Latest / Tea Time w/Amie & Bev / Episode #158: Past Life Energy Clearing

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Episode #158: Past Life Energy Clearing · Tea Time w/Amie & Bev

0:02
I welcome to tea time with Amy and Bev. Good day, Good day,
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my friend. How are you doing. I came to a realization yesterday,
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so today's Tuesday for us right now, yesterday Monday, that I am
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in the middle of doing some clearing four past life stuff, and that past
0:33
life has to do with my witch life, gotcha or a life similar too.
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I was like, Wow, this is really happening right now and it
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and it On one hand, it's very interesting, I mean absolutely interesting to
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me, you know, I just love that stuff. On the other hand,
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I noticed some frustration come up and and I'm like, wow, we're
1:06
still doing this. Okay. So it's layers, right, it's layers.
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It's it's it's changing, you know, change, it's changing experiences that we've
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had before, our perspective on those experiences and how we're going to move forward.
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Yeah, So it is, it's it's a it's a lot. But
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you couldn't have gotten to that point without you know, you uncovered a lot
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of other stuff to get to the point where you're at right now. And
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to me, this is this is almost easy stuff because we can be and
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and I'm saying that because one of the things I've noticed recently that came up
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and I don't. And my realization was last night, I don't really feel
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like it's from this lifetime. But being territorial, it could be territorial over
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a relationship, territorial over a parking spot, territorial over my space. This
1:55
is my space and that the other night I did that funny table. Yeah,
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but it's just right. So how do you know? But twice in
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the same night, that's all well. And I've had a few experiences.
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I had an experience at home before I left, and then I had the
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experience when I got to work, and it was so funny because my perspective
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when I was in that space and I was like, oh, the territory
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on their perched right in my spot and blah blah blah blah blah. I
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don't know what this ship is. And I was like just really going this
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was this was I wasn't really in that space. I was in that space
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before. I was seeing my first client, right, my first client's there
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and he's like, you see what's backed up here right here, like backed
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up right caddy corner. I mean, it's right and blocking my space and
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everything I can get into it. It's all right. It's wasn't like I
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couldn't walk on the sidework for God's sake, dramatic. But I'm walking up
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to the space and he's like, do you notice there's a moving van right
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there? And I said yeah, I said yes, walking my way and
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he says, yeah, but don't you think there's a bigger message here and
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the big and so it's but I couldn't see that message right because I was
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focused on the other the way that I was feeling. So now I'm talking
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now and I and it's funny because then I noticed a few other things if
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I, um, I don't like not being good enough for as good as
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someone else's doing, something like that. And then I stopped for a second
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and I'm like, okay, in her child, you're perfect. What are
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you worried about? So it's like I'm now I never did this stuff before,
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but now I'm here just getting into it. But now I'm now I'm
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like talking to that child's like this, it is that so important? Why
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why are you not having fun? Because to me, right now I got
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the biggest thing in the whole wide world, it is for us just a
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freaking love. I want to love everybody. I want to love everything.
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I want to love me one hundred percent. I want to love everything.
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That's all I want to do. I just want to love. And I
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don't know what that looks like yet because it hasn't been my experience. But
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I'm learning y and it's just like everything out it's a practice, yeah,
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right, it's a practice. And there are some people of personality that are
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a little more challenging for us to love. And and really if you if
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you think about it, you can still love them on that deeper level,
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right from spirit level. You're still loving. Now. Love is sending that
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love. UM. It's the cloudiness of the human side that we see through
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the eyes of um experience. And that's where the challenge comes up. So
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if we took that out of the equation, we would love, you know,
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and we kind of need some of that stuff. Like we're obviously the
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experience, right, We're not going to keep touching the stove over and over
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and over again. We've already had the experience. We know that we're gonna
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get you know, you're gonna get burned. But it's like sometimes I feel
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like when we sometimes I think most often we carry this old stuff with us
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that we think this is gonna like our book, were growing our book real
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quick, old gosh. Kendal's experience. I've had this before. I don't
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know what it looks like. Oh okay, yeah, just close your eyes,
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turn your back, and start running the opposite direction, you know,
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just silly things, right, It's just the only things. But I don't
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really feel like it's that necessary to be doing that stuff. It's like,
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really to sit there and process, why are you filling this way? Unless
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you've got a freaking tiger chasing you. Obviously that's a little bit of a
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different situation, but still, yeah, is the tiger really chasing you?
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I don't know. Yeah. Well, and I'm just going to go back
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to the experience that I am having right now is that I'm in this women's
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organization and there are some of the people I've been in there for four years,
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I think four years, and there have been some members that I had
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no desire to get close to. And over the weekend, actually last Friday,
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had a conversation with one of the members who who um, in a
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sense, had taken me under her wing and she's helped me and um,
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she's a supporter of what I do, and um. She was telling me
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so in this interesting She's like wow. Um. In the conversation, it
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came up that I am labeled a pagan. I'm like, I don't even
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know what the hell that means. To be honest with you, I just
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sped before we got on this. I'm like, well, what is that
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and notes what what pagan is it is? And I'm like, okay,
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So anyway, because I'm not mainstream, I'm that umum, because I don't.
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She didn't clarify, she didn't say it's because of this, this and
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this. She just well, some people feel like you're a pagan. Okay.
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I didn't get into it. I just thought, well, whatever,
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So I had to process that. I've been processing that for a few days,
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and yesterday it came up like one of the one knot that I know
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that this particular person is one who is labeling me. If you need to
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go back to the video where we watched where we talked about being labeled,
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but one of the ladies sat next to me last Thursday, and I don't
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know she's in the group that's calling me this whatever. But anyway, yesterday,
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as I'm kind of prossed. Now these notes that I just showed you,
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I just did that this morning, just before we got on this.
