Latest / Beyond Fulfillment Podcast / From Trauma to Triumph: The Journey to True Fulfillment with Alan Lazaros

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From Trauma to Triumph: The Journey to True Fulfillment with Alan Lazaros · Beyond Fulfillment Podcast

0:04
It's going to be.
0:04
It's up to me.
0:05
And I had this just insatiable drive.
0:10
What happens when a near fatal car accident forces you to realize you've been living someone else's version of success?
0:18
Alan Lazarus had the corporate title, the income, and the resume to prove he'd made it.
0:23
Then, at 26, a car accident almost took everything.
0:28
Mirroring the death of his own father years before.
0:31
That moment didn't just change his direction, it changed how he defined fulfillment entirely.
0:37
In this conversation, Alan breaks down the concept of self efficacy, why honest self assessment is harder than any business strategy, and what it actually takes to build something meaningful when the process is slow and unglamorous.
0:52
If you've ever wondered whether the success you're chasing is actually, actually yours, you won't want to miss this one.
0:58
As always, if you found value from this content, please like and subscribe.
1:02
All right, Alan Lazarus, welcome to Beyond Fulfillment.
1:07
Thank you for having me.
1:08
First of all, the thing that I always open with is gratitude.
1:11
Number one, because I remember in the beginning when it was crickets and nobody cared.
1:18
Number two is anyone who is watching or listening.
1:21
I've started opening up everything I do with this sort of.
1:23
I think what you pay attention to is dictating a large part of your future.
1:27
So I don't take it lightly that I'm here.
1:29
I don't take it lightly that whoever is out there watching or listening.
1:31
The 21st century is very noisy.
1:33
So we're going to try to give you some good stuff.
1:35
Love that and I appreciate that, Alan, for you opening with that, for sure.
1:39
And as you mentioned.
1:41
Right.
1:41
If anyone can talk about what it's like to be a podcaster, you're certainly qualified.
1:46
You've been doing it over nine years, 2,000 plus episodes.
1:50
So we'll get into all of that.
1:52
Nice.
1:53
And you've got, you know, everyone has a unique journey, but yours is particularly, particularly unique.
2:00
How you became an entrepreneur after a near fatal car accident and then what you've done since since then is simply amazing.
2:07
So if you could, for all the listeners, can you just set the stage and tell us your backstory and how you became an entrepreneur?
2:14
I love that you said set the stage.
2:15
That's exactly the way I frame it.
2:19
Because I think it's important to know who you're talking to.
2:21
Right.
2:24
Okay.
2:24
So the three main things, I'll try to condense 37 years into just a few minutes here.
2:29
I'll try to go quick with it.
2:30
And then if you want to go deeper, we can but so early on 1990.
2:36
So I was born in 1988, born and raised in Massachusetts and I had a birth father named John McCorkle.
2:42
He had a lot of siblings so it was six kids.
2:46
It was Jim, Joe, John, Jane, Joan, Jeanette, all j my birth father in 1991 when I was two, almost three died suddenly in a car.
2:57
My mom was a stay at home mom at the time 1991 she was 31, my sister was 6ish 5 or 6 and I was almost 3 and so tough start for sure.
3:09
Tough start.
3:10
I had a stepfather named Steve Lazarus who came into my life from age 3 to 14, so probably 1992 to early 2000s.
3:21
He left my family when I was a freshman.
3:24
I was going into my freshman year in high school.
3:25
So I did the traditional path.
3:27
I did the preschool, kindergarten, elementary school, middle school, high school, college, corporate thing.
3:32
And at this point I was 14 years old.
3:34
Hardest year of my life.
3:35
Did not know that at the time.
3:38
So from 3 to 14 I playfully refer to my life as boats and BS.
3:42
And the reason why is because it was the dot com bubble.
3:45
The US is the largest economy on planet Earth and the dot com the 90s were wild.
3:52
My stepfather worked for a company called Agfa Agfa.
3:55
They did hospital computers during the dot com era when everything was going digital.
4:00
So we did very well.
4:01
So from the outside in things looked great.
4:03
Boats, ski trips, snowmobiles, Ducati motorcycle.
4:06
Mom drove a BMW, lived on a lake, had an apartment building, we had a yacht.
4:11
And it wasn't anything crazy crazy but it was definitely like upper middle class type of thing.
4:16
But my mom and stepdad did not get along and that's a polite way to put it.
4:20
So from the inside out it was pretty bad.
4:22
From the outside in it looked really good.
4:25
So 14 my mom and stepdad finally decide to split.
4:29
He leaves my family.
4:32
I took his last name I think around age 7.
4:35
He leaves my family, takes his entire extended family with him.
4:38
To this day I've never seen or spoken to a single one of them since I talked to my stepdad on Facebook Messenger.
4:46
A little bit in my 20s, tiny bit in my 30s and never seen the man.
4:51
So 14 was the hardest year of my life in hindsight.
4:54
Did not know this at the time.
4:56
So that happened.
4:57
Not only that, but he took 95% of the income with him.
