Latest / Soul Salon with Ayandastood / The POWERFUL, FREE tool that REWIRES your NERVOUS SYSTEM | The Breathwork Breddah

Transcript

The POWERFUL, FREE tool that REWIRES your NERVOUS SYSTEM | The Breathwork Breddah · Soul Salon with Ayandastood

• 0:00
  If you're a little bit anxious, if you're a little bit stressed, if your headspace isn't clear, struggling to focus, all of these things are super, super, super tied to high ****.
• 0:07
  You can basically enter altered states of consciousness, like dreamlike states of creativity or like just through ****.
• 0:14
  It's just crazy.
• 0:16
  There's a type of breath work called ****.
• 0:17
  The shift was that moment.
• 0:18
  I was just like, how?
• 0:20
  Why has no one showed me it before?
• 0:22
  It's a passive thing we just do by nature.
• 0:25
  What are we missing?
• 0:25
  I think there's two things.
• 0:27
  Honestly, I think one is if you're in that fight or flight state, all your brain is thinking is get me the F out of here.
• 0:34
  Having the ability to put yourself in a calm state of mind beforehand clears your head.
• 0:38
  There's not a single person living that cannot benefit from using or having the ability to shift your internal state quickly, simply, easily.
• 0:49
  is so connected to sensuality, sexuality and pleasure.
• 0:53
  Like whether it's a four-play scenario or just sexual encounters, there's a massive, massive, massive place for...
• 1:08
  We want to welcome Dani to the Soul Salon, who goes by the Breathwork Brother on Instagram, which we're going to talk about that, about pulling in people to the conversation who are typically left out.
• 1:19
  But I'm so excited to chat to you about breathwork, neuroscience.
• 1:23
  If you could give us a little bit of like a intro to your world, to like what you think about how you work in the world, what lights you up, and then I'll ask you what the soul means to you.
• 1:32
  Okay, so my name is Danny.
• 1:34
  As you said, I go by the Breathwork Brother.
• 1:36
  I have recently left a corporate career.
• 1:39
  I was in it for about 10 years.
• 1:41
  Didn't like hate it, but just decided it wasn't for me.
• 1:44
  And I think if there's ever a point where you take a step back and realise the ladder you're on, you don't want to get to the top of it, I think just parachute off, which is kind of what I've done.
• 1:54
  um so now yeah i bop about teaching breathwork corporates brands events spaces talking about it um and i absolutely love it like literally i feel super blessed to be bopping around doing something that i'm super passionate about um and it's
• 2:13
  Like the classes, when you just watch someone come in, sometimes people come in carrying stuff or they're a bit stressed or anxious or whatever, and being able to give people the tools to go away and better manage that.
• 2:23
  Or, as we'll come on to later, there's a type of breathwork called conscious connected breathwork, which is like a factory reset on your entire mental.
• 2:30
  And watching people go through that experience is fascinating.
• 2:33
  And then because I'm a super nerd, I'm back at uni.
• 2:37
  Lovely.
• 2:37
  I just love what's going on.
• 2:40
  Beautiful.
• 2:40
  Beautiful.
• 2:41
  OK, so I love that you said you were in the corporate job.
• 2:43
  You didn't hate it, but you didn't love it.
• 2:45
  And now you're in something you absolutely love, which is so incredible.
• 2:48
  And so what would you say to someone who is in that position where they're kind of stuck in something that like it's good enough, you know, but it's not it's not I fucking love it, you know.
• 2:58
  It's hard.
• 2:59
  So I used to, the only other thing I've loved, loved, loved in my life is playing football.
• 3:03
  Wow.
• 3:03
  So when I was younger, like, I don't support football, I don't watch it, but just playing football, like, my heart, there's nothing more I've loved to do in my life.
• 3:11
  That didn't quite work out, but...
• 3:13
  The change point for me was I was in the bank and I was working, but on the side I was playing football at high standard and I had a few injuries.
• 3:23
  And after the third one, I remember being sat on my sofa like, okay, so this is it.
• 3:27
  My life is now just going into this bank and coming out of this bank without the sprinkling on the side of the thing that I love.
• 3:33
  And that was probably like 2019, 2020.
• 3:36
  So at that point, I really understood this can't be me forever.
• 3:40
  And...
• 3:42
  And then I tried a few little bits on the side, like, you know, you set up little companies and stuff and botting around.
• 3:46
  And I found it really hard to do that whilst doing a nine to five.
• 3:51
  And in banking, it's a bit longer than nine to five.
• 3:53
  And eventually I got to the point where I was like, I can't.
• 3:57
  I know I don't want to be at the ladder thing.
• 3:59
  I know I don't want to be on this ladder forever, but I don't hate it.
• 4:01
  So it's quite hard sometimes to leave the stability.
• 4:04
  So I took a sabbatical and I went traveling.
• 4:07
  And yeah, when I was on my sabbatical, I honestly got dragged to this teacher training by my ex-girlfriend.
• 4:13
  I didn't really resonate with breathwork.
• 4:15
  I had a little look at the space before.
• 4:16
  I was like, it doesn't really feel for me.
• 4:19
  Found this and then even after that, it's taken me probably another year or two to finally get out.
• 4:25
  So to circle back to your question, I think the first part is just stepping back and deciding if what you're doing is what you want to be doing.
• 4:33
  And the second part is even if you do end up deciding this isn't for me, I'm going to change.
• 4:37
  It still takes a little bit of time.
• 4:39
  So don't get frustrated with...
• 4:41
  I didn't know what it was I wanted to do.
• 4:43
  I just gave myself the space to let it come to me.
• 4:47
  So yeah, first is take a step back.
• 4:49
  Second is don't get frustrated if it takes a bit of time.
• 4:50
  Hmm.
• 4:51
  Oh, I love this so much.
• 4:52
  The patience.
• 4:53
  And also when you said the ladder and then realizing you don't want to get to the top.
• 4:56
  I also worked in corporate that resonates so deeply.
• 4:58
  It's like, I don't want that life.
• 5:00
  If that's what it means to succeed here, I don't want to succeed.
• 5:02
  So it's incredible that you got out of that situation.
• 5:05
  But it's not that fairy tale of like overnight.
• 5:07
  It takes time.
• 5:09
  It takes patience.
• 5:10
  And it takes like a sort of like, like you said, zooming out and finding your way and also following the path as it unfolds, which it sounds like.
• 5:17
  You know, you allowed your ex to guide you and, you know, and you found breathwork in your own way.
• 5:21
  What was that sort of, why breathwork?
• 5:23
  Like, how did that happen?
• 5:25
  So when I went to this teacher train, it was in South Africa.
• 5:28
  It was in South Africa.
• 5:29
  We can breathe.
• 5:31
  So it was like an hour north of the Cape Town in a citrus style.
• 5:36
  Gorgeous place.
• 5:37
  And again, I was traveling for 12 months.
• 5:38
  And at the time, my girlfriend, she was a yoga instructor.
• 5:41
  She tried to get me to go to breathwork before.
• 5:43
  I'd looked at it and been like...
• 5:45
  nah I don't want to do that um and then anyway the options were travel on my own for a month because we were traveling for a year and she was like I'm going to this thing travel on my own for a month or go and learn something new um and the learn something new kind of pulled me in but I was still a bit like like all I knew about breath work was like yeah you just sort of need to focus on your breathing a little bit and I'd heard of box breathing I was like how are they going to teach me to box breathe for a month like box breathing is super simple anyway I pulled up
• 6:13
  And day number one, we've done this thing.
• 6:15
  It's called Conscious Connected Breathwork.
• 6:16
  I don't know if you've ever done or experienced it before.
• 6:19
  And it was just crazy.
• 6:21
  Like, yeah.
• 6:23
  So the shift was that moment.
• 6:24
  I was just like, how can you breathe yourself into this headspace?
• 6:30
  Like, why has no one shown me it before?
• 6:33
  And then I started taking a step back and looking at the space.
• 6:36
  And I was like, why did I never come across this?
• 6:38
  Why didn't I interact with it?
• 6:39
  Yada, yada, yada.
• 6:40
  But it was that moment.
• 6:41
  It was just doing it.
• 6:42
  It was literally experiencing.
• 6:43
  I was like, I'm in.
• 6:44
  What is this?
• 6:45
  I need to do this.
• 6:46
  Wow.
• 6:46
  Oh my God, I have chills.
• 6:48
  What you said about breathing into a space that is like so profound.
• 6:52
  And the feeling of like, the resistance, the ego, like, I don't need this.
• 6:56
  This is beneath me in some way.
• 6:58
  I don't need to go learn how to breathe.
• 6:59
  We can all breathe.
• 7:00
  So take us there.
• 7:00
  I mean, so many.
• 7:01
  Well, 100%.
• 7:02
  That's literally what was going to be in my head.
• 7:05
  So what would you say to someone who's like, yeah, I mean, what is it?
• 7:08
  We all do it.
• 7:08
  Like, who feels like it's a passive thing.
• 7:10
  We just do by nature.
• 7:12
  What are we missing?
• 7:13
  I think there's two things.
• 7:14
  Honestly, I think one is you interact with spaces you see yourself in.
• 7:20
  And at the time, and still, I don't actually know of, I'm sure there are, I don't know of other mixed race or people of color or men in the breathwork.
• 7:29
  I know of other men in the breathwork space, but I don't know of other male practitioners of color in the breathwork space.
• 7:35
  Yeah.
• 7:36
  And I think there's a lot of other stuff along the side that is super useful in a certain capacity.
• 7:41
  But I think often when you're trying to get someone to try something that they're a little bit resistant of, you've got to kind of remove all the barriers where they might look at it and be like, I don't want to do that.
• 7:49
  So sometimes the more spiritual stuff can put people off.
• 7:52
  But I think there's a massive place for it.
• 7:55
  But yeah, I think when I looked at the space and I was a bit like, I don't know if I want to do this.
• 7:59
  And I know how to read exactly what you said.
• 8:02
  So yeah, I guess kind of what I'm trying to do is strip everything back and just,
• 8:08
  make the space feel more approachable to people who may...
• 8:11
  Be a little bit light.
• 8:13
  No, that's not really me.
• 8:14
  I think, again, sorry, I keep weaving around your questions.
• 8:17
  But to come back, I think the thing people miss is we just look, we overlook our breathing.
• 8:23
  We're not designed to think about it.
• 8:25
  I couldn't have this conversation with you or walk or play football if you're always like, breathe in, breathe out, breathe in.
• 8:29
  You just couldn't do anything.
• 8:30
  So we're designed not to think about it.
• 8:33
  We do it every day.
• 8:34
  So we think we're breathing okay.
• 8:36
  And no one's ever really put the emphasis on, oh, this actually controls.
• 8:39
  if you're a little bit anxious, if you're a little bit stressed, if your headspace isn't clear, if you're struggling to focus, all of these things are super, super, super tied to how you're breathing and we don't look at it.
• 8:48
  So I think we're designed to overlook it.
• 8:51
  Hmm.
• 8:52
  Wow.
• 8:54
  It's so fascinating.
• 8:56
  The two things you said.
• 8:57
  So first, that aspect of representation and not seeing people look like you, not seeing men of color in the space and feeling like it's amazing.
• 9:05
  I think that the human capacity to become the antidote, to become what we were seeking is so powerful.
• 9:12
  And I really celebrate people who do that, where there's a gap and you decide you're going to.
• 9:17
  sing into that void and be that change that you're seeking to see.
• 9:20
  And so I do want to go into that.
• 9:22
  And then the second part of what you said around that we're designed, I love that, to design to overlook it.
• 9:28
  It's not just like to go about our daily lives.
• 9:31
  We almost need to take it for granted, but then we can create these intentional spaces where we don't do that.
• 9:36
  And you're helping us like step into that a bit more.
• 9:39
  So I first want to go into like the representation.
• 9:41
  I think that's so important.
• 9:42
  So you came up with this name, the Breathwork Brother.
• 9:45
  And then,
• 9:46
  Tell us more about how that specific journey has been.
• 9:49
  Are you, is that mission being achieved?
• 9:52
  Who are you attracting into your work?
• 9:54
  Are you having those conversations that you wanted to have?
• 9:56
  I'm getting there.
• 9:57
  Okay.
• 9:57
  It's a process.
• 9:59
  I think there's two things you overcome with Breathwork.
• 10:01
  One is my, the thing that I had, you look at it and you're like, I don't need that.
• 10:05
  And it looks a bit not really for me.
• 10:09
  And the second is the getting more men and people of color into the space.
• 10:13
  I think it's,
• 10:16
  Wellness, I think, has two things.
• 10:18
  One, traditionally, I think, been quite a white dominated space.
• 10:24
  And female dominated.
• 10:26
  Women tend to be so much more in tune with I need.
• 10:29
  It's like women, I think, are way better at preemptively preventing themselves going down.
• 10:35
  Men tend to just bottle it all up and then have a breakdown.
• 10:37
  I think women do a lot more stuff with...
• 10:39
  So I think there's two things I'm trying to get over, which is one, get more men into the space and one, get more people to cover into the space.
• 10:45
  I definitely, in the right conversations, I'm in convos with amazing men's communities.
• 10:50
  And I've run a few classes specifically for men in communities, which I absolutely love.
• 10:55
  But yeah, I think there's two... People don't tend to look at breathwork and think that's...
• 11:01
  Almost like a cool thing to do.
• 11:02
  I don't know how weird that sounds to say, but...
• 11:06
  You have this, there's a lot of the marketing, which I really don't resonate with, which is like this trauma healing.
• 11:11
  You need this to like, and a lot of people that are practitioners have come through, like, let's say had a really, um,
• 11:21
  big event that's happened to them which might have been traumatic or they were depressed or had the loss of someone or like there's a lot of things going on and people seem to go to breath work as like a last resort like i've tried all this i've done this it's not really working these um medicines or pills or like therapy it's not really getting me there and they tend to reach for the more esoteric the more niche things at that moment and then whoever whenever you try it you're like
• 11:45
  this is what I needed all along.
• 11:47
  And a lot of people come from that space where they've maybe, for me, again, I didn't, I got dragged there.
• 11:53
  I like hop, skipped and fell into the space accidentally.
• 11:57
  Yeah.
• 11:59
  So yeah, I kind of want it to, I basically want to make it a place where people look at and they're like, oh, that's a cool space.
• 12:04
  I want to go and do that rather than thinking, oh, there's this thing wrong with me and I need to go and do this to, you can like preemptively just put yourself in a better headspace for everything.
• 12:14
  There's loads and loads of professional athletes doing it for sports performance to lock in at the right moment.
• 12:19
  There's like the benefits are just so, I just think it's got a PR.
• 12:25
  I don't know if it's issue, but that's the kind of thing that I'm trying to shift the narrative on.
• 12:30
  Almost a little bit like, I don't know how old you are, but when I was growing up, running wasn't a cool thing to do.
• 12:36
  It was just a bit like, and all the clothing was super garish and bright coloured and runners.
• 12:42
  And now all of a sudden, running is the hottest...
• 12:44
  There's brands in the space, there's activations, all the clothes are starting to be super cool.
• 12:48
  I think there's like a room for wellness to have that shift.
• 12:51
  And I would love to be part of that conversation that brings it one more mainstream and one people look at it like, that's something I would love to be a part of and that's something I want to be.
• 13:00
  And then when you get there and try it, the benefits speak for themselves.
• 13:04
  There's no way you come and try it and don't be like, yeah, I should be doing this more.
• 13:08
  Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh.
• 13:09
  Yes, I want to go there with the benefits.
• 13:12
  But the things you're saying about the two sort of hurdles you're facing with, you know, getting more men and getting more people of color in.
• 13:19
  And I feel like this is like a, you know, it's a life mission.
• 13:23
  It's not like a, you know, overnight thing.
• 13:24
  So I think the fact that you're dedicated to this and also what you're saying about what's happening with running.
• 13:29
  And we've seen many of these like wellness challenges.
• 13:32
  um moments i feel like where people more people are part of this like movement and i i think with breathing it's so like it's such an intimate place that we can we can all tap into i love what you said about like finding a way to make it more almost like cool desirable to do like oh let's go like that's like a sunday morning thing that we do together as we breathe together so anyways
• 13:52
  But I love the weaving.
• 13:54
  I also weave.
• 13:54
  So I think that's so fascinating.
• 13:56
  But you spoke about the moment you had in South Africa with conscious connected breath.
• 13:59
  Now you're saying there's no way once you do it that you won't feel the benefits.
• 14:03
  So take us there for someone who's like, what benefits?
• 14:07
  What could it possibly do to like breathe differently?
• 14:10
  Can you take us into what those benefits of breath work are?
• 14:13
  100% there's two sides of breath work, right?
• 14:16
  Like you've got two sides of your nervous system.
• 14:18
  So you've got this one side of your nervous system that's like rest and digest, super calm, super chilling, calm yourself down.
• 14:25
  Take all the energy you have and internalize it to repair and heal.
• 14:28
  And there's this other side of your nervous system that is take all the energy you have and externalize it.
• 14:32
  So it's fight or flight and you're looking to...
