Latest / Black Girl Interrupted Podcast / Workplace Bullying....Remembering Dr. Bonnie Bailey

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Workplace Bullying....Remembering Dr. Bonnie Bailey · Black Girl Interrupted Podcast

0:11
Black Girl Interrupted. Y'all already know how it's gonna be rookie. Y'all already
0:27
know how that girl interrupted. Oh my god, my god, y'all,
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what's up? What's up? What's up? Man? Man, man man
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man, y'all, welcome back. Black Girl Interrupted podcast is back tonight.
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First off, let me say I missed y'all. I really truly missed y'all,
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Like I really, really, really truly did. I'm so so happy
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to see y'all. As y'all know, I had to be rushing back into
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emergency surgery the day after Thanksgiving again, another complication with my hysterectomy. But
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I go and I see an specialist on Friday, so hopefully it all goes
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well. Hopefully I do not have to have another surgery. So y'all keep
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your girl in prayer. That's all I'm hoping for. But tonight's conversation is
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a very needed conversation. As you know, you guys know that I had
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to take some time off from work for my mental hmm. Let me let
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me first say this. As much as we love our jobs, I really
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need you guys to really love your mental even more. A lot of y'all
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don't understand why go it's hard for mental health the way that I do as
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a person that suffers from depression and anxiety. I can't stress enough how imperative
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it is that I need you to take care of your mental first. These
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jobs, these companies don't give a damn about you. Something happens to you,
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They're gonna have somebody sitting in your chair the same day, hell if
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not the next day. So this is why I stress so much about mental
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health. This is why I tell people, utilize your PTO, utilize the
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resources that are available to you when it comes to your mental health. Do
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not sit and suffer in silence. That's one of the things that we do.
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Because therapy is so taboo. People tend to say old therapists don't know
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what they're doing. Therapists they don't help. I'm here to tell you,
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yes, they do. If it wasn't for my therapist, I wouldn't be
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sitting here todate. So tonight's conversation is very personal to me, and y'all
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already know before I do anything, before I get started in any situation,
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y'all already know I always always do my mental health check in. I always
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play something motivational. I always play something inspirational, something to let you guys
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know that you're not alone. Y'all bet with me, because I'm coming back
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into my in the safest space that I could have ever created for myself.
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So I'm back, but you already know. I always have to play something
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motivational, inspirational to let you know you're not alone. So here we go,
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before we jump into tonight's conversation. We all have twenty four hours.
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Right, what makes some of us average, makes some of us good?
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Something great? It's not the family you was born into. Right, has
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nothing to do with that, has none to do with your social economic status.
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It has everything to do with how you command your life. So if
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you have a bad day, which is no such thing of it doesn't exist.
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You had a bad moment and you were so immature that you let that
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moment dictate the rest of your day. Right, and you're not kids no
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more. I don't do elementary school. I don't do elementary school because they
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really a fifth grader. If I'm talking to a third grade, fourth grade,
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and fifth grader, kindergartner, I don't care what I tell them.
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They're not at a place of maturity where they can switch their mindset their kids.
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You grown, and some of you are grown, but you're still a
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child. And you brag about how you're an adult. You're only an adult
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because of your age. You're not an adult because you command your life.
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You're adult because of your age, And that's not what makes adulthood. I
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an adult because you are eighteen years old, you twenty five, twenty six.
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If you still kept catching timper tangents, you still getting attitudes, that
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means you're not an adult in that area. That means that particular area controls
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you. Right, you almost got into a car accident, car accident over
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with, car accident been over with ten hours ago, you still pissed about
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it, or you done got into it with your friend that happened two days
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ago, and y'all still not talking. That's immaturity, right, And let
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me tell you something. You don't know how many days you have, Like
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I'm just gonna keep you one hundred. You don't know how many days you
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have left. You don't want to be wasting days, like you're not God,
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like you don't create, you don't you can't wake yourself up. You
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don't know how many days you have left. You can't be playing with the
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days you have on foolishness. So you have to learn how to control yourself
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right, and so y'all know my circumstances. I'm not here because I'm sweet.
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I'm here because one day I was like, yo, even need to
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get a control of this brouh You need to get control of your life.
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You do not have control. You watch a dog on TV playing video games,
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and you should be out of your grinding. So there are people all
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day a people are et. Bro, you do not want to be me.
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You're not ready for this grind. Bro. Some of you you can
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show up when you're at home. When you go on the road, you
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struggle, meaning that when things are going the way you want, you cool.
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But when it rains, you like you gotta grow up. Your body
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does not control you. If the money, if I got to get up
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early in the morning and get the money, I'm a morning person. If
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I gotta go play somebody in their hometown and they got home or the bank,
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I'm about to come bring the eed, like, listen to me,
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Like you gotta stop playing. So most of you, what happens is when
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everything is favorable, you a beast. Make sure you understand what I'm saying.
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When everything is favorable, meaning like whatever conditions you like. When those
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conditions are right, you are beast. But when the conditions ain't right,
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you get smacked in the face. You gotta grow up. You gotta make.
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You gotta make every you gotta make. You gotta be a morning person,
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afternoon person, night. You gotta be at home, person, on
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the road person. You gotta be when you when you when you feel good,
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person, when you sick, person, when you tire your person.
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I took an offensive, my man, look at me, you tire.
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I'm like, bro, have you lost your mind? About to kill it?
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Why do back to back speeches? Four o'clock to five? Then they
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wanted me to wait till eight to start again. I had to sit there
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for three hours and wait and can't and like, let's go each one of
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us. The things that you don't have control over is the things that's keeping
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you from being sweet. And at one point are you gonna fight against that
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that nature in you that you know? So if I was an ass,
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most of you already know what your challenge is. You ain't dumb, you
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know what it is. You just don't fight this, and I'm challenging you
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to fight it. And the only reason you're having a bad day is because
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of what you're thinking about. Now. I read something that said that the
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human brain is phenomenal and they could think like of a million and something different
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things, right, it's just it's explosive. But the one thing it cannot
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do is it cannot think of two ideas at the exact same time. It
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does not have the capacity to think of two things at once. Now has
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the capacity in an hour to think about a whole bunch of stuff, but
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at one particular moment, it cannot think about more than one thing. So
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if you're having a bad day or having a bad moment, it means you're
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probably focusing on what whatever that bad thing is. That's what you're focusing on.
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That's why your life messed up because you focused on the stuff that's wrong.
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You're not putting the same energy on what's right. And it's just weird
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how we are as humans. We notice the bad and we talk about the
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bad, but we don't notice the good and talk about the good. We
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don't harp on the goods, and that's what you do wrong. You focus
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so much on the negative that you forget all the positive, and then when
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you do think about the positive, you're not putting the energy in the positive
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like you put in the negative. So it's no secret you are where you
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are because you focused on stuff you ain't got no business focusing on. Mmmm.
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Let me let me just take a deep breath before I just even jump
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into tonight's conversation, because every time I watch that video, that just gives
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me the motivation to get up and keep going every day. I know it's
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rough, y'all, I know it gets hard, but I don't want you
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to ever give up. I'm gonna try not to get emotional tonight, I
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promise, but I want y'all to never give up, regardless of how life
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how hard. Let me let me back up, regardless of how hard life
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gets. I don't want you to ever give up. I know life can
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life. I know people cut people, I know things can happen, but
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I don't want you to ever give up. I want you to keep going
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because we're all put on. We're all here for a reason, we're all
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here for a purpose. We're all gifted. Regardless of what people say,
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everyone's gifted. Everyone's talented. Everyone's a beautiful person, good, bad,
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ugly and different. But I want you to always know that you're worth it.
