Latest / High n' Dry Podcast / Episode 6. Baby Hitler? & Achilles vs. Geralt of Rivia

Transcript

Episode 6. Baby Hitler? & Achilles vs. Geralt of Rivia · High n' Dry Podcast

0:15
SPEAKER_02: Hello tree.
0:16
SPEAKER_01: Fuck this tree.
0:17
SPEAKER_01: Fuck this tree.
0:18
SPEAKER_01: Ah shit.
0:19
SPEAKER_01: You ready to do this?
0:20
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, let's do it.
0:21
SPEAKER_01: Alright, hello out there.
0:22
SPEAKER_01: Welcome to High and Dry.
0:23
SPEAKER_01: I'm Ryan Barron North, and thank you for joining me as I scream into the void.
0:27
SPEAKER_01: With me as always, web developer and cannabis enthusiast James Crosslin.
0:32
SPEAKER_01: How are you doing today, James?
0:34
SPEAKER_02: I'm doing great, Ryan.
0:35
SPEAKER_02: Thanks for having me on the show for the sixth time in a row.
0:40
SPEAKER_01: Alright, so today, after our moralemma, we're going to be talking about Achilles of the Iliad by Homer, and he's going up against Geralt of Rivia from the uh Witcher series by Andre Sapkowski.
0:51
SPEAKER_01: Um, both characters, uh, the first one portrayed by Brad Pitt.
0:55
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, Brad Pitt, that's my man.
0:58
SPEAKER_01: See, me myself, I'm more of a Henry Cavill kind of guy.
1:01
SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
1:02
SPEAKER_02: Henry Cavill is uh he's a big hunk of man-meat, too.
1:06
SPEAKER_01: So today on the battle of the man-meat.
1:09
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, two beautiful men duking it out.
1:12
SPEAKER_01: It's art, you monkeys.
1:17
SPEAKER_01: Well, let's jump right into it.
1:19
SPEAKER_01: So, for those of you who are new to the show, we start off with our moral dilemma.
1:24
SPEAKER_01: And uh before we do that, we gotta get drunk and high.
1:28
SPEAKER_01: So, James, um, what will you be smoking today without giving any brand names away?
1:34
SPEAKER_02: Yes, and you know what?
1:35
SPEAKER_02: I thought I'd do a little primer real quick.
1:37
SPEAKER_02: We'll we'll get through it quickly.
1:38
SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna give you the strain name.
1:40
SPEAKER_02: Strains are uh are how weed is categorized.
1:44
SPEAKER_02: They're kind of like different kinds of apples, you know, gala, fuji, uh, Macintosh.
1:49
SPEAKER_02: You get different flavors from your weed, they have different effects.
1:52
SPEAKER_02: Stay away from that booze, you're not ready yet.
1:54
SPEAKER_02: Here he is trying to sip over here.
1:57
SPEAKER_02: You'll have it soon.
1:59
SPEAKER_01: It's a little bit take the edge off.
2:02
SPEAKER_02: So uh so I'm gonna be today.
2:04
SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna be uh the strain I'm smoking is called bellini.
2:08
SPEAKER_02: It's kind of like a peach bellini.
2:10
SPEAKER_02: I assume it's gonna be pretty peachy.
2:11
SPEAKER_02: That's what I heard.
2:12
SPEAKER_02: Oh, and what are you drinking?
2:13
SPEAKER_01: I will be drinking vodka and hanging out in my freezer.
2:18
SPEAKER_01: Very cold.
2:19
SPEAKER_02: Nice.
2:20
SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
2:20
SPEAKER_02: You're eager to get to it.
2:22
SPEAKER_01: I I am, I am actually.
2:24
SPEAKER_01: And I will be chasing it with a Moscow mule, which traditionally is your vodka, your ginger beer, and your lime.
2:31
SPEAKER_01: I didn't have any limes.
2:33
SPEAKER_02: Oh man, I could have brought you a lime.
2:35
SPEAKER_02: I wish you did.
2:36
SPEAKER_01: So right now it's just ginger beer and vodka, but uh I will be uh chasing my vodka with ginger beer and vodka.
2:44
SPEAKER_01: All right.
2:45
SPEAKER_01: You don't do a podcast like this if everything's going great, all right?
2:48
SPEAKER_01: So let's do it.
2:50
SPEAKER_01: All right, so here's that uh OG Oh that was nice.
2:54
SPEAKER_02: That's gonna be a good sound effect.
2:56
SPEAKER_01: Boom.
2:57
SPEAKER_01: All right, so here's that first shot and first uh hit hit.
3:02
SPEAKER_01: Let's do it.
3:10
SPEAKER_02: Easier than last week.
3:13
SPEAKER_02: Oh my god.
3:14
SPEAKER_02: That tastes so much like a peach bellini.
3:17
SPEAKER_00: Really?
3:18
SPEAKER_02: It's it's wonderful.
3:20
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, mine just tastes like battery acid.
3:23
SPEAKER_02: That's vodka.
3:24
SPEAKER_00: Yep, it mixes with anything.
3:26
SPEAKER_02: And let's hammer through this really quick because I know we got a lot to uh I know we got a lot to get through.
3:31
SPEAKER_02: Let's get these second hits and shots in.
3:33
SPEAKER_01: All right, round two.
3:38
SPEAKER_01: Oh boy.
3:42
SPEAKER_01: Smooth.
3:43
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
3:44
SPEAKER_01: I feel you.
3:45
SPEAKER_01: All right, what's this third one to?
3:47
SPEAKER_02: This third one is to we just had our 100th download.
3:52
SPEAKER_01: All right.
3:52
SPEAKER_02: Congratulations to us and congratulations to all our viewers on getting to participate in such a wonderful podcast experience provided by us.
4:01
SPEAKER_00: And that's why we're bringing this man meet match to you.
4:04
SPEAKER_00: We know what our viewers want.
4:06
SPEAKER_02: That's right.
4:06
SPEAKER_02: Let's do it.
4:09
SPEAKER_00: All right.
4:10
SPEAKER_00: Oh, that is enough of that.
4:13
SPEAKER_02: I took a double on that one.
4:17
SPEAKER_00: Oh just gotta breathe through that.
4:21
SPEAKER_01: So now I I want to be clear to the viewers at home that this is not staged.
4:27
SPEAKER_02: No, this isn't staged.
4:29
SPEAKER_02: Last week I can see how some people might think we talked about it beforehand because we uh because we said it would be surprising, but we both knew that it would be surprising going in before we talked about it.
4:41
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
4:41
SPEAKER_02: Because we because we're both big Futurama fans, and we kind of had an idea about Hubert Farnsworth and how he was like under underconsidered a lot of the time.
4:53
SPEAKER_03: I yes.
4:53
SPEAKER_02: But this one going in, we haven't discussed anything beforehand.
4:57
SPEAKER_02: We get super fucked up and let's let it rip.
5:01
SPEAKER_01: No, and and again, I would like to reiterate just the fucked up part.
5:05
SPEAKER_01: That all just happened.
5:07
SPEAKER_02: It all just happened, and we come in mostly sober and we leave definitely fucked up.
5:13
SPEAKER_01: So I came in sipping on a Moscow mule, just a light little sip of it, you know, nothing crazy.
5:20
SPEAKER_02: I took a hit when I was coding earlier.
5:22
SPEAKER_02: If you saw my Twitch stream, you'll know I wasn't totally sober coming in.
5:26
SPEAKER_01: But you It's just enough to keep the demons away.
5:28
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that's exactly right.
5:29
SPEAKER_02: The coding demons that haunt my dreams.
5:34
SPEAKER_01: All right, so let's jump into our dilemma today.
5:36
SPEAKER_01: It's a pretty easy dilemma.
5:39
SPEAKER_01: I mean, in the regard that a lot of people have heard of this one.
5:42
SPEAKER_01: Sure.
