Latest / Hurdle with Emily Abbate / #HURDLEMOMENT: Why Time Is More Valuable Than Money (& How To Treat It That Way) With Les Alfred

Transcript

#HURDLEMOMENT: Why Time Is More Valuable Than Money (& How To Treat It That Way) With Les Alfred · Hurdle with Emily Abbate

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: If you're able to spend your time on the things
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: that you say matter most to you, that creates so
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: much internal alignment.
• 0:21
  Speaker 2: Hey everybody, Emily Abadi here, you are listening to another
• 0:24
  Speaker 2: installment of Hurdle Moment from Hurdle.
• 0:27
  Speaker 3: A wellness focused podcast.
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: Reconnect with everyone from your favorite athletes to top experts
• 0:31
  Speaker 2: and industry CEOs about their highest highs, toughest moments, and
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: everything in between. We all go through hurdles in life,
• 0:39
  Speaker 2: and my goal through these discussions is to empower you
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: to better navigate yours and move with intention so that
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: you can stride towards your own big potential and of
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: course have some fun along the way. For today's episode,
• 0:53
  Speaker 2: I am bringing back Less Alfred. She is the host
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: of the Balanced Black Girl podcast. She's also a yogi
• 1:02
  Speaker 2: and I loved having her on so much for round
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: one when we talked about how to be more disciplined.
• 1:08
  Speaker 2: I'll link it in the show notes. I knew that
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: I wanted to have her back to chat some more,
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: and I figured what better of a time than now,
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: because she recently kicked off a money and abundance series
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: over Unbalanced Black Girl, and I just love it so
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: In today's episode, we are actually chatting not only about money,
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: but about time and why your time is more valuable
• 1:34
  Speaker 2: than your money. I'll say that again, why your time
• 1:37
  Speaker 2: is more valuable than your money?
• 1:41
  Speaker 3: As Les says, so many people they.
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: Treat time as this like completely scarce resource, something that
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: it truly feels like we never have enough of. But
• 1:52
  Speaker 2: what happens when you get really intentional and specific about
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: what you want to do with your time, when you
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: home in on what your values are and then execute
• 2:03
  Speaker 2: on a day by day basis based on those value
• 2:07
  Speaker 2: to get the most of your time. It's something that
• 2:11
  Speaker 2: I really loved jamming with less on today, and I
• 2:15
  Speaker 2: know it might make you rethink the way you are
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: going about your days. I also love the exercises that
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: both Less and myself share about how we get the
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: most out of our time, including time blocking and keeping
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: track of a time log or a time journal. Both
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: of those have really, really, really really helped me throughout
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: the last few years as I have turned into a
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: full time entrepreneur, one that is managing her own schedule
• 2:44
  Speaker 2: and really trying to make the absolute most of her time.
• 2:50
  Speaker 2: A huge thank you, too, Less for giving me her
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: time for prioritizing this.
• 2:55
  Speaker 3: It is so so appreciated.
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: Make sure you are following along with the show over
• 3:01
  Speaker 2: on the socials. It is at Hurdle podcast. I am
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: over at Emily a body. I am looking forward to
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: tonight's Safety in Numbers event. If you're local to New York,
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: I can't wait to see you there. And then, also,
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: if you haven't done so yet, do meet a solid
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: and make sure you're subscribed to the weekly Hurdle newsletter.
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: I'd love to send you all of the same inspiration
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: motivation tips that you love that you get on the
• 3:24
  Speaker 2: regular on the show, directly into your inbox every single
• 3:28
  Speaker 2: Friday morning. The link to do that, the link to
• 3:31
  Speaker 2: subscribe is in the show notes.
• 3:35
  Speaker 3: I believe that's it for now.
• 3:37
  Speaker 2: With that, let's get to hurdling.
• 4:00
  Speaker 4: Today.
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: I am sitting back down again with Les Alfred.
• 4:04
  Speaker 3: She's the host of the Balanced Black Girl podcast.
• 4:07
  Speaker 4: How you doing today? Hello, thank you so much for
• 4:10
  Speaker 4: having me back. I'm good, I'm good. I'm glad to
• 4:12
  Speaker 4: be here.
• 4:13
  Speaker 3: I am glad to have you here.