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Yesterday, I was like, she totally fits the physical features of the days
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of people being condemned as witches. And she is one that I have never
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felt close to or have had any desire to feel close to. And then
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yesterday I'm like, huh, I bet she was one that was there when
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I was burned at the steak. So so now I'm like thinking about the
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different people in the in the in the organization and just going through them and
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noticing how I feel, you know that energy right, how I feel about
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them, and have I gotten close to them? How come I haven't gotten
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close to them? And just doing that internal dialogue with each one, And
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and then there are some that I can tell who were absolutely like living the
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life of a witch at that time quote unquote witch. I mean we're practice
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seeing the things that we're able to practice today. Um, there are the
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ones that we're doing witchy stuff or labeled, which there are ones that are
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supporters of and there's you could tell they are were the ones that are the
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underground that makes sense. So I'm just so underground, meaning the underground meaning
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that you had. They're pretty powerful, but they stay quiet, yeah underground.
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Okay, Okay, so they didn't get burned or drowned or whatever.
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Right, So I'm going through each member in my head. Now when I
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go to the next meeting, I'll have even more of a visual um and
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I'll even recognize right now that I'm aware of this. Now I can,
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when I'm actually in their presence, really tune into that the energy between us.
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And it's not like I'm gonna have these conversations with because then definitely think
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I'm on the deep end, but just noticing that there's some energy to clear
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up here, and the idea that these people who are let me put it
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this way, there are only there's about there's around forty members. There's about
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thirty that attend regularly, and there might be might be a handful who's gotten
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to know me. So it's like, are the people who are putting this
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label on me? Have they taken the time to get to know me?
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Do they know that? In my and I can tell you that not one
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of them, Oh, I gotta think in my head, I don't think
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any of them have been to any of my classes to know how I teach,
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gotcha that I practice love just like what you're saying. I want to
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love and I teach love right to be into better in yourself, to forgive,
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to heal, to grow, to expand, like I use all these
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terms, these terms that they don't understand because they've never been witnessed too me
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in my teaching environment. Now, I've spoken to the group a couple of
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times, but not on the level of what I would do in a class.
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A class is much more intimate and deeper connection. Not one of them
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has been to any of my events, So it's like that, interesting,
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are you following the crowd who's labeling me like they did back then? Why
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hasn't anybody gotten to know me? Well, Amy, what do you believe
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or what do you practice? Or do you believe in a higher pattern?
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Nothing? None of those conversations except for with one person, and that's the
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person I talked to this past week, and her and I've had other conversations.
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So it's like, I really feel it's all coming to clearing up that
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energy and it's for me on my part to heal and do some forgiveness work
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around that lifetime to clear up some of that energy and I'm okay with that.
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I can handle that's easy. But the whole thought, the frustration piece,
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was for God's sake, are we seriously still doing this? But we're
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going to continue doing this this and that's not going to be the end of
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this, because these are people that are are You could say the word energy.
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You could have just used the word energy and that is it, and
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it would have thrown them off. And that's already been base. But that
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could have been it. That could have it could have just been that.
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Now you're a pagan, right that you could have said or done anything,
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and they formed an opinion about it out of fear. So it's remembering it's
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fear again. We're also knowing that a lot of the planet is in a
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space of fear. Not a lot, but let's just use we could say
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half. Let's just say half of the people are are in a space of
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fear, and so they're so whatever however they're moving forward, fear is always
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going to rule. And I would also say, this is a group contract.
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Yeah, so this you're coming forward on a group group contract. So
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what's the best thing you can do exactly what you're already doing showing up and
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showing love and not having an opinion or anything because they've labeled do right.
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Okay, cool, thanks for the label, man, But but it's but
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that's not something that's not a label that you're going to honor because that's limiting.
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That's a limiting thought. So it doesn't even So it really doesn't matter.
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I say that in my experience, I've been labeled a lot of things.
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I've been being called a cheater, I've been being called um. Doesn't
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really matter labels, but being called just different things. Because being my husband
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had separated everything like that, there's like so many people right now that won't
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even like don't even talk to me at all, and like they can walk
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by me in the store and don't say anything and happen said all kinds of
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stuff about me, right, But to me, that's a fear place.
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That's like, that's like, let me keep myself distracted by talking about this
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person because I can't look at myself. And that's okay, that's all right.
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These people are afraid to look at themselves. They wouldn't even have an
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understanding. That's a that's a kind of a hard thing to understand anyways,
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to go through that process and be like, oh my god, I was
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one of those people that condemned her in the previous lifetime when we burned her
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at the steak, and to watch someone actually burning at the steak, which
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thankfully I've never had that experience in the it's lifetime that it's fresh on my
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mind. Although as I'm saying it, I can see it, like I
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can see it happening and being right there. So that's weird. It is
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because like I could see myself being next to me. I know now because
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I'm just seeing like I am seeing myself there, and it's kind of crazy.
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It's almost like from a movie, like when you'd be having a conversation
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and having this about this these feelings right then while it was happening, but
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realizing at the same time that I was we were gonna be okay, because
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like when you think about these near death experiences and stuff you hear, we
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hear so much stuff about gosh. I just listened to one just recently and
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he just kept telling her the spirit spirit kept telling her stop thinking. Just
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stop thinking unless you thought, yeah, and receive that information, right.
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But that's so this is a valuable information to go through that whole process and
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for even for her and that experience to be you know, her husband tried
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to her because she was worth a million dollar policy and like all these things,
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and for her to have forgiveness because nothing ever happened to him. So
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they're probably a contract when they came in. But she was able to make
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it through all this, even with everything that had happened, and she made
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it through with a different perspective, with a whole different perspective, and to
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forgive anyways, because some of these people get stuck in those ideals and they've
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never evolved from it. And it's such a blessing that we have evolved.
