Latest / Son of a Boy Dad / Encyclopedia Brown | Son of a Boy Dad #281 ft. Dana Beers

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Encyclopedia Brown | Son of a Boy Dad #281 ft. Dana Beers · Son of a Boy Dad

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hey Son of a Boy Dad listeners. You can find
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  Speaker 4: will do fun things.
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  Speaker 1: You're about to be a blast. Okay, great, I'm about
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: to have a blast. I feel good. Okay, I'm happy
• 2:47
  Speaker 1: to be talking to you.
• 2:47
  Speaker 7: Me too.
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: You're the guy I want to be talking to you. Oh,
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: this is going to be such an ick, Yes, God.
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  Speaker 4: An equal sharing of the ball.
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  Speaker 8: your scorecard shakes out.
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: And he said, hey, what's going on there, pal?
• 3:24
  Speaker 4: We saw you in the hockey game. Ark, I know
• 3:26
  Speaker 4: you guys.
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: I'm Ryan Whitney.
• 3:27
  Speaker 4: I got a drink named after me, Pink Whitney. That's
• 3:31
  Speaker 4: what I thought.
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: See it, Fellas, I invented the thing you pigeoned Pink
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: Whitney for legendary moments after one.
• 3:41
  Speaker 4: Okay, well, depending on how we're going, I might just
• 3:44
  Speaker 4: give him the old police officer pulling the bike bike
• 3:49
  Speaker 4: guy over.
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, totally. You know what I realized about that bike
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: story that uh, the cops have to give out more
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: tickets because there's no cars to give the tickets to.
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: That's what I didn't realize.
• 4:01
  Speaker 4: That's exactly right. Sound of a boy dad speaking up?
• 4:05
  Speaker 4: Is my ticket up here somewhere? I think I left
• 4:08
  Speaker 4: it up here? Okay, well, anyway, let's get into it.
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: Son of a boy Dad. Welcome to Son of a
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: boy Dad. It's me and Francis today. Because Sas is
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: super duper sick.
• 4:20
  Speaker 4: You do the clap that he does.
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: Okay, you do it? No, no, no, I'm not equipped.
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: Wow that was nice. Uh, let's call I'm gonna call
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: Sas just so we can one prove that he's sick. Yeah,
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: and two just to get a wellness check. And his
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: voice on the episode satisfy as contract to Dave.
• 4:39
  Speaker 4: It's good thinking. Cover his bases.
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: Yo, brother, what's up? Yeah, you're a life to tape
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: on son of a boy, Dad, got it? How do
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: you feel?
• 4:55
  Speaker 8: Uh?
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  Speaker 3: Not good?
• 4:57
  Speaker 4: Did you hear the pause in between him answering it
• 4:59
  Speaker 4: was and he lowered his voice or register to try
• 5:02
  Speaker 4: to make it sound more sickly.
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: When he when he like kind of got everybody in
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: his apartment and shushed them.
• 5:08
  Speaker 4: Yes, yes, yes, yes exactly.
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: He's like kept behind the kept on the curtain. Yeah,
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: pretend that you're not here because you're really having a
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: probably some kind of freak off.
• 5:16
  Speaker 4: Yeah. He stepped behind the employee's only door at Dave
• 5:20
  Speaker 4: and Busters.
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but he's still You can hear him slurping on
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: some Dave and Buster's party cut pizza, A thin ass slice,
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: an inch wide slice of pizza.
• 5:35
  Speaker 7: You guys got nothing else to talk about.
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: We're just calling because we just wanted to. We wanted
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: to give you your chance to be on the show
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: because you're that. The text you sent this morning was
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: just fucking preposterous, saying that you were going to call
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: Dave and tell him that you weren't going to be
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: on today.
• 5:54
  Speaker 4: I don't think that's that crazy. I've done that every time.
• 5:56
  Speaker 4: You shouldn't be doing that.
• 5:59
  Speaker 5: I mean, I don't miss a lot of episodes.
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: But what is Dave? What does Dave say when you
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: call him? He just says, okay, yeah. I don't think
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: he cares call him.
• 6:10
  Speaker 9: I don't call him.
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: I text him. I just don't think you have to
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: call him. I think that one you're on this episode
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: and to me and Francis, we have your fucking back, dude,
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: We'll we'll protect you.
• 6:22
  Speaker 7: I don't need protection.
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: Unless it's from a virus of sorts. What's your symptoms
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: right now? The most intense body inches anyone has ever had.
• 6:35
  Speaker 4: Hey, SaaS, let me let me ask you something. So
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  Speaker 4: I got home quite late last night after taking two
• 6:40
  Speaker 4: flights from Myrtle Beach in order to make the episode.
• 6:43
  Speaker 4: And my question would be, you know I texted everyone
• 6:46
  Speaker 4: at about twelve thirty, and you responded, if you're super sick,
• 6:50
  Speaker 4: don't you think it would behoove you to go to
• 6:52
  Speaker 4: bed early. I've been sleeping the entire day. Oh so
• 6:56
  Speaker 4: you're just off off schedule. Yeah, I mean I was
• 7:00
  Speaker 4: probably awake from like I mean, I probably.
• 7:03
  Speaker 2: Went to bed right after that.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: Have you played any video games while you've been sick?
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  Speaker 4: I played video games yesterday for a little bit. I
• 7:11
  Speaker 4: didn't play the day before.
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: But it's like we're barely even playing.
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  Speaker 7: It's not fun.
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  Speaker 1: It's just like I played for Like what happens is
• 7:19
  Speaker 1: I'll take a bunch of tile and all in thatvill.
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  Speaker 4: And then I'll be like, I'm not even sick anymore.
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  Speaker 4: And then I'll play like one game.
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  Speaker 3: Of Call of Duty and then I'll be like, I'm
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  Speaker 3: gonna fucking kill myself.
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: War as hell. I feel you, bro, But thank you
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: for just even checking in. And me and uh Me
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  Speaker 1: and Francis. We're gonna hold it down. We're gonna have
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: some nice conversations in your stead. Anything you want us
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: to talk about the Retart Choice Awards or anything.
• 7:46
  Speaker 4: No, just don't talk about wine or plays.
• 7:52
  Speaker 1: Wine or plays. I did actually see oh Mary this week?
• 7:57
  Speaker 4: Oh you did?
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: Yeah? I did. We want to talk about it. We
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: won't to talk about it bice as feel better, Feel better, brother, But.
• 8:08
  Speaker 4: Yeah, he doesn't sound great. He sounds like he's using
• 8:10
  Speaker 4: one of those drug dealer sixty minute voice modulators.
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  Speaker 1: I actually feel really shit right now. I could barely
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  Speaker 1: play video games for six hours today. The fact that
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: he's playing video games does hurt his case a little bit,
• 8:25
  Speaker 1: and that.
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  Speaker 4: He realizes there's a direct correlation between him starting to
• 8:29
  Speaker 4: play video games and immediately feeling worse.
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: Yeah, he doesn't have to play video games. No, he's addicted.
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  Speaker 1: I think.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah, he's got a problem.
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: He also should be going to bed at like fucking
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: nine o'clock, doesn't matter how early he woke up, right,
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: Just go to bed, sleep it off. Yeah, he just
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: can't fucking beat it. Whatever. You're here, brother, and I'm
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: happy to see you. Where are you coming back from
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: the road.
• 8:51
  Speaker 4: I was in Myrtle Beach for for Play. We did
• 8:55
  Speaker 4: the Barcel Classic, and then we had to do a
• 8:57
  Speaker 4: qualifier for the Creator Classic, which is next Wednesday, where
• 9:02
  Speaker 4: a bunch of you know, sort of YouTube golf people
• 9:05
  Speaker 4: get invited to play TPC Sawgrass, which is in Jacksonville.
• 9:10
  Speaker 4: It's famous for its island green that you've probably seen.
• 9:13
  Speaker 4: I think they call it the fifth Major. It's the
• 9:18
  Speaker 4: it's the biggest, probably the biggest tournament in terms of
• 9:23
  Speaker 4: attention money. I think it's the biggest money tournament outside
• 9:28
  Speaker 4: of the Majors. And uh, the boys are going down
• 9:32
  Speaker 4: and and the point is that this Creator Classic thing.
• 9:35
  Speaker 4: Clearly the PGA has realized the value of YouTube golf personalities.
• 9:39
  Speaker 4: People like the good good guys Rick Shields.
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: Uh, page Page obviously they need to respect page as
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: golf acumen.
• 9:49
  Speaker 4: Paige Sparanak. And then there's a few others that have
• 9:53
  Speaker 4: become quite the Brian Brothers who are actually really really good.
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: Uh.
• 9:58
  Speaker 4: And so Barstool was offered one slot to send one
• 10:02
  Speaker 4: of our guys down, and it's next Wednesday, and that
• 10:07
  Speaker 4: person gets to play in this Creator Classic, which is
• 10:09
  Speaker 4: to play the course the day before the tournament starts.
• 10:12
  Speaker 1: Who's who's going.
• 10:13
  Speaker 4: I won't say yet because I don't think that has come.
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: Out, but someone from the four play family is going.
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: One of us is going, what wow, what the fuck?
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: I mean, there's some absolute sticks in the four play world.
• 10:27
  Speaker 4: Yeah, well, you know what, I don't think it's spoiling
• 10:30
  Speaker 4: too much to say it's not me.
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: Oh, damn it. What the fuck that sucks? It's not
• 10:34
  Speaker 1: I was positive.
• 10:37
  Speaker 4: No, I tried to be coy to throw everyone off
• 10:40
  Speaker 4: the scent, but it is not me. My game is
• 10:43
  Speaker 4: not really. I haven't played since the end of October.
• 10:49
  Speaker 4: I have not really. The only other playing I did
• 10:52
  Speaker 4: was our fitting that we did in January out and
• 10:55
  Speaker 4: you know, California and.
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: I maybe you haven't been hungover enough. Sas said that
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: it's known that golfers play their best when they're hungover.
• 11:03
  Speaker 4: Is that why he's been so bad since he's been sober?
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: I guess so, I guess so it's a performance decreasing
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: lack of drugs that he has coursing through his veins
• 11:14
  Speaker 1: right now.
• 11:15
  Speaker 4: Is it hangovers or is it two drinks in? That's
• 11:19
  Speaker 4: where I tend to play the best. It's to drinks.
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: He said that when you're hungover or sick, you just
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: feel so fucking shitty, and that's all you can think about.
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: That you don't even concentrate on your golf game. You
• 11:28
  Speaker 1: don't overthink anything. You just hit him straight.
• 11:32
  Speaker 4: Well, that it's hangovers. I get anxious, and anxiety is
• 11:38
  Speaker 4: the thing that makes my golf become quite erratic. So
• 11:43
  Speaker 4: I need whatever I can to quiet the mind. Dude.
• 11:45
  Speaker 4: We were we were hosting the Classic, and these two guys,
• 11:50
  Speaker 4: this team came up to the tea box when I
• 11:53
  Speaker 4: was with Dana riding around in the cart and.
• 11:56
  Speaker 1: On two wheels.
• 11:57
  Speaker 4: Yes, exactly, every turn, loued a giant fucking rock divot
• 12:03
  Speaker 4: into the path, just a moat around whatever.
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah, car path. Because he's fat. We will give him
• 12:11
  Speaker 1: a chance to defend these about himself.
• 12:15
  Speaker 4: And these guys. Wedding coming up too, and he's just
• 12:17
  Speaker 4: going in the wrong direction and.
• 12:19
  Speaker 1: He's just doing all the wrong thing. He's like creating
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: video series where he has to put calories in his
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: body to like Woo Stone Cold Steve Austin. Yeah right,
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: like Woo country singers like why you're getting married? You
• 12:32
  Speaker 1: have like a great life ahead you. You're moving to Chicago. Actually,
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: that's probably why he's probably trying to beef up.
• 12:37
  Speaker 4: Is he moving to Chicago?
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: I assume I know they've been putting the press on him.
• 12:42
  Speaker 4: Wow, I didn't know that. That's sad. I'd be sad
• 12:46
  Speaker 4: to lose him.
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah, what the fuck? Maybe we can fly him out
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: every single week.
• 12:50
  Speaker 4: Man, Well, I guess that'll be the end of that series.
• 12:52
  Speaker 4: I did what I do with him? Just another fucking
• 12:57
  Speaker 4: well we did. We've done like thirty episodes. I can't
• 13:00
  Speaker 4: call this one a total stop, start stop.
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: Why don't you just have them come out and record
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: a bunch of episodes. There's shows where people fly out.
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: Casey Smith flies out to do the college football show,
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: Tommy Smokes flies out to do the pro football show.
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: Like Dana could fly back here and do this show
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: with you.
• 13:17
  Speaker 4: I suppose so KB are going.
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: To fly back and do Game Night every month.
• 13:21
  Speaker 4: Right, that's exactly right. It's hard enough to get us
• 13:26
  Speaker 4: to do it when we both live in the same
• 13:28
  Speaker 4: place and work out of the same office. The idea
• 13:32
  Speaker 4: they'll be back buying two airplane seats to come here is.
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: Alone.
• 13:38
  Speaker 4: Yeah. Oh, speaking of okay beef, barstool beef. What do
• 13:46
  Speaker 4: you mean speaking of golf?
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: Oh?
• 13:48
  Speaker 4: Okay, wonderful guy, gentleman, gentleman, the class of a southern
• 13:54
  Speaker 4: sort of plantation owner.
• 13:56
  Speaker 1: When we don't have like our sou guys that we
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: have working at barstore like they're field workers.
• 14:07
  Speaker 4: Yeah, they're the brothers in that first scene from Django Toothless,
• 14:14
  Speaker 4: ill kept.
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: Brothers that's Mint and Brandon Walker.
• 14:18
  Speaker 4: That he shoots riding across the field.
• 14:21
  Speaker 1: Yes, exactly.
• 14:23
  Speaker 4: Well, anyway, this guy is a true gentleman. He is,
• 14:26
  Speaker 4: but he's not from the South, I don't, I don't think.
• 14:29
  Speaker 4: But anyway, class act through and through. We get on
• 14:34
  Speaker 4: the plane. Look, it's it's no secret that Beef is large.
• 14:40
  Speaker 4: I don't think it's cruel to say that. He acknowledges it.
• 14:43
  Speaker 4: I think that is Beef right. He's a big boy,
• 14:48
  Speaker 4: and I'm not mocking him for that. For some reason,
• 14:50
  Speaker 4: he's just one of those guys you don't you don't
• 14:53
  Speaker 4: want to make jokes about his weight.
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: Well, some guys are so damn nice.
• 14:58
  Speaker 4: He's too nice. He's too sweet about it. So I'm
• 15:01
  Speaker 4: not mocking in for that. However, we got on this
• 15:04
  Speaker 4: small plane we had we had to come up. We're
• 15:07
  Speaker 4: already talking plane talk. Sorry, small plane talk. Look quick quick,
• 15:11
  Speaker 4: little dip hotel. We're gonna dip hotee and some mayor travel.
• 15:15
  Speaker 4: We do change our flights to come a day earlier,
• 15:17
  Speaker 4: since there's bad weather happening today and I worried I
• 15:20
  Speaker 4: wouldn't be able to get home if we kept our
• 15:22
  Speaker 4: original flights In time to record, which would have left
• 15:25
  Speaker 4: you high and dry, especially without sass. So I got
• 15:31
  Speaker 4: we got out. We raced to the airport. It was
• 15:34
  Speaker 4: pretty funny, you know. We were scared of the time
• 15:37
  Speaker 4: getting our bags into checking in time. Two wheels get
• 15:40
  Speaker 4: to the airport. Beef was not in our car. It
• 15:43
  Speaker 4: was me, Frankie and Trent driving to the airport and
• 15:48
  Speaker 4: we get on our first flight. We had to do
• 15:50
  Speaker 4: two flights home for myrtle, which is you know, not far.
