Latest / After 2 Beers / #151 After 2 Beers: Sleep Divorce, Alice Cooper's Recovery through Golf, and Unusual News

Transcript

#151 After 2 Beers: Sleep Divorce, Alice Cooper's Recovery through Golf, and Unusual News · After 2 Beers

• 0:00
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: This program is brought to you by A to B media partners.
• 0:02
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Be sure to listen to the After Two Beers podcast on Spotify, apple iTunes, soundcloud Stitcher and Pocket Casts.
• 0:10
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Also, make sure to visit wwwaftertubeerscom.
• 0:14
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Welcome to the After Two Beers podcast.
• 0:23
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I'm Dutch Dalton, joined as always by Kim and Kebler, and that's me and Michael Puddin Summers.
• 0:29
  Kimi Gibbler: What's going?
• 0:30
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: on.
• 0:30
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Hey, buddy, and we appreciate you guys coming to hang out with us.
• 0:34
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: If you're watching this live, feel free at any time to comment and we'd appreciate you jumping in with us.
• 0:42
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Feel free to like and follow the show.
• 0:44
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: We greatly appreciate that and make sure you share it.
• 0:47
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yes, that's how we're going to grow Sharing is caring.
• 0:53
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: If you haven't watched our show before or listened to the show.
• 0:55
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Basically what we do is we have a couple drinks to get started Hence the name After Two Beers and then we feel like that kind of loosens up the dialogue a little bit.
• 1:05
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: We typically continue to drink more and more beers as we continue and the dialogue gets a little bit more interesting as we go.
• 1:13
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Loosens up the tongue.
• 1:14
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, but the whole point of this is that we're just hanging out, like everybody else does, with your buddies and you're just having a couple beers and you're just bullshitting about whatever just gets you through the day.
• 1:25
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yep, yeah.
• 1:26
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So pull up a drink with us and have a good time, and feel free to jump in and you were about to tell him to pull up a stool, weren't you?
• 1:37
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, Well, that's kind of what the whole thing is right, we're all just sitting around the bar Like we're the best friends.
• 1:42
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: You didn't know you had Pull up a folding chair.
• 1:45
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Wow, On this week's show we're going to talk about, I have a lot of windshield time with my job and I'm really starting to get into listening to lyrics of songs and really trying Like there's a lot of songs that we sing and listen to that we don't really know all the words.
• 2:02
  Kimi Gibbler: Right.
• 2:03
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And then when you actually listen to it, you're like holy shit, I don't even know why I'm saying this out loud.
• 2:08
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I feel bad, that's foul.
• 2:09
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Like I do a radio thing on the weekends and there's a lot of songs that I play that the computer picks.
• 2:19
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I don't pick them, and there's songs that I wouldn't normally play, and so this week Michael Jackson had a song that came up in the queue.
• 2:26
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It was a pretty young thing and the moment I saw that I'm like well, this guy's been screaming about it for decades and nobody picked up on it.
• 2:36
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Well, anyway, I've got another song that it's very popular, especially here in Indiana, that I want to go over with you guys and I want to get your opinion on a lyric, because I think there might be some funny business, some subliminal.
• 2:52
  Kimi Gibbler: Yes, some undertones here, nice.
• 2:55
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, and the Am I the asshole segment.
• 2:58
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It's co-parents and with kids.
• 3:04
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Okay, you know X's you know what I'm saying.
• 3:07
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And one of them gets a new significant other and how that goes over.
• 3:11
  Kimi Gibbler: Like a turn to punch ball oh yeah, gosh, a lot of strutting around.
• 3:15
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: We have Ghibler's Giblets in A to B news.
• 3:18
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It's a freak accident.
• 3:21
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It's a Gardner, his penis and a weed whacker it's where I just fell on it.
• 3:28
  Kimi Gibbler: It's a Gardner, a hoe and a weed whacker yeah.
• 3:31
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It led to his demise.
• 3:32
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Oh yeah, we're going to talk about it Absolutely.
• 3:35
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And have you ever heard of, or have you ever sleep divorced your partner?
• 3:40
  Kimi Gibbler: Oh, I've woke up pissed before you no sleep divorced.
• 3:43
  Kimi Gibbler: Sleep.
• 3:44
  Kimi Gibbler: Divorced yes, it's a term I didn't even know existed, a third of it.
• 3:49
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, like a significant portion of adults do it A third of adults.
• 3:54
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: We're going to talk about what it means to divorce, sleep, divorce your partner.
• 3:58
  Kimi Gibbler: Okay, yeah.
• 4:01
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: All right, if you haven't had a chance, make sure you go out and check out our webpage.
• 4:05
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: After two beers.
• 4:06
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: That's the number to after two beerscom.
• 4:09
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I've been putting a lot of work into it.
• 4:10
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: We've got new stickers that are available that you can go and order on there now.
• 4:15
  Kimi Gibbler: Yeah, so you can get three bucks a piece and they're free shipping.
• 4:19
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It doesn't matter where you're at, I'll send them to you for free, and I've officially added a tip jar so you can literally go and send us a tip.
• 4:27
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So if you're watching and you enjoy the show, feel free to go out there and throw us a tip.
• 4:32
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, I did the pun on there.
• 4:36
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Just the tip I could tell myself, and then we also have our Patreon link.
• 4:40
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So, if you want to be a supporter of the show, I'm trying to come up with a clever name for people that are our Patreon sponsors.
• 4:47
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Like I was thinking of like, instead of pub crawl, it'd be like podcast crawl, but it's so fucking corny I don't want to do that.
• 4:55
  Kimi Gibbler: Maybe you should keep thinking on that.
• 4:57
  Kimi Gibbler: Well, that's my whole point.
• 4:58
  Kimi Gibbler: So if you guys come up with something, let's drink a few more.
• 5:01
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, I need help with that one.
• 5:02
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So anyway, you can do that on our webpage, and I went through and looked at all the interviews we've done over the last five years, which is you know.
• 5:13
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I mean we've been doing this a long damn time.
• 5:15
  Kimi Gibbler: We've done great people on there.
• 5:17
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Right, I mean we're talking some A minus celebrities, in some cases at least, high B's.
• 5:22
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, high B's, it's so you know what we used to do all that.
• 5:27
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Thanks so much to the helium comedy club in Indianapolis that helped us with all of that stuff.
• 5:32
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: But it's so hard to do this job and then do a real job.
• 5:38
  Kimi Gibbler: Right.
• 5:40
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: You know, and so it's.
• 5:41
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I'd love to do the interviews more.
• 5:42
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It's just, it's, it's a time.
• 5:44
  Kimi Gibbler: Yeah, yeah.
• 5:46
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Anyway, okay, we want to make sure we thank all of our current Patreon sponsors Eric, kevin, mike, brad Jordan, debbie, and so thank you to all of you.
• 5:59
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Our buddy, kevin Schuch, here at East Studios, at the Global Media Enterprises, has a phenomenal facility, if you're looking to yeah, if you want to do one of these and come make an ask yourself on the live Facebook and all the other places, feel free.
