Latest / The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast / Dating Tips From Women Who Found Love with Kaity Biggar, Joan Vassos, and Susan Noles: Will You Accept This Advice?

Transcript

Dating Tips From Women Who Found Love with Kaity Biggar, Joan Vassos, and Susan Noles: Will You Accept This Advice? · The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: This is the almost famous podcast with iHeartRadio.
• 0:05
  Speaker 2: Hi everybody, this is Trista and I am so excited
• 0:08
  Speaker 2: because I get to do another will you accept this
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: advice podcast? And I have such beautiful women with me.
• 0:15
  Speaker 2: We're in Tahoe for the annual we're calling it annual
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: pickleball tournament since last year.
• 0:23
  Speaker 3: And you guys, I just won. I know you.
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: Did, no and you know what is I see you
• 0:31
  Speaker 2: on the cake. It's the best part. And I Bob's wife.
• 0:36
  Speaker 2: We switched and we played against the boys so much better.
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: You know, I wish I saw that. It wasn't they're
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: talking about it right now.
• 0:56
  Speaker 3: Anyway.
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: Okay, welcome Katie, Susan and Joan.
• 0:59
  Speaker 3: So thank you ldies for being here.
• 1:01
  Speaker 4: So happy to be here.
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: Thank you.
• 1:02
  Speaker 2: Okay, so we're going to talk dating advice. We have
• 1:06
  Speaker 2: got a married Susan is long distance in a relationship,
• 1:11
  Speaker 2: and Joan is long distance engaged. So I feel like
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: we have very different perspectives and I'm very excited to
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: get all of your perspectives for the people out there
• 1:22
  Speaker 2: who are in the dating pool. I haven't been in
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: the dating pool for a little bit twenty some time,
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: quite some time we'll be married twenty four years in December,
• 1:33
  Speaker 2: so it's been a while.
• 1:36
  Speaker 5: So I.
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: Course, I just said earlier.
• 1:40
  Speaker 6: You and your husband were like arm and arm on
• 1:43
  Speaker 6: the boat this morning, and I said, look at that,
• 1:44
  Speaker 6: after all those years, they're still in love. It's so
• 1:48
  Speaker 6: nice to see, and every one of us want that
• 1:51
  Speaker 6: for ourselves.
• 1:51
  Speaker 3: Thank you.
• 1:52
  Speaker 6: I'll never get twenty four years in because I'll be dead.
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: You could make it, you.
• 1:59
  Speaker 3: Could make it roll off that as well.
• 2:02
  Speaker 5: I saw your husband he went into the water and
• 2:05
  Speaker 5: he came out of the water and you guys were
• 2:07
  Speaker 5: kissing in the HUGGI and I was like, oh my god,
• 2:09
  Speaker 5: that's so beautiful. So I went to go get my
• 2:11
  Speaker 5: camera and get a video. Totally missed it, but it
• 2:14
  Speaker 5: was such a beautiful moment.
• 2:15
  Speaker 7: And I think that.
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: People see that because you don't.
• 2:18
  Speaker 3: You don't see that too long. Unfortunately.
• 2:21
  Speaker 4: Yeah, they're in love, like like everybody had a very
• 2:25
  Speaker 4: supportive of husband, but we were not touching.
• 2:26
  Speaker 3: Peey.
• 2:27
  Speaker 4: You guys are very outward about it and that like
• 2:30
  Speaker 4: you continue to show what you showed on the TV
• 2:33
  Speaker 4: like a million years ago.
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: Thank you still have it.
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: Sorry, we're not I try not to be obnoxious.
• 2:38
  Speaker 3: About it. I'm always love holding hands.
• 2:41
  Speaker 5: Yeah, you love language, and you guys, align with your
• 2:45
  Speaker 5: love language is just beautiful.
• 2:48
  Speaker 3: Yeah, thank you, keep going. I'm just kidding.
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: Okay, So let's talk about you guys. So I want
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: to talk about dating. And obviously one thing we all
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: have in common is that we went on national television
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: to date, so we've got that good to talk about,
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: and for some of us it worked out. Let's go
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: back though, in our minds to when we were single.
