Latest / The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast / How to Have a Wholehearted Holiday (Without the Burnout) | Real Wisdom from the Collective

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How to Have a Wholehearted Holiday (Without the Burnout) | Real Wisdom from the Collective · The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast

• 0:02
  SPEAKER_03: Plans, parties, and presents.
• 0:05
  SPEAKER_03: These days always seem to blur together, don't they?
• 0:08
  SPEAKER_03: But what is Christmas and Advent season really all about?
• 0:13
  SPEAKER_03: Well, for you, the multi-passionate woman who's seeking purpose, Advent is an invitation to take a sacred pause, to refocus on God, on you, and on your people.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_03: Welcome to the 9th annual Wholehearted Advent Podcast Series, sharing wisdom and transformation for the moments that matter most.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_03: Welcome, friend.
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_03: If these last few days have already started to feel a little too full, then I want to invite you to pause, to release the pressure, to make it all happen, and to remember that peace is not something that you produce, it's something that you receive.
• 1:04
  SPEAKER_03: I've gathered my friends, the wholehearted collective coaches, to share one simple soulful tip to help you savor this holiday season rather than just rushing through it.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_03: May their words give you permission to slow down, to breathe a little deeper, and to find joy right where you are.
• 1:27
  SPEAKER_07: Hi, my name is Deanna Sudom.
• 1:30
  SPEAKER_07: I'm a wholehearted coach that utilizes the Enneagram and spiritual guidance tools to help clients move toward transformation and growth in Jesus.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_07: As a type four, I can get overwhelmed from others' emotions mixed with mine during the holidays.
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_07: So I am pre-deciding that being intentional to turn my attention to the Lord will be a part of my wholehearted rhythms.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_07: It can be as simple as a bathroom break or a walk to create some literal space for a few minutes.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_07: I've learned to give myself permission so that I can make that quarter-inch turn toward God and breathe deeply to reset.
• 2:10
  SPEAKER_07: So my prayer for you is that you will be able to set your expectations on the Lord, and he will meet you in the most personal way to be able to give the best of yourself this holiday season.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_07: Psalm 121 reads A Song of Ascents.
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_07: I lift my eyes to the mountains.
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_07: Where does my help come from?
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_07: My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth.
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_07: He will not let your foot slip.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_07: He who watches over you will not slumber.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_07: Indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.
• 2:47
  SPEAKER_07: The Lord watches over you, the Lord is your shade at your right hand.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_07: The sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_07: The Lord will keep you from all harm.
• 2:59
  SPEAKER_07: He will watch over your life.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_07: The Lord will watch over your coming and going, both now and forevermore.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_07: Bless you.
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_02: Hello there.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_02: I'm Jera Nelson Cunningham, a wholehearted coach whose focus is faith-based parenting using attachment science and the Enneagram.
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_02: I'm an Enneogram three who likes to be productive.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_02: So an important part of my holiday rhythm is to slow down and savor Advent and Christmas.
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_02: And since parenting is my specialty, I wanted to share a wholehearted rhythm that can be used with the whole family.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_02: One way that I do that is to read a book that came out when my husband and I started dating way back in the late 90s.
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_02: It's the Christmas story told by each of ten characters from the Bible.
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_02: It's fictionalized with cultural and personal details that make the story of Jesus' birth feel like you were there.
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_02: It makes the familiar Christmas story told in the Gospels come to life.
• 4:05
  SPEAKER_02: The book is The Indescribable Gift by Richard Exley.
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_02: Reading each character's story gives a beautiful picture of what is going on in the world at the time and in that character's mind and heart.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_02: Reading these stories can be done in conjunction with the Advent wreath and maybe even using scripture that corresponds to that character from the Bible.
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_02: The story is fun to read with children, but would also work as part of a devotional time.
• 4:35
  SPEAKER_02: This story helps me to think about what it was like that first Christmas for all of the people involved.
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_02: It shows how ordinary people are an important part of God's extraordinary story.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_02: May you find a new perspective with which to fall in love with Baby Jesus' arrival this holiday season.
