Latest / QUESTION EVERYTHING / Go First: Gabby Reece on Courage, Self-Trust, and Living Without Regret

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Go First: Gabby Reece on Courage, Self-Trust, and Living Without Regret · QUESTION EVERYTHING

0:03
Speaker 1: No one has all the answers, but when we ask
0:05
Speaker 1: the right questions, we get a little closer, closer to truths,
0:11
Speaker 1: closer to each other, even closer to ourselves. I'm journalist
0:16
Speaker 1: Danielle Robe and each week, my guests and I'd come
0:19
Speaker 1: together to challenge the status quo and our own ways
0:22
Speaker 1: of thinking by daring to ask what if, why not?
0:28
Speaker 2: And who says?
0:30
Speaker 1: So? Come curious, dig deep, and join the conversation. It's
0:35
Speaker 1: time to question everything. Years ago, I was in Chicago
0:41
Speaker 1: hosting a morning show. I had two other co hosts,
0:44
Speaker 1: Felicia and Jordan, and the three of us would sound
0:47
Speaker 1: off on topics in the morning, like at six in
0:50
Speaker 1: the morning. It was very much like the View. And
0:52
Speaker 1: then one day we started talking about beauty pageants. And
0:56
Speaker 1: if you've been listening for a while, you know that
0:58
Speaker 1: most of the time soft and sweet, but when I
1:02
Speaker 1: have an opinion, I can be kind of blunt, especially
1:06
Speaker 1: when I feel strongly about something. And that day I
1:08
Speaker 1: had a strong opinion. A goddamn soliloquy flew out of
1:12
Speaker 1: my mouth. I said, the most beautiful women you've ever
1:15
Speaker 1: encountered would be total losers in a traditional beauty pageant.
1:19
Speaker 1: And that's because authentic messy, transcendent beauty can't be scored.
1:24
Speaker 1: It isn't plucked or tamed, or planned or rehearsed, and
1:28
Speaker 1: people like the owners of the Miss USA pageant are
1:31
Speaker 1: clearly not the purveyors of it. Real beauty is about resilience,
1:35
Speaker 1: girls and women who have been through something and come
1:38
Speaker 1: out the other side with an idiosyncratic scar or a
1:41
Speaker 1: hard earned wrinkle, like the first lines of a powerful story.
1:46
Speaker 1: If there were a beauty pageant where girls were asked,
1:48
Speaker 1: when did you really get lost? And how did you
1:51
Speaker 1: find your way back to yourself? Well, then I might
1:54
Speaker 1: go all in for that. And that was back in
1:57
Speaker 1: twenty seventeen. I was twenty six years old, And even
1:59
Speaker 1: then I knew that real beauty was in the wrinkles
2:03
Speaker 1: and the scars and the stories, the living of life,
2:08
Speaker 1: from showing up again and again with grace and guts
2:11
Speaker 1: and curiosity.
2:12
Speaker 2: And there's such beauty.
2:14
Speaker 1: In women who have lived, women who have listened, who've
2:18
Speaker 1: learned how to walk with their power without stomping. You know,
2:23
Speaker 1: Gabby Reese is one of those women. It first came
2:29
Speaker 1: by Gabby's work in a surprising way. I can't tell
2:32
Speaker 1: you it was from watching her play professional volleyball being
2:35
Speaker 1: one of the greatest, or even because she was Nike's
2:37
Speaker 1: first female signature athlete or the first woman to design
2:41
Speaker 1: a Nike shoe.
2:42
Speaker 2: I met Gabby.
2:43
Speaker 1: Reese in the pages of a book Tools of Titans
2:46
Speaker 1: by Tim Ferris. It's a collection of interviews and ideas
2:49
Speaker 1: from some of the most impactful people in the world
2:52
Speaker 1: that he's interviewed, and on Gabby's page, there was a
2:54
Speaker 1: philosophy I'd never heard before.
2:57
Speaker 2: She named it, go First.
3:00
Speaker 1: The idea is this, have you ever been in one
3:02
Speaker 1: of those moments where everyone's waiting for someone else to
3:04
Speaker 1: make the first move, to say hi, to smile, to
3:08
Speaker 1: start a conversation. Gabby Reese says, go first. Be the
3:13
Speaker 1: first to be kind, the first to say hello, the
3:16
Speaker 1: first to open your heart or ask the question. She
3:20
Speaker 1: actually likens it to a superpower. She says it creates
3:22
Speaker 1: openness and possibility and connection.
3:26
Speaker 2: So I tried it. I started going first in.
3:29
Speaker 1: My own life and especially in la where no one
3:31
Speaker 1: wants to smile first.
3:33
Speaker 2: I used this.
3:34
Speaker 1: One tiny shift, and when I tell you, the world
3:37
Speaker 1: around me lit up. It worked like it actually worked
3:41
Speaker 1: It's rare that you read about a life hack, try
3:43
Speaker 1: it and it actually changes the way you move throughout
3:45
Speaker 1: the world. But this one did, and I never forgot it.
3:50
Speaker 1: So when I finally got the chance to sit down
3:52
Speaker 1: with Gabby, I knew she'd be insightful.
3:54
Speaker 2: But I didn't know just how deep she would go.
3:57
Speaker 1: Gabby's fifty five in human years, but I think she's
4:01
Speaker 1: at least nine, five hundred and forty seven.
4:03
Speaker 2: In karmic wisdom years.
4:05
Speaker 1: She holds the kind of hard earned life experience that
4:07
Speaker 1: only comes from doing the work, from being in the
4:10
Speaker 1: arena again and again and still showing up with softness
4:14
Speaker 1: and clarity and curiosity. So today, Gabby doesn't just give
4:18
Speaker 1: us a step by step guide for a perfect life.
4:21
Speaker 2: She's not selling easy answers. What she does offer is rare.
4:25
Speaker 1: It's a candid look at what it means to live
4:27
Speaker 1: with intention, to take everything you've been through and let
4:31
Speaker 1: it shape the way you move forward. She speaks from
4:33
Speaker 1: the kind of experience that only comes from actually living it,
4:36
Speaker 1: raising three daughters, building businesses, navigating a long marriage, and
4:41
Speaker 1: making space for her own ambition along the way. So
4:44
Speaker 1: I invite you to listen closely today, closer than usual,
4:48
Speaker 1: and not just for advice, but for resonance, for the
4:51
Speaker 1: moments that make you sit up a little straighter, the
4:54
Speaker 1: moments that remind you who you are and who you're
4:57
Speaker 1: still becoming. I think the question that we're circling today
5:00
Speaker 1: is one that we all wrestle with. How can we
5:03
Speaker 1: live by design and not by default? It's time to
5:07
Speaker 1: question everything with Gabby Reese. Okay, so Gabby, your daughter
5:15
Speaker 1: told you to stop talking with your TV personality.
5:18
Speaker 3: You know, I did a lot of TV interview athletes,
5:21
Speaker 3: and even within that I was I would say more myself.
5:24
Speaker 3: But I think as a female, as somebody who's my
5:27
Speaker 3: natural personality is maybe direct, I find myself also being like, okay,
5:33
Speaker 3: the message is more important, So how do we cater
5:37
Speaker 3: to the message. So let's say, for example, if we're
5:39
Speaker 3: trying to encourage people like, hey, take care of yourself
5:41
Speaker 3: or whatever that is, and one of my daughters, my
5:44
Speaker 3: middle we would shoot and she goes, Yet, in this
5:47
Speaker 3: new world, in this new medium, don't talk with that
5:50
Speaker 3: side of yourself. Just say it. And I think I oftentimes,
5:53
Speaker 3: especially because let's say social media are certain things, there's
5:56
Speaker 3: not a lot of nuance, and I don't like to
5:59
Speaker 3: get caught with my skirt up. I don't want to
6:02
Speaker 3: get into a big hassle, and so one I used
6:05
Speaker 3: it as a way to focus on the message too,
6:07
Speaker 3: was a way to avoid getting into a bunch of
6:08
Speaker 3: hooplaw that I don't really want to. I tried to
6:11
Speaker 3: pick my battles, you know. But then the other side
6:14
Speaker 3: of that is sometimes and I especially, I was talking
6:17
Speaker 3: to a friend of mine who's a high powered businesswoman.
6:19
Speaker 3: She's in her fifties, and she goes, yeah, and I
6:23
Speaker 3: call it the fe fifties.
6:24
Speaker 1: So I do a separate podcast with Hello Sunshine, and
6:28
Speaker 1: we only interview women, and all of the women in
6:30
Speaker 1: their fifties call it the fu fifties.
6:32
Speaker 3: Now it's a thing, and I'm smack in the middle
6:35
Speaker 3: of my fifties. So I think I've been saying f
6:37
Speaker 3: you for a really long time. I just haven't said
6:39
Speaker 3: it here because I sort of feel like everybody has
6:42
Speaker 3: a role and a purpose, and I think it's also
6:45
Speaker 3: knowing who you are and what you're selling, what your
6:48
Speaker 3: message is, and part of my message is really meant
6:52
Speaker 3: to be more positive, because that's how I feel. That's
6:55
Speaker 3: what I want to show up for but within that
6:58
Speaker 3: I could probably be a little harsher and a little
7:02
Speaker 3: more direct, because at this point it's like, hey, we're
7:04
Speaker 3: running out of time. I'm running out of time, right.
7:07
Speaker 2: Do you feel that way?
7:08
Speaker 3: Well, it's just life, and this is the time in
7:11
Speaker 3: life to try to put all of the lessons to
7:13
Speaker 3: the best of your ability in play. And we live
7:16
Speaker 3: in a world where people, you know, everything needs to
7:18
Speaker 3: be fair, and that's just not how life is, that's
7:21
Speaker 3: not how nature is. And so I think you can
7:23
Speaker 3: be loving.
7:24
Speaker 1: And I'm curious to know what some of those were
7:27
Speaker 1: for you personally.
7:29
Speaker 3: I think it's about designing your life, so your relationships,
7:35
Speaker 3: your career, your physical self in a way that really
7:40
Speaker 3: is true to you, in the way that you can sustain.
7:42
Speaker 3: So if that's the kind of overarching umbrella goal, then
7:47
Speaker 3: I always say, how do you back everything you do
7:50
Speaker 3: into that to reflect that back so that in ten
7:53
Speaker 3: years I also will be at a place that hopefully
7:57
Speaker 3: I designed that I want instead of life pulled me around,
8:00
Speaker 3: because it does work. Pulls you around, kids, pull you
8:03
Speaker 3: around if you're in a partnership, and then you arrive
8:05
Speaker 3: at a place and you go wait a second, This
8:08
Speaker 3: isn't what I wanted for myself, and so I think
8:10
Speaker 3: for younger women, if I could teach a college course,
8:13
Speaker 3: especially like business women is however you want to do,
8:17
Speaker 3: it is the right way, but make sure it reflects
8:20
Speaker 3: who you are, what you really think you want, because
8:23
Speaker 3: I think a lot of us think I want to
8:25
Speaker 3: kick ass and take up space and make my own
8:28
Speaker 3: money and do all these things. But oh, wait a second,
8:30
Speaker 3: I might also maybe like to have a family, and
8:34
Speaker 3: so really to get these twenty somethings to go, as
8:38
Speaker 3: you're structuring and navigating these courses, how is that all
8:42
Speaker 3: playing into this bigger picture. It is very hard to do,
8:47
Speaker 3: especially harder as the female, because when I'm at work,
8:51
Speaker 3: I'm always still going to be thinking about my kids.
