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Transcript

Find Your Actor Friends · The Aligned Actor

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Hello and welcome back to the Aligned Actor pod tube stack.
• 0:05
  That's what I'm now calling this because I think it's fun and I
• 0:09
  like combining words.
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_00: Nobody can stop me.
• 0:14
  SPEAKER_00: Cannot be stopped.
• 0:14
  SPEAKER_00: Can't stop, won't stop.
• 0:16
  SPEAKER_00: I have a little friend with me today.
• 0:18
  SPEAKER_00: That's Dusty.
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_00: That's my dog.
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_00: And he's here because I think he's not feeling so well.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_00: So he wants to be around me.
• 0:26
  And also this works out really well because today's topic is
• 0:30
  about friends and
• 0:33
  SPEAKER_00: finding your actor friends.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_00: So just as a reminder, I'm Amy Schlerb.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_00: I'm a mindfulness and mindset coach for actors,
• 0:41
  SPEAKER_00: helping actors ride the actor's life,
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_00: crazy ups and downs,
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_00: twists and turns rollercoaster of being an actor without throwing up,
• 0:52
  SPEAKER_00: without blowing chunks all over everybody,
• 0:54
  but instead gracefully moving with all those twists and turns
• 0:58
  and ups and downs and
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_00: all of that stuff.
• 1:01
  so that we can have more satisfying,
• 1:04
  more fulfilling,
• 1:05
  calmer,
• 1:06
  more stable lives in general.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_00: And this is part two of a letter to young actor Amy,
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_00: and it is all about find your actor friends.
• 1:18
  So we're going to dive in to what I wrote to myself and spoke
• 1:23
  about to myself back
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_00: in the day on the podcast.
• 1:27
  And we're just going to start reading so that then we can talk
• 1:30
  about it afterwards.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_00: And it's a good one today, I think.
• 1:35
  Having some actor pals is really,
• 1:37
  really helpful when you're starting out.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_00: These people are gonna get you.
• 1:42
  They're gonna be cool if you make plans and then have to cancel
• 1:45
  because an audition comes up.
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_00: They're gonna be people you can share information and resources with,
• 1:50
  SPEAKER_00: headshot photographers,
• 1:51
  SPEAKER_00: classes,
• 1:52
  SPEAKER_00: agents,
• 1:53
  SPEAKER_00: workshops.
• 1:54
  They also will understand stuff about your career that your
• 1:57
  family and non-actor
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_00: friends just never will.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_00: So for example,
• 2:03
  Let's say that you keep getting called in to audition for the
• 2:06
  same casting director
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_00: a dozen times,
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_00: but you keep not booking.
• 2:10
  SPEAKER_00: Your family might think, what's wrong with you?
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_00: Why can't you convert?
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_00: But your actor friends are going to know that you're really good.
• 2:17
  SPEAKER_00: This casting director obviously is a huge fan of your work.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_00: And for whatever reason, the right role just hasn't come up for you yet.
• 2:25
  So your actor pals are going to be able to help you stay smart
• 2:29
  and optimistic about
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_00: your career and your craft,
• 2:31
  whereas your family might have you spiraling down and
• 2:34
  questioning yourself.
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe I really suck.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe they're just bringing me in to make the other actors look better.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe I need to change my look or my skills or whatever.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_00: When the truth is you just need to take a breath,
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_00: acknowledge that,
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_00: yeah,
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_00: it's frustrating to not book.
• 2:52
  but ultimately celebrate the fact that you've made a pretty big
• 2:56
  fan in the industry
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_00: in this casting director,
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_00: and you're certainly on a successful journey as a professional actor.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_00: Just a little callback there.
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_00: Where do you find actor friends?
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_00: I found mine in an improv community and acting classes.
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_00: If you're coming out of a college or conservatory program,
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_00: maybe see if there are alumni living in your market.
• 3:17
  SPEAKER_00: When I was first starting out,
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_00: Facebook wasn't public yet,
• 3:20
  but now there are all kinds of groups there and you can follow
• 3:25
  casting directors,
• 3:27
  SPEAKER_00: class studios,
• 3:28
  SPEAKER_00: and see what looks good to you.
