Latest / The Multiverse Collective / Final Hope E15: I LOVE DINOSAURS, GODDAMNIT

Transcript

Final Hope E15: I LOVE DINOSAURS, GODDAMNIT · The Multiverse Collective

0:00
Hey, hey, I just wanted to pop in here before this episode
0:03
really gets going. I wanted to talk about a couple
0:06
things that we got going on. The 1st is on New Year's Day.
0:10
This year we're doing our, I mean, I, we did it New Year's
0:14
like last year too. So I guess now it's our biannual
0:18
live stream, unlike last year where it's going to be on
0:21
Twitch. I think this year I'm going to
0:22
try and set it up to do on our YouTube channel since we have
0:26
one. Just makes more sense to do it
0:28
there as opposed to my own personal Twitch, whatever.
0:32
And people can generally watch things a little bit easier on
0:34
YouTube if you can't make it to that.
0:37
Oh, I guess I should say what we're doing.
0:39
So we're going to be doing the the 2500 play Q&A during the
0:45
live stream. By that point we'll be well past
0:49
2500, I assume. We are screaming towards it.
0:53
And honestly, we can't thank everybody who listens enough.
0:56
Like it's absolutely insane that this time last year we're doing
0:59
1000 and now we're at 2500. So like, jeez, you guys are
1:04
crazy. But that'll be on New Year's
1:09
Day. And if we have time as well with
1:13
that, we'll also be playing like a little like Christmas and hell
1:17
thing we talked about in a Discord.
1:19
We'll see TBD. And if if you can't make it to
1:24
that, don't worry about it. We're going to post it all.
1:27
It'll live on the YouTube channel.
1:29
And we will also post the uncut version, both the audio and
1:33
visual to the the main feed. Everybody will be able to watch
1:37
it. Don't worry about it.
1:38
But if you can't make it to it and you have a question, feel
1:42
free to submit your questions. If you want to submit your
1:44
questions before then pop over to our discord, which honestly
1:48
you should just pop over to our discord anyways cuz it's a lot
1:51
of fun in there. And we have a link to a Google
1:55
sheet form that you can fill out.
1:58
Any questions you got about the show, what we do, just us in
2:01
general. Like please, we love hearing
2:03
what people have to say. On that note, we have our
2:08
Patreon, which is now pretty well up and running with the
2:12
video feed. If you listen to the show on
2:16
Spotify and you go to the top, there's like a little banner
2:19
that says go to like the premium feed or something like that.
2:22
If you click on that, you can actually go to it's, it's the
2:25
same main feed. But if you're a Patreon
2:29
subscriber and you are, you have your Patreon and your Spotify
2:34
linked, you will also get access to all the uncut episodes.
2:38
And on Spotify, you'll also get videos.
2:42
If you use your Patreon link wherever else, you'll get the
2:45
same mixed feed, but you just won't get the videos because
2:48
that's just kind of a Spotify thing.
2:52
And like I said before, come drifts on the Discord, you know,
2:54
it's, it's fun. We want people in there and we
2:57
love talking to people and we have, you know, channels for
3:00
everything. So yeah, enjoy this episode.
3:05
It's a it's a bit of a whiplash and I'm not going to say any
3:07
more about that. Fun, scary, sexy, scary or
3:12
scary? Scary?
3:14
All three. We'll find out when we go.
3:19
Cool, I will preemptively have a semi.
3:23
Sick. It's how I want everybody to
3:26
start a game when I'm running. What quarter child?
3:30
Half Britain ready to be disappointed?
3:36
That's the title of my sex tape, anyway.
3:41
I think we just found the perfect cold open for this
3:43
episode. Well the good news is Spencer
3:53
and Max got out of that Coliseum.
3:55
The better news is Max has taken us all the chilies.
3:59
Oh, but on the way we oh boy. Well, I we met some Deuce and he
4:05
wanted us to get like, Picard's flute and like a flash drive or
4:10
something. And Spencer apparently decided
4:14
that we're going to do it. But I mean, I guess on better
4:17
news, hey, we're getting to Chili's.
4:48
OK, well where we last left off, everyone had just been in a
4:54
meeting involuntarily with Asmodeus as they were entering
5:01
this legally, legally distinct space Chili's.
5:05
And as that interaction ends, you are all teleported back to
5:10
this reception area of this, again, legally, very legally
5:15
distinct space. Chili's How?
5:17
How are you all feeling after you've just made a deal with a
5:21
random man? I fucking hated that.
5:24
I still don't know what's going on and I'm hungry as shit.
5:26
Very not good. I I think Murphy's still kind of
5:31
confused because we're not entirely sure.
5:32
Like we got very vague instructions like he he told he
5:39
wants us to do this thing but straight up didn't tell us how
5:43
or where to go or anything like that.
