Latest / Hot Girl Energy Podcast / 51. friendships in your 20s & changing your mindset ft. @trinitytondeleir

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51. friendships in your 20s & changing your mindset ft. @trinitytondeleir · Hot Girl Energy Podcast

• 0:13
  Hello you guys, Welcome back to another episode of the Hawkgirl Energy Podcast.
• 0:18
  I'm your host, Kaylee, and this is your weekly reminder that it's a
• 0:20
  new day, a new week, a new mindset, and another day for
• 0:23
  you to become the Hawkgirl energy you want to attract. Hello you guys,
• 0:28
  Happy Tuesday. I am recording so much more in advance than I typically do.
• 0:34
  As you guys know, I typically record on Mondays, but today is
• 0:36
  Sunday. I am currently in Vancouver. If you guys don't follow me on
• 0:41
  Instagram, I have been here for the past week and I'm here visiting my
• 0:46
  best see trend and trend is here on the Hawkgirl Energy Podcast trend say Hello,
• 0:53
  Hello, Wait, wait, wait wait, I didn't realize that this
• 0:56
  is the first time we've recorded for yours. I know, I know.
• 0:59
  Wait, no, no, we have. We did the New York Fashion
• 1:03
  It still doesn't feel like it's the same because it was a totally different circumstance
• 1:07
  and that was like New York Fashion Week tea. It wasn't really like a
• 1:10
  conversation like the only time we've ever done an episode just her and I was
• 1:12
  for the Wellness Cafe. Yeah, because even listening to do the intro,
• 1:15
  I was like, this is so weird. Usually I feel like I'm introying
• 1:19
  and then we're just talking on my Yeah I know. And I also like
• 1:23
  it's weird because like trendon Land were like one of the two people that actually
• 1:26
  inspired me to start the podcast too, So even like just like setting up
• 1:30
  and like I don't know, I'm just like you literally taught me how to
• 1:33
  do this because we always say your ar mom, but now like seeing you
• 1:36
  you have your mic set up and you're like, okay, let's do this
• 1:38
  for recording this, and like I love it. Yeah yeah, so yeah,
• 1:42
  I feel so surreal. And also I've had the podcast for a year,
• 1:45
  which is so crazy, Like last week its like just yesterday and you
• 1:48
  were like maybe I should start my own and we're like, yes, you
• 1:49
  have to do it. We love the podcast so much. Yeah yeah,
• 1:53
  I got my mic, traveling with my mic, we're going to record,
• 1:56
  yeah, and it's just so fun. So yeah, So I'm in Vancouver.
• 2:00
  Trent and I have been the biggest tourist in her city, and I
• 2:04
  feel like it like Trent is like doing things that she never does here too,
• 2:07
  which is so fun because I don't know. In the beginning, I
• 2:10
  don't think we anticipated to have a whole like tourist week, but we've really
• 2:15
  been on vacation, Like we've been so much. I keep saying I'm on
• 2:17
  vacation. We went out on a Wednesday night. I'm like, this is
• 2:22
  insane, the fact that I'm out in my own city on a Wednesday night.
• 2:24
  I'm usually tucked in bed by nine o'clock with my PJS on, and
• 2:29
  if anyone asked me to do anything, I'm like, don't you know,
• 2:30
  I'm in bed. Yeah. And that is literally me like all the time,
• 2:34
  like during the week, like I never want to leave my house.
• 2:36
  I'm just like I'd like to just like cook at home, have a chill
• 2:38
  night. But we're like, this is summer. This is the last month
• 2:40
  of the summer, Like we need to get out, have fun, enjoy
• 2:44
  the last few weeks of just doing fun things. And we had so much
• 2:49
  fun this week, Like this is my last day here. I am traveling
• 2:51
  home tonight. But we just did all the fun things in Vancouver, Like
• 2:53
  we went to Stanley Park. We went biking there, which was like literally
• 2:57
  so fun. If you guys haven't done that, Like and if you guys
• 3:00
  live here, it was such a fun time, Like we got like a
• 3:02
  good workout and the sites are so beautiful and it's just like a fun activity
• 3:08
  and it just like made me realize, like I need to be a tourist
• 3:10
  in my own city. Like I keep saying, like I need to do
• 3:14
  fun things in Ottawa because there's definitely other things I can do besides the typical
• 3:17
  things that I do. But I feel like Trent was just you were so
• 3:21
  like in love with your city doing those things. I felt like it made
• 3:23
  you realize how much you love Vancouver. Yeah. And when I was biking
• 3:25
  behind you and I was looking at Kal's had this beautiful blue workout set on
• 3:30
  and it just fits so perfectly with the water, and we were just biking
• 3:35
  vibing, and I literally, like I said to you one time, I'm
• 3:38
  like, I'm like tearing up, Like I never realized how much I love
• 3:40
  the city, how beautiful it is. It's just funny because you can get
• 3:44
  so caught up in your routine that you forget to leave your house. And
• 3:46
  I was like, oh, I genuinely felt like I was on vacation this
• 3:51
  whole week. Yeah, so much fun. Yeah, we like tried new
• 3:53
  restaurants out, like just we literally did, like you, like everything that
• 3:57
  you would do on vacation. It was the best, best week. So
• 4:00
  yeah, I'm excited to have Trend come to my city and we do the
• 4:02
  same because I think that will make me fall in love with Ottawa more as
• 4:06
  well. So soon only what four weeks? Yeah, oh my god.
