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No Kids, No Apologies: Wendi McClendon-Covey on Owning Her Choice To Live Child-free · I Choose Me with Jennie Garth

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: You're listening to I Choose Me with Jenny Girl. Welcome
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: back to I Choose Me. Wendy McClendon-Covey is as real
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: as they come. We're picking up right where we left
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: off with so much more to dig into. Here we go.
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: This is a huge accomplishment. You've been married for 30 years.
• 0:24
  Speaker 2: 30 years. Yeah.
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: That's... Wow. Can we just... I need to... Anybody else
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: in this room?
• 0:31
  Speaker 2: Nope. Okay.
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: That was a round of applause for your 30-year marriage.
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: Three decades.
• 0:37
  Speaker 2: Three decades.
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: You just had another anniversary. How have you done that?
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: How have you intentionally chosen your marriage for three decades?
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: And how have you navigated the inevitable highs and lows? Yeah.
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: I'm sure that there's a lot of answers for that
• 0:56
  Speaker 1: question because I know. Marriages are difficult sometimes.
• 1:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah. Well, with our marriage, I got to say,
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: it's him. I am a nightmare, and I know that.
• 1:11
  Speaker 2: But he is such an easy person to live with.
• 1:17
  Speaker 2: He is an easy person to live with. He's a
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: great person to come home to. They just don't make
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: him any better than him. I don't know. I, whenever
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: I see people and they're like always on vacation or
• 1:33
  Speaker 2: always like posting the good stuff, I think, well, that's easy.
• 1:40
  Speaker 2: That part's easy. Who's going to sit with you in
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: a hospital room? Who's going to be with you when,
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: you know, someone in your family is dying. It's the
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: ugly stuff that tests you. So like with Greg, I
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: can have fun with him sitting in three hours of
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: traffic on the 405. I know I'll have a good time.
• 2:04
  Speaker 2: I can't say that about going to Paris with anyone else.
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: You know what I mean? Yeah. He's just mine.
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: He gets you.
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: He's my juicy, yummy husband. And I know I am
• 2:19
  Speaker 2: not an easy person to live with. I know that. Why?
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: Tell me why.
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: Because I'm emotional. So? Yeah, it was not a bad
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: thing necessarily. I suffer from depression. I've been medicated for
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: years for that. And for him, that's hard for him
• 2:40
  Speaker 2: to navigate because his family just wasn't like that. You know,
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: they're all very stoic Swedish people. So that's hard for him.
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: He just doesn't, he didn't understand for a long time, like,
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: how can you be depressed when there's nothing wrong?
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: Well, yeah, that's the thing. That's my brain chemistry. I'm
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: really sorry. Yeah. Yeah. You know, um, but I am,
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: I am a big cheerleader for him. Like when he
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: does something amazing, I tell everybody I'm fair. I fight fair.
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: Although we don't fight. We argue. We argue sometimes because
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: who doesn't? But I'm fair about this thing. And I've
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: gone a lot.
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: Key to success right there.
• 3:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah. But he, you know, he used to work two
• 3:41
  Speaker 2: jobs to put me through the groundlings. He would be
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: there rehearsing with me. He'd go to every show. He'd
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: bring people. He would let me cut my wigs on him.
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: Run lines with me. Like he was so supportive and
• 3:57
  Speaker 2: he's the only one that thought I could do it.
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: Like no one else in my life thought I would
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: get anywhere in this business. So he can have whatever
• 4:08
  Speaker 2: he wants. He's, he's a house husband now and he
• 4:13
  Speaker 2: can do whatever he wants because he supported me. So
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: I will support him.
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: I love that.
• 4:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: I think having a house husband is, Sounds really good.
• 4:24
  Speaker 2: It's pretty cool.
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: Because then they just, you know, there's all the pressures
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: off of them. And I don't know. Sounds nice.
• 4:34
  Speaker 2: I'm not sure why. You need someone holding down the fort. Yeah,
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: you do. You're the one out there all the time
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: working these long hours. You need someone to keep the
• 4:44
  Speaker 2: house going. I don't know.
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: Well, I know that it hasn't been easy with his health. Yeah.
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: He was diagnosed with Parkinson's in 2015, for those who
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: don't know. Can you tell me about that journey or
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: what are some of the choices that you've had to
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: make to live with that and continue flourishing in your marriage,
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: in your own personal relationships with yourselves?