5:43
SPEAKER_01: Um, we're gonna be talking about baby Hitler.
5:45
SPEAKER_02: Oh, baby Hitler, the my favorite Hitler.
5:49
SPEAKER_02: Easily my favorite Hitler.
5:51
SPEAKER_02: Well, uh, he's kind of tied with Dead Hitler.
5:53
SPEAKER_01: Well, I liked when he was angsty painting Hitler.
5:56
SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah, he was your favorite Hitler?
5:58
SPEAKER_01: He was that with the wispy Hitler stash.
6:01
SPEAKER_02: Hadn't quite come in yet.
6:03
SPEAKER_01: Oh my god, what have I been like?
6:06
SPEAKER_01: All right, so Baby Hitler.
6:08
SPEAKER_02: Um that's the real question here is who do you like more, baby Hitler or Dead Hitler?
6:12
SPEAKER_02: Baby Hitler or Dead Hitler.
6:13
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, no, I mean, I'm looking at this uh public domain image of Baby Hitler.
6:19
SPEAKER_01: He seems very unassumed.
6:20
SPEAKER_01: Well, honestly.
6:21
SPEAKER_01: Well, most babies are unassuming, but he's got this bowl cut going on.
6:25
SPEAKER_01: Oof.
6:26
SPEAKER_01: And he's like, there's something in his eyes.
6:27
SPEAKER_01: Like he's questioning something, but it's something he shouldn't be questioning.
6:32
SPEAKER_02: So is so is the question on this one, do we kill baby Hitler?
6:35
SPEAKER_02: I assume that's the question.
6:37
SPEAKER_01: That's that's the easy assumption of it.
6:39
SPEAKER_01: So the the thing this was actually originally, I doubt there's no way it was originally done this way, but it was published in 2015 before the problem started.
6:49
SPEAKER_01: Um, in New York Times, they asked their readers, would you go back in time and kill baby Hitler?
6:55
SPEAKER_01: So the question is: suppose there's a scientist, he invents a time machine, and you're sent back to May 1889 to Austria a month earlier.
7:05
SPEAKER_01: So this is month-old baby Hitler.
7:08
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
7:08
SPEAKER_01: Child's been born given the name of Adolf by his parents, Aloy and Clara Hitler.
7:13
SPEAKER_02: Uh-huh.
7:13
SPEAKER_01: You know who he is, you know what he's done.
7:15
SPEAKER_01: For some reason, you're alone in his nursery.
7:18
SPEAKER_02: Oh, Hitler's done bad things.
7:20
SPEAKER_02: This is the first time hearing of it.
7:23
SPEAKER_02: Our public school system has failed me.
7:25
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
7:27
SPEAKER_01: That's a whole nother topic.
7:29
SPEAKER_01: There's been some stuff lately.
7:31
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
7:32
SPEAKER_01: So for those of you, we don't bring it up as much as we did in the first one, but we are based out of North Las Vegas, and we are in, I mean, I think this year they scored 49th on public school system.
7:44
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it's pretty bad.
7:45
SPEAKER_01: But they've been running the worst for a long time now.
7:47
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, it's really tough.
7:49
SPEAKER_02: Uh, my wife uh used to be a teacher, and the the environment is just so rough on the teachers that they really can't, there's not much they can do other than try to control behavior because she had in some of her classes, she had over 40 kids in a class.
8:09
SPEAKER_02: Over 40 middle middle schoolers.
8:11
SPEAKER_02: How do you teach them history?
8:13
SPEAKER_01: Well, so I'm asking history.
8:15
SPEAKER_01: How are you supposed to teach 40 kids who are just all they're thinking about is being teenagers?
8:20
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
8:20
SPEAKER_01: How do you teach them to deal cards or serve drinks or take off their clothes?
8:27
SPEAKER_01: You just you can't.
8:28
SPEAKER_01: You can't do that to all 40 students.
8:31
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that's true.
8:32
SPEAKER_02: You know, the get you know, the gambling classes, they were prioritized, they got them cut down.
8:37
SPEAKER_02: They were that was but really uh honestly, another thing they do is for for core classes like like science and math, they have reduced class sizes.
8:48
SPEAKER_02: But but something like history that is so incredibly important as we've seen, the fact that people seem to be forgetting history, yeah, uh that has been deprioritized by our society.
9:02
SPEAKER_01: Well, especially at this point, there's so little that is truly unprecedented.
9:07
SPEAKER_01: The only thing at this point in our history that's unprecedented is the rate of technological advancement.
9:13
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
9:13
SPEAKER_01: Beyond that, though, we've hit this all before.
9:16
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
9:16
SPEAKER_01: We're in the middle of a plague.
9:17
SPEAKER_01: Guess what?
9:18
SPEAKER_01: It's happened before.
9:19
SPEAKER_02: Guess what?
9:20
SPEAKER_02: Fascism was born out of a plague, also.
9:22
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it's happened before, but uh we choose not to really.
9:27
SPEAKER_02: I mean, which we history is not prioritized in our society.
9:31
SPEAKER_02: We we want people to be good workers and we want them to advance whatever field they go to, but we don't want them to remember the past because uh the past fucking sucked, and the people in charge are the kind of people who made it suck a lot of the time.
9:47
SPEAKER_01: Well, I think one of the first lessons you learn as just a person is if you touch the stove and it's hot, you don't touch it again.
9:53
SPEAKER_01: And history is how we stop touching the stove.
9:55
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, but but no one everyone keeps hiding their hand scars so the next person touches it.
10:01
SPEAKER_01: Exactly.
10:02
SPEAKER_01: So, anyway, let's talk about Hitler.
10:06
SPEAKER_02: We'll put that in a little aside.
10:08
SPEAKER_02: We'll add it, well, it'll that'll be extra content.
10:10
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
10:11
SPEAKER_01: When uh we have a oh boy.
10:14
SPEAKER_01: So baby Hitler.
10:16
SPEAKER_01: You so all right, you've traveled back to 1889, you're alone in Adolf's nursery for whatever reason.
10:24
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and you now are.
10:27
SPEAKER_01: Do you smother baby Hitler?
10:30
SPEAKER_01: Or do you kick him out of the window?
10:34
SPEAKER_01: Do you kill him or you do not kill him?
10:35
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that's the uh all right.
10:39
SPEAKER_01: So baby Hitler.
10:40
SPEAKER_01: What are you James?
10:41
SPEAKER_01: Initial thoughts.
10:41
SPEAKER_01: You killing Hitler?
10:43
SPEAKER_02: Uh so yes, I am killing baby Hitler.
10:46
SPEAKER_02: And I think the big argument against this for a lot of people is that they don't want to be a baby killer.
10:51
SPEAKER_02: You know, I don't want to have killed a baby.
10:54
SPEAKER_02: And that's a that's a very understandable point of view.
10:58
SPEAKER_01: Um well, so it's interesting that in the New York Times article, the end of it, it came out that 42% said yes, they would kill baby eight off.
11:08
SPEAKER_01: 30% said no.
11:10
SPEAKER_01: Um, and then 28 just couldn't come up with an answer.
11:13
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
11:14
SPEAKER_01: Which is pretty much the same at that point as saying no, you eventually walk out of the nursery.
11:18
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
11:18
SPEAKER_02: No, you just stand dumbfounded forever in one spot, uh following Hitler through his life, just standing behind him, like, I don't know.
11:27
SPEAKER_02: Should I kill him?
11:27
SPEAKER_01: He's getting kind of old.
11:28
SPEAKER_01: It's getting a little hard to kill.
11:30
SPEAKER_02: You get promoted up the working out.
11:32
SPEAKER_02: You get promoted up the ranks of the Reich, and your name is Joseph Goebbels.
11:37
SPEAKER_02: Time traveler Goebbels.
11:39
SPEAKER_01: That's why in every picture of uh Hitler and Goebbels, he looks just so at war with himself.