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But then there's going to be something that it will evolve. And if they
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hear one teeny tiny little statement about love and it makes some questions, something
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you've made a difference, so it doesn't even freaking matter, right, But
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there's a reason because it's I feel like I have an understanding what you're talking
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about, but I have I feel like you didn't need Oh, I don't
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know if I'm done or if bev froth soe like. And they don't realize
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that, some of them don't realize it yet. You got to say that
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over again because you froze. Okay, you because you froze. Oh,
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for my side, I keep seeing it like you'll stop and then I don't
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hear you. All right, Well, hopefully they got that. Well.
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I was saying that they need you, do you know what I mean?
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They need you. They needed you in this whole group because it's for their
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growth. It's for your growth to you, because you're just you're stutting and
17:26
letting go things. So this isn't a big deal for you. This is
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a big deal for them, right And it's an opportunity for them to make
17:33
a decision. It's their choice, so they can stay in the limited mind.
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What's interesting is when I joined, I had been in this group several
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years ago, but life happened and I got out. I was only in
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it from about a year and a half two years, and then I came
17:51
back. And the reason why I came back is because I was leaning more
17:55
towards This is the time when I was leaning more towards seeking those people who
18:00
could be the example of leadership for me, right standing and confidence because I
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was wanting that in me for my business and moving forward in life and that's
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why I joined. I'm like, well, there's a lot of powerful women
18:15
in this group. I'm gonna go check it right. Well, then I
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got in and after a minute I was like, uh, that things weren't
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driving. Let's just put it that. Yes, they were confident as businesswomen
18:33
and collectively getting things done, but there were still the talking behind the bag
18:38
and putting people in. I'm just like, yeah, this is not what
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I came for. So not kidding you. This year, I've been questioning
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why am I here? Why am I in this group? What is and
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you're questioning it right now? What's coming forward? It's time for you to
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cut that contract. A contract is done and you're still staying there. Well,
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it's it's I just realize that it's to clear up some of this energy.
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So I'm like, okay, I want to see this through because this
19:10
is really interesting to me. And actually it's funny because I've been asked,
19:15
here's what I get. We love when you to talk to us, we
19:19
love hearing your presentation. But then on a side conversation, I get while
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you're a pagan and they don't know, and it isn't that I'm like,
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isn't that interesting? So I want to, Like you were just saying,
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I, here's a group of women who I can go and plant seeds.
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I can go and do my work in clearing up the energy and forgiveness for
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them burning me at the stake back then, right, I there are so
19:49
many things I can do with this, with this position I'm in, and
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I'm interested now to see how this unfolds. So um so it's it's quite
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I just interesting, just keeps coming to mind. It's just so interesting,
20:12
fascinating how this has can come to light because One, I've been asking why
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am I in this organization? What's the real purpose? Two? Just have
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this conversation on Friday and this stuff come to surface. Am I Okay,
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I can I can do this. I can see this through. I can
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hang out with this and see where it goes. So my thing is,
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don't you feel like you you've so my process and my mind is thinking you,
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the contract's done. To me, the contract is done. It has
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to be up to it's this is what whatever resonates with you. But from
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my perspective, the contract's done. You have realized why you've all come together,
21:00
So that's been answered. So doesn't that doesn't necessarily mean that you have
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to still come together with this, you cave together. And also because it's
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all you have, all the stuff withinside of you anyways, you didn't really
21:10
need their template outside of you besides to show you more of what I this
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is. If I'm going to be a speaker or I'm going to be a
21:17
businesswoman, I'm not doing this. I'm not doing that. I'm not gonna
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deet, but I'm going to do this, this and this. That's it.
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That was it to me that the process has done and for me,
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my mindset and you can tell me what you think about this, but my
21:30
mindset says that. So it's completed, and now you're just working through the
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emotional part or feeling through the other stuff, because it's not you've already planned
21:38
the seats. The seats have already been planned, and now it can be
21:41
an open invitation to bring you in. Yeah, And because at this point
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you've reached the people that needed to hear you already, you already have they
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know where to find you. And if they don't know where to find you,
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they're going to find your books, or they're gonna find your whatever,
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they're gonna they're gonna gravitate towards you any ways. And it just goes to
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show you how we can be vibrating in such a vibration but keep ourselves in
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a certain vibrational frequency because we think we're trying to learn something from that.
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But knowing it was that quick, you already learned it. It's already done.
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To me, it's already a done deal. Now you're just processing.
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I was with this group of people, we had a contract, we were
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together before, and it was under bad circumstances. And you walk away powerful,
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you don't walk away burnt the steak. Do you know what I mean?
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Yea, to mean there's a whole process going on. So then why
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why hold onto the space? Because to me, that almost goes back to
22:34
like being in a relationship, of bad relationship because it's familiar and you can
22:38
gain something from it, and it's not to right. I'm not saying that
22:41
this is the reasons why, but it could be any of these reasons.
22:44
You know what I mean? It gets you, It gets you seen out
22:45
in the public eye. Here a lot of people know who you are,
22:48
but they don't know who you are, right, that's it. They don't
22:52
know who I am. Well, and on top of that, with the
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conversation that I had last week was USUM collaborating to create more connection within the
23:06
group. And so that is that is changing in my terms, m changing
23:15
the energetic vibration of how they are showing up with each other into showing up
23:22
for each other. Right, there's a difference, like we're showing up together
23:26
to UM to have you know, meet these goals for the year and do
23:32
these things for the community. That's all good and fine, but there's still
23:37
that the stuff behind the scenes, right that takes place. And this is
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this what we were talking about, the collaboration of creating more of a connection,
23:51
because when we are in connection, we're more powerful and that just goes
23:56
across the board for all women, especially UM when we get beyond the when
24:03
we get beyond them they call a personalities, those people who want to take
24:08
charge, be in charge, be in control, UM, very even women,
24:14
very egotistical in their power. UM. When we can come to us
24:21
to a space where we actually feel connected and not being controlled. So that's
24:32
UM, that's that's a big piece of this is UM to see this through,
24:37
is to help help that change the dynamics of the group and I would
24:45
love to be a part of that awesome and so I you know, on
24:51
my my own personal side is to to do that energy clearing from that lifetime
24:59
with these with these I want to say, with these women, because it
25:04
wasn't these women that were there, right, it was so but in this
25:08
group, the energy of this group and change that vibrational frequency between us and
25:15
bring in that compassion and bring in that connection. And so that's kind of
25:21
why I want to see this through because I think this is going to be
25:22
a very interesting and wonderful experience moving forward with the information that I have now
25:32
gotcha, Yeah, So I'm actually excited about that. Awesome. So so
25:41
we'll see, we'll be keep you, keep you posted. It's interesting.