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: What was your general approach to dating?
• 3:18
  Speaker 4: So like in like our part two, Yeah, it's very
• 3:22
  Speaker 4: different than part one. Part one, you're looking for like
• 3:25
  Speaker 4: a father to your children's got to be looking for
• 3:27
  Speaker 4: and Ryan, like you saw how loving he was, and yes,
• 3:30
  Speaker 4: somebody to build a life with. It's very different.
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: In part two.
• 3:32
  Speaker 4: You're looking for somebody to like enjoy the second half
• 3:35
  Speaker 4: of life because you've already built the other stuff. You
• 3:37
  Speaker 4: already have your family, your home, You've probably financially secure,
• 3:41
  Speaker 4: more financially secure than you were when you were younger.
• 3:43
  Speaker 4: So you're looking for somebody that is fun yep, and
• 3:46
  Speaker 4: that you can you know, enjoy this second half of
• 3:49
  Speaker 4: life that you've worked really so hard to create Like
• 3:51
  Speaker 4: it was hard because my husband passed away and I
• 3:54
  Speaker 4: had this like blank hole of future in front of me,
• 3:59
  Speaker 4: and I had to recreated and I had to decide, like,
• 4:02
  Speaker 4: you know, all these plans that he and I had
• 4:03
  Speaker 4: made are all gone, and like what type of person
• 4:06
  Speaker 4: I wanted to have like in the second half, like
• 4:08
  Speaker 4: the second piece of life. And it was like somebody
• 4:11
  Speaker 4: that I want to have fun with and then that
• 4:12
  Speaker 4: will like share in like these adventures, like the bucket lists.
• 4:15
  Speaker 4: I could just start doing the bucket list now, and.
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: Any guys checked anything off your bucket list A couple.
• 4:19
  Speaker 4: Of little things like not a ton, but we like
• 4:21
  Speaker 4: so we're going to Europe in the end of this month,
• 4:24
  Speaker 4: and that's a little I've been to Europe a bunch
• 4:26
  Speaker 4: of times, but that's always been a bucketts Like we're
• 4:29
  Speaker 4: doing the rivieras and I've always yet so that's going
• 4:31
  Speaker 4: to be really fun.
• 4:32
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 4:33
  Speaker 4: Yeah, So you look for something different in the second
• 4:36
  Speaker 4: half of life.
• 4:36
  Speaker 3: That totally makes sense. Yeah.
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: Do you feel, oh my god, she can't understand menopause.
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: It steals your thoughts, so they go.
• 4:49
  Speaker 4: It was there one second ago.
• 4:51
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I hear it was.
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: I went bye bye yeah, okay.
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: So I think my kids were like seriously all the time.
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: They're like, Mom, seriously, I told you that yesterday. Mom, seriously,
• 5:05
  Speaker 2: I told you that. Whenever I'm like you.
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: Never told that, I said, yes, I did.
• 5:11
  Speaker 3: I can't wait. It's all those amazing things.
• 5:15
  Speaker 2: Okay, So what about you? What was your general quote
• 5:18
  Speaker 2: coach to dating?
• 5:18
  Speaker 6: So I kept trying and trying when on TV, still
• 5:21
  Speaker 6: didn't get it, that's okay. And I was on vacation
• 5:26
  Speaker 6: and I found it when I came off the show.
• 5:30
  Speaker 6: I really didn't want anybody. I fell in love with myself.
• 5:34
  Speaker 6: I love that really really okay, with who I am,
• 5:40
  Speaker 6: and at sixty plus years old, that's big, right.
• 5:43
  Speaker 2: I didn't need.