• 4:15
  Speaker 2: I knew I needed to reach out because I love, love,
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: love the series that you have going on right now
• 4:24
  Speaker 2: over Unbalanced Black Girl called money and abundance, and today
• 4:30
  Speaker 2: we are here to talk about why time is more
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: valuable than money. What prompted you to dive into this
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: series over on Balanced Black Girl.
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I, over the past few years have become quite
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: the personal finance nerd.
• 4:47
  Speaker 4: I mean, I think I've.
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: Always been interested in personal finance to an extent. I've
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: always been a pretty naturally frugal person and managed money
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: pretty well, like being able to do a lot with
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: a little. And over the past year or so, I've
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: started reaching some of my major financial goals and milestones
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: that I'd set out for myself, and I'm like, Okay,
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: what's next, Like how do I build? How do I
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: improve upon this? I'm so used to having very little
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: and making it go further, but now that I have
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: a little bit more, how can I really leverage that?
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: And So I've just dove headfirst into the personal finance
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: world and wanted to bring that to my podcast because
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: our financial wellness intersects with every other area of wellness,
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: and I don't think that the conversations are approached in
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: that way enough. So I wanted to bring it to
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: my community, to the community.
• 5:37
  Speaker 2: I you know, money is so interesting because It's one
• 5:39
  Speaker 2: of those taboo topics that we don't outwardly touch on
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: all of the time. Yet it is literally one of
• 5:47
  Speaker 2: the only things that every single person probably almost always
• 5:52
  Speaker 2: has anxiety about.
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 5:54
  Speaker 4: Yeah, and it impacts every area of your life.
• 5:56
  Speaker 2: I would say one of the first things I do
• 5:58
  Speaker 2: every single day after I shut off my alarm is like,
• 6:02
  Speaker 2: just cross check that my bank account exists.
• 6:05
  Speaker 4: Yes, for sure.
• 6:08
  Speaker 3: What I love that.
• 6:09
  Speaker 2: We're talking about isn't necessarily how to make more money
• 6:13
  Speaker 2: what's going on with your side hustle, Although these are
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: things that you have recorded it about and we've talked
• 6:20
  Speaker 2: about over here on Hurdle as well, But we're talking
• 6:23
  Speaker 2: about why time is more valuable than money. So before
• 6:28
  Speaker 2: we really dive into the discussion, talk to me about
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: why this was where you wanted to begin the convo.
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's because time is such a valuable asset. It
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: is an asset that is incredibly precious, and it is
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: the only asset that we can't get back. Like, no
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: matter how broke you are or how bleak your financial
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: situation is, it is possible to make more money. No
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: matter how much money you lose, it is absolutely possible
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: to get it back or make more now, not saying
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: that's easy, very hard. If we're easy, a lot more
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: people would do it. But it is absolutely possible. For time,
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: It's not possible to get time back. And I think
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: sometimes with time we can have a lot of anxiety
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: around it, whether it's on a micro level of oh,
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: my gosh, I have so much to do in a day,
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: or on a macro level of like, oh, I'm this
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: age and I haven't gotten this done yet. And I
• 7:23
  Speaker 1: think that when we're more aware of how we spend
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: our time, it can help us alleviate some of that anxiety.
• 7:29
  Speaker 2: You just set a key phrase there, when we're more
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: aware of how we spend our time. So how do
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: we become more aware? First and foremost, Yeah, I.
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: Think it's about viewing time as an asset that we
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: can work with instead of viewing time as something that
• 7:46
  Speaker 1: we never have enough of, Because if we view time
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: as something we never have enough of, then we will
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: never have enough of it. As opposed to when we
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: see time as a tool, we can work with it
• 7:57
  Speaker 1: and we cannot see time pass saying as a bad
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: thing or an anxiety and docing thing. It's something that
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: can really be a tool to help us create the
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: lives that we want to live. And so I think
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: the number one thing is just being aware of how
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: we spend our time, where does it go, what do
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: we do in a normal day. And I think it's
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: very similar to money. How you said one of the
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: things that you like to do each day is like
• 8:20
  Speaker 1: make sure your bank account is still there, even with money,
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: Like the number one budgeting tip is like check your
• 8:25
  Speaker 1: accounts and know how much money you have. That's like
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: the best thing anyone can do for themselves financially, because
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: I think we've all probably had times where we maybe
• 8:33
  Speaker 1: avoid our money a little bit and then we get
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: a little swipe happy, and that's not the best versus
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: when you're checking on it, you're always more conscious. But
• 8:40
  Speaker 1: with time, it's the same thing. You can absolutely lose hours,
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: years of your life on TikTok, which I've absolutely done.