• 6:14
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: He'll be more than happy to let you do it.
• 6:16
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Absolutely, absolutely, all right.
• 6:20
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Are you guys ready to go?
• 6:21
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I'm ready, all right.
• 6:22
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: We had to get all that out of the way.
• 6:23
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: This is the only way we make money and so far this year we've raised about 200 bucks.
• 6:28
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So you know we're getting there.
• 6:30
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Anyway, it is what it is, all right.
• 6:32
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So I wanted to converse with the two of you, because you both seem to be in the know.
• 6:39
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Okay, tick-tock huge.
• 6:42
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It builds stars out of people.
• 6:44
  Kimi Gibbler: Right.
• 6:45
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: My company just made me take it off my phone yesterday.
• 6:47
  Kimi Gibbler: Really.
• 6:48
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, I'm not allowed to look at it on my cell phone anymore, or?
• 6:52
  Kimi Gibbler: the app at least Okay.
• 6:53
  Kimi Gibbler: So are you a work phone or a?
• 6:55
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: personal phone.
• 6:56
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Well, it's my personal phone, okay, but I have it linked to my work's email, oh you know, and so it's crazy.
• 7:04
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So, anyway, I went and saw the Savannah Bananas.
• 7:10
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I almost read that out oh yes, savannah.
• 7:12
  Kimi Gibbler: Bananas.
• 7:13
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And the reason I brought up tick-tock is these guys basically got huge on tick-tocks.
• 7:16
  Kimi Gibbler: Huge, they did Yep.
• 7:17
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Okay, so I'm in Indianapolis and they had two events back to back.
• 7:22
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Over 14,000 people showed up to watch these guys, and are you guys both familiar?
• 7:29
  Kimi Gibbler: Yeah, I am.
• 7:30
  Kimi Gibbler: It's a hard ticket to get.
• 7:31
  Kimi Gibbler: Oh they're fun, yeah.
• 7:32
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So what do you guys think of these bananas?
• 7:34
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Oh, they're hilarious.
• 7:35
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, I like it.
• 7:36
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It's a good time, it's entertaining.
• 7:38
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I mean I know baseball's kind of picked up to pace lately, but these guys make it enjoyable.
• 7:44
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, it's crazy.
• 7:46
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So I'm watching this thing, right.
• 7:48
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I've been to a lot of baseball games in my life.
• 7:51
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I love minor league baseball.
• 7:52
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Oh, yeah, I went into this.
• 7:54
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I have never seen a single one of their tick-tocks.
• 7:56
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: True story.
• 7:57
  Kimi Gibbler: Really yeah, no.
• 7:58
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I hadn't seen them so I really went into this blind.
• 8:01
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I've kind of seen some like little things AJ would show me or ESPN would like show something going into a commercial.
• 8:07
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: But I really had no idea what this was all about and I picked up on it real fast.
• 8:13
  Kimi Gibbler: It reminds you of like kids playing T-ball, and they're out dancing in the field.
• 8:17
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: No, it didn't remind me that at all.
• 8:18
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I picked up on it real fast, okay, first of all, this is this is all about baseball moms and softball moms that like to look at pretty young guys.
• 8:30
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Okay, but without coming off weird about it.
• 8:34
  Kimi Gibbler: Okay.
• 8:35
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So I'm walking, I'm looking at this crowd and you like you say it was a hard ticket to get.
• 8:38
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: They had people standing five deep in the outfield, which for a minor league baseball stadium, you realize how shitty of a seat that is.
• 8:44
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And these people, they stood in line for hours in the rain to get into this thing.
• 8:50
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So even like I'm sitting there and I'm watching this and I'm like like let's see what this is about, and they have a game that they're doing to like keep keep the fans entertained, and it's called banana in the pants.
• 9:05
  Kimi Gibbler: Oh, okay.
• 9:06
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And all they're doing is they give people in the audience bananas and they have to throw it, or actually, one of them throws it and a guy has to run around and catch it in his pants.
• 9:17
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Okay, so now, granted, these are a lot of kids here.
• 9:21
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It's a very family friendly kind of thing and they're playing a game called banana in the pants.
• 9:26
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Okay, Then, the thing that I still don't understand the very first thing they do, the very first competition, it's the Savannah bananas against the.
• 9:37
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I think they're called the party boys or the party squad or whatever, and it's monkeys.
• 9:43
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Okay, so like it's this you know, great battle between these two.
• 9:46
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And each team sends out a guy who the first thing he does is takes his shirt off, oh yeah, and then just starts posing and they weigh him in and then they do a choreographed dance with no shirt on and I'm like this is fucking magic, why I get a baseball game.
• 10:04
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: This is exactly what it is and this is why these women love this so much.
• 10:09
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And I tell you what I bet you're all Matt Wright fans too.
• 10:11
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: That's I'm telling you, buddy.
• 10:14
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So I'm.
• 10:16
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I'll sum it up like this I saw at least 12 players with no shirt on, and I'm not exaggerating at that number, and I'm also not exaggerating.
• 10:24
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I saw at least four grown ass adults with baseball pants on dry hump the field Like they were doing dance moves that involved dry humping, and I'm like and people are like whoo.
• 10:40
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Like yeah, this is the craziest thing I've ever fucking seen Loving it, but but I got a question have you ever been to Twin Peaks?
• 10:47
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I don't want, but I didn't like it.
• 10:51
  Kimi Gibbler: But I didn't.
• 10:51
  Kimi Gibbler: Oh yeah, hon Get your tits out.
• 10:53
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: But here's the difference I didn't take my kids there and try to convince them it was a family event.
• 10:58
  Kimi Gibbler: No, that's Hooters.
• 10:59
  Kimi Gibbler: Right, right, right.
• 11:02
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: That's Hooters.
• 11:03
  Kimi Gibbler: That's actually really true and that's your real name and phone.
• 11:05
  Kimi Gibbler: Is really true.
• 11:06
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And the wild part is is these, these ball players?
• 11:08
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I mean, they're pretty pretty good ball players, they, some of them, I mean they're not, they're pretty.
• 11:13
  Kimi Gibbler: Yeah, see, that's pretty.
• 11:14
  Kimi Gibbler: That's why I love having honesty on this show.
• 11:18
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: That's what the beer does, yeah right there, it's pretty All right so there you go.
• 11:21
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: That's my review of the Savannah bananas.
• 11:23
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: But you know what I give these guys credit.
• 11:25
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: They're they're playing the game and they're making some money.
• 11:29
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: They seem to be having a great time.
• 11:31
  Kimi Gibbler: Now did you have a great time, though that's what it's about.
• 11:34
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It was hot on hell, it was so hot.
• 11:36
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It was in the middle of the afternoon, they had a rain out, and so it's the very first time that they had ever done it in the day.
• 11:44
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It's typically done at night and I'm sure at night it's really cool, but they do it on the cheap.
• 11:49
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I'll give them credit, like they did fireworks.
• 11:51
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Right, it was just guys coming out holding a rose candle.
• 11:55
  Kimi Gibbler: They were holding a rose candle.
• 11:56
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I'm like man that ain't fireworks.