11:46
SPEAKER_02: I don't know what's going on.
11:48
SPEAKER_01: I've been back here now for 30 years.
11:52
SPEAKER_02: I would say I understand those people's point of view.
11:55
SPEAKER_02: Maybe I could kidnap him.
11:57
SPEAKER_02: Am I allowed to kidnap baby Hitler and stay in the past and dedicate myself to well before we get into those side bars, you gotta go with the So if I could only kill him or leave him alone, yeah, I would kill him.
12:10
SPEAKER_02: Yes, I'd kill him.
12:11
SPEAKER_01: Well, give me the why.
12:13
SPEAKER_02: The why is because in the future, something like eight million Jews and seven million other pe you know, marginalized, disenfranchised people were systematically exterminated because this man rose to power.
12:34
SPEAKER_02: Weighing this one personally, weighing weighing the guilt I will feel about killing a baby and against the weighing the guilt of killing this baby against those lives seems like uh a no-brainer to me.
12:52
SPEAKER_02: It seems like the for sure I will prevent Hitler rising to power.
12:58
SPEAKER_02: I don't know if that means like if if the timeline changes and someone else comes to power in Hitler's place, who fucking knows?
13:06
SPEAKER_02: But what I do know is that something will change.
13:11
SPEAKER_02: Of course.
13:12
SPEAKER_02: And it's probably not gonna change for the worse.
13:15
SPEAKER_02: It's probably not gonna change for the worse.
13:18
SPEAKER_02: What do you think?
13:19
SPEAKER_01: Well, so just off the cuff, my answer to it, I'm in baby Hitler's nursery.
13:26
SPEAKER_01: You know, granted, I'm gonna get back home, and you know, JK Rowling is being sworn in as Emperor of the Moon.
13:37
SPEAKER_01: But that may be, but I uh me personally, I don't have access to that.
13:42
SPEAKER_01: I only know that right now I have the chance.
13:46
SPEAKER_01: I think back to a uh well, I mean, I've read like um Ellie Weasels or Wisell.
13:51
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, Wisell.
13:52
SPEAKER_01: His his his novels.
13:53
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, Ellie Wisell is a great novel.
13:55
SPEAKER_01: Um, and I think um I think about if he won an inscription that they found etched into the wall just about the the non-existence of God because of the things that were going on there.
14:07
SPEAKER_01: And I I I think about all that sort of thing.
14:10
SPEAKER_01: I mean, just the horrible, horrible things that occurred there, and I had no other choice.
14:15
SPEAKER_01: It looks like I'm about to punt this baby, which brings me back to this the secondary question.
14:20
SPEAKER_01: I'm taking him out the window.
14:24
SPEAKER_01: Oh man.
14:25
SPEAKER_01: But then I also think that that brings uh because we're we're talking a lot about how it's gonna change things, um, and there's so it it kind of comes back to that concept of past regret sort of situation.
14:39
SPEAKER_01: But I think at the end of the day, though, we're both gonna kill Hitler.
14:41
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
14:42
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, both of us.
14:43
SPEAKER_02: We're I think we're pretty like-minded on this one.
14:45
SPEAKER_02: And I may have to kill myself after if I can't deal with it, but that is worth possibly saving all those people.
14:55
SPEAKER_02: If I'm put in a position where I could possibly save all those people with my action, if I could possibly, if there's even the slightest possibility that I could save 14 million or more people, and all those Russians who just threw their fucking bodies at Hitler, you know, if I could save all those people who died in World War II, I'm H.
15:18
SPEAKER_02: Even just a possibility, sliver of a chance, I'm fucking taking it.
15:21
SPEAKER_01: Well, but it then it does also bring us back just that whole concept of you're gonna change time, and it brings us back to the burning of your hand on the stove.
15:32
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
15:32
SPEAKER_01: So that situation, Hitler, was us burning our hand on the proverbial stove.
15:38
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
15:39
SPEAKER_01: Do we take away that touching the stove?
15:42
SPEAKER_02: Oh, that's an interesting question.
15:43
SPEAKER_02: Uh, I would say yes.
15:45
SPEAKER_02: I would say absolutely yes, uh, because it didn't seem to make a fucking difference.
15:53
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
15:53
SPEAKER_02: It it didn't seem to make a fucking difference that we touched the stove.
15:57
SPEAKER_01: Perhaps um No, because it definitely seemed it's like uh it's like fashion.
16:02
SPEAKER_01: You know, you always as far as um uh cultural sentiment goes and how willing they are to accept nationalism, yeah.
16:11
SPEAKER_01: Um it's it's like fashion trends.
16:13
SPEAKER_01: Like I was at uh Target last night and I saw women walking around like they were backup dancers in an MC Hammer video.
16:21
SPEAKER_02: Um yeah, that loop.
16:23
SPEAKER_02: We're back in the 90s again.
16:24
SPEAKER_02: The the photo we're gonna the promo photo we're posting, I look like I'm from 2001.
16:29
SPEAKER_02: You can it was just the clothes I had.
16:32
SPEAKER_01: And so is is that what history is?
16:34
SPEAKER_01: Are we just is that what we're gonna be?
16:36
SPEAKER_01: We're gonna be in a constant cycle.
16:38
SPEAKER_02: Uh yeah, maybe there maybe there's a way to break the cycle, but you know what?
16:44
SPEAKER_02: It didn't fucking help uh to touch that stove.
16:47
SPEAKER_02: We already got people who have risen to the highest power in our country who believe very similar things to the Nazis.
16:55
SPEAKER_02: They just try to hide it behind behind hide it behind nationalism.
16:59
SPEAKER_02: And I think that uh maybe my my sacrifice will change something for good.
17:06
SPEAKER_01: We do tend to come back to more internalized So I cannot change what happens after I kill Baby Hitler.
17:15
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
17:15
SPEAKER_01: All I have is the knowledge that by killing Baby Hitler, those people will not have to go through what they went through.
17:24
SPEAKER_02: Well, you don't know that you can't continue to change things.
17:27
SPEAKER_02: Like, do we have to go back?
17:28
SPEAKER_02: Maybe you can just kill all the Nazi kill all the Nazis.
17:31
SPEAKER_01: I'm just gonna keep on going.
17:32
SPEAKER_02: Just keep finding all the babies, like getting them when they're unprotected.
17:35
SPEAKER_01: There's Which brings us back to our Ezio episode, in which all we're trying to do is get ourselves a group of knife wielding baby killers?
17:49
SPEAKER_01: Jesus Christ.
17:51
SPEAKER_01: What is this podcast?
17:53
SPEAKER_02: I don't know, but apparently, well, you know, we've had two anti-baby segments in the past.
17:59
SPEAKER_01: Do we just listen to high and dry just not like babies?
18:01
SPEAKER_02: I don't know.
18:02
SPEAKER_02: I I mean I hope to have some in the near future, but hopefully they're not little Hitlers.
18:06
SPEAKER_01: Well, so I was working with a mentor during my time in Kuwait.
18:11
SPEAKER_01: Um, and what we discussed a lot of was past guilt um and given the ability to go back and change something.
18:21
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
18:22
SPEAKER_01: And in the on the personal level, that ability to go back and change something you find is merely just kicking the can down the road.
18:31
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
18:32
SPEAKER_01: Like everything has to be dealt with.
18:36
SPEAKER_01: So those nationalistic sentiments that were occurring in the 30s had to be dealt with.
18:44
SPEAKER_02: Um that's true.
18:45
SPEAKER_02: So the the conditions that bred Hitler were uh were there without Hitler.
18:52
SPEAKER_00: Yes.
18:53
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
18:53
SPEAKER_02: This is also an argument for the known, the known pain you'll have to face and the unknown pain you'll have to face.
19:01
SPEAKER_03: Yes.
19:01
SPEAKER_02: And I've always been against choosing the known pain.
19:05
SPEAKER_02: I've always been against that.