5:00
So we went from sort of boats and ski trips to I get free lunch at school now because our income is so low.
5:05
My mom trades in her BMW for little Honda Civic.
5:08
How do we keep the house and the family?
5:09
I get free lunch at school.
5:10
Like I mentioned, we don't have cable.
5:13
We're not going to starve by any means.
5:16
But we're definitely like, how do we.
5:19
No, no trust fund, no generational wealth, no dad.
5:22
How am I going to go to college?
5:24
My dream college at the time was WPI, Worcester Polytechnic Institute.
5:27
It's like a mini MIT in Massachusetts.
5:29
And it was 50 grand a year back then.
5:31
So I went from I hope I get in to.
5:33
Even if I do get in, I can't go.
5:38
So that year, same year my sister moves out, same year my mom gets in a fight with my Aunt Sandy.
5:45
And we like bad fight.
5:47
We get ostracized from my mom's side of the family.
5:50
To this day, I've seen her spoken to two human beings from my mom's side and.
5:54
And we don't associate much with the McCorkles anymore.
5:56
Cause we're trying to be the Lazaruses.
5:58
So I kind of lost three families by the time I'm 14.
6:03
So again, I didn't know this at the time.
6:05
I've only rewatched the movie of my life.
6:07
In my 30s, a bunch did some therapy.
6:10
I understand now that that was not normal.
6:13
And basically, in hindsight, the abandonment thing was like, okay.
6:20
I had two trauma responses.
6:21
Number one, there was a social trauma response of like, don't lose any more friends and family.
6:25
Don't lose any more friends and family.
6:26
Don't lose any more friends and family.
6:27
Be a chameleon.
6:28
Fit in, fit in, fit in, fit in, fit in, fit in.
6:31
Just whatever you have to do.
6:32
Be a chameleon.
6:34
So that was sort of the social coward came out of me.
6:37
But behind the scenes, when no one was around because there's fight, flight, freeze and Fawn.
6:42
Fawn is appease.
6:43
I didn't learn about that till my 30s.
6:45
You just appease everybody all the time.
6:48
Low self worth.
6:49
But behind the scenes, it was fight.
6:52
Chip on my shoulder.
6:53
Aim higher, work harder, get smarter.
6:55
Aim higher, work harder, get smarter.
6:57
No trust fund, no generational wealth.
6:59
Like, if it's gonna be, it's up to me.
7:00
And I had this just insatiable drive.
7:04
So I got straight A's through all of high school.
7:07
I got what's called the President's Award.
7:08
It's signed by George W.
7:09
Bush behind me.
7:10
And basically it means you get straight A's for all 16 report cards all four years.
7:14
All through high school.
7:15
I got all the scholarships and financial aid that I could.
7:18
I got all the Awards at the awards center.
7:19
Not all of them, but a bunch of them.
7:20
And I.
7:21
And I got into college and I got a lot of scholarships and financial aid.
7:26
Fortunately, something called no Child Left Behind.
7:28
Massachusetts.
7:29
I got, you know, no interest loans and all kinds of help.
7:31
My mom helped a bit, but I got to go to college, graduated with high distinction, computer engineering, got my master's in business, and then it was off to the races.
7:40
And I was used to being broke after my stepdad left.
7:42
So this was weird.
7:44
I went from 65 a year to 85 a year, 85 a year to 105, 105 to 125, 125 to basically almost 200 grand a year.
7:52
I peaked at about 180 grand a year in my early 20s back then.
7:57
And I paid off 84 grand worth of college debt in a single year.
8:01
I invested all the rest of my money because I figured wealth was the answer and I didn't need much.
8:08
That was the cool part, is, like, I grew up without much.
8:11
So.
8:11
So after my stepdad left, so I didn't need much.
8:14
So I bought a 2004 Volkswagen Passat that I used to call the tank.
8:18
And it was five grand cash.
8:20
And so I just invested all my money.
8:21
So I had 150 grand in a Vanguard account.
8:24
And I was just like, okay, I'll just build wealth.
8:26
My rent was 500 bucks.
8:27
I didn't have a mortgage.
8:28
I didn't have kids.
8:29
You know, I had a beautiful girlfriend, high school friends, college friends, corporate friends.
8:32
I had like this thriving social life.
8:34
Cognex, the company I worked for, was work hard, play hard.
8:37
I used to say, work hard, play harder.
8:39
And then I got in my car accident.
8:42
So I'm 26 at this point.
8:45
Dark winter night in 2015.
8:47
I'm supposed to yield, and I don't.
8:49
I end up on the wrong side of the road.
8:50
The yield sign is covered by the snow banks.
8:52
Head on collision.
8:53
Lift kitted pickup truck, 30 miles an hour.
8:58
So I'm 26 at this time, and both cars are completely totaled.
9:04
And fortunately, I was driving that Volkswagen Passat.
9:06
Thank you, Volkswagen, for the safest freaking car ever.
9:09
The airbags deployed, the lift kitted pickup truck went up and on top of my car.