• 11:58
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It's makes and sparks with money.
• 11:59
  Kimi Gibbler: I used to do that with my buddies in parking lot wars.
• 12:02
  Kimi Gibbler: Right.
• 12:03
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, but anyway they had a good time and if anything, I'm a huge baseball net and if it drives people to following baseball and watching, baseball more, then I'm all for it.
• 12:14
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So there you go.
• 12:15
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Anyway, are you guys ready to jump into this song thing?
• 12:19
  Kimi Gibbler: Yes, all right.
• 12:20
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So I'm driving down the road and I've ruined a lot of songs for a lot of people already, and so I don't know how much I really want to do this.
• 12:29
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I don't think this is going to ruin it, and the song I'm talking about is Jack and Diane OK, by John Mellencamp.
• 12:36
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It came out in 1982.
• 12:39
  Kimi Gibbler: Little bitty, you say yeah.
• 12:40
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: American Fool album and it was number one by a long shot, certified gold.
• 12:46
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And there is a absolutely amazing drummer, kenny Aronoff, that played on that set or that album.
• 12:54
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And if you haven't seen it, there's a documentary called Hired Guns.
• 13:00
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: We talked about it on like four years ago, five years ago, and it's a really good documentary.
• 13:07
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: But so I want to get into the song and specifically, we've got a guy here, tom McGovern, that's playing in the background, that's playing a version of this tune, because I don't have copyright stuff, right, right.
• 13:23
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And so this song is phenomenal really from the aspect that it is absolutely what it's like to grow up in the Midwest.
• 13:30
  Kimi Gibbler: Absolutely Right.
• 13:31
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Right, but I want to talk about one particular.
• 13:34
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Ok, so he says he starts the whole verse off sucking on a chili dog outside the tasty freeze.
• 13:43
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Ok, now let me read the rest of the lyrics and then I want to come back.
• 13:48
  Kimi Gibbler: I like it.
• 13:49
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: He says Diane, this is so funny.
• 13:52
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Diane, sitting on Jack's lap, got his hands between her knees, so he's going right for third gas right there, right on OK.
• 14:00
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: He's right into the song, jack.
• 14:03
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: He says hey, diane, let's run off behind a shady tree.
• 14:06
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Did you know what comes next?
• 14:09
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I heard the song.
• 14:11
  Kimi Gibbler: I can't think of it when I'm hearing the song Right off here Bobby.
• 14:13
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It says dribble off those Bobby Brooks behind and let me do what I please.
• 14:19
  Kimi Gibbler: So what he's singing about is taking your pants off Just going at it.
• 14:25
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: This is behind a tree smashing.
• 14:28
  Kimi Gibbler: Midwest got it.
• 14:29
  Kimi Gibbler: Who hasn't done?
• 14:30
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: that.
• 14:31
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So I'm convinced now that Jack's name for his penis my chili dog, His chili dog.
• 14:37
  Kimi Gibbler: Sucking on a chili dog.
• 14:38
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I think that's what it is Now I looked it up because I wanted to know if I was the only one that ever thought this right, and there was other people that came up sucking on chili dogs being there like eating a bunch of them at once.
• 14:52
  Kimi Gibbler: Ok, ok, yeah.
• 14:54
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And then another one was they have coni sauce on the end.
• 14:56
  Kimi Gibbler: You got to suck that coni sauce off right and I'm lying to sauce.
• 15:00
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I'm like I honestly think that he's singing about Jack's name for his penis.
• 15:07
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: She got it.
• 15:08
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And what's wild is the song right after this on the album it's Hurt, so Good Hurt.
• 15:14
  Kimi Gibbler: So Good, even better my question is you so?
• 15:18
  Kimi Gibbler: What is a pink house, bro?
• 15:20
  Kimi Gibbler: Those are pink shutters.
• 15:23
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Pink shutters, pink curtains, pink curtains.
• 15:26
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: There you go.
• 15:28
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So I have a question for you, mike Do you have a nickname for your dog?
• 15:32
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Do you and your lady friend have a nickname for it?
• 15:36
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Little Puddin?
• 15:37
  Kimi Gibbler: Do you really?
• 15:38
  Kimi Gibbler: I mean no, not really, no, do you?
• 15:40
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: have like as a woman, like your hoo-haws, or your hoo-ha, the main hoo-ha, and then Definitely not chili dog, right, but why is that a bad name?
• 15:51
  Kimi Gibbler: Like give your heartburn, maybe coming home and eating a chili dog.
• 15:54
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I honestly think if you've been in a relationship for a long time, this should be a great couple goal.
• 15:59
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It is for you to go home and name your junk for both of you and just have fun with it.
• 16:06
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And if you want to call it chili dog and call your garage the Tasty Freeze, whatever.
• 16:11
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: But, I think John Mellencamp is singing more about something else in there, but I think it's kind of funny.
• 16:21
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: That is great.
• 16:22
  Kimi Gibbler: I mean, there isn't a whole lot else to do in Indiana, right?
• 16:26
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: This is probably going to piss off your current relationship.
• 16:29
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Have you ever been in a relationship where you had a nickname for certain areas?
• 16:34
  Kimi Gibbler: Well, come to think of it, I don't think I have.
• 16:36
  Kimi Gibbler: I haven't.
• 16:37
  Kimi Gibbler: Oh yeah, I don't think.
• 16:38
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I have either I don't think I have, either.
• 16:39
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: You're fucking boring as hell, I guess.
• 16:41
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: No, we're too busy listening to this song, getting it on Right Right, right Right.
• 16:45
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I would love to hear from the people listening or watching the show if you've got nicknames for your lady parts or man parts or you're the whole deal.
• 16:55
  Kimi Gibbler: So Taco Tuesday.
• 16:57
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Taco Tuesday.
• 16:58
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: You call your dick the Taco Tuesday.
• 17:00
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: No lady parts.
• 17:03
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Oh, I don't know, man, tacos are messy.
• 17:07
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: No, no, no, no, especially the Supreme.
• 17:11
  Kimi Gibbler: They've already.
• 17:12
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So are chili dogs.
• 17:13
  Kimi Gibbler: Right this is true, this is true.
• 17:16
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Chili sauce all over your face.
• 17:20
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: All right, are you guys ready for?
• 17:22
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Am I the asshole?
• 17:23
  Kimi Gibbler: Let's do it.
• 17:24
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: All right, all right.
• 17:25
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Here's the headline that came on Reddit.
• 17:29
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It was am I the asshole for introducing myself to my ex-husband's new girlfriend?
• 17:34
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Oh, this is going to be juicy this is going to be great.
• 17:37
  Kimi Gibbler: Oh, she bypassed.
• 17:37
  Kimi Gibbler: Ok, went right there for it.
• 17:40
  Kimi Gibbler: Went right there for it, went for the introduction, just went to get it herself All right.
• 17:44
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So here's her story.
• 17:44
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: X and I split in April, so that means it sound like this is at least first year.
• 17:50
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: By May he was bringing his new girlfriend to all of my son's 15-year-old son's baseball games.
