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Transcript

The Wicker Man (1973) · Citizen Frame

• 0:00
  Chomp! Chomp! Chomp! Chomp! Chomp! Chomp!
• 0:05
  Music.
• 0:07
  Chomp! Chomp! Chomp! Chomp! Chomp! Chomp! Chomp!
• 0:16
  Chomp!
• 0:17
  Music.
• 0:33
  Okay,
• 0:38
  it's over. All right, everybody. Welcome back to another exciting podcast of
• 0:46
  Citizen Friend. Brian, you know, I let Trevor pick these next films because I'm a kind heart.
• 0:54
  Let's get that out of the way. I said, you know what? We'll do.
• 0:58
  And I knew even asking to pick three films, Wicker Man was going to be on the top list.
• 1:05
  I read reviews on it. I've never seen it. I've seen the Nicolas Cage one, which is terrible.
• 1:12
  And so I was just curious, because this is like a 7.5 on IMDb, beloved.
• 1:19
  It has rave reviews. No one really tried to touch it or do sequels to it.
• 1:24
  There's one called The Wicker Tree.
• 1:25
  I think the director tried to do some kind of different version of it.
• 1:29
  The Wicker Tree's not very good at all. Yeah. Well, it shows this man's talentless.
• 1:35
  So, whoa. He's a one-trick pony. He's a novelist in his main career. He's a novelist.
• 1:41
  This is his first time directing. The man's name is Robin Hardy. He's a one-hit wonder.
• 1:47
  But, yeah, you know, it's in it. We talked about this with Hereditary,
• 1:52
  The Witch, even The Lighthouse.
• 1:56
  We talk about these occult kind of films.
• 2:00
  I don't know if The Lighthouse would be actually up there, But,
• 2:03
  you know, Rosemary's Baby, you know, all these kind of films.
• 2:08
  And the reason I think this movie, The Worker Man, is successful is because
• 2:13
  it came out right at the right time.
• 2:15
  During a time where Hollywood was changing up gears and cinema was getting a
• 2:20
  little more darker and bleaker with Rosemary's Baby leading the way and then
• 2:24
  so forth in Texas and The Last House on the Left.
• 2:27
  These all came out, Exorcist, all these came out at the same time.
• 2:30
  So I think it landed at the right time.
• 2:35
  And everyone's really into these.
• 2:39
  And now, to this day, there's a resurgence for this occult horror kind of stuff. Folklore.
• 2:45
  Folklore. Okay, perfect. Like we mentioned with Eggers and so forth,
• 2:51
  these new directors who are going this route and fucking trees and fucking old people.
• 2:56
  Mermaids. Don't forget the mermaids. Oh, the mermaids.
• 3:00
  But I don't get it. So that's the problem I have.
• 3:03
  I don't like occult movies. I'm not into it. It's just stupid voodoo and worshiping
• 3:09
  pagan gods and all this crap.
• 3:11
  I'm not really – it's not my thing, so I wouldn't be fair to judge The Work of Magic.
• 3:16
  I'm going to be honest with you on that because I, from an outsider,
• 3:21
  I'm telling you now, this is one of the worst films I've ever seen,
• 3:24
  and I'm holding my cards to this.
• 3:28
  It is terrible, and I'm going to – and this is me actually being serious,
• 3:34
  folks. Folks, I need some guidance through this, please.
• 3:39
  I'm not going to go in shit like the lighthouse because that was just bullshit movie.
• 3:44
  This has something everyone is saying but me.
• 3:47
  Okay. I mean, this is so fucking hokey and stupid.
• 3:52
  I was literally waiting for H&R Puff and stuff or the Teletubbies to show up.
• 4:02
  So i have some good news for you i am
• 4:05
  here to be your guide to be your lord somers
• 4:08
  isle you know me i will keep you right you mean share that's in this and explain
• 4:15
  to you the errors of your ways i this i'm a complete opposite end of the spectrum
• 4:20
  here this to me is one of the greatest British films and horror films ever made.
• 4:27
  I mean, technically, there's no supernatural elements in this film.
• 4:30
  Technically, you could argue that it's not even a horror film, but we'll get to it.
• 4:35
  Now, the only kind of, I think to me, cult films, movies about the occult,
• 4:41
  they were their best in the 80s.
• 4:43
  In the 80s, you had quite a bit of this.
• 4:46
  And it was more balls to the wall, but it was also, I might as well say it,
• 4:51
  They're a little more spoon-fed.
• 4:53
  When these are like, what the fuck am I? Am I dreaming? What the fuck? Am I high?
• 4:59
  That was definitely what this film was about or something.
• 5:02
  But we had Serpent in the Rainbow by Wes Craven, which is brilliant.
• 5:05
  You guys need to see it. We might get to it. And then The Believers with Martin Sheen.
• 5:09
  Those two films are really good, and they're scary and creepy.
• 5:12
  Have you ever seen that one called, it's from around 1970, called Blood on Satan's
• 5:18
  Claw? It's a British one. Heard of it, though.
