Latest / Tabernacle Talk - A Bible Study Podcast with Pastor Bryon Self / 17.6 - James 1:19-21 - How To Deal With Anger and Difficult Conversations

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17.6 - James 1:19-21 - How To Deal With Anger and Difficult Conversations · Tabernacle Talk - A Bible Study Podcast with Pastor Bryon Self

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  Welcome to Tabernacle Talk. Tabernacle Talk is a Bible study
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  podcast from Tabernacle Baptist Church in Essex, MD.
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  We hope that this podcast will help you to know Christ, grow in
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  his word, and show his love to others.
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  Let's dive right in. Welcome back to Tabernacle Talk.
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  Today we are in James one and verses 19 through 21.
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  This is kind of special for me. My very first sermon that I ever
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  preached back in 6th grade was on James 119 through 21.
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  And so this is a, a near and dear portion of scripture to me.
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  And I, I think I mentioned in the last episode, it's probably
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  been 1617 years since I preached that.
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  And so looking forward to diving into God's word with you today
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  once again, just by way of a summary of like where we are,
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  what we're doing it in the book of James.
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  The book of James is written from the pastor at Jerusalem,
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  James, the half brother of Jesus.
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  And he's writing to people that were once a part of his
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  congregation, but due to persecution, they'd been
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  scattered all across the Roman Empire.
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  So he's writing to them some things that they need to know
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  and adopt and be encouraged and challenged in for their
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  Christian walk wherever they are.
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  And so we're going to pick up today in verses 19 through 21,
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  going to read through the verses and then we'll learn together.
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  He says, My dear brothers and sisters, understand this.
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  Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow
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  to anger, for human anger does not accomplish God's
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  righteousness. Therefore, riding yourselves of
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  all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent, humbly
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  receive the implanted word which is able to save your souls.
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  Love these verses. And we're going to start off in
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  verse #19 here. My dear brothers and sisters,
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  understand this. There's something vital that you
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  and I have got to know. He says everyone should be quick
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  to listen, slow to speak and slow to anger.
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  First here, quick to listen. That we would speedily be those
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  that choose to exercise the faculty of hearing.
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  So many times in my life I am. I'm quick to speak and I am slow
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  to listen. But when we listen to others, it
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  will help us out in so many ways in our lives.
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  Number one, people will feel more loved by us when we are
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  quick to just hear. Proverbs would say this to us
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  that even a fool when he holds his tongue is considered wise
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  and man. That is so, so true when you
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  have people, I know there's someones in my life, some dear
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  friends, even some dear friends at Tabernacle that they, they
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  don't say a whole lot and they're not always running their
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  mouth. And it means that when they do
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  end up talking, everyone wants to listen because they go, oh
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  man, this is, you know, if you will, this is new, this isn't
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  normal. And I got to be honest as a, as
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  a pastor and as someone that like a large portion of my job
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  means that I've got to say some words.
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  This is something that I am constantly like asking the Lord
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  for some wisdom on that. I would be like, all right, God,
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  I know that I'm going to be saying words, but I just I don't
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  want to simply speak for the sake of speaking.
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  When I talk, I want it to be the words of God that I'm saying.
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  I don't want to say my own thoughts.
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  I don't want to be led by just whatever fancy fits me at the
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  moment. Instead, I want to have
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  something meaningful to be able to speak into others lives.
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  One great way to improve your speaking is to listen to others
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  and to respond back to others in in a way that shows that you
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  were listening. So just some practical
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  applications of this. When someone asks you to pray
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  for something with them, either number one, pray with them right
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  then and there for it. My friend Owen does that a lot.
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  And I've had many friends through the years that have that
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  have done that. And that's always a blessing to
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  me #2 when someone has asked you to pray for something, ask them
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  later about it or be like, hey, you asked me to pray for this
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  family member. How's that situation going?
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  Or have they heard anything new back yet?
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  I got to be honest, there's probably 1000 different ways in
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  which I can improve in that. One of the other things is that
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  as a pastor, I get so many prayer requests and I'm so
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  grateful for it. It's why I try to write down
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  whatever I can So many times when someone asked me like, hey,
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  would you pray for this? I try to put like a reminder on
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  my phone. I put it like, if it's a surgery
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  or doctor's appointment or something, I try to put it on my
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  calendar. So that way I'll see it that day
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  and we'll know, OK, this is happening at, you know, 10 AM
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  for them. And so I'm going to be praying
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  for them. I, I try to find some like if
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  you will trick some ways, because my brain, my memory,
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  it's not good enough to always remember everything that I need
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  to remember for people. And so for you even as well, you
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  can utilize, you've got a phone, you've got a laptop, you've got
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  a tablet, whatever. Use those tools to be able to
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  help you to listen better in conversation with someone.