• 17:57
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Oh yeah, the families were gossiping about it, so she's worried about what everybody else is saying about her husband and my son was uncomfortable with it Because he's playing baseball.
• 18:10
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Of course he's concerned with what's going on in the bleachers.
• 18:13
  Kimi Gibbler: Right, they split in May and he's already got another.
• 18:16
  Kimi Gibbler: No, they split in April, april and April and then in May he's already got Probably the reason for the split.
• 18:21
  Kimi Gibbler: That's what I'm guessing.
• 18:23
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: She also goes on to say my 14-year-old daughter has told me she hated having the new girlfriend around too.
• 18:29
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Of course she did.
• 18:30
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, and my ex wasn't respecting her requests to slow down.
• 18:37
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: After a few times seeing her, I walked up to her and introduced myself.
• 18:42
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: This wasn't about her or my ex, which is complete bullshit, right.
• 18:48
  Kimi Gibbler: Yeah.
• 18:49
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: That's the equivalent of saying this wasn't about the money, I didn't do it for that.
• 18:54
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So your ex, or your current, has an ex that you've had kids and so when you guys that first time, how?
• 19:02
  Kimi Gibbler: is that.
• 19:03
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It is.
• 19:04
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, do you remember it?
• 19:05
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, we didn't talk.
• 19:07
  Kimi Gibbler: No, we just kind of stared at each other.
• 19:09
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Not even he didn't.
• 19:10
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: We just kind of just like we're there, I'm just looking around.
• 19:15
  Kimi Gibbler: Don't make eye contact.
• 19:18
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Don't have a comma.
• 19:19
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: My favorite is when the exes news sends you a friend request on social media.
• 19:24
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Like man, I don't know if.
• 19:26
  Kimi Gibbler: I'm ready to go that route with you, but I've shared everything else with you.
• 19:29
  Kimi Gibbler: I don't know if I want to share my social media with you.
• 19:32
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: No, actually, you took most of it.
• 19:34
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I don't even want to, no.
• 19:35
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: She says this wasn't about her or my ex.
• 19:41
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It was to stop the gossip.
• 19:43
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Show my kids that I'm OK with his relationship and to stop the gossip.
• 19:47
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: She clearly is not OK with the relationship.
• 19:50
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Today, several weeks later, the ex emailed me that I violated his boundaries by doing this.
• 20:00
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Am I the asshole?
• 20:02
  Kimi Gibbler: No, he violated boundaries.
• 20:04
  Kimi Gibbler: If you're bringing her around, then that needs to be a conversation yeah.
• 20:10
  Kimi Gibbler: It's OK for her to introduce herself.
• 20:12
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I thought it was pretty big of her to go, and introduce herself.
• 20:15
  Kimi Gibbler: Yeah, absolutely.
• 20:16
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And that's what most of the people thought as well, that I was reading through the comments that she wasn't the asshole.
• 20:21
  Kimi Gibbler: Right An asshole would have been over there just talking shit about her.
• 20:25
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: He'd mugging her the whole time.
• 20:26
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: You've got to have some fucking balls on you.
• 20:29
  Kimi Gibbler: Right To leave your wife?
• 20:31
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, because obviously she's fine with it.
• 20:33
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Just go over there and be like hey, I'm telling you so.
• 20:36
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Here's some background on it.
• 20:37
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I want to see if this changes anything.
• 20:39
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Ok.
• 20:39
  Kimi Gibbler: Oh.
• 20:40
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: OK, she goes.
• 20:41
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I asked for the divorce so he didn't want to divorce her Right, and so maybe the wife is his way of trying to get back into favor, you know, trying to make her jealous.
• 20:53
  Kimi Gibbler: Oh, then your girlfriend is trying to yeah, yeah, you know what I mean.
• 20:57
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: OK, she goes anyway.
• 20:58
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I asked for the divorce.
• 20:59
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: We had been broken up for a year, but he moved out in April, so they were living together.
• 21:06
  Kimi Gibbler: That's never a good idea, right Never.
• 21:11
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Oh, and she also says I have a boyfriend.
• 21:13
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So she is just as now.
• 21:16
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Hear me out on this.
• 21:17
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: If the boyfriend, if she has a boyfriend, she's clearly inviting him over to the house.
• 21:24
  Kimi Gibbler: Not necessarily, you don't know.
• 21:26
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: How do you have a significant other?
• 21:28
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Well, maybe she.
• 21:29
  Kimi Gibbler: Because they obviously have, like probably, shared custody and when the kids are gone she can yeah if she respects her kid's feelings.
• 21:37
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: She.
• 21:37
  Kimi Gibbler: Kids are gone, you get it all.
• 21:41
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And when they're gone, they're sucking on chili dogs.
• 21:44
  Kimi Gibbler: Sucking on chili dogs?
• 21:46
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Well, maybe that's what it is.
• 21:47
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: She says I'm not jealous of the new girl, it is her monkey circus now.
• 21:52
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So there you go.
• 21:53
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I'm interested to hear what other people think.
• 21:55
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I don't think she's the asshole.
• 21:56
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: No, honestly, you know what I think this is and I thought about this.
• 22:00
  Kimi Gibbler: I think she was being very grown up about it and I think she's probably trying to squash rumors going around the ballpark Just trying to co-parent.
• 22:06
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I honestly think in reality, what it is is let's be straight.
• 22:10
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: The co-parenting part is is like she didn't keep her, the kids, from her.
• 22:16
  Kimi Gibbler: Right.
• 22:18
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: This was what in the animal world they call me walking up and going you bitch Like this is clearly her saying I'm the alpha female here.
• 22:29
  Kimi Gibbler: Right.
• 22:30
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I'm coming to talk to you.
• 22:32
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I'm not afraid of you.
• 22:33
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I don't care what you have to say or what you do.
• 22:35
  Kimi Gibbler: I don't know.
• 22:36
  Kimi Gibbler: Maybe it was something to try to show the kids that it's fine, you don't have to dislike her just because we're not together.
• 22:41
  Kimi Gibbler: She's just trying to intimidate her.
• 22:43
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, no, I call bullshit Because she wrote this OK.
• 22:47
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Think about it.
• 22:48
  Kimi Gibbler: You're making judgments of stuff we don't know yet.
• 22:50
  Kimi Gibbler: Oh, that's the whole point.
• 22:52
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I'm not going to meet these people.
• 22:53
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: That's how the segment works.
• 22:55
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I'm going to say for sure is this, and a good friend of mine, linda Sherrow, I used to work with, said it doesn't matter how thin you cut it, there's always two sides.
• 23:07
  Kimi Gibbler: There's three.
• 23:08
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And well, yeah, and because that's the whole point, we're only seeing this from her side.
• 23:12
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: But it's interesting to me, though, that her timeline doesn't kind of jive, like if they left in April and it was May, but they lived together for a year separated, but they just got divorced.
• 23:27
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It sounds to me, yeah, like that whole thing.
• 23:30
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Right, there was done and she already has a boyfriend too, yeah, so.
• 23:32
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So I think we're only here in one element of it.
• 23:36
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: If they'd been broken up for a year and he's probably going to have his girlfriend for a while.