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_04: Hi, I'm Gelan Carlson.
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_04: I'm an Enneagram 9 and a wholehearted coach who loves encouraging and cheering on quiet leaders, those who know they're called to lead, even if it doesn't look like the loud, upfront kind of leadership we usually picture.
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_04: My wholehearted rhythm for the holidays is all about prioritizing family memories over things.
• 5:27
  SPEAKER_04: Now that all of my kids are out of the house, I've noticed that my heart has shifted.
• 5:43
  SPEAKER_04: So I try to plan two or three special things that we can do as a big group.
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_04: Something simple but fun.
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_04: Like making sushi together or creating family plates, Christmas plates at the pottery store, or watching Seven Brides for Seven Brothers together.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_04: Now I know this isn't a Christmas movie, but it's the only musical my husband likes, and my girls like the memory of watching it with their dad.
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_04: I've realized for me, presence really does matter more than presents.
• 6:23
  SPEAKER_04: It's easy to get caught up trying to make everything perfect.
• 6:27
  SPEAKER_04: The food, the schedule, the house, but honestly, my family doesn't remember that stuff.
• 6:34
  SPEAKER_04: What they remember are the moments when we all laughed until our stomachs hurt, when we stayed up too late talking, or where we just slowed down long enough to be together.
• 6:50
  SPEAKER_04: And in a lot of ways, I think that's what Advent is about, too.
• 6:54
  SPEAKER_04: It's this invitation to slow down and make space for what really matters.
• 7:01
  SPEAKER_04: God didn't come to us with flash and noise and famefare.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_04: So this year, that's what I want to lean into connection, overconsumption, peace over perfection and togetherness over to do list.
• 7:29
  SPEAKER_04: One verse that speaks to me in this season is be still and know that I am God.
• 7:35
  SPEAKER_04: Psalm 4610.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_04: The holidays are often so full of activity and focused on spending and the perfect gift.
• 7:44
  SPEAKER_04: But this verse is such a good reminder to take a breath, slow down, and notice the moments that matter most.
• 7:56
  SPEAKER_04: So my encouragement for you this season is to make space for what really fills your heart.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_04: Because in the end, those shared moments, those memories, they're the ones that last.
• 8:13
  SPEAKER_00: Hi, my name is Melanie Erickson.
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_00: Born and raised a true Western Canadian, first and foremost, in any gram aide with a strong seven wing, and embodying all the other remaining types at any given moment.
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_00: I am honored to be a wholehearted biblically based coach, committed to following and knowing God the Father, Jesus Christ the Son, the Holy Spirit as three in one, and the ultimate counselor and coach for all of us.
• 8:40
  SPEAKER_00: And that is truly why Christmas is so near and dear to me, as it is time to realize giving is receiving.
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_00: And so I approach Christmas this year, thinking differently about gifts not the kind wrapped in bows or tucked under a tree, but the kind that reach deep into the desires of my spirit and soul.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_00: The gift of peace something I can't buy or earn or manufacture on my own.
• 9:08
  SPEAKER_00: It's a gift freely given from Jesus Himself, lasting peace that comes from being in harmony with God.
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_00: The gift of presence.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_00: Oh no, not shiny boxes decorated with ribbons and cards, but presents being present for myself, to be still, to be attuned to the Holy Spirit and savor the moment to know what truly matters in the here and now and have God with me.
• 9:33
  SPEAKER_00: The gift of celebration, a party like no other.
• 9:36
  SPEAKER_00: It's Jesus' birthday, of course, the greatest gift of all.
• 9:40
  SPEAKER_00: And in celebrating him I'm reminded how God's unlimited grace meets my endless capacity to desire, to wonder, to delight, to be curious about his loving kindness and grace.
• 9:55
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, I love the lights, the pine trees, the aroma of cinnamon clothes and cider, the crackle of a fireplace, the entire beauty of this season.
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_00: But this year I choose to slow down enough, to pause, to breathe in, to still myself, to what truly lifts my soul and to give from that sacred place from within.