5:45
I mean he. Gave you a map of five planets,
5:47
he gave you a list of five planets, and then best of luck.
5:52
Eve, right? Yeah.
5:54
So maybe you might get lucky, you might not get lucky.
6:00
You know, you're the Power Rangers.
6:01
You fucking just do what you have to do.
6:03
Remind me again, what were the things you wanted us to find?
6:07
He wanted you to find a hard drive and a flu.
6:10
Was that it? I thought there was 1.
6:11
Of those things, No, no, just the two things.
6:13
Yeah, because we already found out the gun.
6:16
Yeah. You did already find him the gun
6:18
that then you witnessed to get stolen.
6:21
Yeah. During your meeting.
6:23
That's not our problem. Definitely not your problem.
6:26
No, I'm not getting paid enough of this shit.
6:31
I'm not getting paid anything. You got paid.
6:34
True. Yeah, it's honestly pretty
6:36
fucked up. And as the three of you has just
6:39
sort of stood there bewildered, a three foot tall cricket
6:45
humanoid comes over and was like, he's like, what sort of
6:50
guy is that? Like to sit down or you're?
6:52
Just going to have an. Existential crisis in my lobby.
6:55
No, no, no. We'll, we'll sit.
6:57
We'll sit. We'll we'll sit.
6:58
Sorry, Sir, Ma'am. I I, I, I'm confused.
7:05
Sorry kids these days. Fall on me and he and he walks
7:11
you through to a booth. You don't get just like a table.
7:14
You get a booth and puts down free fucking plastic menu like
7:19
the shit laminated plastic menu as you get.
7:22
Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
7:23
Yeah, very familiar. So familiar.
7:26
And you look on the wall next to you and there's just like a
7:29
picture of a man with like, a cow, not even like a human man,
7:34
just like some sort of alien species of man with a cowboy hat
7:39
and a chili pepper. And it just says chilies in
7:42
italic font underneath. Nice, I'm imagining it's just
7:46
like Times New Roman. Like not even a stylized.
7:53
Murphy is unfazed. This is average chilies affair.
7:56
Spencer's isn't paying attention.
7:57
She's reading the menu. Max is hardly looking to see if
8:01
they have like, weird space fajitas.
8:05
Yeah, they have let me think. I should have planned out a menu
8:10
really, but we bought weeks. To give us a fully cohesive
8:15
menu. I know I was expecting like a
8:19
like a good six page front back like a Chili's menu.
8:25
The more that I think of it, the more that I feel like modern
8:28
Chili's. I feel like they would be down
8:31
with this. I.
8:35
Don't know, we feel like more of a Wendy's joint, but.
8:39
I could go for a joint right now.
8:42
I could go for a joint and a Chili's.
8:45
Yeah, Spencer's deciding that she'd like to have a fat of
8:49
chili. The largest amount of chili that
8:51
they'll bring to one person she would like to have.
8:54
OK, damn the coffee. That's.
8:57
Going to be a nightmare in about an hour.
9:00
Yeah. Yeah, exactly.
9:02
You see on the menu there's just a size that says Goliath.
9:07
Easy money. And then Spencer slaps the menu
9:10
back down that table. So what are you guys going to
9:12
get? The Blooming Onion.
9:15
I don't know this. This tuple dipper looks pretty
9:18
interesting. I'm not going to lie.
9:20
Dip, Yeah, it's got dips. You've you've got dips like it's
9:22
got like 2 regular dips like you you'd know of.
9:25
And it's just like ranch. And I'm going to guacamole.
9:30
Dial. That's not what the triple
9:31
Dipper is. I'm I'm English.
9:34
It isn't space. It's a space triple dipper.
9:40
And you said triple dip, not 777 legs.
9:44
Yeah. Because there's probably more
9:45
options in when you have a whole galaxy's worth of planets to to
9:49
source your dips from. Hey man, I'm pulling.
9:54
I need to get my planet plan around.
9:55
Give me a second. I think you need to go to a
9:59
Chili's. I think it don't.
10:01
You don't. No, you really don't.
10:04
Somewhere my wife took psychic damage and she doesn't know why.
10:10
Hi, Jenny. It's OK, she's not going to
10:15
listen to this. I know.
10:25
You see Lumen Chowder as a dip. That is genuinely frightening as
10:32
an opener. Hey, man, I think Matt, Matt
10:38
believe that stops and it's just like, all right, maybe I'll just
10:43
stick with the space fajitas. No.
10:47
OK, the space fajitas. You have free options.
10:50
You have Fraxian sand strider wings like like not like, but
10:55
like boneless wings on you on it.
10:57
You have Zolonian ice fruit. There's like the vegetarian
11:03
option. Then you have the the fish
11:06
option, which is like an Aqua Sigma 7B special that they have
11:12
at the moment. And it's just like loads of
11:15
different weird fish that you've never even heard of before
11:19
because they don't exist on the planet Earth.