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  That seems to be at least partially what James is looking
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  at here in these verses is because we are to be quick to
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  listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger.
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  It seems to be in our conversations with people,
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  especially when there is disagreement or perhaps someone
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  was offended or, or something. When we're in those kinds of
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  conversations with people, we're not just listening for, OK, how
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  can I respond? We want to listen for all right.
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  I want to understand where they're coming from, what
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  they're saying, what they're like goals or expectations are
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  for the outcome of this conversation.
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  And I want to, you know, I, I want to at the very least be
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  able to articulate it back to them in a way that is that shows
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  that I've been listening and that I care and that I
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  understand where they're coming from.
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  Now, even as a pastor, there are times where someone, you know,
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  maybe wants to do something at the church and maybe we don't
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  have the resources for it. Maybe we don't have the time for
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  it. Maybe something, you know,
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  doesn't have a place within a a Christian worship service.
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  Like it doesn't fit in in that Ave. and I might have to say no,
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  like like we, we can't do that. But if I can say that and
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  articulate that paired with, Hey, here's what I hear you
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  saying, here's what you love. Here's here's like your goal in
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  this and those are all really great things.
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  And especially if I listen and I understand, then God might give
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  me some ability to say, Hey, this doesn't work in this
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  particular scenario or in this particular way.
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  But what if we, you know, channeled that energy?
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  What if we did this thing in this place or at this time or
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  with this group of people or in like a smaller scale than what
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  you were thinking? That is, that's just such a
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  benefit to people that they would be able to experience and
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  know love because they've genuinely been listened to.
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  That's something I, I confident I screw up in every single week.
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  Any spouse probably feels that way that they screw up, but that
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  is something that I want to pursue in my life because it's
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  valuable and it's valuable for you as well.
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  So everyone should be quick to listen.
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  Everyone should be slow to speak, that we would not rush
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  into answering. We're not just waiting for
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  people to stop talking so then we can put in our two cents, but
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  that we would genuinely realize all right, in the multitude of
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  words, there is no lack of sin, as Proverbs tells us.
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  And so I want to be very careful that the words that I would say
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  would be from the word of God. So everyone should be quick to
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  listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger.
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  This is one of the ways that God is described over and over and
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  over again in the Old Testament. I think I've mentioned before
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  that phrase is long of nostril in Hebrew is kind of the idiom
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  for it kind of in the same way that we would use the phrase
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  they've got a short fuse would be something that we'd say,
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  which is like, you know, dynamite or some explosive that
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  has just a short fuse and then it explodes.
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  That long of nostril in Hebrew is like for, for a breath of
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  fury or anger. Like when you, you know, you
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  take a deep breath before you or, or, or when you're angry,
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  someone might tell you, hey, you know, take a deep breath, like
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  take a step back. That's the idea of the phrase
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  long of nostril, slow to anger, that it's almost as if God is
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  consistently going all right, here's this thing that I could
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  fly off the handle for, but he goes and he is slow to anger.
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  And that's how we ought to act too, man.
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  A person that's always easily offended, a person that is
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  always flying off the handle, a person that always has some
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  grievance in their life that, oh, I can't believe my family
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  member did this and this waitress at the restaurant did
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  this. And you know, this person at the
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  church stole my seat or did this or that.
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  And you know, the government is this and this and that.
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  Kind of like cantankerous, easily angered, constantly
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  angered against anyone and everything has no place in the
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  life of a believer. That's not who we're called to
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  be. We're called to be quick to
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  listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger.
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  Then James tells us in verse 20 why we should be slow to anger.
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  He says for human anger does not accomplish God's righteousness.
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  This word accomplish would be the Greek word ergon where we
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  would get the word ergonomics. It's human anger doesn't produce
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  God's righteousness and that's what we're called to do 2nd
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  Corinthians 5 and verse 21 that he made him to be sin, to become
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  sin for us so that we might become the righteousness of God
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  in Him every single day. We are called not just to live
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  our existence, but we are to live out the righteousness of
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  God, the the right behavior. Yeah, living in right
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  relationship with God and with others.
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  We're called to accomplish, to produce God's righteousness each
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  and every day. And you cannot accomplish God's
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  righteousness through human anger.
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  You can't. This is what it says.
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  Human anger does not accomplish God's righteousness.