• 10:18
  SPEAKER_00: Because true giving begins where peace and presence meet.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_00: Christ in me, the hope of glory.
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_00: Christ in me, the reason to really sing joy to the world.
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_09: Hi, I am Sonia Scott, and I currently live in Thousand Oaks, California.
• 10:39
  SPEAKER_09: My passion is helping families like yours become whole in their identity by using the Enneagram and Storywork.
• 10:46
  SPEAKER_09: I believe the standard for our lives and families is the Bible.
• 10:51
  SPEAKER_09: During the holidays, as a family, we approach the season with worship and honor.
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_09: Starting in November, our worship music transitions to Christmas songs, both secular and non-secular.
• 11:03
  SPEAKER_09: This has been one of my favorite parts of Christmas since childhood.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_09: From Go Tell It on the Mountain to Mary Did You Know, The Little Drummer Boy, and even the classics of Nat King Cole.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_09: Music has always brought me joy and grounded me in the real reason for the season.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_09: I have even been known to turn on some Christmas music in the middle of July.
• 11:25
  SPEAKER_09: This time of year, these songs usher us into the holidays.
• 11:29
  SPEAKER_09: We seek out opportunities to honor God and how He has blessed us as a family.
• 11:34
  SPEAKER_09: Beginning with Thanksgiving, we get the opportunity to serve together at a community center affectionately called a place called home.
• 11:43
  SPEAKER_09: We also invite friends and coworkers to our home for what I like to call the giving thanks meal.
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_09: In retrospect, as an Enneagram 4, I have always idealized these holidays, looking to make them more magical and more traditional and create memories that will last a lifetime.
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_09: However, as I have grown in wholeheartedness, my enjoyment of the holiday has evolved in depth and purpose.
• 12:17
  SPEAKER_10: Hi, I'm Gwen Sledge, a wholehearted coach serving women, especially nurses, as they find peace and purpose through greater self-awareness and deeper faith.
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_10: My wholehearted rhythm for the holidays is this to replace striving with surrender, to plan well and then surrender those plans back to the Lord.
• 12:38
  SPEAKER_10: As an Enneagram 6, I feel most comfortable when I'm prepared.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_10: I love my lists, my schedules, and knowing what to expect.
• 12:47
  SPEAKER_10: But I've learned that no amount of planning can guarantee peace and sometimes all that preparation just feeds anxiety.
• 12:55
  SPEAKER_10: What truly grounds me is meeting with the Lord every morning and asking him this what is most important today?
• 13:04
  SPEAKER_10: That question helps me trade self-protection for trust.
• 13:08
  SPEAKER_10: It reminds me that peace doesn't come from managing the day perfectly, it comes from walking with him faithfully.
• 13:15
  SPEAKER_10: So instead of fighting every interruption, I'm learning to see interruptions as invitations, to love, to rest, or simply to notice his presence right where I am.
• 13:26
  SPEAKER_10: So during the holidays, it's easy to strive for the perfect plan, the perfect moment, or even his perfect love that we already have.
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_10: But the more I surrender, the more space I have to savor what's right in front of me.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_10: A verse that always anchors me is Proverbs 1921.
• 13:52
  SPEAKER_10: So this season, my wholehearted rhythm is this.
• 14:46
  SPEAKER_08: Presence is the foundation of connection, and showing up just as you are is enough.
• 14:52
  SPEAKER_08: So this season, I'm practicing being with people in the way they need most, trusting that God can use even small moments of togetherness to nurture peace and love.
• 15:03
  SPEAKER_08: May you find simple ways to connect each day.
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_08: A shared laugh, a quiet moment, a kind word, and let it be a gift to you and to your loved one.
• 15:18
  SPEAKER_11: I'm Kristen Ye, a type 5 wholehearted coach who walks alongside women to find hope and healing in the midst of difficult circumstances and relationships.
• 15:31
  SPEAKER_11: My wholehearted rhythm for the holidays begins each morning with one quiet question.
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_11: Where do I see God's goodness?