• 14:35
  historically just survive you need to run or flee or fight for something um and in the same fashion we have two sides of breath work so one is down regulating super calm super chilled if you're stressing before a big meeting or having a tough conversation or you're just generally like london life's crazy right you're just getting on the tube or you're bopping you just go here here here like your baseline level of stress just slowly creeps up and up and up
• 15:00
  And this down-regulating side of breathwork Will just bring that baseline down You will just feel more calm day-to-day You'll be less emotionally reactive Which is massive Especially in the workplace Like you're normally snapping at your boss It's almost like You know when you're hungry Well, when I used to get hungry I used to be way more snappy And you know you're like Okay, so I need to just Eat a little bit throughout the morning So that I'm not cussing out my boss by 11am Breathwork's a little bit the same Like
• 15:28
  We don't think about our breathing, but whenever you breathe in through your mouth and up into your chest, you're ever so slightly activating the agitated side of your nervous system.
• 15:37
  And it will just put you in a more reactive space.
• 15:39
  And with breathing practices, like five minutes daily in the morning and little times where you just check in and maybe you take a deep breath in and just side out through your mouth.
• 15:50
  You just settle your system.
• 15:52
  And when you build this and weave this in, again, just one week, two weeks, three weeks, you'll just start to feel yourself more calm, less reactive.
• 16:00
  There's also massive benefits with you train your body to manage your blood pressure better.
• 16:06
  You do reduce your stress hormone.
• 16:08
  It's called cortisol.
• 16:11
  But more than me talking through, you just feel like, when you do it, you're just like, okay, I just feel way better after doing this.
• 16:20
  And that's the power.
• 16:20
  That's what I mean.
• 16:21
  Once you get people in the door, then everyone's like, okay, bro, I need to start doing this.
• 16:26
  And that's the downregulating side.
• 16:27
  The other side is crazy.
• 16:30
  So, conscious connected breathwork, which he said he's done.
• 16:33
  So, my entire master's dissertation was...
• 16:36
  So the whole thing that I'm doing my thesis on is comparing, I'm going to call it CCB, Conscious Connected Breathwork, CCB, versus the felt experience of taking psychedelics.
• 16:46
  Wow.
• 16:47
  So the subjective experience of the two of them, there's loads of overlap.
• 16:51
  You can basically enter altered states of consciousness, almost like dreamlike states of creativity or like just through breathing, which again is just crazy and it's quite hard to explain it.
• 17:06
  you kind of and this is why it starts to domino because people come to especially that class is why i originally started teaching people come they go away they're like this was mad but you can't fully explain what's just happened so that like you actually just have to come through to this class and then they go away and bring and then it just starts to ripple out yeah
• 17:25
  Word of mouth, baby.
• 17:26
  Yes.
• 17:27
  Oh, my gosh.
• 17:27
  Wow.
• 17:28
  What you just described.
• 17:29
  It is crazy.
• 17:29
  I was just telling my friend that I feel like when I have done those experiences, there's like I'm like a mermaid.
• 17:35
  I'm in the water.
• 17:36
  Like there's like a spirit thing happening.
• 17:38
  I feel like there's so much that happens.
• 17:40
  And I feel like you said, you can only explain experience it by experiencing it.
• 17:44
  And I think it's so cool that you're doing your dissertation on that comparison and the felt experiences of both.
• 17:50
  And I mean, what a world if like we can all access, like you said earlier, breathe into altered states of consciousness through this tool that we all have.
• 17:58
  It gives me chills thinking about it.
• 18:00
  What is your hope?
• 18:01
  Like if you envision a society where breathwork has become like running or like any of these other like, what is your dream of like how that would be?
• 18:10
  What do you see as a future, like a sci-fi future in a good way of what role breathing could play in our lives?
• 18:18
  Yeah, I mean, I only see it going on the ascendancy.
• 18:20
  I don't see how.
• 18:22
  Wellness as a space is just blowing up.
• 18:24
  Like we're becoming so much more attuned or understanding that we need to look after.
• 18:29
  Like we have this one body and we need to actually look after it.
• 18:33
  But as I was just saying, I think a lot of it comes down to nervous system regulation.
• 18:39
  Yeah.
• 18:40
  So I think breathing is one of the best ways we have it.
• 18:44
  But we talk about running, just a great way to exercise, releasing endorphins, calling your mum or a family member.
• 18:50
  Do you know what I mean?
• 18:51
  There are all these little random acts of kindness, buying a homeless person a sandwich or a meal deal or like all these different things are ways to settle and regulate your nervous system.
• 19:03
  I just think breathing is one of the best and most direct ways we have.
• 19:09
  And I think in a world where we all have more regulated nervous systems, you will just, as we said, like not snapping at different people, less anger, less road rage on the streets.
• 19:20
  So what this person cut you off is not actually that deep.
• 19:22
  But you have that capacity to think like that when you integrate these practices into your life daily.
• 19:28
  And I just think that with breathing, because it's so accessible,
• 19:32
  You don't need fancy equipment.
• 19:33
  You can do it anywhere.
• 19:34
  It's on you all the time.
• 19:36
  You've got your nose on you, hopefully, all the time.
• 19:38
  Hopefully.
• 19:40
  And I think because of that, it's a great on-ramp.
• 19:45
  We're getting told by everyone you should journal and do stretching and do all this sort of stuff, like...
• 19:50
  Stacking them all is too much.
• 19:51
  You should have a herbal tea.
• 19:52
  You should not do your, like, there's so many different ways.
• 19:55
  I just think breathing is the most accessible.
• 19:57
  And I think in the future where it doesn't necessarily have to be breath work, but I think the future will have, we will have better tools or we will have a better understanding of the need to have a regulated nervous system.
• 20:09
  And I think breathing is just one of the best ways to do it.
• 20:13
  Yes.
• 20:14
  Oh, my gosh.
• 20:14
  You're taking us there.
• 20:15
  Oh, my word.
• 20:16
  I love the also the two, the downregulating and the upregulating and the parasympathetic nervous system and the sympathetic nervous system.
• 20:23
  What you said about like upregulating, downregulating.
• 20:26
  If someone's like, I know we'll get into this, but they're like, OK, I believe you.
• 20:30
  I'm going to bring this into my life for five minutes, though.
• 20:33
  I'm like, what would you have them do?
• 20:35
  Yeah, so my favourite, I do this every single class I teach.
• 20:40
  I do this.
• 20:40
  It's called Coherence Breathing.
• 20:42
  And it is five minutes.
• 20:45
  So you set a timer on your phone, five minutes.
• 20:48
  You put, rather than playing like a bell at the end of it, you can put... Stop sound.
• 20:51
  You can put stop sound.
• 20:54
  When I told my mom and brother that, they were like, what?
• 20:56
  They were like, their mind was blown.
• 20:58
  It's amazing.
• 20:59
  Yes.
• 21:00
  We did it at...
• 21:00
  Yes, it was incredible.
• 21:01
  Yes, definitely.
• 21:02
  I'll tell, I'll speak about how I felt in it.
• 21:04
  But yes, please continue.
• 21:05
  So Coherence Breathe in five minutes.
• 21:07
  You go on, there's a specific song that you play that has two bells to it.
• 21:10
  There's a higher chime.
• 21:12
  You breathe in on the higher chime.
• 21:14
  You breathe out on the lower chime.
• 21:15
  You run it for five minutes.
• 21:16
  Yeah.
• 21:17
  breathing super gently super soft and again the benefits it reduces your stress hormone cortisol which is just great for you it improves something called your heart rate variability which like a buzzword it's like a marker of help um when you switch yourself into the you said parasympathetic i always just call it like the chill side because sometimes people get a bit on the words but yeah basically if you switch yourself to the chill side of your nervous system
• 21:42
  You give yourself the capacity to, when you reduce your stress hormone, you take all the energy you have, your internalizing it, you can boost all of your happy hormones, so like serotonin, oxytocin, all the things that make you feel good.
• 21:55
  And yeah, as a daily stress management tool is unparalleled.
• 22:00
  I think I said this at Zorro House, I got super gassed at the end of last year because...
• 22:04
  So I was at ASICS Tuesday, Wednesday this week.
• 22:08
  Again, run this, breathing practice.
• 22:10
  And every single...
• 22:11
  I've got people messaging me this morning for the song.
• 22:14
  Because everyone that comes and does it, everyone's like, what was this song?
• 22:17
  And how do we do this and this and this?
• 22:19
  And when people start weaving it into their daily lives, you just feel...
• 22:22
  So yeah, I detoured, but I had people at the end of last year messaging me because it was top of their Spotify raps.
• 22:27
  Oh, yes.
• 22:28
  Which, how good is that?
• 22:29
  So good.
• 22:30
  And I haven't seen these people.
• 22:31
  I've seen these people like once in class.
• 22:32
  And then seven months later, everyone's just, I know they're at home waking up, having their coffee and just running this practice, which is sick.
• 22:38
  That is so cool.
• 22:39
  Your impact.
• 22:39
  Coherence breathing.
• 22:40
  That is the five minute.
• 22:43
  Run it.
• 22:43
  Run it.
• 22:44
  Okay.
• 22:44
  Run it.
• 22:45
  Okay, incredible.
• 22:45
  So everyone, yes, I went to an event that Dani was a panelist on at Soho House.
• 22:52
  And it was about dopamine detoxing in the nervous system.
• 22:55
  And it was so fascinating.
• 22:56
  And hence, here we are.
• 22:57
  But one of the practices that Dani had us do was this link, which we will put the link to the sound below.
• 23:03
  And it was so cool because not only did I feel within myself this sense of regulation, but this collective feeling of doing it together.
• 23:10
  So we are going to invite you to like do this daily, but also to do it with your friends, like ask your friend, like, could we just do something for five minutes?
• 23:18
  Or I just imagine couples like in a fight being like, OK, let's pause.
• 23:22
  Let's do this for five minutes and then let's come back.
• 23:24
  Because so often it's just like you were saying, it's like the what you said about cutting someone cutting you off.
• 23:30
  It's like you need that space and breathwork really creates that spaciousness.
• 23:34
  And also makes you feel like similar to like psychedelic experiences, like oneness.
• 23:38
  Like when you breathe with someone, you're like co-regulating, I'm sure.
• 23:41
  Right.
• 23:41
  Like imagine a world where we just did that more.
• 23:44
  It would be so amazing.
• 23:45
  Hence what you're doing.
• 23:46
  Yeah.
• 23:48
  And I think on that, like there's a massive drive or again, I think there's like buzzwordy moments, but to be in the present moment.
• 23:57
  And something you just said there, I think it just like.
• 24:00
  often our mind is not where our body is.
• 24:05
  So you're always thinking forward to, I need to be here and do this or get here.
• 24:09
  Or you're thinking back on like a moment you just had or something you said to someone or what do they think about this?
• 24:14
  And like, we spend so much of our time thinking forward or thinking back almost.
• 24:19
  And the way I see that is like, sometimes life can go super quick or you feel like you're on fast forward or you're just blitzing through.
• 24:25
  And you know, like when you're watching a film, obviously if you put it on fast forward,
• 24:30
  blurs, rewind, blurs.
• 24:32
  And I think sometimes when we feel like we're moving through life in a haze, that's kind of what we're doing because our body's trying to catch up to where our mind is.
• 24:39
  And I just think, like, you can call it pulling you into the present moment, but I almost just think about, like, just pressing play on the film.
• 24:45
  Hmm.
• 24:47
  a line in your mind to where your body is.
• 24:50
  And I think at that point, because it forces you to focus on something you're doing in this moment, right?
• 24:54
  Because it's your breathing.
• 24:55
  You have to bring yourself into this moment.
• 24:57
  And I think like even when you're in an argument, as you were just saying, often you don't even listen to that person.
• 25:02
  You're just in your mind, here's what I'm going to say.
• 25:04
  As soon as I get a chance to pause, this is what I'm going to say.
• 25:06
  And I think anything that hard forces you into this moment is amazing for you.
• 25:13
  Mmm, that's so powerful.
• 25:14
  Yeah, you're in the argument, you're thinking about what you're going to say, or you're feeling completely triggered and like you're a five-year-old child and you're dead.
• 25:21
  It's like, so yeah, pressing play, I really love that analogy.
• 25:24
  So it's like, okay, we're not, we're so used to, we're letting our body, did you say mind catch up to body, body catch up to... Just align them in the same space, yeah.
• 25:32
  Like an eclipse.
• 25:33
  I think so.
• 25:34
  Because your body's always in the present moment.
• 25:36
  Right.
• 25:36
  Often you're just executing automatic tasks that you know how to do stuff.
• 25:40
  And your mind's, again, thinking forward or worrying on the past.
• 25:43
  And I think when you bring the two into alignment, I think that's what people feel when they're like, lock yourself into the present moment.
• 25:51
  And I think breathing forces you to do that.
• 25:54
  Okay, so it's called coherence breathing.
• 25:57
  What is coherence?
• 25:58
  Coherence.
• 26:02
  6'5", you might hear it called.
• 26:05
  Coherence is you put yourself in a state of heart coherence.
• 26:08
  So you have these two sides of our nervous system that we keep talking about.
• 26:12
  And at this, so it's about five and a half breaths per minute.
• 26:15
  Okay.
• 26:16
  Okay.
• 26:17
  If you want to get into heart coherence at a slightly different frequency, you'd have to measure your own.
• 26:21
  But roughly, if you go on that song, you'll get there.
• 26:24
  And yeah, you basically balance both sides of your nervous system, which is amazing.
• 26:30
  And put your heart, your mind and your body in a state of coherence.
• 26:33
  So it's almost like a line in frequencies.
• 26:36
  Not almost, it is a line in the frequencies.
• 26:39
  So that's why it's called coherence.
• 26:40
  It's also called 365, but that's a more practical.
• 26:42
  You're supposed to do it three times a day.
• 26:44
  Okay.
• 26:45
  Because the benefits last like three to six hours, like four hours, basically.
• 26:49
  So you're supposed to do it three times a day.
• 26:52
  It's about six breaths per minute and you do it for five minutes.
• 26:55
  That's why it's 365.
• 26:56
  But the coherence is basically a line in the frequencies.
• 26:59
  It's called the resonant frequency.
• 27:02
  Beautiful.
• 27:03
  And I remember you speaking on a podcast about the spiritual aspect of that.
• 27:07
  Can you share that?
• 27:08
  I think you just feel it, but in the spiritual side, yeah.
• 27:13
  I mean, there's loads going back through.
• 27:15
  So all the breathing stuff originated way out in the East, where they've been doing it.
• 27:19
  So we've come, it's getting westernized, and we've kind of discovered it recently.
• 27:27
  But yeah, when you breathe this way and align both sides of your nervous system and breathe a lot slower, you'll clear your heads.
• 27:33
  And when you have a much more clearer headspace, you give yourself the capacity to really experience and feel.
• 27:39
  Yeah.
• 27:41
  But yeah, a lot on the, so conscious connected breath work, I'd say, is where you go more into the spiritual realm.
• 27:48
  Coherence breathing is more, yeah, just, it's almost like setting a veil of calm on your body.
• 27:55
  I think you were sharing that in many spiritual traditions, it was like that pattern of breathing.
• 28:01
  Oh, sorry.
• 28:02
  So across loads of different religious modalities, they have discovered that whether you're singing the Santa Maria or hymn songs or chanting in loads of different multitude of religious practices, it ends up standardizing your breathing to about five to six breaths per minute.
• 28:22
  Wow.
• 28:23
  So that sense of bliss or that sense of calm that often you can get when you're in those spaces and when you're participating collectively in whatever it might be, again, it doesn't matter whether it's Christian or Muslim or Sikh or anything.
• 28:33
  Yeah, they did a load of studies and realized that they were essentially harmonizing their breathing to about the resonant frequency, which is mad.
• 28:42
  That's mad.
• 28:44
  Wow.
• 28:44
  So everyone, when you're doing the Spotify link, you're going to feel the power of every religious faith.
• 28:50
  Yeah.
• 28:51
  going through your body, okay?
• 28:53
  That's amazing.
• 28:54
  I mean, I'm so in awe of that.
• 28:55
  And like the idea that it's called the resonant frequency, the idea that it aligns so much in the body, you said, like the mind-body's heart, and then also that it is resonant with all these different people who didn't know each other, didn't have the internet.
• 29:09
  Like it's just a human thing, you said.
• 29:10
  And I also love that you've shared, like we just have to do it to know what it means.
• 29:14
  Like it's not, you can't access it through like studying it.
• 29:17
  It's like feel it.
• 29:18
  So we're all going to feel into that.
• 29:20
  That is so beautiful.
• 29:21
  I wanted to ask you about the soul.
• 29:23
  That's what I normally start with, but I also like to be present to what's emerging.
• 29:27
  So I don't know what your sort of, we all relate to this reality very differently.
• 29:31
  So that's beautiful.
• 29:32
  But what does the soul mean to you, if anything?
• 29:35
  Yeah, I think the soul to me is, I think it's just, it contains the magic of life.
• 29:53
  So much of us as humans are always trying to get answers on like, this is this and this is this and this is this.
• 29:59
  And I think everything that's not unexplained, but everything that captures the magic of who we are and how we came to be is encapsulated by those like intuitions where you think, oh, maybe I should take this path or, um, yeah, when you see that person that you fall in love with or your family or whatever, I think that driving force behind us is what I would describe.
• 30:26
  Wow.
• 30:28
  Can you say that again?
• 30:28
  The magic of?
• 30:30
  I think it's the magic of.
• 30:34
  Honestly, life, to be honest.
• 30:36
  The magic of life.
• 30:37
  It's the magic of life.
