Latest / Life Will Be the Death of Me with Chelsea Handler / Crackers with Yamaneika Saunders

Transcript

Crackers with Yamaneika Saunders · Life Will Be the Death of Me with Chelsea Handler

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hey there, it's Catherine. Just a little note about the
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: audio quality and the intro. We had Chelsea calling in
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: from our remote location, so you may notice a little
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: bit of a difference in the audio quality just for
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: the intro. We were back in studio for the recording
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: of this episode. Just wanted to let you know, enjoy
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: the episode.
• 0:16
  Speaker 2: Hi Catherine, Hi Chelsea.
• 0:19
  Speaker 3: Hi?
• 0:19
  Speaker 4: Has it going?
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: He's it going? Girl?
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: You know what, it's going great. I'm having an easy summer,
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: so that's pretty good.
• 0:26
  Speaker 5: How about you.
• 0:26
  Speaker 2: What are you up to? Well, I'm dealing.
• 0:28
  Speaker 6: My foot is getting bettery damn.
• 0:30
  Speaker 4: Now I'm now back in a sneaker and on Monday
• 0:33
  Speaker 4: they X ray and may foot to make sure it's
• 0:34
  Speaker 4: all healed.
• 0:35
  Speaker 6: And then I can start working out again. Yeah, how
• 0:39
  Speaker 6: I love that.
• 0:42
  Speaker 7: Back to Ben Bruno.
• 0:43
  Speaker 6: Yeah, back to Ben Bruno. He calls it. He texts
• 0:45
  Speaker 6: me every day going how are you?
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: How are you?
• 0:47
  Speaker 6: And I'm like, just fucking shut up. I'll see you
• 0:50
  Speaker 6: when I see you.
• 0:51
  Speaker 4: But I got a massive CO two laser on my
• 0:54
  Speaker 4: face also, which my face feels like somebody took sandpaper
• 0:59
  Speaker 4: to it, Like it still feels that way, and it's
• 1:01
  Speaker 4: been like a week and a half.
• 1:03
  Speaker 6: So I'm hoping that starts to calm down and my.
• 1:05
  Speaker 4: Son's almost all gone, but I still am swollen from that.
• 1:09
  Speaker 4: You should have seen the day that I took pictures
• 1:11
  Speaker 4: and then I deleted them all from my phone because
• 1:13
  Speaker 4: I'm like, oh god, this is gonna end up with
• 1:15
  Speaker 4: in some sort of Jeffrey Epstein's story.
• 1:17
  Speaker 7: Yeah, you don't need that going wide.
• 1:19
  Speaker 6: Exactly.
• 1:20
  Speaker 7: Have you been in your h what's the chamber called?
• 1:23
  Speaker 3: Have you been? Oh?
• 1:23
  Speaker 6: Yeah, hyperbaric? Every day I'm in my hyperbaric.
• 1:26
  Speaker 4: I'm staying at my friend Kat's house until my house
• 1:28
  Speaker 4: new finished date is August twenty second, which I won't
• 1:31
  Speaker 4: even be here for, so that works out perfectly great.
• 1:34
  Speaker 4: As usual, I'm taking my span, I'm taking advantage of
• 1:37
  Speaker 4: all this time. Yesterday I finished a fucking puzzle. I
• 1:40
  Speaker 4: did an actual puzzle. I posted it on Instagram because
• 1:45
  Speaker 4: I don't think I've ever done a puzzle in my
• 1:47
  Speaker 4: life and completed it.
• 1:48
  Speaker 7: It's kind of nice, is it?
• 1:50
  Speaker 6: I know it's not it, I guess it is.
• 1:52
  Speaker 2: I mean it wasn't.
• 1:53
  Speaker 4: It's not fun. I like activities that are fun, and
• 1:56
  Speaker 4: that wasn't fun. That was just like, oh, my god,
• 1:59
  Speaker 4: I'm so bored. I've read three books. Oh you know
• 2:01
  Speaker 4: what I wanted to mention when we were doing our
• 2:03
  Speaker 4: book round up, I totally forgot right exactly.
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: We did a book round up episode for everybody. It's
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: a minisode and so that'll come out next Friday, August.
• 2:11
  Speaker 8: Dave.
• 2:11
  Speaker 4: I read a fucking awesome book and it's it's called
• 2:15
  Speaker 4: Red Notice by Bill Browder, who's like financial guy that
• 2:18
  Speaker 4: invested in Russia after they got rid of communism so
• 2:23
  Speaker 4: to speak, and then the public everything went public, like
• 2:27
  Speaker 4: all their government agencies went public, and so he went
• 2:29
  Speaker 4: in and saw a huge opportunity for investment. And it's
• 2:32
  Speaker 4: all about how corrupt and crazy Russia is. People die,
• 2:37
  Speaker 4: and this is like a venture capitalist kind of investment
• 2:39
  Speaker 4: banker guy, not a VC and more of a banker
• 2:42
  Speaker 4: like investment guy, but nay, billions of dollars in Russia.
• 2:45
  Speaker 4: And then they wanted him out and then they realized
• 2:48
  Speaker 4: that he was kind of like working the system but legally,
• 2:51
  Speaker 4: and it's all about.
• 2:52
  Speaker 6: It's a fascinating read.
• 2:54
  Speaker 4: And I forgot to mention that I was thinking of
• 2:56
  Speaker 4: that book that if you're like into that kind of thing,
• 2:59
  Speaker 4: WI I'm into I send it to my Russian nephew
• 3:02
  Speaker 4: so he can step defending Russian.
• 3:05
  Speaker 7: Perfect perfect, So it works in the family too. Yeah, excellent.
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: I mean, obviously I've sent you like twenty five books
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: to read for the podcast, so.
• 3:13
  Speaker 6: I know so many. But our guest is one of
• 3:15
  Speaker 6: my favorite people. You guys.
• 3:17
  Speaker 4: She opens for me in Vegas. She's opening for me
• 3:19
  Speaker 4: again this August thirtieth. My next gig in Vegas. My
• 3:22
  Speaker 4: next night at the Cosmo was August thirtieth, so she'll
• 3:25
  Speaker 4: be my opener. If you haven't seen her perform, you
• 3:27
  Speaker 4: need to. She's hilarious. Also, I added a second show
• 3:31
  Speaker 4: in West Hampton, so I'm doing two nights in West Hampton,
• 3:34
  Speaker 4: Hampton in August August twenty first, which is sold out,
• 3:37
  Speaker 4: and then August twenty second. Yeah, so please welcome a.
• 3:41
  Speaker 6: Comedian, hopefully a new podcaster. She's had her own radio show.
• 3:47
  Speaker 6: She is won a hot fucking mess Y'aminika Saunders.
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: You're still sweating from last night. You were sweating last
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: night too. Are you going through Perry menopause?
• 3:58
  Speaker 5: Listen, bitch, I want the away on a train.
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: Well, whose fucking fault is that?
• 4:02
  Speaker 5: Don't you live here?
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: You don't know how to get on a train. No,
• 4:06
  Speaker 2: you are, okay. Yaminika just walked in. She smells like
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: marijuana as usual.
• 4:12
  Speaker 5: I have a video. Yeah, I could just put on
• 4:17
  Speaker 5: on the ground. Yeah.
• 4:19
  Speaker 2: Just throw all her stuff on the floor.
• 4:20
  Speaker 5: Please. Right here is perfect. I just hit a little
• 4:24
  Speaker 5: bit of something before I came up here. Don't do this? Yeah,
• 4:28
  Speaker 5: thank you?
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: There here she comes. One of your boobs is on
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: the other side. What's going on? What happened after I
• 4:34
  Speaker 2: left last night? Okay? First of all, Yaminica Saunders is
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: on the podcast today. She's a very very special guest.
• 4:41
  Speaker 5: I'm to take this off.
• 4:42
  Speaker 2: Oh god, Catherine, have you met Yama yet? I have?
• 4:47
  Speaker 7: Not only through her instagram?
• 4:51
  Speaker 2: Live Hold on a second, one second?
• 4:53
  Speaker 7: Getting under yes this outfit?
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: Yes please okay, Hi, Yaminica, sit down, please, let's go.
• 5:01
  Speaker 2: Let's go. You have lipstick on your teeth? Do you
• 5:03
  Speaker 2: want to I don't care.
• 5:04
  Speaker 5: I don't give a fuck anymore.
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: Okay, I'm trying to help you. Yeah you can curse.
• 5:08
  Speaker 5: Okay, Hello, everybody, welcome to my show.
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: I am Anina.
• 5:13
  Speaker 5: Hi, my love. You're so cute.
• 5:16
  Speaker 7: Oh, thank you?
• 5:17
  Speaker 5: And skin this.
• 5:19
  Speaker 3: Is the type of white I like, why can't you
• 5:20
  Speaker 3: get to that type of porcelain.
• 5:22
  Speaker 2: You don't like my First of all, you have fucking
• 5:24
  Speaker 2: lipstick all over your face and your teeth. Yeah, look
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: at yourself.
• 5:28
  Speaker 5: Let me see, I see you mile, This is you
• 5:31
  Speaker 5: self centered bitch.
• 5:33
  Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, let me recap what happened last night. We
• 5:37
  Speaker 2: went to dinner. It was supposed to be an innocent
• 5:40
  Speaker 2: in her.
• 5:40
  Speaker 3: It wasn't innocent in to UK, and you messed everything up.
• 5:45
  Speaker 3: I was completely sane and sober before you showed up,
• 5:48
  Speaker 3: and then two minutes after you arrived, I was like,
• 5:51
  Speaker 3: oh wait, did this bitch put some acid in my bag? No?
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: I didn't bring any drugs. I didn't have any drugs.
• 5:58
  Speaker 5: She brought to Australia. Your lesbians, and.
• 6:02
  Speaker 2: One is a lesbian? I think I don't know the
• 6:05
  Speaker 2: other one is a lesbian?
• 6:06
  Speaker 3: Baba, No no, no, no, no, definitely if she ain't a lesbian,
• 6:09
  Speaker 3: she need to talk to somebody, right, okayed the stylist immediately,
• 6:13
  Speaker 3: and no dist because I don't want to hear the lesbians.
• 6:15
  Speaker 3: What you mean?
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: We be talking about the stilence when you're in a tank.
• 6:19
  Speaker 3: Because I'm forty, you know, and a grown wiry men
• 6:23
  Speaker 3: A pause. I'm hot and I'm cold, so the part
• 6:26
  Speaker 3: of me that's cold got tights on.
• 6:28
  Speaker 2: Sorry that her voice is going out. She's standing up
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: and demonstrating sound like no, no, no, I have to
• 6:35
  Speaker 2: explain listeners, this is at iHeart.
• 6:37
  Speaker 3: You ain't got the microphones to pick up motherfuckers when
• 6:39
  Speaker 3: they go all over the place.
• 6:41
  Speaker 5: You need to talk to the budgeting people. Did you
• 6:44
  Speaker 5: tell them you white? Or was that currency up?
• 6:46
  Speaker 2: Now they now.
• 6:47
  Speaker 5: What is everybody black? Welcome to the club? Whitey.
• 6:53
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Whenever I complained about anything political, she's like, bitches,
• 6:56
  Speaker 2: this is on fucking you and you are you and
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: you're a fucking white bitch. Friends who I mean? I
• 7:02
  Speaker 2: didn't vote for Donald Trump, obviously, but.
• 7:05
  Speaker 3: You know the thing about it, No, no, no, yes you
• 7:08
  Speaker 3: are because no, no, no, not you not, but you are.