• 15:41
  SPEAKER_11: Right here, right now.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_11: As I've gotten older, I've really come to appreciate the season of Advent.
• 15:50
  SPEAKER_11: It's a focused time of anticipation, of waiting for what is to come.
• 15:56
  SPEAKER_11: Webster's dictionary defines waiting as to stay in place in expectation of staying in place in expectation.
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_11: Waiting is not a passive endeavor.
• 16:13
  SPEAKER_11: It's not just sitting back until circumstances change or relationships improve or prayers are answered.
• 16:22
  SPEAKER_11: Waiting is an active, intentional posture of the heart.
• 16:28
  SPEAKER_11: It's the slow, sacred work of staying open when it would be easier to shut down.
• 16:36
  SPEAKER_11: I've learned that waiting asks something of us.
• 16:41
  SPEAKER_11: It asks for trust, for hope, for surrender, for noticing the goodness of God, even when the story still feels unfinished.
• 16:54
  SPEAKER_11: And that's where gratitude meets me.
• 16:57
  SPEAKER_11: Gratitude becomes the lens that helps me see what is good and true right here, even when I'm still hoping for what's not yet.
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_11: Gratitude doesn't change the circumstances, but it changes me, reorienting my heart back to joy and back to hope.
• 17:23
  SPEAKER_11: Gratitude reminds my forgetful heart that God is already present, already at work in the in-between places.
• 17:34
  SPEAKER_11: He sees me right where I am and beckons me to notice the blessings he gives in the midst of the hard.
• 17:43
  SPEAKER_11: Every morning I make my way down to my favorite chair, take out my journal, and write down three things I am thankful for.
• 17:53
  SPEAKER_11: It's not a flashy time, but it's sacred.
• 17:57
  SPEAKER_11: I reflect on the previous day writing down my gratitude, the beautiful pink clouds I saw on my drive home from work, the moment of laughter with my kids as I was getting ready for bed, and the text from a friend that came at just the right time.
• 18:17
  SPEAKER_11: This practice helps me to notice what's good, notice the blessings, notice the gifts.
• 18:25
  SPEAKER_11: And the more I've practiced gratitude, the more glimmers of goodness I see throughout my days.
• 18:34
  SPEAKER_11: Because what I look for, I see.
• 18:39
  SPEAKER_11: This advent I'm practicing slowing down long enough to see the gifts already in front of me, the ordinary mercies that testify to God's faithfulness, the small reminders that He is near, even here.
• 18:59
  SPEAKER_11: Because gratitude in the waiting keeps me awake to wonder.
• 19:05
  SPEAKER_11: It keeps my heart tender to hope.
• 19:09
  SPEAKER_11: It helps me to see beyond my circumstances to the God who loves me and cares for me.
• 19:16
  SPEAKER_11: So as you move through this season, may you find yourself pausing to notice the light that's already breaking through.
• 19:26
  SPEAKER_11: May your waiting be filled with hope.
• 19:29
  SPEAKER_11: And may gratitude open your eyes to the goodness of God right here, right now.
• 19:42
  SPEAKER_01: Hi, I'm Lori Burge, a wholehearted coach, focusing on healing and soul care retreats.
• 20:07
  SPEAKER_01: Father God, I love you.
• 20:11
  SPEAKER_01: How do you see me right now?
• 20:15
  SPEAKER_01: As I sit quietly, I release all my cares to him and turn my gaze to Jesus, the great lover of my soul.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_01: So this season I want to sit at his feet more like Mary, as she chose the one thing.
• 20:41
  SPEAKER_01: We have so many things that distract us, and we all know the holiday stress and anxiety so well.
• 20:52
  SPEAKER_01: We can get caught up in it all, just like Martha.
• 20:58
  SPEAKER_01: She was so busy serving, she lost sight of Jesus.
• 21:05
  SPEAKER_01: I think the response of Jesus to Martha is the answer.
• 21:11
  SPEAKER_01: One way we can get help from all the stuff swirling around us is to just be with him at his feet.