• 15:54
  Speaker 4: We had to fly to Charlotte, which was thirty five minutes,
• 15:56
  Speaker 4: and then we had to fly to New York. On
• 15:59
  Speaker 4: the flight to Charlotte, which which is one of those
• 16:00
  Speaker 4: very small planes, I think Sas called it a double XYZ,
• 16:05
  Speaker 4: you know, four hundred or whatever.
• 16:07
  Speaker 7: Course, and he was wrong.
• 16:09
  Speaker 4: It's wrong about the model of the plane.
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: But he shamed you for not being able to know it.
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: And that's literally his autistic fixation. It's not your autistic fixation.
• 16:17
  Speaker 4: If you're gonna be autistic, you better get it right.
• 16:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah, do it right. Nothing so unimpressive to be like
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: the autistic guy who can draw a whole city after
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: seeing it once and the city looks like shit.
• 16:27
  Speaker 4: Yeah, dude, nothing more less impressive than a guy who
• 16:31
  Speaker 4: claims autism and then fumbles his.
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: Math, right, like saying the whole Mets lineup from nineteen
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: fifty eight and then getting it wrong.
• 16:38
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm mixing a few NBA players in there.
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you have to be able to do it all right.
• 16:42
  Speaker 4: It's that to me that that is claiming false autism.
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: It's false flagging.
• 16:48
  Speaker 4: It's false flagging. Yeah.
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: But anyway, so real autistic people should be able to
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: run down on you and be like like gang members whatever.
• 16:59
  Speaker 4: Create I agree with that and say things like you
• 17:03
  Speaker 4: don't know how hard we worked for the prestige we
• 17:07
  Speaker 4: have with our high powered brains. Yes, for you to
• 17:11
  Speaker 4: come in here and claim us and then get your
• 17:16
  Speaker 4: easy bath wrong easy jets, Like that's the jets, are
• 17:21
  Speaker 4: you know? That's got to be that's elementary school autism.
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's.
• 17:28
  Speaker 4: One step above from you go from trains to planes
• 17:34
  Speaker 4: to I don't know what would come after that. What's
• 17:39
  Speaker 4: the green belts of autism?
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: It's probably uh, politics, probably.
• 17:47
  Speaker 4: State capitals maybe.
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, like geo guess or yeah right, people who
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: are just dropping.
• 17:53
  Speaker 4: A pin then algebra two.
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah. But weirdly, I don't know, I do a lot
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: of Does autism just line up with being good at mass?
• 18:03
  Speaker 4: That's the thing they seem to be the best at.
• 18:05
  Speaker 4: Did you ever read that book The Curious Case of
• 18:07
  Speaker 4: the Dog in the Nighttime?
• 18:08
  Speaker 1: Oh God, maybe.
• 18:09
  Speaker 4: It's a curious incident of the dog at nighttime?
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: No, what's it about?
• 18:11
  Speaker 4: Do you guys read that book? It's pretty good. It
• 18:16
  Speaker 4: was a novel that was written about a young boy
• 18:18
  Speaker 4: who has autism and witnesses the death of a dog,
• 18:26
  Speaker 4: or he finds the dog has been killed and it's
• 18:30
  Speaker 4: his neighbor's dog, and he loves the dog, I think,
• 18:33
  Speaker 4: and he tries to solve who has killed the dog.
• 18:35
  Speaker 4: But it's written in the voice of a child of
• 18:39
  Speaker 4: a boy with autism, so it's very authentic to that tone.
• 18:43
  Speaker 4: Not that I would know.
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: I've never even thought a little autistic.
• 18:48
  Speaker 4: I've never been inside the mind. I would be out
• 18:51
  Speaker 4: of my element inside the mind of a person with autism.
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: But you know who's definitely autistic? Encyclopedia Brown. Yes, he
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: was definite an autom Do.
• 19:00
  Speaker 4: You remember how do you remember what he did when
• 19:02
  Speaker 4: he wanted to memorize something?
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: What would he do?
• 19:06
  Speaker 4: He would go click and he would say it out loud. Oh,
• 19:10
  Speaker 4: he was like photographic because he had a photographic memory,
• 19:13
  Speaker 4: and he would sort of, I guess, catalyze that by
• 19:15
  Speaker 4: by saying the word click out loud, which drove me nuts. Yeah,
• 19:19
  Speaker 4: that is because I thought, if you truly have a
• 19:21
  Speaker 4: photographic memory, you don't need to say anything. Yeah, you
• 19:25
  Speaker 4: need to just say anything else.
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: Click is a little bit fucking rich.
• 19:27
  Speaker 4: Do you remember any of the Encyclopaedia Brown stories.
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: Of course, there's one mystery where like, uh, someone claimed
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: to have been like out of the house for forty
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: five minutes, and uh, well, then they were but or no,
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: they were in the shower or something like that. They'd
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: been in the shower and then they were, say at
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: one of the act so bored that they started filing
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: their nails. But then Encyclopedia Brown's like, wait, if you
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: were in the shower, or someone was supposed to have
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: been out on the town and they had their kid
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: and they set the kid down on the roof of
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: the car and then or on the hood of the car,
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: and Encyclopedia browns, wait, if you had been driving the car,
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: you couldn't put the kids. The car would be.
• 20:04
  Speaker 4: Hot looking back those mysteries, weren't that tough to salve it?
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: Now?
• 20:10
  Speaker 4: If I read that book now, I think I would
• 20:12
  Speaker 4: crack it pretty quickly. The one I remember distinctly was
• 20:15
  Speaker 4: that there was a contest at a state fair between
• 20:21
  Speaker 4: Encyclopedia Brown's tomboy friend, I believe, and this other kid
• 20:26
  Speaker 4: whose name was Jaws, No it was Jaws was his friend,
• 20:30
  Speaker 4: And then there was this other kid, and it was
• 20:33
  Speaker 4: that they had to eat and drink foul smelling things
• 20:36
  Speaker 4: or foul tasting things, and whoever could eat and drink
• 20:39
  Speaker 4: it with the littlest expression, I guess, would win the
• 20:42
  Speaker 4: contest of the state fair. And they noted that one
• 20:45
  Speaker 4: of the kids had this technique it was quite hot
• 20:48
  Speaker 4: that day, where in between rounds he would suck on
• 20:53
  Speaker 4: ice cubesh yes exactly. Encyclopedia surmise that he was numbing
• 21:01
  Speaker 4: his taste buds, which somehow ran a foul of the
• 21:03
  Speaker 4: rules for this state fair contest. Though I always wondered,
• 21:09
  Speaker 4: how in depth are those rules actually?
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah, who gives a fuck? If like someone was like,
• 21:13
  Speaker 1: you were sucking ice cubes, I'd be like, yes, so
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: what I found a way to be good at the competition?
• 21:17
  Speaker 1: Encyclopedia Brown, fucking use your autism for something better?
• 21:21
  Speaker 4: Yeah, am I wrong in remembering that? Ninety the bar
• 21:25
  Speaker 4: ninety percent of those mysteries were things like what we're describing,
• 21:28
  Speaker 4: and then every once in a while be like and
• 21:30
  Speaker 4: then someone was raped last night, Encyclopedia get on the case.
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: You're like, whoa And encyclop Pedia Brown swiped the inside
• 21:40
  Speaker 1: of her vagina whoa with a cotton swab.
• 21:46
  Speaker 4: I feel like that. I feel like there was occasionally
• 21:48
  Speaker 4: like a robbery or something. But I could be totally wrong.
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: Maybe it was all No, it was sexual crimes, Encyclopedia Brown,
• 21:56
  Speaker 1: SVU just disturbed children. So this was our roundabout way
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: because you had just gotten on the airplane, which Sas
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: could identify with his Encyclopedia Brown. Yeah, autistic ass, So
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: you get on this fucking tiny ass airplane.
• 22:13
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 22:13
  Speaker 4: I got on the airplane and Beef was sitting in
• 22:17
  Speaker 4: first class. We were sitting in first class too, me, Frankie,
• 22:23
  Speaker 4: Frankie and I were sitting in first class. But Beef
• 22:25
  Speaker 4: was also in first class. And I don't know if
• 22:29
  Speaker 4: barstool booked him in first class. They may have, But
• 22:33
  Speaker 4: look again, I don't mean to be mean Beef. Beef
• 22:37
  Speaker 4: is a big boy. This was a small plane, two
• 22:39
  Speaker 4: seats on one side, one seat on the other side,
• 22:43
  Speaker 4: And before we got on the plane, he said something
• 22:45
  Speaker 4: about how he was sitting in first class. He hates
• 22:47
  Speaker 4: these small planes, you know, he needs to sit in
• 22:50
  Speaker 4: first class or something like that. And it occurred to
• 22:53
  Speaker 4: me that Beef has gained so much weight that he's
• 22:58
  Speaker 4: become rich. He has eaten himself into a different class
• 23:05
  Speaker 4: of luxury, which I didn't I don't think that's happened
• 23:10
  Speaker 4: since kings.
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: Weirdly, it happens more than you think, because you look
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: at Frank the Tank's old seats at like the Mets game,
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: he's in like basically a club box. Really, he gets
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: like a terrorist because like.
• 23:24
  Speaker 4: And now he's been weight and he's moving more into
• 23:26
  Speaker 4: the nosebleeds.
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that he's blown away. I think that
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: he has he's like has to sit in these more
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: normal sized seats because you can't, you know, like do
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: they take your if you lose the weight, Do they
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: do they take your like wheelchair thing from your car?
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: You know, do they chip it off your license plate.
• 23:44
  Speaker 4: Or that is a great question. That is a great question.
• 23:47
  Speaker 4: Can you revoke someone's wheel like handicapped status if they
• 23:53
  Speaker 4: lose enough weight?
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: That would be so vicious. I imagine losing that. Boy.
• 23:58
  Speaker 4: You know what you do is you just hover one
• 24:00
  Speaker 4: pound over the cutoff, I guess, or when you go
• 24:04
  Speaker 4: in for the weighans to keep your status as handicapped,
• 24:08
  Speaker 4: you put some lead lugs in your boots.
• 24:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you have to put some lead lugs.
• 24:12
  Speaker 4: And then Encyclopedia Brown comes in and says, I saw
• 24:15
  Speaker 4: him walking on the beach and his footprints were six
• 24:18
  Speaker 4: inches deeper than they should have been.
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: And we're like, Encyclopedia, it doesn't fucking matter. Just he's
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: gonna park in the handicap spot. Anyway.
• 24:27
  Speaker 4: It's amazing how much better this podcast goes without task.
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: It's so nice. Uh so nice without is curmudgeon ass.
• 24:34
  Speaker 4: We really tied that up neatly there, I know, but
• 24:37
  Speaker 4: you know.
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: He ate his way into it. I thought that you
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: were going to say something about the weight distribution or
• 24:42
  Speaker 1: something like that. No, which is a real thing on
• 24:44
  Speaker 1: planes as well, it is any helicopters.
• 24:47
  Speaker 4: And there was also something very funny to me. There
• 24:50
  Speaker 4: were beef was sitting on the side of the two seats,
• 24:54
  Speaker 4: and there was a businessman in a suit sitting next
• 24:57
  Speaker 4: to him, you know, and he was, I mean he
• 25:00
  Speaker 4: clenching his shoulders as if he was sitting between two
• 25:02
  Speaker 4: bums on the subway. Really, yeah, he was making himself
• 25:06
  Speaker 4: as small as possible. Was he on the inside of
• 25:07
  Speaker 4: the outside, Well they were. He was on the window
• 25:09
  Speaker 4: seat and the beef was on the aisle.
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: I guess Beaf's kind of in both correct.
• 25:14
  Speaker 4: And it made me laugh to think that this businessman
• 25:20
  Speaker 4: flying from Myrtle Beach to Charlotte, who's probably you know,
• 25:25
  Speaker 4: let's just say, he's like a Southern oil baron.
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: Yeah, like a high powered lawyer something, you know.
• 25:31
  Speaker 4: Like one of those murdog sons. Yeah, one of the
• 25:35
  Speaker 4: only ones who didn't get killed. And he's made his
• 25:39
  Speaker 4: way up. He's entitled, he's got that Southern you know,
• 25:42
  Speaker 4: charm and whatever. And he's wearing his suit with his
• 25:45
  Speaker 4: jeans and and he thinks, yeah, I'm sitting in first class.
• 25:50
  Speaker 4: I deserve it. And he finds himself in first class
• 25:53
  Speaker 4: sitting next.
• 25:54
  Speaker 1: To that is a revoking of privileges.
• 25:58
  Speaker 4: You just don't expect. You've comes so far, working your
• 26:01
  Speaker 4: way up through the small town you know, fucking mattress
• 26:06
  Speaker 4: sales jobs of somewhere in South Carolina all the week
• 26:11
  Speaker 4: to being regional manager and shoving off those cries of nepotism.
• 26:16
  Speaker 1: That's what it's like when sas like wanted to switch
• 26:18
  Speaker 1: seats with the guy, or like they didn't want to
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: switch seats with the guy in first class. This would
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: be one of those rare circumstances, yes, where you don't
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: want to switch with the guy in first class.
• 26:27
  Speaker 4: Go ahead, Yeah, she that tiny sliver of chair that's
• 26:32
  Speaker 4: available up there, that's where you're at.
• 26:35
  Speaker 1: Oh Man, love beef. Never have met him, but I
• 26:37
  Speaker 1: just assumed him to be the nicest guy, just based
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: on the fact he takes his hat off every time
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: he shakes something.
• 26:41
  Speaker 4: He's amazing, wonderful guy. He also we were doing we
• 26:46
  Speaker 4: were doing the reason I don't feel so, you know,
• 26:49
  Speaker 4: I feel a little bit.
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: Okay, Well, he can't lose the weight. He's a guy
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: type of guy. He can't go on ozembic. He can't
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: be gone from beef to slim gym. Yeah.
• 26:57
  Speaker 4: I was gonna say, beef to Venison, what are you
• 26:58
  Speaker 4: gonna rebrand?
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: He can't nine lean beef like that's not gonna work
• 27:03
  Speaker 1: for him. He has already established himself. There's some guys
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: in here that can't lose it.
• 27:08
  Speaker 4: What's the what's the fake beef called wonder meat or
• 27:11
  Speaker 4: what is it called?
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: Oh oh yeah, I know what you're talking about. Impossible impossible,
• 27:17
  Speaker 1: possible beef impossible.
• 27:20
  Speaker 4: Uh yeah, Well, we were doing we were doing this
• 27:23
  Speaker 4: thing sometimes in golf, when you're deciding who gets to
• 27:27
  Speaker 4: tee off first. You stand in a circle and you
• 27:31
  Speaker 4: flip a tea and whoever the tea is pointing to
• 27:33
  Speaker 4: gets to go first on the tea box and we
• 27:36
  Speaker 4: line up to do this, and I cracked the joke immediately. Well,
• 27:40
  Speaker 4: beef has a huge advantage. He is in a circle,
• 27:44
  Speaker 4: He's taking up forty of the space, you know, in
• 27:48
  Speaker 4: a group of six that we had. And then I
• 27:51
  Speaker 4: immediately sort of tried to walk it back because I
• 27:53
  Speaker 4: don't He's so sweet, and he said, no, no, no,
• 27:57
  Speaker 4: you got to make those jokes. You got to make
• 27:59
  Speaker 4: those jokes. So you know, he's given us a little
• 28:02
  Speaker 4: bit of the green flag or the green light to
• 28:05
  Speaker 4: make those jokes. And you know, I hope that if
• 28:07
  Speaker 4: I were to put on weight, he would give it
• 28:10
  Speaker 4: to me as well.
• 28:10
  Speaker 1: But I and I hope that he also makes fun
• 28:13
  Speaker 1: of your like successful comedy career in Harvard education and
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: stuff like that. He actually can punch back.
• 28:18
  Speaker 4: Yeah, right exactly, you know, come to my level, just
• 28:24
  Speaker 4: punch across.
• 28:24
  Speaker 1: What would be an equal joke, a divorce joke or
• 28:27
  Speaker 1: something like that.
• 28:28
  Speaker 4: That's fine, that's funny. People haven't really been doing that.
