Latest / INSPIRE STORY / #0139_ STORY INSPIRE: Let’s Take a Beat: A Moment to Pause, Reflect & Reset
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: Ladies and gentlemen, sorry, we had a Han Dynasty Chinese food,
- 0:07Speaker 1: and it's spicy. Ben loves Chinese food. It's his favorite
- 0:11Speaker 1: kind of food. It makes him feel. Very few things do.
- 0:18Speaker 1: You would say it's your favorite food by far.
- 0:20Speaker 2: By far.
- 0:20Speaker 1: Is Thai food more than Chinese food?
- 0:23Speaker 3: I would say it's Chinese and then Japanese kind of
- 0:26Speaker 3: in a Thai right there.
- 0:27Speaker 1: Interesting. It's all East Asian. I mean, Eastern.
- 0:31Speaker 2: Eastern world, yes.
- 0:32Speaker 1: Phenomenal. That's great. I like Chinese. I don't, you know,
- 0:37Speaker 1: I mean, I'm a, you know. I don't, I don't know.
- 0:41Speaker 1: It's not my favorite, you know, because I'm a civilized person.
- 0:46Speaker 1: So I don't eat chicken feet and stuff, but I
- 0:48Speaker 1: don't mind it. I like countries with tablecloths. Welcome to
- 0:53Speaker 1: the alt-right Nazi food hour. Thank you for coming, and
- 0:59Speaker 1: this is when we... I'm watching a show on HBO
- 1:03Speaker 1: right now called The Gilded Age, which isn't good, but
- 1:06Speaker 1: it's not bad. And it's about all these old money
- 1:10Speaker 1: families in New York that are being displaced by new
- 1:16Speaker 1: money families, and it's about a family that's supposed to
- 1:21Speaker 1: be the Vanderbilts because it's a railroad tycoon and his wife,
- 1:24Speaker 1: and they're trying to break into... old New York. And, um,
- 1:30Speaker 1: you see in the show, how bad the Irish had it,
- 1:33Speaker 1: you know, everybody, we always hear about, you know, uh,
- 1:37Speaker 1: you know, uh, slaves, but we never hear about Irish slaves.
- 1:42Speaker 1: And there were like a ton of them. And that's
- 1:46Speaker 1: what my podcast is now about telling the story of
- 1:50Speaker 1: Irish slaves. Um, But, you know, one of the maids
- 1:55Speaker 1: is Irish. She's like a gambler. And a guy's just
- 1:58Speaker 1: beating her up and throwing her on the street trying
- 2:01Speaker 1: to get his money. But now, you know, HBO's got
- 2:03Speaker 1: to force all these storylines. They got to force diversity.
- 2:06Speaker 1: So you have like a black character who, you know,
- 2:09Speaker 1: it's just you're watching this thing. A girl gets robbed.
- 2:13Speaker 1: The black lady lends her money. And then she goes
- 2:16Speaker 1: to this, you know, rich family in New York. And
- 2:21Speaker 1: then they just take her in. So here's what you
- 2:25Speaker 1: have to believe now. You have to believe that America
- 2:28Speaker 1: was this stunningly racist, horrible society, which there's a lot
- 2:33Speaker 1: of merit to that belief, but you also have to
- 2:36Speaker 1: suspend that belief to enjoy a show where they just
- 2:42Speaker 1: move a black woman into the home within two days
- 2:46Speaker 1: of meeting her because you need the diversity in this show.
- 2:51Speaker 1: So it's like the craziest storyline ever. It's like, oh, yeah,
- 2:55Speaker 1: she lent me money to get on the train. And
- 2:57Speaker 1: then she gets there and they're like, oh, you can
- 2:59Speaker 1: dictate my letters. You can read or write. Live with us.
- 3:03Speaker 1: Live with us and be a principal character on the show.
- 3:06Speaker 1: And that's where the diversity start going. It's odd. I'm
- 3:12Speaker 1: all for having another black family on the show in
- 3:15Speaker 1: Brooklyn where it's believable. Where it's not like you're not
- 3:19Speaker 1: forcing this thing that would really just never happen. In
- 3:24Speaker 1: my estimation. I'm not saying it's never happened. But the
- 3:28Speaker 1: idea you have this old money New York rich family
- 3:32Speaker 1: just taking in this black girl after knowing her for
- 3:36Speaker 1: less than 24 hours. Just live here. Just live here.
- 3:41Speaker 1: It's odd. But again, this is part of the new.
- 3:47Speaker 1: Ethos in Hollywood where even if it doesn't make sense,
- 3:51Speaker 1: just do it. Just throw it in and no shade
- 3:55Speaker 1: to anybody. Hey, get your money. I'd rather watch a
- 4:00Speaker 1: show where there's a black family experiencing truly what it
- 4:04Speaker 1: was like in that era than that forced storyline, uh,
- 4:11Speaker 1: that we're seeing, which clearly seems to be, uh, uh,
- 4:16Speaker 1: Not what would have happened. Or maybe I'm wrong. But
- 4:20Speaker 1: it doesn't seem to be... Like, the whole show is
- 4:24Speaker 1: about this woman being terribly uncomfortable with her white neighbor.
- 4:28Speaker 1: That's the entire show is about these two women who
- 4:30Speaker 1: are just, you know, one's old money, one's new money,
- 4:33Speaker 1: and they don't get along. The new money one is
- 4:36Speaker 1: garish and vulgar. She's a vulgarian. And the old money one,
- 4:40Speaker 1: Christine Baranski, doesn't like her. Now, we're supposed to believe that.
- 4:44Speaker 1: She's terribly uncomfortable with, but she moves in the black
- 4:48Speaker 1: girl in under 24 hours and goes, come live in
- 4:51Speaker 1: the house. Late 1800s, by the way. Civil War is
- 4:56Speaker 1: ended hours ago. And we're supposed to believe she just, oh,
- 5:00Speaker 1: just come on in the house. The whole show is
- 5:03Speaker 1: about she hates different classes of white people who have money.
- 5:07Speaker 1: They have more money than her. It's not even a bet.
- 5:11Speaker 1: It's just the whole show is about how you hate
- 5:13Speaker 1: the other. Like, you just, there are, people are tribal
- 5:17Speaker 1: by nature, and people hate disruptions, and they hate change,
- 5:22Speaker 1: and she hates this woman who lives across the street
- 5:24Speaker 1: who has real money, and her husband's this, you know,
- 5:27Speaker 1: brash railroad tycoon who's a, you know, big money player
- 5:31Speaker 1: in New York, and she's terribly uncomfortable with that, and
- 5:33Speaker 1: she doesn't like it, but she moves into Black Girl,
- 5:38Speaker 1: and we're supposed to just... you know, kind of ease
- 5:42Speaker 1: past that, what seems to be a glaring contradiction because
- 5:47Speaker 1: HBO needs to do that now. And you go, okay,
- 5:54Speaker 1: all right. It's also whatever the show is, nobody asked
- 5:58Speaker 1: for the show either. Nobody was like, you know, because
- 6:04Speaker 1: the guy who made it did Downton Abbey, which a
- 6:05Speaker 1: lot of people loved, my grandmother loved it, which was
- 6:08Speaker 1: like a show about British aristocracy, and he's doing it
- 6:15Speaker 1: for America, for New York. But, you know, nobody was
- 6:21Speaker 1: pounding on the door saying, please, God, make a show
- 6:27Speaker 1: about this. And not only have they made a show
- 6:31Speaker 1: about it, but they've made a show about it where
- 6:34Speaker 1: one of the key plot points, to me, feels a
- 6:38Speaker 1: bit ludicrous. Or maybe it wasn't that racist. Maybe those
- 6:45Speaker 1: old white women who lived on Fifth Avenue weren't that bad.
- 6:49Speaker 1: That's kind of what you have to deduce. You have
- 6:53Speaker 1: to go, she's not that bad. There's a black girl
- 6:56Speaker 1: living in a house. That's lovely. I'm sure that's not
- 7:01Speaker 1: a common thing. Again, you can't have it both ways,
- 7:08Speaker 1: you know? The country was horribly racist. I'm with you there.
- 7:12Speaker 1: I agree with that. I think you're right about that.
- 7:15Speaker 1: But this old bitch loved this black woman and moved
- 7:21Speaker 1: her in in under 24 hours, having not even known her.
- 7:24Speaker 1: Moved her right in. Oh! And that's the show. Just
- 7:29Speaker 1: go with it. Just go with the show. And you go, okay.
- 7:36Speaker 1: I was reading about You know, I'm trying to, you know,
- 7:41Speaker 1: the diet that we're all being fed right now was war.
- 7:45Speaker 1: It's just a steady diet of Ukraine war. And it's unhealthy.
- 7:53Speaker 1: It's unhealthy. The TV just went on. It's unhealthy to
- 7:59Speaker 1: just hear about the war. I'm not saying it's unimportant.
- 8:04Speaker 1: I'm not saying it doesn't matter. I'm saying there's how
- 8:07Speaker 1: many explosions should you watch? It's a fair point. It's
- 8:13Speaker 1: a fair question, right? How many buildings should you watch
- 8:18Speaker 1: being shelled before you have coffee? Four? Because we are
- 8:25Speaker 1: now being fed a steady war diet. The troops are advancing.
- 8:33Speaker 1: They may launch an amphibious assault on Odessa. They are
- 8:39Speaker 1: in the Black Sea. The convoy has been stalled on
- 8:45Speaker 1: the way to Kyiv, which everyone has pronounced Kiev, and
- 8:49Speaker 1: now it is Kyiv, whatever. People on Twitter are fighting.
- 8:55Speaker 1: Is Vladimir Putin a rational actor, acting in his self-interest style?
- 9:01Speaker 1: after being goaded into the war by the expansion of NATO,
- 9:05Speaker 1: there's something to that, for sure, certainly. And the other side,
- 9:11Speaker 1: or is Vladimir Putin a psychopath who's behaving erratically, which
- 9:19Speaker 1: there's also room for that, because when you look at
- 9:23Speaker 1: what he's going to have to do with Ukraine, have
- 9:24Speaker 1: a military presence there for a long time, bleed his
- 9:28Speaker 1: country there, bleed his country dry financially, have, you know,
- 9:34Speaker 1: to deal with an insurgency situation for as long as
- 9:38Speaker 1: they're there. Ukrainians are never going to forget about this.