• 30:38
  The unexplainable.
• 30:39
  Especially for people, those of us, which you also are, like, love studying and learning, there is that inexplicable part and being in touch with that reverence for, like, the unknown, the mystery of life.
• 30:51
  That's beautiful.
• 30:51
  It really resonates with me as well.
• 30:54
  Hmm.
• 30:55
  So then what do you think is the relationship between the breath and the soul?
• 30:59
  So I think it allows us to connect.
• 31:01
  Hmm.
• 31:03
  I think we've got this like dualism in us that's always like, which is the whole thing I'm studying.
• 31:08
  Like there's been this body and mind disconnect.
• 31:13
  That's almost like scientifically imparted on us for however long.
• 31:19
  And in a lot of these wellness practices, they say that yoga, there's a lot of breath work in yoga, but yoga is for your body, meditation for the mind, and your breath kind of weaves the two together.
• 31:29
  And I think it's the same in, I think...
• 31:34
  Yeah, I think the thread that makes us human or links everything together is our breathing.
• 31:40
  I think it links bodies to mind.
• 31:41
  I think if you are yet...
• 31:45
  Because there's stuff where you're like, I find it mad that all the atmosphere and all the air that we breathe is the same that everyone else has breathed forever.
• 31:52
  It's the same that animals and plants and everything.
• 31:54
  I think you're the air, let's say, but the stuff that you're breathing and how obviously we obviously need to survive and to live.
• 32:02
  I find it mad that it connects.
• 32:05
  us way more than we actually believe or know or understand at the moment when you were talking earlier about co-regulation and just being in a room with someone that's calming will instantly put you at ease just being in a room with someone that's a bit tense and agitated will do the same thing but we've been in this room for an hour together and all we're doing is breathing the same like it's just
• 32:26
  I think we're so much more connected.
• 32:27
  It's almost an avatar-y.
• 32:28
  We're so much more, do you know what I mean?
• 32:29
  Yeah.
• 32:30
  And I think the one thread that weaves everything together is that, if you want to call it life force or people call it chi, I think it's, people call it the breath, but I don't actually love that as a phrase.
• 32:41
  I just think it sounds a little bit more, I'll just say it's your breathing or the air that we breathe, but I think that's the link.
• 32:51
  wow that we're connected through all of history this has been the same atmosphere the same air that is so profound like everyone that's ever lived oh that's magical and the way that language captures that because we have like in English there's like spirit and inspiration and that feeling of
• 33:16
  The breath being connected to this, yes, this life force energy in my native language, which I don't speak, but I'm learning.
• 33:23
  Umoya is the wind, but it's also spirit.
• 33:27
  And so it's like, it's also, I think it's also breath.
• 33:30
  Oh my God, guys, don't, don't make fun of me.
• 33:32
  I'm trying.
• 33:32
  I'm trying.
• 33:34
  But it's like it's definitely captured like that same thing that that is in Zulu that in Isi Zulu that like is capturing this like wind is spirit is breath is also in spirit and in like many different of those languages.
• 33:47
  So it's so magical.
• 33:48
  It's so powerful.
• 33:50
  And the fact that it connects us all, it's so beautiful.
• 33:52
  And if it's like the thing that we are both.
• 33:56
  guardians of, you know, like what we should be is like clean air, but I mean the world.
• 34:03
  Wow.
• 34:03
  You said that you don't like the idea of the breath.
• 34:06
  Can you tell us more about that?
• 34:07
  You know what?
• 34:08
  I just don't.
• 34:09
  As we were just talking about at the start, I'm very, I'm learning, but
• 34:15
  I'm sorting out my branding.
• 34:16
  Because the Breathwork Brother is a brand, right?
• 34:18
  But it's a personal brand.
• 34:20
  And I really want to... We talked about at the start about on-ramps and hurdles for people coming in.
• 34:26
  So anywhere where I sort of like pull back ever so slightly, I try and change.
• 34:31
  And I get feedback and I talk to people.
• 34:33
  I remember the first ever corporate I went into, I was talking about parasympathetic and sympathetic nervous system.
• 34:37
  And I was like, have you got any feedback for me?
• 34:39
  He's like, I think maybe you went too sciencey, which is why I start going...
• 34:42
  chill side of your nervous system agitate side like and the reels that i put out on insta the educational reels anywhere where i'm like i don't even say actually consciously breathe anymore i say moments where it'd be good to think about your breathing because even you could just be like what's a conscious breath anywhere where someone could be like
• 35:02
  What does that mean?
• 35:03
  Or what?
• 35:03
  Do you know what I mean?
• 35:04
  Like we have.
• 35:05
  No, we have.
• 35:06
  I did 10 years trading, right?
• 35:09
  Trading is complicated for sure.
• 35:11
  But it's way more complicated because it's got its own language.
• 35:15
  So I traded derivatives.
• 35:17
  Someone's like, what's a derivative?
• 35:19
  Like, oh, it's like a financial contract or an interest rate swap.
• 35:23
  Like what's a financial contract or an interest rate swap?
• 35:26
  It's something used to hedge risk.
• 35:27
  Like what's hedge risk?
• 35:28
  And it's like, it's questions all the way down.
• 35:31
  Yeah.
• 35:31
  Because half of the battle is understanding the lingo.
• 35:34
  And I think it's a little bit the same in the breathwork space.
• 35:36
  You get people that are
• 35:38
  There are classes that are called like constellation breathing and like everything's transcendental.
• 35:45
  I couldn't tell you what transcendental means.
• 35:47
  And every time, and I'm working the space, right?
• 35:49
  So I'm like, I kind of, for some reason, I just don't love the phrase, the breath.
• 35:55
  And loads of people use it and it should be used in different, but it's just part of my branding as I'm trying to really strip it back to, I think sometimes when you step into a space, you can get moulded by the space.
• 36:05
  And I would just want to bring my whole...
• 36:09
  I didn't interact with the space before I experienced it.
• 36:13
  So I really want to bring everything that is just me into the space that involves dressing how I want to dress, like talking how I want to talk.
• 36:22
  And probably there are some parts where you're going to have to use your language to align with, but I kind of want to pull back from anywhere where I'm a bit like, I don't know, I don't know why I don't like the breath.
• 36:30
  It's just the sounds of it.
• 36:31
  I don't know, it just sounds a bit like, I don't know.
• 36:35
  Yeah, I think that's, yeah, that's...
• 36:39
  The image that came to me as you were saying that is kind of like a gate.
• 36:42
  And so like you have what resonates with you and what doesn't.
• 36:46
  So when you get that feeling of like kind of like maybe the ick or like it pulls away in a way, it's important for you to listen to that because that's how you then are the gateway that you're supposed to be for all the people who are going to resonate with you.
• 36:58
  And so like by you being in tune with what resonates and what doesn't, there's like a broader like collective purpose of like if you use that kind of language,
• 37:06
  that guy or that person who is already put off by the space isn't going to step through the gate.
• 37:11
  And so I feel like we all have that, I feel like it's like a puzzle piece and you have to be the piece you're meant to be for other people to click into your piece.
• 37:20
  You know, otherwise...
• 37:23
  It just will create that same feeling of like, that's not for me.
• 37:26
  And most people don't have a girlfriend who's going to drag them to South Africa, like take them.
• 37:30
  Like you said, like you, you, you fell into it in such a specific way.
• 37:33
  So I think that's, I mean, that's powerful.
• 37:35
  I feel like we all get to find what language resonates.
• 37:38
  And I think we all struggle with like, even with what you call this.
• 37:42
  There's many things where I'm like, that word doesn't resonate with me.
• 37:44
  That word doesn't.
• 37:45
  So we're all finding our way.
• 37:47
  But I do believe that that branding question definitely serves a much higher.
• 37:52
  It serves a broader purpose.
• 37:54
  So I think it's beautiful that you're sitting with that voice.
• 37:58
  I think it's also like an authenticity piece.
• 38:01
  Because I remember, and I spoke about this actually before, when I first started my Instagram, which was a couple of years ago now,
• 38:12
  And I had like a picture of me on a mountain and there was like a thing going around me.
• 38:16
  And I was just bouncing an idea off one of my friends.
• 38:19
  And he's like, why have you called yourself the breathwork brother?
• 38:21
  And I was like, I wanted it to be catchy and I wanted it to feel like it was for the culture.
• 38:25
  And I wanted it to feel a little bit different than one breath feel bliss or whatever else people are calling themselves.
• 38:31
  Because that's how it feels more authentic to me.
• 38:33
  And he was like, well, there are loads of people in the breathwork space.
• 38:36
  And when you join a space, you start to see everyone, right?
• 38:38
  It starts to feel like everyone's doing breathwork.
• 38:40
  Most people.
• 38:41
  The whole world's doing this.
• 38:43
  And then he was like, well, do you want to be just another, not just another, sorry, that's so dismissive.
• 38:47
  Do you want to be another breathwork person or do you want to lean into the breader side of...
• 38:52
  Why do you call yourself that?
• 38:53
  And what is that for?
• 38:54
  And do you want to... Because he was like, I've known you for 10 years.
• 38:58
  I know you as the football person or we go out or we just faff about.
• 39:03
  He's like, this really isn't you sat here with a gong in the background on a mountain saying, calm down.
• 39:07
  Like you as a person, you're calming for sure.
• 39:11
  And being around you is calming.
• 39:12
  And I've been to your classes.
• 39:13
  You're very good at what you do.
• 39:15
  But...
• 39:16
  This that you've got, this image that you've got right now, this was probably three, four posts in.
• 39:20
  I went, I cleared my whole Insta.
• 39:21
  I changed how I wrote my captions.
• 39:24
  I changed the music I was putting on.
• 39:25
  Like, I was like, you're right.
• 39:26
  I actually want to be me in this space.
• 39:29
  And the reason, as we've been talking throughout, I think there's so, everyone has their niche.
• 39:35
  And I think there's massive space for the really spiritual people.
• 39:37
  There's massive space for the...
• 39:39
  retreats and the men's things where people are shouting and crying, but that's not where I resonated with.
• 39:45
  And that's not where I want to spend my time or hang out.
• 39:48
  And then I want to build a, I want to, if you're going to quit corporate and go and build your own life, you might as well do it exactly how, in the exact fashion you want to do it.
• 39:57
  So I think it's also an authenticity piece.
• 39:59
  Like it's so easy to get pulled into.
• 40:03
  I actually don't even follow loads of breathwork accounts.
• 40:06
  Mm-hmm.
• 40:07
  follow some but again i think i just want to just stay super true to how i feel how i bop about life how i do whatever because otherwise i think you get influenced by and then it's not a bad thing like you should always be influenced by the people around you and the people in the space but again i think i had a cool super cool conversation with someone one time and he was like you're going out on your own and it's uncertain and
• 40:37
  like life can be a bit scary in those moments but if you knew the exact path on where you were going it's not yours someone else has trodden it and i really feel like that in the breathwork space the the the same way as there isn't different like i know different girls and different boys and whatever and they're all doing slightly different things there's not another one of them in the space there's not another person there's not another me in the space so
• 41:03
  I really want to push the boundary on what a wellness person.
• 41:08
  So why can't a wellness, not why can't, but someone asked me this over there, like, where do you want to go with it?
• 41:13
  So why can't a wellness or a breathwork coach be signed to a music label?
• 41:17
  Oh, period.
• 41:19
  Why can't you be signed to an F1 team or a football team or whatever it is, like all these people that.
• 41:25
  get nerves before you go on stage and need to be in the right frame of mind and need a clear head and there are breathwork coaches i know really successful ones that just do like ceos and again that's still not quite my where i want to go but i'm just want to just i don't know what it looks like but i want to push the boat out and i think again we've weaved a lot but it's just to go back to i think being who you are and knowing who you are really trying to stick to that and being surrounded by good people that are like
• 41:51
  Is this still who you want to be and what you're because I can feel you shift and sometimes you do need to shift and adapt and grow, but it just needs to be in the right.
• 42:00
  So that's that's kind of where I'm coming back to the language and the brand and the vernacular.
• 42:06
  That's brilliant.
• 42:06
  Oh, my word.
• 42:07
  And having that person in your life who can really call you in, call you out, whatever, and be like, this isn't you.
• 42:12
  Like, you, I love you.
• 42:13
  And I want to see you in what you're sharing.
• 42:16
  And being true to you.
• 42:17
  That's really, it's really like also compassionate to yourself to be.
• 42:23
  believe that who you are is more than enough and you don't have to mold yourself to anything else.
• 42:28
  And I also love what you said about like, what's the point of like leaving 10 years in trading, like doing this and then just copying other people like that, doing things that don't feel like fully you, you might as well go all in on like your own vision, your own, you know, sense of like resonance and alignment.
• 42:44
  Hmm.
• 42:45
  Wow.
• 42:47
  Is there anything you would say to someone who is doing that right now, who's like maybe they just started something and they are looking everywhere else but within to sort of resource that inspiration or what they're supposed to put out into the world?
• 43:00
  It's so hard, you know, because like I was just saying, you get pulled and you don't notice it.
• 43:05
  I didn't even notice until someone put me back.
• 43:08
  So I think one is just asking you or like, I think feedback is the best.
• 43:12
  The people you trust the most in the world, just be like, what do you think of this in a true sense?
• 43:16
  And then it's just keep adapting and evolving.
• 43:18
  Like I said, I didn't even realize I didn't like the phrase, the breath until like a couple of weeks ago.
• 43:23
  And I don't use it, but...
• 43:25
  I've written, someone had me on doing some blog questions and I was like, I actually hate the way this sounds.
• 43:31
  And then just reflecting and being introspective and like, why is that?
• 43:33
  Like what?
• 43:34
  And I also think it's super important that I really have a clear mission.
• 43:40
  Like I definitely feel like I want to get more people of colour into the breathwork space.
• 43:47
  is a big men especially and people of color into the breathwork space a lot of my classes when i just sell them like i've got a lot of friends and family and people obviously but in general with this the the composition is still predominantly white women which i obviously love i love teaching breathwork to everyone but i think again sometimes it just takes a little while to slowly shift
• 44:13
  And just for people to be like, oh, this is a space that is for me, almost.
• 44:17
  So that's a real strong mission plan of mine.
• 44:21
  The other is, as we're talking about, I don't really, you can't really say I want to make a space cool because by definition, you do not cool.
• 44:27
  But you know what I mean?
• 44:28
  I kind of want to, I don't know what that means, but I want it to be a space where people's like, that's an environment I just want to go and hang out.
• 44:34
  There are sick people doing sick things.
• 44:35
  There are...
• 44:36
  Flip Nose is a brands coming in that are doing cool clothing just for like someone starts a wellness wardrobe like men still wear sweaty gym shark tees to breathwork classes.
• 44:47
  Why don't you align what you wear to the headspace that you want to be in?
• 44:51
  Like there's loads of you know, I mean, there's like so much you can do with it.
• 44:54
  And I want to be part of that shift.
• 44:56
  Yeah.
• 44:57
  But again, as advice to people, I think understanding what is you're trying to achieve is super important.
• 45:04
  Because I think taking a step back and being like, where do I want to go?
• 45:06
  And then that also shapes like the jobs that you take and the people that you talk to in the podcasts or panels or whatever else you go on.
• 45:14
  Understanding if that's aligned to who you want to be and how you want to be seen, I think is really important to enabling and facilitating you to go and be that person.
• 45:21
  Hmm.
• 45:22
  Hmm.
• 45:22
  Hmm.
• 45:23
  Hmm.
• 45:23
  Wow.
• 45:24
  Yes, I'm seeing like this whole ecosystem forming around you because it's like what you said about the space, the fashion, the record label, like this sort of since the breath is connected to all of life, like why can't the way that you share it can share breath work be connected to like so many like cool.
• 45:44
  It has that like rebellious, fun energy that I think is so cool.
• 45:55
  it's completely night and day what you can unlock.
• 45:57
  And so I can only imagine with like performing comedians, like so many people who are out there.
• 46:02
  There's so many cool things.
• 46:04
  Anyway, that's so many, so many things are coming.
• 46:06
  Were you about to say something?
• 46:07
  Yeah.
• 46:08
  One tiny thing on that.
• 46:10
  Like when you're the nervous system stuff we're talking about, when you're in fight or flight, you divert blood flow.
• 46:17
  All of your energy goes to external license, we were saying, and you divert blood flow away from your prefrontal cortex, which is like your thinking brain.
• 46:24
  So if you're in that side of your nervous system, whether it's getting on stage to sing, whether it's getting on stage to talk, presentation, having a big conversation, you ever have those convos where you're really nervous and you go away and you're like, I didn't get across anything I wanted to say.
• 46:37
  Sometimes people go on stage and forget their name.
• 46:39
  Like you know your name.
• 46:41
  It's just because in those moments, if you're in that fight or flight state, all your brain is thinking is get me the F out of here.
• 46:49
  Get me off this stage.
• 46:50
  Get me somewhere safe.
• 46:51
  I don't feel calm.
• 46:52
  And having the ability to put yourself in a calm state of mind beforehand clears your head, clears your headspace.
• 46:57
  And it allows you to sing, perform, talk, be.
• 47:02
  It's not even at the best you can be, but it allows you to be you.
• 47:08
  Whereas when you're in the other side of your nervous system, it's not like you're not you, it's just your brain and your body are saying, I don't want to be here.