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I want you to just really sit down and take a look at yourself
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and focus more on the positive and less on the negative. And like you
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said in the video, we put so much energy into the negative that it
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starts to outweigh the positive. So we have to start the way we speak
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amongst ourselves. We have to change the way we speak about ourselves. You
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get what I'm saying. Sometimes you have to just speak, not even sometimes,
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but your gotta keep speaking it into existence, and just know that it's
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gonna get easier. God never said anything was gonna be easy. He never
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said life was gonna be easy. He did say weapons were formed, but
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they will never prosper. So you have to remember that. You have to
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utilize that, and you have to hold on to that and just know,
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regardless of what you go through in life. I almost keep saying this and
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saying this over and over and over again, please don't ever give up.
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Please don't ever give up. I know it gets rough, I know it's
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difficult, I know it's easier said than done, but don't give up.
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Please, don't give up. I have to say that to myself every day,
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Ashley, get up, get up, keep going. I know this
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is not where you want to be right now, but you gotta go through
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the rolls and the punches to get where it is you're trying to go.
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So dropping the comments again, y'all know, before I start in this show,
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I always do my mental health check ins always because I want to know
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where you are mentally, emotionally, physically. Me. Let me say this.
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When I had to go back and have another surgery, it threw me
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for a loop because I say, well, damn, was it even worth
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me going through everything that I'm going through? What may Maybe there's a reasoning
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and all of this, Maybe there's a purpose and all this I don't know.
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So which leads me into tonight's conversation workplace bullying. What is it?
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How does this affect your mental Those that have followed me from the beginning all
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the way into now, y'all have seen my story. Y'all have been with
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me on my journey, my ups, my downs, my highs, my
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littest baby, y'all have been there for me, and I appreciate y'all on
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that. But this one really hits a little close to home for me because
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I had to take some time off from work. Job burnout is reached.
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Workplace bullying is reaf Although I've never experienced it, but the person that I'm
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gonna speak about tonight experienced it, and unfortunately she took her life. So
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tonight's conversation is working place bullying? What is it? What is workplace bullying?
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Have you experienced? What do we do about it? If we ever
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encountered, what do we do? How do we handle it? How do
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we balance a toxic work environment and still try to stay seen a baby?
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I'm really trying to figure that out. So tonight's conversation, not only am
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I going to be speaking about workplace bullying, but I'm also going to speak
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on doctor Bonnie Bailey. Doctor Bonnie Bailey was the vice president of student Affairs
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at Lincoln University of Missouri. Unfortunately, on January the eighth, twenty twenty
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four, doctor Bailey took her life. Doctor Bailey was a victim of workplace
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bullying. HM, y'all know, I am so passionate about the conversations and
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the topics that I speak about. This one really kind of hit close to
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home, So workplace bullying what is it? For those that don't know.
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Workplace bullying refers to the repeated unreasonable actions of individuals that can be directed towards
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an employee or employees y'all, which is intended to intimidate and create a risk
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to the health and the safety of the employees. Why do people bully people
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for the same reason heard people hurt people. I've had the pleasure of sitting
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down today and speaking with a couple of people who've experienced workplace bully to the
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point of these people were ready to end their lives behind the job. A
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place that is supposed to be a safe environment for you, a place that
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you utilize to support your livelihood, can also be a toxicist. I'm pacing
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myself as I do this episode because I'm really, like I say, I'm
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really, really, really not trying to get so emotional that I can't get
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through my show. Y'all know why I am. But speaking with these people
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today, I didn't realize that I had experienced workplace bullying and my previous employer
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a very toxic work environment to the point where I had to beg My doctor
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put me on some medication because this is not right, So hold tight.
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We're gonna go a little further into detail about workplace bully. Workplace bullying can
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affect you physically and take a terrible toll on your mental health, and tragically
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can end in a person taking their own life. Now, SLI, you
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claim you experienced workplace bullying and it eventually led you to contemplating ending your life.
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Correct. Yes, I worked for corporations and startup organizations for over a
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decade, working with really ethical leaders. So when I decided to go out
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as a contractor and start doing some work on my own, I was surprised
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by the things that I experienced as being a contractor versus employee because the protections
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aren't necessarily the same, and the amount of unethical things that I encountered were
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shocking. And in one organization, I was working with a government and I
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basically set up my desk for seven and a half out of eight hours a
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day, not doing any work. I was asked to put together a budget
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and went to go meet with people to get budget numbers and they're like,
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don't worry about it, just make up the numbers. I didn't feel good
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about it, and it was against my moral compass to get paid for not
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doing any work, and I was getting paid a lot of money, and
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so I decided to resign. One of the managers I was working with said,
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hey, come over to my team. So I came over to the
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other team and started working. But my other manager, who was very big
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on her reputation, started a counterattack against me and started undermining the things that
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I did, started campaigning to discredit me, and it just became very uncomfortable,
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and for me, I became stressed. I had an anxiety. Then
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I couldn't find employment, and I'm like, what's wrong with me? And
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then at a certain point I couldn't pay my bills and I had to go
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to court. They wanted me to go to debtors court because I couldn't pay,
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and I couldn't do it, and I was not thinking about ending my
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life. And I woke up. It was dark, it was heavy,
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I couldn't focus, and within a matter of hours, I just went into
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the spiral and I called my brother Johnny, because I was a caregiver for
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my mom and she recently passed last year and I just wanted to know that
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she was going to be okay, and he realized that I was breaking down,
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and he kept calling back and he saved my life. And I want
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to bring awareness to the negative impacts of an ethical workplace bullies and the impact
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and the danger that they caused to lives. And we're told to be good
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people and it shouldn't be so difficult. But that's why I'm sharing my story,
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as painful as it is. Tell me your internal dialogue at the point
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that taking your own life seem like a reasonable choice. How did I get
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here? I did everything that I was told to do. I was told
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to speak up against on ethical activities. I was told to do the right
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thing. But I'm the one that's on the outside looking in. And the
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people that were doing it to me, the people that were unethical, they
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still have their jobs. And now I start thinking I'm worthless, I'm no
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good, what's wrong with me? Why can't I do any better? So
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then you start transferring those feelings to yourself and blaming yourself for it, and
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it starts to wear you down. I didn't know what depression was. I
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heard the term, but I didn't know what it was until it happened to
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me. Workplace bullying is a real thing, and it can have a devastating
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impact, and it almost needlessly led to me ending my life. First off,
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I'm sorry for your loss with your mother. Thank you. I know
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that's a very difficult thing to do, and it's it's interesting to me that
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you managed that situation. But when people are tearing down your integrity and your
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work ethice and your morality, they're tearing down the core of who you are,
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and that's what got to you. That's your base, absolutely, And
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for me it was I knew that if my moral compass was here and I
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adjusted just a little bit the next time, then I say, okay,
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well I was here before and it wasn't that bad. Nelton, let me
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adjust again. And I said, no, that's not who I am.
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It was against my morals, my values, my ethics, my beliefs,
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and I wasn't going to change those because if I change those, I wouldn't
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be the person that I want to be in the person that I am today
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that can share my story and change this so that it doesn't impact other lives.
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Do you have a story or a question for me? Click the link
22:41
in the description and tell me what in the world is going on sitting and
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listening today, young man, that that gentleman tell his story is so familiar
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to me. I remember when my father passed away back in twenty twenty one.
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I had just come back from medical leave. I had had two hand
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surgeries that I had just come back from having my second hand surgery, and
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I remember having a breakdown on the phone with a customer and I begged I
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I need some time off, just a couple of weeks, just because I
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was still processing the fact that I had just buried my father, you know.