• 23:40
  Kimi Gibbler: Yeah.
• 23:40
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I don't know man.
• 23:42
  Kimi Gibbler: I think she's full of shit, but that's just my opinion.
• 23:44
  Kimi Gibbler: All right, ghibler, are you ready for your Ghiblets?
• 23:46
  Kimi Gibbler: I'm ready for some Ghiblets.
• 23:48
  Kimi Gibbler: I'm gonna start off with the best one, just because I was absolutely dying laughing at this one.
• 23:57
  Kimi Gibbler: And of course it has to do with flagellants.
• 24:01
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Great.
• 24:01
  Kimi Gibbler: Okay, okay.
• 24:02
  Kimi Gibbler: So did you know that you can be a professional flagellant Like, okay, a professional farder?
• 24:09
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Oh yeah, so keep going, yes.
• 24:11
  Kimi Gibbler: So Joseph Pujol was a professional farder and highest paid performer at the Moulin Rouge.
• 24:16
  Kimi Gibbler: For his grand finale he would play La Marcellais through his anus and then blow out candles from yards away.
• 24:24
  Kimi Gibbler: Corseted women in the audience were known to pass out from laughter.
• 24:30
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It reminds me of Dumb and Dumber when Jim Carrey's character he's thinking of like he's around her and all her friends and they're trying to make her bite laugh and he lights a fire.
• 24:45
  Kimi Gibbler: Oh, yes, I thought it was just amazing.
• 24:48
  Kimi Gibbler: But no, like I actually looked this up, he was born on June 1st 1857, died on August 8th 1945.
• 24:58
  Kimi Gibbler: Better known by his stage name, Le Petomaine French pronunciation he was a French flagellist, professional, farder and entertainer.
• 25:08
  Kimi Gibbler: He was famous for his remarkable control of the abdominal muscles, which enabled him to seemingly fart at will.
• 25:14
  Kimi Gibbler: Have you heard this song that- no, are you serious?
• 25:19
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: There's a song to it.
• 25:21
  Kimi Gibbler: This is what he was famous for doing.
• 25:23
  Kimi Gibbler: This was his finale, right, alright, this is Mar La Marcellais.
• 25:28
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I just butchered it La Marcellais, yeah, yeah yeah, it's fine, but just like listen to the music behind.
• 25:42
  Kimi Gibbler: Where's?
• 25:44
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: his ass.
• 25:44
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: What's part does he do Right?
• 25:49
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Well, I don't have like I wanna hear that.
• 25:52
  Kimi Gibbler: I would love to hear that.
• 25:53
  Kimi Gibbler: Oh, the recording of him farting.
• 25:55
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: His asshole sounds beautiful.
• 25:57
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: What a bassist Is he?
• 25:58
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: A baton For the first few seconds, I'm like oh my god, his farts could bring me to tears.
• 26:09
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So this is just another complete version of the song.
• 26:13
  Kimi Gibbler: That's just a different version of it, but like it started out like oh man, the whole time I'm just reading it just thinking of like I gotta step my game up man.
• 26:28
  Kimi Gibbler: Right.
• 26:29
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I saw a girl one time in Amsterdam with a ping pong ball.
• 26:32
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Hey, you seen her too.
• 26:35
  Kimi Gibbler: Oh man, you know, you don't have to go to Amsterdam to see that.
• 26:40
  Kimi Gibbler: Right, I saw one at the Red Garter.
• 26:43
  Kimi Gibbler: I'm joking.
• 26:43
  Kimi Gibbler: Oh, it was a joke.
• 26:47
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: All right, it's more impressive when they can pick out the number you want.
• 26:53
  Kimi Gibbler: I like a lot of it.
• 26:54
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Like a lot of machines.
• 26:56
  Kimi Gibbler: Like that puts bingo to a whole new extreme, extreme sport bingo.
• 27:02
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: All right, what's your next giflet?
• 27:05
  Kimi Gibbler: All right.
• 27:06
  Kimi Gibbler: So, despite being herbivores, llamas grow a set of fangs when they're between two and five years old.
• 27:15
  Kimi Gibbler: So you guys have seen llamas.
• 27:17
  Kimi Gibbler: Yes, you know those big old teeth on them.
• 27:20
  Kimi Gibbler: They're not to chew food.
• 27:21
  Kimi Gibbler: Males use these as fighting teeth to rip off each other's testicles in order to remain the only fertile male in the herd.
• 27:29
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I like it.
• 27:30
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: God, that makes them so badass, I like it.
• 27:32
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I see a new sticker.
• 27:35
  Kimi Gibbler: I mean, I've seen a few sets of what could have been fighting teeth out here on the streets, but man.
• 27:41
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Why haven't I seen a TikTok of a bike full?
• 27:42
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I want to see a llama biting balls.
• 27:47
  Kimi Gibbler: I bet you you could probably handle this.
• 27:49
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Holy shit.
• 27:50
  Kimi Gibbler: Fighting teeth is what I was just getting.
• 27:52
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Oh my God this should be, at the very least be, a minor league baseball team.
• 27:57
  Kimi Gibbler: The fighting llamas.
• 27:58
  Kimi Gibbler: Oh my, I'm sure if you look hard enough there, they won't take any more than two balls.
• 28:07
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: What does that fight?
• 28:08
  Kimi Gibbler: look like.
• 28:09
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Like the whole time they're trying to get their head around to the other side.
• 28:12
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Anyway, oh my God, just running around in circles.
• 28:17
  Kimi Gibbler: I guess.
• 28:18
  Kimi Gibbler: All right, let's go to the next one.
• 28:21
  Kimi Gibbler: So pioneering shock rocker Alice Cooper credits golf with helping him overcome alcohol addiction and plays the game up to six days a week.
• 28:33
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: That's funny because most golfers I know drink more.
• 28:36
  Kimi Gibbler: That's what I was getting ready to say.
• 28:37
  Kimi Gibbler: I actually contribute golf to alcoholism.
• 28:40
  Kimi Gibbler: I'm going to attribute it to my mini Tourette's.
• 28:43
  Kimi Gibbler: Oh yeah, oh for sure, I don't you know.
• 28:47
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I'm not a golfer that drinks, so when I golf.
• 28:50
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I don't golf very often, but I'm already so shitty at it anyway.
• 28:55
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: The last thing I need to do is fuck with my hand.
• 28:58
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I coordination.
• 28:58
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I did it one time, like when I worked at the parks department, we could go and play for for free.
• 29:05
  Kimi Gibbler: Yeah.
• 29:07
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And I have shorter arms.
• 29:09
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So when, like you're in the passenger seat and you got to bend down to pick the ball up, I'd have to squat down the car and they whip that damn thing and I I somersaulted out of that thing out in the fairway and I'm like man, I can't drink and golf anymore.
• 29:21
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: My problem with drinking and I don't know about you two.
• 29:25
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Like, do you guys day drink Sometimes?
• 29:29
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So when you day drink, do you drink and then you just quit.
• 29:34
  Kimi Gibbler: It just depends Is it quit or pass out?