• 5:20
  Yeah, yeah, well, it would be part of that whole British tradition of what is
• 5:25
  now known as folk horror.
• 5:26
  It's more of, now the phrase folk horror is, it was coined more in more recent years by Mark Gatiss.
• 5:33
  So, but it's been around. I mean, you've like Witchfinder General with,
• 5:38
  you know, Vincent Price and stuff.
• 5:39
  And, you know, it's been around for quite a while. But, you know,
• 5:43
  it's only in recent years it's been known as folk horror.
• 5:46
  You know you even have that ari aster film
• 5:49
  from a few years ago which i did not like at all midsummer which
• 5:52
  it's basically a a remake an inferior remake of the wicker man to me but so
• 5:58
  the whole but there's a there's a long british tradition even come back to the
• 6:02
  hammers and stuff of this what is now known as folk horror yeah yeah well let's
• 6:08
  just jump into it and we'll see.
• 6:12
  Seymour, you're wrong. Yes, no problem. We've got the great,
• 6:15
  great Edward Woodward, who I like.
• 6:18
  I'm going to call him the equalizer because I wish I was watching the equalizer. So we'll call him that.
• 6:23
  Otherwise, he plays Sergeant Howdy, the great Christopher Lee,
• 6:26
  Lord Summer's Isle, the beautiful, beautiful Britt Eklund, the Bond girl,
• 6:30
  who also was in the same film as Christopher Lee in James Bond.
• 6:35
  Yes. The man with the golden gun.
• 6:37
  One of my favorite Bonds. Diane Salento. Miss Rose, you've got Ingrid Pitt,
• 6:41
  beautiful librarian, Lindsay Kitts as Alder, and Aubrey Morris,
• 6:45
  the very disturbing and creepy gravedigger.
• 6:49
  Yeah. We open up in April 29th, Sunday, April 29th, 1973.
• 6:55
  Now, is Sergeant Howdy, he's not a priest or anything on the side.
• 6:59
  He's just giving a sermon. He's just helping. No, he is a very straight-laced,
• 7:06
  Protestant sort of Christian.
• 7:10
  So he's basically, you know, he would very much be that sort of strict Presbyterian type of Christian.
• 7:18
  And, you know, obviously that sets up the great conflict with the... Yes.
• 7:22
  And of all the shit this film is, there's a jelly bean in it.
• 7:27
  Remember I always say that?
• 7:28
  You always try to find the jelly bean in pieces of shit.
• 7:32
  You always try. You do, Trevor. Always those B-bad movies, you always try to
• 7:36
  find some good silver lining.
• 7:38
  The gold dust? Yeah, I have maybe something.
• 7:42
  Go ahead. And it's that conflict. But we'll get to it.
• 7:46
  So let's start off with the terrible, terrible music in this film.
• 7:50
  Wow. The play sequence when he's flying...
• 7:54
  We get this terrible, terrible song called Corn Rigs or something.
• 7:59
  And it's like, Corn Rigs and Barley. Never forget the happy night.
• 8:05
  I was like, what the fuck is this shit?
• 8:07
  Do you not think, though, that it adds to the complete weirdness?
• 8:12
  This is basically a musical. Yes, it is. There's like 13 diegetic songs here
• 8:18
  within it. And they're terrible.
• 8:21
  They're terrible. How do you How can you sit there How can you sit there And
• 8:28
  watch this I can see people getting enjoyment out of it Because it is I will say this,
• 8:34
  I was not bored So you got me there There you go How does people call this.
• 8:42
  Terrifying How?
• 8:44
  I would say more to stop than terrifying Well
• 8:48
  it's basically The ending essentially and hard all
• 8:51
  sort of works out but especially that absolute
• 8:54
  shocker of an ending and it's totally anti-hollywood
• 8:57
  ending which we'll get to but regarding the music i
• 9:00
  mean it is an acquired taste i mean i remember whenever last year there was
• 9:04
  a 50th anniversary screening of the worker man that i went to see i've seen
• 9:08
  it multiple times over the years but i then reviewed it on my radio show and
• 9:13
  i played some of this music on my radio show and a lot of people were saying
• 9:17
  to me you you know, like I say, that
• 9:19
  included my own mother, who was saying awful music, you know,
• 9:22
  all that there, but and I get that, I get that, it's not for everyone,
• 9:25
  it's not casual listening, but what I would say in terms of... It's not listening.
• 9:29
  Yeah, in context of the film, it adds to the general folky weirdness of it.
• 9:36
  I just wanted to end my life.
• 9:39
  And then... You wanted to be burnt out of work, I'm not. Yeah,
• 9:41
  I was the fucking wicker man.
• 9:44
  So, you got these old bastards in the the boatyard. Yeah, the Farty Mountain
• 9:49
  stuff. Yeah, they're just being obnoxious. Here we are. Here we go.
• 9:52
  Trees and old people. Here we
• 9:55
  go. And then you got the fucking corn rigs playing again. It wouldn't end.
• 10:00
  I mean, fucking hell, stop with the music. There's other songs come,
• 10:04
  but there's other belters of songs that come later on.