- 9:42Speaker 1: It's not like he could just install a puppet government
- 9:44Speaker 1: and be done. This is a real project. We just
- 9:47Speaker 1: got done with this in Iraq and Afghanistan. How did
- 9:50Speaker 1: it work out for us? We were humiliated. The Taliban
- 9:55Speaker 1: came back 20 years later, but a lot of people
- 9:59Speaker 1: made a lot of money in that period I'm not,
- 10:01Speaker 1: you know, naive But these things don't usually work So,
- 10:08Speaker 1: a cost-benefit analysis of this But I think he was like,
- 10:11Speaker 1: listen I'm in my 70s There's rumors that he has
- 10:15Speaker 1: Parkinson's He's like, hey He's concerned with his legacy. He goes,
- 10:19Speaker 1: I'm not going to let you put missiles all around Russia.
- 10:22Speaker 1: I'm just not going to do it. I'm a nuclear power.
- 10:25Speaker 1: We have more nuclear warheads than anybody else. I'm going
- 10:27Speaker 1: to act like it. There's a great line in Succession.
- 10:31Speaker 1: What good is having fuck you money if you can't
- 10:34Speaker 1: say fuck you? And I think Putin goes, well, what
- 10:37Speaker 1: good is having all these goddamn nukes? Just so what?
- 10:41Speaker 1: I could talk to Oliver Stone. No, I want to
- 10:44Speaker 1: party too. America's running around the middle East, pretending they're
- 10:48Speaker 1: democratizing things. And they ain't, you know, Israel's, you know,
- 10:53Speaker 1: with Palestine, the whole thing, Saudi Arabia is doing a genocide,
- 10:58Speaker 1: genocide in Yemen. Why don't I get involved? I feel like,
- 11:05Speaker 1: you know, he feels like, Hey, you're not gonna put
- 11:08Speaker 1: me in a box, but we, so we have that, um, Now,
- 11:14Speaker 1: that being said, he's invaded a country and it's it's
- 11:19Speaker 1: terrible to watch right now. A lot of Americans don't
- 11:22Speaker 1: seem to feel any which way about the people that
- 11:27Speaker 1: are being killed. In fact, some of them think it's
- 11:31Speaker 1: a good thing. or that Putin is doing something to
- 11:35Speaker 1: be cheered on, like you would cheer on the Dallas Cowboys.
- 11:39Speaker 1: And they are saying that Vladimir Putin isn't your enemy,
- 11:43Speaker 1: which is okay, sure, but who is my enemy? I mean,
- 11:47Speaker 1: why does there need to be an enemy all the time?
- 11:51Speaker 1: Because inherent in Vladimir Putin isn't your enemy, it's Kamala
- 11:56Speaker 1: Harris is your enemy. You go, well, okay... Can I
- 12:01Speaker 1: live in a world where I'm not in direct conflict
- 12:03Speaker 1: with either Vladimir Putin or Kamala Harris? Because I'm trying to...
- 12:08Speaker 1: Kamala has more effect on my life. She could raise
- 12:11Speaker 1: my taxes. She could do things that I don't like.
- 12:15Speaker 1: That being said, I'd rather live here in America than
- 12:19Speaker 1: live in Moscow, which people have forgotten. I think somehow, somewhere...
- 12:25Speaker 1: People have forgotten that. They go, well, no, America's got
- 12:30Speaker 1: a lot of problems, too. Yeah, pound for pound, though,
- 12:34Speaker 1: it would be hard to really make the argument that
- 12:38Speaker 1: you'd be better off living in Russia. I mean, I
- 12:43Speaker 1: know you may be upset about what's happening in the country.
- 12:46Speaker 1: You don't like certain things. Critical race theories, you know,
- 12:51Speaker 1: got you bent out of shape. You know, whatever drag queens,
- 12:55Speaker 1: you know, read The Cat in the Hat in the library.
- 12:58Speaker 1: That's keeping you up. You know what I mean? You know,
- 13:04Speaker 1: there's not enough diversity in the Marvel movie franchise. On
- 13:08Speaker 1: the other side, whatever your problems happen to be, it's
- 13:11Speaker 1: probably pound for pound still better to live here. Not
- 13:17Speaker 1: maybe by that much and maybe not for much longer,
- 13:21Speaker 1: depending on how we go. But when you hear people
- 13:25Speaker 1: talk about this idea, there seems to be this idea that,
- 13:30Speaker 1: you know, where it's the debate is kind of about,
- 13:37Speaker 1: you know, like that we that the CIA and America
- 13:45Speaker 1: has done bad things, which we are well aware of.
- 13:48Speaker 1: We've had all of this on the show. We've been
- 13:52Speaker 1: completely aware that we are an empire in the stage
- 13:55Speaker 1: of decline, that the empire was established by CIA coups,
- 14:01Speaker 1: military conquest, as all empires are. I mean, we're very
- 14:05Speaker 1: aware of this, right? There's been no empire in history
- 14:08Speaker 1: that's ever gotten to the size we are or any
- 14:12Speaker 1: approximation of it without doing all those things. It's just
- 14:16Speaker 1: not the way empires are built. That doesn't excuse them.
- 14:20Speaker 1: That doesn't make them right. But there is a weird
- 14:24Speaker 1: idea or a strange idea that everything Russia does, which
- 14:32Speaker 1: is a bad thing, has to be immediately countered by
- 14:38Speaker 1: reminding people that we've also done a bad thing. It's
- 14:41Speaker 1: like an interesting kind of a knee-jerk, whereas if Putin
- 14:46Speaker 1: were to go in and nuke Ukraine tomorrow... people would tweet, well,
- 14:52Speaker 1: we also dropped the atom bomb on Japan. I don't
- 14:56Speaker 1: know what that does. I don't know what that accomplishes.
- 15:02Speaker 1: I don't know what, where that, I don't know. But
- 15:06Speaker 1: it's people are very, it's kind of people, if nukes
- 15:11Speaker 1: came flying over here, there'd be a fair amount of
- 15:14Speaker 1: the population that went, and he's right. Good for him. Like,
- 15:19Speaker 1: I mean, would they stop at that? That's a fair point.
- 15:22Speaker 1: If Putin were to invade America, which he's not going
- 15:26Speaker 1: to do, but if he were to do that, would
- 15:28Speaker 1: there be a segment of the population that goes, good,
- 15:34Speaker 1: good for him? I don't know. I'm not saying this.
- 15:41Speaker 1: It just does feel like it's a little bit of
- 15:43Speaker 1: a knee-jerk reaction to Where a lot of the stuff
- 15:46Speaker 1: coming out of the Ukraine is propaganda. For sure. We
- 15:51Speaker 1: know that. Is it dangerous propaganda? Perhaps if it needlessly
- 16:00Speaker 1: escalates the war where these neocon war hawks are like,
- 16:04Speaker 1: let's just enforce no-fly zones, which is essentially an act
- 16:08Speaker 1: of war. Yeah, I'm all for not being taken in
- 16:12Speaker 1: by war propaganda. But I don't personally need to fact
- 16:20Speaker 1: check every single inspirational story that comes out of the Ukraine.
- 16:30Speaker 1: I don't personally... When that goes to Kiev thing happened,
- 16:35Speaker 1: I don't care. If the ghost of Kiev is real
- 16:38Speaker 1: or not, whatever they need to believe, right? They're getting bombed.
- 16:42Speaker 1: Whatever they need to believe. You want to believe in
- 16:44Speaker 1: the ghost of Kiev, the ghost of Christmas past, none
- 16:47Speaker 1: of it means anything to me. People in this country
- 16:50Speaker 1: believe in all kinds of shit. They believe in monsters, cannibals.
- 16:56Speaker 1: People believe in Jesus. People believe in all kinds of stuff.
- 17:03Speaker 1: I don't care if they believe it or not. It's great.
- 17:06Speaker 1: Good for you. But if you want to believe in
- 17:08Speaker 1: the ghost of Kiev, I don't care. It doesn't really
- 17:11Speaker 1: affect me. Now, if you start to see the propaganda
- 17:15Speaker 1: go in a direction where you can kind of see
- 17:17Speaker 1: it moving, where it's like, well, I think we should
- 17:19Speaker 1: do more. Then you go, hold on. Calm down. Relax.
- 17:28Speaker 1: I am not for doing more. I am for Doing
- 17:32Speaker 1: the same... Or less... Because... We're not... We shouldn't be
- 17:38Speaker 1: getting into a war with Russia over there... It's not
- 17:39Speaker 1: our fight... I just don't... I don't see the value...
- 17:44Speaker 1: In like... Fact checking... Every... Little thing... That comes out
- 17:51Speaker 1: of the Ukraine... Where they're like... Putin... They got into
- 17:54Speaker 1: some firefight... At a nuclear plant... And everybody's like... It's fine...
- 17:58Speaker 1: The nuclear plant is fine... Everyone's freaking out over it,
- 18:03Speaker 1: but it's actually good. And you go, oh, okay. But
- 18:08Speaker 1: what is this? How far will this go? You know?
- 18:14Speaker 1: The orphanage Putin bombed was actually a secondary school. The
- 18:19Speaker 1: kids were four to seven. Okay. Well, it's different because
- 18:24Speaker 1: it's not an orphanage. You said it was babies.
- 18:28Speaker 2: They're eight.
- 18:31Speaker 1: Okay, I understand that. Well, I'm just saying, get your
- 18:35Speaker 1: facts straight. Oh, yeah, well, all right. But again, I
- 18:41Speaker 1: understand if that propaganda is being used to justify more
- 18:48Speaker 1: of a direct conflict with Russia, then yeah, fuck it, no.
- 18:53Speaker 1: That should be off the table. That's off the table.
- 18:58Speaker 1: We're not doing that. It's off the table. So I understand, like,
- 19:02Speaker 1: I understand, like, figuring out what's what. I just don't
- 19:05Speaker 1: see the need for myself to, like, you know, Zelensky,
- 19:13Speaker 1: there were three assassination attempts. Yeah, maybe not. Okay, but
- 19:19Speaker 1: in your own head, why wouldn't the Russians be trying
- 19:22Speaker 1: to assassinate him, right? Just think about it. Like, why
- 19:25Speaker 1: wouldn't they? If you were put, would you not want
- 19:29Speaker 1: him dead? I don't, you know. He's doing a pretty
- 19:34Speaker 1: good job of galvanizing support behind the cause. So wouldn't
- 19:39Speaker 1: you want him out of the picture? Well, they said three.