• 7:10
  Speaker 3: Let me tell you why, Chelsea. For some reason, Chelsea
• 7:13
  Speaker 3: definitely the white woman to get it. But then she
• 7:15
  Speaker 3: hang around a flock of white bitches that don't. So
• 7:17
  Speaker 3: if I tell her she ain't shit, I want her
• 7:19
  Speaker 3: to tell it to the other white bitches that's around
• 7:22
  Speaker 3: her to day. Ain't ship because she ain't ship, so
• 7:24
  Speaker 3: that they become ship because now I keep telling her
• 7:27
  Speaker 3: to day, ain't ship through her.
• 7:28
  Speaker 2: The first of all, the white bitches I hang out
• 7:30
  Speaker 2: with are all on the same team as I am.
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: So what team is that team? And fuck it, what
• 7:34
  Speaker 2: do you mean we're on the same team. We're not
• 7:37
  Speaker 2: on fucking Donald Trump's team. We're on the No no, no, no, no, no, no,
• 7:41
  Speaker 2: no no.
• 7:42
  Speaker 3: I don't think they're with Donald Trump team. I do
• 7:44
  Speaker 3: think that they're white as hell. Yeah team all of that.
• 7:47
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, But a lot of white people can't
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: helping white I mean most of it.
• 7:52
  Speaker 5: Have you tried?
• 7:53
  Speaker 2: Yah ya?
• 7:54
  Speaker 3: Men are trying to help white women every day. Bring
• 7:56
  Speaker 3: on more mocha latto children. So go talk to a
• 7:59
  Speaker 3: black man. Have you talked you a black senator lately
• 8:01
  Speaker 3: and asked him?
• 8:02
  Speaker 2: We have a black senator? Do you? I don't, do
• 8:05
  Speaker 2: you show? Are you sure? I know I don't have
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: a black seven?
• 8:07
  Speaker 3: Can somebody? I hope it's I hope the senator is
• 8:09
  Speaker 3: black and that you don't.
• 8:10
  Speaker 2: Know California, I do not have a black senator in Maryland?
• 8:15
  Speaker 2: Are in Maryland? The governor?
• 8:16
  Speaker 5: What are you?
• 8:17
  Speaker 2: What are you talking about? She's from Maryland? Actually, I just.
• 8:22
  Speaker 3: Maryland where they sent that motherfucker back to El Salad.
• 8:27
  Speaker 3: I tell you, white men doing whatever, How the fuck
• 8:30
  Speaker 3: do you send a motherfucker who's not even ol Salvadorian
• 8:35
  Speaker 3: to Al Salvador and then motherfucker's from Maryland?
• 8:40
  Speaker 5: How are we doing this? Hello? White people? Is this
• 8:43
  Speaker 5: thing on? Is this what you voted.
• 8:45
  Speaker 3: For when y'all thought niggas was gonna be the one
• 8:47
  Speaker 3: down there suffering the most? And look at you, huh,
• 8:50
  Speaker 3: look at you? Now use a nigga too. That's my
• 8:53
  Speaker 3: new my current specialist called White Nigga. You can get
• 8:56
  Speaker 3: it on YouTube. It is perfect for this because everything
• 9:01
  Speaker 3: that I talk about in my special White Nigga is
• 9:03
  Speaker 3: happening right now. And if you are a white nigga,
• 9:05
  Speaker 3: go listen to it. And I'm telling you right now,
• 9:07
  Speaker 3: the second part is about white bitches. White women take
• 9:11
  Speaker 3: responsibility for the shit that you did. Shut the fuck
• 9:14
  Speaker 3: up and bend over now, bitch, because it's Handsmaid's tail, right,
• 9:18
  Speaker 3: it's a Handsmaids saal. I never watched one fucking episode
• 9:21
  Speaker 3: of that thing, but by the cover, I can tell
• 9:23
  Speaker 3: you that white women gonna look like that shit by
• 9:25
  Speaker 3: next Tuesday at five thirty.
• 9:27
  Speaker 5: Okay, bitch, welcome to the club.
• 9:29
  Speaker 3: And I'm a big black bitch with big greasy titties
• 9:32
  Speaker 3: and I'm gonna go straight in that kitchen, honey, and
• 9:34
  Speaker 3: I'm gonna make some flapjacks and I'm telling and I'm
• 9:37
  Speaker 3: gonna get it. Listen me right, I'm going in there.
• 9:41
  Speaker 3: Chelsea going in there too. You know, if I gotta
• 9:44
  Speaker 3: work underneath the white woman, I need Chelsea. Were gonna
• 9:46
  Speaker 3: have some fun, you know what I'm saying. At night
• 9:48
  Speaker 3: when they tell all the slaves to go to sleep,
• 9:50
  Speaker 3: and then Chelsea say, get undereath my bed, I'm gonna
• 9:52
  Speaker 3: put you in a little drawer here and then I'm
• 9:53
  Speaker 3: gonna go in there. Hopefully I can fit. You know,
• 9:55
  Speaker 3: I'm heavy set. And then when Massa go to sleep,
• 9:58
  Speaker 3: she's gonna open the drawer and then we're gonna have
• 10:00
  Speaker 3: like a little American girl.
• 10:01
  Speaker 2: No, okay, I appreciate it. Okay, I understand, do you?
• 10:10
  Speaker 3: No? I want people to slow sweet chair, you can
• 10:12
  Speaker 3: be on to pick that cuton anyway.
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: This is Yaminika. She has a special out on YouTube
• 10:19
  Speaker 2: that I would encourage every single person to watch because
• 10:22
  Speaker 2: it's very women. I know you like a lot of
• 10:26
  Speaker 2: us are Democrats, and we vote for the right right things.
• 10:30
  Speaker 2: But I think what I've learned from all of my
• 10:34
  Speaker 2: black sisters is how disappointed they are in constantly showing
• 10:39
  Speaker 2: up and showing up for election after election, fighting the
• 10:42
  Speaker 2: good fight, fighting the good fight, and yet half of
• 10:45
  Speaker 2: the white women in this country don't seem to show up.
• 10:47
  Speaker 2: They don't seem to and then they vote for somebody
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: like this fucking asshole. And now we're living in this
• 10:52
  Speaker 2: hell which unveils a new hell every single day. So
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: it's a great learning and teaching special for all of
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: us who are are not as enlightened as we want
• 11:01
  Speaker 2: to be about actually the dynamic between people of color
• 11:04
  Speaker 2: and women of color and what they have done for
• 11:06
  Speaker 2: this country versus what white women have done for this country.
• 11:10
  Speaker 5: Wow, isn't that beautiful? Is every now and then you
• 11:12
  Speaker 5: really get it.
• 11:14
  Speaker 2: Let's talk about what happened last night?
• 11:16
  Speaker 5: And I like her.
• 11:17
  Speaker 2: I know you love me, and you can't help. There's
• 11:19
  Speaker 2: nothing you can do about it, there's nothing. You're in
• 11:21
  Speaker 2: love with me. Actually, you get googly out of you
• 11:26
  Speaker 2: see me, and you're.
• 11:27
  Speaker 3: Just yesterday, I don't remember it was warm right now,
• 11:30
  Speaker 3: I was wrong about that.
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: You loved it, loved.
• 11:34
  Speaker 5: That your hands will on my warm vagina.
• 11:36
  Speaker 2: No, they weren't on your vagina.
• 11:38
  Speaker 5: And you're a white women's vagina's warm.
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: No, I mean yeah, usually they're not cold. They're not cold.
• 11:45
  Speaker 2: I mean vagina's are typically hot. Yeah, you're horny, your horny,
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: And she still thinks she's having a baby. I'm trying
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: to convince her that that's not the right move you
• 11:54
  Speaker 2: want to bring. But think about it, bringing a baby
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: into this world. Think about it. Is that a nice
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: thing to do to a baby?
• 11:59
  Speaker 3: You know what, I'm gonna say this. You know what,
• 12:01
  Speaker 3: here's another teaching moment through babies. When you were talking
• 12:05
  Speaker 3: about how black women feel right about how white women
• 12:10
  Speaker 3: continuously don't show up the way they ask us to
• 12:12
  Speaker 3: show up for them. Right, Yes, here's the real reality.
• 12:16
  Speaker 3: Nobody because people are like, well, it's my you know,
• 12:18
  Speaker 3: I'm thinking about myself. I feel nobody has a problem
• 12:21
  Speaker 3: right with white women going, hey, I like to have
• 12:24
  Speaker 3: a great life. Yeah, I'd like to vote for things
• 12:26
  Speaker 3: that are in my interest That's totally fine. The problem
• 12:29
  Speaker 3: is when the things that are in your interests and
• 12:31
  Speaker 3: that are gonna help you are gonna disenfranchise and disadvantage somebody.
• 12:35
  Speaker 5: Else, and you still vote for it.
• 12:38
  Speaker 3: That's what makes you catch you next Tuesday, right on
• 12:41
  Speaker 3: Wednesday because to day Wednesday right or is it Thursday?
• 12:44
  Speaker 5: Still current?
• 12:46
  Speaker 3: So the reality is do what you want, be who
• 12:49
  Speaker 3: you want, but think about the repercussions of what your
• 12:53
  Speaker 3: space and taking up space in the world looks like
• 12:55
  Speaker 3: for everybody else. So in terms of wanting a child, yeah,
• 12:59
  Speaker 3: I do think that it is very selfish of me. Right,
• 13:01
  Speaker 3: I'm forty six necessarily, Well, I just want to say,
• 13:04
  Speaker 3: just to be aware, I am forty six by the
• 13:07
  Speaker 3: time I'm ready. I told you say maybe forty eight.
• 13:08
  Speaker 3: Now I'm moved at to fifty. You know, I never
• 13:10
  Speaker 3: know when we're ready. I've come from a family.
• 13:12
  Speaker 2: That definitely not ready. Now, I just want to put
• 13:14
  Speaker 2: that out there. I've traveled with you, I've been on there.
• 13:17
  Speaker 2: You are not ready to have a baby. So, okay,
• 13:19
  Speaker 2: you're excellent, You're a giant baby. Okay. You you can't
• 13:24
  Speaker 2: show up anywhere on time without fucking things hanging out
• 13:28
  Speaker 2: of your bags, without fucking wigs and hair. I mean,
• 13:31
  Speaker 2: you don't even know what the fuck is going to happen.
• 13:34
  Speaker 2: Sometimes we have to drop her off on the we
• 13:35
  Speaker 2: pick her up and she's on the side of the
• 13:37
  Speaker 2: road like a street walker.
• 13:39
  Speaker 5: She that's true. Listen.
• 13:43
  Speaker 3: I in terms of the baby, oh god, I want
• 13:48
  Speaker 3: the baby, but I do I am thinking realistically, like
• 13:52
  Speaker 3: also with as old as I am, you know, no
• 13:54
  Speaker 3: disrespect that women can have babies, you know, but you know,
• 13:58
  Speaker 3: my life expectancy right for the child, right is like
• 14:02
  Speaker 3: my kids, I'm going to see them to the twenty
• 14:03
  Speaker 3: five maybe twenty six, you know, so I don't know.
• 14:07
  Speaker 5: I it is scary.
• 14:08
  Speaker 2: And also your schedule, your stand up. You're out every night,
• 14:11
  Speaker 2: you're doing stand up all the time.
• 14:12
  Speaker 5: I could see my kid until thirty at this point.
• 14:14
  Speaker 2: Right, it depends how long?
• 14:16
  Speaker 5: Yeah, thirty yeah, thirty five maybe, you know.