9:13
And no one was killed, fortunately, because it would have been my fault.
9:19
But that was sort of the second chance my dad never got.
9:22
So my dad died in a car when he was 28.
9:25
I was 26 at this time, and I don't want to say I was on Autopilot.
9:29
Because I've always been kind of existential as an engineer.
9:33
Pretty much everything's been by design.
9:35
But I will say I was not living a life as true to myself as I thought.
9:41
And so that was when I found personal growth, personal development and self improvement.
9:45
And that's when I, I started a company called Alan Lazarus llc.
9:49
What you'll never learn in school, but desperately need to know, because I was like, I went down the personal growth rabbit hole, right?
9:55
The Tony Robbins, the Jim Rohn's, the OG Mandinos, the, the Stephen Coveys all.
10:00
And I could keep going and going and going, and I was like, why didn't we learn about any of this in school?
10:06
Habits and courage, humility, vulnerability, character, goal setting, productivity, time management, finance.
10:16
I didn't take my first finance course till I was in grad school.
10:20
Fitness.
10:21
Where was that?
10:21
Right?
10:22
Where was that?
10:22
So that's still the mission I'm on now.
10:25
So now we have Next Level university.
10:26
You mentioned nine years podcasting.
10:28
11 years ago, started that company and I'm still on that same mission.
10:34
So now we have a 23 person team.
10:35
We produce 86 podcasts.
10:37
Now I coach 26 business owners, one on one.
10:42
And we have, we reach, I have the metrics, I track every day.
10:46
We've reached over 1.4 million people with our podcasts, the Next Level University podcast.
10:52
I have a conscious couples podcast with my partner.
10:55
But ultimately it's still that same mission, which is what you'll never learn in school, but desperately need to know.
11:04
Okay, all right, well, wow, I appreciate the intro and setting the stage and there's so much to unpack there.
11:10
We don't have the time today to go deep into all of that.
11:14
But yeah, do want to just key in on, on a few points here.
11:19
First of all, the car accident, how bad were you hurt?
11:22
Yeah, so mentally, emotionally and spiritually bad, but physically not bad.
11:28
Yeah, physically, there was no permanent damage.
11:30
Rattled, definitely rattled.
11:32
Right, but nobody was really that hurt.
11:36
Yeah, I mean, the lift kitted pickup truck went up and on top, both airbags deployed.
11:40
I used to call that Volkswagen Passat the tank.
11:43
It was a very safe vehicle.
11:47
Okay.
11:48
All right.
11:48
So you go through this traumatic experience right to where you're, you're rattled, shaken, and that, that really was the genesis to you starting your company and really going down this personal growth rabbit hole that, that you mentioned.
12:03
Yeah, well, so, because, because my dad died in a car at 28.
12:08
For me, I was with my little cousin, second cousin, his name is Dan, and he was 17 at the time.
12:14
And he was tweeting about it that night, like.
12:16
And I couldn't believe that I was so messed up by this.
12:19
And he was fine.
12:20
It's like, dude, we could have just died.
12:22
Like, why aren't, why isn't this a big deal to you?
12:25
But for me, I now realize in hindsight, for me, my dad did die suddenly, and I know that we could have.
12:33
And so the real thing that got me more than anything was, yeah, I was successful and, yeah, you know, I did great and whatever.
12:43
I overcame a lot of adversity.
12:44
And I'm not trying to lessen that because I think that's a big deal.
12:46
But in hindsight, it's like, yo, I was resting on talent, man.
12:50
I wasn't putting it all on the court.
12:52
I wasn't reaching my full potential.
12:53
And I think that that's what got me most is I wasn't doing all I could with all I had, and I wasn't taking care of my health.
13:00
I was drinking too much and too often.
13:02
I just wasn't putting it all on the court.
13:03
I was successful, but unfulfilled.
13:09
Okay, all right.
13:11
And so interesting so that, that, you know, because we hear about too, right?
13:16
Like maybe people going through midlife stuff where they have these kind of awakenings, right?
13:20
And you had such a.
13:23
A near death experience that really affected you because obviously, because your father, too, where he didn't get that second chance.
13:30
So you realize you're not living up to your full potential.
13:33
You have all this success on the surface when you, you're doing well financially, but you just, you.
13:39
You know that there's another level, right, that you really want to reach and to really feel fulfilled.
13:44
So what's the process like once you have that realization?
13:49
Like, how do you go from just this corporate gig engineer to actually creating this, this incredible company that you've.
13:56
You've given us some statistics about.
13:59
Thank you.
13:59
Yeah, so the first one is figuring out which of these you suck at most.
14:07
This is why.
14:07
This is why I think a lot of my content isn't as popular as other people's.
14:13
I think the Internet's wildly overly validating.
14:16
So I'm just gonna preface this with everybody.
14:18
I'm not gonna validate much of anything.
14:20
I actually think most people suck at most things, including myself.
14:24
And I think that that's where you need to start is like, where am I sucking?
