Latest / Only Bombs! Comedy Podcast / ONLY BOMBS! 40 Lino Rodriguez | Mississippi To Mothership

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ONLY BOMBS! 40 Lino Rodriguez | Mississippi To Mothership · Only Bombs! Comedy Podcast

0:00
Right I hang out in my like a room all the time
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and just I get tired of video games And I go
0:08
across Comedy Central and I see those old 30
0:10
minute specials I just watch the fuck out of
0:13
them and I just over time I never thought I could
0:15
be a comedian because I'm from Mississippi. Yeah,
0:18
you know Seriously, what stars are in New York?
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They're in California. They're like Las Vegas.
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Yeah, it's not it's not a Mississippi thing.
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What brought you here comedy? Just comedy? Yeah,
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comedy. Starting a life out here in Austin. You
0:34
know, the classic, I got on Kill Tony thing.
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And then you're like, I want to pursue comedy
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in a bigger scene. Honestly, just constantly
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working on stuff that I find fun. I don't know,
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I'm not a sit -down -for -hours type of guy,
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but I have been a patch. You have to not take
0:48
yourself so seriously in life in general, especially
0:51
roast battles, because it's for all the love
0:54
of comedy. It's the game that we're playing,
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you know? Yeah. It's for the people. Like, you
0:59
have to really want to do this and love it enough
1:01
to, like, you know, take the punches, and the
1:04
failures, and, uh, whatever. Along with success,
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you just gotta keep rolling, I guess. If you
1:09
really want it. Welcome to Only Bombs, Lino.
1:19
Thank you, thank you. Welcome to the Thunderdome,
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fuckers. Welcome to the Thunderdome. Hell yeah.
1:26
Well, bro, how are you doing, man? How's everything
1:28
going? I'm chilling, dude. Not... good... Not
1:32
good. Not much good is what I was about to go
1:35
for. But you know what? It could be better, my
1:38
friend. Yeah? What's a normal day for you look
1:41
like? What is Lino doing, you know, by himself?
1:45
Get graphic. Get graphic? I'll get graphic. So
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I opened a bag of chips real slow. Ruffles, my
1:55
favorite. and I go to pull them out and I eat
1:58
them while I play video games on my bed. One
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chip at a time. One chip at a time. Every time
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I get killed, I eat a chip. Dude, I'm like a
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handful of chip guy. Yeah, yeah. Those are two
2:11
types of people for sure. The handful and the
2:14
one at a chip. The other guy has no time to waste.
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No. Full handfuls of chips. There's no time.
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The other guy's like, I'm going to enjoy this
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chip. Yeah, yeah. I'm going to take my time.
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That's kind of how I am. But then afterwards,
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I'm like, I really desperately need water. Oh,
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yeah. You know what I mean? Like, after I eat
2:29
chips, I'm like, oh, god, I feel like a fucking
2:30
snail that's had salt thrown on him. Speaking
2:33
of. Yeah, that's it. Hydrate people. Cheers,
2:35
buddy. Cheers. There we go. Oh, yes. What a smooth.
2:39
We got into this hella smooth. Guys, if you ever
2:41
seen your OBGYN, you got to. They're going to
2:46
be like, I know this great sketch artist. Well,
2:48
actually, he's not very good. Cool, just checking.
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But anyways. All right, all right, all right.
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Yeah, dude. So what does a typical day for Lino
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look like? So like weekday or weekend day? Because
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those are two different types of days. Yeah?
3:00
OK, well during the week, what you doing, man?
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I'm waking up in the morning. I'm going to auto
3:04
shop, usually a little hungover from the night
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before. I have a day job. I wrap cars with PPF.
3:10
You wrap cars? Mm -hmm. I just started. Yeah,
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yeah. I'm an apprentice, the oldest apprentice
3:15
you'll ever meet, probably. Nah, man. Nah. It's
3:18
probably me. But no, that's pretty cool, dude.
3:21
Like, how did you get into that? Well, my good
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buddy John, I was, so earlier this year I got
3:26
laid off from a pot farm, not a pot farm, a pot
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bus. I sold weed on a bus. You sold, oh, okay.
3:32
You sold weed on a bus. One of those head shop
3:34
on wheels things. Oh yeah, sure. Yeah, yeah.
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I worked at one of those and I got like soft
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fired from it. And then I was out of a job. Oh,
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that sucks. Yeah, yeah. When the laws changed,
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they went a little like, you know. Haywire, huh?
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He had a little skittish and then a lot of people
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lost their jobs And I was like, you know out
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of a job for a bit and then my buddy John is
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nice guy. He's a comic He works there. He's been
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working there for a while and he's like hey We
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need some help in the shop You seem smart enough
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to you know do stuff You seem smart enough to
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like act around for a while. Yeah. Yes, you see
4:10
what you can cover him some things. All right
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So they gave me a shot and brought me into the
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shop and I've been working there for a couple
4:17
of months now. It's been cool. Oh man, that's
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pretty badass. Have you done like, do you do
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like all sorts of like different like colors
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and stuff or is it like commercial and they do
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like just advertisements or? So it's sort of
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a range of things. We do whatever our boss tells
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us. It's mostly been colors lately though. Oh,
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okay. Like color PPF and we get a lot of stuff
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from a Tesla factory or like Rivian and stuff
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like that. Oh, dude. Then we have like random
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Side jobs, like I polished a Lexus a week ago,
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two weeks ago. Oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah, dude, I
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drive an 06 Pontiac Vibe, and I was like, dude,
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I've got to get that, like, wrapped in, like,
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purple. Do it. Oh, my God. Like, that would be
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fucking cool. Yeah. If you want vinyl, like,
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there's two different types, guys, in case you're
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wondering. There's, like, vinyl, and there's
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PPF. PPF is a little bit more expensive because
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it's paint protection. Oh. And then vinyl is
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just straight -up color that you wrap over your
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car. Like, that's, like, some of the fun videos
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you see on the internet. Yeah, I would just be
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like just literally wrap it. Don't even fucking
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worry about nothing Because it's such a piece
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of shit. It's like it's such a terrible car.
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It's like a zit on wheels, bro Yeah, covered
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in a little foil. Yeah, pretty much. Yeah, wrap
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that bitch. Yeah, we'll take it to dinner Yeah,
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you got to pull it back to get it to go, you
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know, yeah Peel the peel the ship back Yeah,
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there's a big like wind -up key and shit, you
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know, oh, that's awesome. I would actually love
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a car like that. Would you not? No, no, man.
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I hate starting it up right now. I'm like, ch
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-ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch
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-ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch
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-ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch
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-ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch
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-ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch
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-ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch
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-ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch
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-ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch
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-ch -ch -ch -ch -ch -ch - Like mine, it's just
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like, it's like, okay, I'm up. Fuck, dude. Good
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morning. Time to go. It's like, fuck, dude. And
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the whole time they were just complaining at
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you? Yeah. Oh, dude. Yeah. My car is moody as
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fuck, dude. Every now and again, the check engine
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light comes on. And then just like everybody
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else, I'm like, well, that's not getting fixed.
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And then I'll drive it around for like ever.
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And then all of a sudden out of nowhere, it'll
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just go off. Oh, really? I'm like, what the fuck
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is wrong? Like, why are you mad at me? Oh yeah,
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I have some stuff like that in my car too, like
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the cold went out, you know, in my car. The AC,
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it just went away for a while. I was like, fuck
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well, I'm just gonna be hot for a while. I've
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been burning my ass off, you know, Texas heat,
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and then all of a sudden it came back. I was
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like, were you mad at me? Yeah, were you mad
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at me? Why didn't you let me have the heat before?
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Why'd you change your mind, you know? You son
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of a bitch Yeah, so you just held it back for
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me for a while, huh? Yeah, you had a problem
6:54
We could have talked about it. I was on a gas
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for a week. Oh Give me the heat. Yeah, I mean
7:04
the cold fuck sketch that. Run it back, run it
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back. Right, right. Let's just do that one more
7:10
time real quick. Yeah. But yeah, man, like so,
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other than working, man, like, you know, do you
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have like any kind of hobbies or anything outside
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of comedy that you like to do? I like to write
7:20
music sometimes. No shit, what do you play? Yeah,
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I play guitar. Yeah, I play guitar and sing a
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little bit, have a little fun there. Oh, that's
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awesome, man. Yeah, that's something I do like
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to relax and like when I'm so stressed out about
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life in general, like late at night, no one's
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up. Oh, fuck yeah. grab the acoustic or something
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and just, like, fuck around for a bit, you know?
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That's great, dude. What kind of music do you
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play? I play, like, uh... I like fingerpicking
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a lot, but I play, like, alternative... I don't
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even know what to call it. It's, like, jazzy.
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I like Mac DeMarco a lot, you know? Mac DeMarco?
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Mac DeMarco. Oh. That's his brother. Matt DeMarco.
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No, Mac. Like, mac and cheese. And to think the
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headphones are on. Yeah, I know. I know. Alright,
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I slurred it. I'm from Mississippi. You're new.
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You're Louisiana, Mississippi We don't have to
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quite the education you guys do. Oh, dude. I'm
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gonna start this thing off with there's nothing
8:11
with cicadas then Cuz I what part of Mississippi
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are you from? I'm from South Mississippi Biloxi.
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Oh, okay Biloxi area. Yes, what's a what's a
8:23
high school called st. Martin? Oh, okay. Yeah.
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Yeah. Yeah. We used to go like vacation out in,
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like, Gulfport, Biloxi, and things like that,
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just to go to the casinos and shit. Exactly,
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yeah. You know? I worked at a Bubba Gump Shrimp
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Cump for a little bit. Nice. What was that like,
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dude? Well, it was a shell of a good time. There
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was a lot of shrimp. There was Cajun shrimp.
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There was Po Boy shrimp. There was fried shrimp.
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Oh, it was good. I was a dishwasher in a casino.
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Oh, nice. No. Nice, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, super
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nice. One of the most prestigious jobs you could
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have at the casino. Oh, yeah. Yeah, especially
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during lunch at a Cajun food restaurant in the
9:03
middle of a casino. Dude. Jesus, dude. Yeah,
9:05
they just throw frizz, like, they just toss their
9:07
shit at me like it was frisbee sometimes. It
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was crazy. Like, stuff would break. Fucking assholes,
9:12
man. Yeah, yeah, a bunch of moody, sassy -ass
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waiters like, here. Yeah, waiters, man. I'm pre
9:18
-Madonnas, bro. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They're
9:20
post -Madonnas. They've been Madonnas. Yeah,
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no, that's very damn true, man. Like, I used
9:25
to be a server, you know, but yeah, I just kind
9:29
of walk dishes every now and again if I needed
9:31
to, but it seemed fun. Yeah, also, waiters in
9:35
the future, I love you guys. I'm just joking
9:36
around, so don't, like, spit in my food or anything
9:39
like that. That would not be cool. I appreciate
9:41
you and I love you. Every waiter. Every one.