8:54
Speaker 3: I tell my girls as a parent what I'm gunning for,
8:57
Speaker 3: because it is really the number one job that you
8:59
Speaker 3: kind of have one shot at. What are the things
9:02
Speaker 3: I'm okay apologizing for pretty much for them, because whether
9:07
Speaker 3: we'll go over it or not. I think something I
9:09
Speaker 3: learned from my mother, who was young when she had
9:11
Speaker 3: me and wasn't always around. I learned from her you
9:16
Speaker 3: can always apologize. You can always make changes, but ultimately
9:19
Speaker 3: try to craft your life in a way that you're
9:22
Speaker 3: not going to have to not only apologize for something
9:25
Speaker 3: you don't mind, but that you don't get the time back.
9:28
Speaker 1: I've never thought about being pulled around in the way
9:31
Speaker 1: you said, but I feel that, and so I'm glad
9:34
Speaker 1: I heard that today.
9:36
Speaker 3: And I know we do live in a time and
9:38
Speaker 3: whether people like it or not, typically there's always exceptions.
9:42
Speaker 3: Men and women are different. If we're going to work, right,
9:45
Speaker 3: that's the masculine energy, let's call it that, and we
9:49
Speaker 3: can't expect their experience to be the same. So how
9:53
Speaker 3: do we if we want to play in that masculine space?
9:55
Speaker 3: What does that look like for us?
9:57
Speaker 1: Okay, so before we come back to present day, I
10:00
Speaker 1: need to backtrack to twelve year old Gabby. You were
10:03
Speaker 1: six feet tall at twelve years old?
10:06
Speaker 3: Yes, I was six feet tall. I was down growing
10:08
Speaker 3: at fifteen at six'.
10:10
Speaker 1: Three you know what they line you up for graduation
10:13
Speaker 1: at like tallest to. SHORTEST i was always the shortest
10:16
Speaker 1: person in the. GLASS i cannot imagine what it was
10:19
Speaker 1: like to be six feet tall at twelve years.
10:21
Speaker 2: Old how did it develop or impact who you?
10:24
Speaker 3: Became i'm actually really, grateful AND i want to remind
10:27
Speaker 3: people that anything that is one of our burdens that
10:30
Speaker 3: we perceive as a, burden is one of our. Gifts
10:33
Speaker 3: it's there to teach us whatever the lessons. ARE i
10:36
Speaker 3: grew up in The, caribbean SO i was in The.
10:37
Speaker 3: CARIBBEAN i lived on an, island AND i looked physically.
10:41
Speaker 3: Different but WHAT i learned right then was you're never
10:45
Speaker 3: going to fit, in and there is a really practical
10:48
Speaker 3: side of my. Personality so it was, Like, Okay i'm
10:50
Speaker 3: not going to bother and that really has played out
10:53
Speaker 3: throughout my. Life where it's going back to that thing
10:56
Speaker 3: we're talking about is playing by the rules in the
10:59
Speaker 3: game you're. Playing that reflects, you AND i think when
11:03
Speaker 3: you stop trying to fit, in what it asked you is,
11:06
Speaker 3: okay well then who AM? I i THINK i asked
11:08
Speaker 3: that question a lot earlier in life because of being physically.
11:12
Speaker 1: Different do you remember the first time you felt really
11:15
Speaker 1: connected to.
11:16
Speaker 3: VOLLEYBALL i think it was more in. COLLEGE i had
11:20
Speaker 3: a really good college coach AND i really learned how
11:24
Speaker 3: to play the. GAME i was late to the, game but,
11:27
Speaker 3: ultimately what volleyball gave me was, structure, framework hard, work and,
11:32
Speaker 3: discipline WHICH i naturally. Have but what it did it
11:36
Speaker 3: gave me this place to really develop that and to
11:39
Speaker 3: sort of learn to earn something that if you're not good,
11:42
Speaker 3: enough you won't get to. Play that you may come
11:45
Speaker 3: and play in a day and play your, best and
11:48
Speaker 3: that may not be good enough to. Win someone might beat.
11:50
Speaker 3: You it's a hard, lesson it. Is it's a great.
11:53
Speaker 3: Lesson it gave me a, family it gave me something
11:55
Speaker 3: to be a part, of and it gave me a,
11:58
Speaker 3: place especially WHEN i was, younger that OH i fit
12:00
Speaker 3: because all the other girls kind of look like. THAT
12:02
Speaker 3: i am not unusual in the volleyball. World and so
12:06
Speaker 3: that's HOW i connected really to.
12:08
Speaker 1: Volleyball if you had to put a percentage on, it
12:11
Speaker 1: how much is natural talent versus hard?
12:14
Speaker 3: Work natural talent is when you're, young, right you get
12:17
Speaker 3: on a, team you, play and then all of a
12:18
Speaker 3: sudden you're talented enough to get through the next. Level
12:21
Speaker 3: when you then get into the college, level talent still,
12:25
Speaker 3: counts but then you see all the people who have work,
12:27
Speaker 3: ethic they start to come on. Up and if you're
12:31
Speaker 3: in a big, college and then if you play in the,
12:32
Speaker 3: pros everyone is somewhat, Talented so it's really your ability
12:37
Speaker 3: to deal with pressure and your ability to take information
12:41
Speaker 3: in and translate it to, action and that is, CONNECTED
12:44
Speaker 3: i think to work in. Practice when you.
12:47
Speaker 1: Were, playing it didn't seem like there were as many
12:49
Speaker 1: books about sports psychology and people talking about the mental
12:53
Speaker 1: aspect of. It did you have any tools that you
12:56
Speaker 1: came up with that helped you deal with all the
12:59
Speaker 1: Pressure because you were in pretty high stakes, ENVIRONMENTS.
13:03
Speaker 3: I needed to earn. IT i was a person who, thought,
13:08
Speaker 3: well If i'm going to deserve, This i'm going to
13:10
Speaker 3: have to work really. Hard SO i leaned on work
13:14
Speaker 3: as a way to manage. That my college, coach who's
13:18
Speaker 3: still my very dear, friend i'ven't played for her since
13:21
Speaker 3: nineteen ninety. One, okay she'd say to, Us, OKAY i
13:24
Speaker 3: kicked your butt all. Week Now i'd go out and
13:26
Speaker 3: kick their. Butt BUT i WISH i had learned, sooner,
13:29
Speaker 3: like for, example it's okay to want to. WIN i
13:32
Speaker 3: can still be a nice and good person and want
13:35
Speaker 3: to shut you. Down and that was SOMETHING i THINK
13:38
Speaker 3: i battled with for a really long, time LIKE i
13:40
Speaker 3: want to win Because i've been working so, hard but,
13:43
Speaker 3: LIKE i don't really want to hurt too many people's.
13:45
Speaker 3: Feelings and what you learn is in, work it's a competitive.
13:48
Speaker 3: Environment you can still be, ethical you don't have to
13:50
Speaker 3: step on people's, heads but it's okay to SAY i
13:54
Speaker 3: would like to do, That i'd like to go, There
13:56
Speaker 3: i'd like to take ownership of that, space and it
13:59
Speaker 3: is in. Person and so REALLY i think that was so,
14:02
Speaker 3: helpful was developing. That BUT i needed that hard work
14:06
Speaker 3: to give myself the.
14:07
Speaker 1: Permission that is something because there's that statistic that people
14:11
Speaker 1: talk about over the last two years THAT i think
14:13
Speaker 1: like ninety four percent Of fortune five hundred female CEOs played.
14:17
Speaker 2: SPORTS i think that's the.
14:19
Speaker 3: Thing and it's learning how to lose and putting together
14:23
Speaker 3: a strategy on learning from that and then moving, forward
14:27
Speaker 3: and also learning to take constructive criticism because coaches are
14:32
Speaker 3: ultimately criticizing your weaknesses and kind of exploiting them and
14:36
Speaker 3: getting you to work on, them and also reminding you
14:39
Speaker 3: of your, strengths which is good, too and learning. TOO
14:43
Speaker 3: i think something really important is the value of. Cooperation
14:46
Speaker 3: if you AND i work, together chances are we're actually
14:48
Speaker 3: going to be. Better so not being threatened by other people's,
14:51
Speaker 3: power strengths and. Skills and then the other side of
14:54
Speaker 3: that is understanding that when someone is, saying, hey that's
14:58
Speaker 3: not good enough or that's not, right that doesn't mean
15:01
Speaker 3: you're not. Good that doesn't mean you still can't be.
15:04
Speaker 3: Successful but it also, means, hey don't be afraid of those.
15:07
Speaker 3: Things keep working on those things because that powers, everything
15:10
Speaker 3: instead of, like well that hurt my feelings or what
15:12
Speaker 3: does that? Mean, NOW i will say, this it's also
15:16
Speaker 3: having the right people criticizing, you the right mentor if
15:20
Speaker 3: you're in a work, environment the right, coach if you're
15:22
Speaker 3: an athletic. Environment so it isn't about taking input from
15:25
Speaker 3: every idiot around. You so that's really important. Too and
15:28
Speaker 3: that taught me that, like, hey, yeah that's. GOOD i
15:30
Speaker 3: appreciate your, opinion but guess, WHAT i don't Think i'm
15:33
Speaker 3: actually going to take criticism or opinions from this particular.
15:38
Speaker 3: Person were you a trash?
15:39
Speaker 2: Talker not at?
15:41
Speaker 3: All, None, no because that always bites you in the.
15:44
Speaker 3: ASS i mean certain people they feed on that fuel
15:46
Speaker 3: and they can get in the. COMBAT i was pretty
15:49
Speaker 3: stoic AND i kept most of the energy on my
15:51
Speaker 3: side of the. Court of, course there was occasions certain,
15:54
Speaker 3: girls certain players where you, know you just got on
15:56
Speaker 3: each other's, nerves and so of course if there was
15:59
Speaker 3: a play then went you're. Favor in that, moment you
16:01
Speaker 3: might kind of be, like say, yay but then look
16:03
Speaker 3: right at them kind of.
16:04
Speaker 1: THING i love that so much because WHEN i was
16:07
Speaker 1: watching your old, tape you did keep the energy on
16:10
Speaker 1: your side of the.
16:11
Speaker 2: Court but when you went for, it watch.
16:13
Speaker 3: Out, well everybody's going for. It they're all a bunch of,
16:16
Speaker 3: beest these. Girls so, listen that's part of the. Job you.
16:19
Speaker 3: Know this is WHAT i say because a lot of
16:21
Speaker 3: times people will, say, oh you're seems so grounded and.
16:23
Speaker 3: HUMBLE i THINK i certainly am. GROUNDED i don't Think i'm.
