Latest / The Defender Podcast / Opening Hearts and Homes: A Journey into Foster Care with Makyna and Matthew Hart

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Opening Hearts and Homes: A Journey into Foster Care with Makyna and Matthew Hart · The Defender Podcast

• 0:02
  Herbie Newell: Welcome to the defender podcast, a resource to help mobilize and equip the body of Christ to manifest the gospel to orphans and vulnerable children. This podcast is a ministry of Lifeline Children Services, and I'm your host, Herbie Newell. It's Wednesday, May 15, 2024, and doctor Rick and I are coming to you from Birmingham, Alabama. And we are joined today by Matt and McKenna Hart, and we're gonna talk today specifically about foster care and National Foster Care Month. And in this episode, we are joined by, as we said, Matt and McKenna.
• 0:37
  They are gonna share their journey of opening up their hearts and home to vulnerable children, and they're going to uncover with us the realities, challenges, and triumphs of fostering while also offering encouraging and practical insights for those who might be considering entering into foster care. Matt and McKenna have been together for 13 years serving in full time ministry on staff at Movement Church in Madison, Alabama. Matt serves as worship pastor while McKenna serves as family pastor. They are biological, adoptive, and foster parents, and over the last year, they've been actively fostering. They've cared for over 10 or they've cared for 10 children.
• 1:14
  Their passion lies in facilitating family reunification and nurturing enduring relationships with bio families of the children under their care. And we are so excited for you get to hear from Matt and McKenna and their journey and and and really the heart of foster care being reunification to be able to hear their heart for family reunification. But before we do, we do wanna just remind you of foster care and the the need for foster care. Children enter into foster care through no fault of their own and they are in need of safe, stable place to land while their parents work towards reunification. Lifeline's hope is that the body of Christ would be the hands and feet of Jesus to children in foster care, their birth families, and other professionals that serve them.
• 1:58
  Lifeline provides holistic gospel centered pre and post licensure training to foster families to equip them to enter into the mission field of foster care. Lifeline also offers training for local churches to equip the body of Christ to care for these children and families. While every person may not be called to foster, everyone can play a significant role in supporting and caring for foster families, birth families, and state caseworkers. Visit lifelinechild.org backslash foster care. Again, that's lifelinechild.org backslash foster care for more information or to see our show notes for more information about how you and your church get engaged with foster care.
• 2:40
  Well, this is the time of the defender podcast that people know and love. That's when the infamous doctor Rick, comes and opines for us all the things that are going on in the world, especially as it occurs to to foster care, to adoption, to orphan care. And so we are grateful to welcome the silver haired, silver tongued one, doctor Rick. Doctor Rick, what a what a great time to be able to have Matt McKenna on the podcast, but also to talk about foster care at this pivotal month.
• 3:13
  Dr. Rick Morton: Man, I'm really excited about this conversation that we're about to have. I'm also excited to opine for a few minutes because that I mean, who doesn't want to do that? I'm not really sure what that means, but I'm gonna go look it up right after we're done with this podcast. But Herbie, I'm I'm you know, today's a special day because the dash is back.
• 3:33
  Herbie Newell: The dash is back. I thought you had said we eliminated the dash.
• 3:36
  Dr. Rick Morton: Well, we did eliminate the dash and Helen Helen had completely banished dashes from the defender podcast. But as any good producer does, she obviously listens to the show and has heard that we have been missing the dash. And so we got foster dash care. So the dash is back. The dash
• 3:57
  Herbie Newell: is I mean, who who searches on the web without the dash? So really, we needed it back.
• 4:02
  Dr. Rick Morton: Honestly, my keyboard just puts dashes in automatically now because we because we become the people of the dash. So Matt, McKenna, one of the one of the things that you're going to learn about the Defender podcast, if you didn't already know, is that we have this annoying tendency to put 17 dashes in every URL that we try to use surrounding the podcast. And so it's been a tongue twister for us for a couple of years now. And all of a sudden, our production people just threw us a curve and they completely eliminated dashes. And so we've been in withdrawal.
• 4:45
  So, we're glad you guys are with us to celebrate the return of the dash. Thanks for thanks for joining us.
• 4:51
  Makyna Hart: What a monumental day. Thank you.
• 4:54
  Dr. Rick Morton: You had no idea of the significance of of like what this was gonna be. You you thought the significance was gonna be to talk about foster care, but we're
• 5:02
  You know, we're talking about foster care and the dash.
• 5:05
  Herbie Newell: Oh, yeah.
