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Does this 1960s case study expose modern psychology's flaws? · Honey Badger Radio

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  Hello, and welcome to HBr Talk two seventy eight. Does this nineteen sixties
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  case study expose modern psychologies flaws? And as soon as I start talking,
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  I love being asthmatic. I'm your host, Hannah Wallen here with nonsense annihilator
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  Lauren Brooks and the personification of perceptivity Mike Stevenson, and Tonight we're going to
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  examine an old video of a nineteen sixties case study on an aggressive child and
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  see if you can tell what's missing from the doctor's language. But before we
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  look at what's missing from the doctor's language, I want to point out something
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  else that's missing from the sixties. There were no video games back then that
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  you know, played at home on a regular basis, Like if you had
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  something that had a game on it, it was. There were a few
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  little devices you could get that would have a game, and a lot of
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  them were more mechanical than video oriented. Not everybody even had a TV,
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  so they couldn't even say, uh, everybody watching in horror this is This
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  is definitely not something that you can blame on video games, movies, television
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  cartoons. The kid maybe listen to rock music, but they couldn't blame it
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  on heavy metal, you know, and like you didn't get some little kids
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  listening to heavy metal in the nineteen sixties. It's so ironic that boomers used
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  to tell us to stop watching the TV, and now we're telling boomers to
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  stop watching the TV. Yeah, oh my gosh. Well, and then
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  you know, when they get old, they go to a nursing home and
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  they get plumped in front of the TV by the nurse's ads. I wonder
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  how many of them are like, no, we told our kids, this
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  is bad for your eyes. I'm going blind already, leave me alone.
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  But but yeah, so all of the things that we hear of Pete blaming
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  childhood violence on today, we're not present in this kid's life, or we're
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  not broadly present in a lot of kids lives, one or the other.
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  I think the the comic book thing it already happened where they blamed comic books
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  for juvenile delinquents. But this child is not old enough to read. He's
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  in in preschool, so or I think they call it nursery school back then.
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  So there you go, U nineteen sixties case. And I'm going to
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  get us started into the video unless you guys have anything else. To add
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  before we get started right into it. All right, let's hop right in
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  first first up, it's going to show us the child's behavior. So here
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  we go, all right, YouTube play. Seriously, he's an intelligent child
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  and a very attractive one, but Philip is a problem at school, at
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  home to himself, Philip is an overly aggressive child. What can be done?
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  We can say, oh, this is just a phase he allowed grow
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  it, or we can recognize that he needs help and that something can be
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  done to help him. This is the supervisor of his nursery's school, Miss
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  Steinberg. So the first thing I wanted to point out is if you see,
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  if you look at that, it's it's not exactly different from what you
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  would see with a child today in a preschool setting, where the teachers would
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  say, hey, this is an abnormally violent child. Right, It's clearly
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  a kid that's not getting along with his peers, and it's worth by out.
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  Though. I know the first thing you heard was he's an attractive child,
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  and I know I know that raises some red flags, but it was
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  only this many generations ago, that attractive didn't mean sexually attractive. Yeah,
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  it just as as attractive as an object like a statuette or an ornament would
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  be attractive. Yeah, it's just everything's a fucking innuendo. These days,
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  that's degenerous. He's slipping into everything. The thing is that the psychiatrist would
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  have commented on that back in the day, simply because it would be expected
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  that the other kids would respond favorably to him, because he looked just like
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  one of them. He's a perfectly attractive child. He didn't look different.
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  And today you wouldn't be able to describe him that way because people would that
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  would sounds us, you know. But but yeah, so this is this
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  is a kid that's described as a normal kid with a behavior problem who needs
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  help. What's the first thing that we hear from from these kinds of doctors
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  and psychologists aren't necessarily I don't think they necessarily have doctor behind their name,
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  but therapists and stuff when they when we hear about a child behaving violently,
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  the first thing we hear is what toxic masculinity? Right? We start hearing
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  about chemical imbalances, and we start hearing about hyperactivity and senses of entitlement.
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  But this guy's talking about, well, this kid might just need some help,
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  So we hear from the teacher, there's I think there's gonna be delay
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  every time here, really try to choke a little boy because this little boy
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  wanted to play with a little girl that he wanted, he was particularly interested
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  in. He's inclined to me, and I wanted to point that out too.
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  We are hearing about incidents of little boys in kindergarten in first grade getting
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  suspended from school for kissing a little girl. As if never before modern society
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  have little boys been attracted to little girls, or little boys focused on little
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  girls and wanted to play, you know, exclusively with that girl and not
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  have other little boys play with that girl. But this is not an abnormal
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  thing. It's not an unusual thing, and it's not it's hetro normativity and
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  it needs to stop, right and so so he's he's jealous of this,
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  he wants this little girl's attention. Poor kid checked any authority or a limit
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  set for him by the teacher, and it became so bad, even to
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  the extent of hitting that she smoking. We had to asked the mother to
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  come in to see us, and we recommended that she goes to the children's
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  hospital for hell. This is doctor Hyman Kaplin, Your mommy is worried because
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  you used to do so much fighting at school, and she liked to know.
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  It's not pausing for me, don't it. There we go, sorry
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  about that. Everything is slowed down on my computer for some reason. I
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  just restarted it like right before the show. But I just wanted to point
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  out again noticed that the teacher didn't act condemning. And yes she was smoking.
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  That's something that's changed in a general also. I mean, if they're
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  filming it, if they're filming it in a stuff room, teach us smoking
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  stuff rooms all the time. Well not anymore, they can't, not no,
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  but it was. It was only fifteen years ago when they were still
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  allowed to. So they still did. And you can imagine why because it's
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  quite a stressful job. It is. It is. Yeah, but I
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  would also remind everybody, like gen xers, we grew up watching cartoons where
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  cartoon characters would get executed at gunpoint and they would have a last cigarette before
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  they were shot, so just so you know, and boomer kids did too,
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  so this this kid being a sixties kid would sort of have been pre
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  gen X, especially if this is early sixties. But but yeah, we
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  and our parents. The television experiences we had were very different from those of
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  our children, where they edited out all that stuff and maybe put in a
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  candy bar, which is not really that much better, and completely eliminated executions
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  at gunpoint so that you don't think about that stuff as a kid. I'm
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  going to take this back a couple of seconds, so we get the introduction
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  to the doctor again. But your mommy is worried because you used to do
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  so much fighting at school, and she'd like to know how we could teach
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  you not to fight so much. Do you have any idea? Nope,
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  would you like to learn I don't want to fight? Need me spoon tie?
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  Like? Well, you think about this. You know, in a
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  lot of in a lot of cases, they don't even tell the kid what
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  they're being evaluated for today. And you know, he just straight up told
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  him, your mommy is worried. This is the problem. Notice by the
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  way that he's not just talking to the kid across the desk. The kid
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  has a bunch of toys and he's playing with them like that was the norm.
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  Yeah, yeah, but it's I think it's just if you contrast this
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  with the way kids act today, it's so completely different. I think this
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  kid just he wants a thing he wants he doesn't really know how to get
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  it, and I think is he acts out in frustration over that. This
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  is not what these kids are doing today. They are hitting teachers, throwing
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  chairs. Okay, I mean it's completely our control. You know, the
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  aggression is all towards the authority figure instead of trying to achieve or attain something
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  and just going through the emotions of the frustration of not not understanding how to
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  get it. Yeah. And in a lot of instances, what we see
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  today is instead of looking for the causes behind a child's behavioral issues, we
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  see psychiatry looking for ways to blame the child or blame normalcy in society as
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  the cause. Instead of, you know, this child has a need that's
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  not being met. It's well, this child has been exposed to too much
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  normalcy. We have to shake him out of that. Or this child is
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  too masculine, we have to make him not masculine. I mean, they'd
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  be transition transitioning this kid next week. You know, if if this was,
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  if this was any other it's just sad. If this was if this
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  was a modern psychiatrist. Before we go on, we have a relevant super
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  chat from Albert Nada retro, who says someone should tell this kid the best
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  way to get a girl's attention is to be polite, but otherwise ignore her.
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  Fred Flintstone smoked for recreation. I remember that they had smoke breaks and
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  oh my gosh, and Flintstone did a beer commercial where he and Barney were
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  bartenders. They did an actual beer commercial. But if they had they had
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  cigarette commercials as well. Yeah, yeah, they did tread and Bunny would
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  just puff it away, going you need to, but I can't remember what
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  the brand was, so it would kind of mean that good an advert.
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  But yeah, even even cartoon characters were like, we smoke and you should
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  smoke too. Yep, And it's amazing, how how how it's amazing how
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  few boomers have died from smoking. Says then, well, what's funny is
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  when boomers were little kids in in up, I think clear up into the
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  fifties, they had doctors recommending what brand of cigarettes they thought we were the
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  best. So oh and we we got a rumble comment on the on the
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  on the problem glasses. I see if I can remember how to pronounce this
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  awaken Wowie, I don't know. I'm not I'm not going to try.
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  I sorry. It's as bad as my handle on on Twitter A narrow script
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  which I looked up the pronunciation for the Greek deity and there's not a solid
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  This is absolutely the way it gets pronounced. So you really if you pronounce
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  it wrong, I can't even criticize you for it. But yeah, lmao.
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  Problem glasses. Yeah, back in the day when when they didn't have
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  like the super thin glass and you had to have they didn't have the super
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  tough frames that were bendy and everything. If you were in a position where
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  your frames might get damaged because of you know, somebody punching you in the
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  face, like if you were a psychiatrist, or if you worked in a
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  field where you were your glasses were at risked for other reasons. You had
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  what the soldiers in the military when they had to get glasses would would refer
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  to as BC glasses or birth control glasses because ain't nobody gonna fuck you if
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  you got those on so and and then that was a real thing. You
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  can't even fall asleep wearing those kind of glasses because you'll wake up with broken
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  broken glasses, yeah, or broken nose. Seriously, they were heavy.
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  My glasses, My first glasses were heavy, and I mean I was ten
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  years old when I got those things. So yeah, now that was That
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  was in the eighties, in nineteen eighty two. Not British Columbia glasses,
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  I will assure you it was definitely not British Columbia. And uh and then
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  Meredith g gave us a super chow uh the five for five dollars. It
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  says, uh, HBr talk to seventy eight honey for the Badgers. It
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  seems to me that psychology today has moved away from proper socialization of a child,
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  and that is true as well. In fact, proper socialization of a
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  child is being blamed. It was. It was one of the it was
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  one of the first industries or areas to be subject to the long and slow
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  walk through the institutions. That's a certain idea that feminism has done. Yeah,
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  Like at first they took over psychology, then they took over universities in
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  general, and then they took over schools in general, and from there it's
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  just been a cake walk to everything else. Because once you have the child,
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  you have the man, as our assault used to say, yep,
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  yep. As soon as you as soon as you're able to control the child,
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  you have control over who he becomes, and that that takes away any
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  chance that the child has really resisting until he's older and able to judge for
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  himself. And even then, you know, it imposes a fear that he
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  wouldn't necessarily have if he was raised in a better environment. So let's see
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  how our good doctor here discusses this with the kid. Remember this, this
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  kid had the chad No, I don't, I don't. I don't want
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  to stop, like we're gonna go over that again. Nope, Nope,
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  what to learn? I don't want to fight? What do you think fighting
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  is the best way to do things? Yeah? M you don't feel you
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  know any other way? Nope, this is but I smother to stop.