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: Okay, anyway, we'll put a pin in the baby thing, okay,
• 14:22
  Speaker 2: because I don't think I'm gonna work hard to prevent
• 14:26
  Speaker 2: it from happening. I'm going to try to work hard
• 14:29
  Speaker 2: to convince you not to have it. I think I
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: will well, I will end up come mothering the baby.
• 14:34
  Speaker 2: And that's also why I want you to have one,
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: because I don't have the fucking bandwidth Okay, last night
• 14:39
  Speaker 2: I went to dinner. Where were we went to Harlem.
• 14:42
  Speaker 3: We went to the We were in the Apollo, inside
• 14:44
  Speaker 3: the Apollo. The Apollo, Yeah it was, but they've it's
• 14:48
  Speaker 3: kind of gutted out now so but it's also a hotel.
• 14:50
  Speaker 3: It's like a whole bunch of stuff going on there.
• 14:52
  Speaker 3: I thought they still have the theater at the Apollo.
• 14:54
  Speaker 3: They do, yeah, but then there's like another But where
• 14:56
  Speaker 3: we went was the Victoria Oside Restaurant.
• 14:59
  Speaker 2: That was nice. That was yeah, I would like that
• 15:00
  Speaker 2: chef he was.
• 15:01
  Speaker 5: He was amazing.
• 15:03
  Speaker 2: And I had grilled oysters, my favorite. I had two
• 15:05
  Speaker 2: orders of grilled oysters. That's how fucking good.
• 15:07
  Speaker 3: They He was trying to have sex with me, and
• 15:09
  Speaker 3: I said, take it easy on those oysters.
• 15:12
  Speaker 5: I know how you get. Yeah, anyway, I came.
• 15:15
  Speaker 2: I showed up with some friends to lesbians and then
• 15:18
  Speaker 2: another friend of mine, another homosexual friend of mine.
• 15:21
  Speaker 3: No dick for me, you always come with no nothing
• 15:23
  Speaker 3: for me. She well, listen, I want a few pieces
• 15:26
  Speaker 3: of dick my driver.
• 15:27
  Speaker 2: I have a driver.
• 15:28
  Speaker 5: No, don't do that.
• 15:29
  Speaker 2: Well, no, I'm gonna. I'm gonna. Because he was sexually asserted,
• 15:32
  Speaker 2: it's not Okay, my driver rock I love him. Okay, yes,
• 15:37
  Speaker 2: he don't do that. Last night last night, Rafa said, hey,
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: can someone bring me a coffee outside? Because he was outside.
• 15:43
  Speaker 2: Guess what? And yeah, Yah came over and said, don't
• 15:45
  Speaker 2: let Yama bring him the coffee because she'll sexually, she'll
• 15:48
  Speaker 2: she'll hit on him. I said, I know, we've already been.
• 15:51
  Speaker 5: The man is married.
• 15:52
  Speaker 2: Rafa is scared of Yama. Yes he is married. No,
• 15:55
  Speaker 2: he loves you, but I love him. I would never
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: do this, but no, no, no, no, you see the thing
• 15:59
  Speaker 2: is way wait, this is the story.
• 16:02
  Speaker 5: I'm not sure Haras is being nice.
• 16:04
  Speaker 2: Now. Remember who's talking Kelsey everywhere we go?
• 16:06
  Speaker 5: Oh she's being nice. He must want to fuck him.
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: Everywhere we go, wherever we go, and she's we've been
• 16:12
  Speaker 2: on the road together many times. She hits on either
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: the security guard, he's the driver, the guy, remember from Houston.
• 16:20
  Speaker 5: I got the picture.
• 16:20
  Speaker 2: I got the picture with her, I know, but he
• 16:23
  Speaker 2: wanted the picture with you.
• 16:23
  Speaker 5: I know he took a picture.
• 16:24
  Speaker 3: No, you sent me the picture of you and him
• 16:26
  Speaker 3: together like a bitch, But I still use it.
• 16:27
  Speaker 5: The Master debate.
• 16:30
  Speaker 2: She was hitting so so Rafa.
• 16:32
  Speaker 3: One night I Rob just cropped Chelsea out of his
• 16:35
  Speaker 3: Sometimes I don't have time to crop her out.
• 16:36
  Speaker 5: Ready to go.
• 16:38
  Speaker 2: Who is a married man and has a family. She
• 16:42
  Speaker 2: she he drove. He drove Yama home one night when
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: we were out up to shenan Against in New York City.
• 16:47
  Speaker 2: He dropped me off at my hotel and then he
• 16:49
  Speaker 2: dropped Yama off and I said, Rafa, if she makes
• 16:52
  Speaker 2: you uncomfortable, it's okay to be firm with her. You know,
• 16:56
  Speaker 2: you're a married man. And the next morning when I
• 16:59
  Speaker 2: saw him, he was trying to be a gentleman about it,
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: but he said, she's very aggressive. He said, she's very aggressive.
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: So he she was pressuring my driver to fornicate with her.
• 17:09
  Speaker 2: But I've seen you do it to almost anything. But
• 17:14
  Speaker 2: in New Orleans. Remember at the at the at the
• 17:17
  Speaker 2: restaurant with Amy we went to New Orleans. Yeah, and
• 17:20
  Speaker 2: the waiter, oh, you guys gave him my phone, Amy,
• 17:23
  Speaker 2: Amy Schumer gave him your phone number. She did that
• 17:25
  Speaker 2: was nice of her. And did you hear from him?
• 17:32
  Speaker 5: Wait?
• 17:34
  Speaker 2: Track, you'll stay on track, because okay. So then we
• 17:38
  Speaker 2: go to dinner last night and then she has like
• 17:40
  Speaker 2: three friends there. Two guys there right, three. How many
• 17:44
  Speaker 2: people were we? It just kept getting bigger and bigger
• 17:46
  Speaker 2: and bigger.
• 17:46
  Speaker 5: And then I turned somebody was there?
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: Yes, And then I thought these two people were with
• 17:53
  Speaker 2: you guys, and they weren't, so I just added them
• 17:56
  Speaker 2: to our group. I was random. One was a French
• 18:00
  Speaker 2: woman and this other woman who was she was funny,
• 18:03
  Speaker 2: so I mean she no, no, no, I know her? Oh
• 18:05
  Speaker 2: you did, because yeah, yeah, I was like, who the
• 18:07
  Speaker 2: fuck are these two?
• 18:07
  Speaker 5: They were at the house.
• 18:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah, they came to the house.
• 18:09
  Speaker 5: No, no, no, no, that's what my friend's wife.
• 18:12
  Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, yea, yeah.
• 18:13
  Speaker 5: Yeah, yea, yeah, no, no, no, no, no.
• 18:15
  Speaker 3: I knew the French woman, we didn't know. No, she's Argentinian, okay, yeah,
• 18:18
  Speaker 3: and we didn't know her.
• 18:19
  Speaker 5: But she wanted.
• 18:20
  Speaker 2: Smoking, so I thought she was French.
• 18:21
  Speaker 5: Yea, yeah, yeah yeah. She had to get the cigarettes
• 18:23
  Speaker 5: from France though, because of the tarifs.
• 18:25
  Speaker 2: But so we go back to uh, we go back
• 18:27
  Speaker 2: to U Yama's house and we're smoking weed and whatever else.
• 18:31
  Speaker 2: But Yama decides to disrobe. There's about us over there, shirt.
• 18:34
  Speaker 5: Off, I'm in perimenopause. It's hot.
• 18:37
  Speaker 2: Okay, well, we have to get you estrogen and progesterone.
• 18:39
  Speaker 5: Please.
• 18:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 18:41
  Speaker 3: Nobody in my apartment wanted my vagina, not even the lesbians,
• 18:45
  Speaker 3: So that's why it was okay for me to take
• 18:46
  Speaker 3: my shirt off.
• 18:47
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 18:47
  Speaker 2: But yeah, yeah, I have a video that I'm probably
• 18:49
  Speaker 2: gonna post post it.
• 18:51
  Speaker 3: No no, no, no, make sure AI my stomach now because
• 18:53
  Speaker 3: I didn't.
• 18:54
  Speaker 5: I thought I was a lot fitit than that. Do
• 18:55
  Speaker 5: me a favor.
• 18:56
  Speaker 3: You want to go with me to talk to my
• 18:57
  Speaker 3: drug guy after this about what gover his house?
• 19:00
  Speaker 5: Only smoke out and have some drugs.
• 19:02
  Speaker 2: I can't. I have to get a mammogram. You let
• 19:05
  Speaker 2: me go, but you get a mamogram to get You
• 19:06
  Speaker 2: want to get a mamogram with me?
• 19:08
  Speaker 5: Can you add me?
• 19:09
  Speaker 2: I don't think that's how it works, but I would
• 19:11
  Speaker 2: love to try your name. I mean I could, but
• 19:15
  Speaker 2: this isn't my regular hospital.
• 19:17
  Speaker 5: Were you just going around putting your titties in other hospital? Yeah?
• 19:19
  Speaker 2: Because because I just found something in my shoulder and
• 19:22
  Speaker 2: I just want to make sure I get an ultrasound.
• 19:24
  Speaker 2: Not a lot, bitch.
• 19:25
  Speaker 3: You ain't got time to be having nothing, bitch, I
• 19:27
  Speaker 3: got to ride your coat tail. I want I want
• 19:31
  Speaker 3: you better get your name on the Prayer List, bitch,
• 19:33
  Speaker 3: you better ask the Lord removie.
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: It's not anything serious. I'm sure it's actually gone now.
• 19:37
  Speaker 5: I just want to Yeah, I'll yell it out.
• 19:40
  Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, anyway, you know, mammogran with me, bitch, I'll
• 19:42
  Speaker 3: cut it off, but yeah.
• 19:43
  Speaker 2: I mean you could probably come with me and squeeze
• 19:46
  Speaker 2: your way in. I mean, do you have a Yeah,
• 19:48
  Speaker 2: have you ever? Have you had a mano Graham recently?
• 19:50
  Speaker 2: You have to have one every year, you know that, right?
• 19:52
  Speaker 5: Yeah, No, I've had.
• 19:53
  Speaker 2: I'm with those titties. I can't even imagine what you must.
• 19:56
  Speaker 3: Go gotten the same lady three times and she remembers my.
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah, well they're hard to forget. I mean they're massive.
• 20:03
  Speaker 3: But I didn't know, but I was like, I didn't
• 20:05
  Speaker 3: I don't want to ask. The one was like, you know,
• 20:07
  Speaker 3: is it appropriate right to be like are you gay? Yeah?
• 20:09
  Speaker 2: It is inappropriate to.
• 20:10
  Speaker 3: Say, I mean, but I'm like, I wanted to know
• 20:12
  Speaker 3: because like maybe she I was turning her on?
• 20:14
  Speaker 2: Uh huh?
• 20:15
  Speaker 3: But what if I asked her that and she wasn't gay?
• 20:17
  Speaker 3: It's like, did I look like I'm harassing her?
• 20:20
  Speaker 2: So then we were supposed to go dancing last.
• 20:22
  Speaker 5: Night, and we're going to go to somebody nowhere is.
• 20:25
  Speaker 2: We were going to go dancing. But what happened when
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: we got back to Yaminika's was that we ended up
• 20:29
  Speaker 2: staying there for about an hour and everyone was so stoned.
• 20:33
  Speaker 2: I was stoned. That was great.
• 20:34
  Speaker 5: We had so many joints in rotation.
• 20:36
  Speaker 2: I know, it was really fun. It was really fun.
• 20:38
  Speaker 2: But at a certain point, you know, I check out,
• 20:40
  Speaker 2: and then it was at around eleven o'clock. I was like,
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: it's time to go home. So I didn't go dancing.