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Even if Hitler was a waiter, I'd be like, yeah.
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You served your time. That's a nice mustache,
9:52
sir. Yeah, yeah, thank you. Please don't spit
9:54
on my food. Yeah, he's like, of course I'm going
9:56
to spit on your food. This is going to be the
9:57
best food you've ever had. Look at that over
10:00
there. I'm not raising my hand, though. Yeah,
10:02
he burned my food. Yeah. It's like all Hitler
10:05
was doing was just asking a question. That's
10:06
all. Hey, guys. No, I'm just kidding. But yeah,
10:10
man. I hope so. Right. I hope so. He was asking
10:13
like why be serious. Why can't we all just get
10:15
along right and just lost in translation Bullshit,
10:18
but anyway So like so so you rap? Artists or
10:24
music artists, you know all that stuff like that,
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dude And then after like all that said and done
10:29
you go out and you just do comedy, huh? Mm -hmm
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Yeah, how many open mics you try to get like
10:33
a week? I try to get like when I have the time
10:35
to I try to get like most like the midnight mics
10:37
I can I like the late night stuff a lot. Yeah,
10:40
why is that? Don't know it just feels like you
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can like relax let loose Yeah, that's like when
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the I feel the least nervous on stage usually
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is like the late -night mics I I I forget there
10:52
that are even my early mics, you know, like seven
10:54
o 'clock eight o 'clock I forget about that because
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I just look forwards like the ten o 'clock the
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eleven o 'clock. Yeah. Yeah, those are pretty
11:00
good I think like growing up in like when I was
11:02
younger and in a comedy and stuff always like
11:04
emulated guys like Dave Attell Sure, you always
11:07
hear about them like closing out two in the morning,
11:09
three hours, I was like, I always wanted to be
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that guy, you know? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Even Insomniac
11:13
or David Tell. Yeah. That was his whole thing,
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was just living the nightlife. Nightlife, exactly.
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So that's sort of like, was like the mysterious
11:20
stuff that like I sort of flock to. Yeah. The
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fun stuff. Have you ever saw any like crazy things
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being out there at night? Oh, well, I work on
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Sixth Street, so I've seen some like, not so
11:31
stuffed. Yeah, there's a lot of shit out there.
11:33
I once saw this lady get. Freaking rocked by
11:36
a dude. They're trying to jump these these two.
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This is like six women. We're trying to jump
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these two guys Which is smart This is the smartest
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thing you can do. Yeah, if you're a group of
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women Anymore. Yeah, and the guys like mice me
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and you our size like six three like big like
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Yeah, and they're like jumping on I'm hitting
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them like this, you know Jesus and all of a sudden
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this woman came from like 15 yards away She's
12:02
just like, you know, it's like charged up and
12:03
like in a video game And you see the guy playing
12:12
his back foot and We're back and just launched
12:15
one of the heaviest hits I've ever seen son of
12:18
a bitch. Yeah, and like she's like in the cartoon.
12:20
She went like quit Just bounce straight bounce
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off the ground bounce back up and kept coming
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at him like a zombie. Yeah Yeah, the hardest
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hit of the hardest I've ever seen anybody ever
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take she just Dude, yeah, you can't you can't
12:36
do nothing. You know what I mean? Like watching
12:37
all that shit It's not like you could ever be
12:39
like, you know, hey stop what you're doing citizen.
12:41
Like you're just It's just so much. What are
12:43
we to do? What are you what are you to do? Yeah,
12:46
other crazy stuff has happened late night like
12:48
one One time I was working the door And we used
12:52
to call this lady that dwelled in the streets,
12:57
She -Hulk, because she was ripped as could be.
12:59
She was like this smaller black woman. She just
13:03
yacked. Yeah. She looks like a mini Mike Tyson,
13:06
like just rah, shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And one
13:11
time we had like a long line, because we had
13:12
a sort of big show, and she walked up to the
13:15
line, looked at everybody, just quiet as could
13:18
be. Then she squatted and started pissing. Just
13:24
started draining like a waterfall right in front
13:27
of the... Golly, dude. And 6th grade is so gross.
13:31
Everyone was just like, what you gonna do? Right.
13:35
Don't fall down, anybody. Yeah, nobody should...
13:38
Hey, basically, look out. There's some stuff
13:40
on the ground. Hey, don't walk in the piss. What
13:43
the fuck are you doing? Don't walk in the piss.
13:44
Oh, you're walking in the piss. Oh, what happened?
13:48
Yeah. Yeah, dude. No, around the corner. Broad
13:51
fucking daylight, too. I was just driving, and
13:53
all of a sudden, there is like, you just see
13:55
people walking on the sidewalk, and there's this
13:57
woman, and she like fucking just shits on the
14:00
sidewalk, right? Yeah. And I was just like, well,
14:02
that happened. OK, cool. And then, but the thing
14:05
that got me, dude, she was wearing a fucking
14:07
surgical mask. Wow, yeah. Oh, I guess for hygiene.
14:11
Yeah, she shits with precision She's out there
14:16
with a scalpel like let's go It was bad doctor
14:20
doctor doctor pass the TV. Yes pass it Pass it
14:25
a bidet doctor Pass the warm water, please. I
14:28
want to get a Bluetooth bidet. It's just that
14:31
way if anybody ever uses the restroom and just
14:32
be like Alright. I had the opposite thought with
14:37
that, it's like he plays music, you know? I don't
14:39
know, that'd be sick, like someone's taking a
14:42
shit and all of a sudden from under them I just
14:43
hear Thunderstruck start. There was a tin shit
14:46
in their life. TNT! Dynamite! It'd be fun to
14:52
do that to like an old like grandpa or grandmother
14:54
on the toilet and start playing like devil music.
14:57
That would be bad. They would literally die.
15:03
There's a lot of people who die on toilets. Really?
15:06
Yeah. Yeah. That's a piece of Elvis. Yeah, yeah.
15:10
Peanut butter, banana sandwich, just fried. Hell
15:14
yeah, dude. So you go out, you go out at night,
15:18
you like to do that and everything. So what's
15:21
your weekend like? Are you just trying to hit
15:24
more shows and stuff like that? Are you trying
15:26
to get booked? Yeah, I do go to a lot of shows.
15:29
I like to hang out at the Creek and the Cave
15:31
a lot. That's where I go to hang out a lot. Honestly,
15:34
if I don't have shows lately, not until the last
15:36
month or so, I was working. Oh, yeah. Yeah, most
15:39
weekends is every, you know, Friday, Saturday.
15:41
That was sort of the deal. So I didn't really
15:42
get to do that that much. And honestly, since
15:44
I haven't been doing that, I'm sort of partying
15:47
a little bit. Yeah. I've been just letting loose
15:49
and having some fun on the weekends and not.
15:51
like sleeping in and just enjoying it for a bit,
15:53
you know? I mean, it does make sense. Like to
15:55
just kind of like unwind and relax and things
15:58
like that. You need to get that every now and
15:59
again. You're right. I've spent maybe I've been
16:01
doing a little too much, but, you know, it's
16:04
easy to get into that. What's a typical night
16:07
of partying look like? Partying? Well, just meeting
16:10
up with friends and having some beers and then
16:12
not stopping until we've... Run out of beers,
16:15
probably. Not stopping because you're shitting
16:16
on the sidewalk. Yeah, don't stop till you get
16:19
enough, you know? And even then we might not
16:22
stop. We might just keep on going. Yeah, yeah.
16:24
I have a good friend. We go to her apartment
16:26
and like play games and watch movies all the
16:29
time and get drunk. That's a fun time, you know,
16:31
or I'll go to or I'll go down to the creek and
16:33
drink till they close. And, you know, I love
16:36
like I said, I love hanging out there. So I just
16:38
stay. Frazier's. Frazier's never been you never
16:42
been to Frazier's. No, what's that like? Oh my
16:44
god. It's uh, it's one of the best bars in town,
16:46
man Yeah, Frazier's let me write that down. So
16:49
it's DeMarco Frazier Mac DeMarco not Matt DeMarco.
16:53
That's his cousin No, Frazier's. Yeah, man. Frazier's
16:57
is the home of the long and low Yeah, I don't
17:00
think I've ever been there. Oh, you got you They
17:03
have a they have a placard. This is like the
17:04
number one cores spot cores banquet spot in the
17:07
country A Coors Banquet spot? Yes, a Coors Banquet
17:10
bar. What is that? They're just sponsored by
17:13
Coors. Oh, oh, okay, yeah. Yeah. It is sick.
17:20
You get a, so long and low, you get a six dollars
17:23
for a pitcher of beer and a shot of well whiskey.
17:27
And the pitcher's like ice, like in cartoons.
17:30
And you get to sit in there, you're at a bar,
17:31
you're like pirates. Like, argh, argh, yeah,
17:34
yeah, yeah. And da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da
17:35
-da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da
17:35
-da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da
17:36
-da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da
17:36
-da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da
17:37
-da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da
17:37
-da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da
17:37
-da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da -da
17:37
-da -da -da - well paid forward so music never
17:44
stops. Right. And when it does stop playing,
17:47
then it just does this weird thing, it's like,
17:49
I need more money, put more money in me to play
17:52
music. Oh, really? Yeah, it's a funny, I only
17:54
heard that happen like once or twice, but yeah,
17:56
it's really fucking. That's funny, dude. Yeah,
17:58
and they just play pool and talk shit and go
18:00
on the balconies. It's a good old time. Damn,
18:02
dude, that sounds like, that sounds like fun.
18:04
I haven't been like, I really kind of don't go
18:06
to bars much because I stopped drinking. Oh,
18:08
no, I didn't know that. Rest in peace, man. Oh,
18:11
yeah, yeah. It was difficult, but... I'm sorry,
18:14
I'm kidding. Oh, no, no, you're good. You're
18:16
good. I totally joke around with that. It was
18:18
like everybody around me drinks, but I don't
18:21
care because I get it. I get it. I totally get
18:24
it because I used to drink a lot. Yeah. How much
18:27
did you drink? Oh, dude. Basically, I would start
18:32
and just not have any control to stop. That's
18:34
sort of... I'm in a little bit of a situation
18:36
like that myself, so I can sort of relate. Yeah?