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  I have to respect authority from a teacher, from a maren. I feel
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  there we go. We'll go back a little bit here. So he he
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  just pointed out he doesn't know any other way but fighting. So before we
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  go on and hear what she has to say, I just want to point
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  out when a kid develops that outlook, it indicates some things because like the
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  kids I grew up with, we were largely unsupervised most of the day.
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  After a certain age, right, we'd go to the park down the street
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  from the house, and supervision was a hundred yards away from us. And
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  if we got into a fight, if somebody wasn't bleeding, the adults did
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  not stop the fight. Right. We figured out on our own that negotiation
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  is much more pleasant than getting into a fight, and like we figured that
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  out from beating each other up, deciding we didn't like beating each other up
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  and getting beaten up, and learning to make agreements with each other on what
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  we were going to do instead. And even while he's saying I don't know
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  anything other than fighting, he's playing with that I don't know what that object
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  is. I presume it's some kind of type. But you'll notice he's not
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  fighting with that object. He's not smashing against smashing it against the tabletop like
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  some kind of chip. So it's fighting. Isn't everything he does? Sometimes
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  he plays, but I guess he plays with toys. But when it comes
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  to children, yeah, I guess maybe he doesn't know anything other than fighting,
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  which makes sense because kids are assholes. And if you if you imprison
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  a child, and it is imprisonment because they're not allowed to leave. If
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  you imprisoned a child in a building with hundreds of other children, of course
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  it's going to fuck them up because children are assholes. Don't lock children in
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  effectively a prison with other children when they've done nothing wrong, because of course
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  they're going to fight them, because children are assholes that they are, and
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  they have to learn not to be assholes by encountering other assholes. So let's
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  go on to what is said next year with the other way. No,
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  this is Philip's mother. He's terribly disobedient. A child has to know and
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  have to respect authority from a teacher, from a mare. And I feel
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  some along the line I failed. He's a child that has really everything a
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  child would would wand and he's it's really quite this heart thing. There's something
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  that is just makes fun feel lack of failure. Doctors will spend time with
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  Philip, then with Philip's mother. It's more useful if so here's a mom
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  doing something that you don't see very many women do today. Do what did
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  she say? I failed? Like in one generation we've gone from women being
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  able to admit I did something wrong and my child is lacking because of it.
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  Two, you can't criticize women or it's misogyny. How misogynistic. This
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  woman would be accused of having internalized misogyny. So the psychiatrist would be looking
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  at this kid going, well, obviously this mother's internalized misogyny is affecting this
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  child. Well, I see something missing. I'm sure, I'm sure everybody
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  else. Yeah, there's something that's missing here. He probably does have a
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  dad, but he's at work. You know this is that's something else dad
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  doesn't. Dad doesn't usually go to the doctor's appointments with the kids, and
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  at that at that time, he's usually at work. So I will say,
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  if I remember right, because I've seen this video before. Later in
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  the video you do hear the dad discussed. But h and my mom is
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  the one that took my brother and meet all our doctor's appointments. And I
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  will admit that in terms of me, there were a shitload of doctor's appointments,
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  Like I might as well have just set up camp at the doctor's office
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  some years because I was there as much as I was at home. So
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  Dad wouldn't have been able to do that because he had four jobs at that
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  point he was he was a teacher, He was a yearbook advisor, and
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  a photo club advisor though so he was a club advisor and after school club
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  advisor. He had a wedding photography business that he was running, and he
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  did photography for the local newspaper, and that was that was. All three
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  of those things were related, and he probably thought of them all as one
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  job, but they were all different sets of hours that he kept doing different
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  things for different purposes. And the after school stuff was not necessarily required of
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  all all of the teachers. A lot of the teachers taught until you know,
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  three oh five, and then they went home. So so there you
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  go. Yes, the dad is absent in the video. No, that
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  doesn't mean the dad is absent in this home. But let's go on and
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  see here both parents come, since both are a part of the problem.
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  But even if only one will come, this can be altered the home situation
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  which contributes to Philip's problem. Play therapy enables the doctor to enlist and probe
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  the child's feelings, his feelings about his home, his parents, and how
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  he deals with the world about him. There's nothing magical about it and nothing
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  that is threatening to the home. If the pussycap went to school and made
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  trouble for the teachers, you'd whip the pussycat. Yeah, and what don't
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  help the pussycap learn how to do better at school? Yes, they'll remember
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  it, they'll remember it after that school. I get that doesn't make a
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  lot of sense to me, because you've had whippings and you've had punishments,
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  and has that helped to learn to enjoy school a lot better? No,
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  whem wham doesn't always help. I don't have a whip in my hands.
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  Is that what you were looking for? I just did, so you sort
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  of get to a notion. This is something that was a changing thing in
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  the nineteen sixties, in the nineteen seventies, where prior to the sixties it
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  was pretty standard. Corporal punishment was a pretty standard thing across at least across
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  the United States, and I think historically it's been a pretty standard thing.
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  Corporal punishment was expected to change behavior all the time, regardless of what the
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  behavior was, and it was it was essentially, if the behavior is severe,
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  then the punishment must be physical. And somewhere in the sixties and seventies,
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  Psycho Tristan. Psychologists began to figure out that there were other methods of
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  discipline that worked better for some kids, and then they began to like buy
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  the eighties, they were starting to figure out that actually, corporal punishment isn't
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  effective with most kids. Like there's there's very few instances where you know,
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  you might slap a kid's hand if the kid is persistently trying to stick a
• 25:27
  fork in the electrical socket and isn't old enough yet to understand the explanation,
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  that's going to bite you and it's gonna hurt really bad, and that'll the
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  kid will have a consequence, and they'll avoid that consequence. But that kind
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  of avoidance once they start getting older, that that doesn't it doesn't suffice for
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  for a lot of kids, and especially like the more intelligent the kid is,
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  the more they want an explanation, and the more they want to understand
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  what you want from them and why and what the problem is with what they
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  want before they will settle down and be like, okay, well I'll agree
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  to do what mom and dad want me to do. And then they'll also
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  try to negotiate and bargain and it's not necessarily bad, depending on what you're
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  negotiating and bargaining about. Can I stay up half an hour late tonight?
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  Well, do you have all your homework done? All right? You gotta
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  promise me you're not going to give me a hard time getting you up in
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  the morning. You can watch the television special tonight, you know, things
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  like that. But back in the day, it used to be a very
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  strict thing. And I think what we're seeing here partly is old school parenting
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  meets This kid seems to be pretty smart in that, you know, he
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  understands he's responding to an adult speaking to him like he's a kid today.
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  That an adult speaking to a kid like that, you'd expect that kid to
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  be elementary school age. But I think that kid is like maybe four or
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  five years old and will not have started elementary school yet. He's in he's
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  in a not preschool but nursery school. So he seems to be a little
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  smarter. And it may be that you know that that corporal punishment is particularly
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  useless on him. I will admit that when I was a kid, it
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  was it was pretty useless on me too, right, Like my parents had
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  to in order to get me to understand why something was bad. They had
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  to explain the consequences to me, and it was worse for me internally if
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  I realized that consequences fell on somebody else instead of on me. Well,
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  if you do this, your brother's gonna get hurt. And here's how it's
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  going to happen. Like you at this this dog free that likes you but
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  hates everybody else in the neighborhood. Because the neighbor's dog did like me and
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  hate everybody else in the neighborhood. That then your brother's gonna get bit and
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  it's it's not your dog. And if the dog gets hit by a car,
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  your neighbor is going to be sad and cry. And so I stopped
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  interfering with the neighbor's dog. But but yeah, so this this kid talking
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  about the corporal punishment thing. That's that was actually a very controversial and new
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  kind of idea in the sixties that I can sort of get close to you
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  with and love you, you love me and be friendly to you. I
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  love you because I'm a doctor that's trying to help you, and I'm trying
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  to help you. But did you see the look on the kid's face didn't
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  like it's never been told it before. Yeah, and and this is another
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  thing, like none of the adults in a child's life that are not the
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  child's parents can say that today. Maybe aunts and uncles like now, and
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  I tell all my grandson all the time, and I love him, but
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  I don't. I don't think that I've ever told any of my friends kids
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  that I love them, like I would run into a burning building to get
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  them out, you know, even now, although one of them's a Marines
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  so probably he wouldn't need me to do that, but i'd still, you
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  know, it would it would wreck me to to lose one of those kids.
• 29:48
  But I don't think I've ever said I love you to any of them,
• 29:51
  because now it's inappropriate. People look at us weird. My I like
• 29:59
  I my my friend group will say that we'll say goodbye to each other on
• 30:03
  you know, on the phone or in public and hug and everything and say
• 30:07
  love you guys, we'll see you later. And they look at us like,
• 30:08
  are you guys having some sort of a relationship. It's like, yes,
• 30:11
  it's called being really good friends. But you know, we're people that
• 30:18
  have been there for each other through thick and thin, right, and when
• 30:22
  I explain love to people, you know, I go, I go,
• 30:27
  I get biblical on everybody, And I like, well, how how is
• 30:30
  it demonstrated in you know, the the guidebook that a lot of Americans are
• 30:37
  raised with. This is how you're supposed to live, right. Love is
• 30:40
  demonstrated through personal sacrifice, through showing that you value and trust and are I
• 30:49
  have a sense of dedication to the welfare of the other person, you know,
• 30:55
  and and it can be everything from you work harder to make sure that
• 31:00
  person has what they need to. You take time away from things you were
• 31:06
  planning on doing to assist somebody with something that they need help with, or
• 31:11
  to commiserate with somebody who's been through something rough, driving you know, one
• 31:18
  hundred and fifty miles to sit with a friend because they've had something bad happen
• 31:25
  and you know, you just need to be there with them. That's that's
• 31:29
  a show of love. And becoming becoming a doctor to treat people for for
• 31:37
  illness and help them be better, help them recover and stuff. That's a
• 31:42
  show of love for humanity. And so it's not wrong for the doctor to
• 31:48
  say, of course I love you. I'm I became a doctor to help
• 31:51
  you get better. But today people are reticent to use that kind of language.
• 31:57
  They don't they don't talk about that anymore. There's probably the kind of
• 32:02
  legal ramification, you know, or maybe not legal, but professionally, you
• 32:07
  know, you don't want to give the child some sense of you know,
• 32:12
  I don't know an authority figure when you're in the role of a therapist,
• 32:17
  you know, So I could see somebody having come in and shut down on
• 32:22
  the way that a therapist would interact with a child and what they can and
• 32:27
  can't say. But man, the way this little boy's face just lit up
• 32:35
  when he said that, it was like, God, that's heart wrenching.
• 32:42
  It is almost like it was the first time anyone had ever said it to
• 32:45
  him. Yeah, you know, but but clearly it's not a message that
• 32:50
  is being given to him by people from who he would value that love and
• 33:00
  affection and acceptance from. Yeah, it really makes you makes you wonder,
• 33:07
  what's what the household dynamic really is like, because of course they're going to
• 33:12
  say whatever they're gonna say. They know there's cameras rolling, you know,
• 33:15
  that dynamic hasn't changed at all. But yeah, yeah, at the same
• 33:22
  time, at the same time, this doesn't mean that teachers can go ahead
• 33:24
  and say that love is love with regard to with regard to absolutely everything.