• 47:16
  And all of your energy and resources are being diverted to trying to get you out of there.
• 47:20
  Your palms are sweating wherever else it might be.
• 47:22
  And I think, as we were saying, music label, these are all random, but music label, sports teams, anyone, there's not a single person living that cannot benefit from using or having the ability to shift your internal state quickly, simply, easily.
• 47:38
  Hmm.
• 47:39
  Yes.
• 47:39
  Oh, my goodness.
• 47:40
  Absolutely.
• 47:41
  Oh, wow.
• 47:42
  I love what you said about...
• 47:44
  It's like you're doing this tool to allow, it's not even becoming your best self, like you said, becoming you to remove some of that, like that energy and that externalizing and internalize.
• 47:55
  I mean, yeah, we would all be operating at such a different capacity if we were doing these tools regularly, such as the one that's going to be linked below from Dani.
• 48:04
  It's so powerful.
• 48:05
  Yeah, there's no area in life.
• 48:07
  Imagine parents and children, like what could be unlocked, you know, because that moment that your parent was dysregulated stays with you for 50 years.
• 48:14
  It's like never leaves you.
• 48:17
  So yeah, I'd be so huge.
• 48:19
  And then what you said about your classes and like the representation.
• 48:22
  One of the things that I think is interesting about breathwork events or like moments when I've gone to a couple of breathwork events in London.
• 48:28
  But I think some people struggle with the idea of paying to go and breathe.
• 48:33
  So let's talk about that.
• 48:34
  Yeah.
• 48:36
  100%.
• 48:37
  I, this is, the first story, so two years before I did my teacher training, again, my ex-girlfriend, I've got this class, East London, and,
• 48:48
  9am on a Sunday, so you can't go out on a Saturday.
• 48:51
  You need to wake up early, get across town, pay 30 quid, and they're going to teach you how to breathe.
• 48:58
  And I was like, you're smoking something.
• 49:00
  There was no, I was like, no way.
• 49:03
  And I just didn't.
• 49:04
  I was like, no, I'm not going.
• 49:05
  And two years later, obviously still, I didn't want to go to teach training.
• 49:08
  But as we were talking about before, we do it every day.
• 49:12
  20,000 times a day.
• 49:16
  We've never really been drilled into us that we're doing it badly.
• 49:20
  You just assume you're, and as you say, you reach for these other crutches before you ever look at your breathing.
• 49:27
  So you're, you're, you might look at your nutrition.
• 49:33
  Have I, we were talking about food earlier.
• 49:35
  Have I eaten well?
• 49:35
  Have I drank enough water?
• 49:37
  Have I had too much coffee?
• 49:38
  Am I like this?
• 49:39
  You're snapping at people.
• 49:40
  Like, did I sleep well?
• 49:42
  Have I had enough exercise this week?
• 49:44
  And all of these things are super important to how you're feeling, how you're reacting.
• 49:50
  But the one thing that underpins all of them is how you breathe.
• 49:53
  Every single minute, every single moment, how you're breathing will impact how you feel.
• 49:57
  Whether you're regulated, not regulated, reactive, not reactive.
• 50:00
  Whether you can think clearly and be at your best or whether you just had a really bad day at the office.
• 50:04
  Your breathing goes through all of them.
• 50:06
  And whenever we have those days, we look at, did I get my eight hours sleep?
• 50:14
  Health bar high.
• 50:15
  I don't have a weeper.
• 50:16
  But do you know what I mean?
• 50:17
  We just reach for these other... And because it's free and because it's always there and because we don't think about it, we never look at our breathing.
• 50:26
  But it is categorically...
• 50:29
  It underpins everything.
• 50:30
  Whether you have a good night's sleep or not will depend on your breathing.
• 50:33
  If you can get yourself...
• 50:34
  If you can get your heart rate down 30 minutes before bed, you'll sleep better.
• 50:37
  If you breathe through your nose while you're sleeping, you'll just...
• 50:43
  To go on to quickly, one thing to take away from this, breathe through your nose, always.
• 50:47
  Like if you can, throughout your day to day life, if you want to set yourself a little challenge just to do your commute to work.
• 50:53
  Some people will always breathe through their nose, some people will breathe through their mouth.
• 50:56
  If you breathe through your mouth, you'll breathe higher up into your chest, you'll be a little bit more agitated.
• 51:00
  That baseline level of stress will just get a little bit higher, you'll be a little bit more reactive, you'll be wondering why.
• 51:05
  You won't have a clue, you'll be like, oh, what's happened today?
• 51:07
  Did I, have I not eaten well or whatever it might be?
• 51:11
  So yeah, there is this hurdle to get over that's like, I need to pay to go and do this.
• 51:15
  Definitely.
• 51:16
  Because it's something that we have for free.
• 51:20
  And because we've been doing it for so long, it's like someone telling you, you need to go and pay for walking lessons.
• 51:25
  You're a bit like, but I actually walk super good.
• 51:28
  Like, how can, and then some people, this is, I've made this up on the spot, but as a niche, some people may be ever so slightly walking, slightly off.
• 51:37
  I probably actually do.
• 51:39
  And one little thing like physios until it like ripples through your whole body.
• 51:43
  Oh, you're got fallen arches and then you collapse this one hip.
• 51:47
  And then now all of a sudden you've done your knee three times and this lower back's going out.
• 51:51
  And they're like, oh, it's actually just because you need to fix how you walk or you get insoles put in or whatever.
• 51:55
  Yeah.
• 51:56
  But we're always adding on little things to try and correct issues, but we never really look at how we breathe.
• 52:01
  So true.
• 52:02
  Wow.
• 52:03
  Yes.
• 52:03
  And it's also what you said about how we look at everything else.
• 52:07
  It's also the cost of inaction.
• 52:08
  So all the time you spend scrolling, all the time you spend reaching for food that you don't need, but you're anxious.
• 52:14
  All the time you spend numbing yourself with TV, porn, whatever people are addicted to at this time, that's so addicting.
• 52:21
  It is expensive to invest in a class, but if you think of, okay, but what about that next moment where instead of going on my phone, which makes me feel terrible, I'll like do the coherence breathing or I'll get the cost of what a completely different nervous system.
• 52:35
  It's actually the most invaluable thing ever, you know?
• 52:37
  Literally, it's like the most, I mean, of course, not in an insensitive way of like, of course, if you are not able to afford going, that's different and you should, you know, but it's more so like just at least seeing the value of it, even if you don't invest in it, I think is very important because it's invaluable.
• 52:54
  And also like we never, how do I say this?
• 53:00
  You preventative things.
• 53:03
  Let me get my thoughts clear.
• 53:06
  You never win a Medal of Honour for stopping a war.
• 53:11
  Ooh, okay.
• 53:14
  Ooh.
• 53:14
  Like the war has to be going on and someone does something brave.
• 53:18
  But the person who de-escalated the tension that stopped World War III has not got a Medal of Honor sat on their shelf.
• 53:26
  And I think Breathwork, we struggle to see the value when things haven't gone wrong.
• 53:31
  So Breathwork is amazing when you do hit these, as I was saying earlier, people have these traumatic events and they lose a loved one or they're super depressive and they're having really...
• 53:39
  Breathwork's amazing in those instances.
• 53:43
  But it's equally as amazing as a preventative measure to stop you spiraling if you just start integrating it day to day.
• 53:50
  But because you will never see the spiral that you've prevented, people struggle to value it.
• 53:57
  And I guess that's what I was talking about earlier.
• 53:59
  Like, that's helped me clear my thinking.
• 54:01
  I don't know if it has a PR problem.
• 54:02
  It just...
• 54:04
  It's easier to show people how when you've fallen off or lost someone or you're going through grief or you really need to resolve something, it's easy to show people how this factory reset kind of breathing can actually help you go and process some things or can help you feel better afterwards.
• 54:22
  It's really hard to show the value of, okay, just breathe five minutes a day and you will stop yourself getting to this point where you actually have a burnout and whatever else.
• 54:31
  It's hard to show.
• 54:32
  And I guess that's probably what I mean by it's maybe not a PR problem.
• 54:35
  It's just the way we're wired as humans.
• 54:38
  It's hard to value the thing that we prevented happening.
• 54:41
  Does that, I don't know, does that make sense?
• 54:42
  Definitely, yes.
• 54:43
  I think there's definitely like a logical fallacy about this.
• 54:47
  Yes, like there is, anyways, yes, but that's exactly it.
• 54:51
  Yes, we definitely completely don't acknowledge preventative measures and the invisible, I mean, it's completely invisible what they would have unlocked.
• 55:02
  But yes, absolutely invisible value.
• 55:05
  Hmm.
• 55:07
  And also it's really amazing because there's so many free practices with breathwork.
• 55:10
  So that is so important.
• 55:12
  And then what I also think, if you are able to invest in going to these events, it's also you're paying for the facilitator's knowledge.
• 55:18
  Like the way someone holds the space is going to change you.
• 55:21
  Like you'll think about what they said, like for months, for years.
• 55:23
  Yeah.
• 55:23
  So it's like they went on this whole journey.
• 55:25
  They, you know, you went to South Africa, you went this, you're like now holding the space for people.
• 55:30
  And it's just in reverence of that of like, I support what you know, you know, and that I couldn't take myself there without you holding this space in this way.
• 55:37
  So I think that's very powerful.
• 55:40
  So I feel like it's so worth it if people can go to go and then also to just integrate this into their daily lives.
• 55:46
  I am curious at a personal level, like of your own personality reactions, like how breathwork has changed you as a man.
• 56:00
  I feel I think I was already fairly calm as a person.
• 56:03
  I feel more calm for sure.
• 56:06
  and less reactive, as we were talking about earlier.
• 56:09
  Things don't seem to, life just is what it is, and I definitely feel more calm on that side.
• 56:15
  I have,
• 56:18
  So when we did conscious connected breathwork for the teacher training, I did it.
• 56:22
  It's a big practice, big experience, but we did it twice a day for like a month, which is hectic.
• 56:29
  Um, just because to be able to facilitate and teach, you need to have been everywhere.
• 56:33
  People are going to go.
• 56:33
  So I've done it hundreds of times now, but maybe on the fifth time.
• 56:38
  So maybe it's like day three.
• 56:40
  I just burst into tears.
• 56:42
  I don't even know why I was crying.
• 56:44
  I was just like, it's like an emotional, and I think often men don't, and the reason to do conscious connected breath work isn't to go and cry like, and it doesn't happen every time.
• 56:53
  But that was almost interesting and powerful for me.
• 56:59
  And I've now held it enough times I see it pop off in different spaces and especially when guys come to the space.
• 57:05
  And often I talk to them after I was like, I don't even, I don't actually know what just happened or why or what I was holding on to.
• 57:11
  I don't even know what I'd, but you just end up, again, not every time I meet like one or two people in a class, but I think that's really powerful for a man who...
• 57:21
  struggles to i definitely feel more in touch with my emotions and i don't know if that's 100% just through breath work or just through a journey that i've been on as a person um but a lot of it was that teacher training was insane like you process a lot you learn who you are you go into these depths of your almost subconscious the way i describe conscious connected breath work is like your conscious mind just takes a little wonder for
• 57:46
  an hour and you provide the space for your subconscious mind to just go and just faff about like going oh what's happening over here do you remember this oh this might be linked to this and then like you pop out and you're like what's just it's so hard to explain this is why what's just happened but it's like dream state a dream is a state of old state of consciousness same with psychedelic states or um
• 58:09
  But yeah, I definitely feel more, I think I'm more emotional, but, and I think breathwork's been a big part of that.
• 58:14
  And I think in general, just as you grow up sometimes, but I came from, my dad was Caribbean, Jamaican.
• 58:22
  Even just men of that era weren't super forthcoming or open with how they feel.
• 58:27
  A lot of my, not just Caribbean, but my friends, parents, dads especially, don't talk loads.
• 58:33
  I'm super fortunate.
• 58:34
  My friendship circle, we chop it up.
• 58:37
  We'll go and chat.
• 58:38
  We just have it.
• 58:39
  We still rarely see the boys cry.
• 58:42
  Do you know what I mean?
• 58:43
  Yeah.
• 58:44
  But I feel more in touch with how I feel emotionally.
• 58:49
  So that's the conscious, connected, breathwork side.
• 58:51
  And then just the breathing.
• 58:52
  I just feel, yeah, I don't know.
• 58:54
  It's, again, hard to put your finger on, which is why it's hard to...
• 58:59
  Word of mouth is the best way for people to come along to these classes.
• 59:01
  Because once you come, someone's like, you've got to go to this.
• 59:05
  But in terms of like, if you're ever to market it on when we come on these things, and like people ask me, like, what would you say to people to come down?
• 59:11
  You can talk people through, but it's so experiential that you're just like, you kind of have to...
• 59:17
  you would just feel more calm as a person.
• 59:19
  Or I do.
• 59:21
  And I assume other people do.
• 59:26
  The emotional like opening.
• 59:27
  And also I love that you have a friend group that does that.
• 59:30
  I wish for all people, but especially men to have more of those spaces of vulnerability and like just sharing.
• 59:35
  And, and then also that, that,
• 59:39
  month that must have been as you were saying that I was like oh my god I want to do that that sounds so like intense hectic in a good way um I can only imagine and the tears and the things we're holding I went to a breathwork event and like the it's like also very primal which is amazing you're hearing these noises that you don't hear humans make because we're so repressed and like conditioned to you know not even hear ourselves like express and you're hearing people like wailing screaming um just making these very like we are animals and so it's
• 1:00:07
  It's amazing.
• 1:00:08
  I mean, even just for that, I mean, I'm like, that's part of the experience.
• 1:00:12
  I mean, obviously, as you've said, just to set expectations, not every event is going to be like that, nor should it.
• 1:00:17
  But it's very, very powerful, like what the body is holding on to.
• 1:00:20
  And I'm sure what you've seen and the releases that people have.
• 1:00:25
  Do you find that it's like...
• 1:00:27
  The release happens and then I guess the desire is to think, oh, like it's gone or are we just like always releasing that same thing coming up?
• 1:00:36
  I don't know where I'm fully asking, but I think it's like that feeling of is this something that you need to keep doing to receive the benefits of, I guess, the daily practice and then the longer flows?
• 1:00:46
  How do we maintain that connection?
• 1:00:49
  With the bigger conscious connected breath, you kind of, once you've done it, you kind of, you can sometimes you can feel that you need it again.
• 1:00:55
  So almost like your head's a bit cloudy.
• 1:00:57
  I had someone, I was at a...
• 1:01:01
  Like a men's community.
• 1:01:03
  Men's community is the wrong word.
• 1:01:04
  It's like a gym class.
• 1:01:06
  Just for men.
• 1:01:07
  This guy's built a community.
• 1:01:09
  Amazing person.
• 1:01:10
  Amazing people.
• 1:01:10
  Ran a breath work for their community.
• 1:01:15
  A few months ago now, maybe six months ago.
• 1:01:18
  And I was at the gym session with them on Saturday.
• 1:01:20
  And I've got a few people coming up to me like, I feel like I need this class again when you're next to doing it.
• 1:01:25
  And sometimes you can just...
• 1:01:26
  Because after it's almost like, not in my words, but people look up to me and they're like, I feel like I was carrying boulders around with me and you've just lifted them.
• 1:01:35
  I'm like, it's not actually me that's really, you provide a space and teach people how they need to do, but it's the breathing, it's you breathing that's going to take you to wherever you need to go.
• 1:01:43
  Every experience is different, but often when life's feeling like asphyxiating, this is like hitting factory reset or like releasing a pressure valve.
• 1:01:52
  Um...
• 1:01:54
  So yeah, that's with the bigger conscious connected breathwork practice.
• 1:01:57
  And again, like you said, some classes it's just everyone's just super chill and you feel completely bliss at the end of it.
• 1:02:02
  Some classes you might have something just crack for you and you're like, oh, I needed this.
• 1:02:06
  This took me here.
• 1:02:07
  Sometimes you just come out with like a more clarity on what it is that you need, that you feel you should be or need to do next.
• 1:02:16
  And often, because we spend our time in this, there's like different brainwave states, right, to go a bit neuroscience-y.
• 1:02:23
  But the way in which you're, when you're thinking, you have all these things firing in your brain and they communicate and they communicate on different frequency.
• 1:02:30
  And some are quick and some are slow.
• 1:02:32
  So in deep sleep, you have really slow brainwave state.
• 1:02:36
  It's called delta.
• 1:02:38
  And it's like connecting different parts of your brain that don't ordinarily communicate.
• 1:02:42
  So sleep's just an amazing sleep.
• 1:02:44
  So good for you.
• 1:02:45
  We spend our life in this brainwave state called beta.
• 1:02:47
  Most adults do.
• 1:02:49
  Which is like, I'm Danny, I need to be here, I'm on the Soul Salon podcast at this moment in time, I'm having a breakfast flip, I need to go here and do this.
• 1:02:55
  And you're constantly narrating and thinking about what you need to do.
• 1:02:59
  Kids don't have that capacity, you know, kids when they're like, so up until the age of two, kids are just in delta brainwave, which is what we get in deep sleep.
• 1:03:07
  Really?
• 1:03:08
  Yeah.
• 1:03:09
  What?
• 1:03:09
  Yeah.
• 1:03:09
  So they're just assimilating information and like everything.