• 28:33
  Speaker 4: I haven't gotten much of that, which is interesting.
• 28:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Maybe it's the same thing where like people are
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: like he or see such a sweet eye.
• 28:44
  Speaker 4: Yeah maybe if maybe if I were like a cock,
• 28:49
  Speaker 4: if I'd gotten divorced because I'd walked in.
• 28:51
  Speaker 1: On, you know, a soul cycle type of situation something
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: like that, which Dave. I mean he really was able
• 28:57
  Speaker 1: to beat that well.
• 28:59
  Speaker 4: Sate rabbit at it or be rabbit at it right right,
• 29:02
  Speaker 4: just leaned in. He started the cuck cycle t shirts.
• 29:05
  Speaker 4: What a saga that was.
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: That was a great saga. But I mean his girlfriend
• 29:08
  Speaker 1: was publicly cheating on him.
• 29:10
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, you know what, Uh, I think that. I
• 29:15
  Speaker 4: think that that's one of those things where if you
• 29:18
  Speaker 4: brand that the right way, if you present that the
• 29:20
  Speaker 4: right way, that turns into an attractive quality, really poor
• 29:27
  Speaker 4: guy you've been cheated on. You know, you're the guy
• 29:29
  Speaker 4: that's been cheated on.
• 29:31
  Speaker 1: You think that is an endearing quality? I guess so,
• 29:34
  Speaker 1: I guess so. I don't know. Like if somebody's on
• 29:37
  Speaker 1: like love is blind and like someone gets a bad
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: shake on Love is blind, someone's treated poorly by the
• 29:43
  Speaker 1: person opposite them, then I do think that that makes
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: them a more like sympathetic figure, like out and about
• 29:49
  Speaker 1: out on the town, like oh I could save them
• 29:52
  Speaker 1: or like mend them or some shit like that.
• 29:55
  Speaker 4: Right right, Yeah, I think that, uh, sympathy is a
• 30:00
  Speaker 4: very valuable currency, and oftentimes we see what I like
• 30:05
  Speaker 4: to call a race to the bottom.
• 30:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah. People love to be sympathetic figures.
• 30:10
  Speaker 4: Who can out victim the next victim.
• 30:14
  Speaker 1: It's so nice, except for white women because then they
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: just really have to ramp it up. Yeah, they throw
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: a guy like us under the bus.
• 30:21
  Speaker 4: Yeah, or you know, yeah, right, it's gonna make a
• 30:25
  Speaker 4: joke that I was going to have to ask you
• 30:27
  Speaker 4: guys to cut and I didn't do it.
• 30:29
  Speaker 1: See that's that's growth. That's just easier on the edit.
• 30:31
  Speaker 4: That is what what that's I feel good about that.
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that was smart.
• 30:36
  Speaker 4: Just what everybody, you're never gonna know.
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: Ye see, you enjoying the joke in your brain right now.
• 30:41
  Speaker 4: Yeah, well it was a good one. Yeah, and it
• 30:43
  Speaker 4: was it was definitely going to get me in trouble.
• 30:46
  Speaker 4: And it was spicy and funny and punchy. Yeah, that's nice.
• 30:51
  Speaker 4: I'll tell you. I'll tell you all after we've stopped recording.
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: I'll tell you guys. I mean right now, I guess
• 30:56
  Speaker 1: you guys could kind of see where the conversation was
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: go and just leave what you think the joke was
• 31:01
  Speaker 1: going to be in the comments, just and we'll let
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: you know if one of them was right. Yeah, yes, exactly,
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: Encyclopedia Brown.
• 31:10
  Speaker 4: Offer your own jokes for that moment, and we will
• 31:14
  Speaker 4: evaluate them as to their proximity to what I was
• 31:17
  Speaker 4: originally thinking.
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: Something about women and buses.
• 31:21
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it was it was white women. It was where
• 31:23
  Speaker 4: it was where that was the leading thing.
• 31:27
  Speaker 7: You know.
• 31:27
  Speaker 4: I don't I don't want to give too many clues.
• 31:29
  Speaker 4: I want to leave this open to interpretations and abstract painting.
• 31:33
  Speaker 4: And it is the its meaning is in the eye
• 31:36
  Speaker 4: of the beholder.
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: Yes, that's that's very nice.
• 31:39
  Speaker 4: So, uh, you know what I thought about today?
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: So I like.
• 31:46
  Speaker 4: I like doing good deeds entirely selfish purposes. I'm not
• 31:52
  Speaker 4: going to pretend that I'm doing this for any other reason.
• 31:55
  Speaker 4: That and that it makes me feel good, Well, that's
• 31:58
  Speaker 4: not entirely true. It's it's also because I believe I
• 32:01
  Speaker 4: should do these things.
• 32:02
  Speaker 1: But if there was no ancillary benefit, you'd be less
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: likely to do the things.
• 32:08
  Speaker 4: I guess they're not always things that really put me
• 32:13
  Speaker 4: out of my way very much. Here's what happened that
• 32:18
  Speaker 4: when I made that mini bar video where I ate
• 32:20
  Speaker 4: the whole mini bar at that hotel. As they told you,
• 32:23
  Speaker 4: a lot of the brands of the snacks.
• 32:26
  Speaker 1: They reached out to you because they want you to
• 32:28
  Speaker 1: on their snacks publicly.
• 32:29
  Speaker 4: That's right. They sent me packages of their goods and
• 32:34
  Speaker 4: one of them was a beef jerky company, and that
• 32:38
  Speaker 4: one was probably the coolest. Actually the guy I'll have
• 32:41
  Speaker 4: to get the name because he deserves it for a
• 32:43
  Speaker 4: shout out. But they sent me a bunch of beef jerky,
• 32:47
  Speaker 4: and I like beef jerky, but they also sent me
• 32:50
  Speaker 4: beef sticks.
• 32:52
  Speaker 1: What's the difference. Oh, it's like a little bit naughty
• 32:55
  Speaker 1: or it's not as lean as a jerky.
• 32:57
  Speaker 4: I don't know, man, But I don't like beef stick. Okay,
• 33:00
  Speaker 4: I don't like beef stick at all. I've never liked
• 33:04
  Speaker 4: my beef in the shape of a stick.
• 33:06
  Speaker 1: Is that like a like a slim gym.
• 33:09
  Speaker 7: It would be.
• 33:10
  Speaker 4: But you know, I think this is higher quality.
• 33:13
  Speaker 1: Less are mechanically separated chicken, I think is their biggest ingredients. Really, Yeah,
• 33:19
  Speaker 1: so this is probably mechanically separated beef.
• 33:22
  Speaker 4: It's probably true.
• 33:23
  Speaker 1: I wonder why they even have to say mechanically separated chicken.
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: I don't know why. I've never seen the preparation in
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: any other ingredients.
• 33:31
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean, but also when it comes to separating chicken,
• 33:34
  Speaker 4: I gotta believe I'm happier to know it was done
• 33:37
  Speaker 4: by the arm of a robot than some.
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: Old maid or some El Salvadorian man.
• 33:43
  Speaker 4: Yeah, just plucking pieces of white meat and throwing it
• 33:47
  Speaker 4: into a tub. Then it's compressed into a stick.
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so they sticked up some beef for you.
• 33:52
  Speaker 4: Well, they sent me a bunch of the beef sticks.
• 33:54
  Speaker 4: And I don't. As I said, I don't really like
• 33:56
  Speaker 4: beef stick. So I my apartment's small. I'm always in
• 34:00
  Speaker 4: the process of shedding unnecessary stuff.
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you want to be lean.
• 34:05
  Speaker 4: So I rounded up my beef sticks and put them
• 34:10
  Speaker 4: in my backpack, by the way, which contained eight hundred
• 34:15
  Speaker 4: and thirty dollars of ones.
• 34:20
  Speaker 1: Which is what got us sick.
• 34:22
  Speaker 4: Dude, bro the amount of cash that I brought with
• 34:28
  Speaker 4: me to Utah and then Myrtle Beach and then Charlotte
• 34:34
  Speaker 4: and then New York. The amount of cash that I had.
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: And it's ones too. It's like, if someone found all
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: those ones in your backpack in Utah, they'd probably be like,
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: what's up with Francis? Yeah? Is he okay? Like what
• 34:47
  Speaker 1: kind of stuff is he doing where he has this
• 34:49
  Speaker 1: much ones?
• 34:50
  Speaker 4: Dude, it went through so many TSA scanners And I'm
• 34:56
  Speaker 4: not really sure because isn't I remember in Wolf of
• 34:59
  Speaker 4: Wall Street when they strapped all the money to their
• 35:01
  Speaker 4: bodies to bring it to Switzerland or whatever.
• 35:03
  Speaker 1: You gotta declare a certain amoussage.
• 35:05
  Speaker 4: Well, I gu yes, I'm just surprised it didn't raise
• 35:07
  Speaker 4: any any fucking eyebrows.
• 35:12
  Speaker 1: Just dirty, filthy money that the TSA probably didn't even
• 35:15
  Speaker 1: want to touch it because they know how gross all
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: that fucking that eight hundred and thirty seven dollars of one.
• 35:20
  Speaker 4: Well, I'm also a little insulted. They didn't think it
• 35:23
  Speaker 4: was possibly twenties, fifties or hundreds, and you know, flagged
• 35:26
  Speaker 4: me down right.
• 35:27
  Speaker 1: How could they tell? Yeah, I guess it was so
• 35:29
  Speaker 1: loose or is it wadded up?
• 35:31
  Speaker 4: No, it was pretty it was pretty loose, slipping sliding around.
• 35:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Like if somebody, if like a girl saw that,
• 35:39
  Speaker 1: it would be probably an ick for her. It'd probably
• 35:41
  Speaker 1: be like a fucking turn off for a girl to
• 35:44
  Speaker 1: see a bunch of loose money, Like it's not cute
• 35:47
  Speaker 1: to have anything less than like twenties. Really, I guess
• 35:50
  Speaker 1: you're like tipping, Yeah, like you don't need Like, having
• 35:53
  Speaker 1: a bunch of a fat wad of loose money is
• 35:55
  Speaker 1: fucking gross to women.
• 35:57
  Speaker 4: Each time I opened my backpack, I had a little
• 36:00
  Speaker 4: pang of resentment towards you.
• 36:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's an albatross. It's like a bit of a
• 36:06
  Speaker 1: fucking the Stone from the Simpsons that when he has
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: like the stone of like glory like tether to him.
• 36:13
  Speaker 1: It is this massive stone you just have to carry
• 36:15
  Speaker 1: around this ton of a ton of ones that you
• 36:18
  Speaker 1: can't do shit with. You can't buy something with.
• 36:21
  Speaker 4: Them, No, you can't. You'd almost think I should give
• 36:25
  Speaker 4: some of this away, but then you don't. You're already
• 36:28
  Speaker 4: giving away beef stick.
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: So you gave away the beefstick that you loaded up
• 36:31
  Speaker 1: your backpack with.
• 36:33
  Speaker 4: I brought it with me in my backpack. Along with
• 36:38
  Speaker 4: I had three jars of granola butter. Another brand sent
• 36:42
  Speaker 4: me a bunch of granola butter. The fuck is granola butter.
• 36:44
  Speaker 4: It's basically cookie butter. It's delicious, But I can't have
• 36:50
  Speaker 4: that stuff in my house. You guys know me. If
• 36:53
  Speaker 4: I have a can of a jar of granola butter
• 36:55
  Speaker 4: in my house, I'll not touch it until one night
• 36:58
  Speaker 4: when I'll eat the whole thing, which is, you know,
• 37:02
  Speaker 4: thousands of calories.
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but at least you abstain and like self flagellate
• 37:07
  Speaker 1: enough leading up to it to keep yourself from being
• 37:10
  Speaker 1: a beef.
• 37:12
  Speaker 4: I abstain and then I binge.
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but I mean that bounces you out. That's how
• 37:17
  Speaker 1: you have And also we learned that you can throw
• 37:19
  Speaker 1: up with the best of them.
• 37:20
  Speaker 4: Yeah, but I'm not throwing up granola butter. It's too good,
• 37:23
  Speaker 4: too expensive, too tasty.
• 37:24
  Speaker 1: So what happened with all the beef sticks?
• 37:26
  Speaker 4: I brought the beef sticks in the granola butter in
• 37:28
  Speaker 4: my backpack along with all the cash, and I was
• 37:33
  Speaker 4: looking for a homeless person to give it to, to
• 37:37
  Speaker 4: give it to. And I got off the subway at
• 37:39
  Speaker 4: twenty third Street, off the f and started walking up
• 37:42
  Speaker 4: sixth Avenue, and I passed one guy and I said, not.
• 37:47
  Speaker 1: Him, Well, he didn't look like he.
• 37:50
  Speaker 4: Was doing this. He was one of these guys.
• 37:55
  Speaker 1: Oh, he's a question mark. He was the riddler. He
• 37:59
  Speaker 1: was just which I mean. I sometimes envy those people's hamstrings. Yeah,
• 38:04
  Speaker 1: I mean that's a loose ass handy. If you could
• 38:07
  Speaker 1: just be bent in half.
• 38:08
  Speaker 4: A few times, if you helped them straight, would their
• 38:12
  Speaker 4: spine just split in half?
• 38:15
  Speaker 1: It would like tick back like a ratchet. Yeah, and
• 38:19
  Speaker 1: be like locking in the seat on a roller coaster.
• 38:22
  Speaker 4: Like loading a catapult.
• 38:25
  Speaker 1: You would have to ratchet it all the way back
• 38:27
  Speaker 1: before you could launch them. Feeling somebody back, feeling a
• 38:32
  Speaker 1: homeless person.
• 38:33
  Speaker 4: Put all on his forehead.
• 38:36
  Speaker 1: They just I respect the hell out of all the homeless.
• 38:40
  Speaker 1: Obviously this guy wasn't.
• 38:46
  Speaker 4: This guy was not moving. Yeah, And I just I
• 38:51
  Speaker 4: didn't know what.
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: You want this to be appreciated, this act well.
• 38:55
  Speaker 4: And I also just thought to myself. That's a guy
• 38:57
  Speaker 4: who's not really burning that many calories, so he probably
• 38:59
  Speaker 4: doesn't need to plenish them.
• 39:01
  Speaker 1: And the beef sticks would probably give them bad reflux.
• 39:04
  Speaker 4: With his posture, I had the same thought.
• 39:06
  Speaker 1: You know, he doesn't really have the up and down.
• 39:09
  Speaker 4: I was concerned about feeding him too rich food, just
• 39:13
  Speaker 4: as the gis who discovered the concentration camps.
• 39:18
  Speaker 1: Right, you can't. You can't overload them right away.
• 39:20
  Speaker 4: We can't give them. We can't give them really rich
• 39:24
  Speaker 4: food because then they've been eating very simple foods. We
• 39:26
  Speaker 4: had to start them and build back their their appetite.
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: Didn't they like keep them in the concentration camps for
• 39:30
  Speaker 1: a couple of days. That's like, actually, can you finish
• 39:32
  Speaker 1: the job? The railroad's almost done?
• 39:34
  Speaker 4: Oh that is that's a thought I remember from Band
• 39:40
  Speaker 4: of Brothers as being because they wanted to keep them
• 39:42
  Speaker 4: in one area to administer you know.
• 39:45
  Speaker 7: First aid.
• 39:45
  Speaker 1: Yes, I'm sure that's what it is.
• 39:47
  Speaker 4: Yeah, No, but your your ideas sound. You know where
• 39:51
  Speaker 4: else that happened, by the way, in the Odyssey, really yeah,
• 39:55
  Speaker 4: there was something about his band of men or something
• 40:00
  Speaker 4: get get starved for a while, then they start eating.
• 40:04
  Speaker 4: They finally get food and rich and they gorge on
• 40:06
  Speaker 4: it and they get really sick.
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's I mean, I think that's it. Isn't that
• 40:11
  Speaker 1: a thing?
• 40:11
  Speaker 7: Yeah?