25:49
But we're also in a time where a lot of shuttings going on, a
25:53
lot of stuff is coming forward from the service. That's why if we're having
25:56
these things that are you know, we can kind compare and there's a lot
26:00
of similarities. There's a lot going on in the world right now that's letting
26:04
go of stuff. There's a lot going on. Like I listened to a
26:08
certain few people and it's like the next ten days, which was started a
26:12
couple of days ago, it was going to be pretty intense. But because
26:15
a lot of darkness is coming to the light, and that means not just
26:18
globally but internally. Right it's on our own level because it's us shifting serious
26:25
stuff. We're no longer carrying it. You're no longer carrying the fear of
26:27
being seen or worried about saying something that you're not supposed to say because you're
26:32
cast someone's going to cast gudgment upon you. And then for me to be
26:34
in my space too, to recognize no one's walked in my shoes. No
26:38
one can have an understanding of what my decisions were. Even I have struggled
26:42
with some of my decisions. That's which is why a lot of it,
26:45
I think the struggle shows up outside of myself just to be kind of a
26:48
reminder that I'm dealing with that. But I'm also looking at that inner child,
26:52
you know, talking to her and knowing that she did the best that
26:55
she could in that time, because at the time I have to remember back
26:59
to some of the emotional feelings, the feelings how I felt at the time
27:02
in certain circumstances or relationships. I felt like if I would have stayed,
27:07
I would have died at that time. That's how it felt. Now I
27:11
look back at it and it's like, well, that seems stupid, But
27:12
that's because I gained new tools, so I process things so differently. So
27:17
it's seeming stupid. It's not stupid at all. It's just part of the
27:22
process. It's part of the whole letting go of all this stuff. It's
27:25
recognizing where all this stuff comes from, even whether it's this lifetime or even
27:30
younger like, but for me, I know, the territorial stuff that's to
27:33
me is that's outside of this lifetime. It's it's beyond this lifetime for me.
27:40
I just know. You just know these things. But it's working through
27:44
all the stuff. That's doing the stuff on a daily basis. It's constantly
27:47
working on yourself and catching, you know, catching how you're hearing conversations and
27:52
not judging those conversations, because that's not always easy. We've had so much
27:56
tragedy. There's been so many people. Oh my gosh, there's just been
28:00
a couple more that have passed away this just this last week, and it's
28:03
like, it's crazy. To me. It's heart attacks, it's car accidents,
28:07
it's drug overdoses. It's like all these things like all at one time.
28:11
Right, It's all this process that's going on because we have so many
28:14
people who are leaving right now, but how many are coming in. You
28:18
know, there's always a balance, there's always this great balance because this is
28:22
where we're at right now, and that we're moving forward in this space that
28:26
after this ten days, it's going to be so amazing. There's going to
28:27
be cleanup time from all the stuff that's been in darkness. But that's what
28:32
we're doing right now. Anyways, on an individual basis, so anybody out
28:36
there, but it's taken the time to really, you know, look at
28:40
yourself and ask yourself questions like why am I acting that way? We talk
28:45
about this a lot, but these are my experiences and it's it's not just
28:48
a one and done. You do it all the time. You're constantly checking
28:51
in with yourself. You're asking yourself why you feel this way? Even some
28:55
things that make you happy, it's like, well, you know, just
28:57
checking in with yourself, why why does it make you so happy? Because
29:00
we want to prolong those feelings of being in a space of joy, you
29:06
know, we want to like milk it for all you can of what Esther
29:08
Hicks is always saying, you just really want to get as much out of
29:11
it as possible. And so that's what we're doing. We're learning how to
29:15
do this and we're just helping other people to evolve if they so choose.
29:19
But also remember, because all the tragedy, tragedies and stuff around us,
29:23
I've ran into family and it's like I'm hearing about where they're going to do
29:26
this and go after this and in a full head, you know, full
29:30
steam ahead, and they're going to go after this person for everything they can.
29:33
And like hearing this kind of stuff, and all I do is stay
29:37
neutral in that space because it's not my space, it's not my place.
29:41
And before I would have taken that personal, well that's not right. You
29:44
can't. You guys can't be doing that. Or maybe I would have been
29:45
like, yeah, get them because they got to learn a lesson, but
29:49
I'm not. But I'm not part of that party anymore. I'm just on
29:52
the sidelines. And so when I hear it, I'm just how I'm asking
29:56
myself, how can I show up best for myself and this person right now
29:59
that's in front of me right, yeah, And that's um hope, So
30:06
hold on, I'm hitting buttons and being roopy. Um. That's where where
30:18
we tend to um we're relationship. Where relationships get interesting because we don't like
30:29
to see our loved ones hurt. We don't like to see our loved ones
30:33
wronged, loved ones meaning friends or family, and so we feel like it's
30:38
it's our position to that necessaries not necessarily step in and fix it, but
30:47
step in and be in that energy with that person who's in the battle,
30:53
right in the fight, the struggle when really we have we can utilize our
31:03
energy better by being on the sideline, being an observer and just sending waves
31:10
of grace, waves of love to the situation. And one of the things
31:15
I say when I'm praying for others is, you know, I put that
31:22
for the highest and greatest good for all that however this turns out, it's
31:26
for the highest and greatest good for all, and that the intention is that
31:33
we learn. I'm learning by your learning by being an observer right when we're
31:41
in it, when we're in the energy of it, the low vibration of
31:44
the anger, the fight, the struggle. When we're in that, we
31:51
have a more difficult time to see a bigger picture, to see what the
31:56
lesson is to grow to learn. Like when we're in it, we got
32:02
the blinders on and we're focused on the pain and the hurt and the anger.