- 19:42Speaker 1: It was two. Get your facts straight. You go, I
- 19:47Speaker 1: understand the imposter. to to to distrust media narratives I
- 19:54Speaker 1: think it's important to have and I've done it my
- 19:59Speaker 1: entire life with 9-11 with all these things but in
- 20:03Speaker 1: this case it just feels again like everything is a
- 20:06Speaker 1: domestic politics Like, the big problem with the conspiracy movement
- 20:10Speaker 1: was it got fused with domestic politics. It used to
- 20:14Speaker 1: be people that were really well-read, who knew a lot
- 20:17Speaker 1: about history, questioning conclusions, and doing it in a very, like,
- 20:22Speaker 1: you know, pretty bookish way. They were pretty meticulous. And
- 20:30Speaker 1: they read a lot. And then the conspiracy movement through
- 20:35Speaker 1: QAnon became fused with domestic politics. The horse race, you know,
- 20:42Speaker 1: I'm going to win. I'm going to beat you. And
- 20:45Speaker 1: then a lot of people started to get interested in
- 20:48Speaker 1: these topics who had never read a book. and didn't
- 20:51Speaker 1: know anything, and were completely unaware of what disinformation was,
- 20:57Speaker 1: and were completely unaware of, yes, there is human trafficking
- 21:01Speaker 1: going around, but maybe the human traffickers are the ones
- 21:05Speaker 1: pushing these stories that they're cannibals, and they're boiling kids
- 21:09Speaker 1: in pots, and maybe they're doing that because it actually
- 21:13Speaker 1: seems so fantastical that it makes people dismiss the actual
- 21:18Speaker 1: reality of human trafficking as it relates to political elites
- 21:25Speaker 1: in America. So when you're talking about Chrissy Teigen running
- 21:29Speaker 1: a cult of witches eating children, people easily dismiss that.
- 21:34Speaker 1: But when you talk about Epstein and you talk about
- 21:36Speaker 1: things like that, and there's facts, now it's much harder
- 21:41Speaker 1: to dismiss. So a lot of that weird, and I'm
- 21:44Speaker 1: not saying that the weird people in this country don't
- 21:46Speaker 1: do occult shit and don't murder kids or whatever, But
- 21:48Speaker 1: I'm saying, as this grand conspiracy that QAnon became, it
- 21:54Speaker 1: actually did more to hurt legitimate concerns and questions about
- 22:01Speaker 1: human trafficking because it was all about winning. It was
- 22:04Speaker 1: all about the domestic political impulse of seeing your enemies
- 22:08Speaker 1: get smashed, seeing them lose. And this was, of course,
- 22:12Speaker 1: seeing them get locked up, put in Guantanamo Bay, executed. So...
- 22:19Speaker 1: Looking at this war and making it about Joe Biden
- 22:22Speaker 1: or Donald Trump or making it about how to win
- 22:27Speaker 1: against somebody else that disagrees with you about something seems
- 22:35Speaker 1: to be... It just seems to be very limiting. It's
- 22:39Speaker 1: limiting in the scope of human experience, the way to
- 22:43Speaker 1: look at things, the way to analyze things. You shouldn't necessarily...
- 22:47Speaker 1: hear something, and then immediately leap to, okay, but how
- 22:51Speaker 1: does this serve my overall goal of making my neighbor
- 22:56Speaker 1: look stupid? You should look at it and try to
- 23:01Speaker 1: form opinions outside of that, outside of that impulse. I
- 23:06Speaker 1: try to check that impulse all the time. It kills humor,
- 23:09Speaker 1: it kills creativity, it kills being good at your job.
- 23:12Speaker 1: I mean, unless you just want to be a hack,
- 23:15Speaker 1: partisan person is shoving slop down people's throat, which is
- 23:20Speaker 1: how many people earn great livings. But if you don't
- 23:23Speaker 1: want to do that, you shouldn't. That's why everybody's like, oh,
- 23:27Speaker 1: you're a centrist, so you're never ticked up. Whatever you
- 23:32Speaker 1: want to call it, I don't care what you people think. Truly,
- 23:38Speaker 1: I have enough money. I could quit tomorrow. Ben would
- 23:40Speaker 1: have to work, but I don't. And he's young, and
- 23:43Speaker 1: he can get a job. I don't care what any
- 23:45Speaker 1: of you think. If I did, I never would have
- 23:47Speaker 1: done this show because everybody told me it was a
- 23:50Speaker 1: waste of my time and that I should just, you know,
- 23:52Speaker 1: do a food show on Comedy Central and, Be the
- 23:55Speaker 1: next Anthony Bourdain and go to places and talk to
- 23:59Speaker 1: the diner waitress and do that or do a travelogue,
- 24:04Speaker 1: do a travel show. Go around and talk to people.
- 24:09Speaker 1: Go to the fair. But no, we did this show,
- 24:12Speaker 1: so I don't give a fuck what you people think.
- 24:14Speaker 1: It doesn't matter. I barely care what I think. And
- 24:19Speaker 1: I make a lot of money thinking. You know we
- 24:23Speaker 1: have a lot of fun about Bitcoin here. I'm a comedian.
- 24:25Speaker 1: It's kind of my job to talk shit, not give
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- 25:05Speaker 1: on one painting? It could be because art pieces outpace
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- 25:29Speaker 1: It's a good idea to invest in art, truly. And
- 25:34Speaker 1: a lot of people do not have the capital, obviously,
- 25:36Speaker 1: to buy a painting outright. So what Masterworks is allowing people...
- 25:40Speaker 1: Are you paying attention to me? What they're allowing people
- 25:43Speaker 1: to do is invest in the art. It's really amazing.
- 25:49Speaker 1: My friends at Masterworks are really making this happen for you. Masterworks.art
- 25:55Speaker 1: slash Tim. See the important disclaimers at masterworks.io slash disclaimer.
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- 27:01Speaker 3: idea behind the company Lucy.
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- 29:35Speaker 1: For a limited time, subject to change, terms apply. But
- 29:40Speaker 1: I try to look at both sides of an issue
- 29:44Speaker 1: and go, where are people correct in my estimation and
- 29:52Speaker 1: where are they wrong? So I get checking propaganda, and
- 29:57Speaker 1: I get that propaganda being dangerous if it's used to
- 30:00Speaker 1: force more of a direct conflict with Russia, right? But then,
- 30:05Speaker 1: of course, I see that that can go overboard, too.
- 30:08Speaker 1: That can get a little silly. You know, that just
- 30:11Speaker 1: seems it can get a little silly, right? Like, for example,
- 30:16Speaker 1: if Putin just launches nuclear strikes at four or five
- 30:18Speaker 1: different countries, now he's not going to do this. But
- 30:20Speaker 1: let's say he did, you know, would people, well, it's
- 30:23Speaker 1: the expansion of NATO. Yeah, maybe, but hey, we're in
- 30:27Speaker 1: a different place now. Let's try to think about how
- 30:30Speaker 1: to survive here. You know, you don't have any survival instinct. Well,
- 30:36Speaker 1: you know, we shouldn't have done. Yeah, well, hey, you know.
- 30:40Speaker 1: It's like you're in a bad situation. You know, some
- 30:44Speaker 1: guy's got a gun to the back of your head.
- 30:46Speaker 1: You're in a bad part of the city and one
- 30:48Speaker 1: of your friends looks and goes, we never should have
- 30:50Speaker 1: came here. It's like, hey, this is not helping. This
- 30:53Speaker 1: doesn't really help at the present moment. I don't know
- 30:55Speaker 1: how bad things are going to get. You know? You know,
- 31:00Speaker 1: I mean, I'm hoping that this, I mean, I'm bored
- 31:03Speaker 1: of it already, if that's a good sign. I hope
- 31:06Speaker 1: it's a good sign. It's become boring to me. I
- 31:10Speaker 1: don't really want to keep watching this. It was fun
- 31:13Speaker 1: for a few days because it was new and interesting,
- 31:16Speaker 1: but it's really become, to be honest, dull. And people's
- 31:22Speaker 1: takes are already becoming circular. You've heard them. They keep...
- 31:30Speaker 1: I'm getting wary of the sing-songy bullshit on one side
- 31:34Speaker 1: about how... zielinski and all this stuff like i'm getting
- 31:37Speaker 1: wary of that because that's my nature to be like
- 31:39Speaker 1: wait a minute hold on where are we going and
- 31:41Speaker 1: then on the other side where people are just literally
- 31:43Speaker 1: putting putin's cock in their mouth and sucking them off
- 31:46Speaker 1: on tv is also slightly so i don't know where
- 31:50Speaker 1: i just turn it off gotta turn it off you
- 31:54Speaker 1: know all these dumb things that we do you know
- 31:56Speaker 1: the you know i was in long island the other
- 31:58Speaker 1: day and There was a sign, you know, the town
- 32:01Speaker 1: of Babylon stands with Ukraine. It's like that type of shit.
- 32:05Speaker 1: Of course, it's like cringe. You look at that stuff,
- 32:08Speaker 1: you go, what the fuck is this going to do?
- 32:09Speaker 1: But what else are we going to do? What the
- 32:12Speaker 1: fuck else are you going to do? You just go, yeah, well,
- 32:15Speaker 1: town of Babylon stands with Ukraine. And by the way,
- 32:18Speaker 1: I've been to Babylon. They probably don't. That's the other thing.
- 32:23Speaker 1: I don't know if they took a poll. I don't
- 32:26Speaker 1: know who the fuck put up that sign. But it's just,
- 32:31Speaker 1: you know, I'm getting tired of it. I'm getting tired
- 32:36Speaker 1: of it. We're supposed to be out of this. We're
- 32:39Speaker 1: supposed to be getting out of a pandemic. And then
- 32:42Speaker 1: there's supposed to be some type of creative renaissance. This
- 32:45Speaker 1: is what I've been. And I don't mean in a
- 32:48Speaker 1: good way. I mean like a very dumb, silly, stupid,
- 32:53Speaker 1: you know, spate of film projects that come out where...