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that was a tough one because the diagnosis was
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: so shocking. I mean, he was in his early 40s.
• 5:21
  Speaker 2: When he got that diagnosis and the doctor he was
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: seeing in the beginning basically told him, well, gosh, in
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: a year you could be in a wheelchair. We don't know.
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: So just take these pills and we'll see you. We'll
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: see you later. And that is not helpful in any way.
• 5:41
  Speaker 2: That's a conveyor belt response. So me, I don't take
• 5:45
  Speaker 2: things like that lying down. Like you can't just No, no, no,
• 5:50
  Speaker 2: you're not doctoring well right now. So let's go find
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: someone else. Luckily, Adam Goldberg, who was the creator of
• 5:59
  Speaker 2: the Goldbergs, his brother is a neurosurgeon and he got
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: on the phone with us and gave us some other
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: things to look into, such as get to a teaching hospital.
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: For anybody out there with a Parkinson's diagnosis, I want
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: you to listen to this because it really helped us.
• 6:18
  Speaker 2: get to a teaching hospital and get to a movement
• 6:22
  Speaker 2: specialist because Parkinson's shows up differently for everybody. My dad
• 6:27
  Speaker 2: also has it. Really? You really can't tell with him.
• 6:31
  Speaker 2: With Greg, it was obvious. And after a while, the
• 6:35
  Speaker 2: meds stopped working. So we found a doctor and a
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: movement specialist that recommended him having a brain surgery where
• 6:43
  Speaker 2: they put in a device and, uh, So he's got
• 6:48
  Speaker 2: like a port in his chest with a battery pack.
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: And this thing stimulates a part of the brain that
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: keeps him from needing as much medication because after a while,
• 6:59
  Speaker 2: the medication stops working. Wow. This is a long haul thing.
• 7:04
  Speaker 2: So a lot of people think it's experimental. It's not.
• 7:09
  Speaker 2: And insurance should cover it. So that's incredible. We weren't
• 7:14
  Speaker 2: being told that by this doctor. But as you know,
• 7:18
  Speaker 2: as a woman and as a mom, like, oh, no, no, no, no.
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: Don't give me this bad news and give me no
• 7:25
  Speaker 2: follow up. No, we're going to hit this hard. We're
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: going to get on the Internet. We're going to do
• 7:28
  Speaker 2: our research. I'll fly to Switzerland. We'll do whatever. We'll
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: cash out. I will spend so much money on this.
• 7:35
  Speaker 2: We're not going down without a fight. So he had
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: that surgery back in 2022, and it has been a
• 7:44
  Speaker 2: game changer. Yeah. along with physical therapy, along with watching
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: his diet, like trying to eliminate any toxic burdens. I
• 7:54
  Speaker 2: try to get him in the sauna to sweat out things.
• 7:57
  Speaker 2: Of course he won't do it, but I did buy
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: a sauna. But like, he's got to eat a certain way.
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: He's got to carry this, the batteries for his device around.
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: I mean, I hear beeping all the time. Oh, Greg's recharging,
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: you know, And he has to do it, but he
• 8:16
  Speaker 2: has to get a good night's sleep. He has to
• 8:18
  Speaker 2: watch his health. I mean, even if he gets a
• 8:19
  Speaker 2: little cold, it's a nightmare. You know, just it affects everything.
• 8:26
  Speaker 2: So that was another reason why it was like, no,
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: you don't work anymore. Right. Yeah.
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: I think that is such great information. I hope that
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: that helps somebody listening out there because, I mean, you do.
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: You're just told what to do and then... you want
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: to trust the doctors. Hello. They went to med school.
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: They should know something.
• 8:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: But you know, you got to push the envelope. You've
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: got to find your own right answers.
