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Growth Spurt: Rewrite the Pattern · The Growth Project

• 0:02
  You.
• 0:03
  welcome back to another Growth Spurt episode. My name is Doctor Gabby. Caveat is and today I'm going to be talking to you about why failure feels like a pattern. Have you ever had a stretch where it feels like nothing goes your way and suddenly it starts to feel like a pattern? Maybe it's been six months of just feeling like the underdog.
• 0:28
  Like things just never work out for you. Whether that be in your career, your relationships. It could be systemic, even
• 0:37
  when people experience these repeated setbacks, the brain starts building a narrative.
• 0:43
  Psychologists call this learned helplessness,
• 0:45
  where after enough negative outcomes, the brain stops asking, what can I do differently? Or what can I change? And starts assuming that this is just how things go for me?
• 0:56
  Things just never pan out for me. And in most cases, the real issue isn't failure itself, it's that interpretation. High performers view setbacks as data points as information to learn and grow from.
• 1:11
  Struggling performers see them as identity statements. They then mean that you are a failure, that you are not good enough. It's the same event, but a very different meaning and interpretation.
• 1:24
  So what do we do with this? Well, when you feel stuck in a cycle of failure, ask these three questions. One what specifically didn't work?
• 1:34
  What about my process led to failure or an unsuccessful outcome? Second, what part of this is actually controllable? What part of my process do I have influence over? Do I have control over? And third, what would one small adjustment
• 1:53
  look like next time?
• 1:55
  And I think that the key here is narrowing in on one adjustment rather than trying to overhaul your entire process.
• 2:03
  Progress returns when you stop asking, why does this happen to me? And start asking, what can I change?
• 2:13
  So I challenge you to start asking that question when you experience setbacks or failures and see how it changes your narrative.
• 2:22
  Look forward to seeing you all on the next episode. Thank you for your time.