32:07
So from the sidelines. I just had this conversation with a lady a
32:13
few weeks ago. She came, she asked me about a reading, and
32:19
I didn't have my cards, but I just said, okay, well just
32:21
tell me what's going on and we'll have a conversation from there. And and
32:29
she had been wronged. The person was in prison and was getting and was
32:36
ill, and so for compassion purposes, they were going to release him.
32:42
And she was, I rate pissed, and she's going to do this,
32:47
and she's going to do that, She's gonna make his life miserable. Now,
32:51
mind you, she has like a a year and a half old right,
32:58
And I said, okay, I under stand now, I'm an observer.
33:01
I'm on the sideline. I'm no attachment to this. And I said,
33:07
is it is it more important for you to utilize your time, energy
33:12
and attention to focus on that person making their life hell or utilizing that time,
33:22
energy and attention to be with your child and have joy and fun and
33:30
love and laughter in your life. And she chose making this person hell life
33:37
hell. And I'm like, that's your choice. Ye know, I don't
33:42
know that's I don't have an attachment to that. It's your choice. The
33:47
person they had the court date, she went that person was being released on
33:55
a certain day. Two days before that, he passed, and she spent
34:04
that time from the time that she found out he was going to be getting
34:07
released on compassion. From that moment she got that letter, she went into
34:15
a tailspin. She focused on him, you know, and you know you
34:21
take that that those thoughts and everything, and that that those heavy emotions with
34:27
you, and they affect your relationship with your spouse, with your child,
34:30
in your home, in your in your job, in your communities, whatever
34:37
that communities looks like, whether it's church or hanging out with your friends,
34:43
Like, you're gonna take all that with you, and even though you're with
34:47
these other people, that's where your head is, that's what you're focused on.
34:52
And that moment, those moments, those that time, you can't get
34:59
back. There's no getting that back to rewind and say, oh, I
35:04
was thinking about him and and you know what, I could have been enjoying
35:07
my daughter, and so maybe I should rewind and do it. Oh well,
35:12
you can't do that, not in our human terms. But um,
35:19
and she totally chose this person in prison, and I was like, okay,
35:24
and then, um, they need passes two days before release. You
35:34
you can also throw that person in. Shoot. I don't know if you're
35:37
from Oh you did frozen? Okay, go ahead. I didn't hear what
35:43
you said. I just said, isn't that interesting where she goes to put
35:47
her attention but to the eye for the eye, right right eye for any
35:52
mentality, it's that that thoughts and staying stuck in those areas, and it's
35:58
that just goes to tell you where that person's energy was that And then what
36:00
I was gonna say, a lot of times when we have that loss,
36:04
all of a sudden, now you don't you have You had all this fight
36:07
and anger and angst and everything inside of yourself and you're full force to go
36:10
ahead and now there's nothing, there's nothing pushing against you anymore, there's nothing.
36:15
It's just you to figure out, you suggest you to figure out your
36:20
decisions made right, and all that pain still in her yeah, it doesn't
36:25
go away. He hasn't done anything with it. But keeping the story alive,
36:30
right, that's the whole thing. It's keeping a story alive that you
36:32
don't want to keep alive. It's keeping something something, hating something so bad
36:37
that you're constantly keeping it alive. And then it takes me to the next
36:40
part where we've talked about. For when you've heard a medium, do you
36:45
know, having doing a reading with someone and they're like the person that's coming
36:50
through spirits coming through, and they're saying, I died one time and you
36:52
killed me over and over and over and over again, that you think about
36:54
me every single time this way. Yeah, I've been there, you've been
37:02
there, yea. And in that space, I will and I and I
37:07
have people around me that like, I'll throw out something else. But when
37:10
they're in the thick of things, they don't want to hear what you've got
37:13
to say. They don't want to hear it at all. And they and
37:15
if they do want to hear it, they think they do. You give
37:19
them the advice, and it's not what they wanted to hear, right,
37:21
That's not what they wanted to hear. They wanted to see they want to
37:23
see the freaking tower card and freaking death and destruction and the devil card and
37:29
all this stuff. And then you know that all this drama they want to
37:31
get, they want to go through all that cart But it's just like doing
37:35
a romance reading, right, I could pull off my cards and do a
37:37
romance reading, and a lot of times the reading was just for me and
37:40
myself. It had nothing to do with me and another relationship and a relationship
37:44
with anybody. It was a relationship. What relationship was I have? I'm
37:46
with myself. So it's like all these things, but you can't we can't
37:50
get to that healing from there. But it's part of the process still,
37:53
just like when you when you lose someone and you go through the griefing,
37:55
you go through the sadness and the grief and the anger and the you know,
38:00
the whatever someone's gonna be to blame and someone's gonna someone's gonna get it,
38:05
and the whole process. But it's that's just part of the human process.
38:07
That's what we've learned is part of the human process. It doesn't have
38:12
to continue being that human process, but that's what we know. That's what
38:15
we've learned so it's learning to it's just us when we can look at ourselves
38:21
and say, oh that inner child, are you okay, like little little
38:24
girl, are you? I mean, are you okay? Right now?