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And I remember being told no. I even told him I'll take leave
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without eight. That's just how serious it got till finally to the point I
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ended up leaving that company. And this was a this is a Fortune five
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hundred company who didn't take my mental health seriously. When I told them I
24:11
needed a break, I was at my breaking point again. I had just
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buried my father, you know, So it was like, I just need
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a couple of weeks to process this. I just need some time to get
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my mental collectively so that way I could perform my job. And to be
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told no, even though I said I'll take leave without pay, I was
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willing to afford go paying my bills I was willing to risk it all just
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to get my mental back in check, till finally I said, you know
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what, I'm not. I'm not I'm not fixing to do this with y'all.
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I'm gone. Fuck. This is what I said, because to me,
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my mental was more than anything. My mental was more than it was
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worth more than a job. It was worth more than the people around me.
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That's you know, So hello miss Judge Sarah Heidi. She says,
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I've worked for a fortune five hundred company. She said, this is an
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ongoing issue, absolutely, and the saddest part about it is these companies do
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not take your cross for help seriously. And this is why you're seeing the
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suicide rate increasing. Not only are you dealing with the stress at work,
25:45
but you're dealing with the stress at home. You know, in this day
25:48
and age now, you got people that are working to they're having to work
25:52
two or three jobs just to make ends. Me that's stress within itself.
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And then that you're reaching out to your job, You're telling your job,
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hey, I need a break, I need to go out on FMLA,
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I need to take some type of short term disability. These jobs don't give
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a down and I just learned that recently. Like I say, welcome everybody
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to a Black Girl Interrupted. My name is Ashley. I am the creator
26:22
of Black Girl Interrupted. Again. Anyone that has followed me from the beginning,
26:26
you know my story. But I had to take a step away from
26:32
my current employer simply because my hair was falling out. It got to the
26:37
point where I couldn't sleep at night. I'm sleeping two three hours a day.
26:44
I'm on medication, but nobody's listening to me. So I had to
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go to my doctor and I told my doctor, I can't do it.
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It's dark for me, and I had to take control of my mental I
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really didn't realize and understand how death changes a person. I lost my father,
27:18
my niece, a lady that was had been in my life since I
27:23
was a little girl. She was like a sister to me, all within
27:29
a six month time frame, so I didn't have time to greet. So
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it started to take a toll on my mental and I realized I have three
27:41
children, hear, that need me, So I have to get my mental
27:45
together. So when I went to my doctor, I told him, I
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said I can't do this anymore. I'm done. I'm tired. Yeah,
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I have a cool manager. I do she's I could speak to her.
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I could talk to her about a lot of things, but I don't believe
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she took the issues that I was going through seriously. So I said,
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I'm gonna show y'all that I'm gonna put my mental first before in a job.
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I will no longer allow a job to compromise my mental. Judge says,
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it's what have you done for me lately? Mental? Right, It's
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like, we don't care what you got going outside. We need you to
28:45
show up for us. Fuck that, y'all. To hell with that.
28:49
Exchoose my language, but to hell with that. Stop letting these jobs compromise
28:56
your mental. Let me tell you something. That's why PE is there.
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If you get to a point in your life where you feel like you just
29:06
cannot go anymore, go to your doctor. Utilize that FMLA. That's why
29:12
it's there. Utilize that short term disability. That's what you pay for every
29:18
two weeks. You pay for those benefits. Utilize them. Stop allowing these
29:23
companies to dictate your mental I'm not allowing not narrow another job. Let me
29:29
see this to compromise my mental by PTO or I'm gonna use it. I
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don't give a damn what y'all got going on. If I feel like I'm
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getting back down in a dark place, or baby, I'm gonna take that
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time off from work. I'm not gonna allow another company to bully. I'm
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not doing it to help with that. I don't think y'all really understand why
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I go so hard and advocate for mental health. I've been in those dark
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places. I know what it feels like. I know what it feels like
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when you don't have anybody to talk to, or when you feel like you
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don't have anybody to talk to. Yeah, you have the employee assistance program
30:18
where they say, oh, you can utilize that to get your ten therapist
30:22
session sessions or your five therapist sessions. Sometimes you need a break from everything,
30:30
and I call that a reset. And I took a reset from work.
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That's how I knew when I started making simple mistakes, when my sleep
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habits started to change, when it got to a point where my hair started
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falling out, I'm irritable, I'm frustrated. I was experiencing job burnout.
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These jobs, they hear you, they just don't care as long as you
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show up for them. That's all that matters these people. Let me tell
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you, if you die today or tomorrow, baby, let me take they're
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gonna have your job, post it before they can even take your body out.
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The more we're so loyal to these companies, they're not even loyal to
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us. I sit and I listen to people when they say, oh,
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girl, you know I don't want I can't afford to take off. I
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get it. Use that PTO baby, that's paid time off, and that's
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also preparing the others. What can we do, y'all? We have to
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take care of ourselves. We have to take care of ourselves. A lot
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of y'all don't understand the fact of workplace bullying and how that can affect your
32:05
mental health. Workplace bullying, it could be detrimental to your mental health and
32:13
your emotional wellbeing. Listen to me, y'all, follow me with this.
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Workplace bullying can cause stress, anxiety, and depression. Forty five percent of
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people who have been subjected to office bullyings suffer health related issues due to stress.
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And I got this from the zip Doo data. Y'all already know anytime
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I speak on these topics, I'm gonna always give you statistics. I'm not
32:47
gonna ever pull anything out of the air out of the sky. But forty
32:53
five percent of people experience that have been subjected to the office bullying suffer health
33:07
related issues due to the stress. Do you know? Stress is the number
33:13
one killer. Stress can cause you to have a stroke, a heart attack,
33:22
raise your blood pressure. Stress will kill you. And it's unfortunate that
33:30
we allow these jobs to do this to us for fear that if I take
33:37
time off from work, am I going to have a job when I come
33:39
back? And that's how these companies make you feel. It's almost like they
33:49
give you the PTO, but they don't want you to utilize it. It's
33:55
they threaten you. You know, Oh, you can't take time off around
33:59
this time? Why not? That's what I paid for every two weeks,
34:05
right, I pay intil my paid time off. Right. I work to
34:09
accumulate that time to take off, right, So how were you gonna tell
34:14
me that I can't use the time for myself? How are you gonna get
34:20
upset with me because I woke up today and said, you know what,
34:22
I don't want to go to work today. How can you dictate how I
34:28
feel emotionally or mentally? How can you tell me that? And this is
34:31
what these this is how these companies make you feel. I was reading I
34:39
saw a post on TikTok today a man got into a car wreck, and
34:46
when I say, a very bad car wreck. And the boss or his
34:52
manager, whoever, the person they were communicating with, said, well,
34:57
what time do you think you're gonna be able to make it into work today?
35:01
Are you serious? This person could have been killed and all your concerned
35:08
with is them still being able to come to work, Not how are you?
35:15
Are you okay? Is there anything I could do? But are you
35:17
still coming into work today? When I saw that post, y'all, that
35:23
made me sick in my stomach. But this but shit like that, it's
35:31
real, it says a survey by the Workplace Bullying Institute. That's a real
35:42
place, y'all, that's a real facility, found that around thirty percent of
35:45
American workers have experienced bullying in the workplace. Thirty percent. Again, as
36:00
long as you show up for them, that's all that matters. They don't
36:02
care what you got going on. They don't care that you just got into
36:07
a wreck, They don't care that you had to rush your your baby to
36:09
the emergency room at three o'clock in the morning. They don't care. We
36:15
just need you to come to work. We need you to show up because
36:21
we have important deadlines we have to meet. That's all they're concerned with.