• 3:30
  But seriously,
• 3:31
  get in a class,
• 3:32
  which is actually my next piece of advice.
• 3:34
  But you will have to wait for that because first we have to
• 3:38
  talk about this advice
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_00: that I have for you today,
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_00: right here,
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_00: right now,
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_00: which is about finding your actor friends.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, this is absolutely all still true.
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_00: Good actor friends are the best.
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_00: There is nothing like
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_00: a group of good actor friends who understand you,
• 3:59
  SPEAKER_00: who know what it's like,
• 4:01
  who you can commiserate with when things are not going so well
• 4:05
  and who you can
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_00: celebrate with when things are going really,
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_00: really well.
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_00: Actor friends are amazing.
• 4:11
  SPEAKER_00: And you need actor friends in your life.
• 4:13
  SPEAKER_00: And it's true,
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_00: you can still find these folks in classes,
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_00: workshops,
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_00: search the hashtag self-tape May.
• 4:23
  SPEAKER_00: Follow them on social media.
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_00: You can find them in film festivals, improv shows, sketch shows.
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_00: Get out in your community and just find them.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_00: They're out there.
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_00: They're waiting for you.
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_00: You need them and they need you.
• 4:36
  SPEAKER_00: So find your people.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_00: Because for humans in general,
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_00: having social support is a huge help in terms of handling stress,
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_00: which all humans deal with,
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_00: and actors are humans too,
• 4:50
  SPEAKER_00: newsflash.
• 4:51
  But actors also deal with a unique form of stress that only
• 4:57
  other actors really understand.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_00: So we're talking about stuff like rejection,
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_00: performance anxiety,
• 5:05
  last minute memorizing and audition prep when you're already
• 5:08
  exhausted from your
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_00: day job and other stuff you have going on in life,
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_00: battling traffic to get to that callback,
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_00: pressure from your family about like,
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_00: well,
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_00: when are you going to be on my TV next?
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_00: When are you going to make it?
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_00: What's going on?
• 5:21
  SPEAKER_00: The list is just endless, right?
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_00: If you know, you know.
• 5:25
  There's a lot of stress when it comes to being an actor and
• 5:28
  your actor friends are
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_00: gonna help you with that because having really strong social support,
• 5:35
  peers and colleagues who get you and understand the realities
• 5:40
  of being an actor is
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_00: really,
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_00: really important.
• 5:43
  SPEAKER_00: You want actor friends
• 5:45
  who understand the nuance of being pinned or on hold or on a
• 5:50
  veil,
• 5:51
  but then being released.
• 5:53
  And how much that both absolutely sucks and is such a great
• 6:00
  sign worth celebrating
• 6:02
  SPEAKER_00: that you are doing absolutely the right thing,
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_00: you're a fantastic actor,
• 6:07
  SPEAKER_00: but it still really sucks and it hurts like hell.
• 6:10
  SPEAKER_00: And nobody really gets that particular nuanced thing
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_00: yay, but both and better than your actor friends.
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_00: You want actor friends who are excited to read with you for self-tapes.
• 6:27
  Maybe even last minute or really late at night because that's
• 6:30
  the only time you
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_00: have to get that done.
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_00: And you want to like working with them and feel safe working with them.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_00: Feel like you can play when you work with them.
• 6:39
  Feel like you can put your best performance out there when you
• 6:42
  work with them.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_00: And most importantly,
• 6:47
  You want actor friends in your life who see you as a working
• 6:51
  actor and who can
• 6:53
  SPEAKER_00: continually affirm that identity for you.
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_00: Not because you're always on TV,
• 6:58
  SPEAKER_00: you're always in films,
• 7:00
  but because you are engaged in any number of various actor
• 7:05
  actions that are the
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_00: real work of being an actor.
• 7:09
  SPEAKER_00: So you're in classes, you're doing workshops,
• 7:13
  SPEAKER_00: You're auditioning.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_00: You're submitting yourself for films and TV things.
• 7:17
  SPEAKER_00: You're in the union.