• 5:44
  Speaker 6: I had new friends and people that did what I
• 5:47
  Speaker 6: do in life. I want to travel now. I want
• 5:50
  Speaker 6: to enjoy life. And one night on vacation with Kathy,
• 5:56
  Speaker 6: we had espression Martini's and I was wide awake and
• 5:58
  Speaker 6: couldn't go to sleep, and I downloaded Tinder. Okay, and
• 6:01
  Speaker 6: I met a french man that I fell madly in
• 6:05
  Speaker 6: love with, madly in love with. It's been a year
• 6:08
  Speaker 6: and a half they ship. Okay, I love that man forever.
• 6:14
  Speaker 6: He's like the perfect man. His work ethics aren't.
• 6:19
  Speaker 3: I'm not huge with her.
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: It doesn't work, got it?
• 6:22
  Speaker 5: Oh you're seeing his work is an incredibly hard work.
• 6:27
  Speaker 4: She works, works, works every minute of every day.
• 6:30
  Speaker 3: And he works to eat. Yeah, he has in the kitchens.
• 6:35
  Speaker 4: He doesn't work.
• 6:36
  Speaker 3: Oh, got it.
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: So do you think that's a cultural difference because he's French.
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: Maybe?
• 6:43
  Speaker 6: So when they go on vacation or holiday, they go
• 6:46
  Speaker 6: a month. We as Americans, if you're lucky, you get
• 6:50
  Speaker 6: too weak.
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: Totally, you know what I'm saying, And how do you
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: do that?
• 6:54
  Speaker 6: I think back in his story as he says, he
• 6:57
  Speaker 6: used to have lots of money, restaurants, this, that, and
• 6:59
  Speaker 6: the third. The Vorst was a shock for him. He
• 7:01
  Speaker 6: fled to the island. So he lives in Saint Martin's, Okay,
• 7:04
  Speaker 6: And when I go to stay with him, he doesn't
• 7:07
  Speaker 6: have air conditioned downstairs, only in the bedroom. He lives minimal, minimal.
• 7:15
  Speaker 6: I like to eat steak, Yeah, you like to espressed
• 7:19
  Speaker 6: on martinis.
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: And it took a year and a half.
• 7:23
  Speaker 6: So I'm not saying just when you see a red flag,
• 7:28
  Speaker 6: don't ignore it. I'll get color blind when I fall
• 7:31
  Speaker 6: in love totally, you know, it breaks my heart because
• 7:35
  Speaker 6: I adore them.
• 7:36
  Speaker 7: Yeah, and so are you guys still together or yes?
• 7:39
  Speaker 6: But I feel a different way inside. I can't say
• 7:44
  Speaker 6: forever now, Like my dream was to live happily ever
• 7:47
  Speaker 6: after we'll do the winters on the island and the
• 7:52
  Speaker 6: summer's up.
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, that was sure perfect.
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah, well, what I feel like is so important about
• 7:59
  Speaker 2: what you said, And this goes for people who are young,
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: like twenties, that knowing yourself and loving yourself before you
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: go into any relationship is so important. It's important, right, yeah.
• 8:14
  Speaker 6: And don't settle why I always say that I misus
• 8:18
  Speaker 6: fix it right, Yeah, I always have broken hearted man
• 8:21
  Speaker 6: and don't know what real love feels like. And I
• 8:25
  Speaker 6: love them to that they know after they've been with me. Yeah,
• 8:29
  Speaker 6: I find needy men that I fix and I feel
• 8:33
  Speaker 6: like God put me here sometimes just for that purpose
• 8:36
  Speaker 6: and then it's over in the year or two.
• 8:41
  Speaker 4: That's what you want to put yourself on your back
• 8:45
  Speaker 4: and enjoy it.
• 8:46
  Speaker 2: But you you were done in the enneagram test.
• 8:50
  Speaker 3: What's that? It's like a personality test? Oh, I've heard
• 8:53
  Speaker 3: of those. I wonder if you're a helper. You like
• 8:58
  Speaker 3: that word.
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: She's a helper.
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so you should do an Enneagram test.
• 9:04
  Speaker 6: Like I used to have a podcast, Tell me though,
• 9:06
  Speaker 6: if it told me something what I feel differently, So you.