14:27
And so there's three things we all have to really understand at a deep level to succeed in life.
14:32
The first one is understanding Yourself self awareness.
14:35
The second one is understanding other people, others awareness.
14:38
And the third one is understanding the world and how it works.
14:42
So I was everyone's really good at one.
14:44
So I use the metaphor of imagine you have three 4K TVs.
14:49
One of them is your understanding of the world, one of them is your understanding of others, and one of them is your understanding of yourself.
14:56
Everyone has one TV that's hd, one TV that's kind of blurry and one that's complete static.
15:04
Mine that was complete static was the self awareness one.
15:07
I didn't understand how different I was, Dave.
15:13
Like the straight A thing and all that.
15:15
Like I didn't understand that that wasn't normal.
15:18
And there's a bunch more in there that we can go into.
15:20
But I've now that I've coached 6,890 hours of one on one coaching with people all over the world, world, I very clearly I see the bell curve now and I can see not only how different my childhood was,
15:32
but how different my reaction to adversity was.
15:37
And a lot of people that make it, quote unquote, actually don't know this, but they have a ton of what's called self efficacy.
15:44
Self efficacy is self belief.
15:46
It's, it's your, your, the degree of certainty you have in your ability to create outcomes in the future.
15:52
Mine was always wicked high.
15:54
So other people get in a car accident and they just go on with their life.
15:57
Some people get in a car accident, change everything.
16:00
And people always ask me like what makes the difference?
16:02
The truth is self efficacy, it's fixed mindset, growth mindset, but like on steroids.
16:07
And ultimately to answer your question, where do you start?
16:10
You figure out which one of those you suck at most.
16:13
So for me, I didn't understand myself and the differences between me and others, but I did understand science, technology, engineering, mathematics, business, finance.
16:21
Like the global economy made perfect sense to me.
16:24
That's why I could invest in the stock market to do really well.
16:26
That's why I did really well in corporate.
16:28
Like some people are good at success, other people are good at like relationships.
16:34
Almost no one's good at both.
16:36
Some people are good at achievement, other people are good at fulfillment.
16:41
Almost no one's good at both.
16:43
So health, wealth and love.
16:45
Have you ever met someone who's healthy, wealthy and in love?
16:47
Very few, because we're all very one dimensional.
16:51
And it's understandable because whatever causes pain growing up, we usually run in the opposite direction of that.
16:56
So we were broke.
16:57
My stepdad left, so I Was like, okay, wealth is the answer.
17:00
Well, it's not, but I didn't know that until after.
17:04
And so where does someone start?
17:06
They start by identifying where you're the worst, where, which one of these is staticky, and then how do you learn more about that?
17:14
So I always say, if you want a coach, you probably need a therapist.
17:16
I had dozens of mentors and coaches, Some of them great, some of them, in hindsight, terrible.
17:21
But I need a therapist.
17:23
So people who want therapists, they probably need coaches.
17:26
People who want coaches and mentors probably need a therapist.
17:29
And the reason why is because we all unconsciously avoid whatever it is that causes us a lot of pain.
17:36
Okay.
17:38
So, yeah, and like in the beginning too, when you talked, when you're giving your, your story and you talked about you went to therapy and then you rattled off so much self awareness that I'm sure came out of
17:49
that.
17:50
So how, like when you look at your trajectory and how far you've come with this company and how many people you've been able to help, like, how important would you say, like your therapy and really getting to understand
18:00
yourself has been to that, that success?
18:05
Unbelievable.
18:06
But again, I, I'm not convinced that that's the path for everybody.
18:10
I have some engineering genius friends that I went to college with that need a therapist desperately.
18:15
They already know the economy, they know technology, they know ETFs, they know, they know index funds, they know the stock market.
18:22
They know what companies will win, they know what won't.
18:24
Like some people really do.
18:25
It's, it's actually, you know, success doesn't come very hard to some people.
18:30
Those people need therapists.
18:33
And what I mean by that is they're not fulfilled in their marriages and they're not healthy.
18:36
Typically, we've all met like multimillionaires that are like divorced and out of shape.
18:41
Right.
18:43
And so for me, the therapy component was huge.
18:47
My business partner Kevin, he already had a therapist when he was in his 20s.
18:51
I don't think that was the answer for him necessarily.
18:54
So, yes, everyone should have both coaches and therapists and mentors.
18:57
Make sure you get good ones, because some of them are awful.
19:00
But at the end of the day, you either are good at the outer work or good at the inner work.
19:07
Almost no one is good at both.
19:09
Almost no one.
19:10
And so you have to face which one you suck at and then go dig where you, the gold is buried where you least want to dig.
19:16
The last thing I wanted to do, man, was look at my past.
19:20
I mean, I didn't want to face all that.
19:24
I didn't talk about my dad's death till I was 26.
19:27
Right.
19:28
So I avoided it unconsciously just because it caused so much pain.
19:34
Okay.
19:34
Wow.
19:35
So I love that line.
19:36
The gold is buried where you least want to dig.
