Latest / Do You F*cking Mind? / 2025 Rebrand & Glow Up Day 4: The self confidence boost you need

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2025 Rebrand & Glow Up Day 4: The self confidence boost you need · Do You F*cking Mind?

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  Speaker 1: Hello beautiful people, Hello my beautiful beans, and welcome to
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  Speaker 1: day four of your twenty twenty five life reset. So
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  Speaker 1: if you've already listened to the last three, you'll know
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  Speaker 1: that this is ten days of short and sweet episodes
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  Speaker 1: to really get you on the right track to level
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  Speaker 1: up to be living the life that you want to
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  Speaker 1: be living this year and ideally beyond this year. Also,
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  Speaker 1: this is probably something that you can also use throughout
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  Speaker 1: the year as well.
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  Speaker 2: It doesn't have to be in January. If it gets
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  Speaker 2: to March and you're like, you know what, I need
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  Speaker 2: that ten day reset again, or that two week reset.
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  Speaker 2: If you've taken the weekend off, I'm going to revisit
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  Speaker 2: these chapters, then go ahead and do that. But today
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  Speaker 2: we are talking about giving yourself a confidence boost, because
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  Speaker 2: we all need it sometimes and even the most confident
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  Speaker 2: people need confidence boost, and some people kind of subconsciously
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  Speaker 2: have ways to help increase their confidence when they're feeling
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  Speaker 2: a little bit, you know, not that great about themselves,
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  Speaker 2: are a bit flat, or they're you know, like it
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  Speaker 2: feels like things are weighing down on them and they
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  Speaker 2: don't feel as excited or as like sure of themselves.
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  Speaker 2: In you know, whether it's work or in relationships or
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  Speaker 2: in you know, their relationship with themselves.
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  Speaker 3: But other people, like.
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  Speaker 2: Most people, I would imagine, really need some tools to
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  Speaker 2: help them like kind of snap back into this like
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  Speaker 2: good energy that we're feeling. Because I think we can
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  Speaker 2: all agree that when we are feeling confident within ourselves,
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  Speaker 2: within our work, within how we you know, externally and
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  Speaker 2: internally liking ourselves, how much we like ourselves, it really
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  Speaker 2: changes how we interact with the world. When I like myself,
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  Speaker 2: I interact in a much bolder, more proactive, outgoing way.
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  Speaker 2: And this can apply to intra extroverts. It doesn't matter.
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  Speaker 2: It doesn't mean that you have to be super social.
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  Speaker 2: But when you feel good within yourself, how you behave
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  Speaker 2: and how you interact with others and tasks and your
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  Speaker 2: work changes. Okay, so we're going to be talking about
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  Speaker 2: how like some quick ways that you can really boost
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  Speaker 2: your confidence. So the first one, while it might seem superficial,
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  Speaker 2: is dress the part. And what I mean by dress
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  Speaker 2: the part is so often we will use the nice candle,
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  Speaker 2: the nice outfit, the good makeup, the nice lipstick, the
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  Speaker 2: good shoes, the best perfume for other people for when
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  Speaker 2: we're going on like it's a special night out, it's
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  Speaker 2: a really and when we do use it, we're like,
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  Speaker 2: oh my god, this feels so amazing.
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  Speaker 3: I feel so elevated. Everything feels so great.
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  Speaker 2: So I'm not saying go and waste all the really
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  Speaker 2: expensive stuff every day, but how can you bring some
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  Speaker 2: of that or a significant portion.
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  Speaker 3: Of that into your everyday life. One thing that I
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  Speaker 3: started doing, and.
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  Speaker 2: I'll be the first to admit I don't do it
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  Speaker 2: every day, but one thing that I said to myself
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  Speaker 2: is this year, I want to rock up to my office,
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  Speaker 2: even if I'm working alone that day, and put effort
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  Speaker 2: into how I look, imagining that I'm going to whether
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  Speaker 2: I'm being interviewed or I'm going somewhere I'm interacting with
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  Speaker 2: people that I really respect. Okay, So instead of just
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  Speaker 2: throwing on active where every single day, which is something
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  Speaker 2: I wear, you know, so fucking often, I'm going to
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  Speaker 2: start changing how I dress and I'm going to see
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  Speaker 2: if it changes my performance in that day.