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: Did you go dancing?
• 20:46
  Speaker 5: No? But I went.
• 20:47
  Speaker 3: I went to Sherry's after, Oh you did, and we
• 20:49
  Speaker 3: played spades Sherry Shepherd?
• 20:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, at her house? Or did you go back to
• 20:53
  Speaker 2: the okay?
• 20:53
  Speaker 5: Yeah, her house?
• 20:54
  Speaker 3: And then I went home and then you know, some
• 20:56
  Speaker 3: of our friends got high and did somebody had stayed
• 20:58
  Speaker 3: my house tonight? Yes?
• 21:00
  Speaker 2: Night?
• 21:00
  Speaker 5: Oh?
• 21:00
  Speaker 2: Really a man? But did you did you have sex?
• 21:06
  Speaker 2: She has two cats at her house, so the.
• 21:08
  Speaker 5: Cat they have to know when a man's coming over.
• 21:11
  Speaker 5: They got to prepare her.
• 21:11
  Speaker 2: She was looking for her cats for about forty minutes
• 21:14
  Speaker 2: when we got there. It's not that big of an apartment.
• 21:17
  Speaker 3: No, no, no, no, no, my cats. I've trained him not
• 21:19
  Speaker 3: to trust white people. So more than one white person
• 21:21
  Speaker 3: walking the door, they got to go.
• 21:22
  Speaker 2: The cats came the couch.
• 21:24
  Speaker 5: They was going somewhere looking for freedom.
• 21:26
  Speaker 2: The cat came out from out of the couch and
• 21:28
  Speaker 2: was running and I'm not exaggerating sixty miles an hour
• 21:31
  Speaker 2: into the kitchen. I was like, what the fuck was that?
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: And she's like, oh, that's what's his name? Yeah, he was.
• 21:39
  Speaker 3: Like he was He said, no, no, no, he you know,
• 21:42
  Speaker 3: he heard he heard a lot of passive aggression and
• 21:46
  Speaker 3: not taking accountability in the apartment. So he had to
• 21:48
  Speaker 3: go and you know, make sure his NAACP CAT card
• 21:52
  Speaker 3: was activated.
• 21:54
  Speaker 2: So with regard moving back to the political situation here,
• 21:57
  Speaker 2: because what's going on here? How are you feeling these
• 22:00
  Speaker 2: days about everything that's going on? Just America kind of
• 22:03
  Speaker 2: got what it deserves. Is that where you are are?
• 22:06
  Speaker 3: You know, everybody make a big deal. Oh like Kamala,
• 22:08
  Speaker 3: did she say I told you so?
• 22:09
  Speaker 5: Did she say?
• 22:10
  Speaker 3: Who cares? I hope she does say I told you so.
• 22:13
  Speaker 3: I don't know why I would change my name to
• 22:14
  Speaker 3: I told you so, Harris. You see what I'm saying.
• 22:18
  Speaker 3: Fucker Kamala, I told you so, Harris, because the reality
• 22:23
  Speaker 3: is those of us who had common sense knew that
• 22:26
  Speaker 3: this was gonna happen. I think what we have to
• 22:28
  Speaker 3: be very aware of is that the disease is not
• 22:33
  Speaker 3: Donald Trump. The disease is the people that were comfortable
• 22:37
  Speaker 3: with somebody who has a spirit that we have watched
• 22:40
  Speaker 3: presented itself already in the presidency to then go on
• 22:45
  Speaker 3: board and say, we do like the fact that he
• 22:47
  Speaker 3: wants to get immigrants out, knowing that this was a
• 22:50
  Speaker 3: place that was stolen from the Native Americans and is
• 22:52
  Speaker 3: built on immigrants.
• 22:54
  Speaker 5: We do want him to.
• 22:55
  Speaker 3: Get put women back in the times when they couldn't
• 22:58
  Speaker 3: knowing how women have contributed to sciety. We do want
• 23:01
  Speaker 3: him to put blacks back in a place when they don't,
• 23:03
  Speaker 3: knowing to the contributions that black people have made, not
• 23:05
  Speaker 3: only to the soil here, but to the progression of
• 23:08
  Speaker 3: this country. And it doesn't advantage us at any point
• 23:11
  Speaker 3: in time, because we will never have the power that
• 23:13
  Speaker 3: we need to really be free in this country.
• 23:16
  Speaker 5: They said, with.
• 23:17
  Speaker 3: All of that and all of these people who are
• 23:20
  Speaker 3: serving the greater good, even though America never serves them,
• 23:24
  Speaker 3: we still gonna say fuck you to them because we
• 23:27
  Speaker 3: want it all only to realize that this country that
• 23:31
  Speaker 3: has been built on white supremacy and under the guise
• 23:35
  Speaker 3: of racism being strong, is really a society about classism.
• 23:40
  Speaker 3: So at the end of the day, once they have
• 23:42
  Speaker 3: separated the largest group at the bottom and divided us
• 23:46
  Speaker 3: across boards, now it's easy to take over everything because
• 23:52
  Speaker 3: you don't have the power of black people.
• 23:54
  Speaker 5: Right now, we are tired. What do we like?
• 23:57
  Speaker 3: We've been dealing with this shit time and time again,
• 24:00
  Speaker 3: and no matter how many times we put ourselves in
• 24:02
  Speaker 3: an environment whit with white people and have white friends,
• 24:05
  Speaker 3: we keep saying this is our plight. It's still kind
• 24:07
  Speaker 3: of like, oh, you know, but now white people have
• 24:10
  Speaker 3: to see the same shit. And I don't have time
• 24:13
  Speaker 3: to be holding white people's hands into oppression.
• 24:18
  Speaker 5: I don't have time.
• 24:18
  Speaker 2: Can you believe it?
• 24:20
  Speaker 5: Can you? But what is happening? I don't know.
• 24:23
  Speaker 3: When we kept saying stop killing black people and black
• 24:26
  Speaker 3: lives matter, people are like, oh, no, it's all lives.
• 24:29
  Speaker 3: We're we're not saying black lives because we don't think
• 24:32
  Speaker 3: it's all lives. We're saying black lives because you don't
• 24:35
  Speaker 3: know that black lives matter, but then you want to
• 24:37
  Speaker 3: gaslight us into believing that we're trying.
• 24:39
  Speaker 5: To be this. You know, they want to be better,
• 24:41
  Speaker 5: they want to know, we just want to be a
• 24:42
  Speaker 5: part of But I.
• 24:44
  Speaker 2: Think a lot of white people do understand that, and
• 24:46
  Speaker 2: there's a group of people that don't understand that.
• 24:49
  Speaker 3: It's not all blanket. You can't no, no, no, let me
• 24:51
  Speaker 3: black people or white people, let me, let me, let
• 24:54
  Speaker 3: me pull let me let's no, no no. I will say that.
• 24:56
  Speaker 3: I will say that because what happens is when somebody
• 25:00
  Speaker 3: tells you how they hurt.
• 25:01
  Speaker 5: Right, we're talking in general. A person says how they hurt.
• 25:05
  Speaker 3: You can either listen and go, how can I help
• 25:09
  Speaker 3: you not have that hurt? Right, and that's very centered
• 25:12
  Speaker 3: around that person, or they can tell you how they're
• 25:15
  Speaker 3: hurt and you can go, I didn't cause that hurt.
• 25:18
  Speaker 2: Uh huh.
• 25:19
  Speaker 3: Whether you cause it or not has nothing to do
• 25:22
  Speaker 3: with the fact that this person is hurting. So when
• 25:26
  Speaker 3: we have a conversation, especially as a black woman, and
• 25:29
  Speaker 3: I go, as a black woman, this is what's happening
• 25:32
  Speaker 3: to me, and I'll have men go, well, I don't know,
• 25:35
  Speaker 3: as a woman, and maybe certain things as a woman,
• 25:37
  Speaker 3: white women can relate to, and then they appreciate. Then
• 25:40
  Speaker 3: there's parts that white women will not relate to because
• 25:42
  Speaker 3: it's a problem as a black person, and then those
• 25:45
  Speaker 3: things come together as a black woman. And if I
• 25:48
  Speaker 3: say to a white woman, here's what's going on, and
• 25:52
  Speaker 3: that white woman says, well, you know it's not me,
• 25:54
  Speaker 3: it's like, okay, bitch, it ain't you. But I still
• 25:58
  Speaker 3: got this shit going on. So how am I gonna
• 26:01
  Speaker 3: help it? And we gotta stop this people being defensive
• 26:05
  Speaker 3: when somebody says this is what's happening. Because it doesn't
• 26:09
  Speaker 3: matter whether you support a whether you not all white people.
• 26:12
  Speaker 3: We can only say not all white people. If it
• 26:14
  Speaker 3: was like Donald Trump didn't becoming it was enough white people.
• 26:18
  Speaker 3: And because it's enough white people, and we keep saying
• 26:21
  Speaker 3: not all white people, we ain't focused on how many
• 26:23
  Speaker 3: fucking white people fucked up, how many fucking white women
• 26:27
  Speaker 3: fucked up, how many fucking people of color fucked up
• 26:32
  Speaker 3: just because they thought they weren't the people of color
• 26:34
  Speaker 3: that were gonna be disenfranchised even further. So I'm not
• 26:37
  Speaker 3: here to give any grace to how anybody feels about
• 26:41
  Speaker 3: what I'm telling you about what's fucking happening, because when
• 26:43
  Speaker 3: we play this.
• 26:44
  Speaker 5: Game, we have a dictator.
• 26:47
  Speaker 3: Well said, I know she wants to eat my pussy
• 26:49
  Speaker 3: after that, look at her and I saw a little
• 26:51
  Speaker 3: nipple coming out of the little shirt.
• 26:54
  Speaker 5: Bitch.
• 26:55
  Speaker 2: We're gonna take a break and we'll be right back
• 26:56
  Speaker 2: with Y'allmnika, Okay, we're back with Yaminika Sonders. First of all,
• 27:04
  Speaker 2: follow her on Instagram. She gets banned a lot on Instagram.
• 27:09
  Speaker 2: She gets shadowed.
• 27:10
  Speaker 5: Chelsea was like, I was trying to watch something. Where
• 27:12
  Speaker 5: are you? I'm like, girl, they took me down again?
• 27:14
  Speaker 2: How do they? How do they do that? What did
• 27:16
  Speaker 2: they do? They tell you why.
• 27:17
  Speaker 5: Because I started saying cracker, it's done, it's done. You
• 27:20
  Speaker 5: can say nigga all day.
• 27:21
  Speaker 3: Long, but crack of white people, Like remember when white
• 27:23
  Speaker 3: women were like Karen is the inward.
• 27:25
  Speaker 5: We're like, what, bitch?
• 27:27
  Speaker 2: I like being called a cracker. I'm not going to
• 27:29
  Speaker 2: pretend I don't. I fucking like it. It's funny. You know,
• 27:32
  Speaker 2: I was in South Africa with my sister once and
• 27:34
  Speaker 2: we had this kind of guide in South Africa, and
• 27:36
  Speaker 2: you know, the racism is thick, thick there and we
• 27:40
  Speaker 2: had this guy who was kind of like giving us
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: his version. He's a white man. He was giving us
• 27:44
  Speaker 2: his version of like what happened the history of South
• 27:46
  Speaker 2: Africa with the Dutch and the English and la la la,
• 27:49
  Speaker 2: and he you know, his version was an an after.
• 27:54
  Speaker 2: I hated. I hated this guy from the minute I
• 27:56
  Speaker 2: met him. I just my sister knew. She's like, you've
• 28:00
  Speaker 2: my sisters. She was just like, oh, you're not gonna.