18:39
Yeah, yeah. So, like, when you wake up, do you
18:43
feel guilty or do you start drinking again? Both,
18:46
depending on the day. Like, Saturday, when I
18:50
woke up, I felt pretty guilty. I don't like those
18:52
nights where you wake up and you're like, oh,
18:53
shit, I'm home. Oh, man, this is the worst. You're
19:01
in the back of my fucking house. I passed out
19:05
at my friend's house the other day. My friend
19:07
Shannon's. I woke up on the couch. And I let
19:10
out a guttural scream. I was like, ah! I like
19:15
your guttural scream and how, like, not guttural
19:17
it is. No, I don't want to yell on this. I was
19:21
like, oh, where am I? Whoa, whoa, oh. And I grabbed
19:25
the couch. And I was like, oh, I'm on. You grabbed
19:28
the couch. Yeah, because I woke up and I was
19:30
facing a wall. So I was like, what is this? And
19:33
my eye just so closed was like, ah. Ah! It's
19:36
like beating the couch up. Damn, dude. Yeah,
19:39
no, I used to go in a few, like, just stupors,
19:43
man. I would just go and just start drinking
19:44
and just not stop, and then I would wake up and
19:47
then just, like, every now and again, like, I
19:50
would just wait a little bit and maybe eat something,
19:52
and then just basically just get looking forward
19:54
to drink again, and I'd just start drinking again,
19:56
basically. It's a dangerous cycle, you know,
19:57
alcohol. My mom was an alcoholic, so I definitely
20:00
have to keep an eye on that and not go overboard.
20:03
So I can definitely see the dragon. Yeah, and
20:06
I can see what it is and I can sort of I think
20:09
I have a decent like handle on it I didn't want
20:11
to stop. There's something else I can't Yeah,
20:16
I get it I just can't control that dragon. I've
20:19
got the Naruto Uzumaki fucking nine tails inside
20:22
like you're fucking Get another beer I do I get
20:26
it man. Yeah, and I thought like a lot of the
20:28
buddies that I talked to you like when they Went
20:30
and was like when they would go drink they would
20:32
have like the the wherewithal to be like No,
20:36
no, I'm good. I need to take a break for a minute.
20:38
Yeah, like me. I just can't do that I don't have
20:40
it Well, I'm proud of you for being able to stop
20:42
it because that's like a really difficult. That's
20:43
no I'm not joking That's like like like I said,
20:46
my mom was like an alcoholic and she she's turned
20:48
her life around and I'm so proud of her Oh, man.
20:51
Yeah, but it was good. Good for your mom, man
20:53
Yeah, it was a huge problem in my childhood.
20:55
Sure. So I definitely can respect that it being
20:57
like a serious issue Yeah, because yeah, it's
21:01
just not fun. Yeah, it's not good when it becomes
21:04
like an actual thing So what was life like for
21:08
you growing up? Where are you from? Just tell
21:11
us about yourself, dude. What's up? Hey, my name
21:15
is Lino Rodriguez. I'm from South Mississippi.
21:18
I grew up with my mother back there. I'm bad
21:21
at doing this. No, it's okay. I got you, bro.
21:24
I got you, man. I appreciate you. Yeah, no, life
21:28
was weird as a kid. I was like a Puerto Rican.
21:30
in Mississippi. Yeah, that's weird. In a white
21:33
family. Well, like, excuse me. So, you said white
21:38
family? Yeah, I was the only, like, brown kid
21:40
in my family. Oh, no shit. Yeah, because my dad
21:42
died before I was born, and he's from Puerto
21:44
Rico, right? So, he, like, dropped me off, you
21:49
know? Like, on the island? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
21:51
Like, he, like, he got to American land and just
21:54
started shooting babies off, like, cannons, like,
21:59
at a football game. They do that. Yeah, yeah,
22:02
yeah. They do that. If you get your chance to
22:04
have your feet on American soil, fucking have
22:06
kids, man. Just go... Yeah. Yeah. And then run,
22:09
I guess. No, he didn't run. No, no, I'm sorry.
22:12
No, no. That man got stopped in his tracks, I'll
22:16
tell you. My dad, he was killed. He was murdered.
22:20
Sorry to hear that, man. I hit a sound effect.
22:28
Sorry, dude. I hit the wrong one. I'm sorry.
22:35
I just hit the first one. I was like, okay Yeah,
22:47
he just stopped Where's my camera? Where's my
22:52
camera right here? My dad was murdered when I
22:55
was a kid My mom was an alcoholic I Know it is
23:13
kind of fun. Yeah, I have clubbed feet My feet
23:24
in the clouds just right Oh Wow Goddamn dude.
23:30
That's awesome. So like what did uh, what did
23:32
your mom do like growing up professionally? Oh
23:35
fuck. Oh, she was uh, she works at hospitals.
23:37
I think she was an EMT No shit. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah,
23:40
that's what I am. Oh, well, there we go Hi mom.
23:44
Yeah, you know, let's go. Well, this is your
23:46
camera I love how you looked at mine. I was like,
23:51
it's not seeing you. My mom's in there. My mom's
23:55
in there. Well, man, that's cool as shit. Does
23:58
she ever used to tell you any stories about that?
24:00
Not really. I think she... I honestly might have
24:03
got... I know she worked in the hospital. She
24:05
worked in the emergency room for sure. Yeah.
24:07
I don't know if she was on the ambulances as
24:08
much, but she did at one point. Oh, okay. And
24:10
honestly, I never asked. I never thought to.
24:13
Oh, okay. Yeah. No worries. Yeah, I think she
24:16
was busy a lot. Yeah, yeah, no, it's true, man.
24:18
There's so much like so much like there's there's
24:21
a lot I really. Like I go to work every day.
24:23
I don't come home and like debrief my girlfriend,
24:25
you know, it's just there's just so much and
24:27
it's just after a while It just becomes a job
24:29
and then you're just doing it and you know bring
24:31
home a head that was severed like look at this
24:33
Yeah, there's been some crazy shit every now
24:38
and again I've heard man. I've heard that that
24:40
can be do you have any fun ones you'd like to
24:42
share? With the class. Oh my god, dude. There's
24:45
there's so many like cuz I've worked like I've
24:48
been doing it for like about, shit, what year
24:50
are we in? Yeah, I think about six years now.
24:52
All right. You know, so like a long time. Oh,
24:54
you started right like right after COVID or right
24:56
in the middle of it, really? Yeah. That's beast,
24:58
dude. Yeah, it was it was pretty crazy. And so
25:00
like when I was when I was out there, we were
25:01
still kind of going through COVID. So I had to
25:03
do like the preventative measures and things
25:05
like that back then. But yeah, there's there's
25:08
honestly there's a bunch, bro. There's a bunch
25:10
of shit. Everything that you can think of really
25:13
like car accidents, you know, motorcycle accidents,
25:15
those are rural. I've got a fun one. I don't
25:19
like any fun poop ones. Oh, yeah. Any poopy ones?
25:23
Yeah, yeah, because that, okay, so yeah, that
25:25
happens. And sometimes I'll feel like... depending
25:28
on who it is, sometimes I'll feel bad about the
25:30
fact that they're experiencing that. Yeah. You
25:32
know, I'd be like, oh man, I'm sorry that that's
25:34
going on. Oh, just shitting in the ambulance
25:35
on the way like fucking, oh. Yeah, it's happened.
25:38
Yeah, I believe it. You know, it always fucking
25:40
sucks because we have we got to clean it. Yeah.
25:43
You know, and so like afterwards, you're sitting
25:44
there like in like in the worst part is like
25:47
you're sitting in like the ambulance bay and
25:49
and everybody can see you when you're just like
25:52
cleaning the shit from the ambulance. It's embarrassing.
25:55
It's like I mean sort of they they understand
25:58
they've been through it and so like oh it sucks
26:01
Exactly, and then you just keep walking, you
26:03
know, but uh, yeah, but yeah, dude You know everything
26:07
from like, you know, like the worst ones are
26:09
always children in any way shape or form has
26:12
sound effect Oh, that's that's bad but uh But
26:21
yeah, like so so that you know, like Seeing group
26:25
homes, like I think that's kind of weird is that
26:28
there's a lot of illegal group homes that are
26:31
happening. So we'll go. Illegal? Illegal. Illegal
26:33
group homes. Like there's like squatting. So
26:36
what that looks like is essentially somebody's
26:38
house that they opened up for like to have a
26:43
fake nurse. I know what a group home is. Yeah.
26:46
And then people just live in their bedroom. So
26:48
they basically pay for rent and then they have
26:50
these older people who are oftentimes like demented.
26:54
Yeah, and they have like, you know, they just
26:55
have dementia and shit like that And so they
26:58
they don't know where they're at and then all
27:00
of a sudden they wake up and instead of them
27:01
being against a wall They're like what the fuck
27:04
is going on with me Oh, yeah, you know and that's
27:07
always like fucked up because that's like it
27:09
feels like just disposable people It's like people
27:12
just didn't want their family members anymore.
27:14
So they threw them out They feel how I feel when
27:16
I woke up on the couch. Where the fuck am I?
27:21
But yeah, no, it's like, it's unfortunately like
27:23
with EMT shit, it's like, it's usually like kind
27:26
of sad, but every, you know, every now and again,
27:28
you get like some crazy ones, you know, shit
27:30
like this guy, he shot himself once like in the
27:34
thigh and he was like totally cool. Like he was
27:38
like, nah man, I'll just drive myself later.
27:41
And we were like, bro, you shot yourself in the
27:44
thigh. Like you need to go to the hospital. Nah
27:49
man, I'm good. Pretty much. Nah, but I shoot
27:51
myself all the time, don't worry about it. Pretty
27:53
much. Yeah, this happens like once a month. Yeah,
27:57
but we can't kidnap him, so if he says that,
28:00
basically we're like, all right, sign here. All
28:02
right, dude. His friends call him Holes. That's
28:06
our buddy Holes, he does this all the time. Oh
28:08
man, Holes, he's just always up in that shit
28:10
doing it, man. You shoot yourself again. We tell
28:12
him to put the safety on, he's like, I don't
28:13
want to. He said he was going to stop shooting
28:16
up. Yeah, well, he couldn't stop. He kept shooting
28:20
himself. And that's why we call him Holes. And
28:22
he also loves that movie. That's his favorite
28:24
movie, Holes. Yeah, he ain't shy the buff about
28:26
it. So when did you actually come to Austin?
28:31
About five years ago, four years ago, four years
28:34
ago. What brought you here? Comedy. Just comedy?
28:38
Yeah, comedy. Starting a life out here in Austin.
28:42
You know, the classic, I got on Kill Tony thing,
28:45
and then you're like, I want to pursue comedy
28:46
in a bigger scene that I, there's something different,
28:50
you know? Louisiana, Mississippi, I've been around
28:53
that my whole life, I've never been in Texas
28:54
before. I came here, had a fucking street taco
28:57
or something, I was like, I'll stay. One street
29:01
taco, you're like, you know what? All right,
29:03
actually kind of cool. Yeah. Yeah, this is kind
29:05
of cool beans. The free fried beans at this taco
29:09
shop, I'm living here. Dude, I really want some
29:13
fucking tacos now. It's amazing. So honestly
29:16
that was like one of the things that drew me
29:17
to Austin was I loved the food trucks. Now I've
29:19
lived here for a while. I'm like, you know, the
29:22
food trucks. But I know girl that wasn't really
29:24
a thing we had all the time. There's food trucks
29:26
everywhere. I felt like I was in like a mall
29:28
almost, but with food everywhere. Yeah. Yeah,
29:30
I noticed that too. Now that you're mentioning
29:32
it, there is like a fuck ton of food trucks.