• 9:08
  Speaker 2: Can do like research into who you are as that
• 9:11
  Speaker 2: person as that personality type, and like what you should
• 9:15
  Speaker 2: be doing and what like triggers you and all of
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: these amazing things we're gonna talk.
• 9:20
  Speaker 3: It's great.
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: I did.
• 9:21
  Speaker 2: I used to do a podcast called Better, et cetera.
• 9:23
  Speaker 2: And I had this guy who wrote a book on enneagram.
• 9:26
  Speaker 2: I'll get it, I'll I'll remember what the book is.
• 9:29
  Speaker 2: But it's really kind of powerful, especially because you are
• 9:34
  Speaker 2: like about like self betterment and empowerment and loving yourself
• 9:37
  Speaker 2: and knowing yourself, and it really is so fascinating to
• 9:41
  Speaker 2: like learn the kind of personality type.
• 9:43
  Speaker 6: You are and what you can do yourself totally do
• 9:47
  Speaker 6: things better for yourself, attract the same kind of people.
• 9:51
  Speaker 6: I don't wait put him down at all, because I
• 9:53
  Speaker 6: still love the man. Yes, but he lives far away
• 9:56
  Speaker 6: and the language is a whole nother.
• 9:58
  Speaker 2: Shh, gosh, I bet does he speak English slunely?
• 10:01
  Speaker 3: No?
• 10:02
  Speaker 1: I WoT say fluent?
• 10:03
  Speaker 3: Oh really?
• 10:04
  Speaker 6: And my French. I took lessons at class every week.
• 10:08
  Speaker 6: I mean, you can ask a girlfriend the other every year.
• 10:12
  Speaker 6: She speaks very well. Her breeding must be bigger than mine,
• 10:16
  Speaker 6: and she retains.
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: More than I do. Yeah, I've tried it all.
• 10:20
  Speaker 6: I'm never going to speak friends. And he even says
• 10:22
  Speaker 6: when I try, I sound Spanish, oh.
• 10:28
  Speaker 3: Oh gosh.
• 10:29
  Speaker 2: If I go to another country, I start saying, oh
• 10:33
  Speaker 2: lah or whatever.
• 10:37
  Speaker 3: Okay, So what about you?
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: What were your general I.
• 10:41
  Speaker 5: Think for me because dating in my twenties and I
• 10:45
  Speaker 5: was never one that was, you know, searching for a
• 10:48
  Speaker 5: one night stand or anything like that, I really had
• 10:50
  Speaker 5: to connect with somebody.
• 10:51
  Speaker 3: So for me, in order to really.
• 10:54
  Speaker 5: Connect with somebody and get to the next step with them,
• 10:58
  Speaker 5: I always looked at it like this, I don't have kids,
• 11:03
  Speaker 5: but if I were to have a daughter, would I
• 11:06
  Speaker 5: want my daughter to be with.
• 11:07
  Speaker 7: The man I am?
• 11:08
  Speaker 1: Wow?
• 11:09
  Speaker 3: You know with obviously not, but you know what I'm saying.
• 11:14
  Speaker 3: And I also thought of it like I want to be.
• 11:19
  Speaker 3: I never had role.
• 11:20
  Speaker 7: Models of what love looked like.
• 11:23
  Speaker 5: My mom never got married, and I always thought about, like,
• 11:27
  Speaker 5: because I'm so maternal, that I always want my kids
• 11:30
  Speaker 5: to look up to who I marry, our relationship and
• 11:35
  Speaker 5: want that for themselves. So for me, I was always
• 11:39
  Speaker 5: looking for somebody who was kind, compassionate, all those things, funny, goofy,
• 11:44
  Speaker 5: but somebody who can be a good father.
• 11:47
  Speaker 3: And that's something I didn't have in my life.
• 11:49
  Speaker 7: I didn't have a good father.
• 11:50
  Speaker 5: So I think that's like when I first met Zach,
• 11:53
  Speaker 5: I always tell people this, you can just tell how
• 11:57
  Speaker 5: sweet of a man he is, so kind, and immediately
• 12:00
  Speaker 5: you just know he's going to be an amazing father.