• 28:02
  Speaker 2: I didn't like the way he looked at and like
• 28:04
  Speaker 2: his body. I didn't like his clothing. I was like, oh,
• 28:06
  Speaker 2: this guy is shut down.
• 28:08
  Speaker 5: You don't like who you get quiet.
• 28:09
  Speaker 2: I don't like it, and I have no poker face.
• 28:11
  Speaker 2: I can't. And as soon as he walked away, my
• 28:15
  Speaker 2: sister looked at me and she goes, that's he's the
• 28:17
  Speaker 2: reason why black people came up with the word cracker. Okay,
• 28:24
  Speaker 2: we're gonna take some callers. We're giving advice.
• 28:27
  Speaker 7: Are you ready for the Zamnica?
• 28:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah, she's ready. She's ready.
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 28:31
  Speaker 5: I don't think they are, but it's good.
• 28:33
  Speaker 2: Okay, Okay, is anyone ready?
• 28:35
  Speaker 7: So our first caller is Alicia. She says, Dear Chelsea.
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: I'm a thirty nine year old stay at home mom
• 28:43
  Speaker 1: to a fifteen month old son who is just a cutie.
• 28:46
  Speaker 1: I like to make her doze with my vape pen
• 28:48
  Speaker 1: and enjoy gummies regularly. I kept smoking it as it's
• 28:51
  Speaker 1: the worst way to consume, but since I have been
• 28:53
  Speaker 1: a cannabis user my entire life, I feel like it's
• 28:55
  Speaker 1: part of who I am. Lately, I've been contemplating whether
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: it's serving me I go. I'm thinking it's great, it's
• 29:01
  Speaker 1: not a problem. I enjoy the creativity it provides, and
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: I feel like I understand my son better when I'm high.
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: But then I think about the fact that I'm high
• 29:08
  Speaker 1: all day long and figure it can't be that healthy.
• 29:11
  Speaker 1: So when I try to wait until after twelve PM
• 29:14
  Speaker 1: or after five pm, I always negotiate with myself and
• 29:17
  Speaker 1: end up vaping. The worst part is my husband doesn't
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: know I'm high all day. He just thinks I use
• 29:23
  Speaker 1: it at night. He has an office studio in the backyard,
• 29:25
  Speaker 1: so he's home all day but not in sides. It's
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: very easy for me to hide it from him, but
• 29:29
  Speaker 1: I hate the fact that I'm even hiding it at all.
• 29:32
  Speaker 1: I live in an area where it's easily accessible and
• 29:34
  Speaker 1: not considered it a big deal. But because I use
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: it so frequently, I often wake up feeling groggy or
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: just met and feel like I'm doing something wrong. I
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: know I'm not addicted, because when I go out of
• 29:43
  Speaker 1: town or i'm somewhere, I can't bring my pen. It's
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: not a problem, but I'm having serious trouble only consuming
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: it at night and staying sober during the day. As
• 29:51
  Speaker 1: a regular user, yourself, what do you think about this?
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: Do I have a problem? Alisha?
• 29:55
  Speaker 2: Hi? Aleisha, Wow, she's right there.
• 30:00
  Speaker 5: You're right. That was like a novel. No, it was beautiful.
• 30:07
  Speaker 3: Yeah, because you know, America's not doing well in literacy
• 30:10
  Speaker 3: right now, so we need to put you out the
• 30:12
  Speaker 3: in full front.
• 30:13
  Speaker 5: So I'm saying, smoke, keep smoking.
• 30:16
  Speaker 2: I would say if you're having feelings like that, though,
• 30:19
  Speaker 2: if you're having feelings about smoking, if you can smoke
• 30:22
  Speaker 2: in your care, free about it, and you're not worried
• 30:24
  Speaker 2: about it and overthinking about it, then that's one thing.
• 30:26
  Speaker 2: But it sounds like you're you're definitely worried about the
• 30:29
  Speaker 2: amount that you're consuming and that you're consuming it all day,
• 30:32
  Speaker 2: and that you're not hiding it from your husband and
• 30:35
  Speaker 2: and like everything you're saying sounds like you just have
• 30:38
  Speaker 2: a really bad habit of smoking it too frequently. The
• 30:42
  Speaker 2: problem with smoking weed too much is that it doesn't
• 30:45
  Speaker 2: give you the buzz that you get when you when
• 30:47
  Speaker 2: you take breaks, like when you smoke it less frequently,
• 30:50
  Speaker 2: there's a better buzz. Like if I get high all
• 30:53
  Speaker 2: day long, I become a little bit dead in the head.
• 30:55
  Speaker 2: That's not my idea of a good time. I like
• 30:57
  Speaker 2: to have a joint or smoke weed, you know, at night.
• 31:00
  Speaker 2: Like there are days where I smoke all day long.
• 31:02
  Speaker 2: If I'm skiing in Whistler and I have, you know,
• 31:04
  Speaker 2: a pipe, and I'm like, okay, I'll just take hits
• 31:06
  Speaker 2: of it all day long. But over more, it's not
• 31:09
  Speaker 2: a great habit all day long, every day. That's just
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: not the best use of your time. You can always
• 31:14
  Speaker 2: reward yourself in the evening. You don't have to deprive yourself.
• 31:16
  Speaker 2: But I would say to create a new habit around
• 31:19
  Speaker 2: your son, kind of respecting your relationship with your son.
• 31:22
  Speaker 2: He doesn't need his mom to be high to be
• 31:24
  Speaker 2: around him. That's what you're saying, But it's a little
• 31:27
  Speaker 2: bit what you're saying.
• 31:29
  Speaker 7: And it's just better.
• 31:30
  Speaker 2: I mean it's better. It's not the right word.
• 31:32
  Speaker 9: It's just it's creates an environment of just a relax
• 31:36
  Speaker 9: like fun. If he's like a little FESSI I'm just
• 31:38
  Speaker 9: like not important, you know. So I just feel like
• 31:42
  Speaker 9: it creates a positive environment. Even though, yeah, there, I
• 31:45
  Speaker 9: do think that it's not a good idea to be
• 31:47
  Speaker 9: high all day. The trouble I have is just stopping
• 31:50
  Speaker 9: through the day because once I start that first morning hit,
• 31:54
  Speaker 9: then it's like a snowball effect.
• 31:56
  Speaker 2: Of course, I've been there, I know exactly what you're
• 31:58
  Speaker 2: talking about. I would say to put your vapens away
• 32:01
  Speaker 2: until six o'clock at night. I would say to just
• 32:03
  Speaker 2: experiment with that. Make it a rule for a week
• 32:07
  Speaker 2: to just not smoke during the day. You can do it.
• 32:10
  Speaker 2: You have power within you to make that decision and
• 32:13
  Speaker 2: to follow through and just have it at night. And
• 32:15
  Speaker 2: I honestly think you're going to enjoy it more so
• 32:18
  Speaker 2: at night and you're starting going to start. The first
• 32:20
  Speaker 2: couple of days are going to be difficult, but it's
• 32:22
  Speaker 2: not going to be difficult after that. If you want
• 32:24
  Speaker 2: to be present for your son, I know you do.
• 32:27
  Speaker 2: That's what we're talking. We're here to talk about if
• 32:29
  Speaker 2: you want to be present for your son you don't have.
• 32:31
  Speaker 2: This is just so you know when you have a child,
• 32:34
  Speaker 2: this is also going to come up for you. You know,
• 32:35
  Speaker 2: you're not gonna be able to smoke weed all or
• 32:38
  Speaker 2: you will be well, you'll just do whatever you want.
• 32:40
  Speaker 5: I know.
• 32:40
  Speaker 3: I'm just watching you and an awe, like, the information
• 32:44
  Speaker 3: you're giving is amazing.
• 32:45
  Speaker 2: Well, I think that you and I think that it's
• 32:48
  Speaker 2: just a good it's a it's a good example to
• 32:50
  Speaker 2: set for yourself and for your and for your child.
• 32:52
  Speaker 2: And you should also let your husband know. Hey, you
• 32:55
  Speaker 2: know what, I'm only going to smoke weed after six
• 32:57
  Speaker 2: o'clock from now on. I've decided that's what I'm going
• 32:59
  Speaker 2: to do. Some times I pick up a pen during
• 33:01
  Speaker 2: the day and just get through the phase of that,
• 33:03
  Speaker 2: get through a phase of creating a new habit. And
• 33:05
  Speaker 2: once you are through that phase, once you go like
• 33:08
  Speaker 2: thirty days of just doing it after six pm, then
• 33:12
  Speaker 2: every once in a while, if you if there's a
• 33:14
  Speaker 2: moment that's so stressful during the day and you're like,
• 33:16
  Speaker 2: oh God, I could use a hit, you can use
• 33:18
  Speaker 2: it incrementally, but you have to understand the slippery slope.
• 33:21
  Speaker 2: When we take one hit and your home all day
• 33:23
  Speaker 2: with your kid, You're going to take another hit, and
• 33:25
  Speaker 2: you're going to take another one, and you're going to
• 33:27
  Speaker 2: take another one. Right, So it's up to you to
• 33:29
  Speaker 2: rehabituate your life and you're going to be better for it,
• 33:32
  Speaker 2: and you're going to be a better parent. You're going
• 33:33
  Speaker 2: to feel better about yourself. The reason you're calling is
• 33:36
  Speaker 2: because you're having misgivings about the way that you're using.
• 33:39
  Speaker 8: Can I think it's a problem.
• 33:40
  Speaker 2: So if you think that it is, oh, look are
• 33:44
  Speaker 2: you okay?
• 33:45
  Speaker 5: Right?
• 33:46
  Speaker 8: Right?
• 33:47
  Speaker 2: So I would just say that you don't have to
• 33:49
  Speaker 2: like quit marijuana, just use it more sparingly and be
• 33:53
  Speaker 2: more discerning about when you want to get high. You know,
• 33:56
  Speaker 2: it should be fun, it should be a celebration. When
• 33:58
  Speaker 2: I smoke weed all day, I'm not laughing. I'm not
• 34:00
  Speaker 2: having the best time. I eventually just want to go
• 34:02
  Speaker 2: to sleep at seven. Like it's not it's not helpful
• 34:05
  Speaker 2: to smoke weed all day, but it's it's really fun.
• 34:08
  Speaker 2: Like last night, I we came, I had a joint.
• 34:10
  Speaker 2: I can't travel with wheed anymore because I'm so paranoid
• 34:13
  Speaker 2: about getting you know, pulled over or stopped at TSA
• 34:16
  Speaker 2: because everyone knows how much I love drugs. You know,
• 34:19
  Speaker 2: it's very public. So uh and my whole new set
• 34:23
  Speaker 2: is about everywhere I take drugs, so I have to stop.
• 34:26
  Speaker 2: I've basically told on myself. So I'm with you. I
• 34:29
  Speaker 2: totally understand and I get you, and but I would
• 34:32
  Speaker 2: advise you to do that, and you can do it.
• 34:34
  Speaker 2: You cannot smoke sweed until six pm. You're completely capable
• 34:37
  Speaker 2: of doing that. I have no doubt in my mind.
• 34:39
  Speaker 10: I think I need like a lock box or something,
• 34:42
  Speaker 10: because I say, they have like little lock boxes you
• 34:44
  Speaker 10: can get for your cell phone and you just like
• 34:46
  Speaker 10: put them in there, set your little timer for whenever
• 34:49
  Speaker 10: you want, and like the are you gonna go to
• 34:50
  Speaker 10: the store and get more?
• 34:51
  Speaker 7: Probably not, like you're gonna wait.