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: Yeah. And, and get to those teaching hospitals because that's
• 8:58
  Speaker 2: where they're really going to take an interest. Okay. So
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: many people are being diagnosed with Parkinson's. So, you know,
• 9:05
  Speaker 2: whether it's your condo complex was using Roundup to kill
• 9:10
  Speaker 2: weeds for years and years and years. Or, you know,
• 9:13
  Speaker 2: there's just all kinds of contributing factors and you have
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: to exhaust all the resources for your life predicament. And
• 9:25
  Speaker 2: Greg is always happy to talk to anybody that's thinking
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: about having this done. And he has, he's coached some
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: people through it and it's, it's been really cool that
• 9:34
  Speaker 2: he's able to, help people in this way, you know,
• 9:37
  Speaker 2: and turn a negative into a positive. But yeah, I
• 9:40
  Speaker 2: can't say that that was fun. It was one of
• 9:43
  Speaker 2: those things where it's like, damn it. No, it's you
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: and me. And we're going to fight this. Yeah. We
• 9:49
  Speaker 2: are going to fight it. So.
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: Well, God, you say you're so lucky to have him.
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: He's so lucky to have you.
• 9:55
  Speaker 2: So lucky. Yeah.
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: Okay. I want to know, because you were talking about
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: your depression, your emotion, full behavior. I too have both
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: of those things all my life. Yeah. And I want
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: to know, is there one thing that's like a life
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: challenge that that you've either overcome in the past or
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: that you're still working out? Something that's like followed you
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: around for years. You know, I know you're 56, but
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: do you find yourself still dealing with some old habit
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: or some old way of thinking that's keeping you stuck?
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: Or how did you get past it?
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I have this fear or this, I guess you
• 10:44
  Speaker 2: might call it a tick of being misunderstood. of people
• 10:48
  Speaker 2: not knowing exactly what I mean or exactly what I'm about.
• 10:54
  Speaker 2: And I need to get over that because I shouldn't
• 10:57
  Speaker 2: have to explain certain things. And over explaining doesn't make you,
• 11:03
  Speaker 2: doesn't make someone understand you better. Right. If someone's committed
• 11:07
  Speaker 2: to misunderstanding you, it doesn't matter what you say. So
• 11:12
  Speaker 2: I am trying still to like hold boundaries about certain
• 11:18
  Speaker 2: things and be unapologetic about it.
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: Well, you said it's a tick. What do you mean?
• 11:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah. It makes me feel like I'm itching from the
• 11:27
  Speaker 2: inside of my skin to think, oh, someone didn't understand
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: what I meant when I said X, Y, and Z.
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: Well- Where do you think that comes from?
• 11:38
  Speaker 2: I remember feeling that way as a child about- about
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: certain things. Like, no, that's not what I said. Don't
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: twist my words or whatever. But like, why did I
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: feel that way?
• 11:51
  Speaker 1: Were you raised in a house where you were heard
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: and seen?
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: I was raised in a house where you really had
• 12:00
  Speaker 2: to fight for attention because, you know, and I don't
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: want to bad mouth anyone. You know, my parents had
• 12:07
  Speaker 2: kind of a tumultuous marriage. They're still married. And they
• 12:11
  Speaker 2: were both working and they were both at their wits
• 12:14
  Speaker 2: end all the time. So, you know.
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: They were doing their best.
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: They were doing their best. And, you know, we wanted
• 12:23
  Speaker 2: for nothing. But there were times when it's like, you're
• 12:25
  Speaker 2: not hearing me. You're not understanding what I'm saying. And
• 12:29
  Speaker 2: that is hard for a kid. But as an adult,
• 12:33
  Speaker 2: that has carried into my life. And I do recognize
• 12:36
  Speaker 2: that it's wrong and doesn't serve me.
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: It doesn't serve you.
• 12:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah. So I am still trying to work that out.
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: And it's getting better.
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: Do you just like tell yourself, hey, kid, cut it out?
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: Hey, kid.
• 12:54
  Speaker 2: A lot of talking to myself. You probably do it too. Like, hey,
• 12:57
  Speaker 2: come on now.
• 12:59
  Speaker 1: Everything's okay.
• 13:00
  Speaker 2: Everything's fine. Nothing's wrong. Don't make this into something.
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: I'm always saying, I don't want to blow anybody's life
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: up right now.
• 13:09
  Speaker 2: Not today.
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: Just let's have a good day.
• 13:13
  Speaker 2: Let's have a good day, right.
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: Oh, my God. Well, you said that you need the boundaries.
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: I'm curious, when you need to draw a hard line
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: in the sand or set a boundary, are you direct or...
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: And serious? Or do you use comedy kind of as
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: like a shield or even a weapon?