• 40:12
  Speaker 1: Or when people get off submarines, if they stand up
• 40:15
  Speaker 1: too fast, they get the bens.
• 40:16
  Speaker 4: Or something, so they end up like that guy on
• 40:17
  Speaker 4: the street.
• 40:18
  Speaker 1: That he was probably just a submarine. He was just
• 40:21
  Speaker 1: fresh off of a submarine. And it was still come
• 40:23
  Speaker 1: as homeless operator. He's a periscope operator. He was just
• 40:27
  Speaker 1: a sickly periscope operator. But I'm with you, you don't
• 40:30
  Speaker 1: want to give it to the wrong homeless guy. I've
• 40:32
  Speaker 1: made a mistake before, and it was I was leaving
• 40:34
  Speaker 1: Chicago one time, probably like eight or nine years ago,
• 40:38
  Speaker 1: and I had liquor in bottles and weed and I
• 40:42
  Speaker 1: didn't want to fly with it. This was before even
• 40:43
  Speaker 1: I was comfortable flying with weed. Yeah, And I gave
• 40:46
  Speaker 1: it to a homeless guy and I was like, I
• 40:48
  Speaker 1: thought that I was like changing his life. I thought
• 40:52
  Speaker 1: I felt like I was doing such a nice thing
• 40:54
  Speaker 1: for him that he'd be so excited. I was like,
• 40:56
  Speaker 1: you got any money? And I was like, fuck, dude.
• 40:58
  Speaker 1: I was so proud of myself that I was about
• 41:02
  Speaker 1: to do this awesome d like because I was like, oh,
• 41:04
  Speaker 1: most people probably just offer them a little fucking lunch
• 41:06
  Speaker 1: or some shit like this is a bunch of booze
• 41:09
  Speaker 1: and a bunch of free.
• 41:10
  Speaker 4: Good weed, cutting out the middleman.
• 41:12
  Speaker 1: And I just would gave it to him all in
• 41:14
  Speaker 1: a plastic bag. I was like, there's a bunch of
• 41:16
  Speaker 1: like there's like liquor and weed in there, like you
• 41:18
  Speaker 1: have a great time, got any money? And I was
• 41:21
  Speaker 1: just so fucking bummed out.
• 41:23
  Speaker 4: Oh he didn't want it.
• 41:25
  Speaker 1: No, I mean he took it, but he also he
• 41:27
  Speaker 1: wanted He just wanted more indifferent when like I was
• 41:31
  Speaker 1: only set up at that time to be able to
• 41:33
  Speaker 1: give him the weed and the booze which I couldn't
• 41:36
  Speaker 1: take with me.
• 41:36
  Speaker 4: I'm so so surprised by that, you know, you didn't
• 41:39
  Speaker 4: try to shake him and be like, look, this is
• 41:41
  Speaker 4: what you're gonna buy a He's better than money. This
• 41:43
  Speaker 4: is what you're going to get.
• 41:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah, this is this is good. This is going to
• 41:46
  Speaker 1: enhance your day no matter how you spin it, or
• 41:49
  Speaker 1: you could sell this for money. Yeah, this is worth money.
• 41:53
  Speaker 1: It is It's worth money in the homeless community too.
• 41:56
  Speaker 4: Yeah, but he probably doesn't have a scale. He doesn't
• 41:59
  Speaker 4: have You was already in the container. It was in
• 42:02
  Speaker 4: the weak container like it was just it was disappointing. Yeah,
• 42:06
  Speaker 4: but he probably doesn't have one of those magnifying glasses
• 42:09
  Speaker 4: to check out the terpenes.
• 42:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah, he probably couldn't appreciate the terpenes or the crystals. Yeah,
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: probably couldn't see all the crystals. I should have been
• 42:16
  Speaker 1: shook the man, be like, there's fucking crystals in here,
• 42:18
  Speaker 1: don't you fucking get it? Slap the shit out of him.
• 42:21
  Speaker 4: I'm told this one actually helps with the body.
• 42:24
  Speaker 1: This will help her creativity. So did you wind up
• 42:29
  Speaker 1: finding the right guy to give the shit to? Yeah?
• 42:30
  Speaker 4: I was glad I passed on the first guy because
• 42:32
  Speaker 4: half a block later I saw what I wanted, which
• 42:35
  Speaker 4: was sort of a family. It was it was two
• 42:40
  Speaker 4: women and a little baby and then probably a six
• 42:44
  Speaker 4: year old girl.
• 42:45
  Speaker 1: The Roosevelt Hotel.
• 42:46
  Speaker 4: No, this was probably twenty fifth and sixth right there.
• 42:51
  Speaker 4: They were sort of sitting in one of those alcoves
• 42:54
  Speaker 4: of a building. It's like a just an area that
• 42:57
  Speaker 4: comes a little bit off the street and was pretty.
• 43:00
  Speaker 4: It looked cozy what they'd built.
• 43:01
  Speaker 1: So I had they had a nice little, uh little
• 43:05
  Speaker 1: family unit going on.
• 43:06
  Speaker 4: Yeah, and they had a sign.
• 43:09
  Speaker 1: I didn't.
• 43:09
  Speaker 4: I sort of started reading the sign and then I
• 43:11
  Speaker 4: was like this, I don't.
• 43:12
  Speaker 1: I don't believe you.
• 43:13
  Speaker 4: I was more like, why am I acting like I
• 43:16
  Speaker 4: actually need to be proven that they just should have this,
• 43:23
  Speaker 4: Like as if the words on the sign are going
• 43:25
  Speaker 4: to say, oh, yes, we does anyone have any beef stick?
• 43:28
  Speaker 1: If we're a family unit, we're in need of oat butter.
• 43:32
  Speaker 4: Yeah, right, granola butter oats, beefstick and granola buttter our
• 43:37
  Speaker 4: favorite snacks. So then you know.
• 43:41
  Speaker 1: The girls, the little girls were.
• 43:44
  Speaker 4: The that's all. That was the selling point.
• 43:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 43:47
  Speaker 4: And so I said, would you guys like some food?
• 43:49
  Speaker 4: And they said yes, please, And so I started pulling
• 43:52
  Speaker 4: these things out of my backpack, making sure that they
• 43:55
  Speaker 4: didn't see the one hundreds of ones.
• 43:58
  Speaker 1: You could have changed their life. Yeah, but I mean
• 44:02
  Speaker 1: you don't want to make them be the ones who
• 44:04
  Speaker 1: are embarrassed to have all the ones?
• 44:06
  Speaker 4: Well I did what you did, right. I thought food
• 44:09
  Speaker 4: is better of better application than exactly the ones.
• 44:14
  Speaker 1: And then you know that the little girls aren't using
• 44:16
  Speaker 1: the ones for drugs.
• 44:18
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean those little babies can't eat cash. What
• 44:21
  Speaker 4: are they supposed to do with cash?
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: Or that their father's not using it to buy a
• 44:25
  Speaker 1: gay male prostitute in New York and thus ruining the
• 44:28
  Speaker 1: integrity of his family.
• 44:30
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I didn't get the sense that he was around.
• 44:33
  Speaker 1: Oh there was no dad there. No, okay, the rest
• 44:35
  Speaker 1: of the family was there. I don't know why.
• 44:36
  Speaker 4: Yeah, So I gave them. I started pulling these beef
• 44:40
  Speaker 4: sticks out and I sold them on the beef sticks. First,
• 44:43
  Speaker 4: I just dropped them right on the blanket. I said,
• 44:45
  Speaker 4: this is beef stick, but it's high quality.
• 44:47
  Speaker 1: This is good shit.
• 44:48
  Speaker 4: No preservatives, I think, I said. And they were like,
• 44:52
  Speaker 4: we don't speak English. And then I said okay. And
• 44:57
  Speaker 4: then I also have this granola part. I swear to guy,
• 45:00
  Speaker 4: this happened just right before we got here. The walk
• 45:03
  Speaker 4: yard is three jars, and I'm embarrassed to say I
• 45:06
  Speaker 4: had eaten half of one of them, and I said,
• 45:09
  Speaker 4: I had. I had a little of this one, so
• 45:11
  Speaker 4: if you want, we can throw that out. And they
• 45:12
  Speaker 4: were like, no, no, it's okay. And the other ones
• 45:16
  Speaker 4: had the they were sealed. So I gave them two
• 45:19
  Speaker 4: and a half jars of granola butter and about twelve
• 45:21
  Speaker 4: beef sticks. It's not a very well rounded meal, but
• 45:25
  Speaker 4: it's fine, though. It's better than nothing. But I could
• 45:27
  Speaker 4: also tell that there was another guy coming up at
• 45:29
  Speaker 4: some point that day that was going to bring.
• 45:32
  Speaker 1: The rest of the food pyramid.
• 45:33
  Speaker 4: Greek yogurt and steamed broccoli.
• 45:36
  Speaker 1: Some organic, some some raw honey or something like that.
• 45:40
  Speaker 4: Just waves of ingredients like the three wise men, as
• 45:44
  Speaker 4: if they work for a kitchen.
• 45:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, gold yukon, potato.
• 45:52
  Speaker 4: Frank and spice and mustard, mustard. I didn't like that.
• 45:58
  Speaker 1: It was it, but there was nothing for frank.
• 46:00
  Speaker 4: No. I struggled with that.
• 46:02
  Speaker 1: There's nothing there. There's nothing there, dude, it's not your fault.
• 46:05
  Speaker 4: Murr is a very difficult word to spin into a food.
• 46:09
  Speaker 1: I know, you really have to go to practical jokers
• 46:11
  Speaker 1: to get any good murder.
• 46:13
  Speaker 4: That's exactly what I was thinking.
• 46:15
  Speaker 1: It's the only place that you can land.
• 46:18
  Speaker 4: So I did that, right, And then I, uh, I
• 46:22
  Speaker 4: also enjoy purging my apartment of clothes that I'm no
• 46:27
  Speaker 4: longer wearing, right.
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: That's nice, But also your clothes are so expensive.
• 46:33
  Speaker 4: Well that was why I then realized that if I
• 46:36
  Speaker 4: were to come back tomorrow with a bag of clothes.
• 46:39
  Speaker 4: I would want them to try them on.
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: Ah, this is brunello, cucanello. I'm not wasting this brunello
• 46:49
  Speaker 1: on you. If you're not going to fit this vest.
• 46:51
  Speaker 4: That's where it you know, it's not so much the
• 46:54
  Speaker 4: fam like. That's where I would have considered the bent
• 46:56
  Speaker 4: over man, because the suede of my brunello coats actually
• 47:00
  Speaker 4: ben's very well with hag so nice hags like distaff
• 47:07
  Speaker 4: in the wind.
• 47:09
  Speaker 1: So beautifully said, I think that's Shakespeare.
• 47:12
  Speaker 4: Twelfth Night. Yeah, music be the food of blood. Play on,
• 47:17
  Speaker 4: give me excess to that surfacing.
• 47:19
  Speaker 1: Wait, this is what Sas told us not to do.
• 47:20
  Speaker 4: This appetite made so sick and.
• 47:23
  Speaker 1: Told us definitely don't do this.
• 47:24
  Speaker 4: That's strain again. It had a dying fall anyway.
• 47:27
  Speaker 1: Ummm so, so if you're going to bring back.
• 47:32
  Speaker 4: Some clothes Shakespeare, no day ship.
• 47:36
  Speaker 1: He said, no. Twelfth Night.
• 47:37
  Speaker 4: Yeah uh so, yeah, so I'm thinking of bringing some
• 47:41
  Speaker 4: clothes because you know, when you donate clothes, which I do,
• 47:45
  Speaker 4: I usually just throw them in the bin of the
• 47:48
  Speaker 4: kind of the goodwill bin or the housing works or whatever.
• 47:51
  Speaker 4: And I don't know where that's going I don't know
• 47:54
  Speaker 4: who that's going to. I don't know if that's going
• 47:57
  Speaker 4: they are, yeah, they are. That's also it gets sold.
• 48:02
  Speaker 4: So there's still capitalism involved, and there's no eye for
• 48:07
  Speaker 4: thrifting and fashion, which is why I would like to
• 48:11
  Speaker 4: dress homeless homeless. I'd like to style them. I'd like
• 48:18
  Speaker 4: to style them in my clothing. That would be so
• 48:20
  Speaker 4: stand up, stand up, pull out of tape measures, right,
• 48:23
  Speaker 4: get there, like getting like their end seam arms up. Now, okay,
• 48:27
  Speaker 4: they just pissed themselves. You don't know what coat size
• 48:30
  Speaker 4: you are, do you? I forget it. I don't.
• 48:33
  Speaker 1: I used to be at thirty four.
• 48:35
  Speaker 4: Yeah, so yeah, that's what i'd like to do. I
• 48:40
  Speaker 4: would quite literally like to take the shirt.
• 48:42
  Speaker 1: I never realized how hard it must be for you
• 48:44
  Speaker 1: to give away clothes because all your clothes are so
• 48:47
  Speaker 1: nice that like you're really killing your babies at all times.
• 48:50
  Speaker 1: Because me, I have like a constant like feeder economy
• 48:54
  Speaker 1: of the donation bin of free T shirts, Like I'm
• 48:59
  Speaker 1: always kind of taking the free T shirt but also
• 49:01
  Speaker 1: getting rid of them pretty fast, so I feel like
• 49:04
  Speaker 1: I'm always getting rid of ten percent of my stuff.
• 49:06
  Speaker 1: But those are the free t shirts I was going
• 49:08
  Speaker 1: to get rid of anyway.
• 49:09
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it's like a club in Scottsdale. One in, one out.
• 49:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's one in, one out. Yeah. And I think
• 49:15
  Speaker 1: that that's a nice way to do it as opposed
• 49:17
  Speaker 1: to having like high value club members that you have
• 49:19
  Speaker 1: to kick out, right.
• 49:21
  Speaker 4: Right, Well, I always see it as a gradual improvement
• 49:25
  Speaker 4: over time, which is that I only allow myself to
• 49:29
  Speaker 4: buy clothes if I am I don't have any more
• 49:33
  Speaker 4: space in my closet at this point, right, My closet
• 49:35
  Speaker 4: is tidy, right, I mean it.
• 49:37
  Speaker 1: Is organized, well oiled machine.
• 49:40
  Speaker 4: I'm folding my T shirts with a chicken separation robot,
• 49:47
  Speaker 4: everything increased perfectly.
• 49:49
  Speaker 1: There's like eight perfect folds down to the smallest possible exactly.
• 49:53
  Speaker 4: I mean you could turn those T shirts into beefstick
• 49:54
  Speaker 4: if you wanted to.
• 49:57
  Speaker 1: So. And then at that point you get him to the.
• 50:00
  Speaker 4: Homeless exactly, and I'm like, don't eat that. Unpack it.
• 50:04
  Speaker 4: It usually fits into a small T shirt cannon.
• 50:07
  Speaker 1: But yeah, like a bank tube today, it's.
• 50:10
  Speaker 4: Going on your back provided it fits right in the shoulders.
• 50:13
  Speaker 1: And if it's even a little bit off, you find
• 50:15
  Speaker 1: another homeless person.
• 50:16
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm sorry, I could off you actually get nothing.
• 50:20
  Speaker 4: There's a trimmer guy down the lock.
• 50:22
  Speaker 1: There's the bait and switch you ever see. There's some
• 50:25
  Speaker 1: homeless people that there's always somebody like kind of bent
• 50:28
  Speaker 1: over talking to Is that right? There's a homeless guy
• 50:33
  Speaker 1: on seventh half that always has someone talking to him,
• 50:37
  Speaker 1: like an older guy. He's always doing like a crossword.
• 50:40
  Speaker 1: He's been he's been there for like as long as
• 50:41
  Speaker 1: our office has been here, and there's always someone bent
• 50:45
  Speaker 1: over talking to him, or sometimes even people squatting down
• 50:47
  Speaker 1: talking to him. And I don't know if their outreach
• 50:50
  Speaker 1: programs or how like, if they're attracted to him, or
• 50:53
  Speaker 1: if he's striking up conversations. But he's definitely homeless, but
• 50:57
  Speaker 1: he's always has a companion to convert.