36:27
It's never are you okay? Is there anything we could do? Uh?
36:31
Call me, keep me updated, or they want you to call and keep
36:36
them updated. They want to know when you're coming to work. They want
36:40
to know what time you're gonna be there. Or we're sorry that you have
36:44
to take your baby to the hospital at three o'clock in the morning, but
36:45
what time are you coming to work today? Or we're sorry that your mother
36:50
passed away, Or we're sorry that your loved one passed away, but are
36:52
you coming to word today. That's all they can, that's all they're come
37:00
certain way sick discussing. This is why I'm working so hard, you know
37:08
what, to be my own boss, so that way I don't have to
37:10
deal with that. So I encourage everybody utilize those gifts that you have,
37:22
give that side hustle one hundred percent, so that way you no longer have
37:25
to experience the bullshit that goes on with these jobs and these companies because all
37:31
they're concerned with is you showing up for them. Going back to her comments,
37:38
she says, you know again, it's what have you done for me
37:42
lately, mentality. I just need you to show up for us. We
37:46
don't care about anything else, sick say. Also, it says more than
37:58
sixty percent of work place bullying cases result in the resignation of the bullied employee,
38:05
while the aggressor remains at the company seventy percent of the time. Let
38:12
me reread that again, more than sixty percent of the workplace bullying cases results
38:21
in the resignation of the bullied employee, so which means we're the ones that
38:25
end up putting while the bully still stays there to torment somebody else. Such
38:39
a sass as that were we live in. I remember when jobs used to
38:45
care. I remember when people used to be concerned. Now it's all about
38:52
money. We need you in this chair to make us our money while we
38:59
pay you pennies. We make these companies millions and billions of dollars and we're
39:07
paid pennies. And the moment we say I'm experiencing some type of mental health
39:15
issue, oh well, we're sorry, but but it's never we're sorry,
39:24
period. It's always we're sorry, but we still need you to come to
39:29
work today. We still need you to do this for us today. We
39:30
still need you to do that for us today. That's what has come down
39:36
to. So I found a video y'all that really explains what to do if
39:45
you experience workplace bullying. But before we even get into that, how do
39:52
you even recognize what workplace bullying is? Dropping a comments and let me know,
40:00
how do you recognize what workplace bullying is? I pulled up a couple
40:05
of bullet points that some of y'all may can relate to. Some of y'all
40:10
may be experiencing this right now. So it says, your tormentor constantly makes
40:20
hostile comments, insults, and digs at you, ridiculing the way you talk,
40:25
look at and behave. They may even call into question how did you
40:30
get this far in your career. I've experienced two of those. I won't
40:40
disclose the company, but just know it's a Fortune five hundred company that whatever
40:50
hostile to me. When I went to them and told them my father passed
40:53
away, I need some time off from work. Yeah, they gave me
40:57
my little three bereavement days three days. I really think that needs to change.
41:09
I'm just gonna be honest with y'all. I think that part needs to
41:12
change. Three bereavement days or what is it five? If you have to
41:15
travel out of town, I think that needs to change. Another way to
41:24
tell if you're experiencing workplace bullying, they intentionally withhold critical information needed to do
41:32
your job, sabotage your career, and take credit for work that you did.
41:38
That last one I've absolutely experienced. And I didn't know that that was
41:45
considered workplace bullying. Never knew that. And you know, and I'm pretty
41:50
smart, y'all, I'm pretty intelligent, you know, but I didn't know
41:53
what that was. So again, I found a video where we're young ladies
42:04
speaks about what to do. Here we go, Hey, guys, this
42:10
is Anne Marie coming at you as the antihr HR lady, and today I'm
42:15
going to give you a little HR tip about recognizing or identifying workplace bullying and
42:21
things that you can do about it. So what's workplace bullying? It's usually
42:24
behavior that is targeted on a group or individual groups by individuals or a group
42:31
by a person in the workplace, often a person with authority, but sometimes
42:37
it's not even someone with authority, and it's usually behavior that it can be
42:40
verbal or nonverbal harassment, abusive language, and it often results in emotional stress
42:50
and mental anxiety for the people who are receiving it or the individuals receiving it,
42:54
especially when it's over an extended period of time. So, once you
42:59
recognize that you are at the receiving end of workplace bullying, what can you
43:02
do about it? And is there anything that you should be aware of the
43:06
answer is yes, you can do something about it, and there are things
43:08
that you should pay attention to. So the first thing to do is,
43:10
of course, recognize bullying for what it is. But once you do recognize
43:15
that you are dealing with a bully, whether it's your manager or coworker,
43:19
there are things that you should do immediately. An important thing to remember is
43:22
regardless of the type of bully you're dealing with, it's not necessary for you
43:28
to accept the behavior. If someone is engaging an abusive behavior towards you in
43:32
the workplace, you have the right to ask them to stop. You do
43:37
not have to accept it, whether they're doing it to everyone or they're targeting
43:40
you. One of the first things that you should do is to tell them
43:45
that you feel that they're bullying you and you would like them to stop,
43:47
and then document their response, whether there's retaliation, whether they change their behavior,
43:53
because those are things you would also want to report to HR when you
43:58
raise the issue with them. One of the first things that you should do
44:00
is start documenting right to get a documentation journal. I actually have one of
44:06
the link in my bio. Start documenting your workplace from the first day of
44:09
employment. It's extremely important. I have a blog post that I wrote about
44:13
why it's important and why you should do it from the very beginning. So
44:17
start documenting. Start writing down the incidents, who was there when it happened,
44:22
and so on. And then the next thing you should do is determine
44:27
whether or not you can make a claim as an employee or whether there's other
44:32
action you need to take. Now, there are two things that you should
44:36
consider. First of all, does your employee handbook have an anti bullying policy?
44:42
Many employers now have those kinds of policies, but many do not,
44:45
so importantly look it up in your handbook. See if there's an anti bullying
44:51
policy in your handbook. If there is, follow the instructions about how to
44:55
report it to human resources. Sometimes they will have specific actions that they ask
45:00
you to take to report it, so make sure that you read the policy.
45:05
Now, what do you do if your employer doesn't have a policy about
45:09
anti bullying but you're being subjected to bullying in your office, Well, one
45:16
of the things that you want to consider is is the bullying targeted. So
45:22
sometimes you're going to be in a situation where you're dealing with a person who
45:25
is verbally abusive to everyone. They're just not a joy to be around,
45:30
their straight up asshole. Right. Then you may be dealing in a situation
45:34
where there's a person who is bullying and exhibits bullying behavior but only to specific
45:39
people in the workplace, And that second type of person is the person that
45:45
you may be able to take action against. It's a lot harder if your
45:50
workplace has no policy and this person is just a jerk who's horrible to everyone.
45:54
But if you have a manager or a coworker who only likes to pick
46:00
on the women in the office, or they like to pick on the person
46:02
with the visual disability, or they like to pick on someone because they don't
46:07
like their sexual orientation or their gender identity, or they like to pick on
46:13
someone on the basis of race or ethnicity. And notice they're only making smarty
46:15
comments. So the Muslim is on the office, or the black people in
46:19
the office, or the Asian people in the office, then you need to
46:22
start documenting that behavior. Pay close attention to it. If you're being subjected
46:27
to it, you want to document it, and then you want to bring
46:30
it up to human resources. If that person is your manager, especially,
46:35
go straight to human resources. If the person is a coworker, go to
46:37
the manager first if you feel comfortable doing that, or go straight to human
46:42
resources. But make sure that you don't just sit there and take it.