- 33:00Speaker 1: People are really goofy. Nothing has a plot. And everybody
- 33:06Speaker 1: is just so happy to be out of their house.
- 33:08Speaker 1: They just don't care anymore. And that's what I was picturing.
- 33:15Speaker 1: Not a war. We're in war mode. And I'm just like,
- 33:21Speaker 1: I can't get into it. I just can't get into it.
- 33:25Speaker 1: I can't get into it. Does that sound cunty? Perhaps.
- 33:30Speaker 1: But what do you want me to do? Force it?
- 33:33Speaker 1: I can't force it like HBO is forcing the storyline.
- 33:37Speaker 1: I can't force myself into it. You know, we did it.
- 33:39Speaker 1: We had the guy on the show. And we listened
- 33:42Speaker 1: to David Bowie's Heroes in the car. And we drove
- 33:45Speaker 1: over the 59th Street Bridge and then we went to
- 33:47Speaker 1: have bagels. We did it. We did what we were
- 33:51Speaker 1: there to do. He came on. He told his tale.
- 33:56Speaker 1: And we supported him. I donated $ 5, 000 of Bitcoin to him.
- 34:02Speaker 1: And he sent me a few photos of like charred
- 34:05Speaker 1: Russian bodies, I guess, which I wanted photos of something else,
- 34:08Speaker 1: which I don't think he got. I think it was
- 34:10Speaker 1: a language barrier for $ 5, 000. I wanted other, but whatever.
- 34:14Speaker 1: Doesn't matter. We wish him well. We wish him the best. But,
- 34:18Speaker 1: you know, we did a heroic thing for Ukraine by
- 34:21Speaker 1: having him on a show. you know, that's ad supported
- 34:25Speaker 1: and we made a lot of money to do. But
- 34:29Speaker 1: I'm kind of now, I've reached the point now where
- 34:31Speaker 1: I go, okay, I just, I want to, you know,
- 34:34Speaker 1: we're heading into the spring and the summer and I just,
- 34:36Speaker 1: you know, we don't need gas being a million trillion dollars.
- 34:41Speaker 1: We just don't need it. We don't need it. Enough
- 34:44Speaker 1: with the sanctions. Let's calm down with the sanctions because
- 34:51Speaker 1: here's the deal. It's about to impact all of us
- 34:55Speaker 1: in ways we don't like. Airfare going up. Price of
- 35:00Speaker 1: gas going up. We're trying to have a summer here.
- 35:05Speaker 1: I'm talking like this. Everyone's afraid to say these things.
- 35:09Speaker 1: I'm going to say them. And by the way, I
- 35:11Speaker 1: don't mean that because there's a lot of people saying them.
- 35:15Speaker 1: By the way, it should be taboo. Like, what I'm
- 35:17Speaker 1: saying should be taboo, but I believe it's being pretty
- 35:21Speaker 1: openly discussed in Congress. But I do believe we got
- 35:26Speaker 1: to look out for ourselves a little bit here, and
- 35:29Speaker 1: I just think we can't really go too crazy with
- 35:32Speaker 1: the sanctions. What if we did it? What if we
- 35:36Speaker 1: lifted the sanctions on Putin and said, hey, what if...
- 35:43Speaker 1: What is it? You catch more flies with honey than
- 35:45Speaker 1: you do with vinegar? What if we lifted the sanctions?
- 35:51Speaker 1: I mean, as a show of good faith... I'm not
- 35:55Speaker 1: a geopolitical mastermind, but what if it was a show
- 35:57Speaker 1: of good faith? Lift the sanctions. And go, hey, do
- 36:02Speaker 1: what you gotta do. But just, you know, take care
- 36:08Speaker 1: of us here. We need... Get the price of fuel down.
- 36:16Speaker 1: It's a fact. From New York City, how many miles
- 36:24Speaker 1: is it from New York City to the Hamptons? How
- 36:29Speaker 1: many miles?
- 36:31Speaker 2: It is, let's see here.
- 36:34Speaker 1: Sorry.
- 36:35Speaker 2: It is exactly 94 miles.
- 36:37Speaker 1: Okay. Okay. It's 100 miles. Let's round it. Okay. It
- 36:42Speaker 1: is 100 miles of gas. How many miles to the
- 36:46Speaker 1: gallon are people getting?
- 36:48Speaker 3: On average, on that highway, probably like 18.
- 36:54Speaker 1: 18 miles to the gallon. So how many gallons of gas?
- 36:57Speaker 1: About five or six?
- 36:57Speaker 2: We're looking at about five or six gallons.
- 36:59Speaker 1: And gas is what now?
- 37:02Speaker 2: About four. I mean, it's about four. Four or five dollars. Yeah,
- 37:05Speaker 2: people are bracing for five. That's what's coming.
- 37:07Speaker 1: So every time... We go to the Hamptons, about $ 30.
- 37:09Speaker 2: Yeah, five gallons there, five gallons back. You're looking at.
- 37:14Speaker 1: $ 60.
- 37:14Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 37:15Speaker 1: That's $ 60 for one trip to the Hamptons. $ 60. Now,
- 37:21Speaker 1: that's for the people that drive. Then we have helicopters.
- 37:25Speaker 1: We have private planes. No, I mean, this is.
- 37:28Speaker 2: No, you're right, you're right.
- 37:29Speaker 1: Hey, here's the reality here. No, this is... I'm not...
- 37:33Speaker 1: I'm not here to pretend... That things aren't how they are.
- 37:40Speaker 1: This is a big problem heading into the summer. People
- 37:45Speaker 1: are going to want to go to Europe. They're going
- 37:47Speaker 1: to want to travel. I have a lot of friends
- 37:50Speaker 1: that are going to be in Martha's Vineyard. Maybe they're
- 37:53Speaker 1: going to be in Nantucket. Ferries. You know what I mean? Like, guys,
- 37:57Speaker 1: what are we?
- 37:58Speaker 2: What?
- 37:59Speaker 1: Like, are you willing to trade your summer for Ukraine? No, no, no, no, no.
- 38:06Speaker 1: I'm dead serious. Are you willing to trade your summer
- 38:10Speaker 1: for the Ukraine? I'm talking about the summer of love,
- 38:14Speaker 1: the summer of fucking. COVID is finally over. Fax mandates
- 38:19Speaker 1: have dropped. I'm talking partying outside. I mean, eating a
- 38:25Speaker 1: pussy that tastes like peach melba. The summer. I'm talking
- 38:29Speaker 1: about warm summer breezes. I mean, are you willing to not...
- 38:37Speaker 1: participate in a lot of those activities because of the
- 38:42Speaker 1: Ukraine and I don't know I don't think I am
- 38:48Speaker 1: so I believe right now we need to lift all
- 38:52Speaker 1: the sanctions on Putin until the fall because and he'll
- 39:01Speaker 1: still be there we can sanction him in the fall
- 39:05Speaker 1: I just let's be honest You know? Where were you
- 39:11Speaker 1: going to go this summer? Carviv? Is that where you
- 39:14Speaker 1: were going to go? Were you going to go to Carviv?
- 39:19Speaker 1: Were you? Or were you going to go to Malibu?
- 39:23Speaker 1: Let's start looking out for number one. We didn't get
- 39:29Speaker 1: to be the greatest country in the world by taking
- 39:32Speaker 1: care of other people let's be honest and maybe you
- 39:38Speaker 1: might not believe we're the greatest country in the world
- 39:41Speaker 1: and that's absolutely fine but we didn't get here by
- 39:46Speaker 1: concern for others as Twitter will tell you So it's
- 39:51Speaker 1: time to stop pretending that we got to cut it
- 39:54Speaker 1: out now. Cut it out. Stop the flags. Stop the songs.
- 40:00Speaker 1: Stop the song and dance routine. Cut it out. We've
- 40:04Speaker 1: done it now for a week. Our movies suck. Nobody
- 40:11Speaker 1: respects us anymore. We don't even put out good shit.
- 40:14Speaker 1: Everything we make is horrible. Every comedian special that comes
- 40:18Speaker 1: out on HBO, not all of them, but a lot
- 40:20Speaker 1: of them, it's just somebody on a stage talking about
- 40:23Speaker 1: how sad they are without a goddamn joke. The rest
- 40:28Speaker 1: of the world has figured us out. Okay? We fucked up.
- 40:33Speaker 1: We haven't put out a good movie in a long
- 40:35Speaker 1: fucking time. There's not shit to watch. We used to
- 40:39Speaker 1: bomb the hell out of these people, rape and pillage,
- 40:42Speaker 1: but we used to give them good shit. Great movies, okay?
- 40:47Speaker 1: Ghostbusters and Seinfeld and Scent of a Woman, whatever. They
- 40:50Speaker 1: loved it. You know, rap music, black culture, all these
- 40:54Speaker 1: things we exported all over the world. Everything we do
- 40:58Speaker 1: now sucks. We don't have any soft power that's worth
- 41:02Speaker 1: a damn. So just shut it down. Lift the sanctions
- 41:07Speaker 1: on Putin. Lift them on Putin. Let's have a summer.
- 41:10Speaker 1: It's time to have a summer. Whether you're a poor
- 41:13Speaker 1: piece of shit trash bag who gets drunk at a
- 41:16Speaker 1: lake or you got a little scratch and you find
- 41:19Speaker 1: your way to one of the fucking oceans in this
- 41:21Speaker 1: country somewhere. Whatever. Not my business. Everybody deserves a fucking
- 41:27Speaker 1: summer after the two years we've had. And that involves
- 41:30Speaker 1: immediately lifting the sanctions on Vladimir Putin. I'm sorry. I apologize.
- 41:36Speaker 1: But there's no other way out here. Lift the fucking sanctions.
- 41:43Speaker 1: I'm talking gas 289. Not even. Let's start cutting deals.
- 41:51Speaker 1: Here's the deal. We're going to feel bad if we
- 41:54Speaker 1: lift the sanctions. We're going to feel horrible because he's
- 41:58Speaker 1: going to use all that money to go in there.