• 34:53
  Speaker 6: Yeah, it's a bit of my street.
• 34:57
  Speaker 7: Damn it so close?
• 34:58
  Speaker 2: What a weed store? Yeah? Oh okay, Well, but I
• 35:02
  Speaker 2: also think, like have some accountability, like tell your husband
• 35:04
  Speaker 2: so that you can be accountable, you know what I mean,
• 35:06
  Speaker 2: Just say hey, I'm gonna give I'm gonna give you
• 35:08
  Speaker 2: my vayepen. I don't want it until six o'clock. Okay,
• 35:10
  Speaker 2: just hold it for me.
• 35:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and I don't even think you need a tattle
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: on yourself or what you have been doing. Just now, like, hey,
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: this has been tempting me, so like just keep it
• 35:18
  Speaker 1: in your office until six or whatever.
• 35:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah, then you're a winner all the way around.
• 35:21
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 35:21
  Speaker 9: I would hate it if he saw me and I
• 35:24
  Speaker 9: didn't realize and like it became an issue because I
• 35:26
  Speaker 9: don't want to lie to him or him to be.
• 35:28
  Speaker 7: Like, what are you doing all day?
• 35:29
  Speaker 9: I think you would think I'm extremely irresponsible.
• 35:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but you're not.
• 35:33
  Speaker 10: You're not.
• 35:34
  Speaker 5: You're not.
• 35:35
  Speaker 2: Don't yourself up about it. Just just make a new habit.
• 35:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, okay.
• 35:41
  Speaker 9: Okay, thanks so much, ladies. Thanks, okay, bye.
• 35:46
  Speaker 2: I just want to make a note that Yamandika's advice
• 35:48
  Speaker 2: was to continue to smoke weed with her baby. Take
• 35:52
  Speaker 2: make sure that's on record.
• 35:53
  Speaker 3: No no, no, no, no no oh yeah yah okay, But
• 35:56
  Speaker 3: what I'm saying is to be fair, I was very
• 36:00
  Speaker 3: pressed with you, m thank you.
• 36:02
  Speaker 5: You know what I'm saying, Like the information you gave
• 36:04
  Speaker 5: was so thoughtful.
• 36:05
  Speaker 7: She's good at this, Yaminika.
• 36:07
  Speaker 5: I know I need just at tuning in. Why you
• 36:09
  Speaker 5: don't ever give me advice like.
• 36:10
  Speaker 2: This because you don't fucking listen. First of all, remember, yeah, yeah,
• 36:15
  Speaker 2: I get it, Okay.
• 36:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Well our next caller is Ali and Yaminika.
• 36:21
  Speaker 7: You're an oldest sister, right.
• 36:22
  Speaker 5: Yes, I have. I have three half sisters. We share
• 36:26
  Speaker 5: same father.
• 36:27
  Speaker 1: Yes, all right, this is a little bit about having
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: to take care of your sisters, so Ali says, Dear Chelsea.
• 36:33
  Speaker 1: I've been a fan for longer than I care to admit,
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: because it will aige us both either way. I'm emailing because,
• 36:38
  Speaker 1: like you, I lost a brother at a young age,
• 36:40
  Speaker 1: and it's impacted my family for years in different ways.
• 36:43
  Speaker 7: I'm the youngest of four. My sister, who's ten years older.
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: Has continually made bad decisions in the years that have followed,
• 36:50
  Speaker 1: and I've always been the one to hold things together
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: for our family. This past year was the final straw
• 36:54
  Speaker 1: when she fell prey to a bitcoin scam and my
• 36:57
  Speaker 1: parents bailed her out to keep her out of jail. Honestly,
• 37:01
  Speaker 1: I'm tired of being the one to keep shit together.
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: I want to finally break this cycle and figure out
• 37:05
  Speaker 1: how to move forward with her while staying true to
• 37:07
  Speaker 1: my own boundaries to protect myself and my kids. I
• 37:10
  Speaker 1: promise I will get a therapist toe and not just
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: rely on the show, but I would love your advice.
• 37:15
  Speaker 5: Ali.
• 37:16
  Speaker 2: Hi, alliw hi, so nice to see you. Nice to
• 37:20
  Speaker 2: see you too. This is our special guest, Yamnika Saunders
• 37:23
  Speaker 2: is here today.
• 37:24
  Speaker 5: Hi allie Hi.
• 37:26
  Speaker 2: That's such a bummer that your sister is so susceptible
• 37:30
  Speaker 2: to all of that and that fell for a bitcoin
• 37:32
  Speaker 2: scheme and scam. So what are you thinking about doing
• 37:35
  Speaker 2: you want to cut her off or what? I like,
• 37:37
  Speaker 2: where are you right now?
• 37:38
  Speaker 8: Well, like I said in my email, I did seek
• 37:41
  Speaker 8: a therapist and she has been truly wonderful, Like has
• 37:45
  Speaker 8: really helped me navigate the complex relationships not only between
• 37:49
  Speaker 8: my sister and my parents, and kind of my brother too,
• 37:52
  Speaker 8: as you know, like after losing a brother, everybody is
• 37:54
  Speaker 8: affected in different ways. But yeah, so I think she
• 37:57
  Speaker 8: has really helped me in understanding how we all got
• 38:01
  Speaker 8: to the point that we're at. I don't think I'm
• 38:04
  Speaker 8: ready to cut them all out. Definitely still on the table,
• 38:07
  Speaker 8: but at this point not really because we don't really
• 38:10
  Speaker 8: have a lot of family around here. My husband's from
• 38:12
  Speaker 8: the UK, so like they are our family so it's complicated,
• 38:16
  Speaker 8: see as you know.
• 38:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean I think that, like I don't know
• 38:20
  Speaker 2: that there's a necessary it's necessary to do anything in
• 38:22
  Speaker 2: this moment, Like I think considering that your family history
• 38:26
  Speaker 2: and everything you're saying, like, most parents aren't going to
• 38:28
  Speaker 2: bail their kid out when when that happens, And just
• 38:31
  Speaker 2: because she's made some bad decisions doesn't mean that she's
• 38:34
  Speaker 2: worth cutting out of your life. You want to really
• 38:36
  Speaker 2: build and it sounds like you're already doing that with
• 38:37
  Speaker 2: your therapist. Build an understanding and empathy and compassion for
• 38:42
  Speaker 2: the fact that she's experiencing life in a different way
• 38:44
  Speaker 2: than you are, that she's not as responsible as you are.
• 38:47
  Speaker 2: You know, like we all have a lot of judgment
• 38:49
  Speaker 2: when people don't act the way that we do. You know,
• 38:51
  Speaker 2: certain people I know I do. I have a real
• 38:53
  Speaker 2: problem with judging others when I think they make stupid
• 38:55
  Speaker 2: decisions or they're not looking after themselves. But it's really
• 38:58
  Speaker 2: not your job to be police everyone. Sometimes showing up
• 39:01
  Speaker 2: with extra love and doubling down on love and kindness
• 39:04
  Speaker 2: helps people get out of rots too. So there's another way,
• 39:07
  Speaker 2: like an avenue to go about it. What do you
• 39:09
  Speaker 2: I mean, what do you think.
• 39:10
  Speaker 3: I've had a situation like that. Not to get too
• 39:14
  Speaker 3: much into my own personal you know, because it involves
• 39:16
  Speaker 3: with my family. I'll use this one example with my mother.
• 39:20
  Speaker 3: My mother, I can tell her a thousand times I
• 39:23
  Speaker 3: don't want her to do something because I don't want
• 39:26
  Speaker 3: it to hurt her, you know, disadvantage her. I know
• 39:29
  Speaker 3: what the result of that's going to be, and I'm
• 39:32
  Speaker 3: trying to protect her, and my mother will still go okay,
• 39:37
  Speaker 3: let me still be involved with this part and go mom,
• 39:39
  Speaker 3: you know we know what's going but you know God
• 39:42
  Speaker 3: told me okay. So the boundary is because watching you
• 39:48
  Speaker 3: be frustrated by a situation with somebody that I know
• 39:52
  Speaker 3: is frustrated is going to frustrate you or take advantage
• 39:54
  Speaker 3: of you, and you still are doing that. I can't
• 39:58
  Speaker 3: go on that emotional journey with you. I'm gonna be
• 40:01
  Speaker 3: here as your daughter. I love you, But when this
• 40:04
  Speaker 3: thing blows back on you, like it's done time and
• 40:07
  Speaker 3: time again, I'm not your resource to have a conversation
• 40:10
  Speaker 3: about how to get over that. So if you're fine
• 40:13
  Speaker 3: with me not being there for you at all while
• 40:16
  Speaker 3: you handle that, continue to do what you do but
• 40:19
  Speaker 3: any any point in time that you expect me to
• 40:21
  Speaker 3: be emotionally there and supportive with you, my opinion has
• 40:25
  Speaker 3: to also matter, and the decisions that you're making.
• 40:29
  Speaker 8: No, And I think that makes perfect sense. That's a
• 40:31
  Speaker 8: healthy boundary. I think. I mean, like you said, I'm
• 40:33
  Speaker 8: learning how to set those with everybody, and I think, yeah,
• 40:36
  Speaker 8: that definitely helps, because it's like I've also been reading
• 40:39
  Speaker 8: mel Robbin's book about Let Them, and it'sself freaking hard.
• 40:42
  Speaker 5: Yes, you're like a very loving person.
• 40:45
  Speaker 3: And that's the thing about it, right when you're loving
• 40:48
  Speaker 3: and you're because you'll be surprised. Reciprocity in people is
• 40:53
  Speaker 3: not given right. And sometimes you'd be like, why would
• 40:56
  Speaker 3: somebody do this? I would never do that. I would
• 40:59
  Speaker 3: never do this to my per I would never put
• 41:01
  Speaker 3: And then some people don't even think like that. And
• 41:03
  Speaker 3: if you're thinking for yourself emotionally and for your sister
• 41:06
  Speaker 3: and all the nots, just she get you're doing a
• 41:08
  Speaker 3: lot of emotional thinking and what's left over for you,
• 41:12
  Speaker 3: Then you feel taking advantage of right, You feel discredited,
• 41:17
  Speaker 3: you feel unheard because you keep yelling to people that no,
• 41:22
  Speaker 3: preserve your energy for you.
• 41:23
  Speaker 5: You need to preserve some for you, and.
• 41:25
  Speaker 3: Your parents love you and they'll be there. But they
• 41:28
  Speaker 3: also got another daughter they gotta fucking deal with, and
• 41:30
  Speaker 3: that's Daybirtha. Not you. You're her sister, You're not her
• 41:34
  Speaker 3: mother and her father.
• 41:35
  Speaker 8: And I think that's fair. I think where some of
• 41:37
  Speaker 8: the complication comes in is my parents. Even I'm the
• 41:39
  Speaker 8: youngest youngest of the four of us, they expect me
• 41:42
  Speaker 8: to be the one to kind of help her learn
• 41:45
  Speaker 8: right from wrong and like to be the middle person
• 41:46
  Speaker 8: because I've always been the middle person between my parents
• 41:49
  Speaker 8: and my sister. And when I cut myself out of that,
• 41:51
  Speaker 8: they were kind of just they were mad at me,
• 41:54
  Speaker 8: and I was like, what the hell, Like I'm doing
• 41:55
  Speaker 8: the I'm trying to set my own boundaries for myself
• 42:00
  Speaker 8: my kids, and the fact that they didn't respect that
• 42:02
  Speaker 8: really annoyed me too.