• 12:03
  Speaker 7: So that's what's important.
• 12:06
  Speaker 5: And I didn't date too much, but I had a
• 12:09
  Speaker 5: good head on my shoulders. I knew my self worth,
• 12:12
  Speaker 5: I loved myself, and I knew what I brought to
• 12:15
  Speaker 5: the table. Yeah, right, so that's what I was also
• 12:17
  Speaker 5: very confident on the Bachelor. Yeah, everybody's like, oh, like,
• 12:19
  Speaker 5: how are you still friends with Gabby? How are you
• 12:21
  Speaker 5: still friends with all these girls? I'm like totally, easy peasy,
• 12:24
  Speaker 5: Like I know who I am. I don't want to
• 12:25
  Speaker 5: bring to the table, you don't want to be with me.
• 12:29
  Speaker 5: I felt the same way exactly.
• 12:30
  Speaker 3: Right, Then that's fine. I'll be okay no matter what.
• 12:33
  Speaker 3: I will be okay totally.
• 12:34
  Speaker 7: But I know what I want for myself. I know
• 12:36
  Speaker 7: the type of man I want for myself and I
• 12:38
  Speaker 7: want for my kids. Yes, future kids love it? Oh yeah,
• 12:41
  Speaker 7: I love it.
• 12:42
  Speaker 3: I love it.
• 12:42
  Speaker 6: I knew early on as a young young person it
• 12:45
  Speaker 6: took years to find the maturity.
• 12:49
  Speaker 4: Yeah, a lot of maturity and dating. I feel like
• 12:52
  Speaker 4: I never had that confidence when I was younger, but
• 12:54
  Speaker 4: as I got older and I had a really, you know,
• 12:56
  Speaker 4: wonderful relationship with my late husband, when I went into
• 12:59
  Speaker 4: the dating world, like my second chapter, I was way
• 13:03
  Speaker 4: more confident, and.
• 13:04
  Speaker 3: I was I was really super picky.
• 13:08
  Speaker 2: As you should be alone also, yeah, okay.
• 13:14
  Speaker 5: Alone, yes, because that's where people settle when they're not exactly.
• 13:29
  Speaker 3: What about advice?
• 13:30
  Speaker 2: Does anyone have any amazing advice that they recall getting
• 13:35
  Speaker 2: or giving to someone when they were dating?
• 13:40
  Speaker 3: Maybe on the show?
• 13:41
  Speaker 2: Did anyone give you advice when you started thinking about
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: going on the show or when you signed up to
• 13:47
  Speaker 2: be on the show?
• 13:48
  Speaker 6: Hesitate, pause before you jump in with both feet? Yeah,
• 13:53
  Speaker 6: do one foot at a time. Thought, I really tried
• 13:57
  Speaker 6: to get to know who they are and what they're values. Yep.
• 14:02
  Speaker 5: And I would just kind of go off of your relationship, Susan,
• 14:07
  Speaker 5: I think you should find somebody off the bat that
• 14:11
  Speaker 5: aligns with the things that you prioritize.
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: That was the party we left together. We're goofy together.
• 14:18
  Speaker 6: Yeah, dance a sincere, we love if we talk, Yeah,
• 14:22
  Speaker 6: we communicate, we're quiet together.
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: Everything else yeah we're yeah, I'm sorry.
• 14:28
  Speaker 5: Yeah yeah, And just like going, yeah, just what do
• 14:31
  Speaker 5: you prioritize in a relationship, right, and then making sure
• 14:33
  Speaker 5: that partner that first that you're dating, aligns with those
• 14:36
  Speaker 5: things and if they don't and they show those red flags,
• 14:39
  Speaker 5: then you sail on onto the next There are plenty
• 14:41
  Speaker 5: Effiici in the SYA.