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: But when we're being aware and conscious of what we're doing,
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: we can make more informed decisions about how we want
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: to spend our time.
• 8:56
  Speaker 3: Definitely.
• 8:57
  Speaker 2: So I remember when I was at my first job
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: out of college, there was an exercise that my boss
• 9:03
  Speaker 2: made me do, which I was so spiteful about at
• 9:06
  Speaker 2: the time. Time keyword here to keep track of what
• 9:11
  Speaker 2: we were doing during the day and.
• 9:13
  Speaker 3: For how long. And it felt like very big brother
• 9:18
  Speaker 3: in the moment.
• 9:19
  Speaker 2: But now when I feel as though there are things
• 9:22
  Speaker 2: that I have going on in my life, goals that
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: I have, and I'm not making any progress, I always
• 9:27
  Speaker 2: go back to this exercise because it's so helpful to
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: get a better understanding of where you are allocating that time,
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: how you are spending your day. It may not be
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: something that you're cognizant of that you're doing that TikTok
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: scroll right and before you know it, it's two hours
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: from right now, and the document you were looking at
• 9:48
  Speaker 2: two hours and five minutes ago is still blink in
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: front of you.
• 9:52
  Speaker 3: Right. So that's been a tool that I've used many
• 9:57
  Speaker 3: a time. What about you?
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: Do you have any other recommendations for how we can
• 10:00
  Speaker 2: be more cognizant of the ways that we're spending it.
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so love the time tracking exercise that you just shared.
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: I think that's a huge one. I also really love
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: time blocking. I think sometimes when we think about how
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: we spend our time, we automatically assume that we need
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: to be doing more things and doing them faster, and
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: that's not always the case. Sometimes even being aware of
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: time is helping you take your time, helping you understand
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: just how much thought and effort goes into something and
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: learning how to really appreciate that. So I also really
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: like using time blocking, where I will set a specific
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: amount of time to solely focus on one thing or
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: similar things, kind of in that block, not beating myself
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: up if I don't get it all done, but to
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: truly understand my habits and my patterns and my attention
• 10:48
  Speaker 1: span and if I get distracted. I see that more
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: as an invitation of like, Okay, what do I need
• 10:53
  Speaker 1: in this moment to stay focused, as opposed to beating
• 10:55
  Speaker 1: myself up for not staying focused, but working with smaller
• 10:58
  Speaker 1: chunks of time to do that a lot less intimidating.
• 11:02
  Speaker 2: Yeah, And with the time blocking, what I like is
• 11:05
  Speaker 2: that concept of grace a little bit, right, So you
• 11:08
  Speaker 2: may have a task that you know, realistically if you
• 11:11
  Speaker 2: were like grind grind, grind could take you an hour,
• 11:15
  Speaker 2: But what if you gave yourself the grace to do
• 11:17
  Speaker 2: it in an hour and a half.
• 11:19
  Speaker 3: Would that make you feel better?
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: Because that's also something to be cognizant of right, this
• 11:23
  Speaker 2: idea of how do you feel by the way that
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: you spend your time?
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: Exactly? Yes, one hundred percent.
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: That feeling thing can be challenging as well, I believe,
• 11:33
  Speaker 2: because it is really about coming to a place where
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: you accept that being productive and unhappy may not feel
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: as good as being maybe a little bit less quote
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: unquote productive, but feeling very like content and good with
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: where you're at.
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 11:52
  Speaker 4: Absolutely.
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: I mean my favorite word that I'm constantly repeating to
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: myself all the time is spaceacious, spaciousness. How can I
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: apply spaciousness to all that I do? If I'm giving,
• 12:05
  Speaker 1: how can I give from a spacious place? If I'm
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: creating content? How can I create content that is light
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: and fun and spacious as opposed to like cranking it
• 12:14
  Speaker 1: out and putting all this stress in the input because
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: that's going to come out in the output. So I
• 12:19
  Speaker 1: almost see time and even looking at productivity as how
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: can we create more space for ourselves as opposed to
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: how can we cram as much as possible into this
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: short period of time?