16:26
Speaker 3: Humble WHAT i think IS i kind of know the
16:30
Speaker 3: law of, life and So i'm not. HUMBLE i just
16:33
Speaker 3: don't need to learn those lessons. AGAIN i don't need
16:37
Speaker 3: to be slapped back into. Place and in, Fact i'm
16:40
Speaker 3: trying to live my life in a way to pick
16:42
Speaker 3: up the cues. Early oh you know, what course correct
16:46
Speaker 3: adjust so THAT i don't have to get really knocked
16:48
Speaker 3: on my butt to go oh. Okay so it's not
16:51
Speaker 3: That i'm. HUMBLE i have a sense of how it.
16:53
Speaker 2: Works you're. Realistic, yeah and.
16:55
Speaker 3: When you get high and, MIGHTY i think you know,
16:58
Speaker 3: life the, Universe god is, like, HUH i got something for.
17:02
Speaker 3: You and there's a part of me that's pretty self,
17:05
Speaker 3: protective and So i'm always looking to learn the lessons
17:09
Speaker 3: As i'm.
17:09
Speaker 2: Going did you ever Watch The office a little?
17:12
Speaker 3: Bit?
17:12
Speaker 1: Yeah of COURSE i didn't watch all of, it but
17:14
Speaker 1: there's this one episode THAT i think about a lot
17:16
Speaker 1: because At helm, SAYS i wish there was a way
17:19
Speaker 1: to know you're in the good old. Days AND i
17:21
Speaker 1: think oftentimes we miss the middle of the. Day we
17:26
Speaker 1: don't know because we don't know what life throws at.
17:28
Speaker 1: Us when you think about those peak volleyball, days do
17:32
Speaker 1: you miss?
17:32
Speaker 3: Them, yeah of. COURSE i MEAN i miss. COMPETING i miss,
17:35
Speaker 3: playing you, know, sweaty, dirty yelling like, hard it, sucks it's.
17:41
Speaker 3: Awesome this is a type of frequency that you're going
17:44
Speaker 3: to be at only in those. Environments it's what's, Expected
17:48
Speaker 3: it's like how it's supposed to. Be SO i miss that,
17:50
Speaker 3: part AND i miss like this apex of learning and
17:54
Speaker 3: practicing and executing that feels so good And you can
17:57
Speaker 3: find that in other ways in your, life but there's
17:59
Speaker 3: no thing kind of like. Sport it's so specific.
18:03
Speaker 2: Because even if you're doing it in, business you're not.
18:05
Speaker 3: Sweating there's a pureeness of sport where you, know with
18:11
Speaker 3: the exception of like, love you don't have. That you're
18:13
Speaker 3: not going to have that in business because in business
18:15
Speaker 3: you're going to be treated, unfairly you're going to get
18:17
Speaker 3: weird benefits that you didn't maybe. Earn and it's, timing it's,
18:21
Speaker 3: markets it's your executive, like it's a million. Variables and
18:25
Speaker 3: in sport it's so stripped down and so simple that.
18:28
Speaker 3: PART i really.
18:29
Speaker 2: Loved your eyes lit up talking about.
18:31
Speaker 3: It, well, yeah because it's sort of like, going, okay
18:33
Speaker 3: HERE i. Am there's a nakedness to that WHICH i
18:38
Speaker 3: think empowers, us because you, Go i'm willing to be
18:41
Speaker 3: vulnerable and risk.
18:43
Speaker 1: Losing was there a period of time or a moment
18:47
Speaker 1: that you remember when you doubted?
18:48
Speaker 2: Yourself?
18:49
Speaker 3: Oh. Constantly anyone that says they don't live and walk with,
18:53
Speaker 3: doubt they're either in. Denial i've learned to use doubt
18:58
Speaker 3: as fuel and go, ooh why AM i scared of?
19:02
Speaker 3: That or why does that make me? Uncomfortable or why
19:04
Speaker 3: AM i doubting? Myself is that an old? Narrative is
19:07
Speaker 3: that a childhood? NARRATIVE i use doubt as a companion
19:11
Speaker 3: to assess myself as a.
19:13
Speaker 1: Teacher if you can take me back to a time
19:16
Speaker 1: that you felt, it even if it's, recent like business.
19:19
Speaker 3: Or in, parenting it's. Constant AM i too easy going
19:23
Speaker 3: with my? Kids SHOULD i have forced them to do certain?
19:25
Speaker 3: Things that's one THING i. Joke i'm, like, well Either
19:28
Speaker 3: i'm a genius Or i'm an idiot on this. One we'll.
19:30
Speaker 3: See and even in my own, career my youngest kid
19:33
Speaker 3: is a senior in high, school and so Now i'm
19:35
Speaker 3: sort of re gathering all of my energy and, saying,
19:39
Speaker 3: Okay i'm ready to go. Again so in my TWENTIES
19:42
Speaker 3: i really was self. Focused it was about my, career my.
19:44
Speaker 3: SPORTS i met my husband in my mid, twenties which
19:47
Speaker 3: is sort of. Interesting and then all of a, sudden
19:49
Speaker 3: the energy starts to you, know it leaks into other
19:52
Speaker 3: places because that's what you want. Too and Now i'm
19:55
Speaker 3: in a place Where i'm sort of recoiling my, energy
19:57
Speaker 3: and so the doubt comes in in AM i too?
20:00
Speaker 3: Old AM i too. IRRELEVANT i, mean this is just
20:03
Speaker 3: being really frank about it is the way THAT i do,
20:07
Speaker 3: it or my message or the way my brain's hardwired
20:09
Speaker 3: at a. Date and then you, go, okay Well i'll
20:12
Speaker 3: move forward And i'll trust, myself But i'll also pay
20:15
Speaker 3: attention and see what THINGS i could incorporate that are
20:19
Speaker 3: still genuine to.
20:20
Speaker 1: Me you're like a life, Anthropologist like you're just like,
20:24
Speaker 1: collecting collecting and then figuring out what fits for you
20:27
Speaker 1: and throwing the rest.
20:28
Speaker 3: Away, yeah and honoring the Ones i'm going to throw.
20:31
Speaker 3: OUT i have a. Sense but that's the other thing
20:34
Speaker 3: to be careful of is not getting so locked into,
20:37
Speaker 3: well this is WHO i, am because then we miss
20:40
Speaker 3: the opportunity for changing. Growth so it's kind of using,
20:43
Speaker 3: both but it's really SAYING i really admire that about that,
20:47
Speaker 3: person But i'm not, them AND i don't do it that.
20:49
Speaker 3: Way And sport teaches you that because you kind of
20:51
Speaker 3: have a, job and you, go, god she does, that so,
20:53
Speaker 3: WELL i don't do. That it's. Both it's collecting and,
20:56
Speaker 3: leaving but it's still listening to the internal instincts and.
21:01
Speaker 1: Whisper in your first, book you Wrote everything A woman
21:05
Speaker 1: does has an emotional. Component paying attention to my emotional
21:08
Speaker 1: side without surrendering to it is one of the toughest
21:11
Speaker 1: parts of playing professional. Sports i'm curious how your relationship
21:15
Speaker 1: to your emotional side has changed since you wrote that
21:18
Speaker 1: in nineteen ninety. Seven are you more emotional now or
21:20
Speaker 1: less or just in tune with it?
21:22
Speaker 3: Differently, well, okay, first let me preface by Saying i'm
21:25
Speaker 3: probably not the most emotional person there. Is i'm very, analytical,
21:30
Speaker 3: Right i'm not afraid to show my. Emotion it's just
21:33
Speaker 3: not my actual natural. Process like if you watch.
21:37
Speaker 1: Movies if you watch you, know Step, Mom, yeah that
21:40
Speaker 1: movie kills. Me are you?
21:42
Speaker 2: Crying and Step?
21:43
Speaker 3: MOM i mean like IF i have my, Period i'm,
21:45
Speaker 3: LIGHT i don't know, See or If i'm in an,
21:47
Speaker 3: Airplane i'll cry all the, time. RIGHT i think it's
21:49
Speaker 3: because you're in fight or flight and so you're, like
21:51
Speaker 3: oh my, god the dog's still at the train, station you,
21:53
Speaker 3: know waiting for the owner was never, coming you.
21:55
Speaker 1: Know.
21:56
Speaker 3: YEAH i think the most important way that it's shown
21:59
Speaker 3: up for me in the years since then is in.
22:03
Speaker 3: Business if you're in the, role because these are just
22:07
Speaker 3: roles right where you are having to be the boss
22:10
Speaker 3: and say it, straight get rid of, somebody make a.
22:13
Speaker 3: CHANGE i have really learned to not have to be
22:16
Speaker 3: aggravated to do, that because Before i'd be, like, WELL
22:19
Speaker 3: i don't want to hurt anyone's. FEELINGS i don't want
22:21
Speaker 3: to make, changes and now it's, like, hey, listen something
22:25
Speaker 3: has to. HAPPEN i can be, RESPECTFUL i can try
22:28
Speaker 3: to be, loving but you still have to be direct
22:30
Speaker 3: and you're probably going to say something that someone's not
22:34
Speaker 3: going to. Like and so in That i've gotten way
22:36
Speaker 3: better at being okay with somebody not liking. Something i'm going.
22:41
Speaker 2: To, say how DO i shed?
22:43
Speaker 1: THAT i feel like that's my final frontier AND i
22:45
Speaker 1: hear it from so many people that sit in this.
22:48
Speaker 3: Chair it's a big. Frontier did you shed?
22:50
Speaker 2: It or was it? Gradual it's been.
22:52
Speaker 3: Gradual it's been gradual in a lot of, practice practice
22:55
Speaker 3: in my relationship, practice in my, business, life practice with my.
22:59
Speaker 3: Kids so it's the practice OF i need to say.
23:02
Speaker 3: This so WHAT i do IS i check first. Inside
23:06
Speaker 3: AM i? Scared because Then i'm gonna me. Personally i'm
23:10
Speaker 3: going to come out and be kind of aggressive because
23:12
Speaker 3: that's WHAT i. DO i lean into things WHEN i get,
23:15
Speaker 3: scared BUT i use force and. Aggression it's, like, okay
23:19
Speaker 3: we'll calm down with. That so if you're, mad you usually.
23:22
Speaker 3: Scared if you're feeling, aggressive you're usually. Scared so it's
23:26
Speaker 3: going no the change this tests to. Happen WHAT i
23:28
Speaker 3: try to do now is just, say are you coming
23:31
Speaker 3: from a loving place that's pretty still and clear about
23:36
Speaker 3: what all the goals, are and then be okay with?
23:39
Speaker 3: That and you know WHAT i say to people is
23:41
Speaker 3: don't apologize if you don't answer your email in the
23:44
Speaker 3: first thirty, seconds and don't end a conversation with if that's,
23:48
Speaker 3: okay because it may not. Be and that's not what
23:52
Speaker 3: we're talking. About if you're okay, now if it's an interpersonal,
23:55
Speaker 3: RELATIONSHIP i might be, like, hey, Listen but if we're,
23:59
Speaker 3: talking especially in the work, environment it's being, like this
24:03
Speaker 3: is just part of the. Deal.
24:05
Speaker 2: Okay in this, VEIN i need YOUR pov on, something.