• 7:18
  SPEAKER_00: You're working on getting in the union.
• 7:20
  SPEAKER_00: You have headshots and you keep them updated.
• 7:23
  SPEAKER_00: Same with your reel.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_00: You have materials and you're keeping them updated.
• 7:27
  SPEAKER_00: You're on casting sites.
• 7:29
  You're creating your own content and putting it out there for
• 7:31
  the world to see your work.
• 7:33
  SPEAKER_00: You're doing self-tape May.
• 7:36
  All the stuff that we do as actors that we as insiders of this
• 7:41
  occupation and
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_00: profession and career recognize as engaging in an acting career.
• 7:49
  Because it is so easy,
• 7:52
  so,
• 7:53
  so easy to let your mindset slip into outsider thinking.
• 8:00
  Oh,
• 8:00
  well,
• 8:00
  real actors are those people that we see on TV and in movies
• 8:04
  and at award shows.
• 8:06
  SPEAKER_00: And people who can pay all their bills from just their acting jobs.
• 8:10
  And everyone else is just sort of aspiring actors or wannabe
• 8:14
  actors trying to do
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_00: the actor thing.
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_00: Which, look, that's a mindset that you can choose to have.
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_00: That's a belief system that you can ascribe to.
• 8:29
  SPEAKER_00: but I do not recommend it at all.
• 8:34
  And so many of our loved ones or even just random people that
• 8:39
  you meet hold that
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_00: outsider view and they will unintentionally,
• 8:44
  SPEAKER_00: and let's face it,
• 8:45
  SPEAKER_00: sometimes intentionally,
• 8:47
  say things that will chip away at your actor identity and make
• 8:51
  you feel really bad
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_00: about yourself and bad about your career if you let them.
• 8:57
  And one of the best things that really good actor friends can
• 9:03
  do for each other is
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  to continually support and affirm each other in our
• 9:08
  occupational identity because
• 9:11
  SPEAKER_00: all of those outsiders never will and they have no idea how to anyway.
• 9:17
  Because they have on their outsider glasses and those glasses
• 9:20
  are really contagious
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_00: and they can really mess with an actor mindset.
• 9:29
  SPEAKER_00: And my dream,
• 9:32
  SPEAKER_00: my like absolute ideal world dream,
• 9:37
  aside from like we fix climate change and there's world peace
• 9:40
  and everybody's
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_00: happy.
• 9:43
  My dream for actors is that every single actor ditches those
• 9:49
  outsider glasses forever.
• 9:52
  SPEAKER_00: Puts on insider glasses forever.
• 9:55
  SPEAKER_00: So that we all see that what makes us actors,
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_00: working actors,
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_00: professional actors,
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_00: whatever term sort of lights you up the most,
• 10:07
  SPEAKER_00: it's the job aspects,
• 10:10
  SPEAKER_00: not the results aspects.
• 10:13
  SPEAKER_00: So it's auditions, it's not bookings.
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_00: It's classes, not red carpets.
• 10:19
  SPEAKER_00: It's passion and engagement, not, well, what have I seen you in lately?
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_00: It's journey, not destination.
• 10:31
  Just another little callback there to our previous letter to
• 10:34
  young actor Amy.
• 10:38
  SPEAKER_00: Because if we can all adopt this mindset,
• 10:41
  SPEAKER_00: this insider perspective,
• 10:43
  then all actors become so secure in their actor identity that
• 10:48
  there's literally
• 10:49
  SPEAKER_00: nothing that an outsider could say that would rattle us.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_00: Like nothing at all.
• 10:55
  SPEAKER_00: It would be like water off a duck's back.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, they don't get it.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_00: I don't care, moving on.
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_00: That's my dream.
• 11:03
  SPEAKER_00: I want this for us.
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_00: I really want this for us.
• 11:07
  SPEAKER_00: And in the meantime, I think we can do this one by one.
• 11:12
  SPEAKER_00: It'll start ripples out in a pond.