11:21
And for some reason, for it being the year 3198, Earth is
11:25
just really ignorant of foreign culture.
11:28
Yeah, that tracks great. I guess I'll be having the weird
11:32
fish fajitas. Max also slaps his menu down.
11:42
Oh, fuck. You know, so you just want to
11:43
bloom an onion. Yeah.
11:45
And about 15 minutes goes by and then all your food comes out.
11:51
But you didn't tell anybody in order.
11:53
Ah. OK, Max knows better than to
11:57
question things. Are our neural links on?
12:02
Murphy you just get this blooming onion, but it's like 3
12:04
ties the size of a regular onion Max.
12:08
Your fee is just look like fajitas that you get on earth
12:11
just with weird fish in them and Spencer you see like 5 people
12:19
carrying this ginormous and I mean it's like 6 foot tall by 5
12:25
foot wide tub of chili. Lunch baby, can I get some some
12:34
some some cheese for that and like some sour cream or
12:37
something Now I'm. Going to think about to do that
12:39
voice again. That one was just like a fucking
12:41
full on throw out yeah, I'll bring it over in a second.
12:46
This is a different server. It's not the cricket man.
12:49
This is this is a six boob. Did you just?
12:58
Say 6 hoop theropod. Yeah.
13:02
All right, yeah, that's fine. Spencer has clearly feelings
13:06
about it and she's just knocking to say.
13:08
Anyway, it's clearly plastic surgery.
13:10
Boobs as well. Fuck good.
13:14
Oh my God. Wow.
13:16
I don't know why I do this to myself.
13:18
I don't know why. Are the boobs on the neck or are
13:21
they like like where are they situated?
13:24
I'm just single file actually just like straight down from
13:31
under chin all the way to like the underbelly area.
13:37
OK, that tracks. Are are the nipples covered at
13:43
least or is it just like? Out.
13:47
Is it out? Are they just out there that I
13:53
have too many follow up questions?
13:57
This. That might be the title of the
13:59
episode. Good work.
14:02
Oh, you're killing me. This is what happens when you
14:07
add more than like 2. Boobs hey you can't it's got it
14:12
wrong every culture to have more less than or equal to the amount
14:18
of boobs that we have 3 or. Less it's weird because
14:21
theropods are not mammalian, so like, these are clearly just
14:25
aesthetic teats. They're not.
14:30
Functional and no function all form.
14:32
It's like getting a. Said the very clearly.
14:35
Plastic surgery. Well, I just I don't understand.
14:39
And the and the nipples are covered, but just the nipples.
14:43
The rest of the teeth is out. Great.
14:47
At least there's some sense of decency in the in the space
14:50
chilies. Sorry, the legally distinct
14:53
space chilies. And how is the never mind?
14:56
I know that I needed to provide. None of my questions are going.
14:59
To think Chili's is going to be on board with this anymore.
15:01
None of my. Questions.
15:02
I I just want to know your questions now.
15:04
I just want to know how a fucking tiny armed theropod with
15:08
six tits going from chin to chest is carrying my gigantic
15:14
fat of chili. I never said that.
15:17
There are like 5 people. Yeah, it is.
15:19
Yeah, it's the. Theropod, I mean one of them or
15:21
was it just like escorting it? It's.
15:25
Just like escorting. How is it taking the orders?
15:30
It's just good at its job. It's got metals.
15:39
Who do you all have? People that we work with who
15:41
shouldn't be able to do the job, and somehow they do it.
15:46
I'm looking at you, Jake. Yes.
15:49
So this spheropod comes back over with a bowl of cheese.
15:53
And was it sour cream dip you wanted?
15:55
Sorry, you made me laugh that much.
15:56
Like my brain turned off. Yeah, just just regular sour
16:00
cream, Yeah. Yeah, it's just regular sour
16:03
cream. Yeah, thank you so much.
16:05
This is great. And Spencer is like doing
16:07
everything she can to not make eye contact.
16:11
Or. Or look at the boobs.
16:15
What this? This weird fish fajita?
16:21
Better than one would think. I'm like, not hating it, Would
16:28
you? Like I feel like I should tell
16:38
you guys like what what I learned.
16:40
Yeah, yeah. I mean.
16:41
Because we haven't really had time to do that yet.
16:43
Yeah, maybe we should talk about that instead of our interesting
16:50
food choices. So apparently I'm the son of a
16:56
God. Specifically, Heimdahl is my dad
17:01
apparently. Spencer is like just shoveling
17:04
food into her mouth and like, nodding enthusiastic like like.
17:10
Which explains all the weird shit that happened back on Mount
17:14
Olympus, but I don't know how to control it.