24:08
Speaker 1: OKAY i come from The Gabby reese kind of hard
24:12
Speaker 1: knocks school of, thought like if you want, something you
24:14
Speaker 1: push Through Simone biles in The. Olympics i'm going to
24:17
Speaker 1: say something that's not going to be. Popular my first
24:20
Speaker 1: instinct was you're at The. Olympics figure it. Out now
24:25
Speaker 1: is not the, time like mind over. Matter ONCE i
24:27
Speaker 1: understood what the twisties, WERE i understood that it was.
24:30
Speaker 1: DANGEROUS i get. It and we don't have to pick her.
24:33
Speaker 1: Specifically but the conversation of mental health in, sport where
24:37
Speaker 1: do you?
24:38
Speaker 2: Stand are you hard knocks school all the way or
24:41
Speaker 2: is there a middle?
24:42
Speaker 3: Ground, well let's talk about The Simone biles thing for a,
24:44
Speaker 3: second because what you don't maybe realize, Subconsciously i'm gonna
24:47
Speaker 3: take a stab at, it maybe BECAUSE i had my
24:49
Speaker 3: own experience about. It Naomi osaka had just come up
24:53
Speaker 3: prior to, that, right and she. Withdrew, now if you
24:56
Speaker 3: get hit with a tennis, ball it's like. Volleyball it's
24:58
Speaker 3: like you're gonna be. Okay so in that, CASE i
25:01
Speaker 3: might be, like, hey, listen you're a. Professional you paid
25:03
Speaker 3: tens of millions of. Dollars so if you're going to
25:06
Speaker 3: give all the money back to Your japanese sponsors and say,
25:09
Speaker 3: Hey i'm taking a, Break i'd be, like, okay. Cool
25:12
Speaker 3: but for, me it's like you can't have the one
25:14
Speaker 3: and not do the. Other, now in The Simone biles,
25:16
Speaker 3: case because it's. Dangerous that had a nuance that unless
25:21
Speaker 3: you're in that situation where it's life and, death like
25:26
Speaker 3: you break your, neck my husband does a sport that's very,
25:28
Speaker 3: dangerous that might be a little, different and it might
25:31
Speaker 3: be interesting that she was able to do that, Then
25:36
Speaker 3: but it was strange because she'd already been a, winner
25:39
Speaker 3: and it was, like, well you knew what you were
25:40
Speaker 3: competing for and signing up, for but maybe this was
25:43
Speaker 3: an unexpected. Variable in, general work is, hard sports is.
25:49
Speaker 3: HARD i think you have to expect. That so MAYBE
25:53
Speaker 3: i appreciate the conversation and parts of it are an.
25:56
Speaker 3: OVERCORRECTION i Think i'm in line with.
25:58
Speaker 1: YOU i also think it's interesting that oftentimes women are
26:02
Speaker 1: the ones that open things up to a larger. Conversation
26:06
Speaker 1: but we've only really heard about it.
26:08
Speaker 2: With women in.
26:09
Speaker 1: Sport we haven't really heard about men talking about mental
26:12
Speaker 1: health and. Sport and it definitely, exists.
26:14
Speaker 3: Absolutely and by the, way there's far more men playing.
26:17
Speaker 3: Sports the expectation is completely. Different but this is WHERE
26:21
Speaker 3: i also think biology comes into. Play you, know even women,
26:24
Speaker 3: training so a lot of times those female, athletes they
26:27
Speaker 3: train in certain ways almost harder than male. Athletes AND
26:30
Speaker 3: i always likened it to, hey If i'm going from
26:35
Speaker 3: me sitting here with you, TOO i have to go.
26:37
Speaker 3: Compete the jump for me sometimes is a much bigger
26:41
Speaker 3: chasm than a guy going, hey Cool, burrow what's up
26:45
Speaker 3: and then like now we're going to go and award each.
26:47
Speaker 3: Other they can go like. That that's WHY i always,
26:49
Speaker 3: say if you see female athletes that have a lot of,
26:51
Speaker 3: brothers they make the transition really. Quickly SO i think
26:56
Speaker 3: we're just talking about different types of, people different, hormones, testosterone, right,
27:05
Speaker 3: like all these things that come into it where that's,
27:08
Speaker 3: why for, example we've just had all these fires IN
27:10
Speaker 3: la the firemen go into the burning building or do
27:13
Speaker 3: the thing without, questioning and a lot of THAT i
27:16
Speaker 3: think is a physiological and biological thing that everybody wants to.
27:21
Speaker 3: Ignore and my husband has a joke that women are
27:23
Speaker 3: far more valuable than, men right think about it in
27:27
Speaker 3: a certain, way just for. Survival and so he's, like
27:32
Speaker 3: you can't afford just to huck. Yourself he's like, us
27:34
Speaker 3: we can go in there and do it, right and
27:38
Speaker 3: it's a beautiful. Thing but it shows up also in.
27:41
Speaker 3: Sport why in certain way guys are, like, yeah we
27:44
Speaker 3: just go AND i think it's so great because it.
27:47
Speaker 3: Is it's just a little more.
27:49
Speaker 1: COMPLEX i wrote this down BECAUSE i Know i'm not
27:51
Speaker 1: going to say it. Right so for, years women's beach
27:55
Speaker 1: volleyball players were required to wear, bikinis but men were
27:58
Speaker 1: wearing shorts AND t.
28:00
Speaker 3: Shirts, well, yeah because a lot of times they have their,
28:02
Speaker 3: number like we had it on our, tops so they
28:05
Speaker 3: would have their one or two so you knew which
28:08
Speaker 3: country and which number player they. WERE i think that
28:11
Speaker 3: rule has since. Changed brazil just won the gold and
28:13
Speaker 3: one of the players was in, Shorts.
28:15
Speaker 1: So as of twenty twelve In, london women are allowed
28:19
Speaker 1: to wear shorts and a tank. Top the shorts are
28:22
Speaker 1: still pretty short that they have to.
28:23
Speaker 3: Wear, actually the girl From brazil had longer. Shorts, yeah
28:27
Speaker 3: let me be really overly realistic about. This, Yes so
28:31
Speaker 3: the group probably a bunch of guys selling beach volleyball
28:34
Speaker 3: trying to get into The. Olympics they looked at all
28:37
Speaker 3: the things that were attractive about the sport and they, went,
28:40
Speaker 3: oh pretty, ladies and so they, went we're going to
28:43
Speaker 3: pull that. Lever it's a low hanging, fruit is it?
28:45
Speaker 3: Right probably. Not but That's i'm sure what the thinking.
28:50
Speaker 1: Was, WELL i was thinking, too LIKE i always asked the,
28:52
Speaker 1: why And i'm, like, well it probably helped grow the sports.
28:55
Speaker 3: It, did and everyone can. Go women should just be
28:58
Speaker 3: able to, perform of course they. Should.
29:00
Speaker 2: Good were you ever annoyed about?
29:01
Speaker 1: It?
29:02
Speaker 3: Well see WHEN i, played you, know, INTERNATIONALLY i wore
29:05
Speaker 3: the bathing. SIT i was just more. UNCOMFORTABLE i always
29:08
Speaker 3: WHEN i played in THE us were running tights BECAUSE
29:11
Speaker 3: i like the idea of not having to think about
29:13
Speaker 3: it and pull my baby's out of my butt and
29:14
Speaker 3: do all that. Stuff BUT i, thought, okay well this
29:17
Speaker 3: is what we're, doing AND i wasn't spending a whole
29:20
Speaker 3: lot of time getting upset about. It because the sport
29:24
Speaker 3: is so small and so, vulnerable it's so hard to
29:27
Speaker 3: make a living at, THAT i, Thought, Okay i'm going
29:30
Speaker 3: to participate in being part of. Something and once you watch,
29:33
Speaker 3: it you're not sitting there going who she's? Hot of,
29:36
Speaker 3: course you're recognizing this is a world class athlete who's,
29:39
Speaker 3: training AND i think that ends up transcending that she's
29:43
Speaker 3: in a. Bikini like AM i supposed to control how every,
29:46
Speaker 3: viewer what they, react think and feel and what they
29:49
Speaker 3: hold up is. Important. No having said, that, Though i'm
29:53
Speaker 3: happy that it's, like, hey where what you're comfortable? Wearing?
29:56
Speaker 1: Competing you've had such a close relationship with your body
30:00
Speaker 1: from such a young age because of your. Athletics what's
30:03
Speaker 1: your relationship with your body like?
30:05
Speaker 3: NOW i have a really peaceful relationship with my. BODY
30:08
Speaker 3: i wish my knees worked, better BUT i do the
30:10
Speaker 3: THINGS i can do to control having a positive relationship
30:15
Speaker 3: with my, body and THEN i just let the chips
30:17
Speaker 3: fall where they are BECAUSE i am getting, older that's
30:21
Speaker 3: part of. Life BUT i eat, WELL i go to,
30:23
Speaker 3: BED i don't, DRINK i train very. Hard the work
30:26
Speaker 3: enables me to have a freedom and also a level of.
30:31
Speaker 3: ACCEPTANCE i think when we grind it, out it's because
30:34
Speaker 3: we know we're not doing all we can. Do and
30:36
Speaker 3: by the, WAY i could still do, MORE i could
30:38
Speaker 3: still do.
30:39
Speaker 1: Better SO i love watching videos of you And. Laird
30:42
Speaker 1: you guys seem like you have a lot of fun,
30:44
Speaker 1: together AND i know that you're both competitive. People does
30:49
Speaker 1: the competition push you to do?
30:51
Speaker 2: Better you're shaking your.
30:52
Speaker 3: Head don't compete with your, partner.
30:54
Speaker 2: But, like do you guys compete physically at.
30:56
Speaker 3: ALL i can't compete With. LARD i could try to
30:58
Speaker 3: out Smart laird here and.
30:59
Speaker 2: There, No but, Okay i'll give you an.
31:01
Speaker 1: Example my mom is a big workout girl and she's
31:04
Speaker 1: in her, sixties and WHEN i go home and i'm with,
31:08
Speaker 1: Her i'm really inspired to work out Because i'm, LIKE
31:11
Speaker 1: i can't believe she's doing more push ups than, Me,
31:14
Speaker 1: LIKE i want the best for, her but we're in.
31:15
Speaker 2: Competition, no she's. Inspired you do you inspire each?
31:19
Speaker 1: Other?
31:19
Speaker 3: Yeah laird really inspires. Me he really, does because he's
31:24
Speaker 3: walking his own path in the truest, way and even
31:28
Speaker 3: when he's in discomfort or, whatever he's showing up in
31:32
Speaker 3: all the, facets and SO i utilize him as a
31:35
Speaker 3: great source of inspiration and. Fun and ALSO i always
31:39
Speaker 3: SAY i tuck in a lot Behind. LAIRD i draft
31:42
Speaker 3: Off laird's energy Because i'm very disciplined AND i can,
31:46
Speaker 3: go but he's actually even at a higher, level and
31:49
Speaker 3: so Sometimes i'm, like, oh who wants to deal with?