• 21:20
  SPEAKER_01: It's the best reset I've found.
• 21:25
  SPEAKER_01: So despite the beauty and goodness of the season, we can so easily miss Emmanuel.
• 21:35
  SPEAKER_01: I recommend a morning or an evening pause, even if it's just for a few minutes.
• 21:43
  SPEAKER_01: It is so good for our souls to listen, to wait, to choose, to center on Jesus.
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_01: He is Elroy, the God who sees and deeply.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_01: Cares for us.
• 22:02
  SPEAKER_01: He is so kind and gentle.
• 22:05
  SPEAKER_01: He will wait.
• 22:07
  SPEAKER_01: Will you?
• 22:09
  SPEAKER_01: My prayer for you is that you find space each day to pause and be with Emmanuel this season.
• 22:19
  SPEAKER_01: As Psalm 4610 says, be still and know that I am God.
• 22:31
  SPEAKER_06: Hi, I'm Heather Berg.
• 22:33
  SPEAKER_06: I'm an Enneagram type 7 and a wholehearted coach.
• 22:37
  SPEAKER_06: As a coach, I focus on integrating the Enneagram with internal family systems therapy as well as somatic experiencing therapy.
• 22:45
  SPEAKER_06: My wholehearted rhythm for the holidays has always been about slowing down as much as I can, which is very hard for me if I'm honest, and reflecting on the year that's coming to a close.
• 22:56
  SPEAKER_06: I'm the scribe in my family, which means each year I go through our pictures of the previous 11 months to create our family calendar and write our family Christmas newsletter.
• 23:06
  SPEAKER_06: As an Enneagram seven who tries to fit it all in and who tries to keep emotional pain at bay, which feels like a crash into disappointment waiting to happen, this ritual has become a very healing, eye-opening, and grounding experience for me.
• 23:22
  SPEAKER_06: As I sift through the pictures and go through last year's calendar, I can see just how much we actually did fit into the year and how much I actually did get accomplished.
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_06: However, when I find myself feeling like I missed out or I'm beating myself up for not hitting my idealistic to-do list, this ritual of reflection has become an anchor point for me to get regrounded and re-centered on what's most important.
• 23:49
  SPEAKER_06: Funnily enough, even through the hard years when I felt too stressed or too broken to do anything, especially slowing down to do this particular ritual, I still sensed the Lord inviting me back to this time for the sole purpose of reflection and connecting with Him.
• 24:07
  SPEAKER_06: In fact, there were many years I didn't even send the Christmas letter out because it was not very merry and not happy.
• 24:15
  SPEAKER_06: Interestingly enough, even though the calendar and the Christmas letter highlight our family as a whole, it's become something just for me, a place of healing, a place where I can catch my breath, a place to reflect, and a place to reconnect with the Lord in a very deep and special way.
• 24:33
  SPEAKER_06: Whether this time of year brings you sheer delight or a deep sadness or somewhere in between, my prayer for you is that you can slow down long enough and sense the Lord inviting you into a broad and spacious place where you can feel a sense of his renewal and connection.
• 24:51
  SPEAKER_06: Before you leave here today, I invite you to take in three deep breaths with me.
• 24:57
  SPEAKER_06: Let's inhale together.
• 25:01
  SPEAKER_06: And exhale.
• 25:06
  SPEAKER_05: Inhale, exhale.
• 25:14
  SPEAKER_05: One more time.
• 25:15
  SPEAKER_05: Inhale and exhale.
• 25:24
  SPEAKER_06: Blessings to you, my friend, as you breathe in renewal and breathe out whatever might be making your heart heavy or stressed.
• 25:44
  SPEAKER_03: As you go, friend, may you slow down, savor the moments that matter most, and make space for Christ to meet you right where you are.
• 25:55
  SPEAKER_03: And if you need a little more support this season, you can download the free wholehearted gift giving guide or book a clarity call to help you find peace and presence in your own story.
• 26:08
  SPEAKER_03: Merry Christmas! And remember, your wholehearted story is still being written!