• 11:16
  So find your actor friends who will help you maintain this
• 11:19
  insider mindset
• 11:22
  Share this content with your actor friends who you see very
• 11:25
  easily sort of falling
• 11:26
  SPEAKER_00: into that outsider thinking.
• 11:30
  SPEAKER_00: But those friends are going to help you with that.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_00: And you can all support each other in that.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_00: Support each other in that insider, I'm an actor, thinking.
• 11:41
  SPEAKER_00: And if you want help strengthening this insider mindset,
• 11:45
  SPEAKER_00: that self-concept that says,
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_00: I'm a full-time working actor,
• 11:49
  SPEAKER_00: always.
• 11:51
  SPEAKER_00: Full stop.
• 11:51
  SPEAKER_00: End of sentence.
• 11:53
  SPEAKER_00: I want to help you.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_00: I offer a complimentary session.
• 11:57
  SPEAKER_00: I'm a mindset coach.
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_00: And I can coach you on it.
• 12:00
  And you can come and experience working with me for yourself
• 12:03
  for free for an hour.
• 12:05
  SPEAKER_00: And rest assured, this is not a sales call.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_00: I am not Alec Baldwin and Glengarry Glen Ross.
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_00: Not even close.
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_00: In my world, ABC means always be celebrating.
• 12:17
  So we're probably going to find stuff to celebrate about you
• 12:19
  and how awesome you are.
• 12:21
  This is a chance for us to chat and connect and for you to walk
• 12:26
  away with some
• 12:27
  specific actionable ideas that you can start applying right
• 12:32
  away to shift and
• 12:33
  SPEAKER_00: strengthen your actor mindset.
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_00: So go ahead and get yourself set up with that.
• 12:39
  SPEAKER_00: There are links...
• 12:41
  SPEAKER_00: everywhere that you might find links associated with this.
• 12:45
  SPEAKER_00: So in the Substack post,
• 12:47
  SPEAKER_00: in the show notes of the podcast,
• 12:49
  SPEAKER_00: in the YouTube video description,
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_00: you can always go to my website,
• 12:54
  SPEAKER_00: thealignedactor.com and find a way to connect with me there.
• 12:58
  SPEAKER_00: I think right now that is on my work with me page.
• 13:03
  And yeah,
• 13:04
  so you can get yourself set up with that and we'll have a lot
• 13:06
  of fun.
• 13:06
  SPEAKER_00: It'll be great.
• 13:07
  SPEAKER_00: So you should do that.
• 13:09
  And in the meantime,
• 13:10
  you can also get my pre-audition focusing meditation.
• 13:14
  I put this together to help you get out of your head and into
• 13:19
  your character so
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_00: that you can rock your next audition.
• 13:21
  SPEAKER_00: And it's completely free.
• 13:23
  And it's going to help you let go of your nerves if you're
• 13:26
  feeling nervous before an audition.
• 13:29
  SPEAKER_00: Or also any thoughts about like, what does casting want?
• 13:33
  SPEAKER_00: How can I book this role?
• 13:34
  SPEAKER_00: Please let me book this role.
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_00: You're going to let go of those.
• 13:38
  And you're going to focus in on what your character wants and
• 13:41
  what's happening in the scene.
• 13:43
  SPEAKER_00: And then that's going to help you stay present there,
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_00: stay connected to your reader and then present your best work.
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_00: So I want you to go pick that up.
• 13:52
  SPEAKER_00: Again,
• 13:53
  there are links everywhere that you would expect to find links
• 13:56
  and you can go get
• 13:58
  SPEAKER_00: that and that would be awesome.
• 14:00
  SPEAKER_00: And then another thing I want to tell you about,
• 14:01
  SPEAKER_00: if you're super stressed,
• 14:04
  SPEAKER_00: I have an ebook,
• 14:05
  a guide of super simple mindfulness life hacks that help me
• 14:09
  calm down quickly
• 14:10
  SPEAKER_00: whenever my stress is really high.
• 14:12
  SPEAKER_00: I was just talking about it today with a group.
• 14:14
  SPEAKER_00: It's called Accessing Calm.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_00: And these are the tools that help me release tension from my body.