• 12:29
  Speaker 2: Right?
• 12:30
  Speaker 4: Right?
• 12:31
  Speaker 3: Yeah? Oh, I love this word spacious.
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: So for you, when you started to kind of get
• 12:37
  Speaker 2: on board with this, idea that time is your most
• 12:41
  Speaker 2: valuable thing. It's here as we're talking about more valuable
• 12:44
  Speaker 2: than money.
• 12:45
  Speaker 3: What changed for you?
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: I think I became a bit more optimistic and found
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: just a little bit more ease and how I approached things.
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: A lot of my relationship with time really changed when
• 12:59
  Speaker 1: I entered my thirties, because I think when you're in
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: your teens and twenties, the idea of turning thirty is
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: like this big scary thing. You feel like, you know,
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: turning thirty, you're Cinderella. You're going to turn into a
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: pumpkin at midnight, right like your thirtieth birthday midnight, And
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: it seems like this scary thing. And if you haven't
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: accomplished all these things by the time you're thirty, then
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: you know you're a failure. And right after I turned thirty,
• 13:27
  Speaker 1: my grandmother passed away, and she was in her mid eighties,
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: and it, obviously, you know, was a very sad thing,
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: but I was also thinking, like, Okay, she lived to
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: her mid eighties. Hopefully you know I will too, or
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: a little bit longer. I can't imagine staying in the
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: same spot for the next fifty plus years, just because
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: I didn't do something by this artificial deadline of thirty.
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: We actually have so much time. Like life is short,
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: but we also have time, and we can change and
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: we can evolve and we can make life hours. And
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: so that's what really started shifting my perspective of time
• 14:02
  Speaker 1: and help me have a more positive relationship with time.
• 14:06
  Speaker 3: Yeah, thanks for sharing that.
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: I think that what's also really beautiful about what you
• 14:12
  Speaker 2: said is the sentiment that, yes, life is short, but
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: we also have so much time, Like we get to choose,
• 14:20
  Speaker 2: We have the opportunity to choose how we want to
• 14:24
  Speaker 2: use it. So for someone that comes to you and
• 14:28
  Speaker 2: says like, yeah, yeah, time management, like I get it,
• 14:31
  Speaker 2: I still feel like I just don't have enough time.
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: What is it that you tell them? Well, what is
• 14:36
  Speaker 1: it that you want to have time for? Right? If
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: you feel like you don't have enough time, what is
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: it that you don't have enough time for? Is it
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: because you just feel like you have too much on
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: your plate? Is it because you have a lot on
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: your plate and none of it is the stuff that
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: you want to do. I would do some reflection around there,
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: like what does not having enough time mean? Are you overwhelmed?
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: Or does it mean, you just don't get to do
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: enough of the stuff that you want to do. That's
• 14:59
  Speaker 1: going to kind of be you like a choose your
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: own adventure. If it's the former, you just feel like
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: you have a lot on your plate. What can you
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: get off of your plate? A lot of the things
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: that we have that we get so stressed about are
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: either not real, are negotiable, or are things that we
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: can get help with to clear off our plate a
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: little bit. So many deadlines are absolutely fake. Most deadlines
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: absolutely fake. So a lot of what we stress about
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: is very negotiable. Now, if it's the latter, if you're
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: just like, man, I just don't have I'm not using
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: my time to do things that I want to do
• 15:35
  Speaker 1: that fill me up, then how can you start incorporating
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: more of those things into your day in small ways.
• 15:40
  Speaker 1: That's something that I've felt lately, is like, man, I
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: use my time well, but I'm not these things that
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: I'm doing with my time, it's not the stuff that
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: I want to be doing. So how can we start
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: infusing those things that we want to be doing into
• 15:52
  Speaker 1: our days in super small micro ways to kind of
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: keep us going that we can build upon.
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: From there, Taking a break from today's episode to talk
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: to you about my sponsor at ag one from Athletic Greens.
• 16:14
  Speaker 3: This is my secret sauce. There I said it.