29:35
A shit ton. Yeah, especially right there by the
29:37
creek. Yeah, everywhere. Everywhere. If they
29:39
militarized, Fucking food truck militia, bro.
29:44
I'm just saying we have to watch out. You have
29:47
to watch out for the food trucks I don't know
29:49
what's in there. No, no one else really knows
29:51
what's in there Oh, who knows dude actually actually
29:55
since you mentioned like, you know, they asking
29:56
about a story Yeah, I actually do have something
29:59
that surrounds a food truck sick. So yeah, so
30:01
this dude he like um So I have to be careful
30:05
with the details. But anyway, so this dude calls
30:06
us up and he uh, he's he's having an allergic
30:10
reaction And he's saying that he can't breathe.
30:14
He's starting to like kind of develop hives,
30:16
things like that. And we were like, okay, cool.
30:20
Well, of course now we have to start asking the
30:21
questions and stuff like that, which is usually
30:23
centered around like, okay, when did this start?
30:25
And like, why did it start basically? And he
30:28
goes, he's like, yeah, man, I just went and I
30:31
ate at a food truck, really. And we're like,
30:33
oh, okay, so you might have a food allergy. And
30:34
he's like, no, no, actually I don't. And I was
30:37
like, you don't have a food allergy? He's like,
30:39
no. And I was like, I'm not no pussy, dude. Right.
30:42
I was like, so tell me what your allergy actually
30:45
is. And he's like, oh, roaches. Oh. Oh, no. Yeah.
30:51
And I was like, which food truck did you go to?
30:54
Oh, man. I was like, yeah, dude, I'm not fucking
30:57
going there. Yeah. Was it a Mediterranean one?
31:00
Was it one of those ones where they actually
31:02
eat roaches in their own country? You know, look,
31:05
you seen those? No. You seen this? You talking
31:08
about the actual roaches? Yeah, I don't know
31:10
what country it is. I'm not gonna put one specific
31:12
country on blast saying they eat bugs, but...
31:15
They might get mad at you. They could possibly
31:17
get mad at me for that. If I was just like, I
31:19
don't know, Bangladesh loves eating roaches.
31:21
Somebody from Bangladesh is like, damn it! Motherfucker!
31:27
Everyone keeps saying this, we don't eat roaches.
31:30
We stopped a long time ago. I don't even know
31:33
if that's a Bangladesh accent. I don't either,
31:34
but it sounds good. Sound effect. Yeah, sorry.
31:44
I probably shouldn't have palmed that. I literally
31:47
lost all my focus just now. That's what my brain
31:52
sounds like all the time. Oh yeah, yeah, that's...
31:56
Yeah, that's pretty much mine, too. I'm gonna
31:58
have to figure out how to edit that out. Oh,
32:01
no. Leave it in. No. Lino said leave it. We're
32:04
gonna leave it. No, you're the boss. I'm just
32:06
on your ship. It's sinking. No, no, no, no. I'll
32:12
get a bucket. I'll get a bucket. Abandon. Abandon
32:14
the ship. But, uh, I don't even know. I don't
32:16
even remember, dude. I literally wiped my fucking
32:18
slate clean. Oh, what you were thinking about
32:20
and everything? Oh shit. I had a follow up. Food
32:22
trucks, roaches. Food trucks, roaches, Bangladesh.
32:26
Oh, the food of the roaches. I don't know. Like
32:29
you've seen like the candy roaches and like ants
32:31
are the food of the future. There's that hot
32:33
sauce that puts ants in their hot sauce. Oh,
32:36
yeah, that's right. Yeah. Yeah. So we were like,
32:38
we can eat this because we're sort of prepping
32:40
for when the world explodes, I guess. Yeah, I
32:42
think also. The Starbucks pink drink for a long
32:46
time there had, it was basically made out of
32:48
shit that was bugs. Whoa. Yeah, the bugs make
32:51
the pink stuff. Are you lying to me right now
32:53
or is that real? No, it's real. I would get my
32:56
phone, but it's watching us. Starbucks, we're
32:59
watching you. That's gross. That's disgusting.
33:04
You can't just have, it's pink, but it's just
33:06
like, I don't know. Right. The tailbone of a
33:09
whale. The tailbone of a whale bone, dude. Yeah.
33:12
So what up? So why did you get into comedy in
33:15
the first place? What was something that drew
33:18
you to that? Comedy, I've always liked laughing.
33:22
I've already told you some of the stuff that
33:24
happened when I was a kid, so something that
33:26
made me happy was always the scapegoat, you know?
33:30
Yeah. So I had a lot of surgeries growing up,
33:34
so I'd hang out in a room all the time, and I
33:37
get tired of video games. Just sitting in the
33:40
bed, vegging out. And I'd go across Comedy Central
33:43
and I'd see those old 30 minute specials. And
33:47
I'd just watch the fuck out of them. And I just,
33:49
over time, I never thought I could be a comedian
33:51
because I'm from Mississippi. Yeah. Seriously.
33:56
What? I'm being dead serious. I don't know. It
33:59
must be the same way, like, if you live in, like,
34:00
Alaska or something. Like, you feel like you're
34:02
in the middle of nowhere. This isn't anywhere
34:04
near right where the stars are. The stars are
34:06
in New York. They're in California. They're like
34:08
Las Vegas. Yeah. It's not a Mississippi thing.
34:12
Sure. Yeah, I totally feel that. Yeah, for sure.
34:14
I'm going to work in the oil field. Right. Yeah.
34:17
I'm going to work at my uncle's shrimp boat or
34:19
something, you know? So I never thought it was
34:21
a thing. But growing up, I used comedy just to
34:24
like, I don't know, escape. It's like everybody
34:26
else does for a bit. Yeah. Yeah. Laughing's fun.
34:30
We've been giggling, having fun. The soundboard
34:32
for having a good time. That was perfect. Hell
34:36
yeah. So yeah, man. Uh, Gabriela Iglesias was
34:40
my first favorite comic. Oh, yeah, he's good.
34:43
Yeah, Gabriela Iglesias and Jeff Dunham. So you
34:46
like Jeff Dunham? Yeah, I love Jeff Dunham as
34:48
a kid. Most people from Mississippi do. Oh, yeah?
34:51
What, uh, like, was it the puppets? Yeah. The
34:55
thing that got you, like, where you're just like,
34:56
hell yeah, he's got puppets. Yeah, yeah, I had
34:58
the jalapeno on the stick, you know? Yeah. Meow.
35:02
Yeah, yeah, yeah the racist puppet old man. Yeah,
35:06
dude. I know you like I know he's good because
35:08
I've watched some of his stuff Yeah, I have I
35:10
do have trouble connecting with him on a humorous
35:12
level for some reason but like what is it about?
35:14
What is it about him that you find funny? Honestly
35:18
it back in the day. I was young so I thought
35:20
it was just hilarious. Yeah It's also like magical
35:24
being able to throw your voice and have two conversations
35:27
going on at once with yourself, and the audience
35:29
believes that's actually happening right now.
35:31
At least, when I was a kid, I was like, whoa.
35:33
Yeah, and it's so quick. Do they talk? Right.
35:37
It comes like a little dumbass kid in the middle
35:38
of Mississippi in a diaper, like... Yeah, and
35:41
you're 12. Yeah, I'm 13. I'm going to puberty.
35:45
I'm like, Jesus Christ, this guy's amazing. Just
35:48
take the diaper off, dude. No, I still have it
35:50
on right now. I never got uncomfortable without
35:54
a diaper or so, you know. Well, that does explain
35:56
the smell. Yeah, that's my fault. I gotta change.
36:00
So was something about you, like, comedically
36:03
that people don't know that you do? Fuck, I don't
36:07
know. I mean, like, I don't know if I'm known
36:10
enough for people to know I do anything, you
36:12
know? Yeah, that was kind of a weird question.
36:14
So let me kind of rephrase. I guess I mean, do
36:20
you have a particular method when you're writing
36:23
or anything like that? Or how is your writing
36:27
kind of evolved? Honestly, just constantly working
36:32
on stuff that I find fun. I don't know like I'm
36:34
not like a sit down for hours type of guy But
36:36
I have been in the past, you know, yeah, I don't
36:39
trying different things like I can show you on
36:41
my phone That like it is just stupid like it's
36:46
just just ideas Yeah, you know just something's
36:49
funny chive TV in jail just in case DMT Just
36:52
random things and I'll go to do a mic and I'll
36:55
have that thought in my head and try to work
36:56
it out Okay, so you basically just like write
36:58
it down in your notes and then you'll just take
37:00
it and just bring it on stage and everything
37:02
Yeah, cuz I feel like generally if I like write
37:04
in my notes and have like like I Like when I
37:09
read it, I'm like, oh, yeah, that's what I was
37:10
talking about Yeah, so I can sort of remember
37:13
the whole joke almost it's like storing them.
37:15
It's like storing stuff Yeah, yeah, I do that.
37:19
I do that too pockets of memory. Hmm. Yeah, exactly.
37:22
I do that too. Like I'll just You know, like
37:24
if I have just a crazy idea or something like
37:26
that, I'll write it down as a prompt. And I'm
37:28
like, the worst part is a lot of times I can't,
37:30
like what I think of initially is going to be
37:32
like really funny. And then, and then when I
37:34
go back to write it, like I know I forgot you.
37:37
Yeah. And also I could do a lot of things better
37:40
in terms of like comedy and things like that.
37:43
Of course, there's like everybody that's like
37:44
working on something that they love. I don't
37:47
record myself. Okay. People say that's essential.
37:51
hate you to like go watch your recordings and
37:54
listen and it might be mm -hmm I just yeah, I've
37:58
never been over really do that. I sort of like
37:59
base I Off of how I felt when I left. Yeah. Is
38:03
there any particular reason why you didn't? Don't
38:06
ever yeah, you don't ever record yourself. I
38:08
think honestly most times I forget to okay because
38:11
when I'm about to go on stage That's all I'm
38:12
thinking about Mm -hmm, and I just forget about
38:15
that aspect of it a little bit Like I could bring
38:17
my whole camera, like I could bring my tripod
38:19
with everything in my bag with me to the show
38:22
or whatever. And once I get in the building to
38:25
do the show, I don't even think about that again.
38:27
No? No, I just start thinking about, I'm about
38:30
to do comedy. I start thinking about my notes.