19:39
So, I mean, when you mentioned you.
19:41
You've coached close to 7,000 hours across all these different clients.
19:45
Right.
19:46
And like you said, most people, I guess, are naturally good at either understanding themselves, understanding the world, or understanding others.
19:54
Right.
19:55
So, I mean, from your work and, like, the transform you've seen and with the client work, would you say that the real growth and fulfillment comes from basically getting good at.
20:06
Like you said, you're naturally going to be good at one and most likely suck at the other two.
20:10
So the real joy and fulfillment is getting good at those other areas where you suck.
20:15
And ultimately the fulfillment is.
20:17
Yes.
20:18
Understanding yourself, others, and the world.
20:20
Yeah.
20:21
People.
20:22
So that's exactly green, yellow, red.
20:26
We have one green, one yellow, and one red.
20:28
So my green was understanding the world.
20:30
That came easy.
20:30
As an engineer, math, science, technology, like, that came easy.
20:35
Natural.
20:36
Natural is a good way to put it.
20:37
Like straight A's.
20:41
Some people don't actually have to try that hard in school.
20:45
Like, I.
20:46
I tried harder than the average bear, But.
20:47
And no one's allowed to say this because you sound like such a prick when you do.
20:50
I'm not trying to be a prick here.
20:52
I just.
20:53
You're not really allowed to say this, but it's important socially.
20:57
People get mad at you if you identify that you're gifted.
21:01
But I would be doing everyone a disservice if I.
21:04
If I like everyone out there watching or listening.
21:08
Think of the person that wins at everything.
21:11
They just win at everything all the time.
21:13
They.
21:14
Oh, they're successful at everything.
21:16
Listen, they're not allowed to say this to you, and they don't even know it, but they're gifted, right?
21:24
They're very gifted.
21:26
They were born different.
21:27
And you're not allowed to say that either.
21:28
But I'm gonna say it because I don't want people like my business partner Kevin, to hear people like me and then think that he is somehow less successful than he should be because he hasn't done what I've done.
21:42
And through these coaching sessions, the hours, that's when you learn all these walks of life and go, oh, I've never struggled with that.
21:51
Oh, I've never struggled with that.
21:52
I've never struggled with that.
21:54
And you start to learn where you are on the bell curve.
21:56
So there's certain things that I suck at.
21:58
But there's something called multiple intelligences theory where there's nine modalities of intelligence.
22:02
One of them is kinesthetic.
22:03
Michael Jordan is a good example of that.
22:06
There's mathematics.
22:07
Einstein's a good example of that.
22:09
So basically, if you have all nine, you're like, good at everything, essentially.
22:14
And I'm not saying that that's me, but what I am saying is there are certain people out there that are.
22:19
They are more gifted than, than they can tell you.
22:24
Like, hard work doesn't come.
22:26
Like, it's not hard for me.
22:29
And you're not really allowed to say that because people get mad at you or upset or insecure or whatever.
22:33
But like some people, it's really hard for them to work hard and stay focused.
22:37
And I'm like, I don't even understand why you can't work harder.
22:41
Like, it doesn't even make any sense to me.
22:43
And is that, is that nature or nurture?
22:44
Is that because I was born that way?
22:46
Or is it because I had a very adverse childhood that required me to focus?
22:50
And do I have big goals because I chose them, or did I have big goals because I had high awareness and I knew what I was capable of because of a powerful brain?
22:57
Right.
22:57
So there's these existential questions, but back to your original point of everyone's good at one and they have a natural inclination toward one.
23:07
The other two are where you need to work.
23:10
Because fulfillment is a game that requires holistic.
23:15
I know.
23:17
I was mentored by a billionaire, several multi millionaires.
23:19
They are not fulfilled.
23:21
They're not now.
23:22
They're not not.
23:23
It's not a one or a zero.
23:24
You're fulfilled or you're not.
23:25
Like, it's one of the reasons I don't coach with or mentor with some of them is because I just know they're not really.
23:35
There's not a lot more I can learn from them, as arrogant as that might sound.
23:39
But you don't.
23:40
I would never trade places.
23:42
Like, they, they, they have kind of peaked in their thing and they're still running that same formula and they're very successful at it.
23:48
And that's great.
23:49
But.
23:49
But they're not well rounded.
23:52
They're.
23:53
They're almost never well rounded, actually.
23:56
And, and they're really successful in real estate or in business or in.
24:00
But they're almost.
24:01
No one is well rounded.
24:02
And I think F comes from being healthy, wealthy and in love.
24:07
And those are three very different skill sets.
24:11
Like, I know people that are world class in the economy, multimillionaires that are just can't exercise to save their life.
24:19
And to me it's like, what?
24:23
Like you have the money, you have the time.
24:26
Why?
24:28
Why can't you?
24:29
And then there's some people that are really good at love, but they can't get their selves to earn more money.
24:33
They don't even know how, they don't understand why they can't make more money and they can't track finances to save their life.
24:40
And so what I've learned through all this coaching is everyone is really, really strong in one of those three areas.