• 1:03:12
  You know, they're always like this and like you give them a leaf and they're like, they're just taking in information and then they sleep all the time.
• 1:03:18
  Right.
• 1:03:18
  Yeah.
• 1:03:19
  Oh, my gosh.
• 1:03:20
  From two to seven, they're in this brainwave state called Alpha, which, again, is almost like think.
• 1:03:26
  You know, when you're reading a book, you're like engaged but enthralled in one thing and you have like a bit of a more creative side.
• 1:03:33
  And again, I'm pretty sure zero to two is just delta and two to seven is just alpha for kids.
• 1:03:38
  They only have alpha and delta, I'm pretty sure.
• 1:03:41
  And then after that, you start to begin to think like, you're like, oh, if I need to eat today, I need to buy food and then I need to cook at some point.
• 1:03:47
  And you start to be able to think forward and adults, we spend most of our life in beta.
• 1:03:51
  There's three phases of beta, but anyway, it's just more task orientated and blah, blah, blah.
• 1:03:55
  Um, and when you meditate, you're trying to get into, um, Delta.
• 1:04:03
  or theta, I can't remember, there's two slow ones.
• 1:04:05
  And when you meditate, you get into, it's theta actually, which is the fourth one.
• 1:04:09
  So there's alpha, beta, theta, and delta.
• 1:04:12
  When you meditate, you're trying to get into theta.
• 1:04:13
  And that is one above deep sleep, slow wave.
• 1:04:16
  But again, it's like a really different parts of your brain that interact in that don't ordinarily, you have like a clarity, a sense of creativity.
• 1:04:24
  You can get there through meditation, but it is often really experienced practitioners and it takes you a while to get into it.
• 1:04:29
  through conscious connected breath work you can like crowbar your way into this like a quicker um so again this part of it's just fascinating because on the literal neuroscientific lens you're putting yourself in a state where you have the capacity to
• 1:04:44
  think in a way that you don't through day-to-day life and often that can be where the breakthroughs come from or the oh i need to do this or oh i actually don't need to worry about that or whatever else it might be because when you're bopping through life and you're constantly narrating you don't give yourself the space to get into these states and really think through what you
• 1:05:07
  as me needing to take that sabbatical from work to work out what it is.
• 1:05:13
  And I didn't know what Breath of the Heart was when I left.
• 1:05:15
  When I was on the plane for my year away, I was reading a book by James Nestor called Breath.
• 1:05:20
  Fascinating book.
• 1:05:21
  Got into it, read Wim Hof, started doing it a little bit.
• 1:05:23
  Then my girlfriend was like, do you want to come to this?
• 1:05:25
  Blah, blah, blah.
• 1:05:26
  But I couldn't work out what it was I needed to do while I was in the nine to five, bam, bam, bam.
• 1:05:31
  And I think often I would consider that as like the beta brainwave state that we're almost always in.
• 1:05:36
  And you can't always work out what your next step should be or how this links to this or how you'll truly be happy when you're always in that state.
• 1:05:44
  And the world we live in is conditioned to keep us in this state because we never slow down.
• 1:05:48
  We never take the time.
• 1:05:50
  And this is like I said, like taking a crowbar and forcing you to slow down.
• 1:05:55
  And you get into this brainwave state and in that state, the possibility of render sounds a bit, but the possibility to, you give yourself the opportunity to work some stuff out.
• 1:06:07
  And it doesn't happen every time.
• 1:06:09
  And sometimes you just come out, even if nothing happens in that state, just diaphragmatic breathing, so deep into your belly.
• 1:06:16
  For 40 minutes or whatever, through conscious connected breathwork, it's just amazing for your system.
• 1:06:20
  You will flush your lymphatic system.
• 1:06:22
  You will train your body to breathe deeper.
• 1:06:24
  For singers, it's amazing.
• 1:06:25
  Opera singers are phenomenal breathers already because they know breath control.
• 1:06:29
  All of this is you come and these rappers that are doing really quickly or people like Olivia Dean that we're talking about, they have just when they're on the mic and they never really sound like they're out of breath or taking breath.
• 1:06:39
  It's deep.
• 1:06:40
  And even if you don't access these altered states of consciousness, just breathing deeply for 40 minutes or whatever you do in the class is amazing for your body as a full service.
• 1:06:51
  But yeah, I think, I don't even know where we started this question, but I just, I just, everyone needs to do this.
• 1:06:57
  Yeah.
• 1:06:58
  Wow.
• 1:06:59
  Oh, my word.
• 1:06:59
  Yes.
• 1:07:00
  I also got like fully lost.
• 1:07:02
  I was like, no, no, no.
• 1:07:05
  It was amazing.
• 1:07:06
  But it was like taking away that you went through the different frequencies and then taking off the we're too much in Bida.
• 1:07:14
  So we're being invited to like go and the idea of like this is like a trap door into that state that meditate because I was going to ask you, OK, so meditation versus breathwork.
• 1:07:24
  Okay, oh my word.
• 1:07:25
  Wow.
• 1:07:25
  I feel like as you were saying that it was kind of emulating the experience of you described reading a book and you're like so like present with the book and nothing else exists.
• 1:07:33
  But then so you were speaking on my, ooh, ooh.
• 1:07:35
  And then I was like, wait, where are we?
• 1:07:37
  Oh my gosh, incredible.
• 1:07:38
  Okay, so we're going to be accessing books.
• 1:07:41
  these deeper brain waves or frequencies that are again like you said nourishing to our entire like system it's also difficult to wrap our heads around that like we can heal through the breath like that we're actually doing something really good for our body so that's really powerful.
• 1:07:57
  So the one thing with conscious connected breath that just so that people, if they're not going to do it as they do it, are aware of is it can be quite uncomfortable.
• 1:08:05
  So can you talk to us about that, like that ego mind being like, this is like this shouldn't feel like this.
• 1:08:10
  Or that feeling of like it's not working, like the voice that isn't yet coming off.
• 1:08:15
  It does happen after a while.
• 1:08:17
  But like, how would you coach someone through that resistance?
• 1:08:21
  Yeah, so definitely the first, I would say this in every one of my classes, I'm like the first two minutes you're going to be like, get me the fuck out of here.
• 1:08:26
  There is no, I don't want to be here.
• 1:08:29
  You can, your body can start to like tingle, your body temperature can change.
• 1:08:33
  All of this is just because you're ever so slightly activating the fight or flight side of your nervous system.
• 1:08:37
  And that comes with physiological changes.
• 1:08:39
  You're blowing off more carbon dioxide than usual.
• 1:08:42
  So your blood pH changes.
• 1:08:43
  And ordinarily, when these things are happening, you send alarm bells to your brain that's like something's going wrong.
• 1:08:49
  I need to get out of this situation.
• 1:08:52
  And with conscious connected breath, you stay in it and you continue breathing through and you just focus on the next breath.
• 1:08:59
  And when that happens, this is not proven how or why this works yet.
• 1:09:06
  But this is the focus of my testation.
• 1:09:09
  The main brain theory at the moment is called predictive processing, which is essentially that our brain creates this predictive model of the world and how it should look.
• 1:09:20
  And it uses that model and takes incoming sensory information from your body and from your eyes and your ears and whatever else.
• 1:09:26
  And it maps the two.
• 1:09:28
  So you've got its model that it thinks how the world should look and all the information coming in.
• 1:09:32
  And then it either confirms that its model is correct or you've got a prediction error and it updates the model.
• 1:09:38
  And that's how it continually learns.
• 1:09:39
  And that's how it keeps like, if you think you've got to keep our body temperature at like 37 degrees and a narrow band and our blood pressure and a super narrow band and like...
• 1:09:47
  the way they think the brain or the body does that is to create these models take the information weigh the model versus like previous experiences that we've had and then off you go super fascinating and psychedelics come out from so you've got top down brain down and body up sensory information psychedelics bind especially mushrooms to a specific type of receptor in your prefrontal cortex they're called like v modal receptors or something um
• 1:10:15
  And you can essentially redefine.
• 1:10:18
  So they think the sense of self, like who we are, who you are, who I am, is basically a predictive model that you've learned from who you have been and who you are in the world.
• 1:10:26
  And then as you keep updating it, and essentially they think psychedelics can completely reshift the prior experience of who you think you are as a self, which enable different parts of your brain to communicate that don't normally, which is why people are like, oh, I could smell colors.
• 1:10:42
  And do you know what I mean?
• 1:10:45
  And conscious connected breathwork kind of comes out from the opposite side.
• 1:10:48
  So it's like massive sensory overload from the bottom up.
• 1:10:51
  So rather than top down, bottom up.
• 1:10:53
  But anytime there is a prediction error, like so the sensory information coming up, your pH is changing, your body feels a bit uncomfortable.
• 1:10:59
  Ordinarily, you should just be like, oh, no, I don't want to be here.
• 1:11:01
  I want to get out of this situation.
• 1:11:02
  Yeah.
• 1:11:02
  You sit in it, you breathe through it.
• 1:11:04
  And then when that happens, you start to reshift or reorganize or re-evaluate, re-question other really strong held beliefs that you had before.
• 1:11:14
  And one might be the sense of self or other things.
• 1:11:16
  When you can shift that, you can rewire neural networking.
• 1:11:20
  And I think that's how you can kind of end up in these situations where you've.
• 1:11:25
  not healed but just shifted stuff people get stuck in patterns of thinking and you can really start because the brain is super plastic but often we just take the path of least resistance which can be the way we thought about something before i've always thought this so i still think this and i've always done this like this so i still do like this or i've been addicted to this so i'm still addicted or
• 1:11:46
  They're using psychedelics for treatment-resistant depression and PTSD.
• 1:11:49
  And again, a lot of these, under this modelling, a lot of these ways of thinking are quite ingrained and stuck.
• 1:11:54
  And if you can just, yeah, shift it by...
• 1:11:59
  I mean, and breathwork's so interesting because you're not ingesting a pharmacological substance.
• 1:12:03
  You're not taking a drug.
• 1:12:07
  But yeah, that's kind of how... Wow.
• 1:12:10
  That's kind of... Again, it's an interesting topic because...
• 1:12:14
  not it's not been with the mind it's quite hard to prove stuff because you can't put your finger on the mind so we're always looking at what's going on in the brain and inferring well this blood flow going here here here there's connectivity going here here here so this must be happening and again this model it's called yeah predictive processing and interoception super super super interesting but it's hard to prove right because how do you prove a mind model um but it's fascinating
• 1:12:40
  That is extremely fascinating.
• 1:12:42
  So then the mushrooms, the psychedelics are coming from, you said top down and then breath is coming from bottom up.
• 1:12:49
  Wow.
• 1:12:50
  Oh, my word.
• 1:12:50
  Okay.
• 1:12:50
  Well, yeah, I can imagine what you're studying is like continually evolving and they're questioning and not fully able to prove, as you said, not being able to see the mind.
• 1:13:01
  That is so interesting, like these ingrained patterns.
• 1:13:03
  I hope over time we have like more and more access to that because if we could disrupt those patterns, like you said, with addiction, with trauma, with PTSD, with all these things, oh my word, what a world we'd live in.
• 1:13:14
  Yeah, which is so powerful.
• 1:13:16
  And sorry, I just remembered to go back quickly because you asked me about the experience of conscious connected breathwork.
• 1:13:23
  So yeah, I think it can sometimes feel a bit uncomfortable for like the first two or three minutes, but then it tends to subside and time just dissolves.
• 1:13:31
  Like if you just focus on your breathing for the next two or three breaths, you're there for 40 minutes.
• 1:13:36
  The first two or three minutes is always a little bit like, and I get it.
• 1:13:39
  Every time I lie down and do it, I'm like...
• 1:13:41
  and why did I do this?
• 1:13:43
  Like, this was my own time.
• 1:13:45
  I paid to be here.
• 1:13:47
  I didn't need to be.
• 1:13:48
  Your whole, every part of your body is like, you know what I'm saying about when you get up on stage and your brain is like, get me off here if you're in fight or flight.
• 1:13:54
  When you go into fight or flight slightly, you don't want to be where you are because our survival is predicated on running or fighting.
• 1:14:01
  That's the whole system you're activating.
• 1:14:04
  So you activate that system and your mind's like, I don't want to be here.
• 1:14:08
  I can't breathe like this for 40 minutes.
• 1:14:10
  I'm bored of Danny's voice already.
• 1:14:12
  Like you just, everything is like, get me out.
• 1:14:14
  And then when you sit in it and keep breathing through it, this prediction error occurs, which can lead to the mental benefits, I guess, when you have a reset.
• 1:14:24
  But also time just disintegrates into, you just pop out the other side and you're like, wait, this was 40 minutes and...
• 1:14:31
  Yeah, and again, it's hard to explain.
• 1:14:32
  You can't just... And I can't think of another experience where you completely...
• 1:14:37
  Unless you're in that flow state doing stuff, which you might have gotten before with songwriting or whatever it might be.
• 1:14:42
  Like, I've had it at times when you're playing football or sports or maybe it's in work, but you just get into this zone where...
• 1:14:49
  It's almost like you're on autopilot, but you're dead focused.
• 1:14:51
  And time, you're like, oh, this has just been two hours of my life and I don't even know what I've just done.
• 1:14:56
  It's kind of like that, but it's just hard to explain.
• 1:14:59
  So people need experience.
• 1:15:01
  Yes.
• 1:15:03
  Ooh, yes, that two minutes of time dissolving, disintegrating.
• 1:15:07
  Yes, like bending.
• 1:15:08
  And then you're like in these other dimensions.
• 1:15:10
  You feel like you've been on a whole journey, but you've just been sat there.
• 1:15:12
  Like it's crazy.
• 1:15:14
  It's amazing.
• 1:15:15
  I hope everyone gets to experience it.
• 1:15:17
  And that it becomes like more and more just done and accessible and like things that people go to do with their friends and then talk about afterwards.
• 1:15:25
  So powerful.
• 1:15:26
  Wow.
• 1:15:28
  Wow.
• 1:15:29
  And then what you said about those two minutes, if you can breathe through that, that then changes how you show up in difficult moments of your life because you've like confronted discomfort so many times that you're like this conversation, this anything I'm nervous about.
• 1:15:41
  It's just a sensation that I'm afraid of experiencing now.
• 1:15:43
  And I can like breathe through it.
• 1:15:45
  That tool of resilience really like carries with you.
• 1:15:49
  So when I listen to a podcast, a little topic shift, the one thing I'm always like, why don't they talk about sex?
• 1:15:54
  I'm like, let's talk about sexuality, sensuality and the breathing, the breath work.
• 1:15:59
  Sorry, I was going to say the breath.
• 1:16:02
  And I was like, he doesn't.
• 1:16:03
  Of course.
• 1:16:04
  Yes.
• 1:16:04
  You know, in a dialogue.
• 1:16:06
  Breathing.
• 1:16:06
  Yeah.
• 1:16:07
  Is so connected to sensuality, sexuality and pleasure.
• 1:16:11
  So I'd love for you to talk to us about how the breath to you connects to pleasure, sensuality, sexuality.
• 1:16:20
  A few ways.
• 1:16:22
  I think one, as we were talking about earlier, aligning your mind to where your body is is super important.
• 1:16:27
  And especially during sexual experiences, being in the moment and being where you are.
• 1:16:31
  But as with everyone, sometimes your mind can be off racing, whether you've got performance anxiety or all sorts of different things.
• 1:16:39
  Like, is this the right person?
• 1:16:40
  Am I in the right place?
• 1:16:41
  Blah, blah, blah.
• 1:16:43
  And of all the tools, especially if you're in those sort of encounters, focus on your breathing.
• 1:16:48
  It's probably the only tool you have in that moment in time that you can access that can really...
• 1:16:54
  quiet a mind that is racing and also excitement especially sexual excitement is still some form of like fight or flight agitation so interesting again just being able to calm yourself down in those moments enables you to one be more in the moment and two perhaps not run get run away excited there's also loads of stuff to do with partner stuff so as we were talking about earlier
• 1:17:23
  Doing breathwork on your own, super useful, help you.
• 1:17:26
  But when you do it with someone else, it's also just a completely different experience.
• 1:17:29
  And whether that's friends or family or whatever in a group, but especially in sexual relationships and in those moments, sometimes amazing to just because you align the frequency you're on together.
• 1:17:40
  And when you step into a space on the same frequency, it's a completely different experience to when you come at it with different worries and fears or whatever.
• 1:17:48
  When you do a little bit of breath work, basically most of the things you're worrying about aren't that deep.
• 1:17:52
  You're just like, as you were saying, when sometimes when people are having a bit of an argument, you'd be like, I love people just go in and do five minutes and then come back because it's not that deep.
• 1:18:00
  Your runaway mind is not that, it's never that big or important or whatever you're talking about.
• 1:18:06
  And yeah, when you're in definitely like whether it's a four play scenario or just sexual encounters, there's a massive, massive, massive place for being able to self-regulate and co-regulate.
• 1:18:19
  And I'd argue one of the best ways you can do that is through your breathing.
• 1:18:22
  That's so beautiful.
• 1:18:24
  Yeah.
• 1:18:24
  And I think that, like you said, a lot of these practices originated in the East and like with Tantra and with Kama Sutra and that idea, I think of breathing as almost like a sensual practice to connect to someone and to, like you said, align frequencies and like become one in a certain way.
• 1:18:45
  It's so beautiful and powerful, but also...