19:06
SPEAKER_02: I've I've always felt like making that assumption that it will be worse on the other side once you do something.
19:13
SPEAKER_01: The grass is always shittier.
19:14
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, the grass is always shittier on the other side.
19:16
SPEAKER_02: That's a yeah, that's an opinion.
19:18
SPEAKER_02: It's a very cynical opinion that uh that I find myself slipping into sometimes.
19:23
SPEAKER_01: So well then so then final thought then.
19:26
SPEAKER_01: Um you you've stated multiple times now that you are in fact going, are you well are you gonna smother or kick baby Hitler?
19:32
SPEAKER_02: Ugh, I'd probably break his baby neck and try to that's probably the fat that's probably the best way.
19:39
SPEAKER_01: He's just like a goose and you spin him.
19:41
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that's well sorry, the Thanksgiving's coming, so like a turkey.
19:44
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
19:44
SPEAKER_02: Um, I thanks for thanks for picking this one and making an entire segment about killing babies.
19:52
SPEAKER_01: Baby Hitler.
19:53
SPEAKER_01: That is an important distinction.
19:55
SPEAKER_02: It is an important distinction.
19:56
SPEAKER_02: I think he kills himself later, so it's okay.
19:59
SPEAKER_02: If I could if I could kidnap and raise him, I would.
20:02
SPEAKER_02: I would st I would dedicate my entire life to raising him, right?
20:05
SPEAKER_02: To raising him correctly.
20:08
SPEAKER_01: I know there's there's a lot to talk about there, and I feel every week we get closer and closer just to moving on to that first part of the podcast.
20:18
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
20:18
SPEAKER_01: We should just have a whole podcast for that first part.
20:21
SPEAKER_01: We'll we'll we'll do that for I don't know, Thanksgiving or some shit like that.
20:24
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
20:25
SPEAKER_01: Um, but before so I've been drinking this meal.
20:28
SPEAKER_01: I'm almost out of this meal.
20:32
SPEAKER_01: So let's talk about the second part of this podcast.
20:34
SPEAKER_01: Uh thing everyone's been waiting for.
20:36
SPEAKER_01: This man meat of a fight.
20:37
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
20:39
SPEAKER_02: No, I forgot about those two mustonises.
20:43
SPEAKER_01: Brad Pitt and Henry Cavill just pounding it out.
20:49
SPEAKER_01: Oh my god.
20:50
SPEAKER_01: You know, guys are gonna at you both in the uh promos here.
20:54
SPEAKER_01: So yeah, come at me, bro.
20:57
SPEAKER_02: No, these uh Cadillacs of men, these gods among men, these burly.
21:05
SPEAKER_01: But anyway, so what are we talking about?
21:08
SPEAKER_01: Jesus, my my head's all fuzzy.
21:11
SPEAKER_02: What are we even doing?
21:13
SPEAKER_01: What are we doing here?
21:15
SPEAKER_02: So the first round, they just get in a ring and they beat the shit out of each other.
21:22
SPEAKER_02: So we got Brad Pitt, lithe, small, sinewy.
21:27
SPEAKER_02: He is, he's very sinewy, and we see how he moves in in the film Troy.
21:34
SPEAKER_02: Uh, Achilles, if we're going back to the Greek myths, was someone who was unparalleled in fighting.
21:41
SPEAKER_01: He but well, before we before we talk about what they're capable of, so for the bookmark portion of it, here we are.
21:48
SPEAKER_01: Welcome to the second part of High and Dry Podcast.
21:51
SPEAKER_01: The thing you clicked for, because this is pretty much what we advertise.
21:54
SPEAKER_01: We have our two godlike figures of men coming at each other.
22:01
SPEAKER_01: On this episode, we have Achilles from the Iliad, Homer portrayed by Brad Pitt.
22:09
SPEAKER_01: Um, for the sake of this argument, he's gonna be able to take on mythology and the things that mythology offers.
22:15
SPEAKER_01: Him versus Geralt of Rivia, the starring character of the Witcher series of novels and short stories by Polish writer Andrzej Sipkowski.
22:27
SPEAKER_01: Um, and the two of them, and in this version, of course, he's portrayed by Henry Cavill, the current it boy.
22:33
SPEAKER_02: You know, I really like Henry Cavill a lot.
22:35
SPEAKER_02: I do too.
22:36
SPEAKER_02: He seems like a good guy.
22:37
SPEAKER_01: I do too.
22:38
SPEAKER_02: I'm sure something will come out.
22:39
SPEAKER_02: Who knows?
22:40
SPEAKER_01: Yep.
22:40
SPEAKER_01: Yep, yep, yep.
22:42
SPEAKER_01: Uh I really hope.
22:43
SPEAKER_01: All he does is fucking paint Warcraft miniatures, build computers, and yeah.
22:48
SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah, he built that computer.
22:49
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I remember that.
22:50
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I remember that.
22:50
SPEAKER_02: Anyway, cool guy.
22:51
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, cool guy.
22:52
SPEAKER_01: Cool guy, Henry.
22:53
SPEAKER_01: Achilles versus Geralt of Rivia.
22:56
SPEAKER_01: Let's get it out.
22:57
SPEAKER_01: Round one is within our patented method, is the two characters take off their shirts and get in the ring.
23:06
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and no belts either.
23:08
SPEAKER_01: No belts either.
23:09
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, so what happens here is they both come in uh only with what they have innately.
23:15
SPEAKER_02: They don't have any other weapons.
23:17
SPEAKER_02: They're just it's like a boxing ring or a UFC match, I guess, is more like it because they can use different fighting styles.
23:23
SPEAKER_02: So they get in like this mixed martial arts competition to a cheering crowd.
23:27
SPEAKER_01: We we get the stats on them.
23:29
SPEAKER_01: Um earlier this week, we snuck into both Brad Pitt and Henry Cavill's home to get a wingspan measurement.
23:37
SPEAKER_02: We weighed them.
23:39
SPEAKER_01: We have a scale, we roll them onto it.
23:43
SPEAKER_02: It's a winch system, like how they wake up.
23:45
SPEAKER_01: It allows them to sleep peacefully through the process.
23:48
SPEAKER_01: It is a very, it's a very peaceful, very humane method to measuring these actors.
23:56
SPEAKER_01: And then we release them back into the wild.
24:00
SPEAKER_02: Just wake up on set, like oh shit, high and dry got me.
24:06
SPEAKER_01: He's got a tag in his ear, says high and dry on the scene.
24:11
SPEAKER_01: Fuckers.
24:13
SPEAKER_01: Um we got we've already gotten Carl Urban.
24:16
SPEAKER_01: Um, he knows.
24:18
SPEAKER_01: Um, but anyway, so let's get down.
24:20
SPEAKER_01: Uh we'll talk about round two and three in a minute.
24:22
SPEAKER_01: So let's get down to round one.
24:24
SPEAKER_01: These two fighters, who's gonna take it?
24:26
SPEAKER_02: Tell me about Geralt first.
24:27
SPEAKER_02: You know more about Geralt Aruvia.
24:29
SPEAKER_02: Go ahead and tell me what he's got going for him in this first round.
24:32
SPEAKER_01: All right, so Geralt Arivia, first off, um, he's a mutant.
24:36
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
24:36
SPEAKER_01: Um, which I always found to be so the Witcher series is very Germanic in its storytelling, and it pulls much from like those princesses locked in towers.
24:47
SPEAKER_01: Grim.
24:47
SPEAKER_01: Very grim fairy tale, werewolves, and this and that.
24:51
SPEAKER_01: Um, and the break from that is mutants.
24:55
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
24:55
SPEAKER_01: Um, and that may well be translated differently in Polish.
25:00
SPEAKER_01: Um, but as far as the Western reading of it is concerned, mutant.
25:06
SPEAKER_01: And so it's a mutant warrior who's taken off to this faraway training ground where he is subjected to alchemical means which mutate the young boy.