• 16:18
  Speaker 2: There are so many aspects that go into my overall
• 16:22
  Speaker 2: wellness routine, but I would truly be lost if I
• 16:25
  Speaker 2: didn't have ag one from Athletic.
• 16:27
  Speaker 3: Greens as a part of it.
• 16:29
  Speaker 2: It's got seventy five whole foodstorist ingredients as well as probiotics, probiotics,
• 16:33
  Speaker 2: adaptagens and superfoods. It gives me so much goodness in
• 16:39
  Speaker 2: one simple scoop.
• 16:41
  Speaker 3: I shake it up.
• 16:41
  Speaker 2: Every single morning right before I walk into my office.
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: I mix it with some ice, cold water, sometimes a
• 16:49
  Speaker 2: squeeze of lemon, and I just get right to it.
• 16:52
  Speaker 2: And when I sit down at my desk with my
• 16:54
  Speaker 2: AG one, it is my sign to myself that it
• 16:57
  Speaker 2: is go time. Drinking ag one on the regular it
• 17:00
  Speaker 2: helps me feel more clear, less drowsy, more attentive on
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: the task at hand. I thank the adaptagens for that,
• 17:08
  Speaker 2: and also just good in my body, which that's how
• 17:11
  Speaker 2: we all want to feel. Right, You have got to
• 17:14
  Speaker 2: get in on the ag one gang today. Plus I
• 17:18
  Speaker 2: didn't mention twelve servings of fruits and vegetables with every
• 17:22
  Speaker 2: single scoop. Head on over to athleticgreens dot com slash hurdle.
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: Agama is Athleticgreens dot com slash hurdle to get five
• 17:32
  Speaker 2: free travel packs as well as a year's supply of
• 17:35
  Speaker 2: Vitamin D with your purchase. So let's talk about that infusion.
• 17:48
  Speaker 2: Then let's bring this back to the concept of values.
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: When you did this exercise and you start to think
• 17:53
  Speaker 2: about how you were allocating your time, can you paint
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: a picture of maybe where you started to identify. Okay,
• 18:01
  Speaker 2: this is important to me and this is how I
• 18:04
  Speaker 2: want to make a shift.
• 18:05
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: Absolutely so, I, like many people, am a remote worker,
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: even though I've spent a decade plus, you know, working
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: in offices, commuting whatever. For the past few years, I've
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: been a remote worker, and I still have very much
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: had like my cubicle blinders on, even though I'm working
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: at home and I have a pretty flexible work situation.
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: Once I'm sitting down at my desk, it is like
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: a vortex that I just feel like I can't leave.
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: And then by the end of the day, I'm like, oh,
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: all I did was sit in my apartment. All I
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: did was sit at my desk. I hate this. I
• 18:39
  Speaker 1: don't want to do this. I want to do other things. Well,
• 18:42
  Speaker 1: what's stopping me from doing other things? So why don't
• 18:45
  Speaker 1: I make plans to grab lunch in the middle of
• 18:47
  Speaker 1: the day, or why don't I if I don't have meetings,
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: make plans to do something else or to move somewhere else.
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: And I can still get my work done and get
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: those things done, but I can change where I am.
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: So I'm still spending the same amount of time, but
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: I'm changing my setting to be a little bit more
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: inclusive of what I want to do and what I
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: want to see. So I think it's it's just all
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: about looking at some of the ways that we restrict
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: ourselves or uphold restrictions for ourselves and pushing that boundary
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: a little bit.
• 19:19
  Speaker 2: And I love also the sentiment about the arbitrary deadlines
• 19:24
  Speaker 2: and the deadlines that aren't real. Can you paint a
• 19:27
  Speaker 2: picture of what an example of that might look like
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: that we may not even be realizing.
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, so many things I think about, Like
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: I have a newsletter that I usually send on Wednesday mornings,
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: and it usually goes out at like six thirty in
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: the morning, because my email service provider says that's the
• 19:44
  Speaker 1: best time for mornings, and so for so long, if
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: I didn't have it done Tuesday night to send out
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: at six thirty in the morning, I would stress out.
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: And then I was like, wait a minute, I can
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: also work on it Wednesday morning and send it out
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: at eight once it's done, and I think it'll be okay.
• 20:00
  Speaker 1: This is an imaginary deadline that I've placed on myself
• 20:03
  Speaker 1: and I'm stressing myself out with, and I can change it.