• 5:06
  Dr. Rick Morton: Seriously, we're, you know, we're having a little bit of fun, but but but your story and and and what you guys are doing through your family is, is is an incredibly serious thing, but but a pretty big God thing. And and so, I'd love for us to just, you know, kind of get into the story by helping the folks that are listening to us, just kind of know like how did you get engaged in foster care? What was it that God was doing to to bring the 2 of you to the place of of foster care being a part of of what He's called you to do?
• 5:47
  Matthew Hart: Yeah. Before we jump into the answer, I just wanna say that we're honored to be here. And it's really kind of amazing that anybody wants to listen to our story. I mean, we're just we're just people, you know, that have said yes to this. And don't I I don't think that we have this amazing story, but, you know, God's God's story is bigger than ours.
• 6:06
  So Yeah. We're just excited what he's doing through us. So if you wanna Yeah.
• 6:09
  If you wanna answer that first question.
• 6:11
  Makyna Hart: Yeah. I love that this episode started out so fun because we love to have fun. We love to laugh. Our house, we love to have it loud, full of laughter, just full of joy. You know?
• 6:24
  Because there's hard things in the world. But with God, he just turns it all into joy. Our youngest son, we adopted him in 2019, and, he has brought so much joy into our life. And, that's that's just one instance of, like, something that was really hard and something, heartbreaking, a lot of grief in that season and that loss of his first family, but has has just in a way grown our family through, friendship with his mom, and grown our family through adopting our son and adding him to our family tree. And, it's just been such a joyful time in our life.
• 7:08
  But really, that is the is the turning point in our hearts to, look into foster care. Foster care, adoption. It's all been on the table for us, probably have an unconventional looking family. We just wanted to, you know, I I don't know really what that was besides the Lord. Just, like, opening our hearts to, adoption into foster care and just loving as many children as we could possibly fit around our table.
• 7:44
  And so whenever we adopted our son, we we thought there was many more adoptions coming our way. But really, I was taken aback by when I met his mother and how I connected to her. And, it was just love at first embrace, as she laid on that hospital bed. And, I realized in that moment, I didn't just want this baby. I I wanted her.
• 8:14
  I fully wanted her to be a part of our family. And, we we have kept that relationship. I love her to death. She is one of the great places of joy and laughter and fun in my life. And it was that moment that even though we had discussed foster care, looked into foster care over the years, I realized, no.
• 8:38
  We we have a job to do to make sure, that as many children as we can will love and get our hands on can stay with their families and not have stories that end in adoption because it is so tragic and heartbreaking, you know. We really our hearts were turned towards family preservation and supporting mothers in crisis, families in crisis who need support to be able to parent their children again. So that was a huge, pivotal moment. And then, when Roe v Wade was overturned, that was, another moment for us of, you know, we're we're believers. We celebrate life with our whole hearts.
• 9:28
  But there was a part of me that I couldn't fully celebrate without having my hands on a solution and, working to help people that are gonna be in crisis, you know. So, it was actually the day that Roe v Wade was overturned that, I didn't even talk to Matt about it. We had I knew our hearts are knew our hearts were in unity over it. I just signed us up for an orientation class at Lifeline. The very day I said, my heart is exploding in celebration, and I have to do something.
• 10:06
  And, so that's how we decided to become foster parents. Thank God he was you know, he would have loved for me to talk to him about that, and we have since worked that out. But, but it was You were all in.
• 10:23
  Matthew Hart: It was hard at the time. At the time this happened, I was working night shift. Mhmm. And so I can't I guess I was asleep when it happened. So she couldn't really insult me.
• 10:36
  But, yeah, I mean, I I wanna touch on something she said, about keeping family units together. Mhmm. I was thinking about this earlier, and I was thinking about the verse that said that says, like, you know, God knit us in our our mother's womb. And I was thinking, like, he placed us there. And I was like, wow.
• 10:55
  That was we were all we all were placed somewhere. We all had our first placement with our with our mother. That's God's design and that's God's best idea. And, we want like, our goal is to preserve that if at all possible. Like, that our that is our number one goal is to preserve that.
• 11:12
  Because we have seen the heartbreak and tragedy of adoption that you don't really you don't really think about when you think about adoption. You don't think about, that a family unit is being separated. Mhmm. And it is tragic. And, because we've seen that, we our goal our number one goal is reunification.
• 11:36
  Yeah. And, yeah, I'm just I'm glad she signed us up for orientation without my knowledge. I was on board when she told me.
• 11:45
  Dr. Rick Morton: Surprise.
• 11:46
  Herbie Newell: Yeah. Big surprise. Yeah. Good morning. Right?