17:17
But I feel like at some point we're going to have to go to
17:21
Asgard to see people. All right, well.
17:25
Cool, chill, normal, Already in space?
17:29
Why not? I feel like that's more normal
17:32
than some of the places we've been.
17:33
Let's just chalk it up on the list.
17:36
Yeah. Well, we'll, we'll hit some
17:37
other places on the way there, but that's I, I need to go there
17:41
if at some point I have questions.
17:43
Yeah. Is there anything else you want
17:45
to talk about or are you just all going to sit there in
17:47
silence? All this six titted fair upon is
17:49
just walking around serving. Yeah, I think that has created
17:53
some seriously uncomfortable silence on the part of Spencer.
17:57
Max is going to. Max is going to walk up.
18:00
He's going to get up from the table and he's going to go find
18:04
the our our nice theropod server and just kind of whisper near
18:12
where Max would assume its ears to be.
18:15
Hey, so our friend with the blue mint onion, it's his birthday
18:18
today. I don't want to be like that
18:22
guy, but like, can you guys, can you guys do something like bring
18:24
out a piece of cake or like, I don't know, come sing happy
18:28
birthday or you know something? You got it.
18:32
And she just like walks away all.
18:36
Right, great. Thank you.
18:38
And Max walks down. He sits back down and he takes
18:43
another bite of fajita before stopping and realizing, Oh dear
18:47
God, what? What could a birthday
18:51
celebration, an illegally distinct space chilies look
18:54
like? And I think Max.
18:56
Theropod. Max just shoves it down and
18:59
keeps eating his weird fish. Spencer's like laser focused on
19:05
the table directly in front of her.
19:07
She won't even look up because the way that the teats on the
19:09
theropod are swinging back and forth like the primordial sack
19:12
on a cat as it walks around, the gentle sway back and forth as
19:19
they just like, hang out there. I hate you for doing this to me.
19:24
And now I can't do anything other than picture this.
19:30
I love dinosaurs, goddammit. Oh.
19:38
New title idea. I love dinosaurs, goddamnit.
19:51
That my one moment of bullshit was going to be this.
19:53
Funny, I wouldn't. It was about 10-15 minutes goes
20:01
by and you just see guys. We've been recording for like 20
20:07
minutes. Seven of those minutes, seven of
20:12
those minutes was talking beforehand, so we're all.
20:15
Right. No, that's factored in.
20:17
It's 27 minutes. Yeah, we, you see, just a
20:24
regular human guy and like a what I'm assuming is a regular
20:28
Chili's unit. I don't know what the fuck it
20:29
looks like. I don't care, Sumi.
20:31
It's. Just like a black shirt with a
20:32
pepper on. It chili pepper.
20:36
Legally distinct chili pepper. Yeah, it's the face in the
20:40
other. Way it's a blue chili.
20:41
Pepper. It's a blue chili.
20:42
It's an upside down blue chili pepper.
20:45
Yeah, and this guy is just very depressed walking.
20:47
You just see he's got. Like a tiny sombrero.
20:50
He's got just like a piece of cake with a sparkler in it, puts
20:54
it in front of the he goes happy birthday.
20:57
We can't see sing the song because we'll get sued and then
20:59
walks away. Thank you.
21:03
Max just like, looks up and he's like, what?
21:05
No the the song's public domain. Oh, Max, it's fine.
21:11
Just leave it. Just leave it.
21:12
I'll take the cake. It's fine.
21:14
He's the 9th slice of red velvet.
21:17
Max Should we sing? No Max.
21:22
Max No. And Spencer, like, elbows him
21:23
really hard. Yeah.
21:25
Should we sing? Yeah, we probably.
21:27
Should. Happy birthday to.
21:30
You. Happy birthday.
21:34
To you. Happy.
21:40
Birthday, dear Murphy, is that your full name?
21:44
Why by the way? Murphy so.
21:47
Happy. I don't know man, fuck no one
21:54
sing me happy birthday before shit I was like really?
21:58
Good. So slow man.
22:00
This is not. The type of criticism.
22:01
Happy birthday Murphy, eat your. Fucking cake.
22:07
Spencer just starts like trade shoveling dorm album fuck.
22:26
Holy shit that was the funniest thing I've.
22:29
Ever seen in my life? She wasn't.
22:32
She wasn't doing that on accident.
22:35
That was not like lag. That was on purpose.
22:38
I can see. Oh my God, I commit to the
22:45
bitch. Oh my dear.
22:53
God, I feel like you need a break.
22:55
Oh, I have a headache now. All right, that's the episode,
22:59
guys. Join us.
23:00
Just leave me. Join us in four weeks to see
23:03
Matt pay the bill. Well, Spencer asks a lot of
23:08
questions about tip and taxes. Holy shit.
23:20
I'm going to go ahead and unmark my conditions for that.