• 51:00
  Speaker 4: That's nice. Is it always the same person talking to him?
• 51:03
  Speaker 1: Always different people? O?
• 51:05
  Speaker 4: Why this guy is charming?
• 51:07
  Speaker 1: He might be just a charming homeless guy.
• 51:09
  Speaker 4: I mean that that level of charisma would would make
• 51:13
  Speaker 4: you wonder how he ever ended up on the street.
• 51:15
  Speaker 1: It might be just by choice, or he might have
• 51:17
  Speaker 1: a night He might be like the lady from home
• 51:19
  Speaker 1: alone with the pigeons. Oh yeah, who shouldn't probably be homeless?
• 51:24
  Speaker 1: Was she. Yeah, she was a pigeon lady.
• 51:28
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I guess pigeons are usually a telltale sign.
• 51:33
  Speaker 1: But she was like a high class homeless woman. Yeah,
• 51:37
  Speaker 1: she appreciated the phil Harmonic or whatever.
• 51:42
  Speaker 4: Well read. She's like that that Jamie Fox movie where
• 51:45
  Speaker 4: they discovered he went to Juilliard. Did you ever see that?
• 51:49
  Speaker 1: I don't think I did.
• 51:50
  Speaker 4: The cellist?
• 51:51
  Speaker 1: Oh is that what that is?
• 51:53
  Speaker 4: Yeah? And I think it was Robert Downey Junior figures
• 51:55
  Speaker 4: out somehow that this guy who.
• 51:58
  Speaker 1: Oh I read that book, book is it? Yeah, he's
• 52:01
  Speaker 1: like a homeless guy and he's like, uh, he's like
• 52:04
  Speaker 1: a well trained but he's like, he's like a homeless
• 52:07
  Speaker 1: guy who's not crazy or addicted to drugs. I think
• 52:11
  Speaker 1: you had or something.
• 52:12
  Speaker 4: I thought he did have a some sort of schizophrenia
• 52:16
  Speaker 4: or bipolar disorder.
• 52:18
  Speaker 1: Maybe that's maybe he does. Yeah, maybe I'm thinking of
• 52:21
  Speaker 1: a different book about a homeless guy.
• 52:22
  Speaker 4: I don't feel well. Oh no, I'm not even kidding you.
• 52:26
  Speaker 4: I just started feeling nauseous. Oh no, is this room
• 52:32
  Speaker 4: a fucking petri dish ground zero?
• 52:36
  Speaker 1: Oh no, dude, that scares the shit out of me.
• 52:39
  Speaker 4: I don't feel very well. Oh no, I wouldn't have
• 52:44
  Speaker 4: said something, and.
• 52:45
  Speaker 1: You sound bad right away.
• 52:47
  Speaker 4: I don't feel well.
• 52:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, what the fuck? Your voice sounds bad right away.
• 52:51
  Speaker 4: I haven't eaten anything weird today. I've only eaten ohal uh.
• 52:56
  Speaker 4: By the way, uh, I sort of do a little
• 53:03
  Speaker 4: bit of a bit on this. I mean, it's no
• 53:04
  Speaker 4: secret that I was pretty sad after I got divorced,
• 53:07
  Speaker 4: and I look back on some of the behavior that
• 53:10
  Speaker 4: changed in my life. I'm a very routine oriented person,
• 53:14
  Speaker 4: so I didn't let myself go that much. I continued
• 53:17
  Speaker 4: working out and all that, but there were small subtle
• 53:19
  Speaker 4: things that started happening, which I look back now that
• 53:22
  Speaker 4: I've now I've changed them back to my original way.
• 53:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 53:27
  Speaker 4: But one of them was that I just stopped microwaving
• 53:32
  Speaker 4: my oatmeal. Like there was a three month period where
• 53:38
  Speaker 4: I was like, fuck it, I'll just eat it cold.
• 53:41
  Speaker 9: You just have water and oat Dude, do you know
• 53:43
  Speaker 9: how terrible, like fucking un microwaved ote meal is. Do
• 53:50
  Speaker 9: you have any idea how sad you have to be
• 53:54
  Speaker 9: to be Like, I'm not even gonna punch the buttons in.
• 53:57
  Speaker 1: That's so easy. It's usually like you just had to
• 54:00
  Speaker 1: push like the thirty second button three times.
• 54:02
  Speaker 4: Now I'm now, I'm back to eating it hot. I've
• 54:06
  Speaker 4: earned that. Jesus realiged into the sunlit.
• 54:10
  Speaker 7: World of warm oatmeal.
• 54:12
  Speaker 4: But there was a period there where I was just like,
• 54:15
  Speaker 4: by the way choking it down. It doesn't go down smooth.
• 54:19
  Speaker 4: It scratches your throat like it's raw kale, like you're
• 54:24
  Speaker 4: trying to swallow a barbed wire fence.
• 54:27
  Speaker 1: Jesus ch every morning, just choking down. It's very funny
• 54:31
  Speaker 1: to think about, like a Patrick Bateman style of depression,
• 54:35
  Speaker 1: where like you still know that you need the fuel
• 54:38
  Speaker 1: and nutrients, like you can't give that all. Yeah, you
• 54:41
  Speaker 1: can't give that up, but you're just gonna deprive yourself
• 54:43
  Speaker 1: with some like small bit of happiness or like taking
• 54:47
  Speaker 1: care of yourself in a small way by not heating
• 54:50
  Speaker 1: your fucking open. Yeah, it was it milk or water.
• 54:53
  Speaker 4: I was I've always done it with oat milk, but sometimes,
• 54:57
  Speaker 4: like if I didn't have oat milk, I would just
• 54:59
  Speaker 4: put water in it. And those were the those were
• 55:02
  Speaker 4: the tough days.
• 55:03
  Speaker 1: That's so dark.
• 55:05
  Speaker 4: Water and and just wet oatmeal that has not been
• 55:09
  Speaker 4: cooked in any way dark. And then the other thing
• 55:14
  Speaker 4: that I was I would do this too. I didn't
• 55:19
  Speaker 4: really notice until like a little bit in but typical
• 55:24
  Speaker 4: my my, My microwave is in the lower part of
• 55:28
  Speaker 4: my kitchen, you know, counter. It's down, and it's at
• 55:35
  Speaker 4: my waist level, such that when I would punch in
• 55:39
  Speaker 4: the numbers for the oatmeal, I would start it and
• 55:41
  Speaker 4: then I would step to the side.
• 55:44
  Speaker 1: You don't want it in front of your nuts.
• 55:45
  Speaker 4: I didn't want to. I believed I you know, someday
• 55:47
  Speaker 4: I'll have children.
• 55:49
  Speaker 1: My wife has yelled at me for standing in front
• 55:50
  Speaker 1: of the microwave. I didn't even realize it's a bad
• 55:52
  Speaker 1: thing because mine's also at nutty level.
• 55:54
  Speaker 4: Yeah, mine was right in front of my junk. And
• 55:58
  Speaker 4: there was a period there where I just was just
• 56:01
  Speaker 4: letting it fry. I was just straight up like, this
• 56:05
  Speaker 4: is the microwave, just like it doesn't even.
• 56:07
  Speaker 1: Matter is leaning on it.
• 56:09
  Speaker 4: I don't deserve to have children. My legacy shouldn't live
• 56:12
  Speaker 4: on the die with me. I'll never love again.
• 56:17
  Speaker 1: Just hard boiling your fucking testicles. Yeah, that's so vicious.
• 56:22
  Speaker 1: I'm happy're out of those dark phases. But that is
• 56:25
  Speaker 1: funny that it manifested itself in that that way. Yeah,
• 56:29
  Speaker 1: because I know you're not gonna be like gross, You're
• 56:32
  Speaker 1: not gonna be like super like messy in your house.
• 56:35
  Speaker 1: That would have like.
• 56:36
  Speaker 4: No, I couldn't allow that to happen. So, you know,
• 56:40
  Speaker 4: it was just these little.
• 56:41
  Speaker 1: Like how people depress. People don't brush your teeth because
• 56:44
  Speaker 1: they're not taking care of themselves. And I think that's
• 56:46
  Speaker 1: what it is. It's like you're a way of not
• 56:49
  Speaker 1: taking care of yourself because you kind of care so little.
• 56:51
  Speaker 1: Or they maybe won't bathe because like they're just not
• 56:53
  Speaker 1: taking care of themselves. Yeah, because they don't have that
• 56:57
  Speaker 1: regard for self. And so that was your lack of
• 57:00
  Speaker 1: regard for self.
• 57:01
  Speaker 4: Yeah, small small things, just small lapses in self care.
• 57:07
  Speaker 4: People have often asked me. A lot of people reached
• 57:10
  Speaker 4: out to me and asked for advice because they have
• 57:14
  Speaker 4: gone through or are going through divorces or tough breakups
• 57:16
  Speaker 4: and things like that. Yeah, he asked, you know, do
• 57:22
  Speaker 4: you have any advice? And I was like, dude, whatever
• 57:24
  Speaker 4: I would do, I would stand up more straight when
• 57:26
  Speaker 4: you're standing on the street corners because you're definitely not
• 57:31
  Speaker 4: gonna get any beefstick.
• 57:32
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 57:33
  Speaker 4: From magnanimous Passerby.
• 57:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, he's probably identical to the beef stick.
• 57:38
  Speaker 4: Is it passers by? I don't know. However, my advice,
• 57:44
  Speaker 4: just generally if anyone actually because there's so many people
• 57:46
  Speaker 4: ask me about that, is to focus on your routine
• 57:52
  Speaker 4: and make sure you keep your space clean, yourself clean,
• 57:57
  Speaker 4: go to the gym, just put one foot in front
• 57:59
  Speaker 4: of the other. Develop a routine so that it distracts
• 58:02
  Speaker 4: you from thinking about your loss.
• 58:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's smart. Yeah, I think any type of routine
• 58:07
  Speaker 1: is always uh, it's just you can ground yourself in
• 58:11
  Speaker 1: it and just be sad in between the ship you're doing.
• 58:14
  Speaker 4: There you go, there, you go.
• 58:17
  Speaker 1: Just land it and be sad about the stuff in between.
• 58:20
  Speaker 1: Did you did you watch? So? There's lots of big
• 58:22
  Speaker 1: happenings in the comedy world for that I'll touch on
• 58:25
  Speaker 1: real quick. Shane Gillis did s n L. Conan did
• 58:28
  Speaker 1: the oscars?
• 58:30
  Speaker 4: I did not watch that.
• 58:31
  Speaker 1: The and Andrew Schultz and Julio both came out with
• 58:34
  Speaker 1: specials yesterday.
• 58:35
  Speaker 4: Yes, yes, all awesome. Big Conan fan, by.
• 58:40
  Speaker 1: The way, love so he's so funny.
• 58:42
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I've always felt heartbroken for him that he did
• 58:50
  Speaker 4: not as a result of Jay Leno, that he did
• 58:55
  Speaker 4: not get to be the Tonight Show host, which he
• 58:58
  Speaker 4: which he would be to this day. He would have
• 59:02
  Speaker 4: had a Letterman run. And it's all because he got it.
• 59:07
  Speaker 4: He had been, you know, groomed for it as being
• 59:11
  Speaker 4: the late night guy after Leno on the Tonight Show
• 59:15
  Speaker 4: for years. Leno vacates, NBC promotes Conan to hosts of
• 59:20
  Speaker 4: the Tonight Show, and he does it for whatever a
• 59:23
  Speaker 4: year or less, and then Leno asks for it back an,
• 59:27
  Speaker 4: NBC acquiesces, and then Conan kind of just got relegated
• 59:32
  Speaker 4: to TBS.
• 59:33
  Speaker 1: And then I don't even see it as a relegation though, honestly,
• 59:36
  Speaker 1: I think that he is so funny and and still
• 59:41
  Speaker 1: just gets what funny is where a lot of people
• 59:43
  Speaker 1: who get a late night job are They're like, okay,
• 59:46
  Speaker 1: now it's almost my responsibility to grandstand and like have
• 59:51
  Speaker 1: these like you want to talk about current events and
• 59:54
  Speaker 1: current events as politics, so you want to have like
• 59:56
  Speaker 1: a strong opinion on politics, and it's like that really
• 59:59
  Speaker 1: doesn't not do you the biggest service in that in
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 1: that space, And like you've been watching Conan do the oscars,
• 1:00:06
  Speaker 1: he wasn't doing any like political shiit. He was just
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 1: like being funny and I think that and like goofy
• 1:00:11
  Speaker 1: and silly, and I think that he is the master
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 1: of that.
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 4: He's such a class act. I think his humor is elevated.
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 4: I think you know, he's accessible.
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 1: He doesn't funny character. Yeah, podcast is funny. He's not
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 1: really afraid of like, yeah.
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 4: I've always revered Conan and uh. Anyway, but I didn't
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 4: watch I didn't watch the Oscars.
• 1:00:37
  Speaker 1: It's so funny. My wife was just like, I've never
• 1:00:39
  Speaker 1: seen you like laugh like this.
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 4: Watch it. Then that's high praise.
• 1:00:42
  Speaker 7: I thought it was really good.
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 4: Alright, let's take a minute to talk about kick Off
• 1:00:48
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• 1:03:14
  Speaker 4: I did watch Shane on SNL, and you know, I
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 4: personally loved it. I knew what was coming. I had
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 4: seen the monologue Kill the two whatever three days before,
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 4: so I enjoyed the jokes again. There was so much
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 4: online commentary about it, which I found very lazy. Found
• 1:03:38
  Speaker 4: it very lazy.
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but when you're in, just like the full on,
• 1:03:41
  Speaker 1: when you're mainstream, when you're hosting SNL, I know you're
• 1:03:44
  Speaker 1: just you're open to unnuanced, lazy, just people being like
• 1:03:49
  Speaker 1: that's fucking awesome, where that fucking sucks, I hate that guy,
• 1:03:52
  Speaker 1: or that guy's the best of all time. It's just
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 1: you'll get binary opinions, I know.
• 1:03:56
  Speaker 4: But you know, anyone on Twitter, and I saw a
• 1:03:59
  Speaker 4: lot of this people saying he was bombing. It's like
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 4: they're there, he's getting big laughs. You know, bombing would
• 1:04:08
  Speaker 4: be silence. Bombing is silence and groans. And if you're
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 4: going to be a critical and cynical, fucking get it right.
• 1:04:20
  Speaker 4: That's kind of how I feel like I will. I
• 1:04:22
  Speaker 4: don't mind a then negative opinion, an anti opinion, one
• 1:04:26
  Speaker 4: that's contrary to my own, as long as it's based
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 4: in the truth of what's happening. You know, they're not
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 4: in the room. Do they think those laughs are fake?
• 1:04:40
  Speaker 4: Do they think it's a laugh track?
• 1:04:41
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 4: I mean everyone's watching the band behind him. Saw a
• 1:04:46
  Speaker 4: lot of commentary on that, Yeah.
• 1:04:49
  Speaker 1: Just because it's it's more than about the jokes, just
• 1:04:51
  Speaker 1: like about like right people. Even the last time he
• 1:04:55
  Speaker 1: hosted how everybody was like posting pictures with him and
• 1:04:58
  Speaker 1: they're like, Comedy's back. Yeah, And that leads to a
• 1:05:03
  Speaker 1: class of people having opinions on it that aren't typical,
• 1:05:06
  Speaker 1: like quote unquote comedy fans. Right, it leads to like
• 1:05:09
  Speaker 1: Elon Musk being like Comedy's back.
• 1:05:11
  Speaker 4: Did he say comedy was back?
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 1: No, well he just says it every five minutes. They
• 1:05:15
  Speaker 1: made fun of him, and there I know.