38:27
You're safe? Look around? You're safe right now? I got you,
38:30
Like, we are fine, we are having a blast. Let's go have
38:31
some thumb with this and not staying in those places. But there's no there
38:36
was no way that I could be in that space going through any of the
38:38
stuff, going through the grief of things, going through the anger of things.
38:42
Please. I was driving down the highway and I'm telling you, after
38:45
Jim pass, did anybody freaking pissed me out? I was so much anger
38:49
was on the surface. It's like I was slipping them off. I turned
38:51
on the light in my vehicle just so I could see my middle finger,
38:54
just because I was that angry. I was just angry and it had to
38:57
go somewhere. So I'm fortunately I behaved like an ass for a little while,
39:02
but an ascid for me, it was just part of my It was
39:06
part of my healing because I couldn't keep it inside of me anymore. And
39:08
that was my whole process to look at everything that I was going through and
39:10
really look at it kind of scrutinize it, wondering why why was I where
39:15
I was that right then, and realizing a lot of my grief was me.
39:19
It was it was a sadness of a you know, that loss of
39:22
the gosh, even even the loss of being able to have the wedding anniversaries,
39:25
you know, so many, so many years down the road to have
39:30
that because I just saw someone else that's celebrating their sixtieth and I thought,
39:32
holy craps, that's pretty amazing. Yeah, So it's like there's there's so
39:37
much things, but there was, but I have to remember back to how
39:42
was I feeling during that time, and not remembering back to bring it forward,
39:45
but remembering back to be like, why am I keeping myself kept as
39:50
a prisoner in this cell right now? Thinking I was such a bad and
39:52
ugly person when at the time I felt like the only way that I could
39:57
survive was I had to go because this person was going to die. I
40:00
knew that he was going to die. He wasn't he wasn't living, he
40:05
was he was already dying. The vibrate It's just like you being around certain
40:07
people at work or in this group, you just don't match with some of
40:12
them. And to be in a relationship with your with such a close relationship
40:15
with your husband and stuff. And we were like best friends forever until we
40:20
weren't right and it just we weren't just because of just different viewpoints on both
40:24
sides really, and just the energy of it all was heavy. We were
40:29
just not a vibrational frequency match at that time. Just we're not. And
40:34
I'm actually interested in because what you just said, we're not. We're just
40:40
not in vibrational frequency. But I'm also interested in is how the dynamics of
40:47
the relationships are going to change. Not that I'm going to make the over
40:54
exerted effort, but just in clearing up the energy, doing the power life
41:00
forgiveness processes and and and just still standing in my truth, in my power
41:07
of love and who I am and how I talk. And I'm just interested
41:13
to see how all that unfolds too. Is there going to be more of
41:21
a connection And if not, it's okay, I'm not it's not. There's
41:24
no judgment either way, and I'm not having any expectations of it being more
41:30
connected, you know, So just interesting the dynamics of it all and um,
41:38
and yet the idea that even when somebody, you know, when you
41:46
have such a painful experience with somebody and they do pass, they transition back
41:52
into spirit, that pain that you have doesn't go with them, like it's
42:00
still stored in you. It's still stored in your body. And because and
42:05
with that in there, if you watch a movie that pertains too. So
42:10
example, my biggest thing earlier in my days was anytime I watched a movie
42:15
where there was a mother or a father daughter connection, I would cry because
42:22
I didn't have that. And now with where I'm at and have done my
42:30
clearing and cleansing and emotional work and all the stuff, that now you watch
42:35
movies like that and they don't bother me like I'm good, Like, oh,
42:38
isn't that great? They have that connection? Or so you're still gonna
42:44
get triggered. Those pain points are still going to get triggered. You're gonna
42:49
watch a movie, you're gonna get irate, pissed, You're gonna think about
42:52
that person who wronged you. You're gonna be a witnessed to something. You're
42:57
gonna hear a conversation like it's still going to stir in your body, and
43:02
because it's stored in your body, it's still causing stressful reactions that you are
43:10
not consciously aware of. And I just had this conversation at my full moon
43:17
gathering last week and I told this particular person I had to be more abrupt
43:27
with my delivery because that's the only way she could receive it. And I
43:34
said, as long as you are thinking about that person, they have the
43:38
fucking power over you. And she did not like that. She was like,
43:44
what, Like, it's your time, energy, attention that you are
43:50
giving to that person. That person's not even here in the room, and
43:52
you're a blubbering mess and you're upset and you're angry. That person right now
43:58
has power over you in this moment and you're letting it happen. And she
44:01
was like, oh, hell no. Right, So then we started laughing
44:07
about it and kind of shifted the energy of the of the of the of
44:13
the room. And but she heard me, and I know I had to
44:20
hear that too when I was in my pain of what had happened to me,
44:23
and I was like, Yeah, they don't deserve that type, they
44:30
don't deserve taking my energy in a low vibrational state. Focused on them.
44:39
That's not okay, that's not okay with me, because now I can't get
44:43
that time back, and time is precious when you're in the physical body.
44:47
Time is precious because we don't know how long we're going to be here,
44:53
and you can't get that time back. So it is a choice. Even
45:00
though our heavy emotions like can they actually they consume us and we get crazy
45:07
in our head and we can't. It takes some effort to take a breath,
45:15
kind of move closer to the sideline so you can look inward to see
45:20
the dynamics of what's happening. That's kind of what I was doing with this
45:23
this group of women is okay, I need to just kind of pull out
45:28
and come from an observer's standpoint, What is the dynamics going on here?
45:34
Why am I being labeled this? Why are they seeing me this way?
45:38
Why is there some distance between some of the members with me or me with
45:47
them? And so becoming that observer to the situation, Now I can put
45:52
some pieces together and go, okay, I can see what's going on.