• 14:42
  Speaker 2: Totally never settle to never settle. Yeah, I would say
• 14:46
  Speaker 2: also being married for over twenty years, your relationships change
• 14:52
  Speaker 2: and you can attest to this like being married, I
• 14:55
  Speaker 2: feel like for a you know, a long time. I
• 14:58
  Speaker 2: feel like marriage change. People change in a marriage, and
• 15:02
  Speaker 2: it's about like changing those priorities, but communicating what those
• 15:06
  Speaker 2: changes are are knowing your partner enough to know what
• 15:10
  Speaker 2: you're prioritizing us at that time in your life.
• 15:12
  Speaker 3: Because when we had kids, I was like, it was different.
• 15:15
  Speaker 2: They are my priority and that's you just have to
• 15:18
  Speaker 2: accept them because.
• 15:20
  Speaker 3: They're helpless and about that.
• 15:22
  Speaker 4: That's the online I love that you're talking about kind
• 15:24
  Speaker 4: of what it looks like when you're already married, and
• 15:26
  Speaker 4: that's probably the easier place to talk from because that's
• 15:29
  Speaker 4: where you are now. I feel like I got to
• 15:32
  Speaker 4: have that place, and then I had to go backwards and.
• 15:34
  Speaker 3: Again, and I remember.
• 15:37
  Speaker 4: Being very careful not to like swipe left or swipe
• 15:42
  Speaker 4: right or whatever it is, the one that says reject
• 15:45
  Speaker 4: before you get to know the person. Found a couple
• 15:47
  Speaker 4: guys that I probably wasn't like super attracted to, but
• 15:51
  Speaker 4: I went on dates just because I kind of needed
• 15:53
  Speaker 4: the practice. And their sense of humor made them like really.
• 15:57
  Speaker 3: Really attractive, or the way they.
• 15:58
  Speaker 4: Treated me, the way they pulled my chair out and
• 16:00
  Speaker 4: made sure that I was okay getting into my car,
• 16:02
  Speaker 4: like the kind things they did. So I think dating
• 16:05
  Speaker 4: apps are doing a big disservice to a lot of
• 16:08
  Speaker 4: people that may connect differently if they were meeting in person.
• 16:12
  Speaker 4: And so don't swipe left, whatever the rejection one is,
• 16:16
  Speaker 4: don't swipe so.
• 16:17
  Speaker 5: Quickly totally people a chance, yes, personality, mate a person completely.
• 16:24
  Speaker 2: It's like love is blind. Why I feel like that's
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: so popular.
• 16:27
  Speaker 4: Because I think it's a crazy concept because they marry
• 16:30
  Speaker 4: at the end. But I do love the initial right,
• 16:33
  Speaker 4: love is blind part of it. I think you have
• 16:34
  Speaker 4: to have some kind of attraction.
• 16:38
  Speaker 2: I mean, I wouldn't do that for myself, like completely.
• 16:44
  Speaker 3: I mean, we can fix.
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: That, but but I feel like attraction is extremely high
• 16:51
  Speaker 2: on the necessities of a successful relationship.
• 16:54
  Speaker 4: Like they look more attractive when you you know, when
• 16:57
  Speaker 4: you get to know them, Like a sense.
• 16:58
  Speaker 3: Of humor so very attractible.
• 17:01
  Speaker 4: Really smart man is very attractively He's not like the
• 17:04
  Speaker 4: best looking guy in the world, like being smart, like
• 17:08
  Speaker 4: banter is really.
• 17:09
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's a humor yeah yeah, and for.
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: The chance people.
• 17:12
  Speaker 4: And I think these dating apps are really like removing
• 17:14
  Speaker 4: that whole.
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: Right, they have more situationships, if you will.
• 17:19
  Speaker 3: That's a lot of what I mean.
• 17:21
  Speaker 2: Were you ever on the dating apps since they're kind
• 17:22
  Speaker 2: of a new I was saying, I.
• 17:24
  Speaker 7: Was a little bit, Yeah, a little bit.
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: But is it like a hookup thing? Like are you
• 17:32
  Speaker 2: on Tinder because you want to hook up? Was that
• 17:35
  Speaker 2: like the general.