• 10:10
  But the Maypole and stuff. So he's there to find the missing child.
• 10:15
  And we all know it's a set up. Yes. She's never been missing.
• 10:20
  They're there just to lure him. Why do they pick him?
• 10:23
  Well, it's explained later on because basically due to their beliefs,
• 10:27
  Whenever he's in the library reading about their beliefs, it's explained that
• 10:31
  they're basically to have a bountiful harvest.
• 10:34
  They need a man who is a fool connected to royalty, i.e. the police,
• 10:40
  you know, Her Majesty's sort of police force, but also a fool,
• 10:44
  which he becomes during the May Day Parade.
• 10:46
  But also, more importantly, a virgin, which goes back to his straight laced.
• 10:52
  There's there's different versions of this film with additional
• 10:54
  scenes where there's these guys like making fun
• 10:57
  of him because basically that his wife and
• 11:01
  he explains it himself later on where he doesn't believe in sex before
• 11:04
  marriage so he refuses to have sex with
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  his wife he's engaged by the way to be married and so
• 11:10
  because of his strict christian beliefs he has
• 11:14
  by his own choice be a virgin so it's
• 11:17
  basically at the end a virgin sacrifice that is
• 11:20
  why he is lured but also the whole sort of food thing
• 11:23
  that he becomes in the parade and also you
• 11:26
  know that there's like a man who would be keen but that's
• 11:29
  to do with him being part of her majesty's police
• 11:32
  force and so that explains the scene where
• 11:35
  this the horrible scene where brick
• 11:38
  at like willow is next door to his room slapping her ass and playing barbers
• 11:43
  with her ass and he's trying not to be enticed over there yes he is he's literally
• 11:50
  sweating and he's tempted he's so tempted and stuff Willow's trying to save his life.
• 11:56
  Yes yeah very much so in a way he's right to the brink of his basically dick,
• 12:05
  for want of a better word in 10 seconds.
• 12:09
  Tell me about it you know what I mean oh by the way just a bit of sort of a
• 12:14
  bit of a fact about it that's actually she was actually pregnant at the time,
• 12:18
  so that's actually an arse double for her.
• 12:21
  Yeah. Either way, it was a stupid scene, but okay. Now it makes sense.
• 12:26
  But a very erotic scene. No, it wasn't.
• 12:28
  It was not. She's hot, but... I'll give you only after saying yourself you'd
• 12:32
  be in there in 10 seconds. Well, it's Britt Eklund.
• 12:34
  I mean, she's beautiful, but that has nothing to do with the execution.
• 12:37
  She ended up doing pantomime in Belfast. What?
• 12:41
  Britt Eklund ended up doing pantomime in Belfast, on the Grand Opera House. Wow.
• 12:47
  Great. So there you go. Yeah.
• 12:50
  Yeah, then the music starts. And then we get this montage.
• 12:54
  So, the owner of the... He goes to this green bar.
• 12:59
  The green man bar. And he walks in there and he's checking in because he's going to stay there.
• 13:06
  Fucking music. I was like, am I watching MTV? What the fuck?
• 13:13
  MTV is a little bit more rocky. I wish I was watching MTV.
• 13:19
  If they played this on MTV, yeah yeah the
• 13:22
  landlord's daughter and which is a really sort of
• 13:25
  creepy song actually in terms of like listen
• 13:29
  to them you know they're talking about how they all basically and the landlord
• 13:31
  himself is singing it so it's like they're
• 13:34
  all basically talking about how they've all had her and shagged her yeah i
• 13:38
  know and there's even a scene where we're first introduced
• 13:41
  to dracula right and he
• 13:45
  yes he brings a little boy
• 13:48
  to britt ecklund willow's window and he goes
• 13:51
  to shagger yes what the fuck man you think
• 13:54
  this is yes and that's not what we're getting to the
• 13:57
  children dance where the naked girls yeah
• 14:00
  and i mean girls now obviously you can tell they're women playing the
• 14:03
  parts because they can't so naked girls but they
• 14:05
  technically are supposed to be yes this is pretty
• 14:09
  sick shit dude there's no
• 14:12
  well it has its basis it has
• 14:15
  its basis in sort of paganism.
• 14:18
  Where it's so from the sort
• 14:21
  of point of view of that i'm not fucking defending it by
• 14:24
  the way from but from the point of view of this sort of pagan cult
• 14:27
  it's all about basically sex
• 14:31
  and rebirth and nature and all this
• 14:34
  sort of thing even the stuff where they're talking in
• 14:37
  the school where the teacher's basically talking about
• 14:40
  the phallic symbols and the phallic symbols everywhere in
• 14:43
  this film so there is and the teachers andy and
• 14:45
  edward woodward bursts in and says that i am going to report you to the proper
• 14:49
  authorities you know for basically teaching them smut in school you know but
• 14:55
  he's right yeah i know but it's it's in terms of the script it's the conflict
• 15:01
  of straight-laced Christianity against,
• 15:05
  sexual... No, there's no... Okay, that's no against.