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: It can go out an hour later, that's okay. Or
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: if I have a deadline at work that I'm working
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: towards and I need more time, I can talk to
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: my manager and see can I get an extension, Or
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: if I can't get an extension, can we move around
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: these other things while I focus on this priority. All
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: of these things are negotiable because pretty much all deadlines
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: are made up by somebody. Even if you didn't make
• 20:27
  Speaker 1: up your own deadline, someone else made up a deadline
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: for you, So have an open conversation about it.
• 20:33
  Speaker 2: Last week, I fell asleep before I uploaded an episode
• 20:37
  Speaker 2: onto the hosting platform, Like I just fell asleep on
• 20:39
  Speaker 2: my couch and then I woke up dazed and confused,
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: and I moved to my bed and I woke up
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: the next morning at six point thirty and Hurdle usually
• 20:46
  Speaker 2: goes live at five. And I woke up and I
• 20:50
  Speaker 2: was like, oh my god, and like I have a
• 20:53
  Speaker 2: personal fire drill. But it didn't matter. It still went
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: into the world, like we still got the content. It's fine, yeah, exactly, Oh,
• 21:03
  Speaker 2: oh my god.
• 21:04
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 21:04
  Speaker 2: So I feel that I feel that I also do
• 21:07
  Speaker 2: want to go back to that buzzword of values. I
• 21:10
  Speaker 2: keep going back here because I think it's really important,
• 21:13
  Speaker 2: because it's bigger than just like wasting time scrolling away.
• 21:16
  Speaker 2: It's knowing that you have the opportunity to really think
• 21:19
  Speaker 2: about what's important to you to make time for it. So, yes,
• 21:25
  Speaker 2: when we get to that topic, maybe something like your
• 21:28
  Speaker 2: value is friendships and relationships, or maybe your value is
• 21:33
  Speaker 2: mental health and well being. If you start to think
• 21:36
  Speaker 2: about if you're allocating the time to those things, then
• 21:40
  Speaker 2: that'll probably shift your relationship with time.
• 21:42
  Speaker 3: Is that right?
• 21:44
  Speaker 4: Oh? Absolutely, yeah.
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: When you're able to, you know, thinking kind of along
• 21:48
  Speaker 1: the lines of spending your time like money. If you're
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: able to spend your time on the things that you
• 21:53
  Speaker 1: say matter most to you. That creates so much internal alignment.
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: It doesn't necessarily have to me in hours in the day,
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: because for most people, a lot of our hours go
• 22:02
  Speaker 1: towards working, and so you know, we have to be
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: mindful of that. But if we're able to put our
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: focus and our attention towards those things that we say
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: matter most to us, it creates such a sense of
• 22:16
  Speaker 1: centeredness and peace. And I think where a lot of
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: people feel disgruntled is where they feel like a lot
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: of their time and their attention is going towards things
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: that they don't value, and that is super frustrating.
• 22:27
  Speaker 2: Would you say that that concept brings about a bigger
• 22:31
  Speaker 2: question of how we shift.
• 22:32
  Speaker 3: The things in our lives that we don't value.
• 22:35
  Speaker 2: Oh?
• 22:35
  Speaker 1: Absolutely, And I think it also can shift even just
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: how much mental space we let something take up. You know,
• 22:44
  Speaker 1: one of the other experiences that I had that also
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: really shifted my relationship with time and work and priorities
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: and deadlines was this is early in my career. I
• 22:54
  Speaker 1: was kind of fresh out of college, and I was
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: working at this really big company and I was in
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: charge of putting together this big, like day long meeting
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: presentation thing, and the leaders that I worked for were
• 23:04
  Speaker 1: putting all this pressure of like this is so important
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: and eighty slide deck and do all of this stuff.
• 23:10
  Speaker 4: Basically, thirty minutes.