• 33:32
  You know what I'm getting at. It's possible to take it too far in
• 33:36
  the other direction. Yeah. Everything elimination of platonic love has gone has had
• 33:43
  all kinds of effects, and that's one of them. I don't know if
• 33:50
  that makes sense as part of what you were saying. Yeah, it's possible
• 33:52
  to love a child without wanting to fuck them. That's I just we need
• 33:57
  to find this middle ground again, this platonic love thing. Yeah. Yeah,
• 34:02
  that's that's the probably the deepest wound that has been dealt upon modern society
• 34:10
  by not not people being gay, because that that doesn't do any damage at
• 34:19
  all, but by people trying to eliminate normalcy in the name of being gay,
• 34:27
  which is not it's not necessary, and it's not for the benefit of
• 34:34
  people who are LGB all of the other letters of the alphabet. It's for
• 34:39
  the benefit of people who are communist right and and unfortunately it was very easy
• 34:45
  for them to take over the civil rights movement for people of alternative sexualities whatever
• 34:52
  you want to call it. It's created a situation where now people either have
• 34:59
  to become communist or homophobic, and that's bullshit, right, And and it
• 35:05
  has created a situation where, uh, there is no more platonic love.
• 35:09
  If you love somebody, you must want to fuck them. Well, no,
• 35:12
  that's not true. I love lots of people that I don't want to
• 35:14
  fuck, right, Uh, like, that's most of the people I love.
• 35:19
  Almost all of the people I love are are people that I don't have
• 35:23
  any sexual interest in whatsoever. So so there you go. But uh but
• 35:30
  yeah, outside of your family, you're not supposed to have that kind of
• 35:32
  love anymore. And it's it's really deadly. It's it's causing people to not
• 35:40
  be able to relate to each other. And I like Derek Workman's U LGBT
• 35:49
  kiss my ass group. So I'm gonna I'm gonna add when TV Dinner,
• 35:58
  TV Dinner master chef gave us five dollars said female preferential treatment. You interfered
• 36:01
  with a neighbor's dog and got scholl that I interfered with my neighbor's dog and
• 36:05
  got put on a register. And uh, Marin Roberic says, defined interfered.
• 36:14
  And that's a good question because what I did was I the neighbor's dog
• 36:16
  was on a leash out in the backyard, and I let the dog loose
• 36:22
  so that it could come in my yard and I could pet it. Reached
• 36:27
  over the fence because I was a tall kid, and let the just unhooked
• 36:31
  it, and the dog jumped over the fence and came over and played with
• 36:34
  me, and and then you know, ran off when it was done and
• 36:38
  didn't go back into its yard. So of course I got into trouble,
• 36:43
  so I didn't I didn't get put on a register for that. The neighbor
• 36:46
  came to my parents and said, let's let you know, we gotta do
• 36:51
  something about this. You can't keep letting the dog loose. The dog doesn't
• 36:52
  know any better than to go out into traffic, and we're getting more traffic
• 36:57
  on this street, so that's really dangerous. And I'm not going to be
• 37:00
  liable if my dog bites your son after your daughter let it loose. And
• 37:05
  my parents thought that was fair, so there we go. They had a
• 37:08
  talk with me about it. Meredith g gave us five dollars and said,
• 37:15
  oh no, wait, I already did that one. Oh I see why
• 37:17
  MC in two because there's not a done after the one. I don't know
• 37:22
  if we did this one or not. This was from HBr News two forty
• 37:25
  three. Meredith g gave us five dollars and said, well, being falsely
• 37:30
  accusedes one motivation to turn against feminism. But people can be very stupid about
• 37:35
  this stuff. Did you know the TV program that is going after brand was
• 37:37
  responsible for the regime change in Iran and Ethiopia that has contributed to millions of
• 37:43
  deaths. No one should be surprised about this hit piece. So if you
• 37:46
  want to know what that one's about, and you haven't seen this week's HBr
• 37:52
  News, now you have to go back and watch it. But in any
• 37:58
  case, going on with the video and the kid's face when he said that
• 38:01
  just killed me because I, you know, when my son was little,
• 38:07
  like I'm not necessarily an incredibly demonstrative person, but I knew that my kids
• 38:14
  would need that. I had, you know, my my two step daughters
• 38:17
  and my son, and so thinking it just wasn't enough. So I had
• 38:22
  to let them know. I had to speak how I was feeling and when
• 38:27
  I was proud of them, I had to say so and give hugs and
• 38:30
  things like that, so they knew this is how, this is what,
• 38:34
  what's what's going through mommy's head. And it became more natural for me over
• 38:38
  time. But when I first became a parent, it was like I would
• 38:44
  play with them like a little kid plays with other little kids, and and
• 38:49
  they loved that. But and I would cuddle and they loved that. But
• 38:55
  actually saying you know, you did a good job. I'm proud of you.
• 38:58
  I had to work at that, you know, just because I was
• 39:00
  thinking it didn't mean they knew right. And I wonder about this mom because
• 39:07
  of some of the things that come out later in this video, So there's
• 39:09
  a little foreshadowing there. But I I was recently my doctors looking into and
• 39:16
  is it really high functioning classic autism with me or Aspergers or something else right
• 39:25
  now? So it's it's one of those the parent can affect the kid.
• 39:32
  And I think part of the reason that my kids grew up being putting effort
• 39:37
  into understanding other people is because I put a lot of effort into teaching them
• 39:44
  that and being that for them. So oh and albertade A Restro gives us
• 39:52
  five Canadian dollars and says Lord Michael of the house of random to come driving
• 39:55
  home. The point with a sledge hamit the point out, don't hit kids
• 40:00
  with sledge hammers. A toffee hammer is fine. This this is a joke.
• 40:07
  This is not medical advice. I'm not railed off. I don't know
• 40:09
  what an actual toffee hammer is, but I when I hear toffee hammer,
• 40:14
  I think of the candy and that kind of ye is there are another kind
• 40:19
  of toffee hammer. It's a tiny little okay, no, I mean like
• 40:23
  a little hammer made out of toffee, Like, oh yeah, well that
• 40:29
  that works too. They might enjoy that, yeah, Dan, Yeah,
• 40:34
  yeah, actually yeah, well, I mean we used to beat each other
• 40:37
  with sticks when I was a kid for fun. We we've got those those
• 40:40
  dal rods that you could get at the hobby store because they were really cheap,
• 40:44
  and then we'd wrap them up in towels all except the handle towels and
• 40:49
  big heavy rubber bands and just wail on each other with them because it would
• 40:53
  It would hurt a little bit, but you didn't get a bruise from that.
• 40:55
  You didn't injure each other with it. It was just like you didn't
• 40:59
  hit hard enough to injure. And that was sword fighting. And you know,
• 41:04
  we had plastic swords too, but the plastic swords would break, so
• 41:08
  we liked the dal Rods. Plain Dane gave us five dollars and said,
• 41:14
  when I was a kid, I threw a chair slash desk. The reason
• 41:15
  for throwing the chair was that I had completed my work ahead of schedule,
• 41:20
  and she told me that she didn't want the other kids to feel left behind.
• 41:22
  Consequently, she refused to give me any additional extra credit work. This
• 41:27
  infuriated me because I despised being held back because of others. My uncle was
• 41:31
  on my side. He said, fuck that, COMI bullshit. I felt
• 41:36
  validated and still do. I was suspended for fight. You were right too,
• 41:39
  by the way, I was suspended for five days, but it made
• 41:42
  little to no difference because I caught up within two days. I'm the only
• 41:45
  one that did any work. Fuck public schools. Homeschool your kids. So
• 41:50
  I will tell you I had some similar experiences, although I didn't throw things
• 41:55
  because my teachers were very lucky. In one element, I don't get bored.
• 42:01
  It's I get I get caught up in stuff and stop paying attention to
• 42:09
  what's going on around me. But plain day and your uncle sounds like my
• 42:14
  dad. My dad would not have tolerated that for a minute. I wouldn't
• 42:16
  have been suspended because my dad would have gone in and raised Holy hell at
• 42:21
  at the school for punishing me for doing good work. And you know I
• 42:27
  would have been by the end of it. Either the teacher would have had
• 42:30
  extra work for me to do, or I would have been allowed to sit
• 42:32
  and read if I had had had that issue. And that happened with my
• 42:37
  brother in a different way. He had a teacher who had a rule that
• 42:44
  if you didn't finish your the your in class work in time, you had
• 42:50
  to stay in at recess and finish it, which was actually against school board
• 42:54
  policy at that time because back then they recognized and this is this is document,
• 43:00
  kids need playtime in between study time in order to essentially release their wiggles.
• 43:07
  Kids' brains will they'll stop focusing on schoolwork if they do not get some
• 43:15
  time to actually just go have some physical activity and do some things that are
• 43:21
  fun that an adult isn't directing. You have to do this this way,
• 43:24
  so it's not like gym class with square dancing and all that stuff. So
• 43:29
  they have to have recess in elementary school. And my brother is a very
• 43:36
  meticulous like our our family is peppered with engineers, and my brother's not an
• 43:42
  engineer. He's he's an artist. He's a photographer and a musician, but
• 43:47
  he's still very meticulous and everything that he does. So he would do his
• 43:54
  work very meticulously and then he would check it over very meticulous as before he
• 44:00
  handed it in. And as a result, the other kids were rushing through
• 44:04
  their work, they were handing in mistakes, they were not getting one hundred
• 44:07
  percent on everything they did. He was staying in at all three recesses to
• 44:12
  get all of his work done in getting one hundred percent on everything he did.
• 44:16
  And when my parents found out, they were livid, and my dad
• 44:22
  went in with the school board policy, the pages of the school board policy
• 44:28
  that said you cannot keep a kid in at recess and showed it to the
• 44:35
  teacher and said, you can't, you can't do this. This is not
• 44:37
  allowed. And the reason is, you know the explanation I just gave.
• 44:42
  And he said, what is it that you're trying to teach the students?
• 44:45
  He went over this, You know, are the other kids handing in perfect
• 44:47
  work that are getting done before him will know and he's getting perfect work done,
• 44:52
  but he's getting punished for it. Well, yes, what are you
• 44:55
  trying to teach him? Yeah? Are you trying to teach him to rush
• 45:00
  through his work and do an imperfect job in order to get a reward.
• 45:04
  And and it had never occurred to her like she wasn't doing it to be
• 45:07
  mean, this was just a method that she had been taught by another teacher
• 45:10
  and and you know, I'll do this, it works, and that was
• 45:15
  that was it. And a lot of the teachers were doing that with with
• 45:20
  the students. So uh, it's there's a lot of that kind of behavior,
• 45:25
  and especially with female teachers, they don't consider what they're teaching the kid
• 45:31
  when they punish excellence and reward like a failure to do due diligence, or
• 45:42
  when they punish like being smarter than the other kids, and and try to
• 45:46
  guilt trip you for for being ahead of the other kids. Let's see it
• 45:57
  kind of it's not really the kind of education system that we were looking for.
• 46:01
  Yeah, no, this is definitely not the kind of education system that
• 46:04
  we were looking for. And and and it's it's just crazy and Zapier,
• 46:09
  thank you for the fifty dollars. If there was something that you had intended
• 46:13
  to say, it did not come through, so you'll have to have to
• 46:16
  let us know. Uh. But but yeah, and Reggie got it right
• 46:22
  away that had excellence is bad and stop being intelligent. That's what she taught.
• 46:25
  And as soon as as soon as my dad got that across to her,
• 46:29
  she changed everything that she was doing with regard to that. She went
• 46:32
  through and a whole bunch of the kid's day changed because of that. This
• 46:38
  this wasn't a bad teacher, she just hadn't thought that through very well.