• 11:51
  Dr. Rick Morton: But but, you know, like, I think one one of the things you're I mean, Matt, you said something that I think is really important there. We we talk when we do, you know, pre adoption conferences and we're doing things to get families ready to adopt that like we only get here because of brokenness. Right? Like there's there is a there's a reality to adoption. While we think it's beautiful and we think it's something that, you know, testifies to God's goodness and all kinds of things that it it like it's still there's still brokenness there and it and it's still hard.
• 12:24
  And and I think, you know, McKinney, you said something that is I think is really profound. And it's crazy when I hear you say, that the like the day that the Dobbs decision came down is the day that the Lord impressed upon your heart to do this. And one of the things we've said for years in pregnancy counseling is a lot of these families that we see that, their birth parent makes the first right decision to choose life for her child. Like that's not the end of the story. And and there are a lot of those families that we, you know, where we see birth parents that make a that make a great decision, but then their ability to parent is not good.
• 13:13
  And we end up seeing those family later in foster care. And I think you intuitively made a connection that a whole lot of the church doesn't see. Which is, you know, part of being engaged in this holistically is is the fact that we do understand that and that, you know, being pro life, it's about more than being pro birth and and that this journey into foster care and what the Lord's led you all into is is just an extension of the conviction that, you know, he's given you and given all of us that, you know, that we were to honor and protect life. And so I just, you know, Herbie, I know I'm talking over you, but man, I just love that. I think there's a there's a reality that that y'all have have put out that is is something that we we just like we want more churches and more people in churches to come to that understanding.
• 14:06
  And so, praise the Lord that that's that's something that God, you know, just created in your hearts. Yeah.
• 14:12
  Herbie Newell: And we've said for years, Ethan, and and McKenna, it just rings so true that the Lord would prick your heart on June 22, 2022, is that for every child that's in foster care, there's a mom that chose life. And and it really does show our pro life commitment to say, how are we gonna stand up for that mom? How are we gonna care for her? How are we gonna wrap around her and and realize that we we as the body of Christ have something to give her? I I would be interested, you know, because I think a lot of people when they think about that and and they may hear your story and they may go, that's great.
• 14:48
  I think I can take care of a child. That's gonna be hard enough. But how do I care for a mom? I think I think a lot of times we wanna come up with fancy formulas or fancy programs. But but maybe just put the the action to the words.
• 15:02
  Like, what are some things that your family's been able to do for these moms that really is simplistic but but is relational?
• 15:11
  Makyna Hart: Yes. I I have had the most beautiful, encounters and friendships, true friendships. Like, through just our short time being foster parents, I I really consider them my my closest friends. I mean, I've talked to them every day, you know. It's a real friendship.
• 15:33
  And, so, I think that, you know, our friendship is two sided. I'm I am serving them and their family and I am, I am trying to be a support and encourager in their family. But it's also they give so much to me, you know. They're so warm and open to me. But I think that, one way I just I just blow through the gates the first time meeting them with, like, a card, just laying out my my heart for our relationship.
• 16:06
  You know? Just day 1, however I meet them, and I know that's not always to just lay it all on the table and be very up front about what are your intentions, what is your motives, you know. And so I just go in and I give whoever is there, recently a case. It was it was a mother and a grandmother and I just went in and I said, I'm on your team. Like, I am here for you.
• 16:33
  Like, I will keep your children safe. I include, a picture of, like, what the room looks like just to give them that peace of mind, that, like, my children are gonna be cared for and loved and taken on as family. But in no way am I going to step over your role as the mother. I'm gonna empower you as mom. I'm gonna make that role sacred again.
• 16:58
  And so, I just that's one way I just engage them immediately and I just share my heart. This is where I'm at, you know. And and when it's safe, you know, here's here's my phone number, here's whatever and I want to, be on your team, you know, really. And then, another way I would say is just advocating for them to be, doctor's appointments to come to facilitate that and really make sure that is happening, and making sure they have a voice in that. I think just any way you can find to empower them and have them be in that role at their rightful place as mother, you know.
• 17:42
  And, you know, it doesn't mean I'm not aware of, like, why they're in this position or mistakes that have been made, but I just really come into it believing the absolute best. And I think it really, releases them to a level to be at their best, you know. Does that answer the the question? I'm so excited talking about it. And I
• 18:02
  Herbie Newell: think it was a lot of times, what we we make relationships, difficult. And, really, that's what these women need, is they need those positive relationships, someone that's in their corner, someone that's gonna be encouraging them. And, you know, I I know I'm sure as you're ministering and and pastoring and shepherding families at Movement Church, you know, as well, a lot of them, what families need is someone in their corner, someone that's advocating for them and someone that's that's gonna be there. And that's that's just that's so important. I'd love to, you know, a lot of times, folks look at, like, Lifeline's role in the foster care space and especially as we're equipping families.