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  The more angry that you are in your life and the more
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  situations that make you angry, you can know that in those
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  moments and in those areas, you are not showing people what God
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  is like, because that's not how God interacts.
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  That's not how God's treated you.
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  And so why in the world would you insist on adopting that as
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  your mindset? Don't do that.
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  And I'm, I'm just looking in the camera.
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  I'm looking at the little like box thing of my face.
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  I'm I'm not angry at any one of you.
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  I know in my life I'm angry far too often.
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  I'm not angry for the right reasons.
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  I'm not angry at my sin nearly as much as I get angry at other
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  people and their shortcomings. But human anger doesn't
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  accomplish God's righteousness. Verse #21 All right, so what's
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  the counter to this? How do we not be angry?
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  How do we follow God? Therefore, riding yourselves,
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  taking it off. This phrase would be normally
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  used like of clothing that it says instead of putting this on
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  every day, take it off every day.
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  It says riding yourselves of all moral filth.
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  This would be a state of moral defilement or corruption, moral
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  uncleanness or vulgarity. This would be evil speaking as
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  well as evil actions, just things that are not in line with
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  the character of God. So he says, take off that stuff,
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  that moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent, that is
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  evil that is in abundance. It's beyond a regular or
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  expected amount. And so riding ourselves of evil,
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  of human anger, of just constant words of, you know, slander or
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  gossip or vulgar talk that we'd say, I want no part to do with
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  any of that. And instead it says, humbly
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  receive the implanted word which is able to save your souls.
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  OK, what's the opposite of being angry all the time?
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  It is receiving God's Word. It's reflecting on the gospel,
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  the message of Jesus, that you are fully and freely forgiven
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  forever through what Jesus accomplished on your behalf in
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  his life and in his death, on the cross and in his
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  resurrection. That you are made a child of
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  God. You have been placed into his
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  family and you are called you. You've been given the Holy
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  Spirit to live inside of you, and you are called to work out,
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  to accomplish, to produce God's righteousness in your life.
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  The opposite of anger and evil speaking is the word of God.
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  I I love the verse in I think it's Psalm 119.
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  I I have to look up the reference again, but it says
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  great peace. Have those that love your law
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  and nothing will offend them. If you're constantly angry,
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  offended, upset, choose instead of that to turn to the Word of
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  God. Look at how God is patient with
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  you and long-suffering. How He has endured every evil
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  thing that you have ever said or done and yet He's not written
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  you off him. He and He hasn't killed you.
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  He hasn't brought you to justice for every wrong thing you've
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  done and instead He's been patient and kind and loving.
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  He has spoken words of life to and over you.
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  And so that's what we're called to do as well.
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  That we would not live our lives in anger, but instead we would
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  live our lives in love of the Word of God.
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  And as we turn to the Word of God over and over and over
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  again, it says it is able to save your souls.
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  That you would be transformed to be able to listen well and show
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  people love through how you listen.
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  God's word would transform you. That you would learn to be slow
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  to speak, that you would be slow to anger because you recognize
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  who you are and how God has treated you and what God thinks
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  of other people and how he has called you to act and to speak
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  and to love and to think of others.
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  So when it comes to those moments of anger, of hard
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  conversations with other people, choose to walk in the light of
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  the Word of God. Because the more and more that
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  you think about those truths, as you think about like in
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  Ephesians 432, be kind one to another, tender hearted,
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  forgiving one another, just as God for Christ's sake has
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  forgiven you. As you think about verses like
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  that, as you think about verses like don't be deceived for
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  whatever a person sows, that is what they are going to reap.
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  So don't, don't become weary and well doing because you know that
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  you will reap if you do not faint.
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  As you think about those kinds of verses about the love and the
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  forgiveness of Jesus, Now we're to pass it on.
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  That will help you with your anger because you remember, Oh
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  yeah, I'm not the judge and jury.
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  I'm just here to love and appoint people to Jesus.
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  I'm here to produce the righteousness of God in my life.
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  God will bring justice. God will do what's right in this
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  situation all on his own. He doesn't need my help.
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  Vengeance is mine. I will repay, says the Lord, as
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  we would hear from the end of Romans 12.
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  So as a result, how do we deal with anger with the word of God?
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  We understand it, we humbly receive it, and we say, God, you
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  do what's right. I'm going to listen, I'm going
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  to love, I'm going to produce your righteousness, and I'm not
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  going to engage in evil speaking or in evil actions or attitudes.
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  Thanks for tuning in. Hope you have a wonderful day.