- 42:01Speaker 1: And I mean, God, what he's going to do. But
- 42:04Speaker 1: that's why the gas has to be so cheap. The
- 42:08Speaker 1: deal has to be so good. I mean, I'm talking
- 42:11Speaker 1: about what can we get it down to?
- 42:14Speaker 2: 210.
- 42:14Speaker 1: It's got to be so good. That you're eating that
- 42:19Speaker 1: burger and the summer breeze is hitting you in the
- 42:21Speaker 1: face and everybody's got their tits and dicks out and
- 42:23Speaker 1: everybody's having fun and you just, you don't, you feel
- 42:28Speaker 1: a little bad but not that bad because the deal's
- 42:32Speaker 1: gotta be good for us to turn away from this.
- 42:36Speaker 1: To look away. And remove all sanctions, we gotta get
- 42:41Speaker 1: a good deal on fuel. Good deal. So that we
- 42:46Speaker 1: can go have a summer. The world is going to
- 42:49Speaker 1: be uninhabitable in, I don't know, seven years? Enjoy what
- 42:55Speaker 1: you have. Enjoy what you have now. So this is my,
- 43:02Speaker 1: and again, it is not, it is not the most,
- 43:06Speaker 1: you know, you know, it's not a position that makes
- 43:12Speaker 1: me proud that I have it. I'm not proud of it.
- 43:18Speaker 1: But do you see another way out?
- 43:20Speaker 2: Do you see another way out of this?
- 43:23Speaker 1: Do you see a way out?
- 43:24Speaker 2: Here's why I like it. Here's why I like it. Yeah,
- 43:26Speaker 2: I like it. Here's why I like it.
- 43:28Speaker 3: Because if they're going to occupy for 10 or 15 years,
- 43:32Speaker 3: we come back in the fall and we sanction them
- 43:34Speaker 3: fall and winter.
- 43:35Speaker 1: Or not, because we got to do shit then too.
- 43:38Speaker 1: The fall is amazing. People want to do a weekend
- 43:42Speaker 1: in the Berkshires. Listen, can we cut it out with this?
- 43:47Speaker 1: Stop with this. Have a summer. I mean, this is
- 43:55Speaker 1: what we got to do. This is what we got
- 43:58Speaker 1: to do. There's no other way around this here. And
- 44:01Speaker 1: this is unfortunate. When is this? Do we have to
- 44:06Speaker 1: just put this out as the main one? Because if
- 44:08Speaker 1: we put it out as a Patreon, when's that supposed
- 44:10Speaker 1: to go out?
- 44:12Speaker 3: That would be in six days from now So if
- 44:14Speaker 3: there's like nuclear things.
- 44:16Speaker 1: So we have to put this out as the main
- 44:17Speaker 1: one Yeah, probably I just do audio only Yeah, what
- 44:20Speaker 1: are you gonna do? Hey, fuck you If you don't
- 44:22Speaker 1: like it Who cares? But I am saying right now
- 44:28Speaker 1: we should absolutely, without a doubt, remove all sanctions on
- 44:32Speaker 1: Vladimir Putin and commend him on securing the Ukraine from Nazis. Now,
- 44:38Speaker 1: there are some Nazis over there that Azov, that's their
- 44:42Speaker 1: elite fighting force. They're all not. Can we call the great,
- 44:45Speaker 1: I want to call the great Melanie here. Let's see
- 44:47Speaker 1: if she answers because... There's no one funnier than her,
- 44:51Speaker 1: quite frankly. And she did sum this up kind of
- 44:54Speaker 1: brilliantly the other day. And by the way, some people
- 44:56Speaker 1: listen from Ukraine, and I'm very sorry about this, but
- 45:00Speaker 1: we just deserve a summer. Hello? Hey, Melanie, how are you? Hey,
- 45:13Speaker 1: what's up, man? Listen, you're on the podcast. Let me
- 45:17Speaker 1: ask you, you know more about everything. Putin, we all
- 45:21Speaker 1: know Putin's a psychopath, but aren't the Ukrainians also like
- 45:24Speaker 1: kind of Nazis? Yeah, they're like white supremacists, and all
- 45:28Speaker 1: of a sudden everybody loves them. They are kind of Nazis, though. Yeah,
- 45:32Speaker 1: they're part Nazis. One of the guys that, like, what's
- 45:35Speaker 1: his face? Byron's hand, like, shaking hands with is like,
- 45:38Speaker 1: you know, a total Nazi. And people forget it, too.
- 45:43Speaker 1: It's like, oh, well, you know. They're... They're Nazis, but
- 45:49Speaker 1: they're not as bad as the Russians. Right, right. You know,
- 45:52Speaker 1: it's convenient. Right, for sure.
- 45:55Speaker 2: I don't know why this is all even happening. But
- 45:57Speaker 2: it's not going to end well, I can tell you that.
- 45:58Speaker 1: I mean, you know what? Putin's not going to lose.
- 46:01Speaker 1: He's just going to push the button at the end. Right,
- 46:03Speaker 1: he's not going to lose. But I'm just saying, listen,
- 46:05Speaker 1: I want to keep gas cheap because I think we
- 46:08Speaker 1: all deserve a nice summer. Oh, God, dude, let me
- 46:11Speaker 1: tell you something. Yeah, exactly. The gas situation, what you recall,
- 46:16Speaker 1: Putin has, I think it's about, I.
- 46:19Speaker 3: Would say between at least almost 30% of the market
- 46:23Speaker 3: coming in, and he's exporting almost all the natural.
- 46:26Speaker 1: Gas to Germany. That's why you're seeing such a tepid
- 46:28Speaker 1: response on Ukraine from all these countries.
- 46:31Speaker 2: They're like, yeah, we want to help, but we want
- 46:33Speaker 2: to eat food.
- 46:35Speaker 3: We don't want to pay a zillion dollars for heat
- 46:38Speaker 3: and all this other stuff, especially here.
- 46:40Speaker 1: You know what I mean? Yeah. I don't know what
- 46:44Speaker 1: we have to do here, but I'm not into going
- 46:48Speaker 1: into a nuclear war for the Ukraine. No, me neither.
- 46:51Speaker 2: No, no. Or as Biden would say, the Uranian, which
- 46:55Speaker 2: I thought was hysterical.
- 46:56Speaker 1: Yeah. Well, he's a corpse. No. No nuclear war. What
- 47:00Speaker 1: should we call it? He.
- 47:02Speaker 1: God, I mean, if the gas, like right now everybody's like,
- 47:04Speaker 1: the poor Ukraine, but if it goes up to like,
- 47:07Speaker 1: you know, $ 8 or $ 9 a gallon, they're going to
- 47:09Speaker 1: go to war with them. You know what I mean?
- 47:12Speaker 1: You know what, that's probably what will happen is the
- 47:14Speaker 1: gas will go up to about $ 7 a.
- 47:15Speaker 3: Gallon and like $ 10 in California, and we'll sneak a
- 47:19Speaker 3: bomb in there to just end it and blame it
- 47:21Speaker 3: on the Russians.
- 47:23Speaker 1: It may be the best thing to do. Of course.
- 47:27Speaker 1: I mean, we just have to do it. All right,
- 47:29Speaker 1: I'll call you later, babe. Thank you so much. We
- 47:31Speaker 1: appreciate it. It's a great Melanie. Again, it's rare that
- 47:35Speaker 1: someone has moral clarity in these times, and she does.
- 47:39Speaker 1: That's what I like about it. It's moral clarity, and
- 47:41Speaker 1: we don't see a lot of it. We don't see
- 47:45Speaker 1: a lot of it in these times, but I do
- 47:47Speaker 1: think it's important that we keep our eye on the
- 47:51Speaker 1: prize here, which is the price of fuel and our
- 47:56Speaker 1: ability to have a good summer. And I know the world, well,
- 48:00Speaker 1: the world order is being rocked. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- 48:05Speaker 1: But you know what? How about a fun summer that
- 48:10Speaker 1: we've earned, that we didn't have last summer because of
- 48:13Speaker 1: fucking Delta. Now we're just, it's going to be great.
- 48:16Speaker 1: COVID is done. It's in the rear view. And I
- 48:20Speaker 1: think we're just going to, so I think that's the real,
- 48:23Speaker 1: that's the challenge. How much of your lifestyle are you
- 48:27Speaker 1: willing to sacrifice? I am willing to do what I've done. Tweet, post.
- 48:37Speaker 1: I'll sign a sternly worded letter written by Barry Weiss.
- 48:41Speaker 1: But I mean, you know what I mean? Hair is
- 48:45Speaker 1: so important. Keeping your hair is very important, but you
- 48:48Speaker 1: got to keep your hair. That's the best way to
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- 49:27Speaker 1: and they give you the generic versions of them. So
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- 49:56Speaker 1: My friend is doing this right now, and I mean,
- 49:58Speaker 1: he is keeping his hair. He's basically stopped hair loss
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- 50:19Speaker 1: Keep your hair. You know who wears bird dogs? President Zelinsky.
- 50:24Speaker 1: Now I know you're all out there and you want
- 50:26Speaker 1: to suck his fat uncut hog. His fat uncut hose.
- 50:30Speaker 1: You don't even care if he washes it first. Suck
- 50:33Speaker 1: it right from the gym. Suck his fat, uncut cock.
- 50:37Speaker 1: Get in there. I bet he's got a big horse
- 50:41Speaker 1: cock and big furry balls, and you don't even care
- 50:44Speaker 1: if some of the hair is getting in your mouth
- 50:46Speaker 1: or go down your throat. You still keep chugging it,
- 50:49Speaker 1: jerking the base and sucking it, licking the balls, maybe
- 50:53Speaker 1: even lick his tank, maybe even eat his ass. It
- 50:55Speaker 1: doesn't even matter. You know why? Because he's got bird
- 50:59Speaker 1: dogs on, and he's doing heroic things in the Ukraine. Mm-hmm.
- 51:05Speaker 1: Bird dogs are great. They're pants. You don't have to
- 51:07Speaker 1: wear underwear. So if you want to suck off the
- 51:09Speaker 1: president of the Ukraine, pull his big cock out and
- 51:12Speaker 1: just go to town on it. I mean, swallow every
- 51:15Speaker 1: fucking drip of his cum. Take it down. So much
- 51:20Speaker 1: of it where in the beginning of it, it's hot,
- 51:23Speaker 1: but then there's so much of it, you look unsure.