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  Speaker 3: And if the.
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  Speaker 2: Day is that I dress up, put effort into my appearance.
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  Speaker 3: Really like the outfit that I'm wearing. I'm really loving
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  Speaker 3: my shoes I.
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  Speaker 2: Put a bit more effort into my hand, how I
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  Speaker 2: style it, put some earrings on. I perform better that day.
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  Speaker 3: I just perform better.
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  Speaker 2: It's almost like I'm saying, you know what, I can
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  Speaker 2: dress up for me and it makes me feel so good.
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  Speaker 2: I'm going to put that perfume on, and it's just
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  Speaker 2: me in the office alone, and who's.
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  Speaker 3: Smelling the perfume me?
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  Speaker 2: I can smell it on myself and I really enjoy it.
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  Speaker 2: So it's these tiny little things. But when you dress
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  Speaker 2: the part, when you light that candle because you deserve
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  Speaker 2: to smell that candle, When you tidy up the space
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  Speaker 2: so it's perfect, not just because guests are coming over,
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  Speaker 2: but because you want to be in a really nice, tidy,
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  Speaker 2: beautiful space.
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  Speaker 3: When you buy yourself the fucking flowers.
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  Speaker 2: In your home so you can appreciate the flowers, your
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  Speaker 2: confidence goes up. It is a tiny little thing that
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  Speaker 2: you can do for yourself. And if you can't be
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  Speaker 2: affording candles and flowers, then work with what you've got
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  Speaker 2: at home, where the nice stuff, where you know, do
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  Speaker 2: those nice things for you. I can guarantee you your
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  Speaker 2: mood is already going to begin to shift. So that
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  Speaker 2: is the first one, so dress the part comes in
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  Speaker 2: the way of you know, the tidy space. How do
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  Speaker 2: you beautify your space for you?
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  Speaker 3: Okay?
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  Speaker 2: I for me, it can transform within the matter of
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  Speaker 2: half an hour.
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  Speaker 3: I can transform my.
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  Speaker 2: Mood very quickly by really dressing the part.
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  Speaker 3: Okay. So that's the first one.
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  Speaker 2: The second one is I want you to mentally prep
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  Speaker 2: yourself before you interact with other people. So many of
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  Speaker 2: us have as a default, and we don't even it's
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  Speaker 2: very subconscious programming, but we have this thing that my
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  Speaker 2: main aim is for people to like me, or for
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  Speaker 2: people to want to get along with me, or for
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  Speaker 2: this conversation to go really seamlessly with no issues at all.
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  Speaker 2: But the issue with that is that that can carve
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  Speaker 2: away at your confidence. If your main goal is for
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  Speaker 2: somebody to like you, then you're going to gear how
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  Speaker 2: you interact to them in a way that must please them.
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  Speaker 2: You're trying to mind read, you're trying to figure out
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  Speaker 2: what it is that they're going to want to get
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  Speaker 2: from you, or see from you, or hear from you,
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  Speaker 2: and you're preoccupied with that that you're not putting yourself first. Instead,
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  Speaker 2: You've got to look at it. World Number one You've
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  Speaker 2: got to look at it both ways. You've got to say,
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  Speaker 2: I want to make sure that I like this person too.
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  Speaker 2: What kind of questions can I be asking to ensure
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  Speaker 2: that I get something good out of this interaction? But
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  Speaker 2: you also want to say to yourself, instead of getting
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  Speaker 2: this person to like me, I want to get this
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  Speaker 2: person to know me. They're two very different things, but
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  Speaker 2: the way you approach it can still be very respectful,
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  Speaker 2: can still be very polite, but you approach it in
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  Speaker 2: a completely different way. If I'm trying to get someone
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  Speaker 2: to like me, I don't necessarily have to be myself.