23:23
I'm no longer afraid or anger. No, no, I am.
23:28
I am still afraid after that. How much do you think those
23:35
cost? Oh, you know what?
23:46
I didn't ask if they take earth dollars.
23:50
Max, are you going to have to answer some riddles to pay this
23:52
bill? God, I hope not.
23:54
We may be here forever. Guys, we're so bad at riddles.
24:00
Asgard may have to wait. I don't want to be a dishwasher.
24:04
We'll have to give up our careers as as Rangers and be bar
24:07
backs at. Least we'll make money, right?
24:10
They'll pay us, right? Now, is this like a debt?
24:14
Well, I don't think if we stayed we would still be paying off the
24:17
debt. I don't think it's like an
24:18
indentured servitude situation here.
24:20
It's legally distinct. Space jellies.
24:22
You ask, ask, ask our server. Ask our.
24:26
Murphy grabs A napkin and writes on a note and writes a note and
24:28
passes to Max and goes. It just says do we need to dine
24:34
a dash? Max walks up from the table
24:40
again and finds the theropod server.
24:45
I'm I'm sorry to keep bothering you and keep getting up.
24:48
You guys take you guys take earth dollars, right?
24:52
Yeah. OK, cool.
24:55
All right, great. Do you want the bill?
24:59
Yeah. OK, I'll be with you in a
25:01
minute, sugar. You sound like my grandma.
25:06
Hey Murph, how much do you think my chili was?
25:09
It's a lot of chili, right? I feel like I feel almost bad
25:11
for making Max like pay for this because we're not making any
25:14
money. He.
25:15
He offered. He offered to pay.
25:16
He did. He offered to pay for it.
25:19
Guys, Spencer, it's just, it's just chili for like a week.
25:21
Don't worry about it. Just bring it with it.
25:23
It's fine, It's it's fine. I I'm going to put it on.
25:26
Swordon's tab Oh. That's a good.
25:29
Idea. Wait, you have a card that you
25:30
can put it on? Yeah, he gave me a corporate
25:33
card. What the fuck?
25:34
He didn't give me a corporate card, Murphy.
25:36
Do you think Zordon doesn't trust me?
25:39
I feel like that's probably for the best to be honest.
25:47
It's fine. I'll, I'll write the expense.
25:48
I'll, I'll write the expense report when we when we get on,
25:52
when we get back on board. That sounds like a really sad
25:54
use of your time, Max. It is, but somebody's got to do
25:58
it. The six titted ferropod waitress
26:02
comes over with the bill and just puts it on the table.
26:06
Don't say anything, just walks away.
26:08
Oh well, OK, I need you to describe how this goes for me
26:10
because again, tiny arm. So is she like squatting down
26:13
and like draping her tits on the table?
26:15
She's got strip, she's got stripper heels on like 12 inch
26:19
stripper. Heels so she's just like
26:20
dropping the cheque like physically from like a high
26:23
place and I just like. She has like, the little
26:25
dinosaur, like, yeah. Why?
26:28
Why isn't she wearing non slips? Yeah, why it seems.
26:32
Really dangerous. Super dangerous, especially this
26:34
is like you. Can't get non slip, yeah.
26:35
Non slip stripper heels. Have you not heard of them
26:38
before? Oh my God, I'm going to have an
26:40
aneurysm this. Is like this isn't how I planned
26:48
for this to go. This is like something from a
26:51
nightmare that I've had before. I told you our best episodes are
26:56
the ones we have no plan. For that's very true.
27:01
Is it sexy horror yet? Right.
27:04
I don't know. This is body.
27:07
Is this the body horror you warned us about?
27:10
It is. For me, I think whatever else it
27:13
is that he has actually planned, this is gonna be worse for me.
27:21
At least I know what to do to make right scared from now until
27:25
forever. Just add tits to anything.
27:28
Just. How do I how much is this, how
27:30
much is this bill and how do I pay?
27:32
I want to get out of here. It has.
27:34
Let's see, where are we? What?
27:39
Yeah. Where are we?
27:40
We're at Space Chili. We're at Space Chili's.
27:44
LDSC so it takes pesos. It says I'm just going to it has
27:51
some weird symbol you've never seen before and then like 43
27:56
next to it, but then it's converted into U.S. dollars and
28:00
it's like 743 U.S. dollars. I'm not sure it was the. 7.
28:07
Hundred $700. All right, well, I guess Max, I
28:15
don't know, puts down the card, signs his name and all, right.
28:18
We go before anything bad happened.
28:20
Great. Spencer.
28:23
'S pulling the Jelly behind her as we leave.
28:25
It's just like believing. Does it come with a cart like?
28:28
Grapes on the dollar? Yeah, it's just on the pump
28:31
truck. You also.