- 51:27Speaker 1: You take that kind of load from him. You know why?
- 51:30Speaker 1: Because he's got bird dogs on. That's right. There's cum
- 51:34Speaker 1: all over his stomach. You got to suck it out
- 51:35Speaker 1: of his belly button. It's everywhere. Bird dogs. President Zelensky.
- 51:43Speaker 1: And then he fucks you. After that, because he's ready
- 51:47Speaker 1: to go again because he's a crazy man.
- 51:49Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 51:50Speaker 1: And then he just fucks you raw. He beats it
- 51:54Speaker 1: up to the point where you're grabbing things that don't exist.
- 51:58Speaker 1: You're scaling the walls. He's just destroying you. beating every
- 52:05Speaker 1: fucking hole, smacking you in the face with it. You're
- 52:10Speaker 1: screaming in pain and pleasure. Why? Because he has bird
- 52:15Speaker 1: dogs on.
- 52:16Speaker 2: That's the comfort of built-in underwear.
- 52:18Speaker 1: Fuck me, you hero. Fuck me, you hero. That's what
- 52:22Speaker 1: you'll yell as he hits it from the back, smashing you,
- 52:27Speaker 1: putting your face in the pillow, and maybe biting the
- 52:29Speaker 1: back of your neck. Don't stop. Never stop. Go on.
- 52:36Speaker 3: Well, I was just sort of explaining what bird dogs
- 52:39Speaker 3: are and why I like them so much.
- 52:40Speaker 1: Yeah.
- 52:41Speaker 3: It's the comfort of built-in underwear. Finish in my mouth.
- 52:47Speaker 3: He goes, you want me to come in your mouth again?
- 52:50Speaker 1: Yes. Never stop. President Zelinsky fucking you. Like an animal.
- 53:02Speaker 3: I like their designs. They have cool designs, like, with
- 53:07Speaker 3: the underwear on the inside.
- 53:08Speaker 1: Pants, shorts. Maybe he pisses on you in the shower afterwards.
- 53:11Speaker 1: You feel his warm piss and you go down and
- 53:14Speaker 1: you take it in your mouth like a golden shower
- 53:17Speaker 1: and say, hero. Maybe you give him a blumpkin as
- 53:22Speaker 1: he's taking a big shit. What are you trying to say?
- 53:26Speaker 2: Well, they have camo ones, too, the deer hunters.
- 53:29Speaker 1: Oh, good. Yeah, get them, folks. They're good.
- 53:32Speaker 2: Duffy the Vampire Slayers. That's a cool pair.
- 53:34Speaker 1: They're good. Everyone loves them.
- 53:37Speaker 2: My wife actually likes them on me. She thinks they're attractive.
- 53:39Speaker 1: Well, you know who she'd really like? President Zelinsky. She
- 53:43Speaker 1: would throw you out of bed real quick if she
- 53:45Speaker 1: could just hop on top of President Zelinsky and ride
- 53:48Speaker 1: his cock. You know it would be hot if your
- 53:51Speaker 1: wife fucked Zelinsky with a gun in her mouth. Do
- 53:55Speaker 1: you think that would be hot? If she rode Zelinsky's
- 53:58Speaker 1: cock with a gun in her mouth and played a
- 54:01Speaker 1: little Russian roulette, there's one bullet in because how hot
- 54:04Speaker 1: would it be? Sad because we both like her. But
- 54:07Speaker 1: if she blew her brains out and died as they
- 54:10Speaker 1: were both coming bird dogs, tell them the deal. What's
- 54:14Speaker 1: the deal here? Oh yes.
- 54:15Speaker 3: We have a call to action here. So if you
- 54:17Speaker 3: go to bird dogs.com and you enter the promo code, Tim.
- 54:21Speaker 1: Dillon, by the shorts, cause they let us say this.
- 54:23Speaker 2: Yeah. Uh, We'll see.
- 54:25Speaker 3: I think they will. They said anything goes, but that
- 54:28Speaker 3: was a... Well, what does anything goes mean? Well, that
- 54:31Speaker 3: was sort of a heroic dose of anything goes.
- 54:34Speaker 1: Well, we're talking about a hero, President Zelensky, and the
- 54:37Speaker 1: way he likes to fucking shred bus.
- 54:39Speaker 2: An asshole.
- 54:41Speaker 1: Sexuality means nothing to him. He just fucks anything. Wet
- 54:44Speaker 1: or dry.
- 54:46Speaker 3: So all you got to do is go to BirdDogs.com,
- 54:48Speaker 3: you enter the promo code Tim Dillon, and they'll throw
- 54:50Speaker 3: in a free Bird Dogs whistle football, which my dog likes, Gracie.
- 54:53Speaker 1: That's great. That dog's an anxiety-filled moron.
- 54:56Speaker 3: That's BirdDogs.com, promo code Tim Dillon, and boom, a free
- 55:00Speaker 3: Bird Dogs football with your pair of Bird Dogs. You
- 55:03Speaker 3: will not take these things off, I promise you.
- 55:06Speaker 1: Thank you. I wonder if I'm going to do the
- 55:08Speaker 1: Bitcoin convention. You know, we've been playing chicken with them
- 55:10Speaker 1: because I want more money and whatever. I don't know
- 55:14Speaker 1: if I'm going to go. I do have fun when
- 55:16Speaker 1: I go. I do like that community. I got to
- 55:17Speaker 1: find if I can get a big guest. I don't
- 55:20Speaker 1: know if I can get a big guest. I wanted
- 55:22Speaker 1: Caitlyn Jenner. That was my fucking goal. And I don't
- 55:25Speaker 1: know if I'm going to be able to get her.
- 55:27Speaker 1: I wanted Caitlyn Jenner for the Bitcoin conference. Logan Paul
- 55:31Speaker 1: and Caitlyn Jenner together was a goal of mine to have.
- 55:36Speaker 1: And then this kid Will Clemente on Twitter is very
- 55:38Speaker 1: smart about Bitcoin. But I just don't know if I'm
- 55:41Speaker 1: going to get any of the big names. Does it
- 55:43Speaker 1: make sense to go there without the big names? Right?
- 55:48Speaker 3: No, we got to have Caitlyn.
- 55:51Speaker 1: I wanted somebody big. Maybe we get Putin. If I
- 55:55Speaker 1: could get Putin, that would be great. If I could get,
- 55:58Speaker 1: you know, Zelensky or something. But I don't want to
- 56:01Speaker 1: sit there and I need some real fucking star power.
- 56:05Speaker 1: to make that conference worth it. Last year we had
- 56:08Speaker 1: the Winklevoss twins, who said a collection of nine words
- 56:11Speaker 1: throughout the hour, and Jake Paul, who talked about wanting
- 56:14Speaker 1: to kill Dana White. But I was at least funny,
- 56:17Speaker 1: and the show was good. I don't know what else,
- 56:21Speaker 1: I don't know what we're gonna do this year. I
- 56:23Speaker 1: don't wanna do stand-up, they're doing a comedy tent, I
- 56:26Speaker 1: don't wanna do that. So I don't know who I
- 56:29Speaker 1: can bring in. I just don't know. So, you know,
- 56:36Speaker 1: I'm still up in the air with this. They just
- 56:38Speaker 1: sold a house in L.A. called The One. And it's
- 56:42Speaker 1: a great story. Oh, they sold it. And I subscribed
- 56:44Speaker 1: to the L.A. Times. They sold it. And the thing
- 56:49Speaker 1: about this house is the builder is in a shitload
- 56:54Speaker 1: of debt. If you go to the L.A. Times article,
- 56:56Speaker 1: which you're not subscribed to, but I'll give you the
- 56:59Speaker 1: time to subscribe right now, for $ 1 for six months...
- 57:03Speaker 1: What publications are you subscribed to for the good of
- 57:06Speaker 1: the show?
- 57:07Speaker 2: Wall Street Journal I finally signed up for.
- 57:09Speaker 1: No, no, no. This is what you should be subscribed to.
- 57:12Speaker 1: And I'm not kidding. Okay. And you can submit this
- 57:15Speaker 1: and I'll pay for it like I do everything else.
- 57:17Speaker 1: Here's what you should literally be subscribed to. The New
- 57:20Speaker 1: York Times, the LA Times, the Wall Street Journal, probably
- 57:24Speaker 1: the Miami Herald, Chicago Tribune. Fuck it. Especially because of Lightfoot,
- 57:29Speaker 1: the Chicago Tribune. Mm-hmm. The Boston Globe You should subscribe
- 57:33Speaker 1: to like 10 or 20 papers, truly Even the Cleveland
- 57:37Speaker 1: Plain Dealer Because there's stories in there You know what
- 57:40Speaker 1: I mean? But again, I know it's your like How
- 57:44Speaker 1: do we do less, spend less Do it on the cheap.
- 57:48Speaker 3: Well, this is my one of six free articles For
- 57:50Speaker 3: the month for LA Times Well.
- 57:51Speaker 1: Is that the way to build a show?
- 57:53Speaker 2: Into an empire?
- 57:55Speaker 1: Trying to have six free articles? No That's right Thank you. Well,
- 58:02Speaker 1: this article is cool because the guy that built this
- 58:07Speaker 1: house took a $ 90 million subprime loan from a company
- 58:13Speaker 1: called Westlake Financial, which does hard money loans, which means
- 58:18Speaker 1: loans you can't get in the traditional banking system. So
- 58:22Speaker 1: the developer took this loan, and then he went wild.
- 58:25Speaker 1: I mean, he built this massive home. It's 100,000 square feet.
- 58:29Speaker 1: It's grotesque and heinous, vulgar. And this guy then had
- 58:35Speaker 1: trouble selling it. So then he was like, hey, he
- 58:37Speaker 1: went to Westlake Financial. He's like, and this guy's a
- 58:40Speaker 1: billionaire that is building the home. And he goes, well, hey,
- 58:45Speaker 1: why don't I just live in the house and we'll do,
- 58:48Speaker 1: I swear to God, this is all in the article.