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  Speaker 2: I just have to be a likable figure. And a
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  Speaker 2: lot of that requires me to think, oh, they're not
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  Speaker 2: going to like that aspect about me or that aspect,
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  Speaker 2: so I'm going to suppress it, shove it down. And
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  Speaker 2: that is one of the sure ways to start having
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  Speaker 2: lower self esteem, because you're saying how I present myself
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  Speaker 2: in general probably isn't good enough where it's not going
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  Speaker 2: to be accepted. I don't think it's going to be,
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  Speaker 2: so I now have to act a certain way in
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  Speaker 2: order to be accepted. Instead, you're going to say, I
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  Speaker 2: want to get this person to know me because I
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  Speaker 2: save so much time, I save so much fucking energy,
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  Speaker 2: and I'm myself the whole time. I can still be polite,
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  Speaker 2: I can still be respectful, but I'm standing in my energy,
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  Speaker 2: speaking my.
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  Speaker 3: Thoughts within reason.
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  Speaker 2: I don't have to be telling everyone my opinion all
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  Speaker 2: the time, but if it comes up in conversation, I'm
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  Speaker 2: just not going to agree just to be liked. I'm
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  Speaker 2: not going to pretend to like a joke when I
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  Speaker 2: don't think it's the funnest thing. I'm not going to
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  Speaker 2: pretend to like a certain thing just so we are
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  Speaker 2: more similar. I'm not going to because then we start
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  Speaker 2: getting really nervous, we're not ourselves and it just doesn't
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  Speaker 2: come across. So every time you're going to interact with someone,
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  Speaker 2: whether it's someone you've got to crush on, whether it's
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  Speaker 2: a stranger, whether it's your colleagues, your friends, your family,
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  Speaker 2: I don't who whether you know them super well or
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  Speaker 2: you think you know them well or you don't, You're
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  Speaker 2: gonna say my aim today is to get people to
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  Speaker 2: know me. And if they don't like me for who
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  Speaker 2: I am, then that is fair enough because they're getting
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  Speaker 2: to know the real me and that's okay that they
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  Speaker 2: don't like me as long as they don't like the
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  Speaker 2: real version of me, because there's nothing worse than trying
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  Speaker 2: to get someone to like you.
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  Speaker 3: You're putting on this weird.
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  Speaker 2: Fucking energy, this weird facade. Then they don't really like
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  Speaker 2: you because they're like, you're trying too hard. It's a
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  Speaker 2: bit off an intense energy. And then you think, well,
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  Speaker 2: they never got to see the real me. I'd rather
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  Speaker 2: someone see the real me and be able to make
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  Speaker 2: a true judgment call, because then I'm like, well I
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  Speaker 2: left there was nothing left on the table. I gave
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  Speaker 2: it everything, all right. So I want you to prep
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  Speaker 2: yourself of that every time you're going to interact with people. Now,
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  Speaker 2: the last thing that I want you to do is
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  Speaker 2: create your own kind of positive affirmation or mantra or
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  Speaker 2: daily statement in the morning. Okay, this is before you
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  Speaker 2: leave the house, and it's going to be something that
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  Speaker 2: makes you feel good.
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  Speaker 3: Okay.
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  Speaker 2: So a daily statement has to feel believable, it has
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  Speaker 2: to trigger a feeling, and it has to be for
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  Speaker 2: the positive.
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  Speaker 3: Okay.
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  Speaker 2: So what I mean by it has to trigger a
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  Speaker 2: feeling is you can say any statement under the sun,
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  Speaker 2: a thousand times. But unless you feel it, unless that
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  Speaker 2: statement becomes an emotion, it's not going to have much weight,
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  Speaker 2: and it's not going to carry that far as far
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  Speaker 2: as changing your mood, changing your energy. So you've got
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  Speaker 2: to start to think, what's a statement that resonates with me,
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  Speaker 2: that makes me feel good? And if you're someone that's like, well,
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  Speaker 2: I don't want to be making these crazy statements that
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  Speaker 2: I don't feel a realistic for me. Yet, you don't
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  Speaker 2: have to do that. You can literally make the statement
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  Speaker 2: like I've got so many I've got so many. One
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  Speaker 2: of them is I live for this feeling every time
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  Speaker 2: I come up across a challenge. I love coming out
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  Speaker 2: of the other end of that challenge knowing that I
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  Speaker 2: got through it somehow. So I say, I live for
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  Speaker 2: this feeling when I'm in my last KF, my run,
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  Speaker 2: I live for this feeling of feeling how I breathe
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  Speaker 2: and the heavy breathing, and you know it's a privilege
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  Speaker 2: that I can do this I live for. So then
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  Speaker 2: it starts to change how you approach situations. You could
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  Speaker 2: have another one that says today is a great day.