• 18:41
  And, you know, a a lot of times I know some of the organizations that equip families for foster care almost privatize it, but we've really felt that the Lord has led us to equip churches, but then really to equip families to send them, into the state system. Talk about how you've been able to make a difference as well and how you've been equipped to make a difference as well with the social workers and the system and DHR that's there in Madison County.
• 19:09
  Makyna Hart: Yeah. I I deeply love and respect every caseworker that we've ever had and the role that they are doing for children and for families. So, I I mean, when they come in my home, I'm feeding them, giving them drinks, you know, hanging out, and I try to make it a comfortable place for them, as well, you know, because I think that if you just treat everyone like family and you open up your home, like, you're you're opening up your home to this child, to everyone attached to this child, to all the people who need to come and be helpers for this child, and just make it a comfortable environment in the home to where it doesn't feel stressful on the child or, you know, it doesn't feel stressful on them. Just I'm keeping them in the loop. I'm emailing everything that I can think of to email, you know, all the the details that they would wanna know that just makes their job easier because I know their loads are so heavy, and I want to make their job easy.
• 20:15
  I wanna be easy to deal with. I wanna build relationship. I wanna build trust. And I have a lot of, long term goals of of what my role looks like in interacting. So right now, being so new, we are definitely in a place of just building a foundation of we're good, trustworthy people.
• 20:34
  We love the Lord, and we wanna serve you. We wanna be, a resource in any way to you. So I think that that kind of thing just just treating them with respect and not treating them like, I think there's a lot of like any government system there's issues, you know. There's so many issues, but there's wonderful human beings inside this system who are so passionate and working so hard for children and for families every day. And so, they they are they are my heroes in so many ways.
• 21:14
  Do you have anything to add to that?
• 21:15
  Matthew Hart: Well, just because of, you know, my work schedules, McKenna has, you know, taken the reins on dealing, in personal interactions with DHR and with, you know, case workers and with with, individuals from Lifeline. And, you know, my role in all that has just been to watch my wife's bloom, like, in compassion and love for people and just encourage her in that. You know, any chance I I get that I see, or she tells me about an interaction she had, I try to point out, you know, how amazed I am at her compassion and her love for people. So, you know, men who are listening to this who might have a work schedule like mine where you can't interact with DHR, like your wife does, just make sure you're encouraging your wife and, being a good support for her in that area.
• 22:14
  Makyna Hart: Yeah. Yeah. And I I just want to say like as far as, Lifeline goes and I promise I was not given anything to say. This is coming from such a pure place in my heart. But Lifeline is just the standard for excellence and integrity, and we are so grateful, to be trained by them.
• 22:37
  The attitude that we have, with DHR is very much given to us and, put in us from the people who trained us and equipped us to go into foster care. So I'm just so thankful for Lifeline, and I've been the biggest fan for years in ministry. You know? Of course, I've used so many of Lifeline's resources to, in different initiatives to care for, vulnerable children and families. And so there is just no one else that we would have turned to to train us for this season of our lives.
• 23:12
  We're very grateful.
• 23:14
  Matthew Hart: Very grateful for Lifeline. I I didn't know I mean, now looking back, I I would say confidently that I didn't know anything about foster care. And, you know, going to going through tips and and and just learning everything, I mean, just in those 10 weeks, I mean, I I had a whole new perspective, on on the compassion side of everything. Just that, you know, God has compassion for all, you know, and I believe Lifeline has compassion for all. And in everything they teach, like, it show it's just taught from a place of compassion, which is, I mean, a vital ingredient.
• 23:58
  Right? So, it gave me that perspective when I didn't have as much before. That's putting it lightly. I didn't have the compassion before that I have now and just so grateful for Lifeline for teaching us that.
• 24:13
  Makyna Hart: And the aftercare, the after follow-up, that's something that I didn't realize, going into being trained is I have I have no doubt that we would not be where we are without the the monthly check ins and the calls and the follow-up that Lifeline does with us after training us and sending us out. So, I mean, I have never had an issue, or just just something that was on my heart heavy for a family or for my my biological and adoptive children. Like, how to how to prepare and equip them. Like, I've never had a question, an issue, a problem that I wasn't immediately met with solutions and resources and everything that I needed to be successful and to help others.