• 1:05:17
  Speaker 4: And I thought, I thought that was pretty funny. I
• 1:05:20
  Speaker 4: thought Mike Myers was pretty funny, and I wondered if
• 1:05:23
  Speaker 4: Elon Musk appreciated that. You know, my guess would be
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 4: that Elon did. That's my thought. Has he commented on
• 1:05:35
  Speaker 4: Mike myers portrayal of him?
• 1:05:37
  Speaker 1: He was talking about some like German immigrants getting in
• 1:05:42
  Speaker 1: a fight or something like that.
• 1:05:43
  Speaker 4: Yeah, exactly. I would have thought that Elon Musk somehow
• 1:05:49
  Speaker 4: is probably an Austin Powers fan. Doesn't that seem up
• 1:05:52
  Speaker 4: his alley?
• 1:05:53
  Speaker 1: Of course?
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 4: And that having Mike Myers play him is. I mean,
• 1:05:59
  Speaker 4: Mike Myers is awesome. You know, I haven't seen him
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 4: in fifteen years do anything.
• 1:06:05
  Speaker 1: I didn't love them Mike Meyers either.
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 4: No, I didn't think. I didn't think the voice was
• 1:06:09
  Speaker 4: accurate at all.
• 1:06:10
  Speaker 1: But it is great to have him. And I guess
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 1: because Shrek's back, Oh is it Shrek five's about to
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 1: come out. Really? Yeah?
• 1:06:17
  Speaker 4: Wow, did Elon say anything about Okay? Yeah, I don't know.
• 1:06:23
  Speaker 4: Somehow I would have liked to see that. Elon laughed
• 1:06:27
  Speaker 4: at that, but I guess that's wishful thinking.
• 1:06:31
  Speaker 1: Uh. And then Andrew Schultz and Julia both came out
• 1:06:35
  Speaker 1: of specials.
• 1:06:36
  Speaker 4: We will definitely get Julio on the pod to talk
• 1:06:40
  Speaker 4: about it. I have not had a chance to watch
• 1:06:42
  Speaker 4: either of the specials yet. They just came out either.
• 1:06:45
  Speaker 4: I want to watch them badly.
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, definitely, that'll be sick that they both put put
• 1:06:49
  Speaker 1: stuff out. I can't believe Pete Davidson directed it.
• 1:06:52
  Speaker 4: Julia's yeah, yes, what the fuck?
• 1:06:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah? Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's sick.
• 1:06:57
  Speaker 4: Yeah, their pals.
• 1:06:59
  Speaker 1: And he doesn't have tattoos anymore.
• 1:07:01
  Speaker 4: He got rid of all of them. Yeah, that must
• 1:07:04
  Speaker 4: have been hell.
• 1:07:07
  Speaker 1: I know how did I guess? Don't they just I've
• 1:07:09
  Speaker 1: seen them go over small tattoos with the tattoo remover,
• 1:07:13
  Speaker 1: But that fucking.
• 1:07:14
  Speaker 4: Doesn't it cause scarring? It does, right, but you get
• 1:07:21
  Speaker 4: rid of it all, you're able to get rid of
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 4: all of it.
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 1: I don't know. He looked pretty, he looked milky white.
• 1:07:26
  Speaker 4: Well, I saw that billboard, that gigantic billboard of him
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 4: for Reformation, and it has to be airbrushed because I
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 4: would have thought that his body would look like Jack
• 1:07:37
  Speaker 4: Bowers after he comes home from China or wherever the
• 1:07:40
  Speaker 4: fuck he was tortured in between seasons.
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 1: His body looks pretty good. I did see the Chartletts
• 1:07:47
  Speaker 1: picture of him. He looked fantastic.
• 1:07:49
  Speaker 4: Yeah, uh yeah, he looks good.
• 1:07:54
  Speaker 1: He looks good. Saw some old pictures of him and
• 1:07:56
  Speaker 1: Ariana Grande to be a dime sad.
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 4: What's going on with her?
• 1:08:04
  Speaker 1: I don't know, And I feel like you're not even
• 1:08:07
  Speaker 1: allowed to say that she used to look better.
• 1:08:10
  Speaker 4: Yeah that, Uh, I don't know. I mean sas said,
• 1:08:14
  Speaker 4: I was going to get in trouble for saying that
• 1:08:16
  Speaker 4: Sabrina Carpenter had a round face, which I didn't think
• 1:08:19
  Speaker 4: was true, and one person DMed me in a very
• 1:08:25
  Speaker 4: threatening way as a result of that comment, which to
• 1:08:30
  Speaker 4: me is like, wait a minute, I didn't even say
• 1:08:33
  Speaker 4: anything that bad. How could you love a pop star
• 1:08:37
  Speaker 4: so much as a young man as to take a
• 1:08:40
  Speaker 4: fence at someone saying that they think the contours of
• 1:08:44
  Speaker 4: their face are a little too.
• 1:08:46
  Speaker 1: Maybe it's her.
• 1:08:48
  Speaker 4: Rounded off if she lists. I gotta believe old old Sabs.
• 1:08:52
  Speaker 4: It's nuts.
• 1:08:53
  Speaker 1: Sabs might be listening tuning.
• 1:08:54
  Speaker 4: Into so abed.
• 1:08:57
  Speaker 1: She might be because she's friends with Danielle who played
• 1:09:05
  Speaker 1: to Panga. Danielle Fischal. Danielle's friends with Jensen and I
• 1:09:10
  Speaker 1: went to that bachelor party with Jensen. Wait.
• 1:09:12
  Speaker 4: Friends, aren't they married?
• 1:09:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah? Best friends?
• 1:09:15
  Speaker 4: Okay, Oh you mean in the vow sense. In that
• 1:09:21
  Speaker 4: vow you often hear friendship.
• 1:09:25
  Speaker 1: You know, they take it in sickness and in health. Dude.
• 1:09:28
  Speaker 1: And have you seen the controversy surrounding the Retarched Choice Awards.
• 1:09:32
  Speaker 4: Uh, this keeps popping up on my Twitter. Uh, I
• 1:09:36
  Speaker 4: don't know much about it.
• 1:09:37
  Speaker 1: People are saying that the retarch Choice Awards like that
• 1:09:40
  Speaker 1: they need to revote kick us out because the Retarched
• 1:09:43
  Speaker 1: Choice Awards are losing uh validity because our show is
• 1:09:49
  Speaker 1: doing so well because we made it to the finals
• 1:09:51
  Speaker 1: of the Retart Choice Awards.
• 1:09:53
  Speaker 4: Wouldn't wouldn't you wouldn't we be able to argue that
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 4: that is exactly proving that this is a a poll
• 1:10:01
  Speaker 4: done for retarded people.
• 1:10:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we can't be suddenly, we can't be the King
• 1:10:05
  Speaker 1: of the just because we're elected King of the retards.
• 1:10:07
  Speaker 4: We're not retarded, or I think that's arguably for us
• 1:10:10
  Speaker 4: to beat Tim Dillon and Rogan and theo von to
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 4: me satisfies the conceit of that poll.
• 1:10:21
  Speaker 1: And it's retarded. Yeah, yeah, these guys are mainstream now.
• 1:10:24
  Speaker 1: But so now it's us against the legion of skanks
• 1:10:27
  Speaker 1: in the final.
• 1:10:27
  Speaker 4: Wow, so we beat uh, we beat.
• 1:10:32
  Speaker 1: Warmote, war Mode, we beat Warmode in the semi final.
• 1:10:35
  Speaker 4: That's the one people were the most upset about. I saw.
• 1:10:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, people think it's this is all invalid.
• 1:10:40
  Speaker 4: Now, but but okay, I mean, what's the criteria? What's what?
• 1:10:50
  Speaker 1: What?
• 1:10:50
  Speaker 4: What?
• 1:10:50
  Speaker 2: What?
• 1:10:52
  Speaker 4: Why would they be? This isn't a quality litmus test, right,
• 1:10:59
  Speaker 4: This is the test of quality or popularity. A lot
• 1:11:02
  Speaker 4: of those podcasts are far.
• 1:11:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah, tons of them are more popular. I don't know
• 1:11:08
  Speaker 1: what it is. I don't think I think people just
• 1:11:10
  Speaker 1: cap but I think that it's going to create an
• 1:11:12
  Speaker 1: undercurrent of people who don't like.
• 1:11:14
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I don't want that. That's for damn sure.
• 1:11:17
  Speaker 1: And don't be like this five percent of like comedy
• 1:11:19
  Speaker 1: fans who are like, we know what the actual good
• 1:11:22
  Speaker 1: shit is, but it's it's funny, it's funny that thinking
• 1:11:26
  Speaker 1: that the Retard Choice Awards has it there's like controversy
• 1:11:30
  Speaker 1: because it's invalid because the wrong chards are casting their ballots.
• 1:11:36
  Speaker 4: The retards are circling back with a fake mustache on
• 1:11:40
  Speaker 4: to vote again.
• 1:11:41
  Speaker 1: Well, I think the question is do they think that
• 1:11:42
  Speaker 1: people who are voting for us are too retarded or
• 1:11:45
  Speaker 1: not retarded enough?
• 1:11:48
  Speaker 4: Oh, that's interesting.
• 1:11:50
  Speaker 1: Do you know what I mean?
• 1:11:52
  Speaker 4: That they're doing what Johnny Knoxville did in the Ringer, Yeah,
• 1:11:56
  Speaker 4: to gain an unfair advantage or something or something that's
• 1:12:01
  Speaker 4: tough to say. Yeah, that's tough to say. My guess
• 1:12:04
  Speaker 4: is that these people who are angry are mistaking the
• 1:12:09
  Speaker 4: point of the whole.
• 1:12:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah, don't don't be angry at us. We didn't ask
• 1:12:13
  Speaker 1: for this, this burden of being the choice, no, of
• 1:12:17
  Speaker 1: being the people's champ.
• 1:12:18
  Speaker 4: That said, for some reason, I do want to win.
• 1:12:22
  Speaker 4: I don't know why.
• 1:12:23
  Speaker 1: I wanted to have a good run. But you don't
• 1:12:26
  Speaker 1: want to be I mean just being at the top
• 1:12:27
  Speaker 1: of the mountain and everybody wants to kill you, and
• 1:12:29
  Speaker 1: you just have to go to war. You have to
• 1:12:31
  Speaker 1: go to war at all times. I want to have
• 1:12:33
  Speaker 1: a nice run and then get nipped.
• 1:12:35
  Speaker 4: Yeah, Hey, I got a I got a sports question
• 1:12:37
  Speaker 4: for you.
• 1:12:38
  Speaker 1: Hit me brother. All right.
• 1:12:40
  Speaker 4: So, uh, let's say that you you know, we're going
• 1:12:44
  Speaker 4: to be drafted into the NBA, and you had your
• 1:12:47
  Speaker 4: choice of which team to play for, but your main
• 1:12:51
  Speaker 4: consideration was not winning a title or whatever. It was
• 1:12:56
  Speaker 4: the city that you want to.
• 1:12:58
  Speaker 1: Live in, which I think is a lot of NBA
• 1:13:01
  Speaker 1: players actual main consideration. Motherfuckers want to be in California.
• 1:13:05
  Speaker 1: People want to be in New York, people want to
• 1:13:07
  Speaker 1: be in Miami.
• 1:13:08
  Speaker 4: See that's just to me. To me, that's so shortsighted
• 1:13:14
  Speaker 4: for the first two California, New York and for one
• 1:13:17
  Speaker 4: reason alone, which is taxes. That's true, you live in
• 1:13:21
  Speaker 4: New York, you play for the Knicks. Sure, it's pretty
• 1:13:24
  Speaker 4: historic to suit up and play in Madison Square Garden
• 1:13:28
  Speaker 4: every night. However, you're talking about, you know, based on
• 1:13:33
  Speaker 4: what those guys make, it's you're probably paying fifty percent
• 1:13:38
  Speaker 4: in taxes letter income. Yeah, it's an eighteen percent state
• 1:13:41
  Speaker 4: tax plus an added four plus percent in city. That fundamentally,
• 1:13:47
  Speaker 4: if you play for San Antonio Spurs, the Dallas Mavericks,
• 1:13:53
  Speaker 4: the Miami Heat, fucking any of those teams the Orlando Magic.
• 1:13:59
  Speaker 4: You are not paying any of that. And on top
• 1:14:02
  Speaker 4: of that, rent in New York versus Orlando is what
• 1:14:10
  Speaker 4: seven x for the same apartment.
• 1:14:12
  Speaker 1: It's probably easier to get around faster to get to
• 1:14:14
  Speaker 1: your massive McMansion that you have out there.
• 1:14:17
  Speaker 4: Yeah, you're traveling forty one games of the year, you're
• 1:14:23
  Speaker 4: not even home that often. And basically the season is
• 1:14:27
  Speaker 4: just a complete dedication to being in the office in
• 1:14:32
  Speaker 4: the gym, right.
• 1:14:33
  Speaker 1: I think a lot of it is about the thirties though,
• 1:14:36
  Speaker 1: But these days with flyout culture, you can be in
• 1:14:42
  Speaker 1: Minnesota and you can fly out. I mean, Aunt Edwards
• 1:14:45
  Speaker 1: has had how many kids in the last three years? Oh?
• 1:14:47
  Speaker 7: Has he had more?
• 1:14:48
  Speaker 1: Now? Oh? Yeah, he's having a ton of kids and
• 1:14:51
  Speaker 1: he's finding a way to have sex. And he's in Minnesota.
• 1:14:54
  Speaker 4: Yeah exactly, because exactly that's about as remote of a
• 1:14:59
  Speaker 4: mark as you could choose.
• 1:15:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Oklahoma City, you know, and I'm sure there's thought
• 1:15:04
  Speaker 1: he's in Oklahoma City. These women will get there somehow.
• 1:15:09
  Speaker 1: Flyout culture it exists. But for whatever reason, I think
• 1:15:14
  Speaker 1: that guys just want to be in like Beverly Hills,
• 1:15:17
  Speaker 1: you know.
• 1:15:17
  Speaker 4: Yeah, they want to retire there it's waiting a mass
• 1:15:22
  Speaker 4: as much money as you can so that you can
• 1:15:24
  Speaker 4: buy yourself a far better house in Beverly Hills when
• 1:15:27
  Speaker 4: you're thirty four years old.
• 1:15:30
  Speaker 1: When yeah, when you retire at thirty four, my god.
• 1:15:34
  Speaker 1: But they I mean, I think a lot of NBA
• 1:15:36
  Speaker 1: players don't consider that they'll make less money out of
• 1:15:40
  Speaker 1: the NBA, you know what I mean. They're like making
• 1:15:44
  Speaker 1: twenty million dollars and they're like, oh, I'll probably make
• 1:15:46
  Speaker 1: twenty million dollars every year. I think that that's actually
• 1:15:50
  Speaker 1: a very human thing that people don't. People always think
• 1:15:53
  Speaker 1: of it as always going up, and they don't consider
• 1:15:55
  Speaker 1: it that like they might people will peak earning wise.
• 1:15:59
  Speaker 4: I always think about how this may be the most
• 1:16:02
  Speaker 4: money I'm ever going to make, which is why I
• 1:16:04
  Speaker 4: try to spend it as much as possible, because I
• 1:16:09
  Speaker 4: don't know that next year i'll have this money.
• 1:16:11
  Speaker 1: You might not have it to spend.
• 1:16:12
  Speaker 4: I might not have it to spend.
• 1:16:13
  Speaker 1: Exactly, you don't want to, and you're just going to
• 1:16:15
  Speaker 1: carry it around to next year when you're making less money,
• 1:16:18
  Speaker 1: and then the money's even.
• 1:16:19
  Speaker 4: More precious, you know, It's sad. I would be in
• 1:16:21
  Speaker 4: a year if I were making half my income to
• 1:16:23
  Speaker 4: walk by Brunello's sample sale.
• 1:16:26
  Speaker 1: To not be able to go and buy like twenty
• 1:16:28
  Speaker 1: items at a Brunello sample sale. Correct to not be
• 1:16:31
  Speaker 1: able to drop five figures at a Brunello sample sale.