• 13:34
  Speaker 2: Yes, I have done that. I have done that. But
• 13:38
  Speaker 2: it's better to, as I've learned, to just say things
• 13:41
  Speaker 2: in plain language. Like, no, that doesn't work for me.
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: I can't make that work. But I can make this work.
• 13:49
  Speaker 2: Or I can't make this work next time. We'll do it.
• 13:53
  Speaker 2: But for instance, I make plans for every weekend. By
• 13:57
  Speaker 2: the end of the week, I am so dead dog tired.
• 14:00
  Speaker 2: I cannot kick myself up off the ground. So I
• 14:03
  Speaker 2: cancel a lot. And my good friends understand. You know?
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 14:09
  Speaker 2: Like I cannot, sometimes I cannot physically do more than
• 14:12
  Speaker 2: I've already done in the week. Oh, I get it.
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: You know, I just have to lay around. Yep. No makeup.
• 14:20
  Speaker 2: Mm hmm.
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: And.
• 14:23
  Speaker 2: Of course, my lucky husband has to look at me
• 14:25
  Speaker 2: like that. But he gets it too. Obviously, we've made
• 14:30
  Speaker 2: it work for 30 years. But yeah, I got to
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: hold on to those boundaries. Right.
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: You've also spoken openly about something that a lot of
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: women struggle with. I think you know how the world
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: tells us that we're women. We're supposed to have kids.
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: And you've decided that you don't want kids.
• 14:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: What was the moment that you fully owned that decision?
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: And also, how do you handle other people's opinions about it,
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: unsolicited opinions?
• 15:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah, the unsolicited opinions, I don't really care about, but
• 15:06
  Speaker 2: I do find it funny when those women also claim
• 15:10
  Speaker 2: to be feminists. And I've known since I was a
• 15:16
  Speaker 2: kid that I wasn't going to be a mom. I've never, ever,
• 15:22
  Speaker 2: ever had that urge. And I see people who like,
• 15:26
  Speaker 2: oh my God, we're going to do IVF. And if
• 15:28
  Speaker 2: that doesn't work, we're going to do this. And if
• 15:29
  Speaker 2: that doesn't work, we're going to do this. Okay, well,
• 15:32
  Speaker 2: I hope you get what you want. You want it
• 15:34
  Speaker 2: really bad. I don't. I never felt like, hey, if
• 15:42
  Speaker 2: this doesn't work, I'm going to go to the mat.
• 15:45
  Speaker 2: I'm going to make it happen. I never felt like
• 15:48
  Speaker 2: putting that much energy into it. And I see people
• 15:53
  Speaker 2: that have a bunch of kids and then they're like, oh,
• 15:58
  Speaker 2: you know, like, yeah, all these activities. But what did
• 16:02
  Speaker 2: you think it was going to be? You wanted it.
• 16:05
  Speaker 2: You talked about it for so long. And now it
• 16:07
  Speaker 2: seems like you don't like your kids. I don't know.
• 16:11
  Speaker 2: I do love kids. I always thought, well, maybe I'll
• 16:14
  Speaker 2: be a fun aunt. And I have been able to
• 16:16
  Speaker 2: be that for some of my friends. But yeah, I
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: knew early on I didn't want it.
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: Again, you just have a sense of yourself.
• 16:25
  Speaker 2: I have a sense of myself. Yeah. I'm too lazy.
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: And I'm too immature. Sure.
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: Oh, my God. You're reminding me of my best friend, Adele.
• 16:34
  Speaker 1: It's so good, though, that you know yourself. Like, why
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: are you going to chase something that you didn't want
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: to begin with just because the world says you should?
• 16:43
  Speaker 2: Right. Yeah, that's not fair to a kid either. No.
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: You know? No. But for everybody that wants to go
• 16:51
  Speaker 2: down that road, I support you.
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: Go get it.
• 16:54
  Speaker 2: Get it.
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: Yep.
• 16:56
  Speaker 2: And love it. Love every minute of it.
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: Or get it and hate it.
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: Just shut up about it.
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: Because you wanted this.
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah. Keep that quiet. Keep that quiet. Definitely.
