hope these stories inspire you to spend more time
14:26
Speaker 1: doing this stuff that matters with your family. Thank you
14:29
Speaker 1: so much for joining us and spending your time with
14:31
Speaker 1: us on the Happy Families podcast, which is produced by
14:33
Speaker 1: Justin Roland from Bridge Media. Mimhammonds provides our additional support
14:37
Speaker 1: and for more info about making your family happier, and
14:39
Speaker 1: especially if you'd like to get hold of the brand
14:43
Speaker 1: new book that I've written called Boys, Building Strong young
14:45
Speaker 1: Men from the inside Out. Jump onto Happy Families dot
14:49
Speaker 1: com dot au pre order now. You get twenty seven
14:52
Speaker 1: percent off if you go to book Topia, and there's
14:54
Speaker 1: a whole lot of other bonuses that we're now launching
14:57
Speaker 1: to help you to get the help you need raising
15:00
Speaker 1: your kids. Happy Families dot com dot au.
15:04
Speaker 2: Mm hmm,