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: After this giant day long presentation I'm supposed to be
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: giving starts, we had an emergency with a supplier. All
• 23:17
  Speaker 1: the leaders who said for weeks that this was such
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: a big deal got totally distracted, pulled out of the room,
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: and bye bye went this presentation that I was stressing
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: about for weeks. And that gave me so much perspective
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: and really gave me an attitude of like, most of
• 23:34
  Speaker 1: what we do is made up because authorities can change
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: at a whim. And so that really helped me, especially
• 23:43
  Speaker 1: in the workplace, realized that other people's priorities don't have
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: to sway how I feel. What other people display a
• 23:52
  Speaker 1: sense of urgency about does not have to display a
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: sense of urgency in me. I decide what's urgent to
• 23:59
  Speaker 1: me and I can and then moving forward, take a
• 24:01
  Speaker 1: lot of these situations with a grain of salt, which
• 24:03
  Speaker 1: I've since done. Maybe it doesn't make me like the
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: most stellar employee, but it helps me keep my sanity,
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: and I feel a lot less stressed when things pop
• 24:11
  Speaker 1: up at work because I'm like, yeah, and when the
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: next priority comes up and this no longer matters, it's fine.
• 24:17
  Speaker 1: So I think we can just remember that a lot
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: of the sense of urgency that we feel is often
• 24:23
  Speaker 1: manufactured by other people, and that we get to decide
• 24:26
  Speaker 1: what is urgent to us.
• 24:29
  Speaker 2: And that's totally such a reminder or like a lesson
• 24:32
  Speaker 2: that yes, it's okay to be frustrated in that moment,
• 24:34
  Speaker 2: but now you moved forward with that knowledge, so it
• 24:37
  Speaker 2: wasn't a failure, so to speak. It was an opportunity
• 24:40
  Speaker 2: for you to gain a better understanding of how you
• 24:43
  Speaker 2: would work in that situation and now shift your perspective
• 24:47
  Speaker 2: going forward, to have this beautiful lesson about time management
• 24:51
  Speaker 2: and to know all of this about urgency.
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: Exactly like the things that we stress about, they don't
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: have to be stressful because they just don't that much.
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: And it doesn't mean don't do them, and it doesn't
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: mean don't do a good job, but it just means
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: don't get your blood.
• 25:06
  Speaker 2: Pressure up over it, don't get your blood pressure up
• 25:09
  Speaker 2: over it, just don't do it. I'm just thinking of
• 25:12
  Speaker 2: the person really that is having an issue with, like
• 25:17
  Speaker 2: getting out of the hustle mindset, is getting out of
• 25:19
  Speaker 2: the place where they are, Like, but if I don't
• 25:23
  Speaker 2: think about how I feel and just focus, focus, focus,
• 25:26
  Speaker 2: What advice do you have for that person about accepting
• 25:29
  Speaker 2: this idea of having a little bit more grace and
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: being a little bit more flexible with their time.
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think it's about understanding what your why is.
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: So usually when people are very goal oriented or very
• 25:41
  Speaker 1: money oriented, it's because they want something that money gives them. Right, obviously,
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: money is currency, it has that value. But for a
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: lot of people, money can create spaciousness when you can
• 25:54
  Speaker 1: afford to get help with things that can create more
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: time for you, or it creates a sense of security,
• 25:59
  Speaker 1: or it creates it's a sense of fulfillment. So I
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: think it's about understanding what is it that you're seeking.
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: And that's something that I've had a lot of reflection
• 26:09
  Speaker 1: over where I've had to think, actually, I'm doing all
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: of this because I want to work less. I'm doing
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: all of this because I also want to be able
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: to enjoy the fruits of my labor. So if it's
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: all labor, when am I actually getting to enjoy what
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: I'm doing it for. And that's when the bottom line
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: doesn't matter as much when you're not getting what it
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: is you want out of it. So I think really
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: remembering your why and saying, okay are my actions and
• 26:33
  Speaker 1: is what I'm getting out of this? Is that in
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: alignment with my why? And if not, maybe it's time
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: to adjust my priorities.
• 26:41
  Speaker 3: Ooh, that was good.
• 26:44
  Speaker 2: That's just like I mean, because really, what are you
• 26:48
  Speaker 2: doing and what are you doing it for? Right? And
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: it's like you said, that's truly what it comes down
• 26:53
  Speaker 2: to if you are working, working, working, and you're doing
• 26:56
  Speaker 2: it thinking like forty deers down the road, Like do
• 26:58
  Speaker 2: you really want to spend in the next forty years
• 27:01
  Speaker 2: in this place of like not really loving your life
• 27:05
  Speaker 2: just to forty years from now get there?