• 17:39
  Speaker 5: I think that is that is a thing for sure
• 17:41
  Speaker 5: with Tinder, But I do think some people genuinely take
• 17:45
  Speaker 5: it seriously. And I know there are love stories they
• 17:48
  Speaker 5: got it, But I will say. Tinder, I think is
• 17:50
  Speaker 5: notorious for having that kind of you know, REPUSI nefflicks
• 17:53
  Speaker 5: and chill, whereas I think Hinge was. I think Hinge
• 17:57
  Speaker 5: is great. It kind of it kind of gives you
• 18:00
  Speaker 5: like a brief kind of summary of the person. Do
• 18:03
  Speaker 5: they smoke, do they drink? Do they have kids?
• 18:05
  Speaker 1: And you know, answer the question exactly so you know.
• 18:08
  Speaker 3: I can answer the questions. Got it.
• 18:11
  Speaker 5: I didn't mind Hinge And there was like little blurbs
• 18:13
  Speaker 5: that kind of show a little bit of your personality
• 18:16
  Speaker 5: and does that entice you and then you have a conversation. Yes,
• 18:19
  Speaker 5: So I didn't. I I liked Hinge, but I think
• 18:22
  Speaker 5: for me, I just.
• 18:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't.
• 18:26
  Speaker 3: I don't know.
• 18:26
  Speaker 5: I did go on a couple of dates, but I
• 18:28
  Speaker 5: feel like dating culture these days is so different and
• 18:31
  Speaker 5: it's I think I was a little jaded too. I
• 18:34
  Speaker 5: was just like, are you, Like, like what are we
• 18:36
  Speaker 5: doing here? Like I'm here to actually find somebody.
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: I'm wanting so.
• 18:40
  Speaker 3: Much love to give the right person.
• 18:42
  Speaker 5: I don't want to hook up and like I said earlier,
• 18:45
  Speaker 5: I wasn't a promiscuous person like that. I didn't get
• 18:47
  Speaker 5: off on that. I really need to connect with you
• 18:49
  Speaker 5: literally so yeah, And honestly, when I when I started
• 18:53
  Speaker 5: to date, I got the call to be on the Bachelor.
• 18:57
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and so perfect time.
• 18:59
  Speaker 7: Yeah, do you want to get so lucky in so
• 19:03
  Speaker 7: many ways?
• 19:03
  Speaker 6: But and I married people for a living and most
• 19:07
  Speaker 6: of the couples young couples they met on dating.
• 19:10
  Speaker 2: Really.
• 19:11
  Speaker 3: Oh that's interesting.
• 19:12
  Speaker 2: It's like, how long have you been doing it?
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: Married years?
• 19:17
  Speaker 3: Okay?
• 19:18
  Speaker 1: Do you feel like it's changed the dating app?
• 19:21
  Speaker 2: Or do you feel like it's gotten more popular to
• 19:24
  Speaker 2: meet on a dating app? And the people definitely things
• 19:27
  Speaker 2: online these days?
• 19:28
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you're right, it's union. It's a good start.
• 19:31
  Speaker 4: I just think it shouldn't be the finish could be.
• 19:34
  Speaker 3: Just like the beginning.
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: And how about going back on after release? Like, I
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: don't want to do that.
• 19:40
  Speaker 3: It's like a job, a job, it's a job. I
• 19:44
  Speaker 3: made it. Okay.
• 19:56
  Speaker 2: I love this because I feel like the four of
• 19:58
  Speaker 2: us are kind of on the same page in terms
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: of like female empowerment and knowing yourself and loving yourself.
• 20:04
  Speaker 2: What do women need to stop putting up with in
• 20:07
  Speaker 2: terms of dating?
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: Go staying the number one? Yeah?
• 20:12
  Speaker 4: I think only communicating via the app? Yeah, And I
• 20:17
  Speaker 4: think it's that's what it feels like a job. Yeah, immediately,
• 20:21
  Speaker 4: like you need to meet in person five minutes.
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah, let's have some.