46:45
Report it right. So I've written a blog post about this. It's up
46:50
on my website. It's a little bit more detailed than this chat, so
46:52
you can go over there and read it. But the bottom line is,
46:54
if you're experiencing bullying in the workplace, there are things that you can do,
47:00
but the most important thing to do is to recognize it, start documenting
47:02
it, and then report it. If you don't feel comfortable doing some of
47:06
the things that I've mentioned on your own or you need more advice about a
47:08
specific situation, you can book a discovery call with me at the link in
47:13
bio. I'm always happy to chat and to help people one on one in
47:16
consultations to resolve HR issues, especially issues around discrimination in the workplace. So
47:22
I hope this tip was helpful. If you have questions or comments, drop
47:27
them in the comment or feel free to get in touch with me. This
47:30
is Anne Marie, the ANTIHRHR lady. Always remember HR is not your enemy,
47:35
but they're definitely not your friend. I am seeing the next video.
47:47
That last part was so accurate because HR works for them, they don't work
47:55
for you. And I found that out though oddly that HR works for them.
48:05
HR is there to protect them, not you. So some of the
48:12
tips that she said that she stated was to if you ever, how do
48:19
you handle the workplace bullying? So what you do is you enlist coworkers who
48:22
have witnessed the abuse and have them put it in writing. Sometimes that may
48:27
it may not work. Sometimes you work with people that don't want to get
48:30
involved, so they're not gonna help you. So now you got to do
48:36
this on your own. Another thing, ask for a transfer to another department.
48:45
That may not work. They may block you from going to another department.
48:52
One of the biggest things that you could do is that if HR fails
48:57
to take action, we'll find you an employment attorney. And if all else
49:04
fails, quitdn't find you another job. But let me say that on this
49:10
comment, do not leave a job until you have found employment somewhere else.
49:20
Let me repeat that one more time, do not quit a job until you
49:25
have another job to go into. Because one thing I put in a comment,
49:34
you deserve to feel safe and respected in the workplace. You shouldn't have
49:39
to get up every day and be like, damn, I gotta go to
49:42
work, man, I gotta deal with them again to day. You shouldn't
49:46
feel like that. To me, I feel like the work environment should be
49:51
fun regardless of what filled you're in. I believe you should still be able
49:55
to have fun but still do your job, y'all. Let me say that
50:00
I don't get up there at the people job and you get to act in
50:04
a clown and all that, but I feel like you should. You should
50:07
be able to have fun. Me personally, I'm I'm an introvert, so
50:12
I don't interact with everybody that I work with. I can count on one
50:15
hand the number of people that I talk to at my current place of employment.
50:21
I talk to one person, and one person only. I talk to
50:25
her at the job, and I talk to her outside of the job.
50:29
That's it. And the reason I do that is because I sit back and
50:34
I watch how people move and how they operate. And I'm gonna say this,
50:40
I like talking to that one person, and I'm gonna leave it at
50:45
that. I like talking to that one person because I've seen the bullying at
50:53
my current place of employment. I've seen the way higher ups speak to people.
51:01
One of the things that I don't like is when people get in these
51:05
positions you think you're better than everybody. Let me say this, stay humble,
51:13
because don't forget you were once sitting where we were before you got in
51:16
the position you were in. Take that how you want. And I said
51:29
what I said. I don't regret it, and I won't take it back
51:37
because I think it's unfortunate how you talk to people, and then you wonder
51:40
why you can't keep good employees. You wonder why it's a revolving door,
51:47
because I let me see not even say I think companies have forgotten how hard
51:53
it is to find good employees. And when I say good employees, I
51:59
mean that come to work through their job, don't create toxic workspaces. But
52:07
y'all make it very difficult for the good employees to stay. But you'll keep
52:09
the ones that and shit, you'll hold onto those, but you'll run your
52:15
good employees out the door with the toxic work environment. My last employer wanted
52:24
to bombard me with everyone else's job, but didn't want to give me any
52:29
more money. So when I spoke about it, they created a very toxic
52:35
workspace for me. So I said, okay. I still got up went
52:43
to work, but was still looking for another job in the process. So
52:47
while I was out on my medical leaves the day that I was supposed to
52:52
come back, I sent an email that morning and told them I will not
52:57
be returning to your place of employment because I was not gonna allow that job
53:04
to compromise my mental And this is what I stress to everybody. I've I've
53:07
made multiple posts throughout the weekend. I've told y'all stop allowing these companies to
53:14
compromise your mental health. And I'm gonna say that over and over and over
53:16
and over and over and over and over again. Utilize that PTO. Baby.
53:22
Let me tell you something, I don't give a fuck about nobody that
53:23
I work with at that job, and what you gotta go. I'm gonna
53:28
utilize my PTO. That's why you're there. I'm gonna utilize my PTO.
53:36
Those that follow me, I'm gonna repost I made a post with the well,
53:44
let me say this. I posted a link I'm with some tips on
53:46
how to maximize your PTO, how to get more days off throughout the year.
53:54
So I'll go back and I'll repost that on my page for those that
53:58
follow me. So let me jump into still the same conversation, but I
54:06
want to speak on doctor Bonnie Bailey. Doctor Bonnie Bailey m beautiful, beautiful
54:28
woman who unfortunately took her life on January eighth, twenty twenty four. Doctor
54:37
Bonnie Bailey was the vice president of student Affairs at Lincoln University of Missouri.
54:47
Let me take a deep break, h Doctor Bonnie Bailey became vice president of
55:06
student Affairs May of twenty twenty three. People around her noticed a change in
55:15
her. Doctor Bailey started to experience some mental health issues. Doctor Bailey reached
55:31
out not only to her higher up, but the higher ups above her higher
55:37
up, pleading I need time off from work, Doctor Bailey received an email
55:59
that pretty much told her, we're not getting involved in that. Doctor Bailey
56:08
was having some issues with the president, in which Doctor Bailey reached out.
56:16
She send emails and was met with or we're not getting involved in that.
56:23
This woman begged and pleaded for time off on work to get her mental together.
56:32
This woman was bullied to the point where she could no longer take the
56:37
pressures and ended her life January the eighth of twenty twenty four. When I
56:50
tell you, I'm begging and I'm pleading with y'all, please take your mental
57:02
health series. Please take that time off from work. If they won't listen
57:09
to you, go above them. Get employment attorneys involved, because there's no
57:21
way that this beautiful soul should no longer be with us. Here full tight,
57:31
here's her story. Vice president of a university she on a lives herself
57:38
because of excessive bullying. She attempted to seek help. Lincoln University President,
57:45
doctor John mostly Of and the board of curators are now under fire after the
57:51
university's vice president of student Affairs, doctor Antoinette Bonnie Candy Bailey took her own
57:58
life on the eighth of January. Bailey's passing has now sparked outrage from LU
58:05
alumni across the country, who are now calling for the resignation of that president.