• 46:42
  And you know, back then this was this would have been again like nineteen
• 46:47
  eighty maybe nineteen eighty two, somewhere in there, you could still ask a
• 46:54
  woman to think through her logic on some on it choice that she made and
• 47:00
  not get misogyny. How dare you suggest a woman's choice not be perfect?
• 47:06
  I was just gonna say that if you could still back in those days,
• 47:12
  you could still tell a woman she was wrong and not get read to riot
• 47:15
  act by everybody around you. You know. Yeah, And as a result,
• 47:22
  by the end of the year, she was my brother's favorite teacher.
• 47:24
  So she's like, oh, she's the best teacher, and he was sad
• 47:29
  to go on to the next next year because he would have a different teacher.
• 47:36
  But let's get back to this little boy. If I can get the
• 47:43
  stupid thing to play. There we go trying to find out how I can
• 47:52
  help you enjoy your school without fighting all the etiquettes so much, because there
• 47:57
  must be a good reason why you've fight all the way. On the one
• 48:00
  hand, you say he's going to everything he wants, and then you say,
• 48:04
  somehow I feel he's missing something, And more than that, you say
• 48:07
  you feel you're the one that's making this missing occur. Well, he's missing
• 48:15
  obviously, child companionship. I mean obviously without the lack of other children,
• 48:19
  it's not a wonderfully happy home. He's such a difficult child anyway to handle.
• 48:25
  But I just couldn't take another. I want another child? Who do
• 48:30
  you think? So? Right there, he's a only kid. Now,
• 48:37
  I will point out, lots of kids grow up as only children and never
• 48:40
  become violent or badly behaved like they're they grow up. There were a lot
• 48:46
  of only kids in the neighborhood I grew up in, and you know,
• 48:52
  they would go to the park and play with the other kids. So they
• 48:54
  were only kids at home, but they still had compared inship with other kids.
• 49:01
  So I don't know's it's so crazy because I was just thinking about this,
• 49:07
  displaying how like different people's situations, Like, you know, growing up
• 49:14
  with siblings is a completely different experience than growing up as an only child.
• 49:19
  And I think some kids that I think this little boy would have benefited from
• 49:23
  having a maybe younger or older sibling, someone who he could look after,
• 49:30
  you know, and someone who if there was a bully in school beating him
• 49:35
  up, maybe he would understand that that constantly fighting is maybe not a good
• 49:38
  thing because look, my little brother got hurt, you know. Or I
• 49:43
  don't know, maybe he would have fought the other kids, but at least
• 49:46
  it would have I think maybe would have taught him a little differently. It
• 49:54
  would have taught him how to associate violence in a different way. I think
• 50:00
  having a little sister certainly teaches little boys that because the prevailing narrative is that
• 50:07
  you don't hear girls, and this is drilled into everyone from a very early
• 50:12
  age. Having a little brother, I'm not so sure the prevailing narrative among
• 50:17
  little brothers is beat the shit out of them, nobody cares and whether you
• 50:23
  whether you're a boy or a girl, kind of especially if you're a girl
• 50:27
  actually because because this guy in of centrism has as again been built into people
• 50:32
  for not just decades, but centuries. So if you're if you're a girl
• 50:37
  and you have a little brother, what's stopping you beating the shit out of
• 50:40
  them? Nothing? They're boys, after all, patriarchy something something. But
• 50:45
  even if you're a boy and you've got a little brother, I mean,
• 50:50
  it's kind of fifty fifty that maybe you'll learn to protect them or you'll just
• 50:54
  learn to see them as a punching bag. But yeah, you can't.
• 50:58
  You can't decide what gender child you have. So there's there's no advice that
• 51:01
  works for this other than don't don't teach children that you should never hit girls.
• 51:07
  But as for boys, blank, no advice. My parents were different
• 51:13
  about that. My brother and I were pretty much taught it's you guys against
• 51:19
  the world. You have each other, You'll always have each other and and
• 51:23
  nobody else outside of each other is to be trusted totally, you know,
• 51:30
  until you find somebody to marry and uh, and then you know you have
• 51:35
  each other to help you figure out if you've made a good choice. And
• 51:39
  that that's one that I know a lot of siblings are not getting. And
• 51:45
  you know, even if I hadn't had that, I will tell you this.
• 51:49
  If picture in your head, all right, little little Elliott from ET
• 51:55
  right now, and then make him kind of chibby Elliott, like a little
• 52:01
  precious moments version of Elliott from ET. All right, then make his feelings
• 52:07
  hurt and a sad look on his face, and imagine being mean to that,
• 52:15
  like you can't, you just can't. Right, That was my little
• 52:19
  brother. He was the cutest, sweetest faced little boy. Like you know,
• 52:24
  I could, I could yell at him if I wasn't looking at him,
• 52:30
  but if if he had so much as one tear in his eye,
• 52:36
  I just felt like the worst most evil how dare you pawn scum of a
• 52:44
  person? Because how could you? How could you be mean to that face?
• 52:49
  Right? And it's just little blue eyed kid with freckles over his cheeks,
• 52:52
  in his nose, and there's there's just no it was never gonna be
• 52:59
  a thing like and he would pick on me the way little siblings pick on
• 53:02
  their older siblings. You know, you you you do the repeat your sibling
• 53:07
  everything they say thing, And since I was older, I could, I
• 53:10
  could outsmart him. Once we grew up, I don't think I could outsmart
• 53:15
  my brother ever again. But when I was, you know, when I
• 53:21
  was in elementary school and he wasn't in school yet, when I was in
• 53:23
  junior high and he was still in elementary school and stuff like that, then
• 53:27
  I could. But and it gets partly because I developed intellectually on fast forward
• 53:36
  and and then finished right. But there's just no way that I could have
• 53:42
  been like a bully to him, like I couldn't have. I might have
• 53:46
  been as a toddler, but as I got older, there was just no
• 53:51
  way. And by the time I was in the first grade, I was
• 53:53
  wearing his hand me downs like kids two years younger than me. So there
• 54:00
  you go. But but in any case, yeah, we would, we
• 54:02
  would. We were kind of back to back fighters growing up. There wasn't
• 54:09
  any of this, like it really was us against the world, and I
• 54:13
  think that made us a stronger family. And we've tagged teamed a lot of
• 54:16
  stuff growing up. Even now, like out sometimes just get a feeling that
• 54:24
  I need to call and find out that you know, something's going on and
• 54:29
  he needs advice, or he'll get a feeling that I need a call and
• 54:31
  he'll find out something's going on and I need advice. You know. It's
• 54:36
  just we just are like that. And I wish everybody's family was raised that
• 54:43
  way, because it's I don't know what I would do without it, And
• 54:49
  it does suck that it's it's okay to beat up on a younger brother,
• 54:52
  but not okay with it, Like it shouldn't be okay to beat up on
• 54:55
  a younger brother. All kids should be raised with the understanding, you know,
• 55:00
  it's you guys against the world, right, and and you you have
• 55:06
  each other first, and everybody else that comes along until you meet the person
• 55:12
  that you're going to be partnered with for the rest of your life. Everyone
• 55:15
  else that comes along is just a friend in comparison. And you know,
• 55:20
  so you you have each other first, you have each other's backs. But
• 55:24
  yeah, I depending on when you grew up, West wolver says, Et
• 55:30
  was not that great of a movie. It for the time, it was
• 55:34
  an amazing movie. It might seem cheesy by today's standards, but but for
• 55:40
  the time period, yeah, it was. It was quite an amazing movie.
• 55:46
  So it's gen X nostalgia there you have to you have to understand and
• 55:54
  and I'm sure like baby boomers have nostalgia for a whole different set of movies
• 55:59
  and a whole different set of uh standards in movies. And then I would
• 56:06
  say the same thing about millennials what they would consider to be a great movie,
• 56:13
  like probably so they don't get into either of our generations movies except maybe
• 56:17
  Goonies. So there you go. I watched Goonies on the on the on
• 56:24
  the plane to the US or back from the US recently, and just just
• 56:30
  because I haven't seen it for twenty five years, I remember every scene.
• 56:35
  Yeah, everything, there's a single moment of that film that isn't burned in
• 56:38
  my brain. Fucking classic. Yeah. They wouldn't even make that movie today.
• 56:45
  They wouldn't. There's there's a few problematic things in that movie that they
• 56:50
  just wouldn't do today, all right, but but they did back then.
• 56:55
  Let's take a look at Let's see if I can get it to please happy
• 57:05
  Hope. He's such a difficult child anyway to handle. But I just couldn't
• 57:10
  take another another child. Who do you think is the most important person in
• 57:15
  his life. What say I am your say so I'm matching? Though,
• 57:23
  well, I would agree with that. Now, children don't learn things by
• 57:30
  being born with a machinery for anying things. No, they have to be
• 57:36
  trained and developed. A good teacher, A good mother is a person who
• 57:39
  gives good ease, love and affection and tenderness and gratification, but who,
• 57:46
  in crucial situations can say, no, how good a teacher are you?
• 57:52
  Particularly when your child doesn't want to listen to you. He gets punished,
• 57:57
  and that's so there is to it. And then you become a punitive teacher
• 58:00
  because he's very rude. He goes to bed, and he's punished, and
• 58:04
  it doesn't matter to him if he doesn't watch the television. He just goes
• 58:07
  overmind me with a flipper and he goes to his room. Doesn't always work
• 58:12
  well after you've given him a beating. Do you feel I just want to?
• 58:15
  I want to. I want to hit that one line again here?
• 58:19
  Wait ah, I just I just went way back. Let's see where were
• 58:23
  we here? Yeah? You raise when I raise my voice to him,
• 58:36
  voice back, My husband isn't. Let's see if I can get back to
• 58:44
  it. There we go. I also want to point out. Look at
• 58:49
  the expression on her face. Well, she's very guarded. She look how
• 58:57
  guarded she is? Right, she won't. She's not looking directly at the
• 59:02
  at the doctor. She's not facing things head on, and she's giving the
• 59:09
  answers that she thinks are correct. And let's see if he such a patients
• 59:19
  can say, no, how good a teacher are you? So we're going
• 59:23
  to get bad and he's punished and it doesn't matter to him if he doesn't
• 59:30
  watch the television. He just goes, oh, my knee with a flipper
• 59:32
  and he goes to his room. It doesn't always work well after you've given
• 59:37
  him a beating. So that's the line, after you've given him a beating.
• 59:42
  When I was a kid, we would hear that term and it was
• 59:45
  it was. It was not used to mean what I would have thought of
• 59:50
  as a beating on a regular basis. Kids would kids say, oh,
• 59:53
  you got a beating? What was described the beating? I was hit in
• 59:58
  the butt once with a paddle, like, that's not a beating. I've
• 1:00:01
  been to the park down the street from my house and taken a beating.