• 25:02
  Dr. Rick Morton: Okay. So do y'all if like this if this thing in Movement Church doesn't, like, go well, you can just come be ambassadors for Lifeline. Okay? No, seriously. I mean, like, thank you.
• 25:14
  Because I Herbie and I get the privilege of being able to sit here and have this conversation with you all. But I think, like we have a we have a team of folks that are that pour their lives into coming alongside families and and wanting to support families well. And I I think it it blesses my heart to hear the things that y'all are saying because because it so resonates with with us. I mean, I think one of the, you know, one of the really cool things is what what y'all are saying is you've you've just grasped that every bit of this, there's a gospel opportunity in it. Whether it's with the child in your home, whether it's with the birth family that, you know, that you're inevitably going to be connected to or whether it's CPS and, you know, and the DHR workers that you have the opportunity to be around.
• 26:13
  There's like there's a gospel opportunity around every corner. And sometimes in the church I think we miss that, right? Like we get so focused on foster care and the child that we just miss really obvious things that God has put in our path. And so so thank you. Because I think you really in a very holistic way, you've really touched on all of it, except one thing.
• 26:48
  Now, you talked about birth families, and you've talked about the kids in your home, and you've talked about DHR, but like, what about y'all? Like, what has the Lord you know, kind of for you and in you as a result of of, like, leading you into this opportunity in foster care? I mean, Matt, you talked about it. I mean, I can't say you didn't. But like, I just I want to hear like, what's God done in y'all and for you as a result of of this, you know, crazy adventure that he's taken you on?
• 27:27
  Matthew Hart: Yeah. The crazy adventure. That's great words. We've we've seen, you know, we've seen 10 children come through our home. We've seen God work really amazing things in them.
• 27:40
  But like you said, like, he obviously, he cares about us too and he does work in us with each each of these ministry opportunities that we get. I've I have I have learned more about fatherhood
• 27:57
  Makyna Hart: Mhmm.
• 27:58
  Matthew Hart: In this last year. Just being able to have the heart of our father, you know, our heavenly father, to, to have his heart and to to have these these kids that come into our home, who, you know, in in the flesh, it's like, okay. I'm gonna give you food. I'm gonna give you a place to sleep. And we'll talk.
• 28:22
  And, you know, it'll be that'll be that that'll be that. You know? But, god works in deep ways. You know? And he gives he gives me I'm just gonna speak for myself.
• 28:34
  He gives me his love for these children.
• 28:38
  Makyna Hart: Mhmm.
• 28:38
  Matthew Hart: And, to see my heart opened up like that supernaturally because in my own power, I can't do it. I can't love the way that I've been able to just from from my own works, you know? But having his grace and his power, his ability to love, it's just it's just it's just cool to see how he has grown my heart and opened my heart. I feel like at the end of the Grinch, you know, his heart grows. Was it 3 times bigger?
• 29:07
  Whatever. I just feel like that, especially with this these these last, the girls that we had in our home. They were young, 1 2 years old, and I'm just caring for these babies. And I I hear God telling me, that is my job to be a covering for them. Mhmm.
• 29:27
  And it's it's a challenge, but it's also like a massive honor, you know, to be a covering for these babies while they're here. And, you know, I don't I'm I'm a human. I I don't always live up to the perfect standard of of our God. Right? But, the fact that God would look at me and choose me for this mission is just like it's just such an honor.
• 29:56
  Makyna Hart: Yeah. I I echo all of that. I don't think there's a place, that hasn't been touched in my in my heart. Everything has grown and expanded, to to hold, a part of God's heart and that reflection and his capacity and his ability, in me, in my motherhood, in my leadership, and just in in my friendships, you know. It's really, opened my heart in interacting with, bio families to just build friendships and and feel confident in in, who I am and the picture of God that I am to people and to the world.
• 30:44
  It's just, really developed, like, parts of my character that I don't think could have been developed or forged in any other setting. And and I feel like, you know, that's for us, but I also feel that for our 2 young sons, they're 58 years old, and I'm seeing parts of just godly men character rise up in them. And I'm like, who who is this? You know? Just parts of their hearts that are being developed, to be brothers to these children that are coming in our homes.
• 31:21
  And no matter if they're teenagers or babies or every everyone in between, I just see an inside of them as they interact with them and open up their their homes and their hearts and all their toys. I mean, their kids. They they it always surprises me how quickly they act like brothers and sisters and, you know, fight over things. But there's just, a part of their their hearts and their character that I I'm like, we wouldn't have seen this. We wouldn't have known this part of you if we hadn't walked this path as a family.