• 15:07
  That's my point. He is completely right. This is illegal.
• 15:10
  Yes, I know. This is illegal. If you had all... I'm gonna root for these people. Yeah.
• 15:16
  You're not a normal human being. Yeah, I'm not rooting for them.
• 15:20
  I'm sort of... But, you know, Harry, because it's a brilliantly written and
• 15:24
  played character, is quite sort of... Although you sort of agree with him,
• 15:28
  he's He wouldn't be great fun at a party, Harry.
• 15:31
  No, he's a douche. The character's unlikable.
• 15:34
  But that's one thing the film gets right. Yes. Because I have nothing but respect
• 15:39
  for this character at his final. Yes.
• 15:42
  Because he sticks to his guns the whole way through. Yeah, there's a fucking scene where...
• 15:48
  Easy-eating steak or something, and then there's these vegetables that look
• 15:52
  very sharp, you know, very clean and very vivid.
• 15:56
  And the colors. And he says, well, raw beans don't usually have this natural color of turquoise.
• 16:03
  Yes. Willow says something like, well, anything in their natural state have the vivid colors.
• 16:09
  Yeah. Fuck? Yeah. Yes. No, because they're obsessed with all of this,
• 16:13
  you know, the natural earth and everything that comes from the earth and rebirth
• 16:18
  and sex and all that sort of thing.
• 16:21
  But they've had a bad harvest the year before, so they're looking for better
• 16:26
  sacrifices to their sun gods.
• 16:28
  After listening to about five hours of horrible folk music and horrible food,
• 16:32
  he decides to go for a little walk.
• 16:35
  What does he find? As you do in a graveyard, a bunch of people fucking.
• 16:39
  Yes, and also there's like, yeah, women sitting naked on sort of tombstones
• 16:44
  and stuff. Yeah. Yeah. We're in Rome, right?
• 16:47
  Yeah. Fucking stupid film. This is so stupid. I would have been out of there in 30 seconds.
• 16:55
  But because he has a burden of duty to find this young girl or what he... I know, I know, I know.
• 17:00
  And that's the character who, I mean, he's a stubborn prick himself, so he's fucked.
• 17:07
  Because of his stubbornness.
• 17:09
  Yes. Well, I mean, he even says it himself, what you're saying.
• 17:11
  He even says, he says you you're all there's several times in the film he says
• 17:15
  you're all crazy you're all basically stark raving mad you know he says what
• 17:20
  you're saying he's saying it himself you know.
• 17:25
  Whatever. I don't know.
• 17:29
  Christopher Lee, by the way, whenever he was alive, he considered as his best work and best villain.
• 17:35
  Oh, this is stupid. It's his worst work.
• 17:38
  I've seen a lot of Christopher Lee stuff. I swear to God. So pretty much Dracula
• 17:44
  is a gigolo. That's how I know so far.
• 17:48
  Or a pimp. Yeah. He used to have the big floral jackets and the big Big high
• 17:55
  shoes, high boots, and with the cane, big fluffy hat.
• 18:00
  Well, later on, he dresses as the sort of, you know, the man-woman thing. Just like Cher.
• 18:07
  Yeah, that's for sure. So we got Dracula and Cher. We got Gigolo,
• 18:12
  Dracula, and Cher all in one.
• 18:15
  So it's morning time, and Willow's all happy, and I guess she's going to bet you she is.
• 18:21
  And and of course with
• 18:24
  more music as he's doing his walkabout and what
• 18:28
  the fuck is this you got some you got a bunch of
• 18:31
  fucking kids tied to a tree or something
• 18:34
  and they're all dancing as this dork in the middle is like the teacher or something
• 18:39
  and i mean this is fucking i was my jaw was dropped at this point i was like
• 18:45
  what the fuck how am i supposed to take this seriously And yet you're, I mean, again,
• 18:52
  I'm the odd man out here. Everyone else is seeing magic.
• 18:56
  You guys are seeing, oh, look at the mystical dance with the tree. And don't, don't.
• 19:03
  I think it's more the sheer weirdness and the bonkersness of it that people
• 19:07
  are sort of taken aback by, whereas you are like you're just hitting the floor.
• 19:13
  Because you, like you say, you know, I think it's more from your American background as well.
• 19:18
  You're not, you know. It's very popular in the States. That has nothing to do with it.
• 19:22
  Yeah. You can't sit there and say Americans aren't going to get fit. That's not right.
• 19:25
  This is a huge. I'm saying maybe some don't, you know. I'm not saying all.
• 19:31
  Everyone in Britain, everyone in the United Kingdom, they all love it because they can relate.
• 19:37
  No way. Are you kidding me? I think it's more.
• 19:41
  Actually, you know what? I'm glad if you think the US don't get to be like,
• 19:44
  what the fuck? And what's crazy Britain doing over there?
• 19:47
  This type of folk weirdness as well and paganism and stuff is well sort of embedded
• 19:55
  in sort of the history of the UK.