• 1:00:05
  That's that's not a beating. You got spanked, right, and so kids
• 1:00:08
  in my neighborhood were very careful to differentiate because there were kids that had beatings
• 1:00:15
  in my neighborhood. There were kids whose parents didn't just hit them in the
• 1:00:20
  butt with a paddle. There were kids whose parents would hit them with a
• 1:00:23
  belt. There were kids whose parents would hit them in the face, like
• 1:00:29
  slap them across the face, kids that would come to school with bruises for
• 1:00:34
  severe behavior. And it was still considered the norm that if your behavior was
• 1:00:40
  over the top, that and over the top punishment would happen. And when
• 1:00:46
  I was a kid, one day child Protective Services came and talked to us
• 1:00:50
  in school about the difference between a spanking and a beating, and a lot
• 1:00:58
  of kids at home with this idea they could talk to their parents and say,
• 1:01:05
  you can't do this anymore because Child Protective Services said so. And a
• 1:01:08
  lot of parents told their kids, you know what happens if you call them
• 1:01:13
  you don't live here anymore, They will come get you and they will take
• 1:01:16
  you and they will put you with other parents in another house, and that's
• 1:01:20
  where you'll stay. And nobody called. Nobody wanted to go live somewhere else,
• 1:01:28
  so not to say that it's not abusive to beat your kids, because
• 1:01:37
  I think it is. But it's not useful to teach the children that they
• 1:01:45
  should call CPS under that circumstance, because the parents that are going to get
• 1:01:52
  called on are likely to tell them something like that, And unless things are
• 1:01:55
  so bad that the child is afraid to stay at home, they're not a
• 1:02:00
  call, just so you know. But yeah, it was pretty normal back
• 1:02:05
  then to refer to any kind of discipline Like she says, she puts the
• 1:02:09
  child over her knee and hits him in the butt with her slipper, which
• 1:02:15
  I imagine they were much thirty year slippers back then, because I just can't
• 1:02:19
  imagine that being and like my friends and I hit each other with things that
• 1:02:24
  were a lot worse than that, but but yeah, I imagine there were
• 1:02:30
  more like little shoes in this. So it would be like getting paddled with
• 1:02:35
  a paddle, and that was referred to as a beating. And there's a
• 1:02:42
  reason wait till your father gets home is so much more effective than just a
• 1:02:49
  paddling with a slipper because it puts it puts the fear of death into a
• 1:02:54
  child. Even though when the father gets home and the mother goes to it.
• 1:03:04
  He very often takes the child into another room and goes Your mother's upset
• 1:03:07
  with you. We have to do something to appease your mother. So let's
• 1:03:14
  just act like we did and then it's over with. But it was the
• 1:03:17
  fear itself, perhaps the fear for several hours while they wait for the father
• 1:03:24
  to get home. It's the fear itself that does it. And maybe that's
• 1:03:29
  not ideal either, because using fear to teach a child is you know,
• 1:03:35
  is not ideal either, But it's a lot better than actual violence, because
• 1:03:38
  that is what teaches a child that violence is is how we solve these issues.
• 1:03:47
  And you know, to a child, well, I get spanked in
• 1:03:51
  the ass with a slipper means I have to do some kind of cruel into
• 1:03:55
  another child who doesn't do who crosses me in some way, and they don't
• 1:04:01
  have access to a slipper. All they have is their fists. So the
• 1:04:05
  light I'll do the closest equivalent I can think of of spanking this other child
• 1:04:12
  with my did we lose your Mike? Oh? I think I think we
• 1:04:21
  lost Mike there for a minute. And this is this is where you know,
• 1:04:27
  like personally. I was a difficult child, not because of any kind
• 1:04:30
  of behavioral disorder, but because it was very difficult to use standard punishments on
• 1:04:35
  me. And my brother was the same way in some ways, like he
• 1:04:39
  had such a high pain tolerance. You know, spanking him wasn't going to
• 1:04:43
  be very effective like you could. You really would have had to be abusive
• 1:04:48
  to him to make spanking effective, and my parents were not going to do
• 1:04:53
  that. A lot of one of the common things that was done in the
• 1:04:57
  seventies and eighties when we were kids was grounding. That didn't I don't think
• 1:05:01
  that existed, when maybe it did, because didn't leave it to Beaver get
• 1:05:08
  grounded sometimes, yeah, the little boy. But I just like my parents
• 1:05:14
  didn't do that, and it wouldn't have worked on me because I would have
• 1:05:18
  just sat in my room and read all my books. And they were teachers,
• 1:05:21
  so they were not going to say you cannot read your books. Yeah,
• 1:05:25
  And they could have said, well, instead of reading your entertaining books,
• 1:05:29
  you're going to read school books or the dictionary or the encyclopedia. But
• 1:05:35
  I was already doing that because I was a nerd. So having a child
• 1:05:41
  that doesn't get bored a significant portion of the punishments that were people came up
• 1:05:47
  with during like the late sixties, early seventies and eighties that were not corporal
• 1:05:54
  punishment used boredom as as a punishment. So you couldn't You couldn't punish me
• 1:06:00
  with boredom because it couldn't be inflicted. You could put me in a room
• 1:06:05
  with just wallpaper, and I would come out of there and tell you how
• 1:06:11
  many of whatever pattern on the wallpaper there was, or tell you where all
• 1:06:15
  the faces were in the wallpaper, you know, like and how far you
• 1:06:20
  had to stand away to see the faces, you know, just whatever,
• 1:06:25
  you know. I like, I could do the paradolia thing. Or I
• 1:06:29
  would come out and I would have in my head a whole story written,
• 1:06:32
  possibly about the wallpaper. Still like that didn't do anything. So and my
• 1:06:40
  brother like, it was the opposite with him in terms of like if you
• 1:06:45
  grounded him, it deprived him of something that was as fundamental to his existence
• 1:06:50
  as air and nutrition. You had to let him go outside, You had
• 1:06:56
  to have him, let him socialize with his friends. So it would have
• 1:06:59
  been in it have been like a real beating, not just paddling a child,
• 1:07:03
  but a real, honest to goodness bruise, leaving beating to ground him.
• 1:07:09
  So they couldn't do that to either of us. So we had we
• 1:07:13
  had. You know, this is this is what has you know happened.
• 1:07:15
  This is this is the consequences that you inflicted. Now it's your job to
• 1:07:20
  do your best to mitigate those consequences. So if if the consequences cost somebody
• 1:07:27
  money, we did chores. Mom and dad quote unquote paid us for the
• 1:07:31
  chores at minimum wage until we had earned enough to pay back what we cost
• 1:07:38
  somebody. And you break somebody's stuff, you you do chores to pay for
• 1:07:42
  it, and then you go out with mom and dad and you spend that
• 1:07:45
  money and replace the item, you know, and things like that. And
• 1:07:51
  that was a lot of what we did growing up, was recognizing consequences for
• 1:07:57
  behaviors and doing the labor or sacrifices of time and effort and things to to
• 1:08:05
  mitigate those consequences. Like and if you misused an item, the item was
• 1:08:12
  taken away until you learn to use it properly. That was that was basically
• 1:08:16
  it. But but yeah, but boredom didn't have any effect on me.
• 1:08:23
  Yeah, Like I said, the most effective punishment for a child, if
• 1:08:28
  it works, is you've pissed people off. Yeah, and to some degree
• 1:08:32
  that works on most normal children because because they do understand that sort of thing
• 1:08:42
  as the simplest of of of consequences, Like people, people are going to
• 1:08:47
  give you the evil lie if you do this obviously, like like you're saying,
• 1:08:53
  if if that doesn't work, and for a lot of children it doesn't,
• 1:08:56
  then you need to go to removing something that that they would normally rely
• 1:09:04
  on for their everyday enjoyment. So it's like I say, it's not so
• 1:09:09
  much fear as as as as deprivation of a luxury because because people give their
• 1:09:15
  children luxuries, given whatever luxuries they can afford. So yeah, the first
• 1:09:23
  step if you've raised a healthy child is just this, this this simple emotional
• 1:09:30
  spike of you're in the doghouse right now, and if that doesn't work,
• 1:09:34
  then you take away something that they don't need but they do enjoy. And
• 1:09:39
  only if that doesn't work do you resort to physical punishment. And if you've
• 1:09:46
  if you've done everything right, and if your child really doesn't have something wrong
• 1:09:51
  with their brain, then then all of that should work before you ever have
• 1:09:57
  to resort to physical punishment now, and and really you ought to consult some
• 1:10:02
  kind of child psychologists before you even resort to that, because because what this
• 1:10:10
  whole video we're talking about, perhaps and is the case with some children.
• 1:10:15
  Some children are like some dogs. Some of them are like any animal.
• 1:10:19
  Some of them are just assholes. So some of them just have too much
• 1:10:25
  energy, and and they don't and they don't know how to express that energy.
• 1:10:29
  And yeah, I should stop talking because I'm not a parent. Well
• 1:10:33
  i am, and I'll put it this way. If your kid is old
• 1:10:38
  enough to understand and answer complex questions like how do you think that it felt
• 1:10:45
  for Johnny when you bit him on the arm? And picture Johnny's experience of
• 1:10:51
  being bitten and imagine that Johnny had pain and answer you, well, it
• 1:10:59
  probably hurt john And be aware of that. You are past the point where
• 1:11:04
  you should need to be spanking the child like that. At that age,
• 1:11:10
  you can get the child to understand how much is Johnny gonna like you if
• 1:11:14
  you bite him? And would you like Johnny very much if he bit you?
• 1:11:19
  And once you lead the child through that discussion, you can get them
• 1:11:24
  to understand, you know, well, I want Johnny to like me,
• 1:11:28
  maybe we'll figure out some other way to negotiate who gets to have a turn
• 1:11:33
  next with this this toy or this game or whatever, and you know,
• 1:11:40
  or whatever else they were arguing over. And but when the child is prior
• 1:11:46
  to that age where you can you can explain consequences and stuff like that,
• 1:11:51
  there will be behaviors that your kid does that are a threat to his or
• 1:11:56
  her life, like trying to run out in front of traffic, or trying
• 1:11:59
  to stay got fork in an electrical outlet, or trying to break through the
• 1:12:02
  little lock you have on the cupboards to get into where the bleach and stuff
• 1:12:06
  is that you don't want the child taking a taste of. And then if
• 1:12:12
  the child persists and just doesn't understand and can't understand why mommy and daddy don't
• 1:12:17
  want them in that cupboard, then slapping a wrist or my my dad used
• 1:12:23
  to have this thing. It doesn't injure, it doesn't hurt, it's not
• 1:12:27
  painful, it's just very fucking annoying. And he would he would just one,
• 1:12:31
  you know how, you're like flick a booker off your fingers, except
• 1:12:35
  he'd landed on your lip, Like right, under your nose, like right
• 1:12:39
  in that little cupid's bow part. And that was if you were being whiny,
• 1:12:46
  like for no reason, nothing's going on. You've you've said, you've
• 1:12:50
  been told no for something, and you're doing them kind of behavior that that
• 1:12:59
  sort of shocks the kid out of the behavior and you get this little and
• 1:13:02
  then you look at dad and Dad's like, don't do that. And that
• 1:13:06
  was the end of that. There was no no suffering from it, no
• 1:13:10
  nothing. And you know, you get the communication. Crying means that something's
• 1:13:15
  wrong, so you know, or that you're sad about something and you need
• 1:13:19
  my help. And if you do that when you don't need my help,
• 1:13:23
  then I won't know when you need my help, right, And that's not
• 1:13:27
  something that they do just with boys like I got that. I still remember
• 1:13:30
  that. I remember a lot of things that happened when I was little that
• 1:13:32
  I remember that just because I was like, don't do that. Well,
• 1:13:36
  I'm gonna do that every time you wine. You know, you can tell
• 1:13:40
  me when something's wrong, but don't you sit there and wine. And that
• 1:13:45
  was that was the communication. So if something was wrong, you know,
• 1:13:48
  then I had to say I'm really not happy about this you know or whatever.