• 31:54
  And I'm just so grateful.
• 31:56
  Matthew Hart: Yeah. Especially, our our 5 year old is just a wild man and you would never guess interacting with him that he has this soft, gentle, compassionate side to him. Naturally, it just comes naturally to him. Like he was such a good big brother for the babies that we had here. Yeah.
• 32:16
  It was amazing.
• 32:18
  Makyna Hart: Yeah.
• 32:19
  Herbie Newell: You know, as we get into National Adoption Month, you know, I and we celebrate this. I know a lot of times when people hear about these things, one, they're hesitant because they're they've heard all the horror stories of what could happen or what would this look like or how would this change my family. I think there's a lot of myths out there about what foster care is and what it isn't. I think just 2 things I'd love for y'all to touch on is, 1, how would you dispel some of those myths? But then, 2, what are some of the hard things that families need to think through and and really say, lord, am I equipped to do this?
• 32:57
  So so both, what are some of the hard things, but how would you also dispel kind of these these these false myths that surround foster care?
• 33:04
  Makyna Hart: Yeah.
• 33:06
  Matthew Hart: You go ahead.
• 33:07
  Makyna Hart: Okay. I think, one of the things that I I feel like is a as a misconception is that it's just all hard, and it's all sacrifice, and it's all just, you know, and it's it's not. Like, we are full of joy, and we've been through some hard things. We have faced some very hard things. But, like, the difference is is when you are in God's strength and God's ability, it's somehow, at the end of the day, when you're exhausted and you're just crawling into bed, you know, after just a hard day, it's it's like your your heart is just so full and, you've realized, okay, I'm at a capacity that I've never been at before.
• 33:54
  And it this is, like, exciting. And this is, like, joy. This is real joy. Like, his joy is our strength. And so, we just keep that, like, that joy in front of us.
• 34:06
  And, no matter what has happened, no matter it's hard, like, if we have poured out, he is faithful to refill and he does refill. That's something I would say is is he will do it. He will refill you. It's your job to to lay it all out, to pour it all out, to just lay your actual body down as a bridge for people, you know, to get to whatever God's best is for them in their situation. But he's faithful to, like, pour it back into you and to care for you.
• 34:38
  And I feel like, knowing, like hearing me say that after after being in this a year, you know, I know that's we're still babies in this, but having 10 kids come through our home, we've seen some things. We've been through some things and I'm telling you, it's all joy. Like, if if God is your strength, like, it's all joy. It is so fun and so exciting and and I think that it's important to, like, take that attitude into something that is hard, you know? What do you think?
• 35:14
  Herbie Newell: Yeah.
• 35:16
  Matthew Hart: Like she said, when we're doing things in God's strength, I mean, he he said his yoke is easy and his burden is light. And he says, you know, come to me all who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you rest. Like so, you know, you've gotta be rooted in God's strength because in our own strength, this is exhausting and it's it's probably impossible, I would Mhmm. I would say, at least to do it with joy.
• 35:42
  Makyna Hart: Yeah.
• 35:43
  Matthew Hart: It's impossible to do it with joy without the Lord. But, yeah, it is it's hard. I mean, it's hard. And it's it's all there's every situation is sad. But the misconception would be that you can't do it because of that.
• 36:01
  No. You you can do it. And and you can do it because the Lord, is our strength. In his presence, there's fullness of joy. And, you know, if if God calls us to do something, if God calls us to to care for, the widows and the orphans, he's gonna equip us to to to do those things.
• 36:22
  Herbie Newell: Yeah.
• 36:24
  Matthew Hart: So if you ever think I can't do it, there's there's no reason there's no, good reason to believe that because God called us to do those things. And, he doesn't call us to do something that we can't do with his strength.
• 36:39
  Makyna Hart: Yeah. He already called us to you know, like, it's not if you are called to foster care. It's like, how? How are you individually?
• 36:47
  Herbie Newell: Way. Yeah.
• 36:47
  Makyna Hart: In what way are you called to foster care? We all have a different piece. But I feel like there's just there's I mean, there's so many misconceptions that we could talk about. I feel like, there's a misconception that that it's difficult to interact with bio families, you know. And we have had that experience, but that has not been the main experience that we've had.
• 37:10
  We've had beautiful interactions just being warmly received And, I would never ever expect them to feel that way. I would I don't think I would feel that way if I were in their position and I don't know this person who has my children, you know, but it's been it's been such, it's it's my favorite thing. You can probably tell by how much I'm talking about. It's my favorite thing to just build relationship with them and bring them into into the fold and into a place where they're gonna have that support system that they need to do what they've gotta do. And, I mean, I think there's a I think there's a big misconception about, when you go into foster care, what what ages to foster, you know, like, preferences on on different ages.