25:19
SPEAKER_01: Most of them don't survive.
25:21
SPEAKER_02: Fucked up by mad science is a pretty hard backstory.
25:24
SPEAKER_01: Yes, so they have that very grim backstory.
25:27
SPEAKER_01: Most like, for example, so the abilities of a witcher, you have the cat-like eyes, uh-huh, um, which you can you can definitely see in the series whenever you look at Geralt in the face.
25:37
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
25:38
SPEAKER_01: And you have, and that, for example, that mutation, it blinds most of the boys who try it.
25:45
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
25:45
SPEAKER_01: Um, additionally, you have a um longevity, uh-huh, their lifespan is extended.
25:51
SPEAKER_01: Um, you have acute agility, you have super strength, you know, to a relative level.
25:57
SPEAKER_02: It's a pretty good set of powers.
25:59
SPEAKER_01: Yes, and but then on top of that, they're trained in very mundane, but a very utilitarian magic.
26:07
SPEAKER_02: Like, oh, it's like the Krav Magav magic.
26:09
SPEAKER_01: Krav Magav magic.
26:11
SPEAKER_01: So you like you have Yennefer, who we'll talk about later in a few other episodes.
26:14
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
26:14
SPEAKER_01: Hint Hint.
26:16
SPEAKER_01: She's able to do whatever the fuck she wants with magic.
26:19
SPEAKER_01: Geralt, on the other hand, it's very fireball for this guy, um, warding spell for this guy.
26:25
SPEAKER_01: It's very utilitarian, very I have a job to do.
26:29
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
26:29
SPEAKER_01: Um, so why don't you tell us about Achilles?
26:32
SPEAKER_02: So Achilles was a demigod.
26:36
SPEAKER_02: Uh Achilles was born of Thetis, who was a Nereid, and a human man who was Peleus.
26:44
SPEAKER_02: And uh part of his mythology is that he's been dipped in the river Styx and uh in an attempt to make him invulnerable, but his mom held him by his heel, and that part of him did not become invulnerable.
27:01
SPEAKER_02: So he's he's basically a he's he this left him with super stamina, um, super strength, super speed.
27:11
SPEAKER_02: Uh, he was considered like just a cut above the rest of the mortals.
27:17
SPEAKER_02: Like the way he moved and the way he fought and and the kind of things he could endure were beyond what a normal person could.
27:27
SPEAKER_01: Before we start a fight, uh it means it's time for our fourth shot and our fourth hit.
27:33
SPEAKER_01: Dude.
27:33
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I know.
27:34
SPEAKER_01: I almost forgot that fourth hit.
27:36
SPEAKER_01: This oh, you hear that?
27:38
SPEAKER_03: Oh, geez.
27:38
SPEAKER_01: Well, I'm gonna do that one more time for the people at home.
27:41
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
27:43
SPEAKER_01: The fourth one's the heart.
27:45
SPEAKER_02: I'm already so fucked up.
27:46
SPEAKER_01: This is Bellini, what a great one.
27:49
SPEAKER_01: Uh what I think it is a testament to is the Herculan stamina of members of High and Dry.
27:57
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, we're pretty awesome.
27:59
SPEAKER_02: We are pretty awesome.
28:00
SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna I'm gonna take that hit now.
28:02
SPEAKER_01: Here we go.
28:03
SPEAKER_01: Cheers.
28:04
SPEAKER_01: Um, this one's to uh Brad Pitt and Henry Cavill.
28:07
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, good on both of you for being in likable movies and television shows.
28:14
SPEAKER_02: Must be fucking nice.
28:15
SPEAKER_02: It's uh it's probably pretty nice.
28:17
SPEAKER_02: Good on them.
28:18
SPEAKER_02: They're able to deliver something people like.
28:20
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
28:21
SPEAKER_02: We're fans of we're fans of everyone on this show.
28:23
SPEAKER_02: Way to go on plea on way to go.
28:26
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, way to go on have given people something to enjoy.
28:29
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
28:30
SPEAKER_01: Uh so let's it's time to get into it.
28:31
SPEAKER_01: I think we win, round one.
28:33
SPEAKER_02: So I think that they are both they're both pretty good fighters.
28:39
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, no, right off the bat, I think they're good fighters.
28:42
SPEAKER_01: They both have uh supernal strength, agility, all that.
28:46
SPEAKER_01: So I think what takes it Achilles is invulnerable.
28:51
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that's a pretty tough one to beat, is that Achilles is invulnerable.
28:55
SPEAKER_02: So he's not totally invulnerable.
28:57
SPEAKER_02: He was wounded one time.
29:00
SPEAKER_02: I actually wrote a card.
29:02
SPEAKER_02: He was wounded one time.
29:04
SPEAKER_02: Uh, it was when the river god Scamander allowed Astropius to uh he guided Asteropius' spear, and because it was godly, it hurt him.
29:15
SPEAKER_02: Achilles can be hurt by gods.
29:19
SPEAKER_01: So he's like Superman who can be hurt by magic.
29:23
SPEAKER_02: Possibly.
29:23
SPEAKER_02: He's it's not magic, it's gods, which I think is a very big distinction.
29:28
SPEAKER_02: Like it has to be divine.
29:30
SPEAKER_01: Well, which in that case will cut out Geralt's ability to combat it.
29:36
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, because he did he he withstood the magic of uh like plenty of people, and he also when he wounds people, they don't heal.
29:47
SPEAKER_01: Please go on.
29:48
SPEAKER_02: When Achilles wounds someone, he can make sure that the wound doesn't heal until until they come to him and ask him to heal it.
29:57
SPEAKER_01: That is a compelling argument for Achilles.
30:00
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
30:00
SPEAKER_01: Well, so so Achilles has that invulnerability.
30:03
SPEAKER_01: They so they both have the supernal speed, strength, yeah, fighting prowess.
30:09
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
30:10
SPEAKER_01: Where that alters is Achilles' invulnerability.
30:16
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
30:16
SPEAKER_01: Geralt, the difference with him is he has his magics.
30:22
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, he has magic, which is really powerful.
30:24
SPEAKER_02: It's a great, it's a great skill to have.
30:27
SPEAKER_02: I just don't know if he would be able to hit the heel.
30:30
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I don't know if he'd be able to like because Achilles goes into this fight knowing his weakness.
30:36
SPEAKER_02: Uh, I just I just don't think it would happen.
30:40
SPEAKER_01: The well, it's interesting then that Achilles wears sandals.
30:44
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, Achilles wears sandals.
30:48
SPEAKER_01: It's time to develop a boot.
30:51
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, they didn't have boots back then.
30:54
SPEAKER_01: Um I would say now, so it's round two, is we'll get into in a second, is where they are then able to use their tactical prowess.
31:05
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
31:05
SPEAKER_01: So we'll discuss that there, but I think that first round one is safe to go to Achilles.
31:11
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I think that's a good thing.
31:12
SPEAKER_01: Garrett will have his magic and he'll have all the same things that Achilles have, has, but he will not know what to do with that invulnerability.
31:23
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
31:24
SPEAKER_01: Alright, well, so there's there's the agreement.
31:26
SPEAKER_01: So round one goes to Achilles of Homer is the Iliad.
31:31
SPEAKER_02: Way to go, represented by Brad Pitt.
31:33
SPEAKER_02: Represented by Brad Pitt.
31:35
SPEAKER_02: The most the most famous Achilles representation by far.
31:38
SPEAKER_01: I think what I'm most excited about with this podcast is being able to tag Brad Pitt and Henry Cavill.
31:44
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I'm so excited.
31:46
SPEAKER_01: Hopefully we hear back from them.
31:48
SPEAKER_01: Just just one person, if you could please just say hi back.
31:53
SPEAKER_02: Just say hi.
31:54
SPEAKER_02: Just say hi.