• 14:20
  They help keep my mind from spinning out of control with
• 14:23
  frustration and worry.
• 14:24
  SPEAKER_00: And they help me get through a lot of different things in my life.
• 14:28
  So the tiny little micro things like getting through the
• 14:30
  morning rush with my kid,
• 14:33
  dealing with all the traffic on the way to school and cars
• 14:37
  going this way and that
• 14:38
  SPEAKER_00: way and that way and this way,
• 14:40
  SPEAKER_00: calming down before a big audition.
• 14:42
  And then just all of the stress that we won't even get into
• 14:47
  about the world at large.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_00: It's a quick read.
• 14:52
  SPEAKER_00: It has video demonstrations of all of the tools and techniques.
• 14:55
  And I'm probably going in very soon to add a couple more
• 14:59
  techniques because I'm
• 15:00
  SPEAKER_00: discovering,
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_00: oh,
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_00: these might be useful to add as well.
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_00: And I want you to have them.
• 15:04
  SPEAKER_00: So again, there's links everywhere.
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_00: You can go and pick that up for yourself and it's just $7.
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_00: So that's a really great price for
• 15:12
  All these tools that can help you calm down and stay grounded
• 15:16
  and present.
• 15:18
  SPEAKER_00: And then lastly, but not leastly, is that even a word?
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_00: I have some upcoming workshops at the SAG-AFTRA Los Angeles Conservatory.
• 15:30
  So now again,
• 15:30
  these are exclusively for members of the SAG-AFTRA Los Angeles
• 15:36
  Conservatory.
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_00: It's a couple of online workshops on mindfulness.
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_00: It's called Mindfulness 101.
• 15:42
  SPEAKER_00: empower your craft and your career with your presence.
• 15:45
  SPEAKER_00: So you can come learn about mindfulness and the many advantages it offers
• 15:49
  SPEAKER_00: performers,
• 15:50
  SPEAKER_00: experience a guided mindfulness meditation,
• 15:53
  SPEAKER_00: explore the benefits of developing a daily mindfulness practice,
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_00: and learn some quick centering tools to use in auditions and on set.
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_00: So if you're a member of the SAG-AFTRA Los Angeles Conservatory,
• 16:06
  SPEAKER_00: you can head to the calendar,
• 16:07
  SPEAKER_00: find it on their website.
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_00: I have links, again, everywhere associated with this content.
• 16:13
  SPEAKER_00: And you can sign up for that.
• 16:14
  SPEAKER_00: I have a workshop in October and one in November.
• 16:18
  SPEAKER_00: And if you can't find them, it's just because they're not released yet.
• 16:20
  I think they release them like two weeks in advance of whenever
• 16:24
  they're actually released.
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_00: scheduled for.
• 16:26
  SPEAKER_00: So keep an eye out for those.
• 16:29
  SPEAKER_00: And if you're not a member of the SAG-AFTRA Los Angeles Conservatory,
• 16:33
  I encourage you to join because it's $45 for a full year of a
• 16:38
  variety of different
• 16:40
  SPEAKER_00: classes and workshops.
• 16:42
  SPEAKER_00: There's stuff on producing your own content.
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_00: There's stuff on, there's like acting classy things.
• 16:51
  SPEAKER_00: There's, you know, I do mindfulness there.
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_00: I'm planning other workshops that I'm going to do there.
• 16:58
  SPEAKER_00: But there's just like a ton of different workshops for actors to continue
• 17:03
  SPEAKER_00: developing your career,
• 17:05
  SPEAKER_00: continue developing your craft.
• 17:07
  SPEAKER_00: And it's a really great experience.
• 17:09
  It's a really great opportunity that's for SAG-AFTRA members
• 17:12
  and then you also have
• 17:13
  SPEAKER_00: to join the conservatory.
• 17:15
  But they keep it low cost so that it's accessible to as many
• 17:19
  people as possible.
• 17:21
  SPEAKER_00: So that's what I have for you today.
• 17:22
  I hope you're having a wonderful day and I wish you all the
• 17:25
  best and I will see you next time.
• 17:28
  SPEAKER_00: Bye.