58:13
President mostly new documents sent to Kate RCG and written by Candy Bailey on
58:22
the day she took online outlining university president doctor John Moseley as causing quote enough
58:32
harm and mental damage end quote. Multiple emails obtained by someone close to missus
58:40
Candia Bailey and shared with k RTCG shows that she sent emails to the president
58:49
of the university and to the Board of Curators outlining the request for family medical
58:57
lead and ADA Americans with Disabilities Act state that relationship excuse me between her and
59:07
the president went downhill due to her severe depression and anxiety. Sources state that
59:14
doctor Bailey was left quote unsupported, disregarded, and abused after countless attempts to
59:22
speak out on the bullying and harassment she experienced in her role from the university's
59:31
president. Doctor Bailey also reportedly discussed in a letter before passing the stigmatized bullying
59:42
she faced from the president and other leadership officials after disclosing her mental illness to
59:49
the university. Sources tell us that the administration failed doctor Bailey and her cries
59:54
for help and she'll no longer be allowed to lead Lincoln Universe City and I
1:00:00
concur Additionally, emails reveal that when she made complaints about how she was treated
1:00:07
to the Board of Curators, the board president wrote a response back to her
1:00:12
saying, part quote, please be advised the Board of Curators does not engage
1:00:16
in the management of personnel issues for Lincoln University and will not be taking further
1:00:22
action related to this issue. All right, well put them up full mask,
1:00:27
then welcome to the party. Board of Curators Lincoln University. Doctor Bailey
1:00:37
also wrote that she was intentionally harassed the bully and that after receiving a poor
1:00:44
evaluation, but she asks for help, the president doctor mostly ignored requests,
1:00:50
failing to respond to emails or when face to face, danced around the topic.
1:00:53
Chapter three of the Board of Curators by Laws, which have been in
1:00:59
effects is March thirtieth, twenty twenty three, covers operational guidelines for personnel.
1:01:05
That section of by laws is unclear whether the Board can take on any personnel
1:01:09
hr issues outside of hiring in certain circumstances, and her final email to the
1:01:15
president of the college on the day of death, Doctor Bailey also asks for
1:01:21
only select members of her sorority to be allowed to collect her things, saying,
1:01:25
Roseanne can speak with my family from the administration. You'll not to have
1:01:30
any contact. You've caused enough harm and mental damage. K RCG has reached
1:01:37
out to the administration at Lincoln University. They have declined to comment at this
1:01:42
time. On Thursday, the Board of Curators called a meeting for Friday three
1:01:46
pm with a partially open session agenda. The Jefferson community is now rallying for
1:01:52
accountability, utilizing the hashtag fire mostly to help raise awareness and shed light on
1:02:00
the beloved VP alumnis of tragic passing. University president has to go, you,
1:02:07
Board curators. In my opinion of feckless leaders, somebody should have had
1:02:13
an outs of humanity. This is an institution not simply of higher education,
1:02:19
but of higher connection, and it's unfortunate it happened this way. Ravana thoughts
1:02:22
here, Yeah, I mean, this is a horrific story. And not
1:02:27
only does this president need to go, they also I believe that her estate
1:02:32
needs to sue for a workplace harassment, potential disability discrimination. This is mortifying.
1:02:43
And you know, we talk about bullying a lot in relation to children
1:02:49
in school, but bullying is something you know that we see perseveres into adulthood,
1:02:53
particularly in the workplace. And you know, as the details laid out
1:02:59
here, she was being harassed by her direct supervisor, by the person in
1:03:05
a position of power above her, and she reached out to support from the
1:03:08
board and they shot her down. All of these people had a role to
1:03:14
play and her taking her own life and this tragedy, and you know,
1:03:19
there needs to be severe repercussions and insurance. Is that this that they're going
1:03:23
to take meaningful steps to ensure that this never happens again. I just need
1:03:37
a moment to take it in, But just a moment, because again,
1:03:51
there's no way that this beautiful soul should no longer be with us in the
1:03:59
present, in the physical. I'm so sorry. In the physical. This
1:04:06
is what I mean when I see take care of your mentor I get it.
1:04:27
There are people out here that pretend that something's wrong with them. I
1:04:34
understand. But this woman here was begging and for this company to write her
1:04:53
off. It's definitely heartbreaking. It's the it's sickening, and I hope that
1:05:06
her family holds their feet to the fire, although we know that won't bring
1:05:15
doctor Bailey back, but somebody needs to be held accountable for this. When
1:05:26
I took my time off from work, my mentor was all over the place.
1:05:42
No, I hadn't been there long enough to utilize my FM my LAI,
1:05:45
but I just knew I couldn't go another day. My sleeping habits changed,
1:06:00
my hair falling out. I'm making simple mistakes, but people weren't taking
1:06:13
what I was saying seriously. So when I went to go see my doctor,
1:06:17
my doctor said I, I'm pulling you off work. And it was
1:06:30
an involuntary lead. I didn't go in and and say, hey, Doc,
1:06:38
I need some time off from work. He said, I'm pulling you
1:06:41
off work. This woman sent countless emails. Not only was she bullied by
1:06:58
her direct report, but by the border curators who responded and said, oh,
1:07:11
we're not getting involved in that, so we're not gonna take any further
1:07:15
action. Doctor Bailey did what she thought was the best thing for her,
1:07:21
and that was the end her life. Doctor Moseley has been placed on administra
1:07:36
paid Let me let me stress that paid administrative lead. I feel like you
1:07:45
should be five for y'all to sit back mhm and allow this type of behavior
1:07:59
to go on. Y'all are responsible companies. Don't realize that y'all contribute to
1:08:15
the mental health of your employers employees. I'm so sorry. Let me correct
1:08:19
that employees. If your employee comes to you and tells you they're experiencing some
1:08:30
type of mental health crisis and you know this and you do nothing about it,
1:08:36
you're just as culpable do. I feel like Lincoln University needs to be
1:08:44
held account of by absolutely, and I don't even mean for the financial but
1:08:53
I feel like every person on that border curators needs to be looked into.
1:09:00
They need to be investigated because who's to say, excuse me that this is
1:09:09
the first time that they've done this. I hope and pray that this doesn't
1:09:18
happen to anybody else, because again, doctor Bailey, I looked at some
1:09:25
of her lectures, very intelligent, well spoken, who should still be here
1:09:34
with us. But here's what's going on now at Lincoln University. Lincoln University
1:09:46
community is reeling after the death of antoinette Candia Bailey, the vice president of
1:09:50
student affairs and a mentor on campus. If you know how you loved that
1:09:55
basically, But since then there has been an hour cry from students and alumni
1:10:00
to Lincoln's current president, John Moseley removed. I've said early on in the
1:10:05
administration that he was doctor Mosey was a novice, and he's demonstrated his lack
1:10:12
of skill and leadership in this capacity. Sherman Bonds, the Lincoln University National
1:10:16
Alumni President, sent a letter to the Board of Curators following an email she
1:10:20
wrote a manifesto, a letter to doctor Moseley given directions toward improvement in his
1:10:31
leadership. According to Bond's the email alleges Mosley harassed and bullied Candya Bailey.
1:10:36
In an interview with NBC News, Candya Bailey's mother and husband say she had
1:10:40
a strained relationship with Mosley and was fired on January third. Between five days,
1:10:45
her level of despair was beyond hope and she took a life. In
1:10:54
a press release, the university says it values mental health, saying quote,
1:10:58
as a board, we are committed to make sir and the mental health of
1:11:00
Lincoln university employees is a priority and that every employee is always treated with dignity
1:11:05
and respect. But students like Zoe want more from the university. I do
1:11:11
look forward to seeing the resignation or firing of doctor Moseley. I just feel
1:11:15
like at this point we're under poor leadership, and says it goes further than
1:11:19
just Moseley. This is unprecedented in terms of what we expect from the Board
1:11:27
of curators. We expect compassion, we expect resolve, and we expect immediate
1:11:33
action, and we don't have that. Elliot Oliver Ta, Camuate News,
1:11:38
Jefferson City. Thanks for watching. Stay updated about breaking news and top stories
1:11:44
on the NBC News app, or follow us on social media. I just
1:12:00
want to know why. I really want to know why these emails went unanswered.