• 37:57
  And, I think that we went into foster care saying no babies and no teens. And we we wanted, you know, school age children, I think because probably because that's how, you know, the ages of our 2 children. And so, I think that, we we went in really adamant about that. And, basically, every child who's come through here has fit in those categories. And it's on the other side of that comfort zone, I mean, we I think, we say all the time, like, we would have missed this.
• 38:33
  Like we could have missed this. And if we had stuck to what we the box that we checked, the preferences that we had, we would have missed all of this. And you know, I feel like God's yeses for our lives are just like so much better than all of our noes. You know, we think we know what we want, but he knows. And if you're listening to his voice, if you're sensitive to his voice, he's gonna, like, he's gonna bless you.
• 39:02
  He's gonna lead you, and we've been so blessed. I think the one of the first placements we had was, 2 teenage sisters. And they were just with us for a short time. They were transitioning, actually home to mom. And we were just kind of like a short little bridge.
• 39:24
  But the first day that they were with us, I mean, I think you were scared out of your mind. Like, we were all so scared and intimidated. We didn't know what to do. You know, we've never, like, been parents to teenagers Or girls. Or girls.
• 39:40
  And, we had a moment in the kitchen as they were outside playing, and we just looked at each other and cried. Like, we could have missed this. And it it ended up being one of the most powerful like moments, for us. One of them while she was here, she I'll just tell this story real quick. I know I'm talking a lot but it's such a good God story.
• 40:07
  She told me she said, you guys are pastors. Right? I've always wanted to be baptized. And I'm like, oh, girl. Like, we can set this up.
• 40:17
  We work at a church. We can go there. She's like she's like, I don't think I can do it in front of, you know, a bunch strangers. I'm I'm like, that's what held me back in the past. And I'm like, well, it doesn't have to be, you know, at a church.
• 40:33
  Cheese. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I got that.
• 40:37
  But she was, like, she was adamant. She wanted it right then. I'm, like, you know, let's call let's call mom and we'll talk to her about it. And so she talks to her. Mom's like, yes.
• 40:47
  Like, follow follow this. That's a great decision. And, so, I mean, what? 30 minutes later, we were all crammed into our bathroom, and she's in the bathtub in her swimsuit. And it's it's such a a pure place of her in her heart to just, like, make that decision for the Lord in front of this family that she hasn't known that long and her mom by phone and her sister.
• 41:14
  And we're all just, like, cheering her on and screaming in the bath in the bathroom as as we baptized her in the tub. And it was just precious. Like, we could have missed that. And, you know, we've had plenty of teen experiences that weren't that beautiful and precious and wonderful. But, it that's the one that just marked my heart forever of, like, if God's yes is on it, if he's in it, we're going.
• 41:39
  We're doing it. Like, no matter what we think we want, no matter what, misconceptions or whatever that we've had about it, if he's if he's on it, I wanna be there. You know? Amen.
• 41:52
  Dr. Rick Morton: That's awesome. I I think, you know, I I mean, I I hear all of those stories and all those things that, you know that that God has done and the joy that you you know that you express through that. And And the reality is, right, like there is hard stuff. And that's part of it. But how gracious is the Lord to not leave you in that and not to, you know, not to make that the focal point of of, you know, what it is sometimes a very hard thing that he's, you know, that he's brought you through.
• 42:32
  And I just it's just really it's really it's really cool just to hear the the peace and the joy that the Lord has given you and you know, and finding satisfaction in the thing that he's given you to
• 42:48
  Makyna Hart: do. Mhmm.
• 42:49
  Dr. Rick Morton: Even when it's really difficult. I think, as we wind our time up today, I'm sure there are folks that are out there that are listening to us that are their hearts are stirred, right? And they're thinking about, okay, what is it that what is it that God could use me to do in,
• 43:13
  Matthew Hart: you
• 43:13
  Dr. Rick Morton: know, in this area? And and so what one piece of advice would you offer to people who God's dealing with right now, even as they're listening to us talk?
• 43:33
  Matthew Hart: I would say well, I'm I'm assuming, since this is a lifeline podcast that everyone listening or at least most people listening are Christ followers, believers. Our our goal in life, in all of life, is to be like Jesus and, to be a picture of him here on Earth. And, when I look at Jesus, his life, he never chose the comfortable thing. And he never chose the he chose the, what looks like the unknown. Right?