• 27:08
  Speaker 3: I'm not really sure if that's my moo.
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: Totally and you can do both. I think you can
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: be abundant and enjoy your life. It doesn't have to
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: be this super sacrificial either or thing all the time.
• 27:20
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 27:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah, So before I let you go today, you said
• 27:24
  Speaker 2: at the top of this that you are kind of
• 27:26
  Speaker 2: in that what's next phase you're thinking about now that
• 27:31
  Speaker 2: you have really handled a lot of personal debt, like
• 27:34
  Speaker 2: what you want to do, how you want to make
• 27:37
  Speaker 2: your money work for you. I would be remiss if
• 27:39
  Speaker 2: I didn't ask you just a little bit about how
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: you are making your money work for you these days.
• 27:44
  Speaker 2: I think we have a lot of people listening to
• 27:46
  Speaker 2: us chat right now that are probably in the same boat.
• 27:49
  Speaker 4: Yeah, absolutely so.
• 27:51
  Speaker 1: I think a lot of it is kind of related
• 27:53
  Speaker 1: to what we were just talking about. Where I'm looking at, Okay,
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: I've worked really hard and I've made some decisions that
• 28:00
  Speaker 1: gotten me to a good point. Why did I do that?
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: What did I do that for? Did I do that
• 28:07
  Speaker 1: just to hoard it and hold on to it, or
• 28:09
  Speaker 1: did I do that so that I could afford experiences
• 28:12
  Speaker 1: and so that I can bring in maybe a little
• 28:16
  Speaker 1: bit more help in my business so that I don't
• 28:18
  Speaker 1: have to do everything. Or did I do it so
• 28:20
  Speaker 1: that I could feel comfortable booking a nice trip and
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: sharing an experience with my family? So for me, a
• 28:27
  Speaker 1: lot of it has been around one, what are the
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: experiences that I want to have and how can I
• 28:32
  Speaker 1: prioritize that now that I can afford more of them?
• 28:35
  Speaker 1: And two, how can I be a little bit more
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: forward looking and looking at the ways that I want
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: to build in the future. So part of it has
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: been like loosening up my frugality, which I am a
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: chronically frugal person, and learning to be a little bit
• 28:49
  Speaker 1: less frugal has actually been a journey that I'm still on.
• 28:52
  Speaker 1: So that's part of it, so that I can enjoy
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: my life more. And then the other part is looking
• 28:57
  Speaker 1: at investments. Okay, if I have assets, how can I
• 29:01
  Speaker 1: grow them a little bit more? And so that's been
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: a really big priority for me this year as I've
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: paid off debt and moved some things around. So I'm
• 29:11
  Speaker 1: figuring out the balance, no pun intended of enjoying my
• 29:15
  Speaker 1: life now and setting myself up for the future, and
• 29:17
  Speaker 1: now that I have the space to do so.
• 29:20
  Speaker 3: We love it.
• 29:20
  Speaker 2: We love at least trying to find the balance for sure. Yes,
• 29:26
  Speaker 2: we are not the only two people that are thinking
• 29:29
  Speaker 2: about this. So many people are concerned and trying to
• 29:32
  Speaker 2: wise up on spending, especially also as a woman in
• 29:36
  Speaker 2: my thirties, I'm trying to think about what's next. And
• 29:38
  Speaker 2: I think that this is all such good content. So
• 29:41
  Speaker 2: where do the hurdlers find you? How do they follow
• 29:43
  Speaker 2: along with you so that they can get more money
• 29:45
  Speaker 2: content as you chat about in your Money in Abundance
• 29:50
  Speaker 2: series on Balanced Black Girl.
• 29:52
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so, new episodes of Balance Black Girl drop every Tuesday.
• 29:55
  Speaker 1: So whatever podcast app that you're listening to Hurdle on,
• 29:58
  Speaker 1: you can also find Balanced Black Girl. I'll add it
• 30:00
  Speaker 1: to your rotation and I drop new episodes every week
• 30:05
  Speaker 1: amazing And on Insta Insta, I'm at Balanced.
• 30:09
  Speaker 2: Less Perfect, I'm over at Emily Body and at Hurdle Podcast.
• 30:13
  Speaker 3: Another Hurdle Conquered. Catch you guys next time