• 17:17
  Speaker 1: Okay. So you said in order to recharge your battery,
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: you have to just go check out, lay down, take
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: your makeup off, be in your comfy clothes. I love
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: that visual. Is that your number one thing to take
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: care of yourself when the noise around you is just
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: too much?
• 17:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah. And I love, you know what? I love going
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: on hikes as much as I don't like being in
• 17:41
  Speaker 2: the sun. I do like being in nature with a
• 17:44
  Speaker 2: hat on so I can see the critters. Like I
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: love trees. I love plants. I love nature. I love butterflies,
• 17:52
  Speaker 2: you know, like wherever I can go and just have
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: a nice little nature bath and listen to a podcast
• 17:59
  Speaker 2: or something or my favorite music. Like that's my my
• 18:03
  Speaker 2: little vacation that I can take a couple of hours
• 18:06
  Speaker 2: a week. And I used to roller skate a lot.
• 18:10
  Speaker 2: And I still love it, but I just haven't had
• 18:12
  Speaker 2: a chance to do it in a while. Where do
• 18:14
  Speaker 2: you do this? Down in Long Beach, there's a place
• 18:19
  Speaker 2: called El Dorado Park and they've got these bike trails
• 18:22
  Speaker 2: and you can skate on them too, especially midweek. And
• 18:26
  Speaker 2: it's just the greatest. Oh, I love it so much.
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: You need to get back on your roller skates, lady.
• 18:32
  Speaker 2: I do. I do.
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: I love that idea. I have roller skates because I
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: love roller skating so much, but I never ever roller skate.
• 18:42
  Speaker 2: Oh, you've got to. It just feels like, I don't know,
• 18:46
  Speaker 2: like my inner child loves it. Yeah.
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: I love that for her.
• 18:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: Okay. So you know yourself so well. You were born
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: Wendy with a Y.
• 18:59
  Speaker 2: Mm-hmm.
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: Now you're Wendy with an I.
• 19:01
  Speaker 2: What happened?
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: How'd that happen? I'm Jenny with an I-E.
• 19:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: So I got a lot of issues with different spellings.
• 19:09
  Speaker 2: Were you born Jenny with an I-E? Is that on
• 19:11
  Speaker 2: your birth certificate? Okay.
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: So my mom, I guess, picked how to spell it. Okay.
• 19:18
  Speaker 2: So Wendy with an I came about because I worked
• 19:24
  Speaker 2: at a place where there were two other Wendy's. Ah.
• 19:27
  Speaker 2: And we had to differentiate ourselves. So I just took
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: that spelling and kept it.
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: Wendy with an I.
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: Wendy with an I. Yeah.
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: Is Wendy with an I different than Wendy with a Y?
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: Like personality wise? No, I'd say they're very similar. They are. Okay.
• 19:48
  Speaker 2: I answer to both. But yeah, I just kept it and,
• 19:52
  Speaker 2: you know, and now it's on all my documents.
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: So when you were, well, at your current age, what
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: does choosing yourself mean to you today? And how is
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: it different now? than say, you know, in your 20s,
• 20:13
  Speaker 1: when we didn't really have a concept of what it
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: meant to take care of ourselves or choose ourselves or,
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: you know, any of the above?
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: Well, I remember in my 20s feeling like I've got to,
• 20:30
  Speaker 2: if I do such and such, then this will follow.
• 20:33
  Speaker 2: If I do a favor for this person, then this
• 20:35
  Speaker 2: will follow. And I spent a lot of time being
• 20:40
  Speaker 2: outside of myself and doing things that I thought were
• 20:45
  Speaker 2: going to either get me friends or get me work
• 20:48
  Speaker 2: or just, you know, lead to something else. And now
• 20:52
  Speaker 2: I know none of that is true. You have to
• 20:55
  Speaker 2: take care of yourself first and don't do things that
• 21:02
  Speaker 2: you don't want to do. If you can avoid it.
• 21:04
  Speaker 2: Like if I used to feel like, Oh, I've got
• 21:07
  Speaker 2: to go to every party. No, you don't. Parties are exhausting.
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: Oh, thank God. You don't have to go to every party.
• 21:13
  Speaker 1: I thought there was something really wrong with me because
• 21:17
  Speaker 1: I hate like parties, like socialization on that level with
• 21:22
  Speaker 1: a bunch of people you don't know. Everyone's talking at once.