28:37
Tank her full of chili. You also see as you've signed
28:40
and you put your card down that they double charged with the
28:43
Murphy's birthday cake. You know what?
28:46
I don't care. I'm not paying for it.
28:48
I don't care. OK.
28:53
Is that everything we're doing in space chilies?
28:55
How much did you chip, you tip, you serve?
28:57
Legally distinct paint space chilies.
29:01
Well, again, I'm not paying for it 35%.
29:04
They do it. Oh, they have tipping culture in
29:05
space. Hold on, I can figure that one
29:09
out. OK, so you leave with this
29:22
ginormous tub of chili just trailing behind Spencer.
29:27
Yeah. Oh.
29:28
Hey Max, you can keep that in your sip jar.
29:30
Yeah, Max, this is perfect. It'll stay hot, Max.
29:36
Please don't put this in my soup thermos.
29:39
Max, can I please borrow your thermos?
29:42
No, no, you cannot. I don't.
29:46
Know why he's so Murph? I don't know why he's so fucking
29:49
defensive about this thermos thing.
29:52
He won't even let us try the soup.
29:53
I haven't even seen him leave the soup.
29:55
I know I he doesn't let it leave his bedroom.
29:58
I I guess he does bring it to the bathroom sometimes, but it's
30:01
like a really weird place to eat soup.
30:07
It reminds me of high school, OK.
30:10
That's a weirder thing to say, man.
30:11
Much weirder thing to say. So wasn't that like 50 years old
30:16
for you? Shit, I can't even believe that
30:19
you remember that. I'm 26 years.
30:23
Old I need a drink. Can I get my own thermos since
30:29
Max won't share his? If you wanted your own thermos,
30:33
you should have asked for it in The Cave of questionable
30:38
knowledge. Wait, Max, does Phoebe deliver
30:40
out here? Max, can you use your card to
30:45
buy me a thermos off of eBay? Sure.
30:48
Put it. Put it in the cart.
30:50
Thanks. I don't care anymore.
30:52
We're we're A-Team. We have thermoses together.
31:00
Oh, we should get them engraved. Max, do you want to get your
31:02
thermos engraved so that we can tell yours apart from mine?
31:05
Does Feebay do that? Actually, actually, yes, that's
31:10
very we. We can't be mixing up these
31:12
thermoses. The thing is, is you if you if
31:16
any of you were smart, you'd realise that Max is his very own
31:19
personal laser engraver. True.
31:23
Oh yeah, that's very. True, but I don't think we're
31:27
not very smart to go. No.
31:29
No, no. I'm fully ready to make Max pay
31:33
a fee pay for this. I cannot wait for when you have
31:36
to like, get both of the furnaces out so you can engrave
31:39
them. That's going to be a very odd
31:45
side episode that I'm going to have to do.
31:52
OK. Is there anything you do on the
31:53
purge before you set off? I forget we did we pick a
31:57
planet. Yeah, you, but you've not said
31:59
you told me which planet planet you go into.
32:01
You just like that's because I asked you to after we recorded
32:05
last time. Oh.
32:05
OK, it was after. I couldn't remember if it was
32:07
after. Or not, excuse me.
32:09
Where are we going guys? It was the the fish planet,
32:12
right? It.
32:13
Was the rig. Or is this the mushroom planet?
32:16
This is the Mushroom planet. This is the mushroom.
32:18
Planet. OK, OK.
32:20
So you have your little scroll thing.
32:25
Sorry, my brain's turned off from all that laughing.
32:28
It's just wiped me. Oh yeah, You have your little
32:33
scroll and Viridi was like the 4th planet on the scroll.
32:38
And I'm assuming you just as as the knowing leader Murph, I'm
32:42
assuming you just gone. We're going to go there.
32:44
Yep, I picked one from the list and we hit go.
32:47
Nice. Great.
32:57
The the flight probably takes about.
33:00
I don't know, 2:00-ish days to get to this planet.
33:07
And as you're looking down on this planet, you see like a
33:15
thick fog covering the whole planet.
33:17
But it's not like white fog. It's like a different hues of
33:22
purple and pink and red all mixed together in this sort of
33:25
swirling. Come on brain, think of the word
33:28
that I need to think of. Vortex.
33:30
Miasma. Either of those will do.
33:33
And it you see like little every now and again through the fog,
33:37
you see like little bioluminescent airwaves going
33:41
through, like little spores flying through this thick miasma
33:46
of fog. Are you going to just go
33:50
straight for a landing or? I I feel like we would probably
33:56
try and radio like for docking coordinates, see if there's any
34:01
like sentient life on this planet.
34:03
I'm. So happy that we have somebody
34:05
who understands how to do things back.
34:10
I'm like. I would have just landed and we
34:13
would have been in the middle of nowhere and it would have.