- 58:49Speaker 1: He goes, we'll do celebrity boxing events. We'll make our
- 58:52Speaker 1: money another way. We don't have to sell it. We
- 58:54Speaker 1: won't flip it. I got in too deep. I went
- 58:57Speaker 1: too crazy. I spent too much money. He goes, we'll
- 58:59Speaker 1: do celebrity boxing events, and then we'll do, I'll do
- 59:03Speaker 1: the best entertainers in the world, Michael Jackson, Whitney Houston,
- 59:06Speaker 1: and they'll all be holograms. And they'll be holograms. and
- 59:11Speaker 1: then people beating shit out of each other in the
- 59:14Speaker 1: backyard and then holograms of Michael Jackson and Whitney Houston
- 59:19Speaker 1: and that's how we'll make our money instead of flipping
- 59:21Speaker 1: the house read a little bit of the article it
- 59:25Speaker 1: is interesting when you get to this point where you
- 59:28Speaker 1: start building things that are this big And again, you
- 59:31Speaker 1: want to sell it for more money? Lift the sanctions.
- 59:38Speaker 3: Okay, so the mega mansion known as The One sold
- 59:41Speaker 3: Thursday for $ 126 million at a bankruptcy auction.
- 59:44Speaker 1: It's a deal. By the way, $ 126 million for that
- 59:46Speaker 1: house is a steal. It's a steal. $ 126 million. It's
- 59:47Speaker 1: a good price. It's Bel Air prime, prime, prime.
- 1:00:01Speaker 3: That's a huge discount from $ 295 million listing price, even
- 1:00:06Speaker 3: with the 12% auction fee bringing the total to $ 141 million.
- 1:00:11Speaker 3: It set a record for the costliest house sold at auction,
- 1:00:14Speaker 3: but it fell well short of the California sales record
- 1:00:17Speaker 3: set by venture capitalist Mark Andreessen, who purchased a Malibu
- 1:00:20Speaker 3: estate for $ 17. 7 million. So this is still leagues and above.
- 1:00:25Speaker 1: Wait a minute. $ 17. 7? Who gives a fuck? Why is
- 1:00:27Speaker 1: that even in the article? Uh.
- 1:00:30Speaker 3: Oh, they put a period here. It should be $ 177 million. Yeah,
- 1:00:34Speaker 3: I don't know why they put a period there. That
- 1:00:36Speaker 3: doesn't make any sense. The most ever spent on a U.S.
- 1:00:38Speaker 3: residence was $ 238 million by hedge fund mogul Ken Griffin
- 1:00:42Speaker 3: for a New York City penthouse in 2019.
- 1:00:45Speaker 1: Right.
- 1:00:45Speaker 3: Several international sales have surpassed $ 300 million, though. So the
- 1:00:49Speaker 3: buyer will be disclosed by March 8th when paperwork must
- 1:00:52Speaker 3: be submitted.
- 1:00:52Speaker 1: I hope it's Putin. I pray to God it's Putin.
- 1:00:59Speaker 1: What a great show. Putin's in Bel Air.
- 1:01:02Speaker 3: It says the buyer pool for this is very small.
- 1:01:05Speaker 3: And with everything happening in Russia, all of a sudden
- 1:01:07Speaker 3: those Russian billionaires who may have been your best bet
- 1:01:10Speaker 3: to buy it are pulling out.
- 1:01:12Speaker 1: Lift the sanctions. Lift the... It's not their fault they
- 1:01:19Speaker 1: own a yacht. It's not their fault Putin went a
- 1:01:22Speaker 1: little wacky. It's not their fault. Is it Roman Abramovich's fault?
- 1:01:28Speaker 2: It's not.
- 1:01:29Speaker 1: He's got to sell the Chelsea Football Club. It's not
- 1:01:32Speaker 1: his fault. Shout out to Roman Abramovich.
- 1:01:36Speaker 3: It says here, the guy who bought it just got
- 1:01:39Speaker 3: a great deal. He's got people willing to pay $ 50, 000
- 1:01:42Speaker 3: a day just to do commercials and films.
- 1:01:45Speaker 2: I mean, that's going to be a long time to
- 1:01:47Speaker 2: make your money back.
- 1:01:48Speaker 1: That's not a good deal at all. What are you,
- 1:01:50Speaker 1: an idiot? Yeah, well, these people.
- 1:01:54Speaker 2: Are brain dead. Hankey? Who's Hankey?
- 1:01:56Speaker 1: I don't know who Hankey is.
- 1:01:57Speaker 3: Oh, the largest creditor is Los Angeles billionaire Don Hankey,
- 1:02:00Speaker 3: who lent $ 106 million to the dream project of developer
- 1:02:04Speaker 3: Niall Miami.
- 1:02:04Speaker 1: He's a hardscrabble subprime lender scumbag who's got an office,
- 1:02:10Speaker 1: I think, in the Valley, right? Westlake Financial.
- 1:02:13Speaker 2: Westside Realty.
- 1:02:14Speaker 1: Westlake Financial. And he's a real old-school scumbag. And he
- 1:02:20Speaker 1: lent this guy $ 90 million or something?
- 1:02:23Speaker 3: He lent him exactly $ 106 million, and the lender is
- 1:02:26Speaker 3: owed more than $ 130 million in secured debt, including money
- 1:02:30Speaker 3: he provided in bankruptcy to repair and spiff up the property.
- 1:02:34Speaker 1: Yeah, so who did he lend it to? Who did
- 1:02:36Speaker 1: Hankey lend this?
- 1:02:39Speaker 2: The developer, Niall Naimi.
- 1:02:42Speaker 1: Yeah, Niall Naimi, who's a billionaire in L.A., right? I believe.
- 1:02:46Speaker 2: He's a developer. Let me see if he's a billionaire.
- 1:02:48Speaker 2: I don't know if he is.
- 1:02:49Speaker 1: He might not be. I guess he's not if this
- 1:02:54Speaker 1: is all happening.
- 1:02:55Speaker 3: He's an American former film producer turned real estate developer
- 1:02:58Speaker 3: who has built and sold multi-million dollar mansions.
- 1:03:00Speaker 1: Does he have a net worth?
- 1:03:02Speaker 2: Oh, he did point blank.
- 1:03:03Speaker 1: Interesting.
- 1:03:03Speaker 2: Let me see his net worth. Net worth.
- 1:03:07Speaker 3: Niles' net worth is $ 6 billion.
- 1:03:11Speaker 1: Yeah. He's a billionaire. Mm-hmm. And they're still fighting over this. Mm-hmm.
- 1:03:16Speaker 1: And the guy from Westlake Financial is also a billionaire.
- 1:03:18Speaker 3: Mm-hmm.
- 1:03:19Speaker 1: Interesting. What's his worth?
- 1:03:21Speaker 2: Don Hankey?
- 1:03:22Speaker 1: Yeah, Don Hankey. He's just an old school, he's one
- 1:03:26Speaker 1: of the last subprime lenders. Hard money, baby. God, it
- 1:03:31Speaker 1: gives me a hard cock. What a beautiful thing.
- 1:03:33Speaker 2: 5.5 billion.
- 1:03:35Speaker 1: So you have two billionaires fighting over this house, the
- 1:03:40Speaker 1: debt that was lent to build this. By the way,
- 1:03:44Speaker 1: go Google this thing. It is heinous. And I say
- 1:03:49Speaker 1: that fully understanding and appreciating how ostentatious and vulgar L.A.
- 1:03:56Speaker 1: homes usually are, this is especially grotesque. It is ugly
- 1:04:01Speaker 1: in a way that is hard to describe. It is
- 1:04:04Speaker 1: aesthetically displeasing. It is a big waste of money, truly.
- 1:04:10Speaker 1: It is a big waste of money. It is only
- 1:04:14Speaker 1: for some... Billionaire that wants to say that they own
- 1:04:20Speaker 1: the most expensive home in America. And obviously this isn't,
- 1:04:24Speaker 1: but it was supposed to be. It was listed for
- 1:04:26Speaker 1: $ 295 million. It was supposed to be the most expensive
- 1:04:29Speaker 1: home in America. So again, who would want that? Oligarch,
- 1:04:34Speaker 1: a sheik, Saudi, somebody, Chinese amusement park tycoon, Russian fertilizer magnate.
- 1:04:44Speaker 1: It's a small buyer's pool. But I mean, go look
- 1:04:47Speaker 1: at this house, and they call it the one. It
- 1:04:50Speaker 1: is obnoxious beyond anything that you can even... It's not
- 1:04:56Speaker 1: even nice. Are you looking at it?
- 1:04:59Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, it's in the article.
- 1:05:01Speaker 1: It has like a moat around it. It's like a
- 1:05:03Speaker 1: swimming pool. And it looks like a moat.
- 1:05:07Speaker 2: Yeah, it's dumb.
- 1:05:09Speaker 1: But I'm rooting for Don Hankey, the hard money lender.
- 1:05:13Speaker 3: Yeah, so he took over his father's dealership in 1972
- 1:05:16Speaker 3: and he built the Hankey Group. And its main business
- 1:05:19Speaker 3: being Westlake Financial Services, which makes subprime car loans.
- 1:05:23Speaker 1: Here's the thing with a guy like Don Hankey. No
- 1:05:24Speaker 1: matter how much money he has, they still treat him
- 1:05:27Speaker 1: like scum. Like that other guy, Niles, a developer, and
- 1:05:30Speaker 1: he hangs out with the beautiful people. And Don Hankey
- 1:05:33Speaker 1: is just, he's a sunburned. low-class scumbag.
- 1:05:39Speaker 2: He is, actually.
- 1:05:40Speaker 1: I'm looking him up. No, he's a real drunk. And
- 1:05:43Speaker 1: no matter what, he's not in that Hollywood glitterati respected.
- 1:05:49Speaker 1: He's an unfortunate-looking guy. Even though he's a billionaire, he's
- 1:05:54Speaker 1: a used car salesman. He's got the stink of used
- 1:05:58Speaker 1: cars on him. And he got swindled into lending this Nile,
- 1:06:02Speaker 1: this Hollywood... playboy, real estate developer, film producer, probably just
- 1:06:08Speaker 1: fucking tens all day, and Don Hankey. The name Hankey
- 1:06:13Speaker 1: sounds like handkerchief. You know, he is just, but that's
- 1:06:18Speaker 1: why I root for him, because he's just got soot
- 1:06:21Speaker 1: on his red, sunburnt face, and he's just trying to
- 1:06:25Speaker 1: recoup his money. And even though he's a billionaire, you
- 1:06:29Speaker 1: just look at him, you go, he's one of those
- 1:06:32Speaker 1: where they don't want him in the club. They don't
- 1:06:35Speaker 1: want him in the country club. They don't want him anywhere.