• 20:27
  Speaker 4: You should make it like a strict like I'm only
• 20:28
  Speaker 4: gonna DM for four days, right, and then after that
• 20:32
  Speaker 4: if you don't want to go out on a date
• 20:34
  Speaker 4: with me, if you don't mean person, if.
• 20:37
  Speaker 2: I don't show there's a reason you're not wanting.
• 20:40
  Speaker 3: To get in person, I don't want to.
• 20:41
  Speaker 5: Like, it's way more successful if you start dming off
• 20:43
  Speaker 5: an app to like book the date.
• 20:45
  Speaker 3: Like a SAP.
• 20:47
  Speaker 5: It's because if yeah, because if you you know, kind
• 20:49
  Speaker 5: of a conversation, it fizzles out and nothing ever happens.
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: So you know what, there's chemistry.
• 20:54
  Speaker 6: I believe in the y chemistry if it's like I
• 20:57
  Speaker 6: know within ten seconds.
• 20:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 21:00
  Speaker 4: And there's really important tests that I do on men,
• 21:02
  Speaker 4: which is really mean, but they are like and one
• 21:05
  Speaker 4: of them is how they treat the weight staff.
• 21:07
  Speaker 3: And if they're at like a or like.
• 21:10
  Speaker 4: For a glass of wine, like I'll meet. Yeah, that's
• 21:12
  Speaker 4: how they treat that bartender and how they chip and
• 21:15
  Speaker 4: like a grade.
• 21:16
  Speaker 5: Ye.
• 21:16
  Speaker 4: So like there.
• 21:17
  Speaker 2: Are easy light attendance that.
• 21:19
  Speaker 4: I can't They're the easy test that I can perform
• 21:21
  Speaker 4: on the manly, I'll know.
• 21:23
  Speaker 6: Right for me, when I went out for a meet,
• 21:26
  Speaker 6: I never called it. It's not a date. We're going
• 21:28
  Speaker 6: to meet to decide if we want to in a date.
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: Let's just get together my own way.
• 21:33
  Speaker 3: Yes, for you be surprised.
• 21:37
  Speaker 6: A lot of gentlemen would know absolutely take offense, and
• 21:41
  Speaker 6: others were, oh, that's nice, oh okay, noted.
• 21:49
  Speaker 2: You know what I'm worried about is the generation of
• 21:51
  Speaker 2: my daughter.
• 21:52
  Speaker 3: So she's seventeen.
• 21:53
  Speaker 2: They communicate via Snapchat and they are that's all they do. Like,
• 21:57
  Speaker 2: you know, my daughter is dating. She has boyfriend and
• 22:00
  Speaker 2: they've been together like a year and a half. And yes,
• 22:03
  Speaker 2: they get together and they go on dates and they're
• 22:06
  Speaker 2: you know, dates with friends whatever. But I feel like
• 22:09
  Speaker 2: their generation that is, you know, going to be in
• 22:11
  Speaker 2: college soon and on their own soon, is so on
• 22:15
  Speaker 2: snap that it's it's too bad. They need to be
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: in person. Yeah, like actually get off your phone, like
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: make it a rule. I don't know, like when you're together,
• 22:27
  Speaker 2: put your phones together and get off.
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: I love that you.
• 22:31
  Speaker 5: Said that, because lately Zach and I will obviously have
• 22:35
  Speaker 5: our date night and we'll leave our phones in the
• 22:38
  Speaker 5: car for you anytime after dinner. We'll cook together and
• 22:41
  Speaker 5: we'll go on a walk right after dinner and leave
• 22:43
  Speaker 5: our phones out.
• 22:44
  Speaker 3: Yeah, who's mine.
• 22:46
  Speaker 5: It's a great idea, a great idea on board, like
• 22:49
  Speaker 5: he's not even like, wait, what's.
• 22:52
  Speaker 2: So until you have kids? That is good?
• 22:58
  Speaker 3: All right?
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: Thank you amazing, thank you, and thank you for listening
• 23:03
  Speaker 2: to almost famous. Will you accept this advice?