• 4:11
  Yeah. So my engagement party, as you guys know, is coming up,
• 4:14
  and Trent and Brodie are coming down for that weekend and yeah, it's
• 4:18
  going to be so fun. I'm also excited because Brody and Zach have never
• 4:20
  met each other. Even me, I was just yeah, say, and
• 4:25
  it feels weird because we always FaceTime and like I feel like, well I
• 4:29
  do feel like I know, it's so funny. You know, when we
• 4:30
  meet, it'll be like hey, hey, yeah you already met Yeah,
• 4:33
  like face time all that, like it just yeah, feels like they already
• 4:38
  know each other. And Brodie's always with us when we travel to Coachella and
• 4:41
  even La and even here, so it'll be like the missing piece of the
• 4:44
  puzzles to finally met Zach. Yeah. Yeah, so we're so so excited
• 4:47
  about the engagement party. It's coming so soon. And yeah, I just
• 4:51
  can't wait for Trend and Brody to be in Ottawa. It's so exciting.
• 4:55
  I've never been to Ottawa either. Yeah, oh my god, I forgot
• 4:58
  about that. Okay, so let's get into the questions because Trina and I
• 5:02
  can just chat about our whole week here. Literally is this whole entire episode.
• 5:06
  But we did a question box on our Instagram stories. Trend did one
• 5:12
  on hers, I did one on mine, and we're going to be answering
• 5:15
  all your questions and we're going to talk about to this question first, because
• 5:19
  I feel like there's a lot of new people either here on my podcast or
• 5:25
  from Trends podcasts, or even new followers that just you know, discovered that
• 5:29
  we both have our own podcasts. But some people want to know how we
• 5:32
  met. So the power of social media is kind of how we came together.
• 5:40
  Yeah, so I think this is how we met. So Trend posted
• 5:43
  a story two years ago. Was it two years ago? Probably two years
• 5:46
  ago, not last year, not this year, last year. Okay,
• 5:48
  So beginning of last year she posted a story and it was a private story.
• 5:53
  Trend and I already followed each other like I've actually been following trend for
• 5:55
  a while, Like I was like subscribe to her YouTube, like, which
• 5:59
  is so I know, so anyways, I would subscribe to her YouTube,
• 6:03
  so I knew who she was, and I think you followed me like recently
• 6:06
  within those few months. And then she made a private story saying like,
• 6:10
  is anyone going in New York crash and week? Like I kind of want
• 6:13
  to make an impulsive flight and just go, And I was like, I
• 6:17
  kind of want to do that. Like this was also kind of the period
• 6:20
  of time where covid was finally ending, and I was just like itching to
• 6:25
  get out of the city and do something fun. And also, just like
• 6:28
  meat fellow influencers, I'm like, I have no influencer friends. I'm here
• 6:31
  alone, like just not really you know, doing anything. I don't know.
• 6:35
  I just like I felt the need to meet someone who was in a
• 6:40
  similar career path as me. So I reached out to Trent and I was
• 6:43
  like, oh my god, I would totally be interested, like let me
• 6:45
  know if you want to book flights whatever. And then our friend Land also
• 6:48
  joined us as well. But that's kind of like how we met just so
• 6:51
  funny because we really had barely had any communication prior. Yeah, but all
• 6:58
  influencers have a close friends Instagram story when even if you haven't messaged them,
• 7:02
  it'll be like just like asking for brand recommendations or contacts, So even if
• 7:09
  you haven't talked, you put them on your close friends. And then she
• 7:12
  like, we hadn't really talked. No, Yeah, it's just like I
• 7:15
  totally be down and I'm like okay, like and like, I like I
• 7:18
  knew you based off like watching I was like, I feel like her vibe
• 7:21
  is a lot like mine. Like I feel like there's social media you can
• 7:24
  really tell if like friendships would work because you can kind of tell if like
• 7:28
  they have you know, a similar style, similar like passions. I don't
• 7:30
  know, so I knew like trend was obviously into like health and wellness,
• 7:34
  and like we were very similar to the content as well. And I'm like,
• 7:36
  I feel like we would vibe like I feel like we get it out
• 7:39
  of super well. And literally the first day we met, we were like,
• 7:44
  wait, why do we feel like we've known each other early years?