38:32
Yeah. Yes, I forget all the time. Even people
38:35
are like, yeah, you just put audio record on
38:36
your phone. I just don't, I always forget. You
38:38
just don't do it. I just forget. Yeah, yeah,
38:40
I'm not a smart guy So I've seen you like, you
38:44
know, like your roast battles and things like
38:46
that. Yeah, you know, it's like oh god, dude
38:48
Oh fuck. I just I forget there was one you just
38:51
fucking killed. Oh What was it? Is it some of
38:54
the lingo roast? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah that dude.
38:58
That was insane I loved that. Thank you. That
39:02
was so good. Yeah, tell us about that man Like
39:04
what was going on in your mind and like, you
39:06
know everything leading up to it and during it
39:08
Uh, so, uh, every time I get a roast, I sit down
39:13
and I honestly, I need to stop doing this, but
39:15
I'll wait until like a week before, no matter
39:17
how long. And I sort of, uh, what's it called?
39:21
Stress prep. Stress prep. Yeah. Yeah. You know,
39:23
cause it, it, that helps me get motivated. I
39:25
think it was like ADHD thing or something when
39:28
like, you know, if you have too much time, we
39:31
need a debt. Anyway, that's not important. This
39:33
is lame. Like you're, you're looking like the
39:35
deadline adding the pressure. Actually drives
39:38
you yes. Yeah, I get it. It's a weird thing,
39:41
and I don't like it, but that is what it is I
39:43
mean I will be thinking about it a lot until
39:44
it happens, but like I the points of pressures
39:47
on that's when like my body sort of locks in
39:49
right sure Going into that roast. I was really
39:52
excited about it. I was sort of nervous for some
39:54
of the jokes I was going to tell mm -hmm because
39:56
when I did that slave auction joke I That was
40:00
a fucking good one, dude I Ran in my people some
40:47
people were like you probably shouldn't tell
40:48
that joke You know sure and I was actually sort
40:51
of terrified to tell it I I thought it might
40:54
be not a lot of people know that I'm like my
40:56
grandma's black or like things like that I look
40:58
like a white guy to a lot of people sometimes
41:00
You look just like me. Yeah, I look just like
41:02
you. Some people, like people think I'm Italian
41:04
or like something like, I don't know, whatever
41:05
the fuck, but I don't look black to people. So
41:09
when I saw a joke like that, I'm like, this is
41:11
going to come across crazy. And it was awesome,
41:15
dude. It's probably honestly, I don't want to
41:17
like, it seems braggadocious, but it's like one
41:19
of the most like viral Rose battle clips. Yeah.
41:23
Yeah. That was, dude, like being there live and
41:26
like watching that. That was epic, dude. It was
41:29
fucking hilarious. Some of those jokes I came
41:32
up with that day, like the L -I -N -G -O thing,
41:36
me and my buddy, Clem, we worked on that together
41:38
on that creek outside of the Vulcan. That's my
41:41
comedy job. We came up with that one like 20
41:45
minutes before the roast. There's no specific
41:48
way to do these things. They just sort of happen
41:50
in a way. I find when I over -prepare, I screw
41:53
myself. Sure. You psych yourself out? Yeah, 100
41:56
% big time. If I sit down and I have dirty jokes
41:59
that I'm ready to tell for this person or whatever,
42:02
that's too many jokes. Gotcha. That's too much.
42:05
I can't decide which one. I'll replace one last
42:08
minute mentally, and it will just fuck up the
42:10
whole flow of everything. Yeah, hold on one second.
42:14
Sorry, I don't mean for us to have all these
42:16
timeouts and everything. No, no. I just want
42:18
to make sure that the microphone isn't obstructing
42:21
you. Oh, this right here? Yeah, got you, got
42:22
you. Yeah, yeah. So if you wanted to, like, kind
42:24
of... Oh, do this? Yeah, yeah. There you go.
42:27
Like this? Yeah. So just... This is comfortable.
42:30
Yeah, that's a lot. That looks better, I think.
42:32
Yeah. Okay, cool. I guess... Yeah. Proceed. That
42:36
video went nuts, man. I never expected it to...
42:41
It's one of the coolest things. You never know
42:44
what's going to happen when you post something.
42:46
Sure. But I posted it and... And I was like,
42:50
uh, all right, that's going to be fun. Immediately
42:52
just started fucking. Just blowing up. Yeah.
42:55
Like 10 ,000 every few, like 10, 15 minutes.
42:58
Where's it at now? Uh, the video itself is almost
43:01
700 ,000 likes and it's almost at a million shares.
43:05
Dude, that is insane. So it's like, like in like
43:08
almost one viral kind of thing. Yeah. 11 million.
43:12
11 .1 million. Dude. Yeah. Oh my God. Like seriously,
43:16
it was crazy. They didn't have a trial reel going.
43:19
uh that it's at six million on that one no shit
43:24
what the fuck is that another roast the same
43:27
one i just posted them at the same like a little
43:29
bit different time separately guys trial rules
43:31
are really good for you if you're trying to like
43:33
do videos online because it puts it out to an
43:35
audience that you don't even know oh you see
43:38
yeah i'm gonna have to try that Because I don't
43:42
think my audience likes me very much. I didn't
43:44
love you. He's a sweetheart. Isn't he guys? That's
43:46
your camera? Oh, yeah We need like five of these
43:56
I want to have like a whole bunch of fun and
43:58
just fucking right to do to do Oh, yeah, like
44:00
the drummer from that one band Who knows yeah,
44:04
do do do do do do do yes, so you like you prepared
44:08
during crunch time and everything. And do you
44:12
get any kind of, I don't know, any kind of facts
44:16
or anything that you know that you can pick on
44:18
this dude about? Yeah, usually we exchange information,
44:20
you know? Oh, no shit. Yeah, we send each other
44:22
notes and stuff like that, stuff they can make
44:24
fun of. If we have more questions, then we just
44:26
sort of, you know. Like, you never know how it's
44:29
gonna go. Like, I've talked to someone like three
44:30
in the morning the night before, and they're
44:32
always like, what about this? Oh, okay. So it's
44:35
not like bad blood? No, it's usually, it's all
44:37
love. Like, I don't really have any bad blood
44:39
towards anyone I'm roasting. And if you do, it
44:42
just sort of sucks. Because you're, like, trying
44:44
to hurt their feelings or whatever. Yeah. So
44:46
that brings me to another question. I've asked
44:47
this before to, like, to people who are roast
44:50
comics. Like, has anybody ever sort of crossed
44:52
the line and, like, said something that legitimately
44:54
was, like, oh, dude, that's not cool? Not really,
44:58
no. It's more of stuff that you, like, aren't
45:00
prepared for that they knew, you know? Like if
45:04
you didn't discuss about something in a roast
45:06
battle and then they like bring it up in the
45:08
roast As uh, you know i've had that happen to
45:11
me like so get it wait get into that a little
45:14
bit like what do you mean by that? Like when
45:16
you ask facts for each other you tell people
45:17
different things like if they had like specific
45:19
facts about something you didn't know about Right
45:21
and so like so when they go off it's leverage
45:24
in a way Yeah, like this is what you could talk
45:27
about. Yeah. Okay, but no, it's like uh, let
45:30
me let me try to uh Because I've done this to
45:32
someone and I've done it had it done to me and
45:34
I realize it's not really a fun thing to do.
45:37
Where you just pull. Pull some shit. Pull some
45:39
shit off. Yeah, I get it. Yeah. Yeah, that does
45:42
suck. Yeah. Yeah. I realize how much it sucks
45:44
when it was done to me versus the other way around,
45:46
too, you know? Yeah. Because you're like you'll
45:49
be talking to someone about a roast and they're
45:50
like close friends from like wherever the fuck.
45:53
And then they give you a fact about them. You're
45:55
like, oh, this is going to be fun, but it might
45:56
be mean, but it's fun. Yeah. And then you do
45:59
it. You're like, oh, I actually sort of felt
46:00
mean. It so changes the dynamic. Yeah. Yeah.
46:04
Yeah, you hope you're still friends afterwards
46:06
Yeah, yeah, it's a I've only been doing this
46:10
for like two years like this roast battle stuff
46:13
only yeah, I mean, that's a long time Yeah, it
46:15
feels like in the scheme like I don't know. I
46:17
haven't had like 20 plus battles or anything
46:19
I'm probably in like the tens. Oh, okay. Yeah.
46:22
Yeah, I've like I haven't been doing it like
46:23
that much, but I have been doing it So I'm still
46:25
learning so that's like something you have to
46:27
learn. I'd recommend comics if you want to like
46:30
Do roast battles just like laid out on the table.
46:33
Mm -hmm So where it's not or just like go have
46:35
dinner with the guy or something. Mm -hmm Oh,
46:37
yeah, and just kind of just spitball. Yeah, I
46:40
love that now that makes it like just that makes
46:42
me like makes it feel a little bit better I think
46:44
yeah before my general idea was that You guys
46:50
didn't even like they would like look at your
46:52
fucking What the hell was that? Anyway, they
46:54
would look at your like Instagram or some shit
46:57
like that and then just pick random things, you
46:59
know, like I just didn't know. Yeah, no, we try
47:02
to like it's like a it's like a buddy system
47:04
almost, you know, like really fucking cool, man.
47:07
Yeah, because it's a it's supposed to be all
47:09
of us there. You know, sure. Like if you're like
47:12
about to dig into somebody is supposed to be
47:14
like all of. Okay, but it cannot be like you're
47:17
still roasting somebody and you can still be
47:19
mean if you want to you know It's there's like
47:21
a fun fine line of things you are able to I don't
47:25
even know it all yet You know yeah in terms of
47:27
crossing lines because you could just completely
47:29
cross the line and just just be Yeah, you know
47:34
just be the nastiest person in the world is because
47:37
I don't think then I don't think it'll be funny
47:38
then it can be But not always for the person
47:41
that's getting roasted Sure. Yeah, because then
47:43
it becomes about like who's going to win. Yeah.
47:46
Like, well, I mean, like who's going to win,
47:47
like an argument sort of. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's
47:50
not even roasting anymore. Yeah. It's just insulting.
47:53
Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. But it's a beautiful
47:57
thing, man. It's really fun. It's helped me grow
47:59
as a person roasting. You have to not take yourself
48:03
so seriously and like in life in general, especially
48:05
like roast battles because like It's all it's
48:08
for the love of comedies that it's the game of
48:11
that we're playing. You know, yeah, it's for
48:13
the people Yeah, to make them laugh. You're sort
48:15
of sacrificing yourself. You're like image or
48:19
person or your soul mm -hmm be laughed at for
48:22
these guys it's not always just stand -up comedy
48:24
where You could you control the whole narrative
48:26
of everything about you on stage, right? It's
48:29
like, you really put yourself out there to be
48:31
executed. It feels like those old Coliseum things
48:37
where they're like fucking... I know, it does.
48:40
There's even a panel of gods on the side just
48:43
like, is he funny? Yeah. Whose joke do I like
48:46
more? Should we kill this motherfucker? Yes.
