Latest / Good Morning From The Chicken Coop! / Season 4 - Episode 256 -Just say no!
Transcript
- 0:01Hey. Everybody, welcome to the Good
- 0:03Morning from the Chicken Coop podcast.
- 0:05My name is Kim Johnson and I am a mastermindset, coach, creative
- 0:08strategist, and also happened to be a farmer.
- 0:11This is my Chicken coop and I come out here.
- 0:13Every day to record a podcast to.
- 0:15Teach distinctions, possibilities, new ways.
- 0:18Of thinking. And just bring some joy into the
- 0:21world. So welcome to the coop and let's
- 0:23start your day off in a fantastic way.
- 0:27Hey, everybody. Good morning.
- 0:30How many times do you say no to people?
- 0:34This is a very tricky question because saying no is hard for
- 0:38most of us. We think we have to say yes to
- 0:41everything if we want to make progress and I'm going to say no
- 0:46because today's theme is no. I'm laughing, but it's one of
- 0:50the things I had to learn for myself because I often go
- 0:55through my life and I would say yes.
- 0:56And I would be like, sure, yes. And I've heard the theory before
- 0:59of, you know, that person who did and said yes to everything
- 1:02and how that changed their life. And OK, that that can happen.
- 1:06It can happen. And I learned through the
- 1:09process of saying yes often that there are things that I know I
- 1:15don't want to do and I'm saying yes to them.
- 1:17And boy, did it make me feel crappy.
- 1:20And I felt like I was taken advantage of.
- 1:22And it's just, it just was not fun.
- 1:27Hence entering into the word no. And years of my life, I had to,
- 1:32you know, practice. I want to use I'm air quoting.
- 1:36I had to practice using the word no because it was so easy to say
- 1:41yes and then regret it. Like how many times have you
- 1:45said to somebody they invite you to go to have lunch and you
- 1:48don't want to go have lunch because it disrupts your entire
- 1:51day. You're just like, I don't want
- 1:52to do that. And you're like, sure, I'd love
- 1:55to go. And those words come out of your
- 1:57mouth and you're like, that is so not true.
- 1:59Not one of those words is true. Right from the word sure till
- 2:02I'd love to no, think about it. Do you really love to do this?
- 2:07And the truth is it isn't true. It's no, it's a hard no.
- 2:12You don't love to do that. You don't want to go do
- 2:14something like that. Yet you witnessed those words
- 2:17fly out of your mouth. And somebody will say to me, oh,
- 2:21well, it's a people pleasing thing.
- 2:23And I'm like, you know what? I think it's one of those things
- 2:26where we all have our different definitions of it.
- 2:28But for me, I know it was a I don't want to disappoint myself
- 2:34by knowing afterwards I missed out on something.
- 2:37The truth is it wasn't about pleasing other people as much as
- 2:40it was about I, I didn't want to miss out on something.
- 2:43What if I didn't go? What if I was supposed to be
- 2:46there? What if this was like, you know,
- 2:48the time I met the right person that took my career or gave me
- 2:51an opportunity or I, I, I missed even having great food.
- 2:55I would have that fear of missing out on something and it
- 2:59would stop me cold in my tracks. So I would hear myself say, Oh
- 3:04yes, I'd love to go. And then afterwards I'd be like,
- 3:07why did I say that? And then when I went, oh boy,
- 3:11social proof right in my face of Nope, that was not going to work
- 3:15out the way I thought it was going to work out because guess
- 3:17what? I got there and nothing great
- 3:18happened. I mean, if I'm completely honest
- 3:21about it, there have been times when I have been invited to go
- 3:23out and speak. I haven't wanted to go.
- 3:26I said yes because it was a business decision.
- 3:29And inside my gut, I knew that if I went, it was not going to
- 3:33yield anything, but I would go anyway.
- 3:36And you know what the truth was? It didn't.
- 3:38Now, one could say if you're, you know, a frequent listener of
- 3:42this, you know, podcast, you know, we talk about manifesting
- 3:47all the time. So did I manifest those results
- 3:50of nothing happening? Maybe.
- 3:52I don't know. All I know is, guess what?
- 3:55I had the thought, I don't know what it's going to yield.
- 3:58I don't know. I don't have a good feeling
- 3:59about going. So did I manifest it or did it
- 4:02just show up that way? And that's sometimes that's the
- 4:05conundrum. Sometimes you don't know.
- 4:07But what I've learned overtime is that saying no is powerful.
- 4:11Putting yourself in the position of saying no.
- 4:13I'm not putting up with this anymore.
- 4:15I'm not doing this anymore. I'm not tolerating this for
- 4:18myself. No, no, no, no, no.
- 4:20So it it is a very, very important choice to use that
- 4:27word wisely and recognize that you know what, especially as we
- 4:32come into the holiday season, if you don't want to do something,
- 4:35say no. If you don't want to drink that
- 4:38drink, say no. If you don't want to go to the
- 4:41party, say no. Say I'm unavailable.
- 4:44Say anything that leads to the words no, but do it because it
- 4:48will. It will show you that you have
- 4:51power. If you get bombarded by 1000
- 4:54emails in a day and everybody's looking for your attention, yes,
- 4:58of course they're anticipating you to answer those emails.
- 5:02But because it's an e-mail, it's like getting a piece of mail,
- 5:06old school. You know you get it, but you
- 5:09don't know what day you're going to get it.
- 5:10And sometimes I will tell my clients, if you're going to
- 5:13e-mail me something, text me so I know to go look because that
- 5:16is not my fastest mode. If I get emails, I'm not
- 5:20checking them constantly. So put some boundaries up, Say
- 5:24the words no Save yourself and recognize that sometimes just
- 5:29because something comes your way doesn't mean you have to say yes
- 5:33to it, and it doesn't mean it's going to yield anything
- 5:36wonderful for you. OK my friends, I hope you have a
- 5:39blessed day and I will see you tomorrow.
- 5:40Bye.