• 7:46
  Yeah, it was just instant little Lulu bestie click. Yeah, And we
• 7:50
  should have known by the fact that we were just like Okay, we've never
• 7:54
  talked, but let's just hop on the slight and get happen. Yeah,
• 7:56
  and then the rest is history. Yeah, literally history. And now it's
• 8:00
  like every time, like we reconnect on a vacation or whatever, because we
• 8:03
  travel a lot together, it just feels like like we've been together this entire
• 8:09
  day year for the entire time. Like it doesn't feel like we live in
• 8:11
  two different cities. So it's nice that we can just yeah, catch up
• 8:18
  a bit and just kind of catch up from where we were, like where
• 8:20
  we left off. So it's nice to have friendships like that. And yeah,
• 8:26
  just we still text like almost every day, well not every day,
• 8:30
  but every week, let's say every week. No, I was just about
• 8:33
  to say, it's nice to have a friend who understands just exactly what you're
• 8:37
  going through and is doing the exact same thing. So even if we haven't
• 8:39
  talked in a week, it's just like hey, hey, yeah, and
• 8:43
  we both know we're just busy doing our own things and we catch up when
• 8:46
  we can, but then when we see each other in person, it's like
• 8:48
  no time has passed. So those are the friendships that you have to cherish
• 8:52
  in life because those are special. Yeah, I also have no idea this
• 8:56
  like noise in the background is going to be hurt or not. But if
• 8:58
  you guys see your cars driving by, it's because we're a trans apartment.
• 9:01
  Obviously we'recording this episode. But this is also a sign that social media can
• 9:07
  bring good people in your life. It's amazing how much good and bad can
• 9:11
  come from social media. But I'm very grateful that you're able to build such
• 9:13
  amazing friendships through the power of social media. So if you're that type of
• 9:18
  person where you're having a hard time, you know, making new friends in
• 9:22
  a new city or anything like that, I highly, highly, highly recommend
• 9:24
  just messaging someone and just asking if they want to go for coffee. You
• 9:28
  know, I'm new in the city. I'd love to, you know,
• 9:31
  I feel like we'd get along whatever, Like just like send that message out
• 9:33
  because I feel like and I like it brought us so close together and like
• 9:37
  we're in our late well, I'm in my late twenties, transferner early twenties,
• 9:41
  but like sometimes people talk about how it's hard to meet people in your
• 9:45
  late twenties, but I really feel like if you just kind of reach out
• 9:48
  and make that connection, and I feel like some people may think when they
• 9:52
  hear this story that they can only do that if they also have a social
• 9:56
  media following, which is so untrue. Like we did. Oh yeah,
• 10:00
  we didn't even mention that we did. Kill's got to come to the one
• 10:03
  this cafe, that it is a good Why did we not bring that up
• 10:07
  at the beginning of the episode. I felt like a week that felt like
• 10:09
  a month ago because it was the beginning of this week. Yeah, okay,
• 10:11
  yeah, we did the first well this cafe meet up and kials got
• 10:15
  to be there, which was great because obviously we have some of the same
• 10:18
  community. But even the girls that were able to come out to that meetup,
• 10:22
  we're grabbing each other's instagrams because they knew that if they listened to our
• 10:26
  podcasts that they would have similar interests, and they were making friends, making
• 10:30
  plans to hang out again, go for hawk road walks, go for workout.
• 10:33
  So really, just throw yourself out there. You just have to be
• 10:37
  even just how we were. You have to be spontaneous, delusional and just
• 10:41
  shoot your shot. Yeah. No, it was so cute to actually see
• 10:43
  them get along so well and like, like you said, like getting each
• 10:46
  other's Instagram, their phone numbers, all that, and then us just like
• 10:50
  meeting you guys who are like, oh my god, I listened to both
• 10:52
  of your podcasts, Like it literally just feels like we're all best friends.
• 10:54
  Yeah, so much fun. But yeah, oh my god, I can't
• 10:56
  leave betually for about to bring that up. That does literally feel like a
• 10:58
  week ago. But yeah, it was a really really good event and it
• 11:01
  made Trend realize that, like she needs to do more things like that,
• 11:05
  and I'm like, I feel like I need to do that in Ottawa.
• 11:07
  I need to bring the community together with just creating more friendships and just bringing
• 11:13
  everyone together with similar interests. It's so so fun. So yeah, that's
• 11:16
  such high energy and positive, positive vibes, just the best feeling ever.
• 11:20
  Yes, so let's continue this topic about friendships and all that. So someone
• 11:26
  asked how to deal with toxic friends? How would you say you would deal
• 11:33
  with Honestly, as I got older, that is the one thing that I
• 11:37
  just slowly realized your time and your energy is so sacred and you only have
• 11:43
  a certain amount of time in the day and your life as you grow older,
• 11:48
  and you're busy to give to friends. So if someone is toxic.