31:51
Speaker 3: THIS i just took him behind, him AND i draft
31:54
Speaker 3: off him on the days THAT i don't have. It
31:57
Speaker 3: that's WHAT i would encourage people is be that for
32:00
Speaker 3: everyone in your, life but also be surrounded by people
32:04
Speaker 3: who are that for. You because if you want to ask,
32:07
Speaker 3: me one of the biggest you, know the most powerful
32:10
Speaker 3: levers and tools that we, have it's each other.
32:13
Speaker 2: That's really beautiful and.
32:14
Speaker 3: Powerful, well that's being on a team when you can
32:17
Speaker 3: be better with someone, else when one in one can equal.
32:20
Speaker 3: Three and you know that when you feel that harmony
32:23
Speaker 3: and those energies coming together and, amplifying and you can
32:26
Speaker 3: have that in a. Friendship you know this with your best.
32:28
Speaker 3: GIRLFRIENDS i can even have this in moments with my,
32:31
Speaker 3: children even Though i'm not looking for them to inspire,
32:34
Speaker 3: me BUT i can look at them and think she's
32:37
Speaker 3: trying to do it in her. Life that's pretty. Great
32:40
Speaker 3: so it's be. That but that's really more the. Goal
32:44
Speaker 3: right When i'm going through my, Life i'm trying to be.
32:47
Speaker 3: That like if you come across me at the grocery
32:49
Speaker 3: store AND i, say, hey good. Morning my goal is
32:52
Speaker 3: just to leave a place a little better than you
32:55
Speaker 3: know WHEN i first got, there AND i find that
32:59
Speaker 3: then you tracked those types of people.
33:02
Speaker 1: Well in that vein we met because of your going first.
33:05
Speaker 1: PHILOSOPHY i read it In Tim ferriss's book and it
33:09
Speaker 1: really changed my. Life, Gabby where did the philosophy come?
33:12
Speaker 3: From it came from being. Tall people hear me say go,
33:15
Speaker 3: first and you'd think like it would be like cut
33:18
Speaker 3: someone off on the, road get on the front of the,
33:19
Speaker 3: line and go. First was developed from also reading lots
33:24
Speaker 3: of things About i've said this quote a lot of.
33:27
Speaker 3: Times In Natural Born. Heroes there's a book it says
33:31
Speaker 3: to be a true, warrior one must be. Compassionate and
33:35
Speaker 3: my whole thing is truly to be as sort of
33:39
Speaker 3: strong and badass AS i can. Be and WHAT i
33:42
Speaker 3: know that means is that THEN i have to be
33:47
Speaker 3: a great supporter EVERYWHERE i am in, life and that
33:51
Speaker 3: could mean opening the door for, somebody saying hello first to.
33:55
Speaker 3: Somebody so being six' three and, a female there's an,
33:59
Speaker 3: interesting PERMISSION and i have to go into everybody's Space
34:02
Speaker 3: because i'm. A WOMAN if i was a six', TO
34:05
Speaker 3: three guy i might be able to do it, with
34:07
Speaker 3: other guys maybe. Not to women, As a woman i'm
34:10
Speaker 3: allowed to freely. Enter everyone's space SO why would i
34:14
Speaker 3: not take advantage of my size, and say hey how?
34:18
Speaker 3: Are you today and give people permission, to be open,
34:23
Speaker 3: to be friendly to acknowledge each other because maybe they
34:27
Speaker 3: see Me and think i'm not going to. Talk to
34:29
Speaker 3: HER and so i learned. That really early it first
34:32
Speaker 3: was a tool to try to diffuse people and make
34:34
Speaker 3: them feel comfortable and. Connect with them and then, you,
34:38
Speaker 3: just realize oh it's just a better.
34:40
Speaker 2: WAY to live i love that. YOU named it i.
34:44
Speaker 3: Didn't MEAN to when i, Can tell you tim was.
34:46
Speaker 3: AT my house i was with laired And my, friend
34:48
Speaker 3: brian McKenzie and we were all sitting there talking and
34:51
Speaker 3: when he, ASKED the question i. Thought, about it honestly.
34:54
Speaker 2: What was the question?
34:55
Speaker 3: That?
34:55
Speaker 2: He, asked you remember like if, you.
34:56
Speaker 3: Had, one? You KNOW advice and i, really ABOUT it and,
35:01
Speaker 3: i was, like you know that doesn't seem like a bad.
35:03
Speaker 1: PLACE to start i feel like it should catch wind,
35:07
Speaker 1: on THE internet like i want.
35:08
Speaker 2: People to make.
35:09
Speaker 1: VIDEOS going first i think it's contagious, because you know
35:12
Speaker 1: like if you're.
35:13
Speaker 2: IN a room i don't know if.
35:14
Speaker 1: You've felt this but especially in la people don't really
35:18
Speaker 1: talk as much. To each other, they're standing alone having
35:20
Speaker 1: a drink or, on their phone and if somebody takes
35:25
Speaker 1: the initiative, to go first it breaks the. Ice for
35:28
Speaker 1: everybody it's. A domino effect. It's so contagious it's very,
35:31
Speaker 1: easy to do as hard. AS it is i have
35:34
Speaker 1: A joke now i've elaborated from. GO first too i
35:37
Speaker 1: bully everyone around me to be. POLITE to me i,
35:40
Speaker 1: have no, PROBLEM and weirdly i even. DO weird stuff
35:43
Speaker 1: i gently will put my hand, on someone's arm and
35:45
Speaker 1: if there's really, Like a thing i'll even gently put
35:47
Speaker 1: it on top, of their, shoulder which, subtly also though is.
35:51
Speaker 1: A dominance, move, it's like no we're gonna and so
35:54
Speaker 1: that is a liberty afforded.
35:56
Speaker 3: To me though because.
35:57
Speaker 1: Of my size do you go first first in your
36:01
Speaker 1: close relationships, with your kids, with your husband.
36:03
Speaker 3: WITH your, friends I do but i also don't need.
36:06
Speaker 3: TO as, MUCH i mean i live around a lot,
36:09
Speaker 3: of people who whether you want them, to or not
36:12
Speaker 3: they're sort of, coming your Way and the laird is
36:14
Speaker 3: A very present i can get caught up in my
36:17
Speaker 3: thoughts and lost in thoughts and planning and building and,
36:22
Speaker 3: thinking And details and. Laird is here so the other
36:27
Speaker 3: side of that sometimes is really that reminder of even
36:31
Speaker 3: if it's, for five minutes don't be here, and be.
36:34
Speaker 1: Here be here do you think you could pinpoint the
36:38
Speaker 1: greatest benefit to making that shift in your life.
36:42
Speaker 3: To going first we live in a, really loud world
36:46
Speaker 3: and it's set up that we're supposed to be at
36:49
Speaker 3: each other's throats because it's a really healthy distraction for
36:53
Speaker 3: all the naughty players to do whatever it is. That
36:56
Speaker 3: they're doing and what you learn when you go first
36:59
Speaker 3: in your day to day life is we're. All pretty
37:02
Speaker 3: similar we don't. Hate each other even, when we're Different
37:06
Speaker 3: we connect and it's just a reminder to me about
37:10
Speaker 3: that there. Is humanity everywhere you just have to participate
37:15
Speaker 3: and be a. Part of it and what that does
37:18
Speaker 3: is it allows me also besides that kind of faith,
37:23
Speaker 3: AND renewed faith i don't walk around really scared. In my,
37:26
Speaker 3: Life you know i'm not like freaked out by things
37:29
Speaker 3: or you have a different opinion and. It bothers, me it's,
37:31
Speaker 3: like it's okay. It's no problem it allows me not
37:34
Speaker 3: to get swept up in the frenzy that seems to
37:38
Speaker 3: sort of taken hold. Of us culturally.
37:41
Speaker 1: Speaking, of going first you were the first woman To
37:44
Speaker 1: have a.
37:45
Speaker 2: Nike design deal you MADE a.
37:47
Speaker 3: Shoe i, SAID you know i wanted to feel Like this,
37:49
Speaker 3: when I'M training and. I NEED that and I even
37:52
Speaker 3: joked i have a. VERY big foot i used to,
37:54
Speaker 3: say to TINKER and when i look down, AT my
37:56
Speaker 3: foot i would like it. To look smaller so he
37:58
Speaker 3: made the lines. A certain way because also training was
38:01
Speaker 3: like an everyday thing, in a uniform and sometimes, it's looked,
38:04
Speaker 3: good FEEL good so i, would dress accordingly but sometimes
38:06
Speaker 3: even looking at my foot, And being like i'm organized
38:09
Speaker 3: and have the. Footwork and listen it was GREAT timing
38:12
Speaker 3: and i was at the right place at. The right
38:14
Speaker 3: time what do you? Mean by that there's plenty of
38:17
Speaker 3: other female, athletes before me but the market wasn't there.
38:20
Speaker 3: Yet MY generation. When, I arrived obviously nike did the numbers, and,
38:25
Speaker 3: was like oh this is the. Time FOR that so
38:28
Speaker 3: i was in the right place at.
38:29
Speaker 2: The right time do you have the shoes? In your
38:32
Speaker 2: house do? You have extras they.
38:34
Speaker 3: Are in like a. SPARE bedroom closet. A few SKUs
38:37
Speaker 3: i think we did about four, or five, SKUs, you
38:39
Speaker 3: KNOW seasons so i have probably a version of. Each
38:42
Speaker 3: of that BUT one thing i Will say that i'm
38:44
Speaker 3: really mindful of. Is that happened it was great and
38:50
Speaker 3: there's a lot more. Stuff to do were your?
38:53
Speaker 2: Kids, wear them ever that's, kind of, cool you.
38:56
Speaker 3: Know it's INTERESTING one thing i really want. FOR my
38:58
Speaker 3: kids i just had this conversation with. My, middle daughter
39:01
Speaker 3: man cut your own path and make it. Big and
39:03
Speaker 3: wide don't look, at your dad don't. Look at myself
39:07
Speaker 3: you're your own person with your own whole thing. Ahead
39:11
Speaker 3: of you cut that path wide and do it. Your
39:13
Speaker 3: own way don't worry about you know. What we've done
39:17
Speaker 3: is that.
39:17
Speaker 2: Something That you and larry talk about or talked about even.
39:20
Speaker 2: BEFORE having, KIDS.
39:21
Speaker 3: I mean i think that's, our value system and then
39:24
Speaker 3: it probably got reinforced once the. Girls were here as just.
39:29
Speaker 3: A living practice that's how we parent, and less words
39:33
Speaker 3: more kind of. Acting that, way and occasionally like yesterday
39:37
Speaker 3: to my, MIDDLE daughter specifically i wrote her a, note,
39:40
Speaker 3: AND said hey i just want, to remind you like
39:44
Speaker 3: you are, a, very, intelligent talented. Powerful smart person cut
39:50
Speaker 3: your own path because we. All need that the world
39:53
Speaker 3: is a scary place and it's maybe scarier CERTAINLY than
39:57
Speaker 3: when i was. Becoming an adult and so just to
40:00
Speaker 3: keep reinforcing to trust yourself and to know that the
40:05
Speaker 3: whispers that you have about yourself. And your life they
40:09
Speaker 3: should be honored because that's how.
40:11
Speaker 1: We get there if we can put your realism aside.