31:56
SPEAKER_02: Thanks for talking about me.
31:57
SPEAKER_02: I see what you're doing.
31:58
SPEAKER_02: I see you.
31:59
SPEAKER_02: All right.
32:00
SPEAKER_02: So Round two.
32:02
SPEAKER_02: Round two.
32:03
SPEAKER_02: Let's do it.
32:03
SPEAKER_01: So round two, it now pulls back into the City View, as we've decided to call it.
32:09
SPEAKER_01: Um the City View is where these characters now back up into a world that's at least similar to their own, or where you'd most anticipate the two characters meeting.
32:20
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
32:20
SPEAKER_01: And it allows them now to use their tactics, knowledge, um, and the scope of their equipment and abilities that are not innate.
32:31
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
32:31
SPEAKER_02: And I like this setting for them because it means that we get to imagine a town that is somewhere between ancient Greece and like medieval Britain.
32:43
SPEAKER_02: And like I guess medieval Poland.
32:47
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
32:47
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
32:47
SPEAKER_02: So somewhere between ancient Greece and Medieval Poland.
32:50
SPEAKER_02: And I really like the idea of that town.
32:53
SPEAKER_01: Two of them slamming into each other.
32:55
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I really like the idea of this.
32:57
SPEAKER_02: So we get to consider how they work on those two fronts.
33:01
SPEAKER_02: I think Geralt fights in in and near cities a lot more than Achilles does.
33:06
SPEAKER_02: I think Achilles places on an open battlefield.
33:08
SPEAKER_01: Well, so yeah, exactly.
33:10
SPEAKER_01: And the thing with Geralt is he'll go into a town.
33:14
SPEAKER_01: He's looking for work.
33:15
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
33:16
SPEAKER_01: Which is actually a huge similarity thematically between Achilles and Geralt.
33:21
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
33:22
SPEAKER_02: Um Achilles was a mercenary.
33:24
SPEAKER_01: Yes.
33:25
SPEAKER_02: In in the in the Troy version, he was a mercenary.
33:28
unknown: Yeah.
33:28
SPEAKER_01: Well, um, the thing with Geralt, though, is when he is on he's also an investigator.
33:35
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
33:35
SPEAKER_01: And when he goes into kill something or slay something, he comes in with this full breadth of knowledge.
33:42
SPEAKER_01: And then one would would Achilles make it into his scope of knowledge as as far as his weakness.
33:51
SPEAKER_02: So first off, I think giving Geralt uh a steel weapon that existed in the medieval ages, but did not exist in the time of Achilles.
34:01
SPEAKER_01: That's a fantastic point.
34:02
SPEAKER_02: Is a is a big deal.
34:04
SPEAKER_02: Um it's steel against bronze.
34:08
SPEAKER_02: Steel against bronze, but but also uh Achilles did have a set of armor from made by Hephaestus that was that was well argued over.
34:21
SPEAKER_02: So that would protect parts of his body, but of course it was in the Greek style.
34:26
SPEAKER_02: So you had greaves and you had a skirt.
34:29
SPEAKER_01: There's a whole there's a lot of places where Gerald would focus on, he'd quickly see that that armor isn't something that he should be trifling with, and he'd fuck with open revealed skin, such as like you'd have when you're wearing sandals.
34:44
SPEAKER_02: Yes, and do remember that historically steel is basically what killed polytheism in Europe.
34:51
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
34:51
SPEAKER_02: Um steel is what said, oh, the gods don't matter, basically.
34:56
SPEAKER_01: We have steel.
34:57
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, we have steel, and steel can change the will of gods.
35:01
SPEAKER_01: And society has been wrestling with that ever since.
35:05
SPEAKER_02: It sure has.
35:06
SPEAKER_02: Um so I think in this version, perhaps Steel does not obey the laws of uh of Achilles' vulnerability.
35:16
SPEAKER_01: Well, I feel at least in this, so his bronze weapons would quickly be undone.
35:21
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
35:22
SPEAKER_01: Which would leave Geralt magic and time, especially when he starts using his um his defensive magic, yes, like his trapping Achilles in a field, it would allow Geralt the ability to really get in there and test where I can kill in his mind this monster.
35:42
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
35:43
SPEAKER_02: And I like that.
35:47
SPEAKER_02: I like that take, but I think it has to be balanced against the idea that Geralt has a lot of fucking scars because he goes into things and gets a little fucked up and then comes back and takes them out.
35:58
SPEAKER_02: And Achilles, if you fuck up against him, you don't really have an opportunity to do it again.
36:03
SPEAKER_02: He he if he wounds you, you can't heal a wound from him.
36:08
SPEAKER_02: But I do think that Geralt um would be wounded and then and then still fight Achilles while wounded, and because of his magic and the advantage of planning against his weaknesses.
36:23
SPEAKER_01: Which brings into the fine which is sort of the key behind witchers is that they are apothecaries.
36:33
SPEAKER_01: They create poisons and rubs and very they use the plants around them to take these and that's part of that's the main portion of their mutation, is that they can take on things that would kill a normal person, yeah, but give grants them godlike abilities, okay.
36:54
SPEAKER_01: Such as fortitude, healing, granted, he's still not gonna heal that wound from Achilles.
37:00
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
37:00
SPEAKER_01: Um, he is granted those abilities from the potions that he's taken going into this battle.
37:07
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I agree.
37:08
SPEAKER_02: I I agree.
37:09
SPEAKER_02: I think in this situation, even though Achilles can wound uh without it healing, I think that it's part of the Witcher's story that he gets wounded and comes back.
37:19
SPEAKER_02: Achilles never has to deal with being wounded, he gets he gets wounded once in his whole life.
37:24
SPEAKER_01: Which we can go, which as Ty and Joy tends to do, we can go into the personal self-help version of that, but instead, I think we both stated it now.
37:33
SPEAKER_01: And correct me if I'm wrong, round two is gonna go to the Witcher, Geralt O'Rivio.
37:39
SPEAKER_02: You know, I do want to say we that does tie into our thing at the beginning.
37:43
SPEAKER_02: We once again tied in.
37:44
SPEAKER_01: It always comes back around.
37:45
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
37:46
SPEAKER_01: Guys, this isn't planned.
37:47
SPEAKER_01: I'm I'm drunk.
37:49
SPEAKER_01: He's high as a motherfucker.
37:51
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, because he was never wounded, he doesn't know how to deal with something that might hurt him.
37:56
SPEAKER_01: He never touched the stove.
37:58
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, health obviously has.
38:00
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, he's done it a bunch of times.
38:03
SPEAKER_01: So there it is.
38:04
SPEAKER_01: Geralt of Rivia.
38:06
SPEAKER_02: He brings experience.
38:07
SPEAKER_01: He brings experience and he brings tools that Achilles just has never seen before.
38:12
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
38:12
SPEAKER_01: Um, so there it is.
38:13
SPEAKER_01: Round two goes to Geralt of Rivia.
38:16
SPEAKER_01: He's moving on to round three.
38:17
SPEAKER_01: So round three is very similar to round two in the fact that it has the city view and it allows the characters to both use their mental acuity and to bring tactics to the field.
38:28
SPEAKER_01: However, this time both characters get to bring a second.
38:32
SPEAKER_01: This is their best bud who they get to bring in.
38:35
SPEAKER_01: And I feel um, like myself is the Witcher expert in this particular discussion, and yourself as the Achilles expert in this.
38:42
SPEAKER_01: I think we both have who we think they'd bring in.
38:46
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
38:46
SPEAKER_02: Why don't you go first?
38:48
SPEAKER_01: So, in my opinion, um, so I I think a lot of the listeners, their first thing is like, well, let's bring in Jennefer.
38:54
SPEAKER_01: And no, no, I don't think Geralt is going to bring Jennefer in.
38:57
SPEAKER_02: Jennifer is just as likely to betray him as help him.