• 11:50
  Honestly, I would first off have a discussion with them, but you just
• 11:56
  time is so sacred as you grow up, and you to prioritize that for
• 12:01
  people with positive energy, So don't feel like the biggest thing is obviously if
• 12:05
  you're having issues, communicate about it. But if you're communicating and the issues
• 12:09
  aren't being resolved, and if someone makes you feel bad, they shouldn't be
• 12:13
  in your life. Shouldn't be in your life. No, Like, there's
• 12:16
  just no reason you don't have to even if it's just like I feel like
• 12:18
  a lot of the times you have the friends in high school and then you
• 12:22
  think you still have to be friends with them just for the sake of carrying
• 12:26
  out that friendship because you've known each other growing up. But if someone makes
• 12:28
  you feel bad about yourself or puts you down, or even if you don't
• 12:33
  leave hanging out with them feeling better, like every single time you leave,
• 12:35
  it's like that was so much fun and I'm sad to see you go.
• 12:39
  Yes, But if you have a friend that you're not like, if you're
• 12:41
  not sad to leave them, and if you don't leave them feeling energized and
• 12:46
  happy and inspired and motivated. Why is that? Like, why is your
• 12:50
  friendship still a thing? Yeah? Like why that shouldn't even know? Like,
• 12:52
  you need to feel good about the friendship. That's friendships that you're in.
• 12:58
  And if you don't feel good after what you guys just did or hanging
• 13:01
  out, if they're bringing you down, if they're bringing your energy down,
• 13:03
  it's just you need to rethink that friendship completely, I think. And like,
• 13:07
  as trend said, like having a conversation is definitely the first step to
• 13:11
  dealing with a toxic friendship. But if they don't take that feedback that you've
• 13:16
  said to them about how you feel about the friendship, then it's not gonna
• 13:20
  work. It's just it's not worth your energy putting in towards that friendship because
• 13:24
  if you look at it as a relationship with your boyfriend, you're not going
• 13:26
  to put up with being treated like shit. And sometimes people view it differently
• 13:31
  with friendships and think that they have to put up with it just because they've
• 13:33
  known each other for so long. But if your boyfriend was treating you wrong,
• 13:37
  you would break up with them and lose contact. So we have to
• 13:41
  have the same mindset about toxic friends because your energy and your time is just
• 13:45
  so valuable and it should only be going towards people with positive vibes who make
• 13:48
  you feel good, and there are friendships out there that will make you feel
• 13:52
  good. Pcent. This makes me think of my like I when Trend brought
• 13:58
  up the high school situation and made me think of my situation where I was
• 14:01
  in a group of girls and I realized how toxic they were and they also
• 14:09
  didn't like who I was with, so they didn't like Zach. And if
• 14:13
  they're not going to like someone that I love and who I know want to
• 14:16
  start a life with, if they're bringing me down and saying yeah, no,
• 14:20
  like we don't want them a part of our group, it's like,
• 14:22
  then why do you want those people in your life? As we mentioned,
• 14:24
  And so it's making me realize, like, I'm in such a better spot
• 14:28
  now with the friendships that I've built now versus where I was in high school,
• 14:31
  and just I'm with people that make me feel good. I'm with people
• 14:35
  that are not bringing any negative energy into my relationship or into me specifically,
• 14:41
  and so yeah, sometimes there is going to be friendships like that, and
• 14:43
  that's just the reality. But I had a similar thing where I had toxic
• 14:48
  friends in high school. And also I feel the need to point out that
• 14:52
  I went through a period and I'm sure you did too, where it's like
• 14:54
  I have to you leave a toxic friendship or distance yourself from people who aren't
• 14:58
  making you feel good. I went through a good period of life where I
• 15:00
  didn't really have that many close friends, but I just knew that even that
• 15:03
  was better than having someone who didn't make me feel good about myself and that
• 15:07
  wasn't a positive friendship. So also, don't be scared to like put yourself
• 15:15
  in that situation where you're not going to have as many close friends, but
• 15:18
  honestly, that's better than having a toxic friendship. And that's for some that's
• 15:22
  just making room for more positive friendships because I went through that time period and
• 15:24
  now I have you and Alanta and all exactly girls who are positive friendships who
• 15:30
  have similar interests. So you will find your people, and don't be scared
• 15:33
  to leave a toxic friendship because you deserve better. Yeah, no, thousand
• 15:37
  percent. And that also brings me to that point in my life where I
• 15:39
  almost like had doubts. I was like, did I make the right decision
• 15:41
  leaving these friends, like I have no one now, you know, I
• 15:45
  don't have as many as friends as I used to and all that. But
• 15:46
  again, as like trend said that it's gonna be You're gonna go through a
• 15:50
  period of time where you know it is going to be difficult and you may
• 15:54
  have doubts, but know that better things are coming. Bet our friendships are
• 15:56
  coming. And sometimes the small groups are better than larger groups because those girls
• 16:02
  that you have now are going to be the ones that are going to stick
• 16:04
  with you for the rest of your life. I'm telling you that right now,
• 16:07
  Like those closer friends and there's the smaller groups are what you're going to
• 16:11
  have for the rest of your life. Like I still have the same close
• 16:15
  friends like that I've had for so long. Like one of my best best
• 16:19
  friends that I always talk about that you guys know, I've had for like
• 16:22
  over twenty years of friendship like that is literally like one of like out of
• 16:26
  them. I don't even know how many friends I've had since high school.