• 1:18:48
  Some people might feel nervous to like suggest to their partner.
• 1:18:50
  It's kind of like out there, I guess.
• 1:18:52
  So it's not it's not a I mean, some people might feel just like a bit of fear or shame or so.
• 1:18:59
  What would you suggest is like a practice that that is quite easy for them to integrate into like their intimate life, their sex life with their partners at the moment?
• 1:19:08
  I mean, just to start with, it's great just taking a few breaths in and out together.
• 1:19:12
  So as you're about to start or as you're getting down to it, if you just sit and you're sat opposite facing each other and you just do the same as you start most breathing practices or yoga or whatever, you know, you just breathe deep in through your nose and then just side out and you can just feel your shoulders relax and you can do it with your eyes open looking at each other or with your eyes closed.
• 1:19:29
  And if you just do that three times together, even if you do that three times on your own, you just feel in.
• 1:19:34
  And again, once you, it's so, it's so interesting because as you were saying, sometimes you might feel nervous to ask.
• 1:19:40
  Mm-hmm.
• 1:19:41
  or awkward or like it's a bit weird but after i mean taking three deep breaths in together it's going to take you all of 10 seconds and your nerves and how you feel after those 10 seconds will be completely alleviated um it's like counterintuitive the thing you're scared to us doing is the thing that's going to calm you down the most yes and that the other person will be so grateful you ask because then they enter another state as well
• 1:20:04
  And their minds also, they've got their own stuff that they're worrying about.
• 1:20:09
  Like, do I look good in this?
• 1:20:10
  Have I done this?
• 1:20:11
  Have I, like, is the lighting good?
• 1:20:13
  Like, there's so much going, like, there's so much going through your head in those scenarios.
• 1:20:19
  And yeah, again, just to keep it super simple.
• 1:20:21
  If you just take a deep breath in through your nose.
• 1:20:24
  And then side out.
• 1:20:24
  And on the exhale, yeah, if you just really focus on relaxing, because I do it so often throughout the day.
• 1:20:30
  And like whether I might be sat in the tube or I might be in the shower or whatever it might be.
• 1:20:34
  And as you exhale, if you really focus on relaxing, you notice that you are like you're clutching onto the side of the tube and you just feel your hand let go.
• 1:20:42
  And you're like, I didn't even know I was bracing.
• 1:20:44
  What am I even bracing for?
• 1:20:46
  And as you do that three times, you feel for sure in a better place.
• 1:20:50
  I mean, there's loads of more complicated things to do, but.
• 1:20:53
  Yeah, that's perfect.
• 1:20:54
  I feel like that's so accessible and like easy, beautiful.
• 1:21:00
  It's like the simplicity and the potency.
• 1:21:04
  It's like one.
• 1:21:05
  And so everyone who does this practice, please do let us know, like comment below, because I think that will be so helpful.
• 1:21:11
  And then also just like in terms of what we think an orgasmic state looks like.
• 1:21:17
  from media is this very shallow and fast breathing.
• 1:21:22
  And so do you have any sort of guidance on like maybe how through media and porn people think feeling good is supposed to sound through the breath versus maybe how it gets to feel any invitation that to maybe go somewhere with their breath that they usually don't during sex or just during, yeah, like intimate experiences.
• 1:21:42
  Yeah, I think in general, like if you can slow your breathing down, you feel better and you have better control over your body.
• 1:21:49
  So I guess especially performance anxiety on the male side, being able to find out where you want to get to and not go over the point or slow yourself down, I think is hugely intertwined with being able to think about your breathing because again, your mind can just run away on stuff and then you get too excited and then
• 1:22:10
  Yeah, being able to slow down and breathe.
• 1:22:12
  Again, you were talking about porn.
• 1:22:14
  There's so many things in porn that's just a bad example of how, like, there's so many things that are not exactly, not how you should operate.
• 1:22:24
  And again, I think if you can, just slowing your breathing down.
• 1:22:27
  Often there's loads of, like, panting and et cetera.
• 1:22:29
  If you take little timeouts and you breathe through your nose and slow it down, you'll just slow yourself down and you'll bring yourself...
• 1:22:36
  It's what I was saying earlier about aligning where your head is to where your body is.
• 1:22:42
  Sex is a good one because you are often very much in the moment.
• 1:22:47
  So you don't always need your breathing to pull you back into the moment during sex.
• 1:22:50
  But I think you can use it to just slow yourself down and really like not have these run away.
• 1:22:57
  It's lack of rumination of the mind is one of the best things with breathwork.
• 1:23:01
  Yeah.
• 1:23:03
  And yeah, there's loads of, as you touched on, tantra, all of these.
• 1:23:06
  Stuff with yoga and stuff with like almost most wellness practices ever integrate breathing into it.
• 1:23:11
  Definitely.
• 1:23:13
  It underpins almost everything you do.
• 1:23:16
  And again, yeah, I think there's a massive place in the bedroom for it.
• 1:23:20
  That's beautiful.
• 1:23:21
  It also is cool because you can breathe anywhere, so it can also elongate.
• 1:23:26
  I think a lot of people want, especially with women, sometimes you want that build up.
• 1:23:33
  And I think whether you're at dinner, wherever you are, the breathing can start...
• 1:23:40
  foreshadow everything that is like unfolding you can breathe anyway that's like a kind of cool it could be like an erotic practice but you can take it any way you want so it's pretty cool yeah and i also think not that i can talk on the female sexual experience but i think in a
• 1:23:56
  partnership is super important to feel safe right and again it's another when you're in this calmer side of your nervous system it's where you tell your body you're safe and that's most of what breathing practices is doing when your body gets a bit agitated it's like i need to get out of here you can use it to shift your state and tell yourself you feel safe and i think again just in the bedroom it's a really important
• 1:24:19
  place to feel safe to feel who you are to feel like you can be who you want to be to feel like you're held all of these things are super important and again it's way harder to think your way into that side of your nervous system you can set telling yourself this is the right person i feel good i feel whatever um and if it is and it feels right if you do your breathing you will your body will feel it because it's a two-way communication channel
• 1:24:44
  Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
• 1:24:46
  And I love what you said about the pause and like the timeouts, because sometimes even in a conversation with my best friend or like there's moments where just asking someone, OK, can we just take a moment and like breathe together?
• 1:24:58
  Like that's such a lovely, like beautiful invitation.
• 1:25:01
  That could be the most vulnerable aspect of what you're doing.
• 1:25:04
  um and it's so wonderful for both of you so I love that it's like the beginning but also during and then the safety it can create we're both all in our heads so much and like thinking about how we look how we sound how we seem and so like coming to the present moment coming into the present moment of of breathing and being present with what's here I think that could be so powerful I wish I wish for everyone to do that that's beautiful it does excite me I feel like there's so much to be like
• 1:25:32
  you know, in despair about in the world, but like the access to this information that can like really heal and change lives and change the way we experience each other in life is just so exciting to me, you know, that like people can receive information like this, learn from people like you and like change their whole life.
• 1:25:48
  Pretty easy, you know, pretty, and not that intense of an effort, just do your five minutes, three times a day, everyone, and we can rebuild the world.
• 1:25:57
  I believe, I'm like a radical optimist.
• 1:26:01
  I love that.
• 1:26:02
  Yeah.
• 1:26:02
  Thank you.
• 1:26:04
  Any other advice on the like sensual, sexual experience side of the breath?
• 1:26:10
  Well, you can call it.
• 1:26:12
  Yeah.
• 1:26:13
  I think it sounds better coming from you, actually.
• 1:26:14
  When I say it, it's almost like I trip over it.
• 1:26:16
  Really?
• 1:26:17
  Yeah.
• 1:26:17
  Yeah, I guess it's authentic to me.
• 1:26:18
  I don't have to.
• 1:26:19
  Do you know what I mean?
• 1:26:20
  This is it.
• 1:26:20
  However it comes across for you.
• 1:26:21
  Yes.
• 1:26:22
  and it definitely sounds better coming for you oh thank you i'll take it um any other advice on the sensual side using your breathing off the top of my head i think i've covered most of it
• 1:26:37
  Yeah, just really allowing yourself to step into the moment, slowing yourself down.
• 1:26:41
  It's strange because even when you just said like, if you're having an argument with someone or let's say you're in a sexual encounter and you were just to say, can we just take a moment and breathe?
• 1:26:52
  Even that to me just sounds weird.
• 1:26:54
  Yeah, interesting.
• 1:26:55
  Like, I know teaching how amazing that would be for both.
• 1:27:01
  I can't imagine a scenario right now where I'm in an argument and I'm like, can we just...
• 1:27:06
  I can imagine it in bed beforehand because I've done it.
• 1:27:11
  And even during, to take a moment, like, as you say it, this is what I mean by the...
• 1:27:19
  And this is what these are the most interesting parts.
• 1:27:20
  But this is what I was saying earlier about like the perception shift that's happened in, for instance, running.
• 1:27:25
  You're like, do you want to come to a run club?
• 1:27:28
  And you're like, sick, that sounds wavy.
• 1:27:31
  Whereas before you like, do you want to go running?
• 1:27:33
  You're like, I'm not really the closest shit.
• 1:27:36
  Like, even as you say that there's still and this is one of the things I wanted that I cannot wait to be part of the shift.
• 1:27:41
  Yeah.
• 1:27:41
  It's mad even when you say if we're just in the argument, I can't yet imagine myself in an argument with a mate just being like, can we just do some breathing together?
• 1:27:50
  But when you say to people, we should just go and take a breath or take a moment or take a breather, that almost feels like it is something that you would do.
• 1:27:59
  And maybe when you take a breather, you do it on your own.
• 1:28:02
  But even together, yeah, I can't.
• 1:28:03
  Do you know what I mean?
• 1:28:04
  It's strange because this is the thing that I'm trying to shift.
• 1:28:07
  But at the moment, I don't think it's there yet.
• 1:28:09
  What do you feel like comes up for you as you hear it that doesn't resonate?
• 1:28:14
  I can't envisage me in an argument with someone.
• 1:28:16
  One, having the presence of mind to do that.
• 1:28:18
  Yeah.
• 1:28:19
  Insane to have that kind of level of composure to be like, let's just take it.
• 1:28:24
  Take a breath works.
• 1:28:25
  Like, take a breather.
• 1:28:27
  Take a step back.
• 1:28:29
  But with someone that you're combative with, to sit down and just do a breathing thing together, at the moment, it doesn't...
• 1:28:35
  I want to get to that world.
• 1:28:36
  That's what, a part of what...
• 1:28:39
  But I... Because it feels so foreign because no one's ever...
• 1:28:44
  done it yet or not no one's ever done it it's just because it's not natural or not something people always do but in when you're saying like where can breathing take us and what if in 10 years or 20 years you have these moments where people are it's so ingrained it's so natural it's so normal that in these high pressure moments when you're you we both know if we just sit and do three deep breaths in together we'll come out of it feeling a completely different way but even at the moment i can't yet get there which is so exciting because i'm not sure if you're not
• 1:29:11
  When we do get there, the world will just be a better place.
• 1:29:15
  Wow.
• 1:29:16
  Thank you for your honesty.
• 1:29:17
  Like just sharing these internal reactions you're having, because I'm sure the person experiencing this is also having those moments where they're like, I wouldn't do that.
• 1:29:24
  Like that's something they say on a podcast that no one actually does.
• 1:29:29
  So yeah, it's actually, it is interesting, but it is proof of the space there is to grow into it.
• 1:29:34
  And I've done, I've offered that or like I've done the thing where it's like, do you want to like, do you want to say what we're both grateful for?
• 1:29:43
  in each other at this moment.
• 1:29:44
  And sometimes people cannot.
• 1:29:45
  They're like, girl, I'm too dysregulated.
• 1:29:49
  I've done that with partners I've had, where you just can't go there.
• 1:29:53
  You maybe feel too, you're in a conflict situation and then someone's like, can we breathe?
• 1:29:58
  It's like, what?
• 1:29:59
  breathe.
• 1:30:00
  That sounds terrible.
• 1:30:01
  Why would we do that?
• 1:30:02
  And it's the moments we need it most.
• 1:30:04
  But it's quite vulnerable to ask it as well, because you feel vulnerable.
• 1:30:08
  You're like, I sound, you know, a certain way maybe.
• 1:30:11
  But I do think that's like what's for the best.
• 1:30:13
  But we're not there yet.
• 1:30:14
  But it's nice when you have that.
• 1:30:16
  My mom does that.
• 1:30:16
  She's like, let's just breathe.
• 1:30:19
  And I'm like, it's, yeah, because she's a yoga, she's done yoga for a really long time.
• 1:30:24
  And she's very good at like, regulating herself and like the room.
• 1:30:29
  More and more so like over time, because yeah.
• 1:30:32
  But I imagine with parents, oh my gosh, like I do eventually want to, well, I do want to be a mom.
• 1:30:37
  And I feel like that capacity to like, regulate my own nervous system will be extremely helpful for that child.
• 1:30:45
  And I think 100%.
• 1:30:46
  I want to touch on something you said as well, because I actually think the first step is internal, always.
• 1:30:56
  I actually think with almost everything, whenever something goes wrong, I'm usually like, is there something I could have done to...
• 1:31:02
  not have led this to this position because it's so much easier to work on or to just reflect on if there was something that you could have done rather than just blaming the world because easier to i don't want to say change but improve or not do something again in yourself than change someone else to start with
• 1:31:19
  And on that, I think once you become more of a regulated person, as we were talking about co-regulation, you end up regulating those around you, right?
• 1:31:28
  And then you actually just end up in less of these arguments where you might need to be like, can we just take a... Like, I can't remember the last time.
• 1:31:36
  I can remember the last time I actually lost my head in... You know, when you're texting and like...
• 1:31:42
  Honestly, you pop out an hour late.
• 1:31:45
  You shouldn't have sent any of that.
• 1:31:49
  Any of that.
• 1:31:51
  And for me, it was luckily I don't get it often.
• 1:31:53
  And it was years ago and it was my dad.
• 1:31:55
  My dad's got Alzheimer's.
• 1:31:57
  So it's even more stupid for me to have been in that position because he doesn't even have the capacity to.
• 1:32:01
  The thing we were...
• 1:32:02
  Honestly, this is a stupid story.
• 1:32:04
  I used to get stuff sent to my dad's yard.
• 1:32:08
  And I bailed him and I've got something accidentally delivered there.
• 1:32:11
  And I'm like, do you have it?
• 1:32:13
  And he's like, no, I've been there.
• 1:32:14
  I'm like, why have you been there?
• 1:32:15
  He's like, well, because it turned up and it wasn't whatever.
• 1:32:17
  Blah, blah, blah.
• 1:32:18
  We got into it and I'm fuming.
• 1:32:19
  I'm livid.
• 1:32:20
  I've gone, bap, bap, bap, bap, texting.
• 1:32:22
  Our layer.
• 1:32:22
  He's like, I'm never speaking to you again.
• 1:32:24
  Blah, blah, blah.
• 1:32:25
  It's so stupid for me because I've been on a journey of learning.
• 1:32:27
  His head, his mind's going.
• 1:32:29
  So...
• 1:32:30
  And the next time I go to Dad's, the thing that he said he'd thrown out was on the side.
• 1:32:35
  He hadn't thrown it out.
• 1:32:36
  But because people with Alzheimer's, they just sort of like create a world they think happen.
• 1:32:40
  So I got in a whole nonsense over something that even not even happened.
• 1:32:44
  And luckily, the good side of Alzheimer's is the next day he'd forgotten that we'd had to argue with it and we're just back chopping it up.
• 1:32:50
  But I remember just being like, and it just went on a blurt, blinked.
• 1:32:53
  But to go back to what I was going to say, I think when you end up learning to regulate yourself more and you end up being a calmer person,
• 1:32:59
  It has a ripple effect on those around you.
• 1:33:02
  And you end up less in these arguments where you might need to be like, can we both just take a moment?
• 1:33:07
  Because whatever probably triggered it isn't that deep in the first place.
• 1:33:11
  And if I could go back, and now I hardly ever argue, because it doesn't make any sense to argue with someone I can't formulate.
• 1:33:20
  It doesn't have any.
• 1:33:21
  But my patience has got so much better.
• 1:33:24
  One, probably through learning to manage an illness like that.
• 1:33:29
  See, I just want to touch on that because you said with your mum, like after years of yoga, she's amazing at doing that.
• 1:33:34
  And I think sometimes you interact with people and then they're super calm or chilled and you get chatting to them and they're like, oh yeah, I've meditated every day for 10 years.
• 1:33:43
  And you're like, I can actually, now I know that I could feel that.
• 1:33:46
  being around you they almost talk softer more slowly it's not like they don't get wound up or angry but they're just when you're in their presence you feel and again to go back to what something you asked me ages ago what happens if breathwork becomes i think generally the frequency of people bopping about will just take a few notches down
• 1:34:09
  Oh, my word.
• 1:34:10
  Thank you for sharing the story about your dad.
• 1:34:12
  I feel like it's also so important for people to like see the humanity of people.
• 1:34:16
  And we all like overreact or like just react in ways that make no sense.
• 1:34:20
  Or like it's like, why did you do that?
• 1:34:21
  But we grow and we learn.
• 1:34:23
  And also it's.
• 1:34:25
  It's so human to feel like this box is like it's a symbol.
• 1:34:29
  It's not about the box.