24:46
But what needs work if you want a holistic, fulfilling life is the areas that don't come natural.
24:52
And people don't like to hear that because in the 21st century people are very validating and affirming and they're very like, you're already good enough, you're amazing, you got this.
25:01
Everybody gets a trophy.
25:04
No, you're not amazing, you're not special.
25:08
The world doesn't owe you anything.
25:10
You're not entitled to anything.
25:12
If you want big rewards for minimal effort, you're in serious trouble.
25:16
And everything that is of value in this life that can be earned requires you to work on yourself in ways that are wildly uncomfortable.
25:27
And so what I say is chatgpt is hard for me because it's so overly affirming and it's designed to keep you using it.
25:34
And it's not just ChatGPT, but AI in general.
25:38
So I, I say this, you are not, not more successful because you don't believe enough in what you already believe.
25:44
You're not successful because you have massive blind spots.
25:48
I've coached so many people, so I found all my blind spots.
25:51
Not all of them, obviously.
25:52
I still have them, but like my TVs are much clearer now at 37 than they were at 27, than they were at 17, than they were at 7.
26:01
Like, what's the difference between a 37 year old and a 7 year old?
26:03
The 7 year old doesn't know anything.
26:05
They think their parents are great and then they realize, holy crap, that's not true, or holy crap, they really were great.
26:11
I just didn't know it.
26:12
Right.
26:13
Hopefully you're on the better end of that one.
26:15
I'm certainly not.
26:17
But at the end of the day that's what it is, is your lack of success in health, wealth or love is actually a byproduct of you being ignorant and, or arrogant in one of those three areas.
26:30
Okay, all right, so we, we've only got a few minutes left here, but just, just want to dial in too.
26:37
So when you started on this entrepreneurial path, because clearly you had, like you said, you're gifted, school came easy to you, right?
26:45
There's certainly people like that.
26:47
You started off and through your story, you didn't really know it at the time, but you know, you earned a lot of money in corporate and you didn't need much growing up.
26:56
And that was a great combination to, to, you know, bank up some money and continue down that path of building wealth.
27:02
And then you, everything changes with the car accident.
27:05
You start this entrepreneurial journey, you go down the rabbit hole with growth and all that.
27:09
But what was the process like of starting this company?
27:12
Did it scale and peak right away or how, like, how did that go when you started the podcast, you started coaching and you started getting into all this stuff.
27:22
The first thing to share with any early entrepreneurs that I was surprised by, and maybe this is just me, so I say this with a grain of salt, but after the whole preschool, kindergarten, elementary school, middle school, high
27:34
school, college, corporate thing, I realized I actually didn't have as much self discipline as I thought because I always saw myself as a very driven, disciplined guy compared to my peers.
27:46
But then when I was on my own and there was no bell to ring, there was no one looking over my shoulder, I didn't have a boss or a boss's boss.
27:51
I didn't have that structure that was the first step is okay, I have these big goals and dreams in my mind.
27:59
I always have, and they're there and I need to get started and I actually know how to do it.
28:04
And that, that's the part that I think is hardest for most people.
28:09
How do I get myself to structure my day when I don't have any accountability anywhere?
28:14
Because when you're your own boss and you haven't gotten any investors, no one is looking over your shoulders to make sure you get what you get done.
28:24
So I think that was the hardest part for me was I bought this productivity journal and I started tracking habits.
28:29
I now call it peak performance tracking.
28:31
I have like a bunch of black notebooks over here.
28:33
I used to walk around with mechanical pencil and I would track habits every single day, and I would erase them every day and then rewrite them, check them off.
28:42
Now I use Google sheets.
28:43
All my clients on my team, we all have peak performance tracking that we do metrics, habits, all this kind of stuff.
28:49
So I track.
28:49
I've been tracking habits for 11 years now, and I think that's the best habit in the world.
28:54
But for the early entrepreneurs to say, what do you start?
28:57
You start with redesigning your life for success.
29:03
And you have to start that by reverse engineering your goals and dreams.
29:06
So we do dreams, goals, metrics, habits, skills, priorities and identity.
29:12
And you make sure all of that is in alignment because if it's not, you're going to constantly be off the rails and why isn't this working?
29:18
And so, but that requires you know how to actually reverse engineer.
29:23
So some people can think, you know, it's seconds, minutes, days, weeks, months, quarters, years, decades.
29:31
And then decades lead to your lifetime and then there's beyond your own lifetime.
29:34
So I did the legacy thing where it's like, okay, what's the legacy I want to leave?
29:37
And then I reversed that all the way down to the second and I still do that.
29:43
But if some people are macro to micro, like that, but that's the rarer one.
29:47
Most people are seconds, minutes, hours, they, they go from micro to macro.
29:50
So for anyone out there who's starting out, you have to start.
29:53
How far can you think out?
29:55
This is, scientists call this projection.
29:56
You close your eyes and like, I have one client who, I was like, okay, think of yourself tomorrow, okay, next week, okay, two weeks, okay, a month.