40:14
Speaker 1: For one moment do you think that Your collab with
40:17
Speaker 1: nike paved the way for Female athlete collabse do you
40:23
Speaker 1: think it shifted things?
40:23
Speaker 3: In THE market if I get brass, taxi about it
40:26
Speaker 3: the fact that this shoe sold well meant that the.
40:29
Speaker 3: Program's PROBABLY expanded but i think that was going. TO
40:32
Speaker 3: happen anyway, I really do, i genuinely do and you'd
40:36
Speaker 3: be surprised how little a lot of women's athletics has
40:42
Speaker 3: expanded even. Since my, Day You know cheryl swoops had
40:46
Speaker 3: a shoe. RIGHT after me i think the success of
40:48
Speaker 3: that whole program. Probably allowed it but actually my hope
40:52
Speaker 3: is women's athletics gets a. Lot More attention but i'm
40:56
Speaker 3: always interested in how are these athletes? Making a living the,
40:59
Speaker 3: joke about it it'll. Be good, exposure, i'm like listen
41:02
Speaker 3: you're not going to pay your, rent with exposure. So
41:03
Speaker 3: get serious? What's your, business you know? What's your salary
41:07
Speaker 3: how are you? Making A living so i find. It even,
41:09
Speaker 3: fascinating FOR, example the wnba the players that were in college, doing,
41:14
Speaker 3: you know name image. And likeness deals we're making more
41:17
Speaker 3: money in some ways than they were going to make
41:19
Speaker 3: than when they turn pro because their. Salary is such
41:22
Speaker 3: now You Have. Like caitlin clark so there's these interesting things. That,
41:25
Speaker 3: we see yes the. Attention Is great what i'm really interested,
41:28
Speaker 3: in is great how do we set up the business
41:31
Speaker 3: so that these women can really make a healthy living
41:33
Speaker 3: for that period of time that They're doing sports because
41:36
Speaker 3: you'd be surprised what the. Average SALARY is so i
41:39
Speaker 3: always look at it past kind of the woof, and
41:42
Speaker 3: be like how are they? Paying these athletes and then
41:44
Speaker 3: there's the, other realistic part how, many you know tickets?
41:48
Speaker 3: Are they selling so, because, people, say oh well. It's
41:50
Speaker 3: not fair the men, get paid this LET'S, use the
41:52
Speaker 3: nba the women. Get paid, that, It's like okay but
41:55
Speaker 3: if we're going to be grown ups about it and,
41:56
Speaker 3: look at it how much does? This side earn how
41:58
Speaker 3: much does? That side earn so how do we grow
42:01
Speaker 3: this so that these athletes can.
42:03
Speaker 1: Make a living i've heard interesting debates around, that as
42:08
Speaker 1: well like some of it is like chicken, Or the
42:10
Speaker 1: egg like it took a while to prop up men's
42:12
Speaker 1: basketball and they have fun halftime shows and all the
42:16
Speaker 1: things that make you want to, attend a game and
42:18
Speaker 1: we haven't done that yet. For women's basketball it feels
42:21
Speaker 1: like it's just.
42:22
Speaker 3: Approaching IT is and i can add other dimensions to
42:26
Speaker 3: that idea which people don't. Maybe know fully so you
42:31
Speaker 3: can take a male athlete and you can say gets
42:33
Speaker 3: this many rebounds and scores this many points. And this great,
42:37
Speaker 3: for whatever reason we can take. A female athlete she
42:40
Speaker 3: can be the best. At her sport but somehow we still, want,
42:43
Speaker 3: to know well what dress? Is she wearing who?
42:46
Speaker 2: Is?
42:47
Speaker 3: She dating now she? Has a kid how is? She
42:49
Speaker 3: JUGGLING motherhood and, i always say instead of getting, offended
42:52
Speaker 3: BY that which, I never was i just think that
42:55
Speaker 3: we're attracted to women for different, and various reasons and,
42:59
Speaker 3: we're going like know? Who is she and so one
43:02
Speaker 3: of the mistakes we've made is that we don't tell
43:05
Speaker 3: enough stories about. The female athletes, and, they say no
43:08
Speaker 3: she should be able to go on the court and
43:09
Speaker 3: play and win and that. Should, be enough okay well how,
43:12
Speaker 3: has that worked or let's. Expand and go she has
43:17
Speaker 3: multi dimensional as. Male athletes are but, for, whatever reason
43:20
Speaker 3: hey you just get your. Rebounds we're good we might
43:23
Speaker 3: want to know what. CAR he drives, i don't know
43:25
Speaker 3: YOU know?
43:25
Speaker 1: What i mean but even if you think of the,
43:27
Speaker 1: best male athletes we do care about the lore. Of
43:30
Speaker 1: it all like we want To Know about. Lebron james
43:32
Speaker 1: family but it's.
43:33
Speaker 3: Not the same it just isn't, no matter what it's just.
43:35
Speaker 3: Not the same the leagues need. To understand storytelling we
43:39
Speaker 3: need to know who she is because then the audience
43:43
Speaker 3: will get invested. Also IN her do i appreciate? Her
43:46
Speaker 3: HARD work do i? Appreciate her SKILL of. Course i
43:48
Speaker 3: do but we're still marketing, two different products and so
43:51
Speaker 3: how do we?
43:52
Speaker 1: Do that better is there a business decision that you've
43:55
Speaker 1: made that you feel? Particularly proud of not really.
43:58
Speaker 3: The fact that i've been willing to fail and continue
44:02
Speaker 3: and succeed in business and try to learn and be
44:05
Speaker 3: willing to raise my, HAND and say i don't know,
44:07
Speaker 3: what that means? What's ebitda like help me out and
44:10
Speaker 3: also have my value show up. In my companies It's
44:14
Speaker 3: not that i'm. PROUD of that i wouldn't be able
44:15
Speaker 3: to go to bed at NIGHT consciously if i was
44:18
Speaker 3: compromising my values for the. Sake of business BUT one
44:22
Speaker 3: thing i feel really Fortunate is that i've been able.
44:24
Speaker 1: To do that you say that having a functioning body
44:27
Speaker 1: we take care of should be one.
44:29
Speaker 2: OF our jobs i like.
44:30
Speaker 1: How you put that in a world that often treats
44:33
Speaker 1: wellness as an indulgence.
44:36
Speaker 2: Or an option even what shaped that?
44:39
Speaker 3: MINDSET for you i think, coming through sport. It's really
44:42
Speaker 3: Simple let's say i've had a KNEE surgery while, i
44:45
Speaker 3: was competing and you can't get off the. Toilet by
44:48
Speaker 3: yourself let me tell you what you. Learn real quick oh,
44:51
Speaker 3: WAIT a Second i think i'm grateful for MY health
44:54
Speaker 3: and i need to get from, here to there AND
44:56
Speaker 3: right now i have A knee that i just READID
44:58
Speaker 3: and if i had to run out, OF the building.
45:00
Speaker 3: I barely could and so looking at it from a
45:02
Speaker 3: different point of view of understanding that the gift of
45:05
Speaker 3: health is it's hard to. Do anything else as people,
45:09
Speaker 3: who get headaches it's hard to, enjoy your family it's
45:12
Speaker 3: hard to be really good at your job if you.
45:14
Speaker 3: Don't feel good and so for me it seems logical
45:18
Speaker 3: and GOING back to i don't need to learn. The
45:20
Speaker 3: big lessons IT'S something that i incorporate and as females.
45:24
Speaker 3: WERE not taught i think men do a better, job,
45:26
Speaker 3: of like, Hey that's fun i'm going to. Go do
45:28
Speaker 3: that we somehow, IT'S like oh i have, to earn
45:30
Speaker 3: that or why are you going? To have, fun it's
45:32
Speaker 3: like what do you? Think is fun why don't you
45:34
Speaker 3: go find something that's fun. And do that and Also
45:37
Speaker 3: learning that i'm not being not as good as a
45:41
Speaker 3: mother or wife or employee OR boss, if, i say
45:46
Speaker 3: oh and, By the way i'm going to take. Care
45:50
Speaker 3: of myself, having said that women go get, their nails
45:53
Speaker 3: done they go get, their hair done they, clean their
45:55
Speaker 3: cars they, get new carpets they do. All this stuff
45:58
Speaker 3: they'd rather put a lot of things first then taking.
46:01
Speaker 3: Care of, themselves so really we. Have the time we
46:05
Speaker 3: just have to figure out that it is a part,
46:08
Speaker 3: of our LIFE not something i do OVER here when.
46:11
Speaker 3: I have time it's just part. Of the deal and.
46:14
Speaker 3: Consistency over quantity, if YOU say well i only have
46:18
Speaker 3: Great fifteen minutes i've, Had newborn Children it's like i've
46:20
Speaker 3: had six minute workouts. With no equation, it's just like
46:24
Speaker 3: you do what. You can do but, the thing is
46:26
Speaker 3: no one's going to come to. You and go, you
46:29
Speaker 3: know what why don't you go? Take a walk my
46:31
Speaker 3: husband's not going to. Come and go, you, Know what
46:32
Speaker 3: sweet i'll. Take over, all, it's like no you have
46:35
Speaker 3: to put the guardrails out and. Go, To everybody hey
46:37
Speaker 3: i'm taking thirty minutes unless, something's on fire. Don't bother
46:41
Speaker 3: me and what it looks like when your kids are
46:44
Speaker 3: teenagers versus new? Babies is different and is it hard to?
46:48
Speaker 2: Fit?
46:48
Speaker 3: It in yes do? You? Blow it yes do? You miss?
46:51
Speaker 3: Days of course do you? Eat, Chocolate cake sure but it's.
46:54
Speaker 3: Not about that it's eighty percent. Of the time are you?
46:56
Speaker 3: Getting it done don't make excuses and. It'll work out how.
47:01
Speaker 1: Much of your philosophy is based on? Science versus, INTUITION.
47:05
Speaker 3: You know i know so much of THE science, that,
47:07
Speaker 3: i go yeah because you want to do some of.
47:09
Speaker 3: The right things but the whole goal of living is
47:13
Speaker 3: to be in a deeper. Relationship with YOURSELF how, do
47:17
Speaker 3: i FEEL what? Do i BELIEVE what? Do i THINK what?
47:22
Speaker 3: Am i seeing and so when we farm, it all
47:25
Speaker 3: out sometimes we. Lose THAT connection so i really am deep.
47:29
Speaker 3: Into MY connection but i use science as, a reference
47:31
Speaker 3: like oh are? These best practices but you'll find that
47:35
Speaker 3: there's very few new. Things to incorporate once you understand
47:38
Speaker 3: kind of, how food works, how movement, works how, sleep,
47:41
Speaker 3: circadian rhythms sunlight how all, these things work it doesn't really.
47:45
Speaker 3: Change that much and, again our devices you can put
47:48
Speaker 3: a neuralink chip, in my head but pretty much, before
47:52
Speaker 3: that moment our biology.
47:54
Speaker 2: Is not different your approach has always.
47:56
Speaker 1: Been about Longevity from what i've seen and, heard you
47:59
Speaker 1: talk are there any unconventional wellness practices that?