- 1:06:37Speaker 1: He's got a couple of properties in Malibu, but they
- 1:06:39Speaker 1: don't want him anywhere. They don't want Don Hankey.
- 1:06:45Speaker 3: This was expected to hit the market at $ 500 million
- 1:06:48Speaker 3: when they first built it.
- 1:06:49Speaker 1: They were mentally ill here.
- 1:06:50Speaker 2: Yeah, they really took a bath here.
- 1:06:53Speaker 1: And the buyer is going to be revealed.
- 1:06:55Speaker 2: March 8th.
- 1:06:56Speaker 1: March 8th. Who do you think it's going to be?
- 1:07:03Speaker 3: Well, it's 105,000 square feet, right? You have a big
- 1:07:07Speaker 3: 50-seat theater. You have nine bedrooms, multiple kitchens. This is big.
- 1:07:13Speaker 3: This is a big, big place. It's got to be.
- 1:07:17Speaker 3: So it's probably not a Russian oligarch, right?
- 1:07:19Speaker 1: Yeah.
- 1:07:20Speaker 2: It's probably not a Russian.
- 1:07:21Speaker 1: I hope it's Nancy Pelosi. It's probably not a Russian.
- 1:07:28Speaker 2: Probably not a Russian.
- 1:07:29Speaker 1: It's an Arab.
- 1:07:30Speaker 2: So it's probably a Saudi.
- 1:07:31Speaker 1: It's an Arab. It may not be a Saudi. Could
- 1:07:34Speaker 1: be a Qatari. Somebody from the United Arab Emirates. It's
- 1:07:38Speaker 1: an Arab. Or it's somebody from China. But I don't know.
- 1:07:44Speaker 1: Because of COVID and everything.
- 1:07:45Speaker 3: But we won't know because it'll just be the name
- 1:07:47Speaker 3: of their company, their offshore thing.
- 1:07:49Speaker 1: Most likely, unless they want you to know they own it.
- 1:07:54Speaker 1: They may want you to know they own it. I
- 1:07:56Speaker 1: don't know. It's hard for me to know. But I
- 1:07:59Speaker 1: do want to say this. I don't trust all the
- 1:08:03Speaker 1: Ukrainian propaganda, but this is a legit, real story. David
- 1:08:07Speaker 1: Dobrik is fighting with that Nazi regiment in Ukraine right
- 1:08:09Speaker 1: now against the Russians. And I think that's pretty fucking cool,
- 1:08:14Speaker 1: to be honest. I think it's pretty fucking cool that
- 1:08:18Speaker 1: David Dobrik right now is embedded fighting with the Azov
- 1:08:23Speaker 1: Nazi Ukrainian battalion. I think that's pretty fucking impressive. And frankly...
- 1:08:30Speaker 1: We don't need to go over the fact that they're Nazis.
- 1:08:32Speaker 1: What's important is that they are the elite fighting force
- 1:08:35Speaker 1: of the Ukraine. And Dobrik, one of our best cancelled YouTubers,
- 1:08:40Speaker 1: has decided to take it upon himself to go fight
- 1:08:44Speaker 1: with them to hold off Russia. I think that's pretty impressive.
- 1:08:50Speaker 1: Don't you? Yeah. It's the official position of the Tim
- 1:08:55Speaker 1: Dillon Show at this juncture to lift all sanctions. And
- 1:08:59Speaker 1: until September.
- 1:09:01Speaker 1: Until after Labor Day and then we'll talk about it
- 1:09:03Speaker 1: we'll see what's been done if Putin can't get that
- 1:09:05Speaker 1: place you know if he can't steamroll them to Labor
- 1:09:08Speaker 1: Day I mean come on if he can't take that
- 1:09:11Speaker 1: by Labor Day we got a real problem and I
- 1:09:14Speaker 1: don't know what's gonna happen a lot of people gonna
- 1:09:16Speaker 1: be angry with me because oh you were so sympathetic
- 1:09:18Speaker 1: to the Ukrainians I am You know how much gas
- 1:09:21Speaker 1: it takes to fill up a boat? I'm just saying,
- 1:09:30Speaker 1: we can't throw out the baby with the bathwater. Do
- 1:09:33Speaker 1: you get it? Do you understand what I mean here?
- 1:09:37Speaker 1: Or do I sound like a fucking heartless psychopath? Because
- 1:09:40Speaker 1: you know what? I don't think I do. I think
- 1:09:43Speaker 1: for the first time in my life, I'm making sense.
- 1:09:46Speaker 1: I mean, truly, what do you think? What do you feel?
- 1:09:50Speaker 3: I think I'm with you, but we got to bring
- 1:09:52Speaker 3: back the sanctions in the fall, though. I think it
- 1:09:54Speaker 3: should just be a seasonal sanction. So that way they
- 1:10:00Speaker 3: know they got to cool off at some point. And
- 1:10:02Speaker 3: then they can return back to the killing and the
- 1:10:05Speaker 3: bombing in the high season.
- 1:10:10Speaker 1: I personally don't love revisiting it before Jan. Because... No, no.
- 1:10:19Speaker 1: And you need to hear me out here. The fall
- 1:10:24Speaker 1: is very, very, very lovely at the wineries. There's a
- 1:10:28Speaker 1: lot of bed and breakfast. And then you go right
- 1:10:31Speaker 1: into ski season. I think we do sanctions for the
- 1:10:37Speaker 1: month of January and February every single year until they
- 1:10:40Speaker 1: leave Ukraine. That's it. That's it. Sanctions January and February
- 1:10:47Speaker 1: every single year until they leave Ukraine. Yes or yes?
- 1:10:53Speaker 2: Yeah, because it would suck around Christmas if it was
- 1:10:54Speaker 2: just to turn on the TV.
- 1:10:55Speaker 1: Oh, it would suck. Oh, it would really suck.
- 1:10:57Speaker 2: Yeah.
- 1:11:00Speaker 1: January and February sanctions every year until they leave Ukraine.
- 1:11:04Speaker 1: Am I right or am I right? I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
- 1:11:12Speaker 1: Sorry it's an audio-only this week, but we're on tour,
- 1:11:15Speaker 1: and we have dates coming in Nashville, in Jacksonville, in Charlotte,
- 1:11:26Speaker 1: in New Orleans, in Dallas, in Houston, in Cleveland, in Cincinnati.
- 1:11:34Speaker 1: We're shooting this special in March. It won't be out
- 1:11:36Speaker 1: until early May, so for the month of April, I'm
- 1:11:38Speaker 1: going to do a lot of markets I haven't done.
- 1:11:40Speaker 1: And we'll do the show live. We've had a lot
- 1:11:42Speaker 1: of fun with it. And then we will spend the
- 1:11:45Speaker 1: spring and the summer chilling out, podcasting, making some other content,
- 1:11:50Speaker 1: working on a book, hopefully enjoying, you know, again, but
- 1:11:56Speaker 1: if we lift the sanctions, we've got to make a
- 1:11:57Speaker 1: deal about the gas. We've got to make a good deal.
- 1:12:02Speaker 1: I mean a good deal. But we're in a position
- 1:12:05Speaker 1: now to make a really, really good deal with him
- 1:12:09Speaker 1: for cheap Oil, daddy! I mean, that's the only thing
- 1:12:23Speaker 1: that I can really think of right now that would
- 1:12:26Speaker 1: make sense. And it's unfortunate that that's where we are.
- 1:12:32Speaker 1: But I also think there's something about self-determination that is
- 1:12:42Speaker 1: very important that we as a society have to say
- 1:12:46Speaker 1: there are things we enjoy and there are things we
- 1:12:50Speaker 1: don't enjoy. And we have to get back to figuring
- 1:12:54Speaker 1: out how to enjoy more and have more fun and
- 1:12:59Speaker 1: be less. We need to bicker less. Truly. I think
- 1:13:06Speaker 1: instead of fighting about this war, we ignore it. We
- 1:13:11Speaker 1: remove all sanctions, get cheap gas, and go swimming. Put
- 1:13:19Speaker 1: a couple of dogs and burgers on the grill. Right?
- 1:13:25Speaker 1: You cannot hear Carviv being shelled over a kid rock
- 1:13:29Speaker 1: song if you blast it hard enough. It's time to
- 1:13:33Speaker 1: have the summer we deserve. The summer we've earned. Doesn't
- 1:13:38Speaker 1: matter who's right or wrong. Doesn't matter. It's time now.
- 1:13:44Speaker 1: It's time to enjoy our summer. We'll revisit this in
- 1:13:49Speaker 1: January of next year. Let's give it a year. Let's
- 1:13:54Speaker 1: take a beat. Let's take a beat. That's the episode title.
- 1:14:00Speaker 1: Let's take a beat. Because that's what we really have
- 1:14:03Speaker 1: to do. And a lot of people are upset with
- 1:14:06Speaker 1: me right now because I've solved this. And people hate
- 1:14:10Speaker 1: when I'm right. There's a lot of people out there
- 1:14:13Speaker 1: that don't like when I'm right. They go, oh boy,
- 1:14:16Speaker 1: that's uncomfortable. Comedian, right again, solving world issues again. But what,
- 1:14:21Speaker 1: do you not want me to do it? You want
- 1:14:24Speaker 1: me to leave it up to these scumbags in Congress?
- 1:14:27Speaker 1: I've just done it. Take an 11-month pause here on this.
- 1:14:34Speaker 1: And let's enjoy ourselves. Let's enjoy ourselves in the spoils.
- 1:14:39Speaker 1: What good is an empire if you can't even have fun?
- 1:14:44Speaker 1: If we're going to live in this morally compromised hellscape
- 1:14:47Speaker 1: that was built on the blood and bones of people,
- 1:14:50Speaker 1: can't we enjoy it? Thanks for listening.