• 1:13:55
  Parents don't seem to do that with their kids. They treat their kids
• 1:13:58
  as little accessories that they're just towing along with them in their lives. Like
• 1:14:01
  your child is your student. Your focus as a parent, your main focus
• 1:14:08
  as a parent is your child, and and everything else comes second. That's
• 1:14:13
  why you have children, is to give somebody a new life and a chance
• 1:14:20
  at at the best life they can have. And it's your focus to give
• 1:14:26
  them every tool that you have in your toolbox to achieve that. But but
• 1:14:33
  yeah, and yeah, Reggie will point has pointed out if you're in the
• 1:14:39
  wrong state, the strength calls CPS. That's true. Unfortunately, if especially
• 1:14:45
  if the child says anything about discipline, or if the psychiatrist thinks the child
• 1:14:53
  is the wrong sex for their body. So let's see going on here,
• 1:15:02
  maybe play. Do you feel he's learning something? No? Do you feel
• 1:15:08
  you've learned something? No? No. I well, I am inclined to
• 1:15:15
  be what highly strung said, believe, but I try desperately to handle the
• 1:15:23
  situation of calmly as one can. You mean you don't think you should be
• 1:15:28
  so he just said, after the child's had a beating, do you feel
• 1:15:30
  the child learned something? She says, no, do you feel you've learned
• 1:15:33
  something? No? And and he asks about her anger, and she admits
• 1:15:39
  to being high strung, which most women today will also not do high strung,
• 1:15:45
  but just just to just to put that, get that point across.
• 1:15:49
  And you can see now now she has an expression on her face right,
• 1:15:54
  that is frustration, that is desperation. She's unhappy about the way it works.
• 1:16:02
  We have a super chow. You shall read, Oh, you shall
• 1:16:05
  read. Gave me five dollars and said you shall read all of Nietzsche's words
• 1:16:11
  and explain what it all means as your punishment. That would have been that
• 1:16:15
  would have been detrimental to the whole world to have me read NIZZI when I
• 1:16:19
  was a little impressionable little kid. If I was that impressionable, I mean
• 1:16:26
  I become a super punished Adults have a hard time reading Nietzsche kids kid.
• 1:16:35
  I got. I got a little bit morose after reading Lovecraft for crying out
• 1:16:41
  loud, and that was fiction. Do you feel you've learned something? No?
• 1:16:49
  No, I would agree, are you when all this happens? Well,
• 1:16:53
  I am inclined to be what highly strong say the least I try so
• 1:17:00
  yes, to handle your situation as calmly as one can. You mean,
• 1:17:04
  you don't think you should be angry, I shouldn't show my anger? Why
• 1:17:10
  not? Well, it seems to me though, that because he follows your
• 1:17:15
  example. Well, also trying very hard not to teach him, because when
• 1:17:20
  you're angry, you're entitled be angry. If you're putting a lid on that
• 1:17:26
  is it also possible that you're curving a lot of belove you might give him,
• 1:17:30
  because if one learns to put a lid on feelings, it's very hard
• 1:17:33
  to open up the lids for feeling A, but close it for feeling B.
• 1:17:40
  But the thing is, I find that when you raise when I raise
• 1:17:43
  my voice to him, he raises his voice back, my husband, So
• 1:17:47
  I want to pause there. So what what he just explained here is if
• 1:17:54
  and and she's sort of got this curious judge kind of look on her face
• 1:18:00
  here, But he's explaining that if she doesn't let the child know she's angry
• 1:18:08
  when she's angry, he doesn't learn how to handle anger. He doesn't even
• 1:18:15
  know that it's angry. It just learns that you use violence as retribution,
• 1:18:19
  even if you're not angry, which is far more sinister than the idea of
• 1:18:25
  an angry child. Lots of children get angry all the time. Lots of
• 1:18:28
  people are angry all the time, but they don't resort to violence. Teaching
• 1:18:31
  a child that you resort to violence even if you're not apparently angry, is
• 1:18:36
  so dangerous because that's that's that's why so many children become become these hideous bullies,
• 1:18:45
  because even when they're not angry, they're just like, well, I
• 1:18:47
  just use violence to get what I want, and then I'll laugh about it.
• 1:18:51
  Yep. And I remember this one time when I was a kid.
• 1:18:57
  I don't remember what it was that I did, but I remember the lecture
• 1:19:01
  and I remember the moment where it turned from a lecture to my dad and
• 1:19:08
  me laughing, and it was it was it was funny because I have that
• 1:19:14
  mind that turns everything into images, right when you describe something to me.
• 1:19:17
  So my dad had just got done telling me all of the potential consequences that
• 1:19:23
  could have happened for what the risk that I had taken. I had done
• 1:19:26
  something stupid like jump out of the We had a clubhouse that was we called
• 1:19:30
  it a tree house, but there was no tree. It was on a
• 1:19:32
  post and it was like ten feet off the ground, so it was a
• 1:19:35
  ten foot jump. It wasn't like a It was dangerous for a kid,
• 1:19:40
  but not super dangerous because kids are more flexible. And had a fireman's pole
• 1:19:47
  because the guy that owned the house before us bought the garage door and the
• 1:19:51
  fire pole from the firehouse when they replaced it, and he put the firepole
• 1:19:56
  in the clubhouse and he put the garage door on his garage and then discovered
• 1:20:00
  that it was too heavy for anything but an industrial garage door opener. But
• 1:20:03
  in any case, so I had done something like that and or maybe climbed
• 1:20:08
  on top, you know. And Dad was talking about you could have gotten
• 1:20:11
  hurt really badly. You could have broken your neck, you could have been
• 1:20:13
  paralyzed this, that, that, and he was really mad, and I
• 1:20:15
  could tell he was really mad. And he's like, and he said,
• 1:20:19
  the reason I'm so mad is because you could have gotten hurt and that would
• 1:20:24
  break my heart. And he goes, if I ever see you do anything
• 1:20:28
  like that again, I'm gonna kick your butt up between your shoulder blades.
• 1:20:30
  And then he stopped because the next line of that is you're gonna have done
• 1:20:32
  button your shirt to take a ship. And it was the kind of thing
• 1:20:35
  you would yell at another guy in a bar, not at your kid.
• 1:20:39
  And I got this mental image, complete with the beript sound effect, of
• 1:20:45
  a dad kicking a cartoon girl's butt and it goes up between her shoulder blades
• 1:20:49
  and her legs are really, really long, and she's got these big cartoon
• 1:20:53
  eyes. And I got this look on my face and I was trying really
• 1:20:58
  hard not to laugh, and I could see my dad realized. I could
• 1:21:01
  see on his face that he was realizing that I was picturing what he just
• 1:21:05
  said, and that made him picture it, and he started laughing, and
• 1:21:11
  then I knew it was okay to laugh. And he's like, you understand
• 1:21:15
  why I'm mad at you, right, And I'm like, yes, and
• 1:21:19
  I won't do it again. But that was funny. He was like,
• 1:21:23
  never say that to anybody. Don't yell at it anybody, because it's not
• 1:21:27
  a nice thing to say. But I couldn't help laughing at it, you
• 1:21:31
  know. And that was the way we were with the discipline. Once I
• 1:21:34
  got the point and I understood, but he didn't hide the fact that he
• 1:21:39
  was mad. He did show me that he was controlling it, and you
• 1:21:44
  know that he wasn't he wasn't going to hit me, and he explained why
• 1:21:47
  he was mad, and that was how you like. This lady has just
• 1:21:53
  admitted that she hides her anger from the child, so the child gets the
• 1:21:57
  punishment but doesn't understand. Mom is angry because he's done something that is detrimental
• 1:22:04
  to his welfare and his relationships with other people, and and she she's punishing
• 1:22:13
  because of that. And yeah, that's that's how you create a sociopath.
• 1:22:17
  But I have to say, as sinister as this woman appears, with her
• 1:22:23
  lack of emotion, is still so much less sinister than modern day mothers,
• 1:22:28
  who will explain all the same crap with a shit eating grin on their face.
• 1:22:31
  Yeah no, I don't get angry. I never experienced anything bad.
• 1:22:39
  I'm entirely a good person. I need to discipline my child anyway. Yeah,
• 1:22:48
  yeah, go ahead, all the bullshit, For all the bullshit you
• 1:22:54
  can say about fifties and sixties mothers and how they were emotionally repressed. You
• 1:23:00
  haven't fixed this by by fixing a smile to your face while you say exactly
• 1:23:05
  the same shit, and the same goes for the teachers. Yeah, who
• 1:23:10
  fixed these smiles to their faces while they say lupron is completely reversible, completely
• 1:23:17
  fine. Yeah, if butter wouldn't melt in your mouth, you're probably lying.
• 1:23:25
  M everybody. Everybody probably hasn't heard that expression. Butter wouldn't melt in
• 1:23:29
  my mouth is the type of smile where you have the big white grin and
• 1:23:33
  it's completely fake. It's the one that if you're in a beauty pageant,
• 1:23:39
  you know, like women in beauty pageants will put vasoline on their teeth because
• 1:23:45
  it's really uncomfortable to put your lips over your teeth if you have vasoline on
• 1:23:48
  your teeth, and so they put the vasoline on their teeth and then then
• 1:23:53
  they will go out there with this big jackline or and smile like and and
• 1:23:58
  it looks like you're actually being tortured in my opinion, but uh, but
• 1:24:03
  it's but it's a real looking you know, as long as you can crinkle
• 1:24:06
  your eyes and everything. Yeah, it's almost the herald the Pain smile,
• 1:24:10
  except it looks like a real smile and it's creepier because of that. Albert
• 1:24:15
  eddar Retro gave us two dollars Canadian and said she looks to be in need
• 1:24:18
  of a cunning linguist. Yeah, she she does kind of look a little
• 1:24:24
  bitch, she has it. That's the thing about the the emotionally repressed women
• 1:24:29
  of the sixties, and that there were some It was the idea that you
• 1:24:33
  were supposed to be serious all the time, right and and and yeah,
• 1:24:39
  warp reflection, you got it right. It was usually used for little girls
• 1:24:42
  that look all and act all sweet and innocent, but they're little bitches,
• 1:24:45
  right. They have this nice, big smile and they have this cute,
• 1:24:48
  little, sweet innocent look on their face, but they say the most horrible
• 1:24:51
  things to you. And I knew kids like that, and mostly girls.
• 1:24:58
  But yeah, this idea of women are supposed to hide their emotions and not
• 1:25:03
  to to keep people guessing. Right, You keep the upper hand by keep
• 1:25:06
  people keeping people guessing. And there's a degree to which that does work if
• 1:25:12
  you are going to use people's wrong guesses against them. Yeah, it's it's
• 1:25:17
  very passive, aggressive and old school. Loo is that a typo? And
• 1:25:33
  it says I got forehead vaginal cream, but they read it wrong. Come
• 1:25:38
  back, you read it wrong. To figure out the same rules like what
• 1:25:44
  that has to be a typo? Please tell me that's typo. I don't.
• 1:25:50
  Yeah, but but forehead. Nobody has a vagina on their forehead.