• 16:30
  So yeah, I know, I'm like, go, let you go watch
• 16:33
  the next one because I could probably keep talking. Yeah, we can keep
• 16:36
  going. Okay, this one again is about friendships. Tips for maintaining a
• 16:41
  long distance friendship, and we know how that feels because we are obviously long
• 16:47
  distance. Trent is not that close to me. It's a five hour flight,
• 16:52
  which is kind of far. I wish it was closer. And obviously
• 16:55
  everyone here's Canada, and I don't think they understand how big is because even
• 17:00
  though we're both Canadian, it still is coast to coast. Yeah. I
• 17:03
  feel like one big tip that I like, I see our friendship and why
• 17:07
  it works so well is that we never try and lose communication. We always
• 17:11
  try and find ways to communicate with each other, whether it's a random FaceTime
• 17:15
  call or just even a like a random check in like over text, just
• 17:18
  being like hey, how are you. I haven't chat with you in so
• 17:22
  long. That I feel like has been really really helpful and it's it's the
• 17:25
  best just to kind of catch up. I mind, personally, FaceTime is
• 17:29
  the best. I'm more a visual no, no, we actually both suck
• 17:34
  at texting, but I feel like we say like, hey, just checking
• 17:38
  in, and then it usually like results in a FaceTime call or voice memos
• 17:42
  or whatever, like we yeah, just randomly usually just bring that connection close.
• 17:48
  And I feel like that really helps us maintain are like even like just
• 17:53
  coming here, I haven't seen her technically in four months, but it literally
• 17:56
  felt like I saw her like maybe a few weeks ago, because we try
• 18:00
  and communicate so much. I also think it helps too, like I get
• 18:03
  to see trends life through social media obviously, because like we share so much,
• 18:07
  so I feel like I see what you post on social media, so
• 18:11
  I know, like what you're doing, and I just feel like I can
• 18:15
  just catch up with you, like, hey, I saw you went to
• 18:15
  the lake last week, Like how is that? You know what I mean?
• 18:18
  So I feel like social media also plays a factor, and like just
• 18:22
  knowing what your best sees are doing and keeping in touch with them and keeping
• 18:25
  within their lives, you know, And just I think, well, if
• 18:29
  you're in a situation where your friends aren't posting a lot on social media,
• 18:33
  I think also just on top of that, it is a mutual respect of
• 18:36
  knowing that you both are busy, and it's not like if someone isn't replying
• 18:40
  fast enough or if you haven't chatted in a few weeks, that doesn't mean
• 18:42
  that your friendship is fading away or that it's not a good friendship. Just
• 18:47
  realizing that everyone is busy, but if you both know that you want to
• 18:51
  maintain that friendship and if it's important to you, just not being too hard
• 18:55
  on one another and just doing your best because it doesn't any long distance relationship
• 18:59
  is huff and shitty and is not ideal. Like this whole week, I've
• 19:03
  been like, I just wish you lived here. This would be amazing.
• 19:06
  This could be our morning routine every day, going to work out, grabbing
• 19:08
  smoothies, but ultimately that's not our situation. And just cherishing the time that
• 19:15
  we do have together instead of focusing on being a part, just making the
• 19:18
  best of the time that you have together, prioritizing time spent together. And
• 19:23
  I think now like moving forward, Well, this will be the first time
• 19:26
  I'm going to Autua. So I was going to say, like just each
• 19:30
  taking turns, but yeah, making the effort, like knowing that your friend
• 19:34
  is making the effort to come see you, or like or if you're in
• 19:37
  that circumstance where you can't, also just like making the effort of like texting
• 19:40
  that person or like scheduling a facetip call or anything like that. It just
• 19:42
  shows that you guys are willing to work on your friendship. It's again bringing
• 19:47
  back like relationships and boyfriends, like if your boyfriend, if you have a
• 19:49
  long distance relationship, and if one person is not putting in the effort,
• 19:53
  like obviously it's going to start to fall apart or anything like that. So
• 19:56
  just making sure that there's mutual effort being provided in both parts of the friendship
• 20:03
  or relationship is just so so important. So yeah, I think those are
• 20:07
  the tips that we can recommend for that. Okay, the next question is
• 20:12
  how to reduce your screen time. In my last episode, I talked with
• 20:18
  you guys about my August goals and one of the goals was to reduce screen
• 20:22
  time. And when I came here, Trend was like, wait, that's
• 20:26
  something that I've been trying to work on all summer. And tips that I
• 20:32
  think we can provide is I kind of provided it in my last episode.