• 1:16:34
  Speaker 4: Do the next one I'm looking for? And by the way,
• 1:16:37
  Speaker 4: this is a problem. Oh Diana Beers, he mister Beers.
• 1:16:41
  Speaker 1: If it's so, it's up my brothers.
• 1:16:44
  Speaker 4: Mister Beers is here. Get the beers a queers.
• 1:16:49
  Speaker 1: We needed you for just like a little bit of time,
• 1:16:52
  Speaker 1: just because we don't have sasquatch and you guys are
• 1:16:54
  Speaker 1: basically the same person.
• 1:16:56
  Speaker 10: Yeah, doesn't he complain a lot?
• 1:16:59
  Speaker 4: Though?
• 1:17:00
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I guess you're better. You're better about that.
• 1:17:02
  Speaker 7: I don't think I really complained.
• 1:17:04
  Speaker 6: Mm hmm.
• 1:17:05
  Speaker 4: I can get I can get you complaining. Sure, I
• 1:17:07
  Speaker 4: know some things, some hot button issues.
• 1:17:09
  Speaker 1: Talk to me.
• 1:17:10
  Speaker 4: It'll get you complaining.
• 1:17:11
  Speaker 7: Talk to me. Well.
• 1:17:12
  Speaker 4: The big item of note is that your wedding is
• 1:17:15
  Speaker 4: fast approaching.
• 1:17:16
  Speaker 10: I was just talking for solely about it back on
• 1:17:18
  Speaker 10: the Oh you are frunch time, so we got a
• 1:17:21
  Speaker 10: fast We're in the red zone right now. I've stole
• 1:17:23
  Speaker 10: that from him. We're in the red zone.
• 1:17:26
  Speaker 1: Really and so what are you going? What the fuck
• 1:17:28
  Speaker 1: are you gonna do? Wait?
• 1:17:29
  Speaker 10: The red zone meaning break myself with fucking fat, lost drugs.
• 1:17:33
  Speaker 4: Are you in the red zone in the sense that
• 1:17:35
  Speaker 4: your scale has a black range and then when it
• 1:17:38
  Speaker 4: goes too high it turns into the red Yes, dude,
• 1:17:41
  Speaker 4: like an engine.
• 1:17:42
  Speaker 1: What's there? What's the goals? What's the goals for? How
• 1:17:44
  Speaker 1: much that you want to?
• 1:17:46
  Speaker 7: Like?
• 1:17:46
  Speaker 1: Where are you and where do you want to be?
• 1:17:48
  Speaker 10: I weighed myself this morning. I'm down two pounds in
• 1:17:51
  Speaker 10: one week on no zampic. That's sixty nine. I'd like
• 1:17:55
  Speaker 10: to be two fifty.
• 1:17:57
  Speaker 4: Two sixty nine. It is huge. It's not we talked
• 1:18:01
  Speaker 4: about this, is it really?
• 1:18:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah? We we we?
• 1:18:03
  Speaker 4: Uh six, Dana was in Dana was in Myrtle Beach
• 1:18:07
  Speaker 4: and he and I shared a golf cart and uh,
• 1:18:11
  Speaker 4: you know, by the time that we returned it to
• 1:18:14
  Speaker 4: the cart boys, he didn't even have to step off.
• 1:18:18
  Speaker 4: His side was flushed to the ground. No, it was
• 1:18:21
  Speaker 4: like a yeah, it was just like a ramp.
• 1:18:23
  Speaker 1: I wish that was true.
• 1:18:24
  Speaker 7: That'd be fucking sick.
• 1:18:25
  Speaker 1: That would be fucking sick. I think that is attainable.
• 1:18:30
  Speaker 7: It is, I've done it.
• 1:18:30
  Speaker 10: Before the first time I went on the big Oh
• 1:18:32
  Speaker 10: I got there, I got to the two forties. What
• 1:18:35
  Speaker 10: abouts the skydiving? Wait, you can't skydive over.
• 1:18:39
  Speaker 7: Two fifty.
• 1:18:41
  Speaker 1: And uh, they didn't let you. They didn't let your
• 1:18:43
  Speaker 1: sky do.
• 1:18:43
  Speaker 4: What's crazy is that they didn't let you skydive and
• 1:18:45
  Speaker 4: you were what two fifty five or something like that? No, God, oh,
• 1:18:49
  Speaker 4: you were way over.
• 1:18:49
  Speaker 7: I was big.
• 1:18:51
  Speaker 1: I was eight. Oh, dude, that was the fastest I've
• 1:18:56
  Speaker 1: ever been.
• 1:18:56
  Speaker 4: I'd like to see you at three hundred pounds. I
• 1:18:58
  Speaker 4: want you to go in one direction of the other
• 1:19:00
  Speaker 4: and I could. I don't want you to be where
• 1:19:02
  Speaker 4: you're at.
• 1:19:04
  Speaker 1: I mean, she.
• 1:19:06
  Speaker 7: Definitely loves me, no matter what.
• 1:19:09
  Speaker 1: But like like a voice quiver, I'm just thinking about
• 1:19:14
  Speaker 1: me being three hundred pounds.
• 1:19:15
  Speaker 4: Maybe she might note, is not that far away? Is
• 1:19:18
  Speaker 4: the thing? I think you would wear it fine?
• 1:19:21
  Speaker 1: You would wear it fine.
• 1:19:22
  Speaker 4: I think you'd wear it fine.
• 1:19:23
  Speaker 1: Well, you being that big or not?
• 1:19:27
  Speaker 7: It's all my fucking ass.
• 1:19:29
  Speaker 1: I a humongous ass, which is nice. That's the best
• 1:19:32
  Speaker 1: place to carry weights, but not for a guy. Yes,
• 1:19:35
  Speaker 1: it is guy's asses.
• 1:19:38
  Speaker 10: Actually, the pants I'm wearing today, look at the look
• 1:19:41
  Speaker 10: at his ass.
• 1:19:41
  Speaker 1: Oh my god, Oh my god, it did bounce, bro,
• 1:19:46
  Speaker 1: it did jiggle. That's fucking wild.
• 1:19:49
  Speaker 4: It's not my type.
• 1:19:50
  Speaker 10: It's unsettling. It's all in my legs. I have trunks,
• 1:19:54
  Speaker 10: I got good legs, actually have squads.
• 1:19:57
  Speaker 1: No, never, you probably could though, probably couldn't. Fucking squat
• 1:20:01
  Speaker 1: like a demon his stomach.
• 1:20:03
  Speaker 10: Hind legs, ass, hind legs.
• 1:20:08
  Speaker 4: What are you a centaur? Fucking woodland creature?
• 1:20:12
  Speaker 1: Hind?
• 1:20:15
  Speaker 7: I have thick hind legs.
• 1:20:17
  Speaker 1: So, so what's your plan to get the like, what
• 1:20:19
  Speaker 1: are you gonna do differently this time?
• 1:20:21
  Speaker 10: On the Oh, I've been crushing orange theory.
• 1:20:24
  Speaker 1: Okay, that's really good.
• 1:20:25
  Speaker 7: Yeah, it's like a thousand I do.
• 1:20:27
  Speaker 10: I try to beat everyone in calories, but then I
• 1:20:30
  Speaker 10: realized I'm just way bigger than everyone.
• 1:20:32
  Speaker 7: It's like it's like fifty year old woman.
• 1:20:34
  Speaker 1: It's a little bit easier to be like them when
• 1:20:36
  Speaker 1: they're like one hundred yeah flat.
• 1:20:38
  Speaker 10: Yeah. I do that like a couple of times a week.
• 1:20:42
  Speaker 1: And then diet. Just let the let the beard, let
• 1:20:46
  Speaker 1: the drugs.
• 1:20:47
  Speaker 4: Do their work. You act like it's gonna melt it
• 1:20:53
  Speaker 4: off of you. Yeah, it just it does appetite suppressant yeah, but.
• 1:20:58
  Speaker 10: There was a point where I was trying to beat
• 1:21:00
  Speaker 10: the drug in it. I beat it like I gained
• 1:21:02
  Speaker 10: the weight on his unpick. But that's what I just
• 1:21:05
  Speaker 10: didn't care. I was like, I don't care. Now I
• 1:21:09
  Speaker 10: can tell it's it's flowing through me. And I had
• 1:21:11
  Speaker 10: a few beers the other day and I was like, whoa,
• 1:21:13
  Speaker 10: I don't feel very good and I couldn't really, I
• 1:21:16
  Speaker 10: couldn't go full throttle like I usually do with the beers. Yeah,
• 1:21:19
  Speaker 10: it affects your drinking for sure. That's brutal. That's why
• 1:21:22
  Speaker 10: I got off of it because I was like, I
• 1:21:24
  Speaker 10: want to get fucked up a lot.
• 1:21:26
  Speaker 4: What are you gonna do if, like, I can't make
• 1:21:29
  Speaker 4: this kind of a sacrifice asking too much?
• 1:21:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, what are you gonna do with your like tucks
• 1:21:36
  Speaker 1: and stuff?
• 1:21:39
  Speaker 7: What do you mean?
• 1:21:40
  Speaker 1: Like? Is it what? What size? Like?
• 1:21:42
  Speaker 10: Are you locked in on the size? I got sized?
• 1:21:45
  Speaker 10: And I told the lady that I was gonna be skinnier.
• 1:21:47
  Speaker 1: Okay, she probably hears that every fucking day, but I did.
• 1:21:52
  Speaker 10: I was like, I'm gonna be skinnier in a few months,
• 1:21:54
  Speaker 10: so don't lock these in yet. And she was like
• 1:21:56
  Speaker 10: all right, and she's just like getting me a walk
• 1:21:59
  Speaker 10: in and rode.
• 1:22:00
  Speaker 1: I'bout like a My waist is a forty right now? Okay, great,
• 1:22:04
  Speaker 1: don't lock these in yet? Is a crazy thing to
• 1:22:06
  Speaker 1: tell your tailor. They very much need to like not
• 1:22:10
  Speaker 1: lock the exact numbers in. Yeah, they have to lock
• 1:22:13
  Speaker 1: it in. That's a good voyt. Yeah.
• 1:22:17
  Speaker 10: Yeah, I'm wearing a black talk, just a nice black talk.
• 1:22:20
  Speaker 7: It's nothing crazy.
• 1:22:21
  Speaker 1: It'll be good.
• 1:22:22
  Speaker 7: He told me would have worn something nuts.
• 1:22:24
  Speaker 4: Is it a black tie wedding?
• 1:22:26
  Speaker 1: No? Okay, Jay, you know, wear whatever you want. The
• 1:22:30
  Speaker 1: bachelor party, Marty's bachelor party looks so fucking funny, and
• 1:22:34
  Speaker 1: then yours is coming up, right.
• 1:22:35
  Speaker 10: I have back to back Bachelor I'm leaving tomorrow for another,
• 1:22:39
  Speaker 10: which is like a tough feeling, like you just recover
• 1:22:41
  Speaker 10: from the last one and then you got a goat
• 1:22:44
  Speaker 10: a flight to another one. Uh, it was fun. Mine
• 1:22:47
  Speaker 10: is in April. What are you laughing at?
• 1:22:50
  Speaker 4: I forget what the question was. Mine is in April
• 1:22:54
  Speaker 4: early April, your home for a day between bachelor parties.
• 1:22:58
  Speaker 7: I know it's like a soccer dude. Uh, but I'm
• 1:23:02
  Speaker 7: gonna get back on the horse.
• 1:23:04
  Speaker 1: After your series of Bachelor Parties series.
• 1:23:07
  Speaker 7: The best part about that.
• 1:23:08
  Speaker 10: Series was I didn't I didn't even consider any of
• 1:23:10
  Speaker 10: the places I went.
• 1:23:13
  Speaker 1: Because you checked him off already. You literally have lived
• 1:23:16
  Speaker 1: the bachelor party there. You don't have to. Yeah, where
• 1:23:18
  Speaker 1: are you going for yours?
• 1:23:19
  Speaker 7: For Lottie?
• 1:23:20
  Speaker 1: That's gonna be sick. Yeah, Martin looked so fun.
• 1:23:23
  Speaker 10: It was a good time. It was an interesting I've
• 1:23:26
  Speaker 10: never seen that before. The two the two combinations or
• 1:23:29
  Speaker 10: the combination of two parties.
• 1:23:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it was fun. It's cool. Yeah, but so so
• 1:23:34
  Speaker 1: your fiance was there too.
• 1:23:36
  Speaker 7: She was she's friends with rha was a nice little
• 1:23:39
  Speaker 7: treat she was on. It was a nice treat.
• 1:23:42
  Speaker 1: This is the marquee. That was the marquee bachelor slash
• 1:23:46
  Speaker 1: bachelorette event in barstool history this past weekend. Yeah, Eddie
• 1:23:51
  Speaker 1: was there, Hubs Smokes. Did Smokes tell you about anything?
• 1:23:55
  Speaker 1: He said that in a.
• 1:23:56
  Speaker 10: Moment, Well, I know Tommy talks a lot about moments.
• 1:24:00
  Speaker 10: He had a real moment in beer pong.
• 1:24:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Baseball baseball, Yeah, what happened?
• 1:24:05
  Speaker 10: We were down thirteen to five in the eighth inning,
• 1:24:09
  Speaker 10: bottom of the eighth What do they laughing? That story
• 1:24:15
  Speaker 10: is funny. There are now thirteen to five. In the
• 1:24:17
  Speaker 10: bottom of the eighth inning, we're fucking down and out.
• 1:24:20
  Speaker 10: We need eight runs to just tie it up. We're
• 1:24:22
  Speaker 10: getting single, single singles. Tommy steps up for and he's like, boys,
• 1:24:27
  Speaker 10: I'm gonna hit a grand slam right now.
• 1:24:28
  Speaker 1: Hits the grand slam. We're down thirteen to nine.
• 1:24:32
  Speaker 7: A couple hits, a couple of hits, a couple of hits.
• 1:24:34
  Speaker 7: We're just chipping away.
• 1:24:36
  Speaker 1: Tommy. She keeps hitting cups.
• 1:24:37
  Speaker 10: He hits the go ahead, he goes, I'm gonna hit
• 1:24:39
  Speaker 10: the go ahead homer right now, bangs it and we
• 1:24:42
  Speaker 10: go up fourteen thirteen. We called him eighth inning Tommy
• 1:24:44
  Speaker 10: all weekend. That's that's like eighth inning Tommy. We couldn't
• 1:24:50
  Speaker 10: stop calling him that.
• 1:24:52
  Speaker 1: So he's in the he's in the conversation for MVP.
• 1:24:56
  Speaker 1: I heard Jeff Lowe is in the conversation.
• 1:24:58
  Speaker 10: Je is I've never seen anything like it on ever.
• 1:25:04
  Speaker 10: He ordered four deliveries in a span of two hours.
• 1:25:07
  Speaker 10: The second we got there, he delivered a drink mixer,
• 1:25:11
  Speaker 10: set of air mattress sprite in a smoothie, all separately
• 1:25:18
  Speaker 10: within two hours. Said he was ordering chapsticks. He just
• 1:25:21
  Speaker 10: orders whatever, he wants, he just go puffs it.
• 1:25:24
  Speaker 7: It's there.
• 1:25:25
  Speaker 1: I guess that is the future.
• 1:25:28
  Speaker 10: Everyone was calling Eddie the LVP, which I don't love,
• 1:25:32
  Speaker 10: only because he.
• 1:25:32
  Speaker 7: Was he was snooping a lot.
• 1:25:34
  Speaker 1: He was taking a lot of that's yeah, a lot
• 1:25:38
  Speaker 1: of snoopers. Sometimes you need that.
• 1:25:40
  Speaker 7: So I got it into it with GB for for
• 1:25:43
  Speaker 7: a moment.
• 1:25:43
  Speaker 1: What happened with you and Glenny?
• 1:25:45
  Speaker 10: He's just always giving me shit. It's like we were tired.
• 1:25:47
  Speaker 10: Everyone was sitting on the couch.
• 1:25:48
  Speaker 1: He's like, I want to go out. I want to
• 1:25:49
  Speaker 1: go out.