34:15
Been If I was in charge, I think we would have died a really long
34:18
time ago. I think if I was in charge, we
34:21
also would have died a long time ago.
34:23
I don't think we would have made it off the planet if you were in
34:26
charge, Max. Not to be negative, but yeah.
34:29
You're roughly right. I feel like we would still be
34:31
studying tax law or whatever it was they were trying to teach
34:33
us. Yeah, yeah, probably.
34:42
Right, so. Meanwhile, Murphy's just push,
34:45
pushing buttons, trying to hail somebody on the radio.
34:50
On on you get what you send your radio signal through and you
34:54
don't get any response back, but you just get like a coordinate
34:58
come up on your screen. What have we needed?
35:02
I guess so. I push the coordinate to go,
35:08
autopilot, go. Yeah.
35:10
And you and you land on this like hastily constructed metal
35:17
platform and you, you see like as you come out of the PERD, you
35:22
see like these mobile mushroom caps, they're about 3-3 or four
35:27
foot tall and they have like sort of glowing colours within
35:32
them. That makes sense.
35:33
Like the body changes the colour and stuff.
35:36
And like on the the bottom side of like the mushroom cap,
35:40
there's like tendrils like just flow down.
35:44
Like a sombrero. It it's hard to explain.
35:47
Yes, like a sombrero. There.
35:48
There you go. Oh my God.
35:50
Mushroom Sombrero. Sick.
35:53
One of these aliens come over to you and when you're looking at
35:59
it, it's it's glowing like a like a green and red hue and it
36:04
says hello. Welcome to our planet of Iridia.
36:09
How can we be of assistance to you today?
36:17
We're looking for a flute and something called a hard drive.
36:21
Do you happen to have either of them?
36:23
Hey, what's up? We're Power Rangers.
36:26
I think we should introduce ourselves first before we just
36:28
start going into that. Max and Spencer elbows have
36:32
really hurt. What's up?
36:35
My name's Spencer. Flies like 50 feet away.
36:37
She now goes into attempt to DAP up this mushroom.
36:41
She doesn't quite know the logistics, but she's going to
36:43
try. It it goes to DAP you up back,
36:49
but when you're like it's just got like really soft hands.
36:51
So you're like full on my yeah, yeah.
36:53
And it just like hasn't just bubbles away.
36:57
To clarify, these are bipedal mushrooms with caps.
37:00
Yes. So they have like a face, arms,
37:03
legs. Yes.
37:05
OK, OK. Are they tall?
37:08
About 3 or 4 foot. OK.
37:10
So they're very short. This is Murphy.
37:14
This is Max Nice to meet you all.
37:17
Spencer. Also don't now bows in a very
37:20
like culturally insensitive way. Nice.
37:24
Nice. Good job, Spencer.
37:25
Thank you. Yeah, well, one of us has to be
37:27
the cultural liaison here, and it's certainly not you or him.
37:31
Spencer points at Max, who's still like, dusting himself off.
37:34
Yeah, sounds about right. We can take you to the Great
37:39
Mycelium to see if there are any answers of which you seek there.
37:44
Yeah, sick. Thank you so much.
37:48
Please show us the way, dear Mushroom being.
37:53
Smith. You are very welcome and you
37:57
start this mushroom, this called my quorum just for you to know
38:05
and starts leading you through this maze of giant mushrooms and
38:12
different bio bioluminescent fauna that cover this whole
38:17
planet. Can I can I role assess the
38:21
situation? Yeah.
38:23
I don't trust these things. Mushrooms are kind of funky and
38:26
I don't I don't fully trust. Yeah, go for it, my friend.
38:31
You need to pull out my book. I've actually got a place.
38:33
Now I just need to see what I. It's superior.
38:40
Superior. Good, good.
38:41
I'm glad that's the stat. I have a book now.
38:45
I have a place for my book to go under my desk so I don't lose.
38:48
It that's a four. Oh hell yeah, you don't get to
38:51
ask any questions. Nope, I sure don't.
38:54
Murph is just more stressed about things.
38:58
Yeah, he'll, he'll, he'll stay quiet, but he's very much like
39:01
looking around, trying to figure out if there's danger.
39:06
I get you, I get you. Is anybody else doing anything
39:09
while you're on this? Walk No.
39:10
Spencer trusts this mushroom implicitly.
39:12
She has no sense of fear or self preservation here.
39:17
Beth. I don't know, I feel like on the
39:20
one hand Max is also like sussed out, but on the other hand he's
39:24
just like what the fuck else can we get into?
39:27
I There's just a sense of defeat over him as he trudges through
39:32
this mushroomy planet. As you walk in through, you come
39:38
past the sign, like a dilapidated sign that says Spore
39:43
Garden 9X. And as you walk in through, you
39:48
see loads of different, different strains.
39:52
We're going to call them strains instead of races, because why
39:56
not? Plants.