• 44:10
  He didn't even have a home to to rest his head. You know, he he never chose comfort and he always chose other people over himself. Mhmm. And, that's a great model for being a foster parent is, it's not gonna be the most comfortable thing. Right?
• 44:29
  But if we're called to be like Jesus, then comfort was never the calling. Mhmm. Easy, you know, just kind of, gliding through life was never the calling. Always putting people before yourself. And that means, you know, in this in this realm, in foster care, we're putting a lot of unknown, you know, we can call them strangers before ourselves.
• 44:57
  That includes the the children, their parents, and their whole families. You know, we're putting their best interests in our hearts. And so that would be the the advice that I would give is, like we said before, it's not if you're called to foster care. It's what area of foster care you're called to. And when you identify that, leap in with the heart of Jesus, who never chose comfort and always chose others before himself.
• 45:31
  Makyna Hart: Yeah. I echo I echo all of that. I do I I validate that, it can be an uneasy feeling thinking about going into foster care, into all the unknowns, into the hard parts, and sacrificing that that comfort and that that knowing of this is what my family looks like. This is where we're going. I validate that.
• 45:56
  But I think that, like you like you were saying, I think that the best life that God could have for us, it it relies on us being in a position of being totally dependent on him. And so I'm constantly examining my life of, like, are there any areas that aren't dependent on him? Like, I I don't know. I just think it's an exciting way to live. Just complete dependence and reliance.
• 46:25
  If if he doesn't do it, if he doesn't come through, like, it's not happening, I can't do it. I think that's very exciting. Just expands me as a person. And so I would say, you know, just examine your heart and see if this is a place you could be calling you to just live in total dependence and depend on him in a new way. And, reach out to Lifeline.
• 46:51
  Talk to a foster parent if you know one. If you don't, find me. I will talk to you. I will validate you, and I will I will walk with you, through, you know, what this could look like. But it it may not be, being a foster parent.
• 47:07
  It may be respite. It may be just caring for other foster parents who are in it around you. But you do have a role. And and then it's it's an exciting one, and God is in it, and he'll lead you, and he will show you, and you'll hear his voice like never before. And, yeah.
• 47:25
  You're you're needed on the team. You're needed and I I want you and I wanna do this with you. That's what I would say.
• 47:33
  Matthew Hart: And I would just wanna add, in Romans, it says to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice. This is a this is such a practical way to do that. You know, sometimes there's thing things in scripture that we're like, how do we walk that out? But this is such a this is such an easy way to walk out that scripture because when you're excuse me. When you are opening your home, there's a sacrifice there.
• 47:56
  You know, the sacrifice of like we said before, comfort and ease. And, you can you can live out scripture by doing this off your bodies as a living sacrifice.
• 48:08
  Dr. Rick Morton: Wow. Thank you all so much. We just are humbled by the opportunity to be able to serve with you. And and, you know, I think the the next time we're discouraged, Ervie, we're gonna call you too. Because I'm just like pumped up.
• 48:28
  I'm ready to I'm ready to go. You know, I'm ready to go tackle something hard and and do it for the glory of the Lord. And so, McKenna, Matt, thank you so much. Thank you. And we just appreciate the opportunity to be able to serve alongside y'all.
• 48:45
  And, and we want to say to y'all, to all of you that are listening to the Defender podcast that we're, we're grateful that you have listened, that you spent time with us. We ask you to pray for us and for all the folks that we have an opportunity to serve alongside during this National Foster Care Month, that we would be able to make the gospel known through, through the way that we engage in all kinds of ways around the foster care system. And so we're we're super thankful for the opportunity to meet with you here again this week. We'll be right back here again next week for another edition of the Defender podcast. And until that time, we just pray that, that you'll be attentive to ways that the Lord wants you to open your life to vulnerable children and vulnerable families for His glory.
• 49:36
  And so we'll see you next week.
• 49:41
  Herbie Newell: Thanks for listening to the Defender Podcast. If you enjoy making this podcast a part of your weekly routine, we'd love for you to take a moment to subscribe, rate, and review the Defender podcast to make it easier for more people to find. For more information on how you and your church can partner with Lifeline, visit us at lifelinechild.org. If you want to connect with me, please visit herbynewell.com. Follow us at Lifeline on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter by searching for Lifeline Child.
• 50:08
  You can email us directly at info at lifelinechild.org. Beloved, will you allow god to use the gospel to you to impact the life of a child? Please contact us because we are here to defend the fatherless. We'll see you again next week for the Defender podcast.