• 29:36
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Well see, that's my whole thing.
• 29:38
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Like if, when I start drinking, I don't stop drinking until I'm done drinking.
• 29:43
  Kimi Gibbler: Does that make sense, and we all know that Right.
• 29:46
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And so I can't.
• 29:48
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I just can't picture like starting to drink at 10 in the morning and then at two o'clock up.
• 29:52
  Kimi Gibbler: All right.
• 29:53
  Kimi Gibbler: Well, I guess.
• 29:53
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I'll have a nice water.
• 29:54
  Kimi Gibbler: I guess I'll just have a water and maybe cook some steaks on the grill.
• 29:58
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I feel like that's where golf, you know, contributes to it.
• 30:02
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Anyway, no, I mean that's awesome that he found whatever his outlet was.
• 30:05
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I mean that's what you got to do, right?
• 30:06
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: You got to find something that takes your mind off whatever was causing the issues.
• 30:11
  Kimi Gibbler: But I was like you.
• 30:12
  Kimi Gibbler: I was thinking the exact opposite.
• 30:13
  Kimi Gibbler: That's probably caused some alcohol issues for me.
• 30:15
  Kimi Gibbler: Let's see, I thought this one was kind of ironic.
• 30:24
  Kimi Gibbler: Douglas Tompkins, the founder of the North Face, died of hypothermia.
• 30:29
  Kimi Gibbler: I don't think that's on the label of the coat that he sells.
• 30:36
  Kimi Gibbler: That is kind of funny.
• 30:39
  Kimi Gibbler: I mean not funny, ha ha, that he's passed, but you're the founder of the North Face and that's not good.
• 30:50
  Kimi Gibbler: No, no, this one I thought was really cool.
• 30:53
  Kimi Gibbler: Cheetol, a small town in Alberta, canada, is now home to a giant, 20 foot tall Cheeto statue built by Cheetos Canada.
• 31:03
  Kimi Gibbler: The monument celebrates the iconic snack and the dust it leaves on our fingers.
• 31:08
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Nice.
• 31:09
  Kimi Gibbler: I was going to say you know, it's not a real Cheeto, because there would have been dust all over.
• 31:12
  Kimi Gibbler: Maybe that's what's come from Canada.
• 31:15
  Kimi Gibbler: Yeah, the stuff he does to us, that's our air quality.
• 31:17
  Kimi Gibbler: Yeah, it's called the cheese.
• 31:18
  Kimi Gibbler: He's a guy looking at his fingers.
• 31:20
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: That's the only thing about Cheetos like.
• 31:22
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: The moment you start eating them, you're like shit.
• 31:24
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It just gets kicked on there.
• 31:25
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: What did I touch?
• 31:26
  Kimi Gibbler: before.
• 31:27
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Like am I safe to go in for the lick remove or do I need to use an apple?
• 31:31
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: What do you guys do?
• 31:33
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Do you lick?
• 31:34
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Oh, absolutely.
• 31:35
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It doesn't matter where your hands are.
• 31:37
  Kimi Gibbler: Well, it's not like I've been like in my pants or anything and then tried to eat a Cheeto.
• 31:43
  Kimi Gibbler: Crime.
• 31:44
  Kimi Gibbler: And he's saying this adds a little flavor.
• 31:46
  Kimi Gibbler: I have a little bit of tact.
• 31:48
  Kimi Gibbler: My brother-in-law.
• 31:49
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Matt Bezley.
• 31:50
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: He worked at a factory where he sprayed Cheetos or white and he sprayed them.
• 31:57
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: That's what he did for a living, for a summer when college.
• 32:00
  Kimi Gibbler: Sprayed cheese powder, just sprayed cheese powder right A little bit for yourself.
• 32:04
  Kimi Gibbler: Come out with my heat, huff and paint.
• 32:05
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Well, that's what I was getting ready to say you don't have to, let you go, man, did you go down on Big Bird in there?
• 32:09
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: What the hell?
• 32:09
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: That's not going to work.
• 32:10
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Sucking on chili dog, man.
• 32:23
  Kimi Gibbler: Well, you got this orange duster at your nostrils.
• 32:28
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: All right, that's a good one.
• 32:31
  Kimi Gibbler: All right, let's see, if a mosquito is biting you and you flex that muscle, it will explode you got to have muscles for it, right I?
• 32:44
  Kimi Gibbler: Know I'm like oh crap, they don't ever bite where I've got any muscle.
• 32:48
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: They've got to get into the muscles, the hard part.
• 32:50
  Kimi Gibbler: But I need somebody to do this test.
• 32:53
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: People are going to be doing it like why isn't it happening?
• 32:55
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Because you got like me, it's like Mine.
• 32:58
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Get drunk Right, unless that mosquito has an eight inch nose.
• 33:02
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: How do?
• 33:06
  Kimi Gibbler: they find this shit out Right Like.
• 33:09
  Kimi Gibbler: Who does this?
• 33:09
  Kimi Gibbler: Like, oh, it's pink.
• 33:11
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Oh man, I can see kids getting in shape just to do this shit.
• 33:15
  Kimi Gibbler: Right.
• 33:18
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: All right, you got one more, I got one more, All right.
• 33:21
  Kimi Gibbler: Have you ever heard of the word rumble strutting?
• 33:24
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: No no.
• 33:26
  Kimi Gibbler: Okay, rumble strutting is a guinea pig behavior in which they strut around each other, shaking their butts low to emit a rumbling sound.
• 33:35
  Kimi Gibbler: It can sound a lot like purring, but it's part of their herd rituals to determine dominance.
• 33:40
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Speaking of the ping pong, that's just like when clapping that ass, dropping it low, oh class that ass.
• 33:50
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It all comes from animal behavior.
• 33:52
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It's like shake your tail, feather man Right, they're out there just purring with their ass.
• 33:58
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: That's talent.
• 34:00
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I like it that is moving the ass cheeks.
• 34:02
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yes, all right.
• 34:04
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Are you guys ready for some news?
• 34:08
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Let's do it All right, we got two news stories tonight.
• 34:11
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: The first one comes to us from Thailand.
• 34:16
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I feel like.
• 34:16
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: A Thai gardener has reportedly bled to death I'm sorry In a freak accident after cutting off his penis with a grass trimmer.
• 34:28
  Kimi Gibbler: Here we go.
• 34:29
  Kimi Gibbler: Here's a fellow, a grass trimmer.
• 34:30
  Kimi Gibbler: Yes, so I thought Thailand, they were smaller.
• 34:36
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: That's what it must be a very good grass trimmer.
• 34:39
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Now I read into this night First.
• 34:41
  Kimi Gibbler: my first thought was you know how to trim the bushes Well.
• 34:46
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I feel like it probably had a clog, and so he turned it over and he pulled it up and he's looking at it, and then it kicked in and it scissored his shit off.
• 34:56
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Right, that's what I thought.
• 34:57
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Now I'm not even going to try to say his name, but he was found dead with his pants and legs soaked in blood in a forest park in northeastern Thailand.