48:49
We'll let him live, we'll let him die. It's like,
48:55
dude, ah, damn it. And it goes both ways, you
48:57
know? And there's so many factors and stuff like
48:59
that that you don't think of. Like, since that
49:03
video went viral, a new factor that I've had
49:05
to do with myself is the amount of pressure I
49:07
put on myself now. I put a lot of pressure on
49:10
myself in comedy, especially that now, because
49:13
I feel like people are looking at me to do like
49:14
that again. Yeah. Yeah, that makes sense. Yeah,
49:17
you want to live up to people's expectations,
49:19
you know? Absolutely. Yeah. But I'm tired. It's
49:29
better what is wrong. I know I was like, why
49:31
do I keep doing that? All right, I'm sorry. Well,
49:35
yeah, it's just like uh, yeah, just because it
49:38
it's like that meme you see on the internet all
49:41
the time now The next battle is yourself Yeah,
49:50
that's what it feels like the next you've leveled
49:52
up the next battle is You. You. Bum, bum, bum,
49:57
bum, bum, bum. That's what it feels like. It
49:59
really, yeah, it does, man. It does. What is
50:01
the most challenging aspect that you found of
50:03
comedy? Honestly, just the social anxiety. I
50:07
don't know if you can tell that about me, but
50:08
I have crushing social anxiety sometimes. It's
50:12
crazy. Really? Yeah. I'm surprised I could be
50:15
in front of a crowd. What is it about social
50:18
anxiety? Well, what happens to you? I don't know,
50:20
like, I hate, like, I'll give you an example.
50:23
Like, when I was in college, sitting in the classroom
50:26
drove me fucking insane. Absolutely. Yeah. Just
50:29
surrounded by people, the glances, everything
50:32
in the side eye, every little movement. I think
50:34
it might be kind of like a combination of like
50:36
my ADHD. Sure. Hyper -focused on everything.
50:39
So everything that's happening in the room, I'm
50:41
fucking clocking it. And so when there's a lot
50:43
of people in the room, there's a lot happening.
50:46
Yeah. And my mind is just boom, boom, boom, boom,
50:48
boom, boom. But if I'm in front of the crowd,
50:51
I'm what's happening. Hey. You know? It's me.
50:55
We can all just relax. I don't have to worry
50:57
about you for a second. And then if you heckle
50:58
or try to, you know, slap me in the face, we're
51:00
talking about your wife, you know? Then it becomes
51:04
a problem. But yeah. It really does. The biggest
51:07
aspect, like I did, for instance, I did the comedy
51:10
mothership roast battle for the first time this
51:12
past weekend. Oh, man. Hell yeah. How was that?
51:15
I lost. Okay, yeah, I think I thought I think
51:18
people tell me I was funny Yeah, right, but I
51:21
have been ripping myself apart because of my
51:23
my nerves got to me my anxiety that that That
51:27
will like the amount of pressure you put on yourself
51:29
to perform. Well, yeah, like you can prepare
51:33
all you want You can prepare you can prepare
51:35
so much. But once you feel that feeling that
51:37
you've never felt before Mm -hmm. You don't know
51:40
like my first joke didn't go really the way we
51:43
were the first battle to So it's just sort of
51:45
like that type of thing. You're first. It's like
51:47
opening a show. And I told the first joke in
51:51
the night and it didn't really land the way I
51:53
wanted it to. Oh, wow. And that feeling that
51:56
came over me is something I never felt before
51:59
because I've never performed on that stage like
52:02
that before. I get it though. I get it, yeah.
52:05
And immediately that just, I mean, I held my
52:08
own and I made the crowd laugh and stuff. I can
52:11
make them laugh. Mm -hmm in terms of the whole
52:14
roast I was like super super in my head to the
52:17
point where I couldn't be there I wasn't present
52:19
at all. Yeah, like kind of hit you like a wall
52:21
Yeah, just the present. Yeah, just being present
52:23
like I'm almost not there anymore But I'm still
52:26
there and I'm still goofing and having a good
52:27
time and we're having fun But I'm like over here
52:31
Yeah, I get it. Yeah. He's like, what's up, Lino?
52:34
How you doing, man? This isn't exactly going
52:37
the way you wanted, did you? I'm like, yeah,
52:40
what's up, dude? What's up, my guy? Yeah, yeah,
52:43
yeah. I do get it, man, because there's been
52:45
times when I would just go out and I would have
52:50
it set in my head. And I'd just be like, OK,
52:52
in my head, I would imagine I know where people
52:55
are supposed to laugh at. Yeah. And then - This
52:58
was the funny part. This is the funny part if
53:00
you don't think that's funny and then you get
53:01
up and you say it and then fucking wait No, no,
53:06
no Yeah, yeah, that's all dude. So you're like
53:10
Immediately, you're just like, okay, like it
53:13
just that one initial Fuck like it can throw
53:17
off your entire thing immediately. Oh my second
53:20
joke. I stumbled over the words Okay, you know
53:25
and instead I like being like quick on my feet
53:27
enough to be like I'm just to start over guys
53:30
Which is something I could have easily done like
53:32
I'm just gonna start that one over boom take
53:35
two Yeah, I didn't I was like why fuck that one
53:38
up didn't I? Hey, what's gotta laugh? Well, that's
53:42
fine enough. I guess let's get this going. Yeah,
53:45
I'm not winning this battle whatsoever when Aldo
53:47
Mikado hilarious, dude He was just fucking murdering
53:49
it and I just wasn't fully You know, yeah, it
53:54
was in the pocket got it got to figure out get
53:57
in the pocket But you know that loss is a beautiful
54:00
thing in a way Because it rips the band -aid
54:03
of that fear Yeah, that fear is not really there
54:07
anymore. I'm not scared anymore. Yeah, cuz I
54:09
was terrified not gonna lie Plus the stage, you
54:15
know, it's like you're being at the mothership.
54:17
Yeah the stage. Yeah, you want to you want to
54:20
make a good impression? Yeah, you know Even I
54:23
even texted Brian Moses like the next day like
54:25
hey, man. I know it didn't go the way Anybody
54:28
I know I didn't go the way he wanted I wanted
54:30
to blah blah blah and he was like so kind about
54:32
it He was like no you were great. What are you
54:34
talking about type of thing? I'm like, oh don't
54:37
lie. Yeah. Yeah. Why are you lying to me? I'm
54:39
only I'm only kidding. Why do you hate me? I'm
54:43
only joking. I'm sure you did like a lot better
54:45
than that's what everyone's telling me and that's
54:48
fine But that's like sort of part of all of this,
54:49
you know, yeah You're gonna be your worst critic
54:53
for the rest of your life, Rob. Every time, man.
54:55
Every time. And I get it, dude, because I've
54:58
been that way many times. But the thing is, me
55:03
personally, I'm not very funny. I'm not good
55:05
at stand -up. Like, 100%. I haven't really learned
55:08
how to do the writing kind of thing. How long
55:10
have you been doing it for? Three years. All
55:12
right, yeah, dude, it takes time. I'm five years
55:16
in, and I'm just now starting to get like my...
55:19
Sort of footing. Yeah, I get it. You know, yeah
55:22
It's yeah, it it's hard. It is hard Yes, it's
55:29
not easy. Everyone was like I can just do that.
55:31
It's like no it's not Something that everyone
55:34
just does unless you're an insane person like
55:36
us, you know, right? I was like, it's not a thing
55:38
that you just do like there is there is a method
55:41
to it And it's sort of like, like you gotta learn
55:45
like all the different like just aspects and
55:47
like idiosyncrasies of it and stuff. This thing
55:49
is like in my face. It's just like, please don't
55:53
fucking hit me. And a lot of the thing that people
55:56
don't realize about comedy, I think, is that
55:59
it's a mental battle. It is. Like it's a huge
56:02
mental battle. Like, for instance, like, like
56:04
again, if I didn't do as well, like I didn't
56:07
do as well as I wanted to the other weekend.
56:10
Right. So now I've been like, do I belong? You
56:13
know, things like that. Yes. Do I, do I belong
56:15
here? Yeah. Am I, am I actually funny? Did I
56:18
deserve to be up there? That, that thing, you
56:20
know, but then there's like the other part of
56:21
me is like, you wouldn't, if you didn't deserve
56:23
to be there, then you wouldn't have been. Yeah.
56:27
So there's just all these things you gotta, oh,
56:30
you're on stage. Oh, you gotta pee, you gotta
56:32
pee, you gotta poo. I gotta take a shit right
56:35
now, I don't know. Oh wait, what was my next
56:37
joke again? Fuck, what was my next joke? Oh,
56:39
I should have smoked half a joint earlier, that
56:41
was so stupid. Right, right. Yeah, I promised
56:44
myself I wasn't gonna get high before stand -up
56:47
comedy shows and I did it again. Yeah, are you
56:49
thinking all that on stage? Yes. Yeah. Yeah.
56:51
Wow. While I'm telling the jokes. That's crazy.
56:54
A hundred percent, yes. That's crazy, because
56:55
I better, you know, like, when I'm on stage,
56:59
like... It's like I'm telling one joke and my
57:01
mind is sort of thinking about the next one.
57:04
Like I'm trying to set up like in my head, like
57:06
how it's going to be. And I try to make myself
57:10
like a little bit more present. Exactly. That's
57:12
the battle I'm talking about is being present.
57:14
You're battling to be present. Yeah. Because
57:17
I could let those things overcome my thoughts
57:20
or I could just not and just keep flow stating.
57:23
Yeah, and just keep rolling but that's the battle
57:26
and that's a lot of the learning that your is
57:27
like mental fortitude You're like training yourself.
57:30
You're training yourself. Yeah, it's it's it
57:32
is kind of crazy Like there there's so many people
57:35
that like I'll come across who just randomly
57:37
be like, oh, yeah I wanted to try that and it's
57:39
like yeah, go ahead and do that, but it's not
57:41
exactly a thing that you're like Yeah, let me
57:44
just go try like it's like I'm not like, you
57:48
know, I'm just going to go to the standup real
57:50
quick and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. It's
57:51
like, when you get to a point that you're like,
57:54
oh, I want to make this like the thing that I
57:56
do. Yeah. You know, kind of like music, deciding
57:58
to do music. Yeah. You know? How seriously are
58:01
you going to take it? How seriously are you going
58:03
to take it? Which I have a hard time with. If
58:06
you can't tell, guys, I'm a goofy, fun, loving,
58:09
having guy. I like to have a good time. Maybe
58:11
it's still a fault. I like to have a fun time.
58:15
But that's what I try to bring, too, so I feel
58:17
like if I stop trying to have fun, then I won't
58:19
be as fun. Yeah, yeah. You know? I want to be
58:22
that fun guy on stage. But like, yeah, taking
58:25
it serious, that's why I say five years, because
58:27
five years ago I started trying to take com.