• 20:36
  But one thing for me is I've just been trying to put my phone on
• 20:40
  do not disturb, and I also try and like put it in areas where
• 20:44
  I'm not going to gravitate towards it. But I'm also just trying to do
• 20:47
  fun things to keep myself busy that I don't need to like gravitate my phone
• 20:49
  towards all the time. I mean, I know tre trends and her reading
• 20:55
  era, yes, and she has been reading while I'm here, so good
• 21:02
  for her. She's like, I hope you're okay, but I'm going to
• 21:03
  read for like the next hour. Like of course, I'm like, maybe
• 21:07
  I need to start reading. Like honestly, I really feel like I do.
• 21:11
  Yeah, And that's something I've been trying to get back into for so
• 21:14
  long. But I was so attached to my phone that I felt I wasn't
• 21:17
  prioritizing reading. And I know, I just made it this huge episode on
• 21:21
  my podcast about reducing your screen time, and I was just talking about how
• 21:26
  I think during quarantine, I said, I think it became so habitual to
• 21:30
  us during quarantine because that's obviously all we had left that when life went back
• 21:34
  to usual, we weren't really prepared to adjust back to go back to our
• 21:40
  screen time before. And lately I've just been working on shutting my phone off
• 21:44
  and realizing that I want to make memories in the real time. So many
• 21:48
  times Brodie and I will, like I said, this week, it's felt
• 21:51
  like I'm on vacation because there's so many ideas and places I've brought Kayleie to
• 21:53
  this week that I've been meaning to put time into, and I feel like
• 21:56
  I honestly probably haven't, just being totally honest, because I've been sitting on
• 22:00
  my phone instead. Yeah, just like getting outside of your house. One
• 22:04
  thing that really helps, I find is if you're so addicted to just picking
• 22:08
  up your phone and looking at every notification, is putting your phone in a
• 22:11
  separate room. Yeah, yes, I've mentioned that too, just like leaving
• 22:17
  it in your bedroom and just doing what you have to get done. And
• 22:18
  that's also good. I said, like, if you want to be more
• 22:21
  productive, if you want to like actually get shit done, it's nice to
• 22:25
  be able to just not have that distraction and feel the urge because like obviously
• 22:29
  if it's in the room, you're going to have that urge, like you
• 22:30
  said, to check notifications and all that. And even when it comes to
• 22:33
  comparing yourself on social media. This this was last month, and it was
• 22:37
  when I was already working on less screen time, but I found myself scrolling
• 22:41
  one night and I was kind of getting just like in my fields, as
• 22:44
  you do on social media sometime. Obviously, so easy to fall into that
• 22:48
  comparison loop. And then I thought to myself, I said, I don't
• 22:52
  have to be looking at this right now. What am I like? This
• 22:55
  is I'm looking at something on a phone that's making me feel shitty. So
• 22:57
  you know what I did. I turn off my phone. I put it
• 23:00
  in the cupboard. I was in the county. I was a little dramatic.
• 23:03
  I put my laptop in the cupboard. I put my watch in the
• 23:07
  cupboard, and I was like, just focus on you, and what can
• 23:10
  you do right now to feel better. I literally watered my plants, I
• 23:14
  cleaned up my host I read a book and I had forgotten about it within
• 23:17
  five minutes, Whereas if I kept scrolling, I probably would have kept comparing
• 23:19
  and kept getting getting worse and worse. But I just thought to myself,
• 23:22
  like, you don't have to look at this. This isn't even real life.
• 23:26
  This is something online. Go put it away, focus on yourself in
• 23:30
  real life. Do something that will make you feel good. Yeah, And
• 23:33
  it just feels so good. So that's really something I've been prioritizing, is
• 23:36
  less screen time, and it makes your mental health ten times better, yeah,
• 23:40
  thousand percent. And I just feel like no screen time has just made
• 23:44
  me realize how much I enjoy like the smallest moments, like as you said,
• 23:48
  like even like going out to dinner this week, and just like prioritizing
• 23:52
  like you and I time, and like even like going on like just like
• 23:56
  dates with Zach, like going to get ice cream, like just like trying
• 23:57
  to keep myself busy has just made me realize like how I don't need to
• 24:02
  be on my phone all the time. And obviously it's extremely hard for us
• 24:04
  because it's our job. We need to be on our phone. Obviously,
• 24:07
  Like I feel this urge where it's like I need to be scrolling because I
• 24:11
  need to be keeping up with the trends, I need to be keeping up
• 24:14
  to date all that. But I don't need to be doing that for eight
• 24:15
  hours a day. Like I can spend like twenty minutes doing that, thirty
• 24:19
  minutes doing that, knowing what's going on in the world, and then actually
• 24:23
  like prioritize things that I need to get done throughout the day. Yeah.