• 1:34:30
  It's the fact that you it's so funny.
• 1:34:32
  And then also that what you shared now about.
• 1:34:37
  Oh, like being in the presence of someone who is in that state, it's it's confronting.
• 1:34:42
  I just met a guy like that the other day and he was just so I'm creating my first song.
• 1:34:47
  So I'm in a very like vulnerable like it felt very vulnerable.
• 1:34:49
  He's a producer.
• 1:34:50
  I was meeting him and I was like, whatever.
• 1:34:51
  am I doing?
• 1:34:51
  And I was like, and I was like, and he was just like, so calm.
• 1:34:55
  It was actually, but it's quite, it's quite intense.
• 1:34:57
  It's beautiful, but like an intense calm.
• 1:35:00
  And you're like, whoa, you, you have done some work on yourself.
• 1:35:03
  So yeah, it's so true.
• 1:35:04
  And that calmed me down so much.
• 1:35:06
  As you said, the collective, like calming down, being less reactive, being more like, okay, speaking softer, like you said, and my mom also, yeah, yoga and also meditates.
• 1:35:16
  And so that also
• 1:35:19
  brings you down but it's it's all the invisible work you're doing and a lot of us creating that space can feel challenging but it's so worth it because it affects the entire family community ecosystem hmm wow what a world that could be hmm
• 1:35:47
  So we will soon have our closing ritual.
• 1:35:50
  But before we get to that, is there anything lingering that you would like to go into, share, or that you hope that the person watching this takes away from this conversation?
• 1:36:00
  I would say, I think.
• 1:36:04
  Everything that I'm trying to, we've talked about so much in the space.
• 1:36:09
  And a lot of it for me is trying to just remove hurdles and barriers to entry.
• 1:36:16
  Um, and we talked about people of color and men.
• 1:36:19
  The reason I talk about them more is because I feel like less of them pop into the space.
• 1:36:24
  So barriers or the hurdles are at the moment preventing them step into the space more.
• 1:36:29
  But it's not just for, it's for absolutely anyone.
• 1:36:32
  So anyone who's looked at the breathwork space and is a bit like, it's a bit naff or why would I pay for something I want to do or whatever it might be.
• 1:36:41
  I don't need to be the person you resonate with, but just have a little think on what it is in the space that's put you off stepping into it because there will be someone for everyone.
• 1:36:54
  And I'm such an avid believer having...
• 1:36:57
  Experience and now teach it That the practice is one of the best things you can learn For everyone It's literally for everyone Everyone should experience, understand Even part of it's the educational side Like just understanding That if you're in a So I had, when I was younger, asthma Had an asthma attack I remember having a panic attack Whenever the paramedics get to you In these big, when you're having a bad
• 1:37:26
  breathing related attack basically.
• 1:37:28
  The first thing they do is tell you to focus on your exhales.
• 1:37:31
  So I was probably six or seven when I had an asthma attack.
• 1:37:34
  Get in, focus on your exhales because you feel like you can't breathe.
• 1:37:38
  And when you do that, you try and take more air in and you forget to breathe out.
• 1:37:42
  It's like focus on your exhales and it will calm you down.
• 1:37:44
  And I remember from that, I've done big injuries where I've broken legs and snapped knees and stuff.
• 1:37:48
  And on my own, after that asthma attack, I knew that as I was...
• 1:37:54
  Pain's coming and you go into shock, I would just sit and focus on my exhales.
• 1:37:58
  And so many...
• 1:37:59
  I didn't go into shock in a few of them, but...
• 1:38:02
  The point I'm making is just understanding the knowledge that you have a tool that can calm yourself down when every alarm bells going off and you've broken bones or as we talked about a lot of presentations or whenever you get nervous.
• 1:38:16
  I think just the understanding that you have this emergency lever you can pull that can calm you down is as powerful.
• 1:38:22
  The practice itself is super powerful, but it's it's like my younger brother has.
• 1:38:29
  A nut allergy.
• 1:38:30
  Same.
• 1:38:31
  So just the knowledge that you have your EpiPen on you, if something goes haywire and you have the capacity to not die, just to bring your system back, just having that on you is super powerful.
• 1:38:46
  And I think we always have our breathing on us, but we don't understand that it is a tool that can help us in the same manner that EpiPens might help someone with an allergy or...
• 1:38:56
  And I think just that part of it.
• 1:38:57
  So I think to take away one is the education that you have this tool on you and you might never have been shown how to use it, but it's always with you.
• 1:39:04
  And if your system spiraling, you can pull on it and it will calm you down.
• 1:39:08
  And the second is I just think everyone needs to understand and try breathwear.
• 1:39:15
  And that doesn't matter if I'm not the face that you resonate with or the person or the vibe.
• 1:39:21
  But there will be someone out there for you.
• 1:39:23
  And whatever the hurdle is that you originally decided you didn't want to jump into it, just have a look at that and then just pivot because there'll be someone.
• 1:39:31
  Some people love the tarot cards.
• 1:39:34
  And the guy I taught, I learned in South Africa in a mad spiritual month.
• 1:39:40
  um altars and crystals and feathers and um shamanic stuff and it was amazing um it isn't the way i want to teach but some people resonate with that massively and there isn't there is 100 a space and reason and need for those people teaching in that way there's also a need for people maybe stripping it back and teaching in my way and there's loads of shades along in between there's more um
• 1:40:06
  So yeah, I think whatever your reason for not interacting with the space so far, don't let that one thing put you off the space as a whole because there will be a person for you.
• 1:40:16
  And it's such an amazing practice.
• 1:40:18
  Everyone watching everyone in the world would benefit from incorporating into their lives.
• 1:40:25
  Thank you so much for that.
• 1:40:27
  That's so generous to say, I believe in this so much that even if I'm not your gateway into it, it's still this magical forest, you have to enter it or like this beautiful place that we all need as humans, we all breathe.
• 1:40:39
  And so therefore, we all deserve and need this education.
• 1:40:44
  And also what you said about the EpiPen, like just the knowledge that it's there can be so helpful.
• 1:40:56
  Yeah, and that analogy really, it does very much resonate with me.
• 1:41:03
  I really, really feel like I really admire that you don't hear a lot of teachers say that like, it's the thing itself and I may not be your path into the thing, but the thing itself is so beautiful that you must go.
• 1:41:16
  That's really selfless.
• 1:41:17
  I think that's really wonderful.
• 1:41:21
  Yeah, it's funny because I hope that both of my older brothers, I would love for them to do breathwork.
• 1:41:29
  And I just haven't had the right entry point because there's the apps and there's things and stuff.
• 1:41:34
  But I feel like events like yours are so meaningful to so many people.
• 1:41:38
  But I feel like they'd be more inclined to that.
• 1:41:40
  Who knows?
• 1:41:42
  Maybe they'll be at one of your events someday, some way.
• 1:41:45
  Wow.
• 1:41:46
  I feel like it's been so wonderful, like learning from you.
• 1:41:49
  And I love that you have a very clear point of view on what's happening.
• 1:41:54
  where you fit into the space and that you're also honest about the ways you're still figuring that out.
• 1:41:59
  Um, and that like, you know, sort of, you're in touch with your own authenticity, which then allows people to like access that through you.
• 1:42:06
  I think that's really beautiful.
• 1:42:08
  Um, and then just like your curiosity about like the space and I'm sure there's so much more you're learning from your masters and just that I love like that energy of just someone who just wants to keep learning and understanding and be open and,
• 1:42:22
  Um, it's beautiful.
• 1:42:24
  So I'm grateful.
• 1:42:25
  I think this is our first conversation.
• 1:42:27
  So it's a cool, it's such a cool way to get to know someone because it's like you get to go places that maybe you wouldn't have gone.
• 1:42:33
  Um, but we're going to go to our closing ritual.
• 1:42:35
  So I feel like you shared what you want to share before then.
• 1:42:38
  And then we'll also share all your socials and where people can find you.
• 1:42:42
  Um, where can people find you?
• 1:42:45
  So across everything, it's the same.
• 1:42:47
  Okay.
• 1:42:47
  The breath work brought up.
• 1:42:48
  Perfect.
• 1:42:49
  Magical.
• 1:42:50
  Okay.
• 1:42:51
  So this is the Soul Salon closing.
• 1:42:53
  So the first question, oh, basically it's one to two sentences that just come to you to share.
• 1:42:58
  And then afterwards, if you have anything more you want to share, you're welcome to do so.
• 1:43:01
  But the first question is, a song that changed me forever.
• 1:43:06
  Is Bob Marley.
• 1:43:12
  No Woman No Cry.
• 1:43:14
  Hmm.
• 1:43:15
  Hmm.
• 1:43:17
  Do you want to say more about what it means to you?
• 1:43:21
  Dad's Jamaican.
• 1:43:22
  He used to play Bob Marley in the house a lot.
• 1:43:27
  He can't sing at all.
• 1:43:30
  I am also a terrible singer, but it's just a ball around blaring it out.
• 1:43:37
  And it just reminds me of, sounds sad to say happier times, but I'm...
• 1:43:43
  Yeah, I've been to Jamaica a few times with him.
• 1:43:46
  Whenever you're, if you're ever in the Caribbean islands, it's just blaring everywhere.
• 1:43:52
  Went to see Bob Marley the Musical with him and he was in floods of tears.
• 1:43:55
  I was in tears just because he was in tears.
• 1:43:59
  And again, your, obviously it's your, like, music's, when you go through, I don't know if you've ever interacted with someone or been unfortunate, I guess, to have someone that's had dementia or Alzheimer's.
• 1:44:12
  But music is the one thing that cuts through.
• 1:44:14
  They remember song words.
• 1:44:19
  As we were talking about with, there are so many things that can help you regulate your nervous system.
• 1:44:24
  Breathing is just one.
• 1:44:25
  If you have a herbal tea late at night, it will calm your body down.
• 1:44:29
  But music, I've witnessed firsthand, has the power to shift people internally without them even... Dad's mine no longer.
• 1:44:39
  consciously understands but he's in a bad mood and you can put on bob marley especially that song and it'll he'll get up he smiles he starts um and i think it's just yeah that song specifically he loves one of the reasons i love whenever we're at um whenever i'm at his we always try and put it on in the morning just so he wakes up in a good mood so i think it's just so
• 1:45:02
  Yeah, I love, yeah.
• 1:45:03
  I mean, I love the song.
• 1:45:04
  I love the genre.
• 1:45:06
  And I think it means so much to me because it means so much to dad.
• 1:45:11
  Wow.
• 1:45:13
  That was so like heart opening and beautiful.
• 1:45:15
  Thank you for sharing that.
• 1:45:17
  So much love to your dad and your family.
• 1:45:19
  That idea that music cuts through like people like memory loss and the idea that people still remember the rhythm, the music, the words.
• 1:45:30
  It's like actually astounding.
• 1:45:31
  I mean, so beautiful.
• 1:45:33
  And sound healing and what's coming out around that.
• 1:45:35
  I feel like intuitively we know that.
• 1:45:37
  But the fact that it's also now being studied is really amazing.
• 1:45:40
  I mean, it's incredible what's possible through music and something we all share.
• 1:45:46
  And it's like you said earlier, if I'm not your breathwork person, it's like everyone has music they like.
• 1:45:51
  They may just not, you know.
• 1:45:52
  So, but wow.
• 1:45:53
  And the fact that your dad.
• 1:45:55
  Oh my word, I'm picturing you both watching the play in tears.
• 1:45:58
  I'm picturing this song that's been with you throughout so many chapters of your childhood and life and still now.
• 1:46:05
  So beautiful.
• 1:46:06
  Wow, thank you for that.
• 1:46:09
  No woman, no cry.
• 1:46:10
  Well, none of us will ever hear that song again the same way.
• 1:46:21
  The next question is...
• 1:46:25
  A book I recommend to everyone.
• 1:46:28
  Oh, man.
• 1:46:30
  I'm an avid reader.
• 1:46:32
  And as all of my friends will know, I just, every two months I have a different book that I'm like, you have to read this book.
• 1:46:40
  And then two months later, I'm like, you have to read this book.
• 1:46:44
  And as you were just talking then I think it's called Music is Medicine I think it's called Music is Medicine But it's written by neuroscientists And I love what you're just talking about Everyone's got the different song And also it shifts throughout life So one time a song you may have loved And then all of a sudden It reminds you of a breakup And you no longer love it And sound therapy is such an interest
• 1:47:03
  in world because the songs are different per person and they're different depending on the time you're in and the mood you're in and whatever else um the book that got me into breath work it's either breathe or breath by james nester i'm not sure which one it is that's an amazing book um
• 1:47:24
  I'm going to stay with that.
• 1:47:24
  Otherwise I'm going to start listing.
• 1:47:26
  I could go on for, I read so many books and I find them so interesting.
• 1:47:30
  Ooh, one more, one more.
• 1:47:31
  Um, one other book that I found super interesting.
• 1:47:35
  Let me, different books that are super interesting.
• 1:47:37
  So there's a book called Red Notice.
• 1:47:39
  Red Notice.
• 1:47:39
  Yeah.
• 1:47:40
  Which is like, it's like a real life drama, um, that really happened, which is super fascinating.
• 1:47:45
  Book called Never Split the Difference.
• 1:47:47
  Oh yes.
• 1:47:47
  Like negotiating.
• 1:47:48
  Yes.
• 1:47:48
  Super, super, super, super interesting book.
• 1:47:50
  Um, yeah,
• 1:47:53
  Yeah, there's two books that I was just trying to think of quite recently.
• 1:47:56
  And I'll just describe them.
• 1:47:58
  But it's essentially this guy talking about manifesting.
• 1:48:01
  Oh.
• 1:48:02
  Yeah.
• 1:48:03
  And he, and it's annoying me because I can't think of the name, but maybe at some point we can look it up and we can drop it in the comments or something.
• 1:48:12
  He's this kid and when he's younger, he's having a bit of a tough upbringing and randomly he goes into, ah, it's called Into the Magic Shop.
• 1:48:18
  Oh, yes.
• 1:48:19
  By the person who wrote mine.
• 1:48:21
  Yes, I've seen him on a podcast.
• 1:48:23
  Yes.
• 1:48:23
  And someone, a woman told her, yes, at a bookstore or something.
• 1:48:27
  Yes, a magic shop.
• 1:48:28
  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 1:48:28
  Into the magic shop.
• 1:48:29
  Yes, okay.
• 1:48:29
  It was a good job I explained it because I was like, he goes into a magic shop.
• 1:48:32
  Oh, you got it.
• 1:48:33
  Exactly.
• 1:48:33
  It was there.
• 1:48:34
  And he wrote a second book.
• 1:48:35
  Yes.
• 1:48:36
  Because the first one is like...
• 1:48:38
  his life and it's an amazing experience and he gives you little guided bits.
• 1:48:42
  And then the second book is more on the neuroscience behind how manifestation works.
• 1:48:47
  And it's almost like inception, you know, inception, the film where you plant in dreams in people, it's almost like planting your goals in your subconscious, but to do it, he goes through a whole thing where you have to, he does a body scan.
• 1:48:59
  So what we did at Soho House for the first five minutes where you're just relaxing your body with your attention and your breathing.
• 1:49:06
  But he's basically like, you cannot,
• 1:49:08
  It's a line where your subconscious wants to go until you put yourself in that calm state of your nervous system.
• 1:49:14
  So through whether it's through breath work or through body scan puts you in that state and then he goes through the science behind it.
• 1:49:19
  And I'm a massive nerd.
• 1:49:20
  But I thought that those two as a joint set of books were fascinating on.
• 1:49:25
  Yeah, kind of a line to breathe in.
• 1:49:26
  hmm amazing okay we'll put those in I'm so glad you got there that's so cool yes oh that sounds incredible into the magic shop body scan put us there into the state yes I think that I saw him on a podcast I can't remember whose and he was really really interesting talking about his childhood and where he just where he started and where he is now and and this woman believing in him at such a young age and now he's some doctor at all these you know
• 1:49:51
  This is exactly Yes Yes Oh my gosh He was so wonderful I totally get it That's beautiful Okay The next question is A person I carry with me In everything that I do Can it be me?
• 1:50:02
  Yes Yes it can I think me Hmm I was reeling through All the closest people in my head But I carry bits of all of them Um
• 1:50:14
  Initially went to my grandma and I was thinking my mum, my dad, my brother.
• 1:50:20
  They all shaped who I am and my experiences.
• 1:50:23
  But I don't turn up to everywhere and be like, I really do think I bring myself into every space that I step into.
• 1:50:30
  And that as a concept is evolving and learning and I, it's not a fixed self.
• 1:50:36
  I definitely will definitely turn up as me most places I go.
• 1:50:41
  Hmm.
• 1:50:45
  they'll resonate with a lot of people i feel like and it mirrors what you're saying about finding your authentic voice and brand and um and i think the breath is also such a beautiful beautiful every time i say it now i'm like but then i'm like no i under you can say whatever you like okay so funny
• 1:51:03
  Yeah, don't let me show you.
• 1:51:04
  Oh my God, it's so funny.
• 1:51:07
  But basically it brings you back to yourself because it's like a way of returning to you.
• 1:51:11
  So it's a really great practice and carrying with you, especially as you move, you know, and you're going into these different spaces, you're teaching and it is important to carry yourself with you.
• 1:51:23
  Okay, the next question is, don't let anyone tell you that.