• 19:58
  K you know working back like you know hundreds maybe
• 20:01
  even thousands of years so people are quite sort
• 20:04
  of that they sort of know quite a bit about this type of thing in britain i'm
• 20:09
  not saying everyone obviously and then the same with you know you know so coming
• 20:13
  from coming in from an outsider's point of view people you will get people who'll
• 20:19
  say what the fuck you know and that's okay But,
• 20:22
  you know, and again, it's more the, for me, the creepiness factor of this is
• 20:28
  just, for me, is the general weirdness and just the sort of bizarreness, for me.
• 20:35
  Yeah, so, yeah, I mean, if grey fucking and...
• 20:44
  I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. And cockroach torture.
• 20:48
  I'm glad you found something in this is that you found a good yeah it's good for you.
• 20:56
  Obviously i'm not into it myself no no no
• 20:59
  no it's okay we'll just
• 21:02
  move on from that there is a certain element of british and
• 21:05
  you know not just british irish i mean all all
• 21:08
  sort of sort of countries and societies have their
• 21:11
  sort of folk type legends you know right across
• 21:14
  europe and beyond even you know in asian stuff
• 21:17
  so there is a historical context to all of this obviously it's
• 21:21
  dramatized for the film and you know sort of ramped up but yeah i mean there
• 21:26
  is some yeah i mean i mean there is a historical context to it all but there's
• 21:31
  just a general weirdness and creepiness in terms of if you do consider this
• 21:35
  a horror film which to be honest i do even though there are no supernatural elements in it,
• 21:40
  This is part of the creepiness factor. All of this basically weird shit.
• 21:44
  And the songs add to that even more, just the sheer bizarreness.
• 21:49
  The equalizer finally tells what I wanted to tell these people since day one, to shut the fuck up.
• 21:56
  He goes to school, and he sees these little fucking asshole students.
• 22:00
  And the teacher's telling him about the dancing of the naked girls and shit.
• 22:04
  Oh, no, no, not yet. I don't think that's there yet. Yes.
• 22:09
  The phallic symbol. It's the phallic symbol she's talking about.
• 22:11
  He finally goes off. You're all a bunch of fucking liars. Just shut up and listen
• 22:14
  to what I have to say. Blah, blah.
• 22:17
  And here we go. The line that you must have had a hard-on for.
• 22:22
  The one line you probably went, yes.
• 22:27
  This is what this is about. This is it.
• 22:30
  So when the librarian tells him, he mentions somebody's dead.
• 22:34
  I don't give a fuck who it is at this point.
• 22:36
  And she goes, whoa, whoa, whoa. whoa, we don't use the word dead.
• 22:40
  We believe life goes on into the trees.
• 22:45
  There you are. Travers probably eating. Yes. Travers probably having a nitcher
• 22:50
  of a soda pop and having some popcorn going, yes, it's all about the tree.
• 22:59
  Fucking hell. It's in the tree. We talked about this.
• 23:03
  It's in the trees. And we've talked quite a few times about trees,
• 23:05
  for fuck's sake. Yes. And the only one who's done it well to me is the Guardian.
• 23:10
  Remember that one we did? At least the tree did something.
• 23:16
  Yes, I know. I was just thinking of that. I don't care about sucking babies
• 23:20
  in and shit. That's fine. Right?
• 23:25
  Oh, boy. Technically, the Guardian is, I mean, we discussed this on the podcast
• 23:30
  for the Guardian, and technically it could be considered folk horror as well.
• 23:33
  Yeah, the Guardian. I would say that.
• 23:35
  That Volcar, like I said, you have some good stuff out there,
• 23:38
  like I mentioned at the beginning of the podcast.
• 23:39
  This isn't one of them, but it's rare for me to get into this because it's just so fucking whack.
• 23:48
  It's wow, right? So after he fronts to school, he looks for his little walk and stops for a second.
• 23:55
  And as you do, you see a big-breasted woman breastfeeding a child holding an egg in her hand.
• 23:59
  That's that's standard practice that's standard practice i see that every day,
• 24:04
  yep yep that's the weirdness jesus yep
• 24:07
  well on summer's isle it is yeah or somewhere else sorry not somewhere's isle
• 24:11
  somewhere else you see that how he makes a cross on the grave yes yeah oh yeah
• 24:17
  yeah the the christianity thing yeah let's low touch actually the one through
• 24:22
  god as he says later on. Yeah.
• 24:26
  They're pretty much killing him for tomatoes. Or apples.
• 24:32
  They're killing him so they can have apples. Yes, 100%. That's exactly true. Yeah.
• 24:38
  Yeah. So they can have a more bountiful harvest because the harvest the year
• 24:42
  before was their worst on record.
• 24:44
  Yeah, so you kill somebody so you can get better apples. Gotcha. Yeah.
• 24:49
  Or do you like those apples? and then miss morrison mr equalizer and this this
• 24:56
  is where it really gets fucking just fucking fuck me and then they got the pharmacist
• 25:01
  which has a jar of foreskins as you do,
• 25:05
  snake skins brains hearts baby piglets you've got let's not forget who literally
• 25:11
  shoves a frog down a child's throat yeah i was just about to say it removes it what the though.