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: It's like the pressure of looking around and being looked.
• 21:29
  Speaker 1: It's just a lot. I never liked that.
• 21:32
  Speaker 2: Well, do you feel also like you take on everybody's energy?
• 21:36
  Speaker 2: And then at the end of the night, you feel like, okay,
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: now I got to scrub all these people off of me. Oh, yeah. Yeah.
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: And I mean, yeah.
• 21:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 21:47
  Speaker 1: It's hard to stay connected with yourself when you're in
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: that environment a lot. And I don't know. There's people
• 21:53
  Speaker 1: that do it constantly. And I don't know how they function,
• 21:58
  Speaker 1: how they survive. Are they going to change later in life?
• 22:01
  Speaker 1: I don't know. But I've always kind of been this way.
• 22:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: And I.
• 22:06
  Speaker 2: I have very little small talk left.
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: Oh my God. I think we're the same person. Wendy
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: McClendon Covey. I just love you so much.
• 22:16
  Speaker 2: Dang it. Yeah.
• 22:18
  Speaker 1: Like I don't, I don't like small talk.
• 22:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Like let's sit down and really have a discussion.
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: I can do that. I love that. I'm a dinner
• 22:28
  Speaker 2: party animal. I love that. But, um, the, the surface
• 22:34
  Speaker 2: level stuff I don't really care about. And like, I,
• 22:39
  Speaker 2: I'm a, I'm a dork. Like I'll sit and play
• 22:41
  Speaker 2: Monopoly with you for hours. Let's do that. You're having
• 22:45
  Speaker 2: a puppy party. I will show up. Okay. But I
• 22:50
  Speaker 2: just don't feel in, at this point in my life,
• 22:54
  Speaker 2: like if I don't want to do something, it's okay.
• 22:58
  Speaker 2: What's going to happen? Yeah. You know, it's okay.
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: It's okay.
• 23:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah. You don't have to be present at every freaking thing.
• 23:08
  Speaker 2: It's exhausting. It's boring. You don't have to.
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: And you'd rather be at home.
• 23:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I would rather be at home staring into space
• 23:18
  Speaker 2: with a bucket of chicken.
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: A hundred percent. Just you and a bucket of chicken.
• 23:24
  Speaker 2: Exactly.
• 23:24
  Speaker 1: No TV, nothing necessary. I love that.
• 23:27
  Speaker 2: Love that. Okay.
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: As we round this up, I cannot wait for season
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: three of St. Dennis Medical. Everybody should get really excited
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: because that's coming November 2nd.
• 23:35
  Speaker 2: Yes. Thank you.
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: And I just really want to tell you thank you
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: for spending time with us and, you know, leaving us
• 23:41
  Speaker 1: with your insights and your wisdoms. And I love that
• 23:45
  Speaker 1: we can have chats like this where we share our commonalities.
• 23:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Well, thanks for having me, Jenny. It means the
• 23:52
  Speaker 2: world to me.
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: I'm so glad.
• 23:54
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 23:55
  Speaker 1: Before I let you go, Wendy McClendon Covey. What was
• 23:58
  Speaker 1: your last I choose me moment?
• 24:01
  Speaker 2: My last I choose me moment. I said no to
• 24:07
  Speaker 2: a job because I just didn't see what was in
• 24:11
  Speaker 2: it for me. So I thought, you know, good enough. Let's,
• 24:17
  Speaker 2: let's just end this right here. There's nothing in it
• 24:19
  Speaker 2: for me. The money is fine, but I don't want
• 24:24
  Speaker 2: to be away from home. This just doesn't light me
• 24:26
  Speaker 2: up in any way. I'm going to say no.
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: I love that.
• 24:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah.
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: Well, you are a special lady. So I'm very happy
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: for all of your success.
• 24:37
  Speaker 2: Thank you so much, Jenny.
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: Until our paths cross in real life. I don't know
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: how that's going to happen because I don't leave my
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: house very often, but maybe someday I'll hook you.
• 24:49
  Speaker 2: We'll go skating or something.
• 24:51
  Speaker 1: We'll hug it out on our roller skates. We'll love it.
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: Thank you, Wendy.
• 24:56
  Speaker 2: All right. Thank you so much. Take care.
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: Bye. Bye.