1:12:15
I want to know why her mental health issues weren't taken seriously. And
1:12:25
I hear this so much from jobs or we value your mental health, or
1:12:30
we take mental health so seriously, or we advocate for mental health bullshit.
1:12:39
You know what, Let me let me, let me let me retract that
1:12:43
some companies do, but a majority of them don't. Again, a majority
1:12:48
of these jobs just needs you to be there for them. They don't They're
1:12:55
not concerned with what you have going on, whether mentally, whether it be
1:13:00
physically, whether it be something with your children. They don't care. They
1:13:10
just want you to be there for them. That's all they want you to
1:13:15
do. We need you to show up for us. We're sorry, you're
1:13:18
you know you're going through what you're going through. But it's gonna get better.
1:13:23
But I need this on my desk by five o'clock to day. Those
1:13:29
are the responses that people are being met with, And then you wonder why
1:13:31
suicide is on the rides. These jobs will stress you. I remember a
1:13:42
guy my sister used to work with had a heart attack at his desk at
1:13:46
work. At work, let me see this for twenty twenty four and beyond
1:13:59
where no longer allowing these jobs to disrupt our mental We're gonna take that PTO.
1:14:09
We're gonna utilize that PTO. That's what we're gonna start doing. We're
1:14:12
gonna utilize that PTO. We're not gonna sit and let that PTO accumulate to
1:14:16
the at the end of the year. Hell no, I'm utilizing my PTO
1:14:23
this year and every year after that until I become my own boss, because
1:14:29
that's the goal. We're gonna use that PTO. We're gonna take that time
1:14:35
off on work, even if it's not saying you have to go out of
1:14:41
town or you gotta take a trip baby, even if that's just a self
1:14:44
care day where you just lay in the bed all day and you just relax,
1:14:48
where you just laying the bed and you watch your favorite show where you
1:14:51
just do nothing. We're utilizing that PTO for twenty twenty four. We're no
1:14:56
longer allowing these companies to dictate when we take time off from work. I'm
1:15:01
not gonna let you tell me when I can and can't utilize my PTO.
1:15:05
I may wake up tomorrow and say, you know what I'm using, I'm
1:15:09
gonna use a PTO date. I may wake up and do that. I'm
1:15:16
not gonna let you tell me when I can and can't take off from work.
1:15:20
To hell with it now again, I'm not saying go into your job
1:15:28
and and do all that ride ride to the point you get fired. But
1:15:31
we're utilizing PTO for twenty twenty four. Take that time off. Stop allowing
1:15:41
these jobs to hold you hostage and tell you, oh, well, you
1:15:45
know, well, we can't be you know, we're gonna black out the
1:15:47
days because that's your problem. I'm gonna be off those days that that's y'all's
1:15:53
problem, and that's the stance that I'm gonna have at work going forward.
1:16:00
I'm utilizing my PTO. Don't call me on my day off, don't text
1:16:05
me on my day off PTO. That's personal time off, paid time off,
1:16:12
Prepare the others, and personal means that's my time, not your time.
1:16:16
That's my time. That's my time away from y'all. That's my time
1:16:20
where I utilize that day to just do whatever the hell Ashley wants to do.
1:16:27
That's what PTO is. That's my personal time off. That's my paid
1:16:31
time off. That's your prepare the others. That's what that is. That's
1:16:41
what we're doing. We're no longer allowing companies to use us anymore. What
1:16:54
happened to doctor Bailey? Let me post her picture back up because she's such
1:16:58
a beautiful woman. Doctor Bailey told them I'm struggling. I need some time
1:17:12
off, I need a break. Her direct supervisor bullied her. You gas
1:17:24
lit this woman, you antagonize this woman. But he's out on paid leap
1:17:33
again. Those emails, Doctor Bailey wrote she was intentionally harassed and bullied,
1:17:44
and that after receiving a poor evaluation, when she asked for help, he
1:17:49
ignored her request, or when face to face, danced around the topic.
1:18:01
And that's what I mean when I see these jobs, they don't give a
1:18:08
damn about us. They care more about what you could do for them and
1:18:12
less of what we could do for you. Is very disheartening that this has
1:18:21
happened, and I pray no other family has to experience this. Some of
1:18:33
the things that we could do is that the impact of bullying. Sixty one
1:18:48
percent of bullying is same gender, forty three percent of remote workers a bully
1:18:58
forty three percent and remote worker and have been for the last four years.
1:19:04
Thirty percent of American adults are bullied at work. And then you have seventy
1:19:12
six point three million workers, excuse me, are affected by bullying. Again,
1:19:25
I told y'all, let me remove this banner out the way. But
1:19:33
there are four psychological complaints that result from workplace bullying, and that's oppression,
1:19:41
anxiety, stress, and burnout. And when I tell y'all, I've experienced
1:19:51
all four even with my current employee I've experienced all four. I was talking
1:20:08
to my mom and I say, I didn't realize job burnout was a real
1:20:12
thing. My mama say, yeah, that is. I like my job,
1:20:20
y'all. Don't get it twisted, but I'm burnout at the same time,
1:20:28
if that makes sense. But I gotta do what I gotta do because
1:20:40
I gotta let this big job fund my little dream to where my little dream
1:20:45
becomes a baby, to where I'm able to walk away from corporate America and
1:20:54
do what I love doing, and that's being a podcast. Whatever gift or
1:21:04
talent that you have, please utilize it, Please utilize it. I'm gonna
1:21:18
go ahead and roll into the final thoughts of tonight. Workplace bullying is a
1:21:27
real thing. As the HR lady stated, if you're experiencing it, please
1:21:35
start documenting. Write down the dates, the time, the person or the
1:21:45
people that were there. Take it to HR. If you feel like HR
1:21:55
is not doing enough, get in touch with an employ employment attorney and see
1:22:02
what your next steps are. When it comes to your mental take care of
1:22:13
yourself. Put yourself first, because I can guarantee you if something happens to
1:22:23
you, they're gonna have your job posted the same day, if not the
1:22:28
next, utilize that PTO. Self care is imperative. I know because I
1:22:48
had to take care and I had to put me first. There are people
1:22:55
out here that love and depend on you. Put them first. Take a
1:23:06
break if you need to. There's nothing wrong with that. And don't let
1:23:13
your employer tell you or make you feel like if you take time off from
1:23:19
work you're gonna lose your job, because I've seen that happen to. Mental
1:23:31
illness is a real thing. Mental health is serious, and if you don't
1:23:42
start taking it serious, who will. That job is still gonna be there
1:23:49
tomorrow. It's not gonna kill you to take a day off from work or
1:23:57
two days all week, two weeks. They'll be all right. That's what
1:24:02
the other employees are there for. You. Taking a day off from work
1:24:10
is not gonna kill them. It's not gonna make them lose any type of
1:24:15
money. But do know that your life is everything, that you are valuable,
1:24:20
that you are worth it, You're beautiful, you're worthy that time is
1:24:35
for you. Don't feel bad on those days off, that you don't answer
1:24:42
those calls or you don't respond to those emails. They'll be there when you
1:24:47
get back, take care of whatever you have to take care of before you
1:24:56
go up and take that time off so that way when you come back to
1:25:00
work, you're refreshed, you're REJUVENI and if that doesn't work, start looking
1:25:10
for another place of employment. As I stated before, you deserve to be
1:25:16
respected in your work environment, to be safe, not messy and toxic.