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  Speaker 2: I'm going to find great things in today, whether they're
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  Speaker 2: big or small. It's a great fucking day. You're priming
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  Speaker 2: yourself to look for great moments, great things, great everything.
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  Speaker 2: So you just like Prime Live and I my best
• 10:24
  Speaker 2: friend Live if you've heard her on the podcast, we're
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  Speaker 2: sometimes we literally call each other, well, like, good morning,
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  Speaker 2: today's a great day, Today's a great fucking day.
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  Speaker 3: It's a great fucking day. Today, it's going to be
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  Speaker 3: a great fucking day. And we just jee each other.
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  Speaker 2: Up, laughing, and then you know what, we feel so
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  Speaker 2: great after it. Okay, another one is and I recently
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  Speaker 2: spoke about this. Another one could be isn't it so
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  Speaker 2: good that? And you feel in the sentence, and then
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  Speaker 2: it primes you to look at all the things that
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  Speaker 2: are really good.
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  Speaker 3: You have to snap out of this habitual. What was that?
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  Speaker 2: I was just talking about it? Literally, I think yesterday.
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  Speaker 2: Your default mode network, this habitual way of thinking when
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  Speaker 2: you're on an autopilot. If you don't like where your
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  Speaker 2: autopilot is set at, you can change it.
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  Speaker 3: And the best way to change it is through priming.
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  Speaker 2: Priming yourself through statements, priming yourself through emotions, physical actions, activities,
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  Speaker 2: and habits.
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  Speaker 3: Okay, and feelings.
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  Speaker 2: So these statements are a really good way of shifting
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  Speaker 2: where your default mode network is at any given time.
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  Speaker 2: You need to snap out of the habit of your
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  Speaker 2: old self and start leaning into a new default mode
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  Speaker 2: network where you're more primed to look for the good,
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  Speaker 2: to action the good, to put yourself out there in
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  Speaker 2: a different way and in a better way. Now, if
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  Speaker 2: you do these three things at the cell all together
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  Speaker 2: every day, you will notice a shift in your confidence.
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  Speaker 2: It might be a little bit, it might be massive.
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  Speaker 2: Some days it's going to impact you more than others,
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  Speaker 2: but you will notice an effect.
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  Speaker 3: So you want to be dressing the part.
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  Speaker 2: You want to be priming yourself with interactions with people,
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  Speaker 2: especially if you're a peace please are, especially if you're
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  Speaker 2: quite you're lacking confidence in general. You want to make
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  Speaker 2: sure that this person gets to Your aim is I
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  Speaker 2: want this person to get to know me, not necessarily to.
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  Speaker 3: Have to like me.
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  Speaker 2: And then the last one is you want to engage
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  Speaker 2: in your positive statement, your affirmation or a mantra that
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  Speaker 2: makes you feel good and makes you want to approach
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  Speaker 2: the day in a really great, excited, positive way, and
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  Speaker 2: then that's gonna increase your confidence.
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  Speaker 3: That is all for today. I hope you enjoyed that episode.
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  Speaker 3: Love you guys so much.
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  Speaker 2: Stay tuned for tomorrow, which is Day five, and tomorrow
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  Speaker 2: we're going to be talking about how to calm your
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  Speaker 2: mind like a legend.
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  Speaker 3: Love you guys so much.
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  Speaker 2: As always, remember, be kind to yourself, be kind to
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  Speaker 2: your brain, don't text it from anyone, and especially don't
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  Speaker 2: text it from yourself.
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  Speaker 3: Don't care