• 35:08
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: The 39 year old was tending a patch of grass when the lawnmower blade flew off and severed his penis, causing severe bleeding.
• 35:19
  Kimi Gibbler: Now I've got to say the lawnmower blade yeah it's probably like so.
• 35:23
  Kimi Gibbler: I thought you said a weed eater.
• 35:25
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It is.
• 35:25
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Sometimes you'll put a blade on there because if you're going into a real heavy brush, oh, I know what you're talking about, so ironically, it sounds like you didn't secure the nut no.
• 35:34
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: But so he busted the nut, he busted more nut.
• 35:39
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Now here's all the jokes that I've.
• 35:41
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I was thinking about all this today, right?
• 35:43
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: This is what I do at my windshield time.
• 35:45
  Kimi Gibbler: This is our dark humor section, yeah yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 35:48
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So I thought this guy.
• 35:49
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Clearly either God hated this guy or somebody's wish just came true.
• 35:55
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Really, that blade just happened to fly off and cut off your junk.
• 36:01
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And how do you die from it?
• 36:03
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Nobody sees it.
• 36:03
  Kimi Gibbler: Well, I'll tell you how you die, because you've got so much blood rushing there have you ever shaved your area and cut it?
• 36:09
  Kimi Gibbler: Oh yeah.
• 36:11
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: OK, it bleeds like a stuck hog man.
• 36:14
  Kimi Gibbler: Yeah, it looks like a Tarantino movie.
• 36:16
  Kimi Gibbler: The toilet paper man.
• 36:17
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I got the toilet paper on it.
• 36:18
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Toilet paper, you got to put a roll on it.
• 36:20
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It looks like the shining when the blood comes down the hallway I did.
• 36:27
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I'm not surprised at all that he died from bleeding out.
• 36:33
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Now here's the question and I'd love to get some people on the listeners on this too, and I'm serious about this.
• 36:40
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So you die and your dick is laying next to you.
• 36:44
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Ok, you pick it up.
• 36:46
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: No, you're dead.
• 36:47
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I'm asking what do you want done with your dick and you?
• 36:50
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: That's all getting cremated.
• 36:53
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: OK well, let's say it's not getting cremated Science, science.
• 36:56
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Well, I thought about this.
• 36:58
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Ok, now my first thought is you probably should have it buried with you, right, right?
• 37:04
  Kimi Gibbler: Yeah, just in case you reincarnate.
• 37:06
  Kimi Gibbler: You don't want to be, you got to.
• 37:07
  Kimi Gibbler: Yes, so that thing back on.
• 37:08
  Kimi Gibbler: In a hundred years from now, what?
• 37:10
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: happens if they come back and they, like, are able to bring you back to life and you have no junk right, and that's the first thing.
• 37:17
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: You're like man, I don't know, you know, if you want me to bring you back now.
• 37:19
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So my question is.
• 37:21
  Kimi Gibbler: I don't know.
• 37:21
  Kimi Gibbler: Maybe they can buy a hundred years from now, though they'll be able to put new, improved junk on there, maybe, but you don't know.
• 37:29
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So where would you want your junk at?
• 37:31
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Would you want it like in your pocket, yes, or would you want it like I think you don't maybe on the pillow, no?
• 37:39
  Kimi Gibbler: I want it in the pocket.
• 37:39
  Kimi Gibbler: Looking at you.
• 37:42
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I want it in the pocket of my shoe.
• 37:43
  Kimi Gibbler: It should be looking for your shoe Instead of a handkerchief, it's my little pee pee stick in that stuff.
• 37:47
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, now I've thought about this and this is what I want.
• 37:52
  Kimi Gibbler: OK, a little handkerchief over, and it's a little, it's a ghost and I think.
• 37:57
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I think it's earned it OK you're putting it in an earn.
• 38:00
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I want a separate ceremony just for it.
• 38:03
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: No, ok, now hear me out on this.
• 38:06
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Right, it's going to have like a little box and it doesn't have to be lowered as far down right, right, and I'd love for people to play like Dick in a box, but on bagpipes, right, and I don't know what it would look like yet.
• 38:22
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: But if someone did like a twenty one skeet salute, if it's just like seven dudes, off to the side you know and skeet, skeet, skeet, skeet not with their junk, literally.
• 38:36
  Kimi Gibbler: So they actually already have a ceremony for when your, your dick dies.
• 38:41
  Kimi Gibbler: It's called a wedding.
• 38:46
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: No, my good friend, that's.
• 38:48
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Your dick doesn't die, it just loses its use.
• 38:51
  Kimi Gibbler: It just doesn't get used like a chili dog, right?
• 38:53
  Kimi Gibbler: All right, no more sucking on chili dogs.
• 38:56
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I could tell you, you might be pounding one out but you're going to be sucking on that chili dog, not on that chili dog.
• 39:01
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: What would you use as a casket?
• 39:04
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Would you use like just a cigar box?
• 39:08
  Kimi Gibbler: Cigar box, I was going to say like a condom box, an empty condom box or something.
• 39:12
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I was thinking, maybe a flashlight.
• 39:14
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I mean, it's perfect, it's designed right for it, it feels like it would give it ample protection at all sides.
• 39:20
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And this is true.
• 39:22
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I want to know Should it get its own little grapes like headmarker?
• 39:27
  Kimi Gibbler: No, no, no, Headmarker, little headstone, and it does.
• 39:33
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I'd want it in my like a note in my pocket.
• 39:35
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Your dicks hanging out next to you Just to make sure Pants are on suit Well.
• 39:39
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I feel bad for this guy.
• 39:41
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: But there you go.
• 39:43
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Be careful.
• 39:44
  Kimi Gibbler: Maybe wear like some metal sheet around your neck when you're right, didn't know you had to wear like a full cup or anything, golly.
• 39:52
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: That's the worst part about the Internet, honestly is, if you die in a stupid way, the world will know.
• 39:58
  Kimi Gibbler: Everybody will know Right.
• 40:00
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Like this is the kind of thing this guy hoped would stay to a village.
• 40:03
  Kimi Gibbler: Yeah, they'll just say he got into a lawn incident.
• 40:06
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, now three guys, three, three people are sitting around in Indiana talking about his dick.
• 40:11
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, there you go.
• 40:13
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: All right, here's our second and final story for tonight, and this is one that I'm interested in.
• 40:20
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: More than a third of Americans say they occasionally or consistently sleep in another room from their partner, according to a survey from the American Academy of Sleep Medicine one third of people.
• 40:33
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Third, the practice of sleep excuse me, sleeping separately is known as sleep divorce and is meant to help you fall asleep and stay asleep without disruptions.
• 40:43
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: OK such as snoring and stolen covers and early alarms.
• 40:48
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So my question is have you guys ever, or in current state, slept divorced?
• 40:55
  Kimi Gibbler: No, you know, I mean, I've debated it a few times, you've never got up in the middle of the night, not one time.
• 41:01
  Kimi Gibbler: And one to the other?
• 41:02
  Kimi Gibbler: No, because I'm the snorer.
• 41:04
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Oh has he.
• 41:05
  Kimi Gibbler: No.