48:03
Speaker 3: You swear by and the bonuses in technology are things like,
48:07
Speaker 3: real hyperbaric chambers, real red beds things. Like methylne blue
48:12
Speaker 3: there's these little extra kind of things you can do
48:15
Speaker 3: that if you have, a good practice these. Can support
48:18
Speaker 3: you if you don't, do the fundamentals it's just something,
48:21
Speaker 3: to occupy yourself to make yourself think. You're doing something it's.
48:25
Speaker 3: Still about work.
48:26
Speaker 2: Is that why You Guys. Created laired superfood it feels
48:29
Speaker 2: Like a fundamental.
48:30
Speaker 3: It's a happy. Accident number one and the Great Thing
48:33
Speaker 3: about laired superfood is this a lot of people. Already.
48:36
Speaker 3: Drinking coffee cool could you do something that you do
48:39
Speaker 3: every day? That supports You And so laired, superfood the
48:42
Speaker 3: ingredients the fact that it's fat, and caffeine together so
48:45
Speaker 3: you don't go like this, and like that you feel
48:47
Speaker 3: your body. And your brain so there's some principles baked
48:50
Speaker 3: into the company that, would be, like you know we put,
48:52
Speaker 3: adaptogens in there so through time it has a systemic
48:55
Speaker 3: effect on your overall. Health and wellbeing so the other side,
48:59
Speaker 3: Of it is i've learned that if we can find
49:03
Speaker 3: things where we're not asking you to do, one other
49:06
Speaker 3: thing what either can we take away that's keeping you
49:09
Speaker 3: from getting your goals or what are you already doing
49:12
Speaker 3: that you.
49:12
Speaker 2: Could do better it's hard to, change consumer behavior so
49:15
Speaker 2: you have.
49:15
Speaker 3: TO be additive, i THINK so And i think, laired
49:18
Speaker 3: in particular was only drinking coffee, and then, REALIZED oh
49:21
Speaker 3: wait i can use this practice as a way to
49:23
Speaker 3: put some other stuff in this, that for him his
49:27
Speaker 3: GOAL was now i can serve for FIVE hours because, i,
49:29
Speaker 3: use fat which, by the way, yak butter tea which is.
49:32
Speaker 3: An ancient practice none of, this, is new right people,
49:34
Speaker 3: Were doing that so nobody's. Reinventing the wheel but it's,
49:38
Speaker 3: sort of, saying oh okay we see, A lane here
49:41
Speaker 3: we've got an opportunity and we can bring these values,
49:45
Speaker 3: into this company and the, timing is right the, consumers informed,
49:48
Speaker 3: enough they're ready and it's something me. Feel good about
49:52
Speaker 3: i'm excited.
49:52
Speaker 1: TO try it i did not know that adding fat
49:54
Speaker 1: to caffeine helps You, not have.
49:56
Speaker 3: Yeah you, don't freak out you don't. Get the jitters
50:00
Speaker 3: be a really quick. TOTORY about coffee i didn't. Start
50:02
Speaker 3: drinking coffee tot was forty five until we started this business.
50:05
Speaker 3: TEN years ago. I like caffeine i just didn't like to.
50:08
Speaker 3: Taste of coffee and so when We Created, A larry
50:10
Speaker 3: super larry, would be, like try. This try THAT so
50:13
Speaker 3: what i do is basically a couple shots of espresso,
50:15
Speaker 3: in hot chocolate pretty. Much, with FATS however what i
50:18
Speaker 3: will say is when people, do drip coffee that's like
50:21
Speaker 3: three shots of espresso. Worth a caffeine so everybody thinks
50:25
Speaker 3: a shot, has more. Caffeine it doesn't they think dark roast,
50:28
Speaker 3: has more. Caffeine it doesn't medium roast. Has more caffeine
50:33
Speaker 3: so when something is roasted more or drip, sitting there longer.
50:37
Speaker 3: That's more coffee so what happens you do, black drip.
50:40
Speaker 3: Coffee that's acidic, it's been sitting you, Have no fat
50:43
Speaker 3: you're getting, a stomach ache, you're jacked up you. Get
50:46
Speaker 3: the shakes so by doing a dark roast or espresso,
50:49
Speaker 3: in the fat you have a. Little less caffeine it
50:53
Speaker 3: probably is. Not as acidic and then you put the
50:56
Speaker 3: fat and it binds with the caffeine and it goes slower.
51:00
Speaker 3: Into your system what's.
51:01
Speaker 2: Your philosophy on?
51:02
Speaker 3: Having, a scale oh a scale? You, away yourself yeah it.
51:06
Speaker 3: COMES and goes i use it, as a reference but
51:09
Speaker 3: this goes back TO how? Do i FEEL how do i?
51:11
Speaker 3: Look in THERE how? Do i look how do? My
51:13
Speaker 3: clothes feel how's? My energy LEVELS how? Am i sleeping this.
51:16
Speaker 3: Is first principles now, is it, like oh WELL why
51:19
Speaker 3: am i consistently gaining? These extra pounds? What's going on is?
51:22
Speaker 3: My stress high because by the way that'll put, the
51:24
Speaker 3: weight on you could have. The same practice you could
51:26
Speaker 3: be changing age and you need to tweak something. Here
51:30
Speaker 3: and there so if you can use it as, an,
51:32
Speaker 3: Objective reference fine if it's something that you use that,
51:36
Speaker 3: JUST torments you i would say that torment is actually
51:39
Speaker 3: having a negative impact, on your physiology that it's. Not
51:43
Speaker 3: worth it the other thing is people aren't. Honest with
51:45
Speaker 3: themselves even, when, They think oh i'm going To track,
51:47
Speaker 3: what i'm eating they usually under report unless they're writing
51:50
Speaker 3: it down twenty five percent of the amount of calories
51:52
Speaker 3: they're intaking because they forgot about oh that ONE little
51:55
Speaker 3: thing i shoved in my mouth or. Things like THAT
51:57
Speaker 3: so what i want to say TO people is i
52:00
Speaker 3: approach it with both one hundred percent, accountability and grace
52:03
Speaker 3: because if you, don't have grace you're just kicking. Your
52:06
Speaker 3: own ass so you want to, give yourself grace but, don't,
52:09
Speaker 3: bullshit yourself, like be. Honest be straight are you? Doing
52:13
Speaker 3: the work are you? Eating the thing are you out
52:15
Speaker 3: with the? Girls having, martini it's, LIKE come on i
52:17
Speaker 3: want to. Look like, that it's like do you? Want
52:19
Speaker 3: to really do you want to?
52:20
Speaker 2: Do the work do you talk to your? Girls?
52:21
Speaker 3: Like this yes but way down in the conversation it's
52:27
Speaker 3: usually pretty, loving and, nurturing pretty direct but from. A
52:30
Speaker 3: loving PLACE and then i might get to A place, where,
52:33
Speaker 3: i GO hey can i say something to you and
52:37
Speaker 3: not as your mom but as a PERSON like and
52:39
Speaker 3: i try to couch it in a way that they
52:41
Speaker 3: can then explore that. Idea for themselves.
52:44
Speaker 2: My mom talks to me like she doesn't tweeting.
52:47
Speaker 1: It at.
52:47
Speaker 3: All, she doesn't.
52:48
Speaker 1: NO it's interesting i think it's a, blessing, and occurs well.
52:52
Speaker 3: JUST depends because i have kind of such a direct
52:54
Speaker 3: tone all, THE time already i really try to keep
52:58
Speaker 3: SOFTENING things because i am, there only MOM and so
53:02
Speaker 3: i want to.
53:02
Speaker 1: Be their mom i've heard you talk about. Softening your,
53:05
Speaker 1: EDGES oh yeah.
53:07
Speaker 3: I need to i'm getting better at sort of realizing.
53:09
Speaker 3: Like it's okay one of my driving forces in my
53:14
Speaker 3: LIFE is like i would like to be, a decent
53:16
Speaker 3: person and so that requires being. Kind and loving AND
53:21
Speaker 3: just because, i can, take you know the brute, force
53:23
Speaker 3: and like oh, grind it out doesn't mean everybody else is.
53:26
Speaker 3: Operating that WAY and so i try to take that
53:29
Speaker 3: Into account when i'm. Communicating with people, and you, Know
53:34
Speaker 3: funny enough i've EVEN said sometimes i think about this,
53:37
Speaker 3: on My podcast, where i'm, Like you know i'm not
53:39
Speaker 3: going to tell you. What to do i'll invite you.
53:41
Speaker 3: All dose, stuff AND finally sometimes i, want to say and,
53:43
Speaker 3: BY the way i don't care if, you Do it because,
53:46
Speaker 3: I'm doing it like if you want to do. IT
53:48
Speaker 3: for yourself i, think it's GREAT but what i really feel, inside,
53:51
Speaker 3: is like okay. That's ON you so i think part of, me,
53:56
Speaker 3: is like hey, I'll be here i'll. Be with you let's.
53:59
Speaker 3: Do it together and then at, a certain point if,
54:01
Speaker 3: you're not. Ready it's cool.
54:03
Speaker 2: Did you like being? A professional athlete are you happy?
54:06
Speaker 2: WITH the path i.
54:07
Speaker 3: Feel really, fortunate you know this IS one thing i want.
54:10
Speaker 3: To remind people your life will find you no matter
54:13
Speaker 3: what if you just keep following your voice, and your
54:17
Speaker 3: instinct and when, the door's open even, if you're scared if,
54:20
Speaker 3: you go through your life's going. To find you because
54:23
Speaker 3: if you said to, me at fifteen as a Kid
54:25
Speaker 3: from THE caribbean that i would have gone and played
54:28
Speaker 3: volleyball and as a college athlete, and a professional it
54:33
Speaker 3: was never. In THE cards never i should have worked at.
54:36
Speaker 3: A gift shop THAT'S probably what i thought was. GOING
54:38
Speaker 3: to happen i didn't have an idea about having an
54:42
Speaker 3: opportunity to be in a long marriage or be in
54:45
Speaker 3: A workspace where i could TALK about something i really love.
54:49
Speaker 3: AND believe, In, i thought okay we'll. See WHAT happens
54:52
Speaker 3: so i think that's something really, important for people no
54:55
Speaker 3: matter where, you come from no matter where even who
54:59
Speaker 3: wronged you or what didn't work. Out for you if you're,
55:03
Speaker 3: willing to work if you're willing to listen, to your
55:05
Speaker 3: voice if you're willing to be honest with yourself and
55:08
Speaker 3: go through the doors, when you're scared your life finds
55:11
Speaker 3: you in all the ways your. Partner finds you if that's,
55:15
Speaker 3: what you want. That's the thing you don't have to
55:18
Speaker 3: want that that doesn't. Make us complete but if that's,
55:21
Speaker 3: what you want. It'll find you your. Life finds, you
55:24
Speaker 3: it does. It finds you it's. There for us we just.