30:04
She's like, ah, it's blurry.
30:05
I was like, oh my goodness.
30:07
Whoa.
30:08
The prefrontal cortex can imagine yourself 10, 20, 30, 40 years from now.
30:13
But some people's can't.
30:15
Some people can only imagine a stranger.
30:17
They've done studies where they hook you up to an FMRI and they show that some people can't imagine themselves in the future.
30:23
This is called future potentiality.
30:26
So if you are like me and you can see all these different future eventualities or potentialities now, you have to align with them.
30:33
And aligning with them is hard.
30:34
Takes self discipline.
30:36
You can't, I always say you can't start, start apple and go to the beach like you, you, you, you have.
30:42
If you have a goal, you have to like be subservient to the goal.
30:45
Right now we have a ten pound and ten week challenge with our community and I'm two pounds down, I have eight to go and I'm behind.
30:53
So like, I want to eat more, but I can't.
30:55
And I can, obviously.
30:56
I just not if I want to hit my goal.
30:58
And this is all based on mathematic modalities.
31:00
And like, despite what you want to believe, there is a formula for success and success meaning an outcome you're creating in the future.
31:09
And there is an exact recipe to get there.
31:10
You just aren't on all.
31:12
You either don't know the recipe or you're not in alignment with the recipe.
31:15
So one of them is self discipline, the other one's knowledge and awareness.
31:18
But my point to answer your original question is you have to start with some sort of a goal in the future, even if it's a week out.
31:27
And then, so you set a level one goal, you put in level one effort, you get to level two, you set a level two goal, you put in level two effort, you get to level three, and then you
31:36
build from there.
31:37
I happen to be someone who was able to go from 10 and then reverse engineer it down and then climb the ladder.
31:43
I realize now through my business partner Kevin and all the people I coach, that's not necessarily the norm statistically.
31:50
So what most people have to do is like, if you have level four self efficacy, AKA self belief, you can probably see four months out.
31:57
You got to set a goal for maybe the quarter and then actually hit it.
32:01
Because when you hit it, your subconscious and unconscious goes, okay, what else can I do?
32:05
Okay, what else can I do?
32:06
Okay, what else can I do?
32:08
That's why a 70 year old and a 7 year old have very different goals.
32:12
Because a 7 year old doesn't really know enough yet to be able to project forward.
32:17
Like, if I say, what are you going to look like in a week?
32:19
You could tell me, okay, seven years, could you tell me what about 17 years?
32:23
And the truth is you can change the way you look by going into the future in advance, seeing the alarming version and the good one, and then reverse engineering it to make sure you do the good one.
32:36
Okay, so you're when you started, right?
32:40
Because again, you have this super high self efficacy and you had success and you were so motivated, like in terms of getting the business off the ground and getting clients, clients right away.
32:52
Were you able to really take off with that type of trajectory the first year?
32:58
So I could give you our whole trajectory right now.
33:00
The first year we made no money.
33:03
Well, actually my first year I did make money, Kevin and I, nine years ago with the podcast.
33:07
I have those numbers.
33:08
It's 0, then 0k.
33:10
First year, 13k.
33:11
The second year, 33 the year after that.
33:13
Then it jumped 84k and then it doubled every year for like four years.
33:18
Then we got cocky and then we only grew by like our average percent growth over the last three years is probably like 22%.
33:28
So now we're, we're about to Cross half a million per year.
33:32
Okay.
33:32
All right, so let's just.
33:34
Because so many people, right, have these entrepreneurial dreams and goals and ambitions, and we, you know, we hear all the stats.
33:41
9 out of 10 or more businesses fail, and so many people, you know, they start out, it's a lot harder than they thought, and then they quit.
33:49
Right, so clearly you experienced some, Some early adversity.
33:52
You know, working a whole year making no money, and then, I mean, we can call 13 grand, basically making no money second year.
33:59
I mean.
34:00
Right, but so in, in those early days, like, how did you keep going when it was.
34:05
I gotta imagine, you didn't think it was gonna be that tough.
34:08
I didn't think it would be that tough.
34:09
That's fair.
34:10
That's fair.
34:10
I, I.
34:11
But I didn't expect it to be easy either.
34:16
How did I get through those early years?
34:18
This is something that I never used to say because I didn't fully understand it, and I didn't want it to come off wrong.
34:25
But if you asked my business partner, Kevin, the same question, he would say, I had no idea we would make it.
34:32
I can't say that, because I did know we would.
34:35
Now, I didn't know that the exact amount of time, like, it took longer than I thought.
34:41
So that.
34:42
The truth is, I never questioned whether or not we could be successful.
34:47
The level of success is what I questioned.
34:50
And I always questioned the approach.
34:52
Always, like, when things weren't working, I always go back to the drawing board.
34:55
I still do.
34:56
Kevin and I do every other day, like, why isn't this working?
35:00
Why isn't this working?
35:00
Why isn't this.
35:01
So the strategy and the approach, we change all the time.