• 42:03
  Speaker 1: So it's like, anytime you set a healthy boundary, like
• 42:06
  Speaker 1: the people who benefited from your lack of boundaries are
• 42:10
  Speaker 1: going to be upset with that, And like that's kind
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: of okay. The other thing I will say is I
• 42:16
  Speaker 1: love this idea of like doubling down on love. And
• 42:18
  Speaker 1: I'll also just say loving someone doesn't necessarily mean that
• 42:22
  Speaker 1: like you're the shield that keeps them from experiencing consequences.
• 42:26
  Speaker 7: And it sounds like some of the.
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: Boundaries you're putting in place have maybe been active in
• 42:32
  Speaker 1: that in that way.
• 42:33
  Speaker 8: Yes, absolutely, And I think that's part of it too,
• 42:35
  Speaker 8: is like we're all kind of figuring out new roles
• 42:38
  Speaker 8: and dynamics in the family, with me removing myself from that,
• 42:41
  Speaker 8: so navigating kind of where we love too.
• 42:44
  Speaker 3: I want you to understand, Ali, That's also what I'm
• 42:48
  Speaker 3: telling you is the people in the world that will
• 42:51
  Speaker 3: take advantage of kindness and love. You understand. You don't
• 42:55
  Speaker 3: have to stop loving, you have to turn it off,
• 43:00
  Speaker 3: hold it. It doesn't mean respect is not there. Okay,
• 43:04
  Speaker 3: you understand yep, because a lot of people not that
• 43:07
  Speaker 3: I'm against what they're saying. I'm not standing down on this,
• 43:09
  Speaker 3: doubling down on love, love yourself. You can't love everybody,
• 43:14
  Speaker 3: and people will take advantage. Once they've shown you they're
• 43:16
  Speaker 3: taking advantage, You've got to start making decisions that are
• 43:20
  Speaker 3: going to benefit your own mental capacity. Trust me, I'm
• 43:24
  Speaker 3: forty six, I'm perry, menopausal. I've been sweating here and there.
• 43:29
  Speaker 3: I don't give a fuck about nobody right now.
• 43:32
  Speaker 5: You understand it's taking all.
• 43:34
  Speaker 3: In me to give a fuck about you right now
• 43:36
  Speaker 3: because I'm perryman a pausal.
• 43:38
  Speaker 2: She didn't know, by the way, she didn't know she
• 43:39
  Speaker 2: was Perry menopausal, so I told her last night.
• 43:41
  Speaker 3: So but I wish you well, Alli, I see you
• 43:46
  Speaker 3: have such a beautiful spirit.
• 43:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and don't lose my love and healthy boundaries are
• 43:51
  Speaker 2: the best because you're not only creating them, you're demonstrating
• 43:54
  Speaker 2: them for other people. Like Catherine said, they're not gonna
• 43:57
  Speaker 2: like it in the beginning, and like you admitted that
• 43:59
  Speaker 2: your parents like it. But you are creating a different
• 44:02
  Speaker 2: dynamic and a different paradigm with your family, and that's
• 44:05
  Speaker 2: more important.
• 44:06
  Speaker 8: Right, And I think that's what I want a model
• 44:08
  Speaker 8: for my kids, right, Like, yes, I want I want
• 44:11
  Speaker 8: them to want to spend time with me as an adult,
• 44:12
  Speaker 8: and I want them to whereas I don't have that
• 44:15
  Speaker 8: with my family. It's kind of like an obligation sometimes,
• 44:18
  Speaker 8: And so I want to have better relationships overall.
• 44:21
  Speaker 7: Yeah, well, you're doing the work to get there.
• 44:23
  Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yes.
• 44:29
  Speaker 8: Good luck with perimenopause. I'll be there in a few years,
• 44:31
  Speaker 8: I'm sure.
• 44:31
  Speaker 4: Thank you.
• 44:34
  Speaker 5: Bye.
• 44:36
  Speaker 2: I like that you're just going to go around sweating,
• 44:38
  Speaker 2: you know, like in the meantime, like what's stuff? I
• 44:41
  Speaker 2: don't know what to do. I just found you have
• 44:44
  Speaker 2: from me. I diagnosed you last night. You have to
• 44:47
  Speaker 2: go to your OBG. Y N, you have one, right.
• 44:50
  Speaker 5: I'm a vaginanta of course.
• 44:51
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 44:52
  Speaker 5: Do you think people don't have women they are women
• 44:54
  Speaker 5: that don't have a ob G.
• 44:55
  Speaker 3: I N.
• 44:55
  Speaker 2: I don't know. I mean some people don't. Yeah, some
• 44:57
  Speaker 2: people just don't have doctors that they go to regularly.
• 45:01
  Speaker 5: That's crazy. I'm on my my my charts all the time.
• 45:04
  Speaker 2: My brother doesn't go to a doctor ever. Ever, they
• 45:07
  Speaker 2: never Both of my brothers never go. And maybe it's
• 45:08
  Speaker 2: a mail.
• 45:09
  Speaker 5: That's a man thing too. Yeah yeah, yeah. They don't
• 45:11
  Speaker 5: think they need to check out anything.
• 45:12
  Speaker 2: What's next, Catherine?
• 45:14
  Speaker 7: Well, our next question? This one's just an email, not
• 45:16
  Speaker 7: a caller.
• 45:17
  Speaker 1: It's a little bit tricky, but Yaminika, I listened to
• 45:19
  Speaker 1: your conversation with ts Madison about tricky trends questions, which
• 45:24
  Speaker 1: I would really recommend to anyone.
• 45:25
  Speaker 7: It's a great conversation.
• 45:27
  Speaker 2: I learned so much nice. How do people listen to it?
• 45:30
  Speaker 7: It's on YouTube?
• 45:31
  Speaker 1: So just look up TS Madison and Yaminica Saunders and
• 45:34
  Speaker 1: you will find it.
• 45:35
  Speaker 2: And if you want to try and spell Yaminika, good luck.
• 45:37
  Speaker 5: Y A m A any I k A thank you.
• 45:40
  Speaker 1: Yes, so I thought you'd be a perfect person for
• 45:43
  Speaker 1: this question. Okay, Summer says TS. By the way, I
• 45:46
  Speaker 1: love TS Madison, I mean, yes the best.
• 45:49
  Speaker 2: And also shout out to Yamaha, which is how I
• 45:51
  Speaker 2: pronounced your first names.
• 45:55
  Speaker 5: Dam Well.
• 45:56
  Speaker 1: The subject line is my ex is a woman now?
• 45:59
  Speaker 1: Am I the asshole for blocking Dear Chelsea? Last week
• 46:02
  Speaker 1: I looked at my blocked profiles and noticed that my
• 46:05
  Speaker 1: ex was no longer on there. I figured they had
• 46:07
  Speaker 1: gotten off of social media. I hadn't talked to them
• 46:09
  Speaker 1: in almost a decade. This morning I saw someone sent
• 46:12
  Speaker 1: me a message request. It was my ex, but I
• 46:14
  Speaker 1: guess they're a transwoman now based on the name change
• 46:17
  Speaker 1: and profile photos. Sorry to message you out of the blue,
• 46:20
  Speaker 1: but I woke up today with the memory that today
• 46:22
  Speaker 1: might be your birthday. If it is, and I hope
• 46:24
  Speaker 1: you have a great day. Btw, it's not my birthday.
• 46:28
  Speaker 1: I don't have fond members of this X. I lost
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: my virginity to this person. And not by consent. It
• 46:33
  Speaker 1: was my first serious relationship. We went to high school
• 46:35
  Speaker 1: together and dated in my first year of college. Two
• 46:38
  Speaker 1: years after we broke up, we connected again and I
• 46:40
  Speaker 1: met their wife and two daughters. I liked his wife
• 46:43
  Speaker 1: and daughters, but I got a reminder of why I
• 46:45
  Speaker 1: did not talk to them her and blocked them after
• 46:48
  Speaker 1: a couple of interactions for the next decade. Am I
• 46:51
  Speaker 1: the asshole for wanting to keep blocking their profiles summer?
• 46:54
  Speaker 3: I mean they changed genders, not personality. I mean, what's
• 46:58
  Speaker 3: a dig a dicky?
• 47:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't understand. If you lost your virginity to
• 47:04
  Speaker 2: them without their your consent, and that that's and then
• 47:08
  Speaker 2: you dated the person.
• 47:09
  Speaker 3: That's a trauma. Sometimes that's a trauma response to an essay.
• 47:13
  Speaker 3: You become victimized and it's a weird. So I feel
• 47:16
  Speaker 3: bad for that, and I understand the trauma. What I'm
• 47:19
  Speaker 3: telling you is, I think this person may think that
• 47:23
  Speaker 3: they're transphobic because they're doing this, Because this has nothing
• 47:26
  Speaker 3: to do with trans an asshole. That's a person nality, right,
• 47:32
  Speaker 3: that's a spirit thing.
• 47:34
  Speaker 5: You can't transition your spirit.
• 47:36
  Speaker 3: You understand you're born with a shitty spirit you're gonna
• 47:39
  Speaker 3: keep a shitty spirit until you talk to somebody about
• 47:41
  Speaker 3: your shitty spirit.
• 47:43
  Speaker 5: So keep the person blocked.
• 47:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah yourself, Yeah yeah, agreed, agreed.
• 47:52
  Speaker 1: And then also maybe like if you're not already in therapy,
• 47:54
  Speaker 1: like check some of that out just so you can
• 47:56
  Speaker 1: release some anger and work through some of the stuff
• 47:58
  Speaker 1: that happened, because that's stuff.
• 48:01
  Speaker 7: Okay, Well let's take a quick break and we'll have
• 48:03
  Speaker 7: a quickie to wrap up.
• 48:04
  Speaker 2: Okay, we'll be right back with Yaminicas Sanders. And we're
• 48:10
  Speaker 2: back with Yaminica Sanders. Do you wanna where was less
• 48:15
  Speaker 2: than you had sex? By the way, I I did,
• 48:19
  Speaker 2: I just did.
• 48:20
  Speaker 3: You sent me a box, Chelsea sent me, not even
• 48:25
  Speaker 3: a box, you know the boxes where you order a
• 48:27
  Speaker 3: Christmas tree right from Amazon and they send you a
• 48:31
  Speaker 3: large box.
• 48:32
  Speaker 5: They can't even break the ship up. It's a lot.
• 48:34
  Speaker 3: She sent me that size box of vibrators, dildos, and
• 48:39
  Speaker 3: machines that can lick your vagina without your assistance. And
• 48:44
  Speaker 3: I and one of them, one was in a baggie,
• 48:48
  Speaker 3: don't even not even like a bag, like I'm talking
• 48:51
  Speaker 3: about a glass like one of them yellow and blue
• 48:54
  Speaker 3: makes green.
• 48:55
  Speaker 5: You know all that shit. She sent me that look
• 48:58
  Speaker 5: and it was greasy.
• 49:00
  Speaker 3: Then she sent me the wheel because I wanted to
• 49:02
  Speaker 3: use the one with the licking thing because I've never
• 49:04
  Speaker 3: had it before. She sent me to one that she
• 49:07
  Speaker 3: she didn't even wipe it down.
• 49:09
  Speaker 2: The the wipe it down, the loub was.
• 49:12
  Speaker 5: So stuck on there it melted into the thing. I was.
• 49:17
  Speaker 5: It was you ever seen a mechanic.