39:58
Yeah, of my kora. You see them growing other
40:02
mushrooms for structures or food or any other sort of thing, but
40:08
any basic civilisation would need to keep themselves going
40:13
and they're all, all of them flipping that green and red hue.
40:18
Every single one of them you walk past is.
40:21
This cannibalism guys. Is there such a thing among
40:26
fungus? I don't really know how it
40:27
works, I'm just a tourist, but this a little creepy.
40:33
Yeah, I. Yeah, Spencer will roll in a
40:37
sess just to see what's up with this.
40:40
Yeah, go for it. My superior is plus.
40:45
Two Oh yeah, Dirty 12 and I can get this book out.
40:53
You can ask any two of these questions.
40:57
I definitely want to know who here is the biggest threat or
41:00
what here is the biggest threat. OK.
41:04
I mean, beyond that, I don't think any of the other questions
41:07
are super pertinent for what Spencer cares about right now.
41:11
I don't necessarily think she would know to ask even a second
41:13
question, even with a 12. Can can you guys take your
41:17
headphones off for a second? Oh boy.
41:20
Oh I love this new. Thing that we're doing.
41:23
So do I. It's great.
41:34
On your assessment. You realise the whole planet,
41:38
everything on this planet is the biggest threat to you.
41:41
Nice. OK, cool cool, cool cool.
41:45
Spencer is like breathing really heavy through her nose and isn't
41:50
is trying to just like play it as cool as possible I guess.
41:54
Then follow up. Shit.
41:57
No, there's no follow up. There's not nothing I can.
41:59
Ask after that, No. Yeah.
42:02
Are we dead? Did we die?
42:03
Yeah, all of these died. That's the end of the campaign,
42:05
everybody. Thank you.
42:06
That's kind of what I think. Cool.
42:07
Mushrooms. Cool.
42:11
I know you just you just keep walking, keep walking through.
42:19
Yeah. Hey.
42:20
Got it. Spencer, you all right?
42:22
Yeah, you're. You're breathing pretty heavy
42:25
there. Don't worry about it.
42:27
I'm kind of worried about everything right now.
42:29
It's. Chill.
42:32
This this my my Cora turns its head 180° because this is
42:39
fungal, doesn't have vertebrae or anything like that.
42:43
No. Why would it?
42:44
Were we not you sapiens, everything is going to be OK.
42:49
And then slips back. Yeah, Murph's going to look at
42:52
Spencer and just like kind of point like at the morpher and be
42:55
like, should we kind of like. Spencer is eyes very wide but
43:04
like trying to make calm, soothing gestures at her
43:07
companions because she doesn't know how to handle this at all.
43:13
Can I Can I Pierce the mask? On Spencer no.
43:19
Of this. My kora.
43:23
We've not done one of those roles before.
43:24
I know, I know. We're looking at the roles.
43:27
Look at me like actually having the book and understanding what
43:30
I can do. It's wild when you have the
43:32
book. I know.
43:34
Yeah, roll plus Monday, my guy. All.
43:37
Right, that is a that is a 2. You cannot piss God.
43:43
Damn. It you can add, oh, you can also
43:46
add up a spot of potential if you already did, yeah.
43:49
Already did. Yeah, great.
43:53
Spencer's hand is hovering over her, more of her bracelet.
43:57
Don't worry about it, everything's going to be fine.
44:00
Everything. 'S going to be fine.
44:01
Do not like this. Yeah.
44:05
You after about another 15 minutes, 1520 minutes of
44:09
walking, you come up to this giant, I mean absolutely giant
44:15
mushroom and the mycora that's been guiding yours.
44:20
Welcome to the great man. Here is where you can learn
44:24
everything you need to know about the questions you've got.
44:27
And as you're walking, you see like these really thick, like
44:31
vines and fungal threads that are just all over the floor.
44:35
And I need all three of you, all three of you remember this.
44:40
It's a roll plus mundane. Shit, that's a -2 for me.
44:44
Yeah, that's a three. 11. That's an 8.
44:50
OK, Spencer, as soon as you step onto this mycelium, you your
44:55
whole body just freezes and your eyes roll back.
45:01
Oh. Max you get a couple feet in to
45:07
closer to the mycelium and then the same thing happens to you.
45:11
You freeze up, your eyes roll back.
45:14
And Murphy, you make it pretty much all the way to like to this
45:17
trick, but with what you're hearing around you, you still
45:20
think that Max and Spencer are walking next to you.
45:23
This visual hallucin like visual facades of them walking next to
45:28
you. And then the same thing happens
45:29
to you. You freeze up and your eyes roll
45:31
back. The baby don't say a word Mama's
45:42
gonna buy you a mockingbird And if that mockingbird don't sing,
45:56
Mama's gonna fly on hate Jo wings and if you.