35:05
But I never really questioned whether or not I could be a successful podcaster or a successful coach or a successful business owner.
35:12
And the reason why for that is I.
35:16
I've broken down.
35:17
Like, every game, if you study game theory can be broken down.
35:21
Like, everyone has this.
35:22
I'll use this as an example.
35:23
It'd be last piece.
35:24
I had a client once, and I said, how certain are you 0 to 10 that you could get Subway for dinner tonight?
35:30
Subway is a Subway for your global listeners.
35:33
It's just a sandwich place.
35:35
She said, 10, and I said, okay, your brain just did a calculation.
35:39
You know where a Subway is.
35:41
You know that it's open.
35:43
You know that you know how to eat.
35:45
You know how to chew.
35:46
You know your credit card will work.
35:47
You know you have a car to get there.
35:48
I said, how certain are you going to eat a sub and go get it and eat it and finish it within the next 10 minutes.
35:53
She's like, not a chance.
35:56
I said, it's the exact same thing.
35:58
I'm certain I can build a large, successful company, but I can't do it tomorrow.
36:06
I can do it over time.
36:08
And this is the compound effect.
36:09
This is your ability to decode and reverse engineer a finish line and then start from scratch.
36:15
Like, Apple didn't say, hey, I'm gonna make an iPhone.
36:20
They started with the first Apple II computer, and then they built from there, and eventually the Apple II became the Macintosh and the Lisa, and then eventually it was an ipod.
36:30
And then it was like, okay, well, the ipod's on the Internet now.
36:33
Okay, well, now the ipod's gonna be on the Internet and a phone.
36:35
Oh, the iPhone 18 Pro Max right over here.
36:39
And it's like this.
36:41
The iPhone at the beginning in 2007, when I was a senior, would have was a revolutionary breakthrough, maybe best product ever created in history.
36:49
And now it would be absolute garbage compared to this phone.
36:55
The truth is, the same is true for your same life.
36:59
This iPhone is to the first iPhone what Allen, version 3.7 me now is to me at 17.
37:08
So.
37:08
So I never questioned whether or not we could win or succeed.
37:11
I knew people can build businesses, and I know that you can add value and generate revenue.
37:16
Like, I never questioned that, but I did question my approach and how long it would take.
37:23
Okay.
37:24
All right.
37:24
Well, Alan, I could certainly talk to you for a whole lot longer, but we're.
37:27
We're about at time here.
37:29
So for.
37:30
For people that are hearing this, other entrepreneurs, and you've.
37:33
You've broken down so much knowledge and so much of growing a success, successful company and a lot of other things that really aren't commonly talked about from.
37:44
From, you know, people that teach success, at least the ones I've interviewed or whatnot.
37:49
So people are hearing this and they want to learn more about your work, what you do, or check out your podcast.
37:54
What's the best way people can find you online?
37:56
Yeah, thank you for that.
37:57
I hope this was uniquely valuable for everybody.
38:00
At the end of the day, I don't think I'm.
38:02
Traditionally, I've struggled with not being a very likable guy, but I hope that you can see past that.
38:09
To, like, what I'm sharing, I do hope is very unique and something that you've never really heard in this way.
38:17
So thank you for having me.
38:18
Thank you for the opportunity.
38:19
I appreciate it.
38:19
And at the end of the day, I know that when you're more successful, assuming your goals are actually aligned with a win, win, win, win for you, win for others, win for the world, then you being more successful
38:30
and fulfilled is going to be a good thing.
38:31
That's what we need.
38:31
We need more fulfilled people who want to see others win.
38:35
And I think that's important.
38:36
So thank you for having me.
38:38
Where you can find me is nextleveluniverse.com Allen Lazarus on all social media, I really only use Instagram and Facebook at this stage, so Instagram, that will be me.
38:47
If you DM me, please provide context, obviously, because we all get a lot of spam.
38:53
And then the Next Level University podcast, it's success and personal development in your pocket every day from anywhere on the planet, completely free.
39:04
That is Next Level University.
39:06
And Kevin and I do an episode every day.
39:09
We have 2,350 episodes.
39:11
I think it's a little more than that now and it's 1% improvement every day in the areas that we believe matter to help you be healthier, wealthier and more in love.
39:22
Health, wealth and love are a byproduct.
39:24
They're not process.
39:25
They're an effect and not a cause.
39:27
So we focus on the causes that bring health, wealth and love.
39:31
And we hopefully are becoming the male role models that we never had because we both grew up without fathers.
39:35
So if you're interested in that and you have high humility and work ethic, here's what I'll warn everybody.
39:40
If you have low work ethic, don't reach out under any circumstance.
39:43
Nothing works if you don't work.
39:45
If you want big rewards for minimal effort, there's nothing I can do to help you.
39:53
Okay, well said.
39:54
We will link all those in the show notes and certainly appreciate your time.
39:58
Alan, thank you for sharing all this valuable wisdom from your journey with our listeners.
40:02
We greatly appreciate it.
40:03
Thank you.