• 49:19
  Speaker 3: When he got from underneath the hood of a car
• 49:22
  Speaker 3: and all it like the the transmission fluid dropped down
• 49:25
  Speaker 3: on his face and he had to open it in
• 49:27
  Speaker 3: like a ak. Well, that's it was like that. I
• 49:31
  Speaker 3: could not believe it. What you do to your vagina,
• 49:34
  Speaker 3: Chelsea is insane. But I do currently have three of
• 49:38
  Speaker 3: them in rotation and the one we saw them last night,
• 49:41
  Speaker 3: and I have some out on the front rod. I
• 49:43
  Speaker 3: can't get rid of them.
• 49:44
  Speaker 2: None of the vibrators that I sent you had been
• 49:46
  Speaker 2: used by me. I got lots of swags sent to
• 49:49
  Speaker 2: my house. I told Carlos, who works use their vibran,
• 49:57
  Speaker 2: to get all the vibrators out of the house and
• 49:59
  Speaker 2: to send them to Yaminika, because I know how horny
• 50:02
  Speaker 2: you are. I know how horney I've been listening. I
• 50:05
  Speaker 2: hear you. I see how you interact with men, and
• 50:08
  Speaker 2: you need like a constant penetration of some sort. So
• 50:11
  Speaker 2: as a gesture of friendship, I said, you know who
• 50:14
  Speaker 2: could really put these fucking vibrators to use? The one
• 50:18
  Speaker 2: that was used I can't speak to because I've never
• 50:20
  Speaker 2: used any of those. But I did have a friend
• 50:22
  Speaker 2: who came from Whistler who stayed at my house, and
• 50:24
  Speaker 2: when she saw my I have a table where people
• 50:27
  Speaker 2: send all of their you know, when when a celebrity
• 50:29
  Speaker 2: comes out with a vibrator, they send it to me
• 50:31
  Speaker 2: or you know whoever whatever brand, And my friend came
• 50:35
  Speaker 2: downstairs and she goes, oh my god, you're never gonna
• 50:37
  Speaker 2: believe this vibrator whatever. It was like it was like
• 50:40
  Speaker 2: a double whoopsiedoodle, like one in your asshole and one
• 50:42
  Speaker 2: of your She goes, this is amazing, this is amazing.
• 50:45
  Speaker 2: She goes, you have to try this, and I'm like, well,
• 50:47
  Speaker 2: I'm not hitting me that, I'm not gonna know all. Like,
• 50:50
  Speaker 2: I let me finish. I said, I am not going
• 50:52
  Speaker 2: to use the vibrator that you used. Are you fucking serious?
• 50:56
  Speaker 2: I looked at my friend, I go, are you you
• 50:58
  Speaker 2: think I'm gonna use your By the way, my friend
• 51:00
  Speaker 2: was here going to medical appointments. She was seeing a
• 51:03
  Speaker 2: bevy of doctors to make sure that she wasn't diagnosed
• 51:06
  Speaker 2: with something very bad. And during that time, I go,
• 51:10
  Speaker 2: at what point during this week of medical appointments did
• 51:13
  Speaker 2: you feel horny?
• 51:14
  Speaker 8: Like?
• 51:15
  Speaker 2: That's what I couldn't understand. So, if there was a
• 51:17
  Speaker 2: used one, my conjecture is that that was hers that
• 51:21
  Speaker 2: she left in the spare bedroom that was wrapped up,
• 51:24
  Speaker 2: probably by my housekeeper, my bell, if she didn't use it.
• 51:26
  Speaker 2: Also because she's also masturbates at the house sometimes, I've
• 51:29
  Speaker 2: been told. And then she sent that to you. And
• 51:32
  Speaker 2: I'm sorry that you got to use vibrator, but I
• 51:33
  Speaker 2: would encourage you to wash it and use it again.
• 51:36
  Speaker 3: You had said, let me finish, like when you got finished,
• 51:41
  Speaker 3: it was all gonna make sense. It was worse the
• 51:45
  Speaker 3: more I let you finish. You mean to tell me
• 51:49
  Speaker 3: you let me? You sent me through the mail? If
• 51:54
  Speaker 3: can somebody google if this is a hate crime, and
• 51:57
  Speaker 3: I want the Post office to get involved.
• 51:59
  Speaker 5: I want you to not Yeah, let's.
• 52:00
  Speaker 3: Get you did tell me, Chelsea that you sent me
• 52:04
  Speaker 3: the vibrator of a bit who was in your grab,
• 52:08
  Speaker 3: who was having current vaginal appointments when a doctor was
• 52:12
  Speaker 3: going on world vagina.
• 52:13
  Speaker 2: No no, not vaginal, not vaginal. No no, no, no, she
• 52:16
  Speaker 2: didn't wasn't saying about a vagina. She was talking to
• 52:19
  Speaker 2: doctors about a different condition that had nothing to do
• 52:21
  Speaker 2: with her vagina.
• 52:22
  Speaker 5: Any condition. I put that ship in my pussy.
• 52:25
  Speaker 2: Bitch, I know, I know you did, and you're going
• 52:27
  Speaker 2: to do it again. What's the last question, Catherine? Do
• 52:31
  Speaker 2: we see? We do we do?
• 52:33
  Speaker 1: Our last question comes from one of our rare straight
• 52:36
  Speaker 1: mail listeners. Dear Chelsea, I recently got an invitation to
• 52:40
  Speaker 1: my ex girlfriend's wedding. We dated for about a year
• 52:43
  Speaker 1: and then had an amicable breakup. We remained friends after
• 52:46
  Speaker 1: we split up, but I feel it odds with going
• 52:48
  Speaker 1: to the wedding because about six months into her relationship
• 52:51
  Speaker 1: with her now fiance, we hooked up a few times,
• 52:54
  Speaker 1: and I don't know if she ever told him that.
• 52:56
  Speaker 1: They've been together for over three years now and he
• 52:58
  Speaker 1: seems great. So I want to be part of her,
• 53:00
  Speaker 1: but part of me feels guilty about being there.
• 53:02
  Speaker 7: Should I go or just blow it off? Thanks Zach.
• 53:05
  Speaker 2: That sounds like a straight man's question. Serious. Wow, we
• 53:09
  Speaker 2: don't get a lot of straight man calling into this podcast.
• 53:11
  Speaker 2: First of all, I really appreciate that because being sensitive
• 53:14
  Speaker 2: to all of those different kind of nuances of what happened. Yeah,
• 53:18
  Speaker 2: I understand feeling weird about that, and I probably would
• 53:21
  Speaker 2: skip the wedding.
• 53:22
  Speaker 5: Here's my thing.
• 53:23
  Speaker 3: If he's going to maintain a friendship with her, and
• 53:26
  Speaker 3: he already has a friendship with her in him, it
• 53:29
  Speaker 3: is going to look weird that he's not at the wedding,
• 53:32
  Speaker 3: So you know, he has to think about that as well.
• 53:35
  Speaker 3: I think he needs to address like what is his
• 53:37
  Speaker 3: feelings for her? You know, because if you still hooking up?
• 53:40
  Speaker 3: What does she feel about this guy? Why are they
• 53:42
  Speaker 3: hooking up?
• 53:42
  Speaker 5: Wow?
• 53:43
  Speaker 2: Well that was that was before they've now been together
• 53:45
  Speaker 2: for like two and a half years. The first six
• 53:46
  Speaker 2: months she said they were He said that they've been
• 53:49
  Speaker 2: hooking up. But Zak, I would say, yeah, I would
• 53:51
  Speaker 2: skip the wedding because, like, the husband.
• 53:53
  Speaker 3: Don't skip his e Really, I'm telling you.
• 53:57
  Speaker 2: If he you know, and like if he knew that
• 53:58
  Speaker 2: someone was there.
• 53:59
  Speaker 5: That she he's friends with them, That's what I'm saying.
• 54:03
  Speaker 2: But the husband doesn't know about them fooling around, right, probably.
• 54:06
  Speaker 3: But if okay, your ex, your friends were now were
• 54:10
  Speaker 3: all friends, and we get married and all of a sudden,
• 54:13
  Speaker 3: your ex who's our friend, is not at our wedding.
• 54:18
  Speaker 3: Oh y'all must have slept together, then that's the first
• 54:20
  Speaker 3: thing I would think. If my partner's ex, who we're
• 54:23
  Speaker 3: all friends with doesn't show up to our web okay,
• 54:26
  Speaker 3: so go you know, yeah, you just know you have to.
• 54:30
  Speaker 5: Go to the wedding.
• 54:31
  Speaker 3: What you need to do is get over that you
• 54:35
  Speaker 3: fucked with her and just move on, because clearly I
• 54:37
  Speaker 3: guess they moving on. They get married and just start
• 54:39
  Speaker 3: a clean slate.
• 54:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's true, that's true. I'm just thinking of the husband.
• 54:44
  Speaker 2: I'm thinking of the husband, like, how would you feel
• 54:46
  Speaker 2: to know that your girlfriend and your wife is someone
• 54:49
  Speaker 2: she was cheating on you with is at the wedding?
• 54:52
  Speaker 5: And I understand that, Chelsea.
• 54:54
  Speaker 3: What I'm saying is, I don't know how if if
• 54:56
  Speaker 3: he's friends with them now, that's because it's all about
• 55:00
  Speaker 3: what the husband's gonna think.
• 55:02
  Speaker 5: Is he ever going to tell him that they did that?
• 55:03
  Speaker 5: He's not going to tell them, So I.
• 55:05
  Speaker 2: Would put you raise a better point. I guess I
• 55:07
  Speaker 2: guess you could sow Zach great. I mean one one
• 55:10
  Speaker 2: piece of advice and then a different piece of advice.
• 55:14
  Speaker 2: Problems problems solved. Problem has been solved.
• 55:19
  Speaker 5: I love you, Chelsea, I really do.
• 55:22
  Speaker 3: I wish I didn't use so many ways you're problematic,
• 55:26
  Speaker 3: but you know I love you.
• 55:27
  Speaker 5: I just really do.
• 55:28
  Speaker 2: I love you too. Okay, that's us for today. Follow
• 55:32
  Speaker 2: Yaminika on Instagram. You guys, please give her love on
• 55:34
  Speaker 2: Instagram so that they stop.
• 55:36
  Speaker 5: Sucking YouTube too.
• 55:37
  Speaker 2: Please just get YouTube and go watch that special. It's
• 55:39
  Speaker 2: really important.
• 55:42
  Speaker 5: And clear your history.
• 55:43
  Speaker 7: Awesome. We'll have fun at the Mammogram you too.
• 55:46
  Speaker 2: Thank you.
• 55:46
  Speaker 5: I'm going to get my boots with that too, was like,
• 55:51
  Speaker 5: thank you.
• 55:52
  Speaker 2: Okay. My remaining dates for Vegas, there are remaining dates
• 55:55
  Speaker 2: for this year. Summertime is coming and I will be
• 56:01
  Speaker 2: in Vegas at the Cosmo doing my residency on August thirtieth,
• 56:07
  Speaker 2: and then November one and twenty ninth. November one and
• 56:11
  Speaker 2: November twenty ninth, I will be in Las Vegas at
• 56:14
  Speaker 2: the Cosmo performing Inside Myself at the Chelsea. It's called
• 56:18
  Speaker 2: Chelsea at the Chelsea for a reason. Okay, thank you.
• 56:23
  Speaker 1: Do you want advice from Chelsea right into Dear Chelsea
• 56:25
  Speaker 1: Podcast at gmail dot com. Find full video episodes of
• 56:29
  Speaker 1: Dear Chelsea on YouTube by searching at Dear Chelsea Pod.
• 56:32
  Speaker 1: Dear Chelsea is edited and engineered by Brad Dickert executive
• 56:36
  Speaker 1: producer Catherine Law And be sure to check out our
• 56:39
  Speaker 1: merch at Chelseahandler dot com