55:28
Speaker 3: Have to trust and it is. Scary AND hard and
55:30
Speaker 3: i can sit here with three daughters and a husband
55:33
Speaker 3: and all this rhetoric of the, resume behind ME and
55:36
Speaker 3: as i go one step in front, of the other, It's,
55:39
Speaker 3: still like okay that's. What we're doing, we're in school
55:43
Speaker 3: that's what we're, doing down here and we're. Loving EACH
55:45
Speaker 3: other and i think we make it really complicated when
55:48
Speaker 3: you have a little kid and they're going from one
55:50
Speaker 3: room to the next and they run like if they're
55:52
Speaker 3: like two and, a half three and you're not worried
55:54
Speaker 3: that they're about, to, eat it right and when you,
55:57
Speaker 3: listen to that or you sit at a table with
56:00
Speaker 3: people you love and you listen to like laughter and
56:03
Speaker 3: food and, things like that or you're going to bed
56:06
Speaker 3: at night and everyone's in the house and everyone's safe.
56:09
Speaker 3: And it's good it's not much. More than that now
56:13
Speaker 3: we do all these other things, to entertain us to
56:16
Speaker 3: challenge us to, have creative. Expression that's great but what
56:20
Speaker 3: life is really about. Is so simple and if we
56:23
Speaker 3: can keep those two things space for, both of, them
56:27
Speaker 3: you know it's, like a tree right they say the,
56:29
Speaker 3: roots go deep but why? Not how high and why can?
56:33
Speaker 3: The BRANCHES go and i really think that stay grounded
56:36
Speaker 3: and then reach for whatever it is that you feel
56:38
Speaker 3: inspired to reach for and be willing to kind of,
56:42
Speaker 3: Eat shit on like are you willing every day to
56:46
Speaker 3: stand up and wake up for those relationships? And that
56:49
Speaker 3: dream and, if you are then. Go for. It that's
56:51
Speaker 3: good and, if you're not if you're just doing it
56:53
Speaker 3: because someone your parents, think you should or you have a,
56:55
Speaker 3: boss or whatever it's not the way because even, when
56:59
Speaker 3: it's good. It's still challenging and that.
57:02
Speaker 2: Was so beautiful thank, you, For, that well.
57:05
Speaker 3: Yeah that's, just you know, live FIVE minutes and i
57:07
Speaker 3: think most PEOPLE know that i.
57:09
Speaker 2: Have some rapid. Fire, for You okay.
57:12
Speaker 3: The queen of question time for.
57:15
Speaker 2: You has laired got you?
57:17
Speaker 3: Into the, ocean oh yeah my mother TRAINED dolphins when i.
57:21
Speaker 3: Was a kid it's, a WEIRD thing but i grew
57:23
Speaker 3: Up In. The virgin, Island but yes. I've gone surfing
57:26
Speaker 3: laird's got me. In THE ocean but i think the
57:28
Speaker 3: thing that connects us is nature and water. And island
57:33
Speaker 3: mentality if.
57:34
Speaker 1: You had five dollars to invest, in your health what's
57:37
Speaker 1: a healthy decision?
57:38
Speaker 3: You, can make oh just save your money and go.
57:40
Speaker 3: To bed early you're not going to get anything. For
57:42
Speaker 3: five dollars how?
57:43
Speaker 2: About fifty bucks if you have.
57:45
Speaker 3: Not trained and you don't know, how to train either
57:48
Speaker 3: buy it online or hire somebody to teach you a
57:51
Speaker 3: couple things so you get comfortable, and, YOU know okay i.
57:54
Speaker 2: Can start there how about five thousand?
57:56
Speaker 3: Dollars for me the money isn't going to get you where.
57:58
Speaker 3: You want. To gounless you we need to go to
58:00
Speaker 3: a therapist and understand why you. Haven't done it cheapest
58:04
Speaker 3: thing every day. You wake UP first thing i used
58:07
Speaker 3: to say, if you said, What's the order it's a
58:08
Speaker 3: nutrition movement community. All, these things okay, Sunlight is first
58:15
Speaker 3: so blue light non. Native blue light so the blue
58:19
Speaker 3: light that comes from our phones and our computers and
58:23
Speaker 3: all the EMFs and, all the LEDs that is hurting
58:26
Speaker 3: our health and our spirit in a way that. We
58:28
Speaker 3: don't understand so if you can wake up every day and,
58:30
Speaker 3: look at sunlight even if you live, in a city
58:33
Speaker 3: you set. Your, body up okay your melatonin gets released,
58:37
Speaker 3: through your eyeball, tells, your body hey in, about fourteen hours.
58:40
Speaker 3: Release your melatonin it sets. Your, circadian rhythm sunlight don't,
58:45
Speaker 3: snack so much shorten, your eating window and try to
58:48
Speaker 3: move and. Huff and PUFF that's. What i say. Twice
58:51
Speaker 3: a week move in a way that you huff and.
58:53
Speaker 2: Puff something you absolutely have. No patience.
58:56
Speaker 3: FOR go off i just don't like. The victim mentality
59:00
Speaker 3: if we, want to say. It's not fair you know there's,
59:02
Speaker 3: an old saying if, you want fair go. To the
59:04
Speaker 3: fairground life. Is not fair i'm not smart enough. To
59:08
Speaker 3: UNDERSTAND why all i can do is control this right
59:11
Speaker 3: here and go what Are the? Things i'm Doing i'm
59:14
Speaker 3: saying I'm thinking and I'M believing that i can participate
59:17
Speaker 3: in making this THE way that. I WANT it and i,
59:20
Speaker 3: Don't like bullies so victim mentality and bullying in the
59:27
Speaker 3: sense of real bullying because you can because that person. Won't,
59:30
Speaker 3: fight back now if you're a bully and you, Pick another,
59:32
Speaker 3: bully i'm. Down no problem those two things. REALLY tweak
59:36
Speaker 3: me i.
59:37
Speaker 1: Love your podcast what's the first episode that you would?
59:40
Speaker 2: Point someone to it just.
59:41
Speaker 3: Depends what, you're INTERESTED in because i have really sciencey
59:44
Speaker 3: people if. YOU'RE into that i have a lot of.
59:46
Speaker 3: Mental health people so if you want to talk more,
59:48
Speaker 3: ABOUT mental health i, have some big muscle heady guys that.
59:51
Speaker 3: Talk about science so it's really what. YOU'RE interested in
59:54
Speaker 3: i have a lot. Of great guests it's more, about
59:57
Speaker 3: you know people are drawn to things in their life because.
1:00:01
Speaker 3: They're wrestling, it and, so for example most MENTAL health people,
1:00:05
Speaker 3: i talk to they're still trying To figure out most relationship,
1:00:08
Speaker 3: experts guess what they're trying to. Figure OUT relationships so
1:00:11
Speaker 3: i think it's also understanding the thing that we're intrigued
1:00:14
Speaker 3: in is the problem we're still. TRYING to solve i just.
1:00:17
Speaker 1: LEARNED that lesson i had a therapist who basically asked me.
1:00:21
Speaker 1: MY deepest fear i came, up with loneliness, and, she
1:00:23
Speaker 1: goes oh that's so interesting because you've built a whole career.
1:00:26
Speaker 2: Out of connection which is the antidote? Or the opposite?
1:00:30
Speaker 2: What was yours it's.
1:00:31
Speaker 3: A great question i think my thing has, always been
1:00:37
Speaker 3: like do, it really well, be really good never separate
1:00:41
Speaker 3: because you're, a. TEAM player right i come, From a team, so,
1:00:44
Speaker 3: pursue excellence grind do, all the stuff but don't take,
1:00:47
Speaker 3: too much space don't take. Too much air that's even
1:00:51
Speaker 3: interesting Being. MARRIED to laired a Lot of times i'm
1:00:53
Speaker 3: Happy to elevate laired. And BE behind so i, think
1:00:56
Speaker 3: for me it's more about kind of don't, worry about
1:00:58
Speaker 3: it follow you, want to do and don't govern it too.
1:01:03
Speaker 2: Much and quite literally.
1:01:04
Speaker 3: Take UP space Yeah i know i'm. DOING it already
1:01:07
Speaker 3: i might as well do it.
1:01:08
Speaker 2: All the way one thing every woman.
1:01:09
Speaker 3: SHOULD try once i just think as you get older,
1:01:13
Speaker 3: as a woman you should try more than once. To
1:01:17
Speaker 3: BE silly and, i don't, mean you know Drunk on
1:01:20
Speaker 3: a wednesday and a. GIRL'S night out, i mean like
1:01:23
Speaker 3: don't let it all bury you because it can the.
1:01:27
Speaker 3: Details OF life? Am i perfect, just be, silly be
1:01:32
Speaker 3: playful and use your life's experience to give, you more freedom.
1:01:37
Speaker 3: Not confine you.
1:01:38
Speaker 1: What's a book you've read that changed your mind or
1:01:41
Speaker 1: changed your life that you think. Everybody, Could read.
1:01:43
Speaker 3: Well i've read a lot of books that have changed
1:01:46
Speaker 3: my mind about a. Lot of things one of them
1:01:49
Speaker 3: was that, was really helpful especially navigating some, things about
1:01:52
Speaker 3: parenting which then bled across to everything was A Book
1:01:56
Speaker 3: by Byron Katie, Called the work and she, Has four questions?
1:01:59
Speaker 3: Is IT true can i know?
1:02:00
Speaker 1: To be?
1:02:00
Speaker 3: True for SURE who? AM i want i? Think those
1:02:02
Speaker 3: thoughts AND who would i be? Without THAT belief and
1:02:05
Speaker 3: i think for all of us this idea? Of the
1:02:07
Speaker 3: narrative do we live? By our narratives and if we
1:02:12
Speaker 3: can get out of that from? Time to time and
1:02:14
Speaker 3: she talks about past futuring. NOT doing that i think
1:02:17
Speaker 3: that was really a great starting. POINT for me i
1:02:20
Speaker 3: could apply that, to my business to, my love life to,
1:02:23
Speaker 3: my fitness life to my relationship, with my children and.
1:02:27
Speaker 1: It's, really liberating, hey last question grab a Card From
1:02:31
Speaker 1: the question everything card game whicheveryone calls.
1:02:33
Speaker 3: You question everything, here you go how would you describe yourself? To,
1:02:38
Speaker 3: a stranger, oh my gosh is?
1:02:40
Speaker 1: That?
1:02:40
Speaker 3: For real. Consistent so boring i'll tell, you, one thing
1:02:44
Speaker 3: really and we'll end. THIS with this i went and
1:02:47
Speaker 3: saw a guy recently and he, Said, to me gabby
1:02:51
Speaker 3: you know you've been using your. Legs for everything, up, the,
1:02:54
Speaker 3: hill grind, Step stop, grind he goes why don't you try?
1:02:57
Speaker 3: Using YOUR wings and i think sometimes we, work so
1:03:00
Speaker 3: hard we get mired. In the details we're trying to show,
1:03:02
Speaker 3: up for everybody but sometimes if we can give ourselves permission.
1:03:08
Speaker 2: To let it thank, you for that thank you, for
1:03:11
Speaker 2: joining us thank you.
1:03:12
Speaker 3: For, having me.
1:03:18
Speaker 2: Okay you know what.
1:03:19
Speaker 1: Time it is today's, a good day to have. A
1:03:22
Speaker 1: good day i'll see. You next week