• 1:25:57
  Like, Okay, I'm confused. You have to explain that. I'm going
• 1:26:01
  to go in with the video here. But yeah, this this lack of
• 1:26:04
  expression, you can still see like she's analyzing the doctor as much as he's
• 1:26:10
  analyzing her. And I think she is trying to think and consider everything the
• 1:26:15
  doctor's saying. And there's a very Being female makes you do a thing that
• 1:26:25
  I think men either have more control over than women or don't do, where
• 1:26:32
  you hear criticism through a filter of everybody having told you that your image is
• 1:26:39
  more important than your impact on the world. And I've watched this happen with
• 1:26:44
  girls around me and to a degree felt it myself. It's I've had an
• 1:26:48
  easier time with it because my parents focus on discipline when I was growing up,
• 1:26:54
  was getting my impact on the world across to me because they really couldn't,
• 1:26:58
  like I said, they couldn't really punish me by spanking me very well,
• 1:27:01
  and they couldn't punish me by boredom because I don't get bored. So
• 1:27:08
  that was what was left. You have to have a sense of responsibility for
• 1:27:13
  the consequences of your actions on the people around you and on yourself. But
• 1:27:18
  a lot of girls grow up with you know, it's what will other people
• 1:27:23
  think of you? If you do this? What will other people think of
• 1:27:27
  you? If you act like this, if you look like this, if
• 1:27:31
  you are like this, how will they judge you? How will you be
• 1:27:35
  judged? And so growing up they develop this filter that all criticism comes through.
• 1:27:46
  I'm judging you harshly, and you have this sense of I'm not that
• 1:27:51
  bad to resist it, and it sounds offensive at first before you actually get
• 1:28:00
  to analyze what's been said to you. It would be easier for you to
• 1:28:05
  raise this child if you do these things. No, I'm not saying you're
• 1:28:11
  a bad mother. I'm saying that you need these tools instead of those tools
• 1:28:15
  to do this job. And you've missed this tool, and if you start
• 1:28:19
  using this tool, you'll have a happier household. That's not you're bad,
• 1:28:26
  but you hear it as you're bad because you're female. And I think a
• 1:28:30
  lot of guys because they're raised almost entirely with respect to their impact on the
• 1:28:38
  world as opposed to like your image is created by your impact on the world,
• 1:28:46
  like as opposed to, your image comes first and your impact doesn't matter.
• 1:28:50
  Right, So they maybe don't have the same experience. If they do
• 1:28:57
  have the same experience, they're better at hand handling it than women are.
• 1:29:00
  And I can see her trying to handle that experience in this facial expression.
• 1:29:09
  I don't know, does that make sense, Lauren? Yeah, No,
• 1:29:12
  it does it? Does it? What I get from her face is like
• 1:29:17
  she she just looks like someone who has been worn down by the day to
• 1:29:23
  day dealings with this child that she feels that she can't control, right.
• 1:29:28
  She she feels like she's at her wits end. She feels like she's done
• 1:29:31
  everything that she can to try to take control of this situation, but it's
• 1:29:35
  not working. And so, you know, how is anyone else going to
• 1:29:41
  come in and tell her what she should be doing differently? You know what
• 1:29:45
  I mean? How can how can whatever she's and have for this this many
• 1:29:50
  years been wrong and someone else is going to tell me how to do it
• 1:29:54
  better? And you know, but it takes discipline, you know what I
• 1:29:59
  mean. It takes one accepting message that maybe the things that you're doing is
• 1:30:05
  wrong and or not as effective in the way that you would like, you
• 1:30:12
  know, to get the results that you want out of this child. And
• 1:30:15
  she's just looking very skeptical at this doctor, like all right, And I
• 1:30:19
  would think from this gesture right here, I think anything that he tells her,
• 1:30:27
  she might listen to it, but I don't think she would actually fully
• 1:30:30
  apply it day by day. It's like training a dog, you know what
• 1:30:34
  I mean. You have to follow through. It's not just well, I'm
• 1:30:39
  going to try it this one time and if it doesn't work, well,
• 1:30:42
  then it doesn't work and it's rubbish and just forget. I'm just gonna go
• 1:30:45
  back to what I know, which is just spanking this kid until it doesn't
• 1:30:49
  work anymore, which she's already at that point and she's admitted it, you
• 1:30:56
  know. But if you if you can't consistent, you know, and I
• 1:31:03
  hate to say it, like train your child, but that's what it is.
• 1:31:08
  It's a lot like it's a lot like your child is an apprentice adult.
• 1:31:13
  Yeah, yeah, and you have it's it's it's a job that it's
• 1:31:21
  something that you have to want to do. And that's why, you know,
• 1:31:26
  I understand a little bit, you know, because I'm hesitant to do
• 1:31:30
  that because again, you don't she probably had every hope and dream in the
• 1:31:35
  world for this lovely little baby that came into her life and it just didn't
• 1:31:42
  turn out the way that she expected, and now she's upset about it.
• 1:31:46
  You know that that's not an unnatural feeling. But you have to be able
• 1:31:54
  to, uh, you know, accept other people. You have to be
• 1:31:58
  able to take other people's inions and and at other advice on board. Otherwise
• 1:32:05
  you're just gonna remain frustrated, you know. And I that that's what I'm
• 1:32:11
  getting from her face right here. She just seems like she's just so downtrodden.
• 1:32:16
  And well, maybe not so much, because you know, at least
• 1:32:20
  she's still trying. You know, she recognizes that there's something that needs to
• 1:32:25
  be done, but I just don't think that she has a clue about how
• 1:32:30
  to get it, how to do it. I'm gonna I'm gonna point out
• 1:32:34
  one other thing. There are two ways to go, two directions to go
• 1:32:40
  with makeup in terms of your how you're it affects your features. You can
• 1:32:46
  exaggerate or harden your features, or you can soften your features and I will
• 1:32:51
  point out if you look, because this is she's I think she's in the
• 1:32:55
  middle of a blink. Here her eyes being a half masted, you can
• 1:33:00
  see heavy eyeliner, and her eyebrows are darkened. And aside, like she
• 1:33:04
  doesn't have dark lipstick, but she's kind of hardened her features with her makeup,
• 1:33:11
  and that is that is something that I usually see with people who are
• 1:33:14
  authoritarian, Like women who are authoritarian will harden their makeup if they wear makeup.
• 1:33:21
  Just a point, Mike, you were gonna say something, I'm gonna
• 1:33:28
  say. She doesn't seem frustrated to me. Maybe maybe this is because things
• 1:33:32
  are different now than they were in the sixties, But I mean, you
• 1:33:40
  can picture of frustrated expression. It involves wide eyes and perhaps some kind of
• 1:33:45
  twitchy demeanor. This this seems like someone who whatever emotional conditions she has now,
• 1:33:56
  she had before she had children. I think it's more to do with
• 1:34:00
  how she was raised than how she's raising her child. And again I get
• 1:34:06
  maybe there's something I'm missing about the way people had to raise children back in
• 1:34:14
  the day before we had so many distractions with which to children. But this
• 1:34:24
  the expression we're looking at, and the only expression we've seen is a cold
• 1:34:29
  one. It's barely any expression at all. It seems like someone she seems
• 1:34:34
  like she thought she knew how to raise a child before she even went into
• 1:34:39
  it. And again this is this is all speculation, and you know,
• 1:34:45
  I don't take my word for anything, but it seems like someone someone who
• 1:34:48
  thought it would be easy to raise a child and she still thinks it's easy.
• 1:34:54
  Yeah, And there's another aspect to this to to keep in mind.
• 1:34:59
  They are they have agreed to be on camera, and they are in front
• 1:35:04
  of psychiatrists. And there is a thing that people do when they go to
• 1:35:11
  speak to a psychiatrist or any any I guess service helper that they feel is
• 1:35:20
  going to judge them, like if you're going to speak to people at Job
• 1:35:27
  and Family And this is if you get what's it called. It's Assistance for
• 1:35:40
  Pregnant Mothers. Specifically, it's called Women Infants Children WICK. If you get
• 1:35:47
  enrolled in a program called WICK through Job and Family Services, they make you
• 1:35:51
  take parenting classes through Job and Family Services. And if you go in and
• 1:35:59
  just apply for Medicaid when you're pregnant, they browbeat you into also applying for
• 1:36:04
  food stamps and wick because they just assume that you need those things too,
• 1:36:09
  and if you're not applying for them, it's because you're too proud. And
• 1:36:12
  so when when I was pregnant, and at the time that I was pregnant,
• 1:36:19
  I was disabled by a back injury, I went in and applied for
• 1:36:24
  Medicaid. And then they once you apply, once you go in and talk
• 1:36:28
  to him about it, like if you don't follow through, they start threatening
• 1:36:32
  with child protective Services while you're not getting what you need. We may have
• 1:36:36
  to see if we got to take that baby away from you. So I
• 1:36:40
  just went ahead through with everything they wanted me to do. And you know,
• 1:36:45
  as soon as I got a job, I'm like, all right,
• 1:36:48
  I have a job now I don't need you guys anymore. But I went
• 1:36:53
  to the parenting classes and one of the things I noticed was the fakeness.
• 1:36:59
  There was a performance being done by every parent in the room, Like you
• 1:37:04
  perform I'm a good parent for the people who are judging whether or not you're
• 1:37:10
  going to be a good parent. And when you go to a psychiatrist,
• 1:37:14
  you perform if you don't if you're not going there to get diagnosed, you
• 1:37:16
  know, like I have a problem, and I need help with this problem,
• 1:37:19
  and I think I have a mental health condition, and I'm here to
• 1:37:24
  get diagnosed for this. You know, what is my mental health condition?
• 1:37:28
  Help me doctor, give me some drugs, you know, or whatever.
• 1:37:30
  And that's what's going on today a lot, right. But if you're in
• 1:37:33
  there with a family member and you're trying to get the family member diagnosed,
• 1:37:41
  you perform I'm a normal family member as part of a normal family in a
• 1:37:47
  normal household, and the only person in the family that has something wrong with
• 1:37:51
  them is the person that we've brought in for help. And well, this
• 1:37:57
  mother isn't going quite that far where she's she's willing to say that she thinks
• 1:38:00
  being the most important person in the kid's life, she's part of the problem.
• 1:38:04
  And she doesn't understand what she's not doing right, what the child is
• 1:38:09
  missing and not getting from her. She's still trying to perform. I'm I'm
• 1:38:15
  not there's nothing wrong with me, right, And so you're you're going to
• 1:38:19
  see her masking. And what I'm seeing with her behavior here is if I
• 1:38:27
  keep my face as neutral as possible, I won't betray any normalcy that you
• 1:38:34
  can focus on and you'll have to treat the child. We have two rumble
• 1:38:43
  rents and a super chow and a super chat here. I'm going to read
• 1:38:47
  all of them, and then I don't think we're gonna do any farther with
• 1:38:50
  a video tonight. I think this will I'm going to call the show here.
• 1:38:57
  Albert Nady Retro gave his five dollars Kenny and said, boycott expendables four.
• 1:39:01
  They replaced Terry Crews with fifty cent even though he harassed Crews overcoming forward
• 1:39:06
  about a sexual assault. I haven't seen any of the expendables actually, now
• 1:39:13
  that I think about it, but so it's hard for me to do it.