45:57
But when you're consumed by those heavy emotions, you're gonna be in it and
46:00
you're gonna feel that anger, and you're gonna feel that shame, and you're
46:04
gonna feel that the resentment. You're gonna feel all that. Well, we're
46:07
humans and we're meant to feel all that. It's what you do with it
46:14
after that. That is a choice. All of it's a choice. All
46:20
of it's a choice. You can you can push your emotions down, suck
46:23
it up, put your big girl panties on, keep facing your days,
46:28
fighting it through, you know, just keep going. Don't be vulnerable,
46:30
don't let anybody see you cry, because that's a sign that you're weak.
46:35
Don't do any of that. And and when somebody comes along, or you
46:38
watch a movie and some pushes those buttons and those emotions get welled up in
46:43
you and you're you're like, feel like you're Craig Craig because you don't know
46:47
what's going on, because you got some healing to do. You just have
46:52
healing. The emotional healing to me is so important because otherwise you're still storing
47:00
that energy in your body and it's going to come up. Guarantee, it
47:07
is going to come up at some point. But unless you don't know what,
47:10
you don't know, and you're just gonna be thinking. You know,
47:13
I'm watching this movie with this father daughter. It's making me emotional because it's
47:17
an emotional scene. No, I'm emotional because I didn't have that connection with
47:22
a father. I didn't have a healthy father relationship in my life, and
47:27
so I longed for that, and so that would make me emotional when I
47:30
recognize that, Oh, Okay, I see what's going on here. I
47:36
got some stuff to clear up with this whole father daughter dynamic in me,
47:42
in my emotions, and so so let's clear this up. But you don't
47:49
know what you don't know, and until you have some recognition of what's going
47:53
on within yourself, you can't do anything. You're just you're stagnant. You
47:58
don't know what to do, don't know how to move in a different you
48:01
know, call it pivoting in business, we call it pivot. Right,
48:05
Oh, that's not working. We need to pivot. What's the pivot?
48:08
The pivot emotional work, the pivot change your mindset. The pivot is to
48:15
have more self love, self compassion, because you gotta have the willingness to
48:21
do that. So that's my spill, that's my ramp. That nice,
48:34
but that's true, and a lot of times you don't even like some of
48:37
these people that you're talking to. It's just just a tiny little bit of
48:42
a threat that you gave them so they can sew back up something else,
48:45
you know what I mean. It's just something because sometimes we don't even realize
48:47
that we have any of these problems or we have any issues. Like we
48:52
talked about it, When you're in the thick of it, you don't notice
48:53
it so much. When someone else is going through it, you can see
48:55
all kinds of stuff, and you can tell them all kinds of things.
48:59
Yeah, and then just watch how they hold on the things still because sometimes
49:01
we're honestly ready to let go of things right and it's just going. And
49:07
that's just another way of letting you know where you're at. Yeah, And
49:10
your decisions. If you're feeling if you're feeling like if you've made a decision
49:15
and you feel like this is the right decision, how does it feel.
49:17
Because if it doesn't feel good, it probably isn't the right decision. But
49:21
how do we know until we start paying attention to that. Most of my
49:23
life earlier, it was feeling crappy, angry and bad, you know,
49:28
I mean, it wasn't and just plow through things as fast as I could.
49:32
And I don't remember a lot of childhood. So it's like, I
49:35
don't remember a lot of childhood. How present was I? That's that's something
49:37
else that's kind of hit me recently. Is it me protecting myself? Or
49:42
was I not present during that time form? So there's a lot of things
49:44
I just don't remember. Yeah, a lot me too. And maybe it
49:49
is just because it's what maybe it wasn't worth remembering, but big blanks.
49:52
But you've got other people that can remember things from freaking childbirths, Like they
49:55
can remember crazy things, and it's like, how do you That's like a
49:59
superpower to me When someone comes to tell me all that, they're like there,
50:01
they can tell you their childhood experiences as if it's happening right now.
50:06
You can fill it from them, and it's it's fun because a lot of
50:09
you know, people's childhoods can be great. Yeah, so it just wasn't
50:14
wasn't where I was at for a lot of this stuff. And that's okay.
50:16
Before I've been like, oh I'm a victim. I can't remember that
50:19
stuff. No, I just don't remember it. But for me, at
50:22
this point, it's like I didn't need it. If I need it,
50:27
it's going to come forward. If it's something for my growth or something for
50:30
that's going to be a benefit for the greater good of all, it will
50:32
show up. Otherwise it's not something that's even necessary to look at. And
50:36
also, I mean we've talked about this year is is I feel like things
50:43
come to the surface when we're in a space to be ready, to be
50:47
ready for it. Right. So, yeah, I'm with you. There's
50:55
lots of pieces in my childhood. I don't remember either, um all of
51:00
it. Most of the memories that I do have is about the pain.
51:07
So and that's okay because when I did the work on that and cleared some
51:14
of that up within myself, I became a better person. So it served
51:19
its purpose. Started Oh go ahead, No, go ahead, because I
51:23
was going to go on. And then I started asking myself questions, well,
51:27
what were the fun times? Show me the fun times? Right?
51:30
And then I started getting Then I started seeing things because otherwise I was the
51:34
same as you. I was focused on what have been done to me?
51:37
And you know, all the all these people that that UM brought contributed to
51:45
the drama and trauma Um, they all have good qualities too, absolutely so.
51:53
People. So how can you you know, do that, do that
52:00
clearing, cleansing, emotional work, whatever, and recognize the good qualities or
52:07
the good memories because all that is part of the package too. But what
52:15
we do is we let the drama and trauma over rule the good stuff.
52:24
So that's all changing. That's even changing even with you saying like what what
52:28
good did I do today? What instead of focusing on what do we think
52:32
we did wrong? Which is so silly because if you if you told me
52:35
what you thought you did wrong, and I listened to you up, You're
52:37
like, what are you talking about? Like how do you think that you
52:39
did something wrong? You know what I mean? That would be the process.