• 25:17
  Fuck, are you people watching that I... What are you guys saying here?
• 25:24
  Like I say, even Harry himself says, you people are stark, raving mad.
• 25:31
  It adds to the weirdness of it big time.
• 25:34
  And it really makes you... It really sells the fact that these people are this bonkers pagan cult.
• 25:42
  Then he goes on a little fucking... We have the music back on. Fuck me.
• 25:49
  I was like Jesus At least give us some Sabbath or something.
• 25:57
  Actually that music Will probably fit Yeah
• 26:00
  so he's doing the tour What about a Nightmare on Elm Street Rap song you know
• 26:05
  Are you ready for Lord Summer Isle I take that may as well You guys you know
• 26:12
  what That rap song we made fun of it the Nightmare on Elm Street But if it was
• 26:15
  in this you'd be like Like, oh,
• 26:17
  my God, I get it.
• 26:19
  I get it. No, you don't.
• 26:23
  People are trying to see something that's not there. I disagree.
• 26:27
  This guy is a one-hit wonder.
• 26:29
  Never made a film again. Well, he did actually make a sequel to this,
• 26:33
  The Wicker Train, which wasn't very good. It's terrible.
• 26:35
  But that was like 40 years later.
• 26:38
  Yeah, it was like 2012 or 2011 or something. So that doesn't.
• 26:43
  Yeah, so this is where he sees the children, naked children,
• 26:48
  by the way, dancing around.
• 26:50
  Is that Stonehenge? What the fuck is Stonehenge doing here?
• 26:54
  Well, here, on a side note, see the sort of, would you not agree that the,
• 26:59
  what do you call it, the actual island itself is stunningly beautiful?
• 27:05
  You know, just, you know, the nature of it and stuff. I think they picked the
• 27:08
  perfect sort of setting, you know, to film it.
• 27:11
  Okay so i'm not here for a geography lesson well
• 27:14
  you should be you know because i'm going somewhere i'll give you
• 27:17
  one later so he does so we finally get to the castle we're gonna finally see
• 27:23
  dracula you know yes in his cape wow and what a horrible wig well it's sort
• 27:31
  of it was the 70s man you know i don't see it i don't see the 70s thing again
• 27:36
  you did that for dead zone.
• 27:41
  Yeah this is where he finally says that this
• 27:44
  is disgraceful you got children out there dancing naked and you're trying
• 27:47
  to get them pregnant and he's like oh yeah i'm the
• 27:50
  lord and then then there's more
• 27:53
  fucking singing yes there's really no
• 27:55
  dialogue here well well a lot of the
• 27:58
  dialogue is actually in song you know or else
• 28:01
  it's harry basically like basically telling
• 28:04
  people off and shouting and some calling them crazy and stuff
• 28:07
  but you know christopher lee here then as lord
• 28:10
  summarized he then explains how it was actually his
• 28:13
  great grandfather father who like back in the 1800s actually came to the island
• 28:18
  and started up the cult essentially okay so he decides he's gonna leave and
• 28:25
  yes dracula goes oh man you're gonna miss the mayday celebration and he's like
• 28:32
  Like, I don't give a fuck.
• 28:33
  I don't care. You're a bunch of lunatics.
• 28:37
  And this is where we get the whole willow. Yeah. Trying to urge him to have
• 28:43
  some yum yum time. Entice him. So.
• 28:46
  Yes. And he's really well played by Edward Rupert, actually.
• 28:51
  You know. I'm not giving a pat.
• 28:53
  I'm trying to find something here. Think. Let me think. Yeah. I'll say this.
• 28:59
  All the actors involved had balls. to do this movie.
• 29:05
  I'll give him credit for willing to participate.
• 29:12
  Edward Rupert I think is superb in it, I think he totally steals the show,
• 29:16
  I know and that's my point as bad as this film is Christopher Lee breaks his
• 29:21
  A game and Edward Woodward breaks his A game,
• 29:25
  Britt Eklund is just there for come on we know why, she's dubbed as well actually, is she?
• 29:31
  Any dialogue that Willow says is not actually her saying it.
• 29:35
  It's dubbed. Yeah, because she's...
• 29:37
  Where's she from? She's Scandinavian. Scandinavian. Oh, and Ingrid's the sweetest actress.
• 29:44
  Yeah, but she's using her real voice. Yeah, you can tell. You can hear the accent. Yes.
• 29:49
  Yes. No, and listen, everyone... How do I say?
• 29:52
  Everyone in this film is committed, even though how fucking batshit crazy it is. They're committed.
• 29:59
  No, kind of like Hereditary. Yes. Hereditary, you had Tony Collette's best performance
• 30:04
  of all time is in Hereditary. She should have gotten nominated for an Oscar.
• 30:08
  But that ending is so shit that it just destroyed it.
• 30:13
  But the acting was there.
• 30:16
  And the acting's there. Edward Woodward's a great actor. We all know that.