• 24:26
  So I know, I feel like I took it. I took it a
• 24:29
  little too far, because I'm like, I don't even know what's trending anymore.
• 24:32
  I don't know any trends that are going on, and we were like,
• 24:34
  okay, maybe I should start scroll making an effort to scroll TikTok.
• 24:38
  But you've also been like I feel like you have been so like me seeing
• 24:42
  you. I feel like you've been feeling so good lately, Like I feel
• 24:45
  like like you're glowing like from like the last time I saw you, because
• 24:51
  I honestly feel like you being a little disconnected from social media has been like
• 24:55
  the best thing for you, you know, and just practicing so sometimes like
• 24:59
  having that little break two, it's like it's okay to take a break and
• 25:02
  you know, get back into it when you're ready, you know, because
• 25:06
  people go through that, people take breaks from jobs sometimes, you know,
• 25:10
  and it's almost like you just get you feel reinspired to do different things right.
• 25:14
  Also prioritizing journaling because we are about how good it is. But I've
• 25:18
  really been making a point and being strict to myself to do it every morning,
• 25:22
  gratitude, positive affirmations, and it's just crazy how much it can really
• 25:26
  affect your mindset. Because I say it's one of my top habits and my
• 25:30
  favorite things. But let's be honest, am I doing it every morning all
• 25:33
  the time. No, but it's crazy how much I actually notice the shift
• 25:37
  in my mind when I do make myself do it every morning, even if
• 25:41
  I don't feel like it, even if I don't wake up early enough.
• 25:44
  It's like, okay, you have five minutes to write down. It's literally
• 25:47
  five minutes. And it's crazy once you really just stick to it, even
• 25:49
  one or two weeks, just how much of a shift you notice in your
• 25:52
  mindset and positivity. And it's so beneficial. Yeah. I also mentioned that
• 25:57
  as one of my August goals because I felt like I was using summer as
• 26:02
  an excuse to not really be doing it when, as you said, it
• 26:06
  takes five to ten minutes of your morning to reflect and everything. And that
• 26:11
  was my goal for August. And I'm excited to see me actually being consistent
• 26:15
  throughout this entire month and get back into that good feeling and just you know,
• 26:18
  like it really is just the smallest little task that can make such a
• 26:22
  big difference in your mindset and everything. It's for a while, I wasn't
• 26:25
  strict with it either, because it's okay, I've been doing this for a
• 26:27
  while, you know exactly. It's kind of getting repetitive and whatever, but
• 26:32
  it makes you realize then I'm to get back into it again. You're like,
• 26:34
  oh wow, like this is why I fell in love with this in
• 26:37
  the first place. It really makes such a big difference. Yeah, a
• 26:40
  thousand percent yours. As I'm like, oh my god, how long have
• 26:42
  you been talking for? I'm thinking the episodes at like forty eight minutes,
• 26:45
  and I'm like, oh, just kidding, it's literally it twenty eight minutes.
• 26:48
  It probably could have been it like we could have dragged on each answer
• 26:52
  for so long. We can talk forever. Yeah, I think I'll do
• 26:55
  one more question before we end this episode off. But I'm going to do
• 27:00
  was the best advice you have ever received? And like you can say your
• 27:04
  answer and then I'll say mine. I think for me personally, is like
• 27:10
  one thing that my parents always told me is to never give up on anything.
• 27:17
  And like, even like thinking of like my career right now, I
• 27:22
  felt like this was something I could never do, Like it was just something
• 27:26
  that like I thought was a dream where I was like, oh, like
• 27:30
  that's never gonna happen, Like that's so unrealistic. I feel like you need
• 27:34
  to have that positive mindset, that positive energy to actually like never give up
• 27:41
  on something. And so for me, like just thinking of an example is
• 27:44
  I'm just thinking of my career right now because it's coming to the top of
• 27:47
  my head. But that was something that my parents were like, don't give
• 27:49
  up on this, like keep doing it, just keep posting, do what
• 27:52
  you are passionate about. And I think that's one thing I've learned as the
• 27:56
  best advice for me is to never give up on anything. When it comes
• 28:00
  to following your dreams. Yeah, it's all about It's so important because even
• 28:03
  if the one that's cafe meet up those girls, we're asking us for YouTube
• 28:06
  and podcast advice, and we just said, don't give up. Just don't
• 28:10
  give up. If there's no plan B, if there's no backup option,
• 28:12
  you will get there one step at a time. It maybe slow progress,
• 28:15
  but just don't give up. And it's like, when you think about it,
• 28:18
  why would you give up on something you're so passionate about? Exactly like
• 28:22
  it was. It was so like nice for them to also ask like for
• 28:25
  advice and all that because we were in that situation where it's like we really
• 28:27
  wanted to follow those dreams and we really wanted to like be where we are
• 28:32
  now, and it's just so important to have those people in your life that
• 28:34
  are giving you the best like motivation to keep going and keep just chasing your
• 28:41
  dreams and know that like, yeah, it's gonna be hard in the beginning,
• 28:44
  and you're gonna feel like you know it's not going to happen and all
• 28:47
  that, but you just need to have that positive mindset and just keep pushing
• 28:51
  through it, and I promise you the good will come out of it.