52:42
But for our for us and our beating ourselves up or having that perfectionist
52:46
idea, it just doesn't work. It doesn't fit. So I was gonna
52:53
I was gonna go back to this the dynamics with this women's group UM.
53:01
Several months ago, I did a class on past lives, and I just
53:07
remembered this actually when I was talking a while ago after we started this UM,
53:14
that in that group, one of the students was getting ready to go
53:20
to Salem to go visit because their family actually came from there. And in
53:28
this past life class, I brought up the fact that you know, I
53:37
know, I was condemned as a witch, burned at the stake and was
53:42
sharing my story, and several of the other students were recognizing or already knew
53:50
that they also had had past life as in that witch era, and as
53:55
this particular person who was getting ready to go to Salem make a trip to
54:00
Salem. She was just beside herself and she goes, what if you know
54:07
or what if you feel like you were the person who who did the burning
54:14
or did the drowning, right who who condemned these people? And I was
54:19
like, I just looked right at her and I said, I forgive you,
54:25
and who you are today is not who you are. We're then and
54:30
it and we're good, all right, bitch, bear not be burning me
54:36
this time. But I'll tell you why. But I was just like she
54:42
was just feeling that weight and that sadness and the grief, and and I
54:49
was like, we're good. So it's interesting that I had that class and
54:55
that dynamic came up. That was actually the first time I've had come up
55:00
in the class where somebody attended who felt like they were the one who did
55:05
the burning or did did the drowning and stuff. And now I'm in this
55:12
position of recognizing my dynamic with this group of women. So yeah, yeah,
55:19
and the bigger picture, the bigger picture on that whole circumstance would be,
55:22
this is what happens when fear controls a person because you're not because none
55:27
of that stuff felt good, even making a decision if they made it.
55:30
Seriously, you think about that being in that time frame, if you made
55:31
the decision, well, this person's got to go because they're which they could
55:36
kill us or they could bring whatever harm amongst us. So they're bringing her
55:39
up to take care of it. And none of it felt good. None
55:43
of it felt good. But now we're in a place where okay, well
55:45
so so you did do that, okay without lifetimes now not no longer in
55:49
our experience right now, And it's how is fear controlling your life now?
55:53
Yeah? Because fear would have been controlling that person's life then, and they
56:00
still carrying that fear or a fear with them because you look at our environment
56:04
where we're at right now, and you start hearing. I mean, it
56:07
depends on what do you want to tune into. You can turn into the
56:08
government, you can tune into the news, whatever you want. Wherever you
56:13
want to not feel good, you can go ahead and put yourself into that
56:15
place and you'll notice real quick that it's all being run as a fear based
56:20
advertising, a commodity, whatever you want to call it. It's another form
56:23
of control. But it's just seeing that from a bigger picture and then realizing
56:30
you were nothing to be afraid of. The knowledge is power, but we
56:34
weren't that back then. It wasn't topic. Knowledge was power. I mean,
56:37
you're talking about the Bible that talks about Adam and Eve and they ate
56:39
a bad apple, you know, they ate an apple from the snake,
56:42
and now they got all the you know, all this crap and they're they're
56:45
the bad they're the ones to blame for every single problem in the world.
56:47
And it's like, no, no knowledge is power. So it's just a
56:51
matter who were we under so doing something wrong, they would have considered that
56:55
not doing anything wrong. They would have not known, they would have thought
56:59
that that was the right thing to do. Right. So it's just like
57:01
a bigger picture because you just have to look at it in a grander design.
57:06
And little did they know I was going to rise again. Even for
57:12
yourself, you know what I mean. Think about going through that kind of
57:15
pain and not even knowing, not thinking that this is it and any you
57:20
may have done nothing besides gosh, I've listened to some people that they could
57:23
just hear a voice talking into their head and that meant something was wrong with
57:28
them. It doesn't. Yeah, so it's a good time to be alive.
57:34
This is fun to me. I think this is fun. This is
57:37
fun and it's funny and it's interesting and I recognize uh past life interactions with
57:49
like one on one people, yeah, number a group of people, so
57:53
this is this is interesting. Yeah. So um, I'm sure you guys
58:01
have been watching us today for this hour or watching the recording and wondering if
58:07
Bev and I called each other to arrange our wardrobe. And the fact is
58:13
no, I just wanted to hit on that because there but I thinking like
58:20
we have some kind of a team going on or something's happening, and I'm
58:23
like, no, I actually was going to wear a similar shirt, different
58:29
color. It was more of a teal color and I changed my mind and
58:34
I came with the dark this is a dark blue. And when Bev and
58:37
I got on a little before we hit the record button, she's like,
58:40
what is going on here? Why you keep dressing like me? Anyway,
58:46
we do this quite frequently. But no, we did not call each other
58:51
to arrange this coordination. Yeah, I know, it's just crazy. It's
58:57
crazy. I just wanted to share that bit of information before we left.
59:04
Awesome, all right, miss bev day final words for today. Pay attention
59:13
to your suit that you're in. It's giving you a lot of guidance.
59:17
It's very valuable. And the one thing that I heard recently is listen,
59:22
don't think, just listen and see what comes forward. Yep. And your
59:30
body, as we talk about quite frequently, is a very good indicator as
59:37
to when something feels good and when something does not feel good. And my
59:43
hope for you is that if it doesn't feel good, that you would change,
59:46
pivot, change direction, do something different of moving in the direction of
59:52
feeling good, doing things that feel good, do things that lift you up,
59:57
bring joy, bring laughter, bring love, and do more of that.
1:00:04
Ademn all right, my friends, make it a great week. We'll
1:00:07
see you next time, Bye,