• 30:20
  Yeah. And we all know how much we like Christopher Lee. Yeah.
• 30:24
  So I applaud them. I do applaud them.
• 30:27
  And to piggyback on the scenery.
• 30:31
  That can't be accomplished without a good cinematographer, so they obviously
• 30:34
  hired the right man for that.
• 30:36
  Yes. All right, let's go back to tearing it apart now. No, I'm not tearing it apart. You are.
• 30:43
  So he decides he's done because he thinks the child is going to be sacrificed at this point.
• 30:48
  So he thinks the child is the sacrifice and not him.
• 30:52
  By the way, he hasn't a clue about their plans for him. Yeah,
• 30:56
  of course. At this point. Yeah.
• 30:58
  He's kind of stupid. I mean, he sabotages his plane. I would have taken a boat
• 31:03
  in two seconds to get out of there.
• 31:06
  He's not just stupid, he's also arrogant. Yeah.
• 31:11
  Did you find a scene really creepy where they've hijacked his plane and you
• 31:15
  see them peeking over the wall at him?
• 31:17
  In the fucking stupid masks? I thought that was stupid.
• 31:20
  Now, if this was done, not for laughs, because this was done for laughs, right?
• 31:25
  No, it wasn't. Oh, no. This is played dead straight, this entire film. It is.
• 31:30
  No, no. No, no, no, no, no. This is played dead straight from start to finish.
• 31:36
  This isn't a comedy. I'm serious. Oh, fuck. Of course it is.
• 31:41
  I am not taking a pick on the piss. No. I thought the whole thing was a comedy.
• 31:44
  And then the very end, they turn it up and kind of make it disturbing when he gets burned. So.
• 31:50
  No, no. Well, it does. It's certainly not a comedy, but it does sort of lure
• 31:54
  you into this sort of weird,
• 31:57
  bizarre world world where you think they're just like sort of they're a bit
• 32:02
  crazy but then it takes a real dark edge with you know the finale.
• 32:08
  With a burn them alive basically,
• 32:11
  You know, it's actually a really good sort of, you know, twist where you find
• 32:15
  out that, well, you see the girl, you know, up at the caves and stuff,
• 32:17
  and she basically, she's in on it with them.
• 32:20
  You said something, I can't remember what podcast it was, but once you know
• 32:25
  the twist, does this movie have any replay value?
• 32:28
  How many times have you seen this film?
• 32:31
  Oh, I would say a lot. It's, you're talking double figures, like,
• 32:35
  I don't know exactly, but it still has an extreme power, especially the finale.
• 32:41
  For me. It's a completely anti-Hollywood finale. You know, there's no rescue,
• 32:46
  there's no, it's just, it's quite shocking.
• 32:48
  Why are you saying anti-Hollywood? What is with you with anti-Hollywood?
• 32:54
  If it had to be a Hollywood film. No, no, I know why.
• 32:57
  Yes, I'm not talking about all Hollywood films, but generally,
• 33:00
  there was no sort of helicopters there to save the day and rescue them, you know.
• 33:05
  There was no happy ending. There's plenty of dark, dark, disturbing, that.
• 33:09
  Midnight Cowboy, one of the most depressing films of all time,
• 33:11
  came out wrong at the same time. I know that.
• 33:14
  I know that, but I'm just saying in general terms there's no Disney ending where
• 33:19
  it basically he gets rescued.
• 33:21
  Yeah, because that never happens in English films. I gotcha.
• 33:25
  Well, it's extremely bleak and harrowing and shocking. It's not.
• 33:30
  Because you've already taken me out. It is to me. Okay, so you got the parade, right?
• 33:34
  And he's dressed up as a gesture, whatever the fuck he is.
• 33:37
  Yeah that's where it becomes he becomes the clown the
• 33:40
  joker yes and you have a share there now
• 33:43
  he's now shared the lord is
• 33:46
  now shared yes and there's i'm with family babe i got you babe or something
• 33:52
  but again we got a musical and we got the fake beheading and then we got you
• 33:58
  know it just and then he figures out it's a trap just to get him on those clips yeah,
• 34:04
  It's his Admiral Ackbar moment. It's a trap. You know, this is where the film
• 34:09
  gets a pass for me, and this is it.
• 34:12
  Otherwise, it's terrible, is the character didn't break character.
• 34:18
  He stuck to his guns. He didn't beg for, please save me. I'll join your cult,
• 34:23
  like most of us probably would do. He didn't. Yeah.
• 34:28
  Yeah, this sounds great, guys.
• 34:30
  Let me go to the tree and dance around it. I'm up for that. You want me to have
• 34:34
  sex with Willow? You want me to have sex with Brett Eklund? Oh, yeah.
• 34:37
  Actually, I would have failed that test.
• 34:41
  They'd be like, fuck, get him off the island, the horny bastard. Yeah.
• 34:46
  But I like his performance here, and I like how he does not give up.
• 34:52
  And he's burning alive. He's praying for himself.
• 34:55
  So I like he- Did you notice- What?