• 1:51:26
  That's a question.
• 1:51:27
  I was like, what?
• 1:51:29
  Why shouldn't they tell me?
• 1:51:34
  Don't let anyone tell you that.
• 1:51:37
  My head has gone to that.
• 1:51:38
  You can't do it.
• 1:51:39
  It sounds quite cliche.
• 1:51:40
  It's true.
• 1:51:41
  But.
• 1:51:44
  Yeah, I don't know.
• 1:51:45
  To be fair, I don't think loads of people tell you that you can't.
• 1:51:48
  I think.
• 1:51:48
  I think.
• 1:51:49
  I had this with my mum one time, right?
• 1:51:51
  She was like, so when I, my degree or my first, the first time I went to uni, so yeah, my first degree was chemical engineering.
• 1:51:59
  I remember coming out of chem-eng, I was like, I don't want to be a chemical engineer.
• 1:52:03
  Again, like environmentally, sorry, from an environment, from the environment you were going to work in, I didn't want to be in like, I wanted to be in a big city.
• 1:52:11
  I don't want to be on a power plant anywhere.
• 1:52:15
  surrounded by different sets of people, blah, blah, blah.
• 1:52:17
  And I remember I came out and I was like, right, I'm going to teach myself finance.
• 1:52:20
  So when I finished this degree, I just spent six months at home and I was down, like all my mates had gone to London.
• 1:52:25
  It was like low mood, like I was just back in my parents' yard, you know, like 23, I think, and you feel like you should be an adult and you're clashing with them, blah, blah, blah.
• 1:52:37
  So the reason I was going to say this is I don't think loads of people tell you that you can't do stuff that...
• 1:52:41
  definitively anymore.
• 1:52:42
  I think most people like, but my mum, and I'm not sure if my mum's an amazing person, but I think often parents want what was best for them.
• 1:52:52
  And the world changes a little bit and they always want to protect you.
• 1:52:55
  And they always want you to be safe and secure.
• 1:52:57
  So often they're,
• 1:52:59
  impact is very much colored by that lens.
• 1:53:03
  I remember I'm like three or four months in and mum's just like, just be a chemical engineer.
• 1:53:08
  She's like, you're applying for all these jobs, you're not getting them.
• 1:53:11
  You have a master's in chemical engineering.
• 1:53:13
  You spent four years learning it.
• 1:53:14
  And she's not telling me I can't go and be in finance.
• 1:53:17
  She's just like, maybe the path of least resistance is
• 1:53:22
  chemical engineer and you could do it and you get paid well and blah blah blah um and i think sometimes people here's what i want to say i think sometimes people can accidentally impart on you a lack of risk taken and i think parents are especially especially if my mum wasn't entrepreneurial i think sometimes entrepreneurial parents are a bit like i'll actually go and try this my mum and dad weren't um i've
• 1:53:48
  Anyway, I think sometimes people can accidentally, as we talk about co-regulation and the vibe and the frequency, sometimes if you're around people that don't take risks or want to be safe all the time, they don't tell you you can't do it, but they're like, just try and stay.
• 1:54:00
  And the same, like when I was about to, I was like, I'm going to quit finance and teach breath work.
• 1:54:05
  And she's not like, she's now like, oh my God, go and do that.
• 1:54:07
  I love that you can like, it's just shifted a bit.
• 1:54:11
  I don't think actively people will tell you you can't do that, but sometimes the way they will talk to you is like, are you sure?
• 1:54:17
  And they kind of make you question.
• 1:54:19
  And like, I'm super lucky because my internal confidence is sky high.
• 1:54:24
  I'm just like, I truly believe I can just attempt anything.
• 1:54:28
  I'm not super scared of trying to do it.
• 1:54:31
  I think often some people around you can keep you keep you smalls, maybe not the right word, but stop you taking those risks.
• 1:54:39
  And like, so I've just quit finance.
• 1:54:43
  Stable salary, stable income, good income.
• 1:54:46
  super like I could go in by a place and have a comfortable life with the family and support them.
• 1:54:53
  Just torched it all to go and teach breath work in the wellness space, which is, I just, I just think it's again, it's not, don't let them tell you that you can't do it.
• 1:55:02
  It's just believe in you hard enough that you are like, I actually can step into this and do it.
• 1:55:09
  Not in a silly way.
• 1:55:10
  If you're going to quit, you know,
• 1:55:12
  a stable salary, make sure you've got savings.
• 1:55:15
  Do you know what I mean?
• 1:55:15
  Don't just throw caution to the wind.
• 1:55:17
  I do think that often, like it's like with everything, the boundaries of what we can do are always set by our own mind.
• 1:55:26
  But they can be impacted by the people around you.
• 1:55:29
  And I think because it's like once you remember the last year I ran two marathons in two days for a for my friend's charity called the Huntsman Trust.
• 1:55:38
  It's an amazing.
• 1:55:39
  And I remember like I'd never run a 10K before that.
• 1:55:43
  So every time you're in training, you get to 10K and you're like, oh, I can do this.
• 1:55:46
  And then you get to 12K and you're like, oh, I can do this.
• 1:55:48
  And then.
• 1:55:49
  blah blah blah and every time you get to a new boundary you're like oh i can get there so next one up is 15 next one up is 20 and next one up is a marathon whatever and i think that's like that with life when you start to push the boundaries and you get to a new place you've not been all of a sudden you're like oh that wasn't actually that scary and i got here and now i can do that and i think that's helping me now because i've changed
• 1:56:09
  I was super close with football.
• 1:56:11
  Then I went to uni.
• 1:56:12
  Then I didn't do chemical engineering.
• 1:56:13
  I went to finance.
• 1:56:14
  And I'm changing again.
• 1:56:15
  And I think I kind of know that I can do it.
• 1:56:17
  But you only know you can do it once you tried it the first time.
• 1:56:22
  So, again, I'm definitely weaving with this answer.
• 1:56:23
  And it's not two things.
• 1:56:25
  But I think let your boundaries be guided by yourself, not externally imparted.
• 1:56:31
  Mmm.
• 1:56:31
  Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh.
• 1:56:33
  Yes.
• 1:56:33
  Oh my word.
• 1:56:34
  I think so many of us can see ourselves in so many parts of that.
• 1:56:37
  Someone not explicitly saying don't do this, but subtly also projecting their fears onto you.
• 1:56:42
  And you also carry fears.
• 1:56:43
  So you're like, wait, yeah, maybe I am.
• 1:56:46
  Maybe this is crazy.
• 1:56:48
  And so like you have the boundaries of your mind and then they put these limits.
• 1:56:51
  But then that also sometimes reflects limits you also have in your mind.
• 1:56:55
  So you're like, wait, you know, and so it's like also I also believe when you're starting something, almost be careful who you tell because like you don't want energy too soon to disrupt the vibe when you're like it's just a little baby.
• 1:57:06
  It needs like a protected.
• 1:57:08
  It's not ready to like, you know.
• 1:57:10
  So, yeah, I totally I know our parents just want us to be safe and OK, you know, and that's they're like, no, but this is what's safe.
• 1:57:16
  This is what we do.
• 1:57:16
  We follow the path we were already on and the suncast fallacy and all these things.
• 1:57:20
  So I really resonates with me.
• 1:57:23
  And then they get to grow also and learn from us.
• 1:57:25
  It's a pretty cool.
• 1:57:27
  We both like teach each other so much.
• 1:57:29
  But, yeah, that I feel I had a sort of very I really relate to that path.
• 1:57:34
  And I think so many people do.
• 1:57:36
  Yeah.
• 1:57:39
  Wow.
• 1:57:39
  But the courage of like walking away from that life, I think is really powerful of like, you know, you said comfortable by how like the financial security of it.
• 1:57:50
  But I also do believe that like the abundance that will come from this in the long run will be like it's just going to be so much more expansive and multidimensional.
• 1:57:59
  Like it's all it's all coming.
• 1:58:00
  It's just at different times.
• 1:58:01
  That's what I believe.
• 1:58:03
  OK, the next question, the last question is.
• 1:58:07
  If actually two last questions, we could heal the planet by.
• 1:58:11
  Breathe in.
• 1:58:12
  Ooh, so funny.
• 1:58:14
  You should say that.
• 1:58:15
  No clue.
• 1:58:16
  What?
• 1:58:17
  Okay, beautiful.
• 1:58:18
  We could heal the planet by breathing.
• 1:58:20
  And you've just explained to us how for two hours.
• 1:58:22
  So we thank you.
• 1:58:23
  And hopefully we all believe that now in a different way.
• 1:58:26
  I definitely like believed it, but I believe it now in like a different way.
• 1:58:29
  I'm like, yes.
• 1:58:31
  Reduce the frequency.
• 1:58:32
  Be less reactive.
• 1:58:33
  Be kinder.
• 1:58:33
  Be calmer.
• 1:58:34
  Be more well.
• 1:58:36
  Okay.
• 1:58:36
  Last question is, if my inner child walked through that door, I would say to him,
• 1:58:41
  I would say to him to play and enjoy it more.
• 1:58:50
  I think that.
• 1:58:57
  You, so when I was growing up, so we definitely played and enjoyed and, but life's just, we're not that old, but it moves so quick.
• 1:59:08
  And when you're a kid, you always just want to grow up.
• 1:59:11
  Um, and yeah, I think just, it's so hard because as we were saying, kids' brains actually don't develop, but just enjoy.
• 1:59:25
  it as much as you can and i'd also say to him that you're actually doing really well um because when i was growing up we had loads of pressures on various bits and some parts were um and mine was all football related actually um and i remember like i used to have this like i used to really have this performance anxiety with football
• 1:59:52
  and so my dad used to play properly me and my brother were good growing up but like two out of ten times i'd do it i was amazing and like the other eight and we were academies and all this sort of stuff but the other eight i was just like a mess basically i couldn't work out how to perform i couldn't get my head in the right space i couldn't like and it was like jacqueline hyde um so i had all this like
• 2:00:16
  stress and strain on whether i could sort out my performance just make to and i could have done with breathing and i didn't know at the time but
• 2:00:27
  A lot of those moments I look back and I'm like, I could have like, this is where you, this is where you want to be.
• 2:00:33
  So just enjoy.
• 2:00:34
  It's almost like, and I got this from my younger brother, actually.
• 2:00:37
  He was giving advice to, so my younger brother played professionally.
• 2:00:40
  He was giving advice to one of our, my, I don't even know how to describe this.
• 2:00:46
  My older brother, who's a half brother, has a half brother who's young.
• 2:00:49
  So I don't know who that is in.
• 2:00:53
  But my younger brother was explaining to him, he was nervous before playing.
• 2:00:57
  He's quite good at rugby.
• 2:00:58
  He's playing the cup final or something or he's trialing for a good team.
• 2:01:02
  And my younger brother, I overheard him and he was like, listen, what do you want to do?
• 2:01:05
  You have more fun going out and playing with the best players, you know, or like people that are terrible that you don't like.
• 2:01:11
  If you're trying to push yourself, obviously playing with your mates.
• 2:01:14
  And but he's like, do you dream of playing on the biggest stage with the best people?
• 2:01:18
  So if that's what you're dreaming of doing, flip the narrative about being scared to go and do it and just be excited to go and step into your dream.
• 2:01:25
  And I think when you're younger, there's loads of times when I stepped out and I was just really worried about how I'd perform.
• 2:01:32
  And these moments where you need to give a big presentation to bring it back to work or whatever.
• 2:01:35
  But you're like, these are the moments that you actually dream of.
• 2:01:38
  You dream of being that person on that stage of whether it's a singing career or whatever it might be.
• 2:01:42
  You dream of those moments.
• 2:01:43
  So yeah.
• 2:01:44
  To get the night before and be so worried that you can't perform is completely counterintuitive.
• 2:01:48
  And now I'm way better at it.
• 2:01:49
  Like I just step in and I'm like, this is the moment I've been... You still can be nervous, there's no, but it's an excited nerves.
• 2:01:57
  You're like, this is where I'm meant to be.
• 2:01:59
  This is who I'm meant to be.
• 2:01:59
  And I get the opportunity.
• 2:02:01
  It's a privilege to go and just be on this stage, whether it's a game or a stage or whatever it might be.
• 2:02:06
  When I was younger, I really struggled with that.
• 2:02:10
  And I wish for those moments, I'd just...
• 2:02:14
  enjoyed it more rather than being so worked up about whether I was going to perform good or bad.
• 2:02:18
  So yeah, I'll tell him to enjoy the journey, smile, laugh.
• 2:02:25
  It'll work itself out.
• 2:02:27
  Hmm.
• 2:02:28
  Hmm.
• 2:02:28
  Thank you so much for sharing that.
• 2:02:30
  You're a great storyteller.
• 2:02:31
  You're taking us many places.
• 2:02:32
  I'm like, I'm there with you.
• 2:02:33
  Wow.
• 2:02:35
  Oh my word.
• 2:02:36
  Yeah.
• 2:02:37
  I feel like that advice to him and to enjoying and presence and that two out of eight, two out of 10 that resonated with me so much because I used to play piano.
• 2:02:47
  And when I performed, I'd get so nervous.
• 2:02:49
  Like I just, I feel like such a resonance what you're saying.
• 2:02:53
  And like, oh, my word, like so, so, so nervous.
• 2:02:55
  And I can't imagine if I had a tool like Breathwork, what that would have unlocked.
• 2:02:59
  But that feeling of like, you don't know how long you'll be able to do this.
• 2:03:04
  You don't know what's going to happen.
• 2:03:05
  So just enjoy it while you still you still can.
• 2:03:07
  And that's
• 2:03:10
  oh wow what a what a different like childhood that would have been if we had like if you had enjoyed that that time playing and then I mean more and same I feel like a lot of us can feel seen by that because oh oh my gosh the anxiety performance anxiety yes yes yes yes
• 2:03:26
  like the whole world was in this game and how well you did or in this piece and how well it was and then i actually ended up quitting because i just it was ended up being so much pressure um and then i didn't find a way to just do it in a low pressure way so i feel like i don't know just took me there it was like took me to my to my own childhood um it's powerful that stories can do that
• 2:03:50
  Well, it looks like you're embodying that now.
• 2:03:52
  So you're giving yourself the wisdom that you always needed and the world.
• 2:03:57
  Imagine children growing up with like breathwork.
• 2:04:00
  that's so cool they'll be like oh my god i'm having a moment i need to breathe oh my word beautiful well danny it's been such a pleasure thank you so much for stopping by thank you for being on the soul salon i am so excited for more of you to tap into danny's work and world and hopefully we'll see you at one of his events someday wherever they may be and yeah it's just a gift that we get to have this time and have these conversations and any closing uh thoughts or questions from you
• 2:04:28
  I have nothing else, but thank you so much for having me on.
• 2:04:31
  It's been amazing.
• 2:04:33
  Yeah, loved the conversation, loved where it took us, loved weaving through, so...
• 2:04:38
  Thank you.
• 2:04:39
  Beautiful.
• 2:04:39
  Yes, my word for this conversation is weave.
• 2:04:41
  Thank you so much.
• 2:04:43
  Perfect.
• 2:04:43
  Thank you.
• 2:04:44
  Thank you so much, everyone, for traveling with us, for weaving with us.
• 2:04:47
  It's been such a gift and a journey.
• 2:04:49
  Remember to check out Dani's page below at the Breathwork Brother and also to tap into the Coherence Resonance Breathing.
• 2:04:58
  Please do let us know if you do try it out.
• 2:05:00
  You can DM Dani.
• 2:05:01
  You can comment below this episode and this video and let's get the
• 2:05:08
  resonating, calming down.
• 2:05:11
  And it starts with each of us regulating ourselves like Dani beautifully shared.
• 2:05:14
  I'm sending so much love to you and I will see you soon.
• 2:05:19
  My darling, my love, my soul sibling, thank you for stepping into the soul salon.
• 2:05:24
  If you are still hearing or watching this, we are soul siblings.
• 2:05:28
  We are resonating on the same frequency.
• 2:05:30
  And so something you may struggle with that I struggle with is the fear of being seen.
• 2:05:35
  You know that visibility is involved in you living your creative purpose and being in your power.
• 2:05:41
  serving the collective through your gifts, through your magic, through your medicine.
• 2:05:45
  In order to do that, you know you need to be more seen than you are allowing yourself to be right now.
• 2:05:52
  I have a gift just for you, heart made for us on this frequency.
• 2:05:57
  And it is a free ebook called the soulful visibility guide that is soulful visibility.
• 2:06:03
  Like we don't just want to be seen.
• 2:06:04
  We want to be felt.
• 2:06:05
  We want to be heard.
• 2:06:07
  We want to move and be moved.
• 2:06:09
  So I do have a free gift for you.
• 2:06:11
  And all you need to do is go to my website.
• 2:06:13
  I understood.com.
• 2:06:15
  And there you will be able to input your email address and receive this directly to your inbox.
• 2:06:21
  This is such a juicy and delicious guide.
• 2:06:24
  And I change the free offering every few months.
• 2:06:27
  So, you know, get it while you can.
• 2:06:29
  All the links are in the show notes.
• 2:06:30
  So thank you so much.
• 2:06:31
  I love you.
• 2:06:32
  And I will see you on the next Soul Session.
• 2:06:34
  Okay.
• 2:06:35
  I love you.
• 2:06:35
  Bye.