• 1:25:50
  Speaker 10: You know, Glenn balls just all he wants to do
• 1:25:51
  Speaker 10: is go out and get pussy. You're with a bunch
• 1:25:53
  Speaker 10: of fucking engaged men, like nobody wants to really go
• 1:25:55
  Speaker 10: out with a group of sixteen guys. And he's just like, Dana,
• 1:26:00
  Speaker 10: aren't you going out? I'm like, dude, I don't. I
• 1:26:01
  Speaker 10: don't want to go out right now. And of course,
• 1:26:03
  Speaker 10: of the couch, of all the guys that didn't want
• 1:26:05
  Speaker 10: to go out, he picked on me.
• 1:26:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's bullshit by Glenny. Just take single guys, take
• 1:26:10
  Speaker 1: fucking smokes. Yeah exactly.
• 1:26:14
  Speaker 7: But we got over it and we were fine.
• 1:26:16
  Speaker 1: The next day I heard that, uh, that Marty's brother
• 1:26:19
  Speaker 1: did a great job with the finding the restaurants, stuff
• 1:26:23
  Speaker 1: like that. I get. I mean, I love Nicky mush.
• 1:26:27
  Speaker 1: I don't think you did a single thing. I was
• 1:26:30
  Speaker 1: trying to give him flowers.
• 1:26:33
  Speaker 10: You might have gotten the reservation, but even then I
• 1:26:35
  Speaker 10: was like, hey, great job on the reservation, and he
• 1:26:38
  Speaker 10: like hesitated and he was like, oh, thank you, So.
• 1:26:41
  Speaker 7: It didn't sound like he actually did that.
• 1:26:46
  Speaker 1: We love him too, We love him too. I was
• 1:26:47
  Speaker 1: just trying to find out who the m v P. Obviously,
• 1:26:49
  Speaker 1: I would say Marty and Rio obviously.
• 1:26:54
  Speaker 4: Yeah, Tommy.
• 1:26:55
  Speaker 7: I guess fine.
• 1:26:57
  Speaker 1: I hate to hear that. I know, and he's gonna
• 1:27:00
  Speaker 1: fucking love I'll get it to Tommy. That's so fucking brutal.
• 1:27:04
  Speaker 1: What's the moving, Lottie, how's the how's the schedule gonna
• 1:27:07
  Speaker 1: be different? Down there?
• 1:27:09
  Speaker 10: Thursday, get in, get fucked up, Friday, golf, get fucked
• 1:27:15
  Speaker 10: up at golf, and then get fucked up after Saturday.
• 1:27:20
  Speaker 7: Get fucked up, go to the casino.
• 1:27:23
  Speaker 1: That's it. That sounds perfect, What a fun idea, that
• 1:27:28
  Speaker 1: sounds perfect.
• 1:27:29
  Speaker 4: I wonder how you're gonna get to all of those things.
• 1:27:32
  Speaker 4: We love cars, but we're not gonna I'm not just kidding.
• 1:27:35
  Speaker 4: That didn't logistically sound difficult at all, doesn't sound over booked.
• 1:27:40
  Speaker 1: How are you gonna get to get.
• 1:27:42
  Speaker 7: As a weekend?
• 1:27:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah?
• 1:27:44
  Speaker 10: All I need is my boys in an airbnb. I
• 1:27:47
  Speaker 10: don't need anything else in this world as such. That's
• 1:27:50
  Speaker 10: all I need. Maybe a table, you.
• 1:27:54
  Speaker 1: Know, you mean it like a club or like just
• 1:27:57
  Speaker 1: like a plastic table table service.
• 1:28:03
  Speaker 10: Oh god, evans, no a club table. Fuck out of here.
• 1:28:08
  Speaker 10: No a plastic table.
• 1:28:09
  Speaker 1: So you just need your boys and a plastic table.
• 1:28:13
  Speaker 7: Maybe a dice, dude.
• 1:28:16
  Speaker 4: I will say this, my buddy, and this is probably
• 1:28:19
  Speaker 4: like eight years ago now, but uh, I went. I
• 1:28:23
  Speaker 4: went to Atlantic City for the weekend with a big
• 1:28:26
  Speaker 4: group of people and there were a bunch of couples, bunch.
• 1:28:30
  Speaker 4: I think I was single at the time, and my
• 1:28:32
  Speaker 4: other buddy was also single. So we were the only
• 1:28:34
  Speaker 4: two single guys the whole weekend, and we didn't care
• 1:28:39
  Speaker 4: about anything and everybody else. The minute we got into
• 1:28:43
  Speaker 4: the house, a big, big shared house, everybody was plaining
• 1:28:47
  Speaker 4: about if they got the right bedroom. You know, who
• 1:28:51
  Speaker 4: felt like shorted on that, you know, complaining about all
• 1:28:56
  Speaker 4: these things we brought ping pong paddles, and we had
• 1:29:00
  Speaker 4: there was this big round table, it was kind of
• 1:29:02
  Speaker 4: oval table, and we just started playing two cups, the
• 1:29:06
  Speaker 4: type of beer pong that we played in college, where
• 1:29:09
  Speaker 4: you you know, try to hit the ball into the cups.
• 1:29:11
  Speaker 4: And we did that. I mean, I guess we left
• 1:29:15
  Speaker 4: the house a couple of times, but we didn't need to.
• 1:29:19
  Speaker 4: And everybody else around us was getting ready or you know,
• 1:29:25
  Speaker 4: calling ubers, wondering what should we do? How are we
• 1:29:28
  Speaker 4: gonna split wise this bill? We just we're at the table.
• 1:29:35
  Speaker 4: That's nice sound.
• 1:29:37
  Speaker 1: Some people have to turn their brain off. Everybody can't
• 1:29:39
  Speaker 1: be like hovering or trying to figure shit out. Dude.
• 1:29:42
  Speaker 4: It was. It was so amazing the contrast between our
• 1:29:47
  Speaker 4: stress and our lack of stress and the stress of
• 1:29:50
  Speaker 4: everyone else.
• 1:29:50
  Speaker 10: Some of my favorite nights in the history of my
• 1:29:53
  Speaker 10: life have been sitting on a couch with my best
• 1:29:55
  Speaker 10: friend from home.
• 1:29:56
  Speaker 1: We just got a thirty rack.
• 1:29:58
  Speaker 10: We just sat there, got fucked up and like argued
• 1:30:01
  Speaker 10: about like basketball.
• 1:30:03
  Speaker 4: That's cool, I do. I like that, But I like
• 1:30:06
  Speaker 4: to do something yeah, yeah, I like to you know,
• 1:30:09
  Speaker 4: I like to play a little beer pong, or or
• 1:30:11
  Speaker 4: even if it were to play cards while we're talking.
• 1:30:15
  Speaker 1: Maybe you guys just didn't have a table then we did.
• 1:30:19
  Speaker 1: Was there a table?
• 1:30:22
  Speaker 10: I'm trying to think, because we used to go to
• 1:30:24
  Speaker 10: that house all the time and there wasn't really.
• 1:30:26
  Speaker 7: A good table.
• 1:30:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly, so you could have a good time right here. Yeah,
• 1:30:32
  Speaker 1: and we just so that was basically damn near the table.
• 1:30:34
  Speaker 7: Yeah, pretty much.
• 1:30:35
  Speaker 4: That's great.
• 1:30:36
  Speaker 1: That is such a nice time. Yeah, such a nice time.
• 1:30:39
  Speaker 7: Heated arguments. We would just fucking yell.
• 1:30:42
  Speaker 10: At each other about like Kobe versus fucking Lebron, like
• 1:30:47
  Speaker 10: fifteen beers deep. And I would go to bed and
• 1:30:50
  Speaker 10: a couple of times what you threw up? No, I
• 1:30:53
  Speaker 10: pissed his couch. A few times you pissed his couch.
• 1:30:58
  Speaker 10: You were sleeping on it? Yeah, I damn near lived
• 1:31:01
  Speaker 10: at this man's house. Yeah, and I would. I would
• 1:31:04
  Speaker 10: fall asleep on the couch a lot.
• 1:31:05
  Speaker 1: Got it. What kind of couch was? It was a
• 1:31:07
  Speaker 1: pretty nice was it like a family couch or couch?
• 1:31:10
  Speaker 1: That's fine? Then pissed the couch that's part of it,
• 1:31:14
  Speaker 1: like the fake leathery like kind of shit couch.
• 1:31:18
  Speaker 7: It's been probably two years.
• 1:31:21
  Speaker 1: This might be too much of an ask, but do
• 1:31:22
  Speaker 1: you think that you're gonna consummate your marriage on your
• 1:31:26
  Speaker 1: wedding night?
• 1:31:27
  Speaker 10: I think he asked me that on our show, And
• 1:31:30
  Speaker 10: forget what I said. I said, I don't know. I
• 1:31:34
  Speaker 10: have a piece of advice. Oh you mean like have
• 1:31:37
  Speaker 10: a baby? No, no, just have sex.
• 1:31:39
  Speaker 1: Oh uh maybe, Well, Mia, I says, are you going
• 1:31:43
  Speaker 1: to be too fucked up? Have sex? Oh? Yes, for sure.
• 1:31:47
  Speaker 4: Right, So that's why my advice would be, on the
• 1:31:49
  Speaker 4: day of your wedding, you have morning sex. Okay, yeah,
• 1:31:54
  Speaker 4: not wake up, you get it out of the way.
• 1:31:56
  Speaker 10: I mean, I'm the biggest I'm the biggest whiskey dick
• 1:31:58
  Speaker 10: guy you'll ever meet.
• 1:32:00
  Speaker 1: So like, it's not gonna happen. Ye, same, you know, Jane,
• 1:32:06
  Speaker 1: I get whiskey dick sober, but it didn't happen for me.
• 1:32:10
  Speaker 7: I get water.
• 1:32:11
  Speaker 4: It's it's also it's also at the end of your
• 1:32:13
  Speaker 4: wedding by the time you get into water dick just
• 1:32:18
  Speaker 4: to see cucumber.
• 1:32:20
  Speaker 7: I literally get water dick.
• 1:32:22
  Speaker 4: You can't even keep it in your hands.
• 1:32:24
  Speaker 1: Milk dick, just any type of any anything you drink
• 1:32:28
  Speaker 1: makes your dick not work.
• 1:32:31
  Speaker 4: Oh ship, I got the coffee dick.
• 1:32:33
  Speaker 1: I have coffee, Dick, I had coffee this morning.
• 1:32:35
  Speaker 4: Oh no, I'm gonna need some time. That red bull
• 1:32:39
  Speaker 4: is going straight.
• 1:32:40
  Speaker 7: To my dick.
• 1:32:41
  Speaker 1: I'm sorry, babe, you know how I get.
• 1:32:44
  Speaker 4: That's funny. Uh, but but I was gonna say, you'll
• 1:32:48
  Speaker 4: also be tired. You'll be really, really tired. Sure, so
• 1:32:52
  Speaker 4: you'll want to just pass out.
• 1:32:54
  Speaker 7: What's your plan for my wedding?
• 1:32:57
  Speaker 4: Uh? We were talking about it.
• 1:32:58
  Speaker 1: You book, you book anything?
• 1:33:00
  Speaker 4: Not yet, but I will. I'm going to.
• 1:33:01
  Speaker 7: I think invites are coming out today.
• 1:33:03
  Speaker 4: Oh, that's fun. I'm going to. I'll probably fly to
• 1:33:07
  Speaker 4: Hyannas as you suggested.
• 1:33:09
  Speaker 7: That's where jfk Uh had a house.
• 1:33:12
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I think Hyas.
• 1:33:14
  Speaker 7: He died or something.
• 1:33:16
  Speaker 1: Not him.
• 1:33:17
  Speaker 4: One of his Teddy drove the women into the water, right,
• 1:33:24
  Speaker 4: not jfk one of his boys, but they Kennedy's did.
• 1:33:28
  Speaker 4: That's where they summered.
• 1:33:29
  Speaker 1: Yes, you guys should take pictures at that bridge.
• 1:33:33
  Speaker 10: Yeah, for the vibes that we get in a day earlier.
• 1:33:39
  Speaker 10: You could play some golf. Yeah my home club. Wait
• 1:33:43
  Speaker 10: you want me to do that, I can say it
• 1:33:45
  Speaker 10: right now. It's not going to happen. That would be Thursday.
• 1:33:48
  Speaker 10: I feel like you'll have weddings. Yeah, you got too much?
• 1:33:52
  Speaker 1: Sorry, maybe a couple of days early, Yeah, Wednesday due?
• 1:33:56
  Speaker 1: How nice is it have them for around?
• 1:33:58
  Speaker 7: He's the best?
• 1:34:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I missed last. What do you thick boy?
• 1:34:02
  Speaker 4: What are you using for?
• 1:34:03
  Speaker 1: That's what we call each other. We call each other thick.
• 1:34:06
  Speaker 1: We were just like, I'm two sixty nine, Like that's huge,
• 1:34:09
  Speaker 1: and I just heard for solely be like, what the
• 1:34:12
  Speaker 1: fuck I'm two fifty five?
• 1:34:15
  Speaker 10: You're you're two fifty five. I would have I mean,
• 1:34:18
  Speaker 10: I would have guessed more. That's not that's not You're
• 1:34:22
  Speaker 10: looking good. That wasn't a chirp. I'm saying you look good.
• 1:34:29
  Speaker 1: Just calling my think boy. You guys have a great Rapportea.
• 1:34:37
  Speaker 1: I love it all right. I'll let you guys get
• 1:34:39
  Speaker 1: to it. I know you guys have stuff to shoot.
• 1:34:41
  Speaker 4: No appreciate it.
• 1:34:42
  Speaker 3: Uh.
• 1:34:42
  Speaker 1: I will be in.
• 1:34:45
  Speaker 4: Where am I? I'll be in New Brunswick on Saturday,
• 1:34:49
  Speaker 4: one night only two shows. Uh. Tickets are almost shout
• 1:34:53
  Speaker 4: for that. So that's Punch Up Dot Live, Slash's else.
• 1:34:57
  Speaker 4: I'm coming to Baltimore March twentieth to the twenty second
• 1:35:01
  Speaker 4: or nineteenth to twenty first, Baltimore. I'll be at the port.
• 1:35:06
  Speaker 4: And I'm adding so many dates. We also have Providence
• 1:35:10
  Speaker 4: in April, Dallas in April, so on and so forth,
• 1:35:15
  Speaker 4: many many places coming tickets at punch up, Dot Live
• 1:35:18
  Speaker 4: slash France itself. Hope to see you there. Anything.
• 1:35:23
  Speaker 7: No, what do you call your listeners nickname?
• 1:35:28
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 1:35:29
  Speaker 4: We don't.
• 1:35:30
  Speaker 1: Just want to say bot of them, bye God, just
• 1:35:32
  Speaker 1: bye guys.
• 1:35:33
  Speaker 4: Yes, you don't have to do that, Dana. Thanks, we're sasas.
• 1:36:00
  Speaker 1: You're not look around. So I looked on up to you.
• 1:36:11
  Speaker 6: Came around. I was only falling one way. I was
• 1:36:21
  Speaker 6: only falling one bad day. We're drifting.
• 1:36:32
  Speaker 1: Fool for was.
• 1:36:37
  Speaker 6: So so then you need summon No, I come along.
• 1:36:49
  Speaker 6: I'm zing falling on. I was zing phoning. I was
• 1:37:00
  Speaker 6: on your phone in one way. I was on your
• 1:37:07
  Speaker 6: phone in line.
• 1:37:11
  Speaker 1: By strange.
• 1:37:17
  Speaker 6: Bee, don't tax I was phoning one way. See just
• 1:37:43
  Speaker 6: a distant the bad basketball top of the call.
• 1:37:48
  Speaker 1: It just a man.
• 1:37:49
  Speaker 6: Not really take my head off, you gussy coplet successful
• 1:38:27
  Speaker 6: by mis change this chi don't. It's just