• 34:58
  Sorry, did you notice as well that at the very beginning, certainly in most cuts of this film,
• 35:03
  he is reading psalm 23 and
• 35:07
  then very ironically he's also when he's
• 35:10
  burning alive in the wicker man he also returns to psalm 23 and he's singing
• 35:14
  it basically or screaming it you know you know so i thought that was a very
• 35:19
  good touch there's a certain irony about that you know you got this moment where
• 35:23
  he's burning and he's you know praying to himself and into god and so forth yes,
• 35:29
  what a better way to ruin the whole scene by breaking it into a fucking song again.
• 35:36
  Again adds to the creepiness factor where they're all swinging their arms and dancing and singing,
• 35:41
  Christopher Lee's in a dress and they're all happy and
• 35:44
  it's a great sort of juxtapose where they're all
• 35:47
  happy and singing because they believe in their brainwashed
• 35:50
  crazy minds that they're going to be now having apples you
• 35:54
  know apples are on the menu you again i mean that place better have some good
• 35:58
  fucking apple pie right but yeah so they're sort of singing they're all happy
• 36:04
  and singing and dancing and waving their arms and and um meanwhile edward bootwork
• 36:09
  is being literally burnt alive i wish i was in there too with them,
• 36:15
  i'm not gonna get this over with yeah yeah i don't i don't i i honestly don't
• 36:21
  get it i I remember I texted you and I said, well, didn't I say something like, is this a...
• 36:25
  Yeah, is this a musical? Is this a comedy? I think we were like,
• 36:28
  yeah, yeah. I mean, you know what? You don't have to get, you don't have to
• 36:32
  like it. You know what I mean? That's okay.
• 36:33
  You know what I mean? You know, each to their own.
• 36:37
  But I'll go back to Edward Rupert. I did, like you say, I did like,
• 36:40
  and it's very in keeping with the character because he's so arrogant and quite
• 36:44
  pompous that he doesn't give into them, you know, even if it means being burnt alive.
• 36:50
  Yeah. Yeah. So there you go. Yep. I have nothing else to add.
• 36:55
  I got nothing. I just want to go home.
• 37:00
  I want to go watch Die Hard or something. Well, you know, to me,
• 37:04
  it's, you know, yeah, it's crazy, but that's all part of the effect of it.
• 37:09
  You know, the whole bizarreness and the surrealness and the craziness of this cult.
• 37:15
  To me, that makes it even more disturbing, especially whenever we get to the finale.
• 37:19
  Alley to me it is one of the greatest sort
• 37:22
  of horror films but also british films not for
• 37:26
  everyone i you know not everyone will like it
• 37:28
  you know and there's certainly sort of weird creepy elements
• 37:32
  that if it was the real world yes indeed certainly illegal
• 37:35
  and certainly totally you know unacceptable but that
• 37:39
  just adds to the sort of the sort of
• 37:42
  insanity of this cult and cults are are insane to
• 37:45
  be fair yeah let's go with that yeah
• 37:48
  okay gosh what's up next jesus i i almost want to put mine in there just to
• 37:54
  cleanse the palate to um to to to ensure for a brighter harvest on the next
• 38:03
  citizen frame like me well that's a nice apples,
• 38:07
  The next one up we're going to be doing is a little independent film,
• 38:11
  a revenge thriller, sort of, kind of.
• 38:13
  I can't remember it, but it does have Paddy Constantine in it,
• 38:16
  who I really like, and it's going to be Dead Man's Shoes.
• 38:19
  So I think we'll get back to – I don't think there's any trees in this one, so it might be okay.
• 38:26
  Well, it's very much a pretty sort of grim sort of – yeah.
• 38:31
  There's no cults. There's no trees, you know, sadly.
• 38:35
  All right. So there you go. Well, that'd be the next one, and then I'll pepper
• 38:40
  one in to put a smile on people's faces and just enjoy listening to this rather than being depressed.
• 38:47
  All right, guys. The new issue of Phantasm Gloria is out now.
• 38:51
  It's available on Amazon worldwide and Forbidden Planet locally here in Belfast
• 38:55
  and among other stores within the US.
• 38:59
  Yep. Our Hail Razor special. Hail Razor special. Give us a shout if you want us.
• 39:04
  Whatever. whatever if you thought you love the wicker man or if you have my
• 39:07
  back on the wicker man but yeah a lot of people like this piece of crap so good
• 39:12
  on you to each their own to each their own,
• 39:16
  yeah reach out to us at citizen freight want to score a podcast on instagram
• 39:19
  and of course on facebook we're going to end this one because this is easter
• 39:24
  and oh check this out people you probably listened to the last podcast the nightmare
• 39:30
  on elm street remake we did that's right we've We've upgraded the equipment. Oh, yes.
• 39:36
  Hard cooler way. That's right. It is a new editing thing or something that helps
• 39:45
  me edit and makes everything crisper and clearer. So you're welcome.
• 39:49
  We did that for you.
• 39:52
  All right. We're wrapping this one up. Have a good Easter. Take care of yourself.