39:02
SPEAKER_01: I mean, that's very true.
39:03
SPEAKER_01: It's it depends on in which point in the story that you catch them at because eventually the two of them are married.
39:09
SPEAKER_01: Uh-huh.
39:09
SPEAKER_01: Um, eventually the two of them are a couple.
39:12
SPEAKER_01: Um, spoiler alert.
39:13
SPEAKER_01: For those it's not a fucking spoiler.
39:15
SPEAKER_01: These books have been written since the 90s, but um, which is a huge benefit over Game of Thrones.
39:21
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that was coming out concurrently.
39:24
SPEAKER_02: What an issue there that they didn't get a full complete story.
39:27
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, we have those now.
39:28
SPEAKER_01: And at this point, Anja is just writing books for funsies to fill out his world.
39:33
SPEAKER_01: Um, but so eventually Jennifer and Geralt do get married.
39:37
SPEAKER_01: So Netflix viewers who don't know the books, there you go, enjoy.
39:41
SPEAKER_02: You have something to look forward to in these dark and trying times.
39:44
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and they do adopt essentially Siri.
39:47
SPEAKER_01: But anyway, anyway, uh not trying to get into that.
39:49
SPEAKER_01: So a lot of people are gonna say Jennifer, but no.
39:52
SPEAKER_01: First, Geralt isn't gonna just bring her into something that he knows can potentially, you know, if uh if she's there, great, but that's not who he's going to.
40:01
SPEAKER_01: Who's gonna be there though?
40:02
SPEAKER_01: Dandelion or Yaskir, however you choose to say it at the time.
40:07
SPEAKER_01: Um, Yaskir being the Polish word for dandelion.
40:11
SPEAKER_02: I like that.
40:12
SPEAKER_02: I didn't know that.
40:14
SPEAKER_01: Um, so there you go.
40:16
SPEAKER_01: So uh yeah, in my opinion, Yaskir is the one who's gonna be there.
40:20
SPEAKER_01: If if you played the games, he works through um different partners.
40:24
SPEAKER_01: He always has a different partner, whether that's Zoltir or whoever it happens to be.
40:28
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
40:28
SPEAKER_01: Um, but I think if we're going off of the Henry Cavill and just sort of taking the average of Geralt's partners, we're gonna see Yaskir next to him.
40:38
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
40:39
SPEAKER_02: He it's who he chooses to bring.
40:41
SPEAKER_01: It's who he chooses to bring along.
40:43
SPEAKER_01: Or who chooses him, especially Geralt being a loner.
40:46
SPEAKER_01: Um, he may have um I I've had too much vodka to remember the name, but he may have his teacher from Kermorn, um, who taught him to be a Witcher.
40:59
SPEAKER_01: But that's that that's also potentially unlikely.
41:03
SPEAKER_01: The person who's going to be available is definitely Yaskir.
41:06
SPEAKER_02: Yasker keeps him grounded.
41:07
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
41:08
SPEAKER_01: So given who's Achilles bringing?
41:10
SPEAKER_02: I thought about this quite a bit, and I thought uh maybe Patroclus.
41:15
SPEAKER_01: Which I think is the everyone's first thought.
41:17
SPEAKER_01: At least at least not people in Nevada, judging by the school system, but um I think everyone else's first thought was that that's who he's gonna bring.
41:26
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and I think uh I think that that's not right, because I think Achilles knows that if he he would need a battalion of men.
41:35
SPEAKER_02: That's where the Myrmidons they're the name of the Myrmidons, Achilles' group of people, it comes from the Greek word for ant, because they were like ant soldiers that would swarm.
41:47
SPEAKER_02: So he had trained his people to work in these like small group tactics that were incredibly effective, but he would need all those people.
41:56
SPEAKER_02: But if he's only bringing one friend, if he's only bringing one friend, it's just he's not gonna bring just another one of himself, he's gonna bring someone who he trusted, someone who he said was blessed by the gods for their cleverness.
42:11
SPEAKER_01: And I just finished my mule and I know who I think you're talking about.
42:15
SPEAKER_02: I think you would bring Odysseus.
42:16
SPEAKER_02: Odysseus has his own book written about him, and he very cleverly anticipates and overcomes several uh divine intelligences who are trying to manipulate or hurt him.
42:31
SPEAKER_01: Which and Yasgir is bringing a loot.
42:36
SPEAKER_02: Well, let's so so let's give him his teacher.
42:39
SPEAKER_02: You know, I don't want to I don't want to hear it.
42:41
SPEAKER_01: I don't want to cheat it, yeah.
42:42
SPEAKER_01: So so let's give him um his teacher, Vesimir.
42:46
SPEAKER_01: He was the oldest and most experienced witcher of Keremoran.
42:51
SPEAKER_01: Um, and he acted as a father figure to Geralt and pretty much all the witchers of that time.
42:57
SPEAKER_01: Um Vesemir was not as physically capable because Geralt is eventually crowned as the greatest witcher, the most capable, uh being mainly the just that he did so much.
43:11
SPEAKER_01: I mean, you have the the Assassin of Kings Witcher 2, if there's gamers out there listening to this.
43:17
SPEAKER_01: Um but uh Vesemir was also a badass in his own right.
43:23
SPEAKER_01: He he was one of the few members of the School of the Wolf.
43:26
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
43:27
SPEAKER_01: There's many different Witcher schools of combat.
43:29
SPEAKER_01: Uh eventually Geralt does go into the School of the Wolf as well.
43:33
SPEAKER_01: Um, he had all the same uh superhuman abilities, swordsmanship, alchemy, signs or magics, the utilitarian magics that Geralt have.
43:41
SPEAKER_01: Um, except he came with an experience at this point that's far greater than Geralt.
43:49
SPEAKER_02: So Geralt was learning about touching the stove from this guy.
43:53
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, he was learning about touching the stove.
43:56
SPEAKER_01: So he brought his own Odysseus.
44:00
SPEAKER_02: That's very interesting.
44:01
SPEAKER_01: Um so if if Geralt brought brought dandelion, I would say that that's a rap.
44:08
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I'd say that's a rap.
44:10
SPEAKER_01: But in this case, we're because we want these characters to have a fair fight, we were gonna we're gonna say that.
44:15
SPEAKER_01: He brings Vesimir and that changes the game.
44:16
SPEAKER_01: So now you have two of these characters bringing their steel.
44:21
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, but it's also but ste but Odysseus proved that you don't need steel in order to beat something that's godly.
44:29
SPEAKER_02: He he blinded a Cyclops with wood.
44:33
SPEAKER_02: That's true.
44:34
SPEAKER_02: He uh he's the kind of person who will create like very elaborate and wide-ranging, like requires like the construction of fucking traps and stuff.
44:47
SPEAKER_02: He created he thought up the Trojan and horse and created it.
44:51
SPEAKER_01: Which honestly, I think that turns that the other way because Vesemir, while he was wise, being as old as he was.
44:58
SPEAKER_01: So both The Witcher and Vesimir, so Geralt and Vesimir are very old characters by the time their prime comes around.
45:06
SPEAKER_01: So Geralt is about a hundred when he's getting ready to be at his prime, and Vesimir is much older than that.
45:13
SPEAKER_01: However, for those of you who've read the books and played all the games, Vesimir was only a fencing instructor.
45:23
SPEAKER_01: He did not have the knowledge of mutinagens to create more witchers.
45:27
SPEAKER_01: Oh.
45:28
SPEAKER_01: So he was lacking in his wisdom, which I So I mean Achilles was very much a story of made the badass win.
45:37
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
45:37
SPEAKER_01: Whereas Odysseus in the Odyssey was this is what knowledge can do, chillins.
45:42
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
45:43
SPEAKER_02: Being clever is a superpower.
45:47
SPEAKER_02: Achilles died.
45:48
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
45:49
SPEAKER_02: And Odysseus.
45:50
SPEAKER_01: Odysseus got home.