58:28
I like did like an open mic or two like a couple
58:30
years before that, but that doesn't count. I
58:33
know what you mean. Five years is like how long
58:34
I've been trying to do this. Some people can
58:38
stumble into it. Some people are just savants,
58:40
but like for the most part, like you have to
58:41
really want to do this and love it enough to
58:43
like... You know, take the punches and the failures
58:46
and whatever, along with the successes. You just
58:49
got to keep rolling, I guess, if you really want
58:51
it. Yeah, if you really want it, man. Yeah, if
58:53
you really want it, you've got to do it. Yeah.
58:55
But you can try stand -up comedy. Anyone can
58:57
try anything. I could try pooping in public tomorrow.
59:00
Yeah. But am I going to do it all the time? Only
59:02
if I'm committed. Yeah. Yeah, I agree. Because
59:05
I'll probably know somebody who can help you
59:08
with that or hold your hand and stuff. I'm talking
59:11
about the street, but yes. I'm talking about
59:14
the fucking street, right? Yeah, that wasn't
59:15
gonna hold my hand in the street. That's something
59:16
I had to do on my own. I was like, yeah, I can
59:18
arrange for like a pickup around noon. Yeah,
59:21
I need a baby pooper. It's just a baby poop.
59:28
That was really good. All right. Dude, like every
59:32
now and again, I'll just pull that out. Yeah,
59:34
that's a good voice. Thanks, man. I like to like
59:36
order food like that, you know, like back in
59:38
the day when you could order like dominoes or
59:41
some shit. I used to be, I used to call up like
59:43
whatever and be like, I want two pepperoni cheese
59:46
pizzas with cheese and pepperonis on the place.
59:50
And they would be like, with baby Elmo. Can you,
59:52
can you get your mom or your dad? Like they're
59:56
not waking up. You know, it's so strange. I haven't
1:00:02
been back in a week. Dude, you sounded like a
1:00:04
whole different person there. I'm Michael Jackson.
1:00:08
Hello, I'm important. I'm special. I'm a comedian.
1:00:14
Right, oh. I'm a comedian. Fucking, oh. Egos,
1:00:19
bro. Egos. The ego's like, oh, you gotta let
1:00:21
that shit go, right? They gotta fucking chill
1:00:24
with that shit. Yeah, I found myself getting
1:00:26
like a slight big head at one point. I'm like,
1:00:28
you dumbass. You know, do you know where you're
1:00:30
from? You grew up in a FEMA trailer. Before Hurricane
1:00:37
Katrina you just had a FEMA trailer Yeah, I left
1:00:44
over from fucking Camille or something they're
1:00:46
just like yeah, I mean we had a FEMA trailer
1:00:49
we had a bit of pet pig That is a phenomenal
1:00:53
joke honestly like the fucking before hurricane
1:00:57
Katrina had a FEMA trailer Yeah, that's so good.
1:00:59
And you had a pet pig. Yeah, we had a pet pig.
1:01:02
I don't know why we had it We didn't have a farm
1:01:04
or anything We just had we had like a small pot
1:01:07
of land and we got a pig for some reason. I don't
1:01:09
know. We'd eat shark. We're weird people Shark.
1:01:13
Yeah shark. Yeah, I mean good I was too young
1:01:15
to really remember but from what I people described
1:01:18
to me now is like chicken. It's like chicken
1:01:19
ish Dude, I hear everything is chicken. Yeah,
1:01:23
it's meat. I was like, yeah, it's like chicken,
1:01:26
except it's a shark. Yeah, except it's a fucking
1:01:28
shark. Yeah. I remember one time when they brought
1:01:31
a young blue shark out. I don't know, legality?
1:01:35
I don't know what kind of shark it was or if
1:01:36
it was endangered or anything. So guys, please.
1:01:38
And also, I was a baby. Blue shark lives matter.
1:01:40
They do. It's one of those flags, but instead
1:01:46
of a black line, it's a shark. Yeah, like I remember
1:01:54
one time when I was young we they like brought
1:01:56
a shark and like a small pickup truck It was
1:01:58
in the back and like what why is this here that
1:01:59
we're gonna eat it. All right Okay, yeah, and
1:02:02
that's it. That's it. Yeah, that's it All right,
1:02:05
dude my my growing up. We had a sailboat. We
1:02:07
had a small sailboat We go out on we had like
1:02:10
a little pawn to we like to go on boats a lot.
1:02:11
Mm -hmm There's little wave runners, you know,
1:02:14
talking about the little, what the fuck is this
1:02:16
called? Yeah, I think so. Jet skis, right? No,
1:02:18
no, no, that's a wave runner. Oh, then I don't
1:02:20
know what you're talking about. Those little
1:02:21
metal boats with the single engine on the back
1:02:23
of it. I can't remember the name of it. Piro?
1:02:26
Piro? John Boat? John Boat. Yeah, I think a John
1:02:28
Boat, maybe. I don't know. I smoked a joint earlier.
1:02:31
Fan Boat? Fan Boat. Not a fan boat. Not a fan
1:02:33
boat. But we'd fish on those two. Oh, OK. I remember
1:02:37
one time when I was young, I keep saying when
1:02:39
I was young, because I'm old now, guys. Yeah,
1:02:42
I just turned 30. You just turned 30. Yeah, I
1:02:45
just turned 30. Oh my gosh. Congratulations,
1:02:47
man. Happy birthday. Thank you. I appreciate
1:02:50
it. Dirty 30, dude. Dirty 30. You're gonna get
1:02:52
crazy. I'm gonna be a nasty boy. Damn, dude.
1:02:55
30? That's it? Holy fuck, dude. I'm getting old
1:02:57
as fuck. Yeah, how old are you? I'm 41. Wow,
1:03:01
you look great, dude. Thanks, man. Look at the
1:03:02
camera. Wait, this is your camera over here.
1:03:06
Oh. Yeah, yeah. Well, fucking being 30 feels...
1:03:14
I don't know. I was really scared. I was like
1:03:16
a day at like 29, the last day of being 29. I
1:03:18
was like crying. Really? It impacted you that
1:03:22
bad, huh? Not that bad. I did some ketamine and
1:03:24
I got real sad about it. What is ketamine like?
1:03:28
Ketamine, it feels like life's in slow motion
1:03:30
for like a second almost. It can either make
1:03:32
you really happy or like really emotional. Oh,
1:03:35
weird. Yeah, it's a horse tranquilizer. Didn't
1:03:37
know that yeah, that's what that it is. They
1:03:39
use it for therapy now, too It was like a very
1:03:41
therapeutic drug really kids don't do drugs.
1:03:43
It's bad for you, but it's so fun. I Have never
1:03:48
I've like I've never even done that it was at
1:03:50
a party once I went to and then somebody was
1:03:52
like straight like railing fucking ketamine there
1:03:55
Yeah, he was like do you want some ketamine?
1:03:57
I was like um what is it? You know like I was
1:04:00
just asking him about it and There was really
1:04:04
it wasn't a very good explanation. No, so he's
1:04:07
probably high as fuck on Ketterman. Yeah Now
1:04:10
you say that he's probably having some fun on
1:04:12
that kit. You know I'm saying yeah, I've I've
1:04:15
experienced experimented with drugs in my life.
1:04:18
I used to work at a pot farm in Washington Whoa,
1:04:22
that's awesome. Yeah, I uh, we're the place called
1:04:25
fat panda I don't know if we could talk about
1:04:27
that fat panda why I don't know I'm gonna slander
1:04:31
him a bit Slander. No. I got fired because I
1:04:35
like to bring my phone into the room. You're
1:04:39
not allowed to bring your phone in the room.
1:04:40
That's a big no -no. But the only reason I did
1:04:42
it was to play music for everybody. Because we
1:04:46
all listen to the shitty radio all day. Yeah.
1:04:48
And I'd come in there and start playing some
1:04:50
Juicy J or something and we'd all be popping.
1:04:53
pumped as fuck, like right, put there on some
1:04:55
Metallica, and we're like, there's some tool,
1:04:57
and we're in the weeds, just fucking dun -dun
1:04:59
-dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun
1:05:00
-dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun
1:05:00
-dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun
1:05:01
-dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun
1:05:02
-dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun
1:05:03
-dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun
1:05:03
-dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun -dun - Barter
1:05:19
fairs. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know if
1:05:21
I should blow up the spot on it or not, but it's
1:05:23
a I don't know. I don't want to say nothing,
1:05:27
but it's a fun time. I'm sure cops know what
1:05:30
a fucking barter fair is. They're not retarded.
1:05:32
Or are they? Every time I hit it, I'm like, I
1:05:39
hope this is a good one. But now I don't know
1:05:43
what a barter fair is. Like I said, I'm looking
1:05:48
at everything all the time fucking a barter fair
1:05:51
and I'm also thinking about fashion You know,
1:05:53
it's fine. Ah a barter fair because it doesn't
1:05:56
necessarily involve drugs if you do the drugs
1:05:58
part That's sort of what you do, but it's not
1:06:00
really all it is, you know, oh So it's a feather
1:06:03
All right kids gather around Lena uncle Lino's
1:06:07
got a story for you So they have uh, so they
1:06:11
have these festivals in the woods, right? Awesome.
1:06:14
Yeah, it's like an EDM festival Oh, yeah, and
1:06:17
you go out and they literally have some of like
1:06:19
the most like like the best speaker just in the
1:06:21
middle of It's a random stage in the middle of
1:06:23
the woods and the fucking you know, that's what's
1:06:25
up And everyone's living in like school buses
1:06:27
of course intense and there's like there's a
1:06:30
drum circles, you know Oh, yeah, I do the drum
1:06:33
circle did not like me because I had rhythm Because
1:06:37
you had rhythm you actually play music and they
1:06:39
were like what the fuck? Yeah, they're all And
1:06:45
I come in there with a... And they're like, yo,
1:06:49
who is this guy? Hey, stop that. Yeah, stop that.
1:06:52
What are you doing? We're white people with dredge.
1:06:54
Let us do what we do. Yeah. You'd think hippies
1:06:56
would be a little bit more, like, inclusive.
1:06:58
But instead, they were like, hey, don't bang
1:07:00
my drum, man. You're banging on my vibe, dog.