• 1:39:16
  But now you guys are aware of it. If you want to jump
• 1:39:20
  on the boycott, there's the information. Playing Dane gave his five dollars and
• 1:39:27
  a Superchow and said I have more stories that are kind of similar, and
• 1:39:30
  they pissed me off to this day. The teacher assigned us a task to
• 1:39:33
  drawn color and animal with color pencils. Since I grew up reading manga and
• 1:39:38
  comic books, I had some experience with drawing and characters in manga and comics,
• 1:39:42
  and I was pretty decent at it. Don't get me wrong. I
• 1:39:45
  wasn't a Salvador Dolly, but I was better than average. Anyways, I
• 1:39:48
  drew a tiger and the teacher walks up to me, takes a look at
• 1:39:50
  my drawing and says it looks ugly. What the hell? I was shocked
• 1:39:57
  and stopped drawing. She walked away, and I looked at the other kids
• 1:40:00
  drawings. They looked like shit in comparison to mine. This happened in first
• 1:40:03
  grade, and I think this was my first experience with gas lighting. I
• 1:40:09
  took my drawing and showed it to other students and teachers, and they all
• 1:40:13
  said it looked good. The other instance that still pisses me off happened during
• 1:40:18
  my freshman year in high school. I got into trouble because my all female
• 1:40:23
  science groupmates decided to mix all the chemicals in one beaker, resulting in the
• 1:40:27
  chemistry teacher yelling at me and accusing me of trying to make a bomb with
• 1:40:30
  soap, bleach and lime juice. Oh geez, how were they that unsupervised
• 1:40:36
  to begin with? My chemistry teacher never would let that happen, but I
• 1:40:42
  will say he was always very present in the classroom. I was just reading
• 1:40:48
  the instructions, I looked at her and asked, what the fuck is wrong
• 1:40:54
  with by the way I threw the chair in sixth grade, whenever I hear
• 1:40:59
  boys fall behind in school, I'm reminded of these experiences I had. Yeah,
• 1:41:04
  it sounds to me like your chemistry teacher was not as present as my
• 1:41:10
  chemistry teacher. But my chemistry teacher was very meticulous and also put the fear
• 1:41:16
  of God into us about messing with the chemicals in a class because some things
• 1:41:20
  when you mix them create, you know, like invisible poisonous gas, and
• 1:41:29
  we didn't want to kill ourselves. But at the same time, my lab
• 1:41:35
  partners, my lab partners blew up a Pyrex beaker by we were supposed to
• 1:41:44
  have a a iron skillet or some sort of cookware that we were doing the
• 1:41:53
  make peanut brittle experiment, and they blew that up and it ruined everybody's because
• 1:42:00
  the girl that was supposed to bring the pan didn't bring the pan. And
• 1:42:03
  it was bad because I almost brought one, thinking, you know, maybe
• 1:42:08
  what if she forgets, and and then I didn't because I was afraid if
• 1:42:14
  I brought one and she didn't forget, she would take it the wrong way,
• 1:42:18
  and I should have, because we ended up making it in that beaker,
• 1:42:24
  and I kept saying, you can't, you gotta take take it off
• 1:42:27
  the heat, take it off the heat. Something's something's wrong. It's making
• 1:42:30
  crackling noises. And the next thing, it just literally exploded. And you
• 1:42:35
  know, we had glass in our faces. I had stepped back and I
• 1:42:40
  still got glass in my face. It was bad. It was not a
• 1:42:43
  good experience. And it was hot too, so I'm lucky I don't have
• 1:42:46
  scars on my face from that. And then we had to pay for the
• 1:42:51
  beaker. And those things are more experienced or expensive than you would think me.
• 1:42:57
  Yes, yes, And it was are you have set? And it's
• 1:43:00
  set exactly that? But yeah, like and that one he allowed sort of
• 1:43:08
  because he was he was dealing with somebody else, but he had told us
• 1:43:14
  he had all three of us have been told you have to to put it
• 1:43:18
  back and forth on the heat or not do the experiment. You know this
• 1:43:20
  is and and he gave us a chance, and and we screwed it up.
• 1:43:25
  So so there you go. Let's see, we got the hard to
• 1:43:33
  pronounce name, which and what we gave us a dollar and said, got
• 1:43:38
  it. Women with sharp eyebrows our Karen's yeah to to like the nth degree.
• 1:43:44
  Most of the time when I run into women who have their eyebrows like
• 1:43:46
  really really tailored and darkened, or like the ones that shave their eyebrows off
• 1:43:55
  and draw it in with a pencil. Now, this doesn't cover women whose
• 1:44:00
  eyebrows don't grow in very well, Like if you see peach fuzz and she's
• 1:44:03
  darkened it, it's because she looks like she doesn't have any eyebrows if she
• 1:44:08
  doesn't do that. But I've seen women shave their eyebrows off and you can
• 1:44:13
  see this double sometimes too, and then draw them back on. And women
• 1:44:16
  who have perfectly normal, perfectly good eyebrows and then they put eyeliner in them
• 1:44:21
  to darken them and it looks like they've got you know, mustaches over their
• 1:44:27
  eyes, and they do they seem to like if they make themselves look more
• 1:44:31
  harsh they are. And then you have Noba Fan twenty one gave us a
• 1:44:39
  dollar and said, if you haven't done a show on it already, could
• 1:44:42
  you go into more detail about women being judged for their appearance unlike men for
• 1:44:46
  their impact. We have talked about this before, and we'll probably talk about
• 1:44:50
  it more in the future, but I do think I want to do more
• 1:44:55
  of a show about it. And it's not just women being judged for their
• 1:44:58
  appearance. It's women being told that is their mark on the world, because
• 1:45:05
  that's the shallowest mark. It doesn't even last your whole life, right,
• 1:45:11
  Yeah, men are also judged on their appearance. Yeah, but they're not
• 1:45:15
  only judged on their appearance unlike women. That's the that's that's the real difference.
• 1:45:21
  And in a lot of ways, men are judged on how their appearance
• 1:45:24
  might interfere with them making their mark on the world, where women they're judged
• 1:45:30
  on like I won't want to say judged on necessarily so much as encouraged to
• 1:45:38
  focus more on their appearance in the world than their mark on the world,
• 1:45:43
  if that makes sense. And yeah, it might be a future talk.
• 1:45:50
  I think that's everything, did I Yeah, I read the expendables thing.
• 1:45:57
  So that's those all right, And that is the last of our super chats
• 1:46:02
  and super chows. So we will remember we're at five fifty three, we're
• 1:46:08
  like just before six minutes into this, So this might be a few shows
• 1:46:13
  and we might break from it. In the middle, there is an article
• 1:46:16
  on on emotional labor in the workplace that at some point I want to go
• 1:46:25
  over with with Prim, but we'll have to figure out when she can be
• 1:46:30
  on and and then if we need to interrupt this, we'll interrupt it.
• 1:46:38
  And if we can't interrupt it, then we'll do this all the way through
• 1:46:41
  and then do the article that other article with Prim. So that's sort of
• 1:46:45
  what's coming up in the next few shows. So you'll have to We'll leave
• 1:46:49
  this as a as a cliff cliffhanger, and you'll have to tune in next
• 1:46:54
  week to find out more about the angry eyebrow lady and her kid and how
• 1:47:00
  psychiatry handles an aggressive child in the sixties as opposed to today. And I
• 1:47:04
  want to point out there is something that has not been mentioned here in the
• 1:47:08
  first six minutes of this video. We have not heard the phrase toxic masculinity.
• 1:47:14
  There is a reason for that. That phrase did not exist in psychiatry
• 1:47:19
  at that time. So with that, do you guys have anything else you
• 1:47:25
  want to add before we jump out. I'm going to be in America two
• 1:47:30
  days from now. He be there, folks. Well, I'm already in
• 1:47:35
  America. Well you better be, yeah, except but as Ohio. Yeah,
• 1:47:45
  I know, I know, well, especially like I don't have time
• 1:47:47
  to travel. You're you're the only badger whose house I haven't been to.
• 1:47:53
  I guess there's not much space for my fat ass. And there's not space
• 1:47:58
  for my fat ass in my house right now. Guys don't understand, like
• 1:48:01
  it literally looks like a hoarderhouse in my apartment right now, because we still
• 1:48:04
  have all my parents stuff in here. That and it's not like I didn't
• 1:48:08
  bring home a bunch of nick knacks and shit. My parents were local photographers.
• 1:48:14
  They ran a business of photography business. They were newspaper photographers. They
• 1:48:21
  were sports photographers for the newspaper, but they were also news photographers for the
• 1:48:26
  newspaper. So and we had already started bringing this stuff to me. I
• 1:48:31
  have a plan on what to do with this, like a couple of years
• 1:48:36
  prior to their deaths, that I've started amassing their work, fifty years of
• 1:48:45
  my family's work, and that includes black and white negatives, color negatives.
• 1:48:54
  There are some larger format negatives, not very many. A lot of prints
• 1:49:00
  there are old school, not old old school, not the five and half
• 1:49:08
  inch, but the small hard shelled floppy disks of you know, the both
• 1:49:15
  sizes, the seven fifties and the one fours. There's uh uh some drives.
• 1:49:25
  There's like there's a few of the old IBM micro drives. I don't
• 1:49:31
  know if anybody remembers those. There's some hard drives. There's CDs, DVDs.
• 1:49:39
  I've left something out zip discs, which I don't even know if I'll
• 1:49:45
  be able to get into them, because they're old, and those things had
• 1:49:46
  a tendency to just like corrupt for no fucking reason. I hated those things.
• 1:49:53
  And so like I've got a room full of media from five different counties,
• 1:50:02
  plus weddings from all over the Tri state area to digitize and put into
• 1:50:09
  a collection. And and then I have got some family heirlooms. So like
• 1:50:15
  there's a there's a lot of stuff here right now. Nobody's coming over to
• 1:50:18
  my place. Sorry, Like my what was my son's room before he grew
• 1:50:24
  up and moved out is currently it looks like a storage area. It's completely
• 1:50:29
  full. It's like somebody's attic right now. And then there's stuff out like
• 1:50:31
  the living room it has barely walking space through it. And we've been tidying
• 1:50:38
  up and putting things away and and organizing things and everything. But this is
• 1:50:41
  this is going to be like a long term project. God forbid, we
• 1:50:45
  have to move in the next five years because it's it's and then there's stuff
• 1:50:50
  in in storage too. So yeah, so I would I would actually have
• 1:50:59
  to avel and visit somebody like like that. That's basically and you know,
• 1:51:04
  that's what would have to happen for me to hang out with you guys,
• 1:51:08
  And that's just the way it is. And I probably maybe later this year
• 1:51:15
  now that like I'm doing the very last thing. I hope this Friday,
• 1:51:19
  I have a thing to sign and like the house has been sold. Everything
• 1:51:24
  that was still in the house went with the house. I am hopefully done
• 1:51:30
  dealing with the my parents insolvent estate after their death and can move on from
• 1:51:36
  that. And that means I'll be able to hopefully maybe do a mixed up
• 1:51:42
  meet up sometime later this year. But I'll keep you guys updated if that's
• 1:51:47
  going to happen. And until then, I'm just gonna be antisocial for you
• 1:51:55
  know, like normal and but with that, welcome to the Internet. We're
• 1:52:00
  all anti social scept the guys their uncle social Oh you you know, I
• 1:52:09
  had to. And with that, we'll go ahead and call it. I
• 1:52:13
  will talk to you guys next week. Thanks everybody for listening. Thanks to
• 1:52:18
  my two co hosts. This is this is kind of a weird subject matter,
• 1:52:23
  but I think we're we're doing pretty good with it. And uh,
• 1:52:26
  thanks to everybody who works in the background and make HBr talk happen. Good
• 1:52:30
  Night, Dool.