45:51
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, Odysseus made it all the way home.
45:53
SPEAKER_01: It took him a long fucking time to sail across a you know a lake, but um, it's not even an ocean.
46:04
SPEAKER_02: You you dumb asshole.
46:06
SPEAKER_02: It took you 10 years to get to get like I look at a map and it's like a centimeter.
46:11
SPEAKER_02: It took me 10 years.
46:13
SPEAKER_01: It's like the Moses journey.
46:17
SPEAKER_02: These people.
46:18
SPEAKER_01: You know, I will think about this though.
46:19
SPEAKER_01: His the true hero of that is his wife.
46:23
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, seriously.
46:24
SPEAKER_01: It's just like he'll be home anytime.
46:26
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, uh, she doesn't man, she doesn't get enough respect from Odysseus, I feel.
46:33
SPEAKER_02: No, no, I feel like especially especially in like Homer's The Odyssey, like not a gr not a woman-friendly culture, ancient Greece.
46:42
SPEAKER_01: Without texting, email, or letters.
46:45
SPEAKER_01: If I showed up back to my home after two decades, and my wife is like, Oh, thank god, you're back.
46:52
SPEAKER_01: I've been faithful.
46:53
SPEAKER_01: I'd be like, holy shit, you queen.
46:58
SPEAKER_02: Holy fuck.
46:59
SPEAKER_02: Um I don't think I don't know if there's any evidence in the Iliad of Odysseus being unfaithful.
47:04
SPEAKER_02: Oh no, he was.
47:05
SPEAKER_02: He fucking he had Cersei, he was on he was unfaithful the whole time.
47:09
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, he was on Facebook Calypso, like a bunch of times he was unfaithful.
47:13
SPEAKER_02: What a piece of shit.
47:15
SPEAKER_02: And then he's like, and he's like, Woman, you better not have had another man in your bed.
47:20
SPEAKER_02: You motherfucker.
47:21
SPEAKER_01: This is where we're coming from.
47:22
SPEAKER_01: This is where we're coming from.
47:24
SPEAKER_02: This is our shared history, everybody.
47:26
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, way to go.
47:27
SPEAKER_01: We nailed it.
47:29
SPEAKER_01: Um, I would so and well at the end of the day in our verses match then.
47:33
SPEAKER_01: So I think that so when they have that city view, Geralt alone, him alone uh beats Achilles alone.
47:40
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
47:41
SPEAKER_01: Now that they had their friend, you have Odysseus.
47:44
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
47:45
SPEAKER_01: And but does Odysseus beat Geralt and Vesimir?
47:52
SPEAKER_01: The the leftover energies of Geralt and then of Zemir.
47:59
SPEAKER_02: I think he does.
48:00
SPEAKER_02: Odysseus is like a master manipulator of he's not just ingenious with his constructions, but he is also a master manipulator of people.
48:08
SPEAKER_02: He convinced, he's the one who convinced Achilles to go to war for the Greeks.
48:13
SPEAKER_02: He he he so his parents sent him away from home on a random small island in the Mediterranean, and then Odysseus went around.
48:23
SPEAKER_02: It was a girl's convent, and he was hidden there as a girl.
48:27
SPEAKER_02: And Odysseus was like, I bet, I bet he's hidden on this convent.
48:30
SPEAKER_02: And he came in with a sp with a bunch of things to sell, and there was a spear, and it was Achilles' dad's spear, and Achilles was like immediately drawn to it, and he's like, That's a fucking boy, he's going to war.
48:43
SPEAKER_02: And Odysseus got him in there.
48:45
SPEAKER_01: I was honestly, I so Vesemir, while he is the father figure of Geralt's story, he is not the mythological embodiment of tactics and thought that Odysseus is.
49:00
SPEAKER_01: And I think that's where the failing would be.
49:02
SPEAKER_01: Grant Geralt could beat Achilles in their fight when they're both armed with everything, but as soon as Achilles brings in Odysseus, Geralt outside of Yennefer doesn't have anyone that he could bring to stop that.
49:18
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
49:19
SPEAKER_01: And so I think that's where High and Dry has to come out and say that while it's hair fucking thin close, I'd say like 75% of the time Achilles wins.
49:32
SPEAKER_01: And if and if Geralt was allowed to bring Ennefer, this would be a different discussion, but he's not.
49:37
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
49:38
SPEAKER_01: This fight has to go to Achilles.
49:40
SPEAKER_01: So Achilles takes it two out of three.
49:43
SPEAKER_01: Probably I would say the closest fight we'd have.
49:47
SPEAKER_01: We've had, at least at this point in six episodes.
49:50
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
49:50
SPEAKER_01: Um, but Achilles takes it, two out of three.
49:53
SPEAKER_01: Um, and there it is.
49:55
SPEAKER_01: So there it is.
49:55
SPEAKER_01: So we we talked about Hitler, we talked about killing babies.
49:59
SPEAKER_01: One last specifically baby Hitler.
50:01
SPEAKER_01: James, last thoughts.
50:02
SPEAKER_02: Last thoughts is we gotta take one more hit for the rope.
50:05
SPEAKER_02: For that, that was a tough one.
50:07
SPEAKER_01: That was a tough one.
50:08
SPEAKER_02: That was a tough one.
50:11
SPEAKER_01: Ooh, it sounds so good.
50:13
SPEAKER_01: That's a sound only vodka can make.
50:20
SPEAKER_02: The best vodka.
50:23
SPEAKER_01: You know who you are.
50:24
SPEAKER_01: You heard that sound.
50:26
SPEAKER_01: Come on, pay us money.
50:29
SPEAKER_01: There it is.
50:29
SPEAKER_01: But I will say this happy sixth episode.
50:32
SPEAKER_01: Happy 100 episodes, and happy the first time.
50:35
SPEAKER_01: You're the one who's making us take the extra shot.
50:38
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, way to go, team.
50:40
SPEAKER_01: Here it is.
50:40
SPEAKER_01: Uh so I think the real winners, though, are the people who got to mentally imagine Henry Cavill and Brad Pitt just wrestling it up.
50:47
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, just wrestling it out.
50:49
SPEAKER_01: And this is circa 2001, Brad Pitt.
50:53
SPEAKER_01: Cheers.
50:57
SPEAKER_01: Oh, fuck.
50:59
SPEAKER_01: Smooth.
51:00
SPEAKER_01: God.
51:00
SPEAKER_01: Boop vodka.
51:02
SPEAKER_01: The best vodka.
51:05
SPEAKER_02: All right, everybody.
51:06
SPEAKER_02: Uh uh, you know, check us out on Instagram, High and Dry Podcast.
51:10
SPEAKER_02: Uh, I'm at the Diabolical on Twitter.
51:13
SPEAKER_02: We got at Baron North Ryan on Twitter.
51:16
SPEAKER_02: And uh, yeah, give us a follow.
51:18
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, hit us up on Instagram, Facebook, and really use some help.
51:21
SPEAKER_01: Um, I know it's just a place for racist grandmas right now, but it could also be a place for high and dry.
51:26
SPEAKER_02: Also, yeah, we can we can find a place among racist grandmas.
51:29
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I think so.
51:30
SPEAKER_01: I think so.
51:31
SPEAKER_01: Um targeted audience.
51:32
SPEAKER_01: We just talked about killing Hitler though, so probably not.
51:35
SPEAKER_01: Um high and dry pod, high mm dry podcast dot buzzpropra dot com.
51:41
SPEAKER_01: You can find us on Spotify, you can spy find us on Amazon Music, all the other fucking things.
51:46
SPEAKER_02: Wherever you find podcasts, wherever you're listening to us now.
51:49
SPEAKER_01: Thanks for listening, guys.
51:49
SPEAKER_01: I'm Ryan Barron North.
51:51
SPEAKER_01: James Crosslin.
51:52
SPEAKER_01: Take it easy.