• 41:05
  Kimi Gibbler: No he's got a whole half of a bed to himself.
• 41:09
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It's me and the dogs over on the other side.
• 41:11
  Kimi Gibbler: Yeah so on logs.
• 41:12
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Well, I'm going to tell you right now that other half of the bed probably doesn't stop the noise from the story.
• 41:18
  Kimi Gibbler: That's what this is all about most of the time, but yeah there's a amber snore.
• 41:23
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: No, I'd be the snorer.
• 41:24
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Does she ever get up and go?
• 41:26
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: No, really, yeah, aj, and I really don't either.
• 41:29
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I mean, it's not snoring related, it's only gastro problems.
• 41:33
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And one of us right yeah it's more of going to sleep and buy it.
• 41:37
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: But I was interested by it because I was doing some research on it, because I wondered how many marriages have ended solely because of snoring.
• 41:48
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Right, and I?
• 41:49
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Somebody said that the third cause of divorces is snoring, which I don't buy.
• 41:55
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I don't buy that one.
• 41:56
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: But it said one in six have considered leaving their partner because of snoring.
• 42:02
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I believe it.
• 42:03
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, that's a lot, that's have you.
• 42:08
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Have you?
• 42:10
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: No, I'm the snorer.
• 42:12
  Kimi Gibbler: I'm the snorer.
• 42:14
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: They surveyed 2000 adults in the United States and found that 43% of millennials engage in sleep divorce, followed by 33% of Gen X, 28% Gen Z and 22% of baby boomers.
• 42:30
  Kimi Gibbler: Wow, that's crazy.
• 42:31
  Kimi Gibbler: Yeah, honestly, I sleep bad.
• 42:33
  Kimi Gibbler: I don't sleep well, unless I know that he's home in a bed, right, right, I don't know, I just I'm shocked at millennials.
• 42:42
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It's.
• 42:42
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It's not in a bad way.
• 42:43
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: It's the game is changing the world is changing yeah.
• 42:47
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I just read a statistic that half of 40 year old men have never been married.
• 42:53
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Wow, in, I think it was in the Northeast, but regardless it's it's, people aren't getting married like they were.
• 43:01
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, and now these people are saying, hey, I love having a relationship with you.
• 43:07
  Kimi Gibbler: I just can't as long as you're in the other room or just in a separate bed.
• 43:11
  Kimi Gibbler: Yeah, because there's people that have restless leg syndrome and I just, I don't know, I'm so Well, and then there's also like I mean there's people that like some spouses and they work on different time schedules.
• 43:24
  Kimi Gibbler: Yeah, you know, like sometimes, like the husband has a third shift job and then when he's on the weekend and sleeping with her, they probably both don't get the same type of sleep because they're not used to sleeping with somebody.
• 43:37
  Kimi Gibbler: Yeah, yeah.
• 43:38
  Kimi Gibbler: So I mean, I don't know, I can see it, but I don't think it would necessarily always cause divorce Crying out loud.
• 43:47
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, this door.
• 43:49
  Kimi Gibbler: Well, I'm telling you.
• 43:51
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: You've had people wake up and they haven't had a good sleep.
• 43:54
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: You may not be directly snoring, but it can be indirect.
• 43:58
  Kimi Gibbler: They're not.
• 43:59
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So an elbow is a shit.
• 44:00
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: All right, all right, guys.
• 44:04
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Have you enjoyed the show?
• 44:05
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I enjoyed.
• 44:06
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I appreciate it I hope you guys listening and watching have enjoyed the show again.
• 44:11
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Make sure you check out our webpage.
• 44:12
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: After two beers, that's a number two.
• 44:14
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: We've made some changes.
• 44:16
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: There.
• 44:16
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: You can find lists, a list of interviews that we've done, and I'm also going to break down history eventually too, and in scope that out.
• 44:25
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: And then, as we get new stickers, I've actually ordered our logo again and know me, the clown in a bigger size.
• 44:32
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: So those would be on the webpage soon and we'll keep updating stickers there as well.
• 44:38
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: We have a meme going out.
• 44:40
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: We, when we first started, we did so well on Facebook.
• 44:44
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: We had almost a hundred thousand followers in the first year, yeah, and we would put out a meme and within a day would have half a million views, and it's never happened again after we had TJ Miller on, after we got Zuckerberg and he badmouthed Zuckerberg.
• 45:00
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Well, something's happened again.
• 45:01
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: We posted one and before we started we're at almost half a million impressions.
• 45:07
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Nice, so maybe we're starting to grow.
• 45:10
  Kimi Gibbler: Yeah, your ban has lifted.
• 45:11
  Kimi Gibbler: And I mean, people are just.
• 45:13
  Kimi Gibbler: It's so controversial.
• 45:15
  Kimi Gibbler: We're not meaning that we're out littering for crying out loud, it's just a joke.
• 45:19
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Oh geez.
• 45:20
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Well, I have no concerns over people that get butt hurt over a meme.
• 45:24
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, Over a picture.
• 45:26
  Kimi Gibbler: I've got a lot of shit.
• 45:27
  Kimi Gibbler: Is this your first time on the internet?
• 45:28
  Kimi Gibbler: Right?
• 45:29
  Kimi Gibbler: If that's what gets it, that's what's missing you off.
• 45:32
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: That's what you're getting mad about you better hit the power button.
• 45:35
  Kimi Gibbler: Yeah, you better listen to our podcast a time or two.
• 45:39
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Well, thank you again to our Patreon sponsors.
• 45:41
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: All of you, we greatly appreciate it.
• 45:43
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Thanks to anyone that's bought stickers.
• 45:45
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: We've had people go out and buy stickers already.
• 45:47
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, and if you enjoy the show, feel free to go to the tip jar for as little as a dollar.
• 45:53
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I set it up.
• 45:54
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: One dollar, one dollar.
• 45:55
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I call it.
• 45:57
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: What do I call it?
• 45:58
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Dollar, like well shots or something.
• 46:00
  Kimi Gibbler: I had to come up with something clever.
• 46:02
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Anyway, you can go ahead and do a donation, but if you want to order some stickers, there are three bucks a piece, free shipping, and we can get those out as early as next day.
• 46:12
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, and I guess without further ado.
• 46:16
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: We say that at the end of every show and it is the most important thing we say if you see someone out there that you think is struggling, they probably are, do me a favor and just reach out to them, ask them how they're doing, how their week is going, or just ask them how was your day?
• 46:30
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Absolutely, you'd be surprised how something so small might mean the absolute world to somebody, just a simple little gesture.
• 46:36
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: There you go.
• 46:37
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: That's all it takes.
• 46:38
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: All right, we will talk to them all.
• 46:40
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I guess next time, Gibliff.
• 46:42
  Kimi Gibbler: After two beers Yay, two days.
• 46:46
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Yeah, it's time to get on up now.
• 46:49
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I'm so busy today.
• 46:51
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Check it out with your little eye.
• 46:55
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: Hey, you're doing the whole thing.
• 47:01
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I need help.
• 47:03
  Chris “Dutch” Daulton: I need the help from some of my friends now.