• 28:53
  So that's probably the best advice I've ever again, is just to never give
• 28:56
  up on anything, because I truly believe that you can do anything in life
• 29:00
  that you set your mind too. And I think, yeah, I think
• 29:03
  you guys can do it. So I'm like I can keep going for I'm
• 29:07
  all so much motivation right now, I'm be like a motivational speaker. But
• 29:11
  anyways, I just truly feel like that's like, honestly the best advice I've
• 29:14
  ever been given from like my dad, specifically because my dad is a business
• 29:18
  owner and he's just always inspired me too. Yeah, I just never give
• 29:22
  up. So that's probably my best advice. That's probably mine's along the exact
• 29:26
  same terms, but something my mom instilled in me, Like the earliest memory
• 29:30
  I have is she always just told me you can do anything you want.
• 29:33
  You can do anything you want. And that's why on the one that's cafe,
• 29:37
  I always say you can do anything you want because there's so many people
• 29:41
  who will have a scarcity mindset and you tell them your goals and they laugh
• 29:45
  at you or think that you can't do it. But if you truly believe
• 29:48
  you can do anything you want, like hearing my mom tell me that is
• 29:52
  probably what gave me the motivation to just dream big and be delusional. And
• 29:56
  we always say the being delusional like it never go is wrong. No dream
• 30:00
  is too big when you believe you can do it. So the best piece
• 30:03
  of advice that I had that got me to where I am today and that
• 30:07
  I have for you is that you can do anything you want. And doing
• 30:12
  something small, one small thing every day that will get you closer to your
• 30:17
  goals is the best way to look at it. Yea, Because you can
• 30:19
  look at this big dream and you can look at it and think it's so
• 30:22
  far away and that that's not realistic. How do you get from point A
• 30:26
  to point B? But you get there through one small step every single day
• 30:30
  until you suddenly look back and you go, holy shit, like, look
• 30:33
  at how much has changed, Look at where I am. This is why
• 30:36
  we have vision boards, the reasons you talk. And I'm looking at my
• 30:41
  vision board here on my computer and I'm just like, this is literally the
• 30:44
  reason why we have these vision boards. Because half this stuff on my vision
• 30:48
  board I've honestly already completed for the year, and there are things that I'm
• 30:52
  like, I never thought that these would actually be achieved. But you can
• 30:56
  do it. To everyone listening, you can do it. There's no goal
• 30:59
  to do whatever you're passionate about and just go for it, because you can
• 31:03
  make it happen if you set your mind to it. You both of us
• 31:07
  you Yeah, anything you want, if you don't give up, Yeah,
• 31:11
  make it happen. It's just it really is the truth. There's no magic
• 31:15
  secret in my there's nothing, no thousand percent, there's no magic potion or
• 31:19
  anything that. No, it's just amble as having a dream and not giving
• 31:25
  up and just having that mindset of just like wanting to do it. You
• 31:29
  know, just have to have that mindset that you can conquer the world,
• 31:32
  and you will be able to if you carry yourself with that, and don't
• 31:36
  be your own worst enemy and tell yourself negative thoughts that you can't do it,
• 31:40
  because it can be easy when you tell your goals to someone and they're
• 31:42
  like, they laugh it off. First, thou undercent thousand percent, But
• 31:47
  it could be easy to listen to that and be like, oh, yeah,
• 31:48
  maybe they're right, but no, never believe someone who tells you that.
• 31:52
  I'm feeling so motivated after listening to this episode right now, like I'm
• 31:55
  like, Okay, I gotta go. I'm gotta go start a business plan,
• 31:57
  Like I'm feeling so good just after chatting with this podcast episode right now.
• 32:01
  But I think we're going to end it off here because we're going to
• 32:05
  be recording some questions on Trends podcast. If you guys don't listen to our
• 32:09
  podcast, which I'm probably certain you already do, it is the Wellness Cafe,
• 32:15
  so definitely make sure to check it out. We're going to be answering
• 32:17
  a bunch of questions on hers. But thank you guys so so much for
• 32:21
  listening to another episode. I appreciate you all so so much. I love
• 32:24
  you all so so much. If you guys are new, definitely make sure
• 32:28
  to check out at the Hawk Grow Energy Podcast Instagram page. You can also
• 32:31
  follow the host our host, the host me Kaylee. All my social medias
• 32:37
  are linked in the description. But thank you guys so much for listening to
• 32:39
  another episode. I love you all and I will see you guys next week