1:07:05
Right. That's really kind of fucking up my flow,
1:07:09
dude. You know, I didn't say anything, but I
1:07:13
sure felt it. Yeah, I'm sure you've been carrying
1:07:16
around the spirits of that like Congo for a while
1:07:19
or a conga Oh, yeah, I just came to the con the
1:07:22
congo circle. I came in and just fucked up the
1:07:24
vibes with some with some soul Neo soul in there
1:07:31
they were ready for these magical fingers on
1:07:33
the bongos We're like dude. Can you play any
1:07:37
fish man? Yeah, as a matter of fact, I can they
1:07:40
start playing ween instead. Oh shit, man You
1:07:43
start playing ween push a little daisies and
1:07:46
make them come up Yeah, yeah, I'll fucking always
1:07:50
it was again that oh the barter fair so like
1:07:51
you trade you barter for everything oh So like
1:07:55
I like this. I like your shirt, bro. I'll trade
1:07:58
you half this half a coffee for it Yeah, and
1:08:01
the guy can either say yes or no Yeah, and that's
1:08:03
sort of and then when you know other stuff start
1:08:05
getting and starts getting involved you can sort
1:08:07
of imagine How it goes right? Yeah, I got these
1:08:11
crystals, man And you have crystal meth, man.
1:08:15
You wanna trade? Right. I saw a guy do the most
1:08:19
LSD I've ever seen at one of those fights. I
1:08:21
did the most LSD I've ever done at one of those
1:08:24
guys. How much? Oh, man. So these friends I had,
1:08:31
we had vials of LSD. Word? Yeah, yeah. So one
1:08:36
drop is a hit, and it was like a thousand hits
1:08:39
in a vial. Jesus. Did you just drink it? I got
1:08:43
close. No. So it was just like LSD and Everclear.
1:08:50
Whoa. So it was like crystals of LSD. So if you
1:08:52
put like a blue light on it, it turned like completely
1:08:54
green because of how pure it was. Jesus. Yeah,
1:08:56
it was like a lot. It was a fun time. Dude. Just
1:09:02
kidding, kids, don't do drugs. I had the best
1:09:04
time of my life. What the hell happened to you
1:09:05
during that time, man? Oh, dude, I was living
1:09:09
with these guys, so we were just... Living Grateful
1:09:11
Dead style for a while just like every day the
1:09:13
house we lived in was like Beatles themed because
1:09:16
the owner like was a huge fan. So we just Fucking
1:09:19
Beatles everywhere. Yeah. Yeah, well Lucy in
1:09:21
the sky with diamonds all the time LSD. Yeah,
1:09:24
let's do it Lucy in the sky with diamonds. It
1:09:27
was fun Like I said that guy so a drop is like
1:09:30
a tiny drop. Yeah when I saw it he put a puddle
1:09:33
Jesus, there's a puddle on his hand. Oh my god,
1:09:36
and he licked that And then he put a drop in
1:09:40
his eye, a drop in the other eye, and one drop
1:09:42
in each ear. The fuck, dude? I think he did a
1:09:44
drop on his tongue, too. Yeah, it was a lot of
1:09:47
LSD. He probably did, like, fucking... Is it
1:09:49
different? Like, does it make it different if
1:09:51
you put it in your ear versus your eye? I think
1:09:53
that's what he was trying to find out. Oh, okay.
1:09:56
I never got the chance to ask him. I didn't realize
1:09:57
that this was experimental. I think it was fully
1:10:00
about science. I kind of thought that he was
1:10:02
like, you know what? I have a method. Do not
1:10:04
judge. I've been doing this since I was 12, boy.
1:10:10
Like 20 minutes later, he's like... Oh, the next
1:10:16
time I saw him was like the next morning. No
1:10:18
way. And he was... He was at the breakfast table
1:10:22
with his head like this. Like, dude, there's
1:10:25
no way he wasn't still tripping. No, he 100 %
1:10:28
was. He 100 % was still tripping. And I was inspired
1:10:31
enough to be like, he can do a puddle. So can
1:10:35
I! Damn, dude. You blasted off. How long were
1:10:39
you tripping for? Probably like 14, 15 hours.
1:10:42
It was a long time. Probably still a little bit
1:10:44
in the morning, but it does wear off. You're
1:10:45
like, I'm still tripping, dude. Yeah. Oh, man.
1:10:49
If there's a psych or not, if that's a thing,
1:10:53
I've tried to be one, at least for a little bit.
1:10:57
Because I did the puddle. I just saw crazy. Visuals
1:11:02
that you got like a lot of shit on the line you
1:11:03
people people who've done it. No, it was just
1:11:05
intense It was very intense. Yeah, and then I
1:11:07
probably I did whippets and all these crazy shit
1:11:09
mushrooms Yeah, dude, I actually it's really
1:11:12
ridiculous how high I was trying to get for really
1:11:14
no reason at all I mean, but I get it though.
1:11:17
Yeah, the funny thing is dude like You know,
1:11:21
uh, you know AJ. Um Yeah, that's my buddy. Yeah,
1:11:25
I told him I told him I was gonna be on here.
1:11:26
He was uh, yeah. Yeah, we work together Oh, no
1:11:28
shit. I just now realize that you fucking work
1:11:31
at Vulcan. Yeah, I love AJ. So his episode is
1:11:33
out. Guys, go catch his episode. But his episode
1:11:37
is out, dude, and we had this little part where
1:11:38
we were talking about the very same fucking thing.
1:11:41
And I did an eighth of Mushrooms, and my world
1:11:44
was flipped upside the fuck down, but not in
1:11:47
a good way. I've never had a good trip. But I
1:11:51
think it's because I'm too much of a control
1:11:53
freak. They don't like to let loose. Yeah, so
1:11:57
we got we got like about like 10 more minutes.
1:11:59
All right cool, but uh flow I'm having a good
1:12:01
time. Yeah. Yeah, but uh, but yeah No, I like
1:12:03
to I like to let loose and uh, you know but I
1:12:06
mean I like to be in control and it's hard for
1:12:08
me to let loose is what I was trying to say and
1:12:10
and so It just I don't know like even the thought
1:12:13
like he was talking about how he made the mushroom
1:12:16
tea and that was how he like preferred it Yeah,
1:12:19
and uh, and did you just like straight like eat
1:12:21
that shit? Yeah, I was speaking of like at the
1:12:24
bar to fair like you could get anything you wanted
1:12:27
Yeah. Anything you want. It was crazy. One time
1:12:30
we were all chilling in a bonfire, right? And
1:12:32
this guy pulls his car, he backs it up to the
1:12:34
fire, opens his trunk, excuse me, he opens his
1:12:39
trunk, he pulls out like a 10 gallon bag of mushrooms,
1:12:43
and he's like, hey, who's hungry? Holy fuck.
1:12:45
And we walked over and there were like mushrooms
1:12:48
longer than my fingers, you know, that were like
1:12:51
white and purple. Jesus. And I ate like three
1:12:53
of those. And then, I had half of a mushroom
1:12:58
chocolate, and I think I was tripping on LSD
1:13:00
at the same time. Oh my god, dude. What's going
1:13:05
on in your mind? What happened? There's nothing
1:13:06
going on in my mind. I'm just a little goblin.
1:13:10
No, no. What was your tripping like? It was really
1:13:13
hard to put words into it. I got so high. At
1:13:17
one point, I sat in the back of my car to fall
1:13:19
asleep, and I just closed my eyes. It looked
1:13:22
like the Windows starting screen. Yeah, just
1:13:26
slowly, I saw like a sun, it looked like it was
1:13:29
melting. I stared at the sky for hours, like
1:13:31
the stars. Really? The stars, man, the stars
1:13:34
are so beautiful. Legit, that sounds peaceful
1:13:36
though. It was great. I started like a group
1:13:39
of people staring at the stars. I would have
1:13:44
joined in too, man. Yeah, because I was staring
1:13:46
at the stars for so long, I noticed that they
1:13:49
were moving. And I was like, hey man, that fucking
1:13:52
star up there is moving. If you watch it long
1:13:54
enough, it's moving. And he's like, no way. I
1:13:57
was like, yeah, check it out. And then the next
1:13:59
person came along like, what are you guys doing
1:14:00
staring at the sky? Like, man, that fucking star
1:14:02
is moving. I swear to God. Until it was like
1:14:05
20 people in a circle. We're all just sitting
1:14:07
there staring at the stars. And then some guy
1:14:09
who wasn't high off his dick came up. I was like,
1:14:11
what are you guys doing? They're like, we're
1:14:13
staring at the star, man. Look, it's moving.
1:14:15
It's daytime. Yeah. What the fuck are you talking
1:14:21
to? The clouds? Yeah, it's 12 in the afternoon.
1:14:24
You guys are looking directly into the sun. It's
1:14:26
noon. The guy that walked up that was smart was
1:14:31
like, so how long have you been staring at the
1:14:33
stars? Like a couple hours, I guess. Yeah, the
1:14:36
earth's spinning. The stars are gonna move over
1:14:40
time. You're like, yeah, dude. I could see it.
1:14:43
I can see it actively Yeah, it's it's fucking
1:14:46
crazy, dude, and we're all spinning right now.
1:14:48
We should really get some water guys We should
1:14:51
really get some water out here. Oh my gosh, dude.
1:14:54
Well shit, man This has been fucking awesome,
1:14:56
dude. I love this. Oh, yeah, but uh, like to
1:14:58
sort of like wrap it up Do you uh, do you have
1:15:00
anything that you want to put out? Once again,
1:15:02
this is your camera Not that one What do I want
1:15:09
to put out there a positive energy? That's what
1:15:11
I want to put out there. Oh, yeah, dude Yeah,
1:15:13
you know guys in this life is her music and Wait,
1:15:19
wait, wait. All right guys so sometimes things
1:15:25
get rough and When things are rough, you know
1:15:28
what you gotta do. You gotta be tough. All right
1:15:32
Yeah, keep pushing keep moving forward no matter
1:15:35
how weird things get Be funny when you can. Love
1:15:39
your friends. Fuck the haters. Give it all to
1:15:44
God. Yeet, yeet. I'm saying, drop the beat. Hell
1:15:52
yeah, dog. Well, dude, let me turn this off.
1:15:59
No, but in all seriousness, yeah, man, catch
1:16:03
me when you can if you can see me doing comedy.
1:16:05
I'd love that. Making people laugh is one of
1:16:07
the most fun things to do in the world. I love
1:16:09
it. It brings me to cool situations like this
1:16:11
where I can hang out with a buddy. It talks some
1:16:13
shit. Yes. And entertain the people that need
1:16:16
to be entertained. The masses. The masses. With
1:16:19
fat asses. Yeah, man. Just try to be good to
1:16:25
yourself. Be easy to yourself. That's it. Yeah.
1:16:29
Yeah, that's it. Awesome, man. Well, dude, thank
1:16:31
you so much for coming, man. I really appreciate
1:16:33
it having you, dude. Thanks, man. Thanks for
1:16:34
having me. Seriously, it was fucking awesome.
1:16:36
Yeah. Well, shit, that's it, dude. You guys,
1:16:39
thank you so much for tuning in. Remember to
1:16:41
buy tickets to the December 11th show. Lino,
1:16:44
my host, go follow him and everything. I mean,
1:16:46
my guest. I own this now. You own this now. This
1:16:49
is all yours. Thank you so much for watching.
1:16:51
That's it. Adios. Adios.