1:25:30
I say all of that to say is I love you, I care about
1:25:35
you. I'm concerned. If at any moment you feel like it's getting dark
1:25:46
for you, please call the Suicide Prevention Lifeline. Let me move this banner
1:25:55
out of the way. There's the phone number. Please use it. Take
1:26:09
advantage of your EAP, which is the Employment Assistant program that does offer anywhere
1:26:15
from five to ten free sessions with a therapist. Utilize the resources that are
1:26:25
available to you. We need you here, we want you here. Here's
1:26:38
another link that's the blackmtalhealth dot com website forward slash suicide forward slash. If
1:26:49
you or somebody you know it's struggling with that mental please utilize these resources.
1:27:00
Please do it before it's too late. M Please know that your black mental
1:27:15
health does matter. I'm gonna post another page with some links. Let me
1:27:26
move the banner out the way. African American and Black specific mental health resources.
1:27:36
You have the Black Emotional and Mental Health Collective also known as BEAM.
1:27:45
You have Black Girls Smile, you have the Steve Fund, you have Therapy
1:27:54
for Black Girls, and then there's the African American Mental Health I'll leave those
1:28:01
links posted for just a few more moments, but please utilize these links.
1:28:12
If you're struggling, please reach out to somebody. Please do not suffer in
1:28:16
silence. Please don't don't don't suffer alone. Please don't suffer by yourself.
1:28:25
Mental health mental illness is real, and it's time for people to start taking
1:28:31
it seriously. It's time for you to start taking your mental health seriously.
1:28:39
It's time for you to start taking care of yourself. Pasis, hold off,
1:28:46
I'm gonna get my little fingers together, or there we go, Casis,
1:28:50
I love you, Good to see you tonight. But that's what I
1:28:56
want to take your mental health seriously. I can't advocate enough for it.
1:29:14
I got a little choked up, but I made it through an episode that
1:29:16
I didn't cry. It was hard, I made it through. So now
1:29:25
that Black Girl interrupted, that podcast is backing in full swing, baby,
1:29:29
I'm coming out the gates swinging on y'all. So now that football season is
1:29:36
over, well not completely over, but Black Girl Interrupted will now go back
1:29:44
to every Tuesday and every Thursday at eight thirty pm Central Time. The upcoming
1:29:49
episodes for Black Girl Interrupt the podcast. It's about to get tense, baby,
1:29:56
So Thursday night's episode, I will be discussing the two hundred and fifteen
1:30:00
bodies that were found behind the jail in Raymond, Mississippi. I'll be speaking
1:30:08
into that that is complete jesticide. Uh, and I will be speaking on
1:30:14
that, uh just kind of see. We're just gonna kind of roll out
1:30:19
in January, just you know, but February is gonna get beat. I'm
1:30:27
about to offend a lot of people, but y'all know, I really don't
1:30:30
give it. I don't care. Ah. But yeah, but Thursday night,
1:30:36
where we'll be discussing the again the police cover up in Mississippi. I
1:30:43
will be speaking about Dexter Wade, Mario Moore, and again the two hundred
1:30:47
and fifteen bodies that were found behind the jail in Raymond, Mississippi. Ah,
1:30:55
feel free to jump into the conversation, y'all. Don't forg get to
1:31:00
like comments, subscribe and share the black Girl Interrupted. If there's any conversations
1:31:04
or topics that you would love for me to bring to the table, please
1:31:09
send me an email to a Black Girl Interrupted podcast at gmail dot com.
1:31:15
I'm open to all topics, all conversations. If there's something going on in
1:31:23
your city that you want me to bring to the forefront, please don't hesitate
1:31:27
to let me know and we can make it happen if you would love to.
1:31:31
If you would like to be a guest on Black Girl Interrupted podcast again,
1:31:35
send me an email right here to a Black Girl Interrupted podcast at gmail
1:31:41
dot com. I would definitely set up a time where we can collect if
1:31:45
we get together and see what day works for you. But yeah, I'm
1:31:53
looking to doing bigger and better things will black Girl Interrupted. I will actually
1:32:00
with black Girl Interrupted, I'll be participating in a project speaking into mental health
1:32:09
and I'm very excited about that. I have some great collaborations that are coming.
1:32:15
I can't wait for you guys to see. But yeah, but for
1:32:19
twenty twenty four, a Black Girl Interrupted podcast is not taking no for an
1:32:24
answer with anybody. I will put this disclaimer out. I will support who
1:32:30
supports me. So let me go ahead and go on record, even though
1:32:35
I've made a post, please do not send me invites to like your business
1:32:41
if you don't support mine. I know that's a little blunt indirect, but
1:32:45
it is what it is. At the end of the day, I've poured
1:32:49
so much support into people and I've gotten nothing in return. So I'm gonna
1:32:54
stand on business with regards to that. I'm not trying to sound arrogant or
1:32:58
copy but again, I can no longer support unsupportive people. So take that
1:33:04
for how you will. On that note, I am gonna go ahead and
1:33:11
bring this episode to a close. I will see you guys Thursday at eight
1:33:15
pm Central Time nine pm Eastern Time. Again, I will still be streaming
1:33:20
live on YouTube as well as I will be streaming to Twitter. I will
1:33:26
also be holding Twitter spaces in between the time. Oh yeah, but I'm
1:33:33
about to do it real big for twenty twenty four, so I'm no longer
1:33:38
gonna speak on that. You just have to sit back and watch the glow
1:33:42
up. But I love you guys. Happy Tuesday. I love you.
1:33:50
I love love love love love love love love love you Again. Thank you
1:33:54
to the ones that tune in tonight. God bless you. I hope everyone
1:33:58
has a beauty for the rest of the night. I hope Wednesday will be
1:34:02
a beautiful thing. Oh, I do want to throw in the fact I
1:34:06
may be jumping on on Wednesdays for wellness Wednesdays. Maybe not long episodes,
1:34:13
maybe anywhere from thirty to forty five minutes, just maybe giving you some wellness
1:34:16
tips to help you make it through the week and on into the weekend.
1:34:21
Having worked out the specifics with regards to that, but that has been put
1:34:28
out for me to do with regards to doing things on Wednesday. But again,
1:34:33
I'm looking forward to doing beautiful, beautiful things with Black Girl Interrupted this
1:34:39
year, looking forward to the collaborations that I do have cooking up. I
1:34:47
excited about working on this project again regards to mental health. Again, catch
1:34:54
me on Twitter. I will be in hosting again Twitter Spaces. I will
1:34:59
be doing some live things on TikTok uh. But yeah, I got a
1:35:02
lot of stuff going on for a Black Girl Interrupted the podcast again. I'm
1:35:05
interested in collaborations, So yeah, let me post the email back up here
1:35:13
again. It is black Girl Interrupted Podcast at gmail dot com. Any ideas
1:35:18
any topics. Whatever it is you want me to talk about, shoot me
1:35:23
an email. Let's set up a time where we do a Google meet meeting
1:35:27
uh and and and work out the logistics and just go from there. But
1:35:31
again, thank you guys for tuning in to another episode of Black Girl Interrupted.
1:35:36
It absolutely feels great to be back in my space. I don't know
1:35:45
what else to see, but I love you guys again. Happy Tuesday.
1:35:49
I hope everyone has a great rest of the night. Oh yeah, I
1:35:53
do want to let you know, black Girl Interrupted. The Black Carpet Experience
1:35:59
is coming into four. I know. I was supposed to have launched it
1:36:01
last year, but some things came to pass that we had to really kind
1:36:06
of push some things back. So I am looking for black entrepreneurs, business
1:36:12
owners, whatever it is that you do. I want to sit down with
1:36:15
you. I want to know your story. I want to know how you
1:36:15
got started. So stay on the lookout for the Black Carpet Experience. For
1:36:21
those that don't know, here is a promo video for a Black Carpet Experience.
1:36:31
Here we go