Latest / Legacy Living with Dr. Gloria Burgess / Keep Going! | Episode #498

Transcript

Keep Going! | Episode #498 · Legacy Living with Dr. Gloria Burgess

0:21
Speaker 1: Hello, and welcome to today's show, Legacy Living, Make Your
0:27
Speaker 1: Life Count. I'm your host, Doctor Gloria Gloria Burgess, international
0:34
Speaker 1: leadership expert and trusted advisor. Welcome to Legacy Living, Make
0:42
Speaker 1: your Life Count. I'm so delighted that you join me today.
0:48
Speaker 1: I have a very special guest on our episode for today.
0:54
Speaker 1: Her name is Desi Payne. Desi is a humorous motivational speaker, trainer,
1:02
Speaker 1: and the stress Less Coach. I love that she loves
1:08
Speaker 1: to inspire leaders and their employees to adjust their attitudes
1:14
Speaker 1: so they will work in a positive environment. As a
1:19
Speaker 1: stress less coach, she helps people let go of the
1:24
Speaker 1: stress that is robbing them of their joy so they
1:29
Speaker 1: can enjoy life. I just love that. I love the
1:33
Speaker 1: idea of it now. Daisy instills joy and laughter into
1:38
Speaker 1: all of her programs. She is also a John Maxwell
1:42
Speaker 1: team member, traveling internationally to coach people to.
1:46
Speaker 2: Be better leaders.
1:48
Speaker 1: She also teaches Youth Max in schools, helping youth become
1:53
Speaker 1: great leaders. Today's topic is all about letting go, a
2:00
Speaker 1: topic that is near and dear to my heart and
2:04
Speaker 1: I can't think of a better person, a better leader,
2:08
Speaker 1: a better human being to address this topic than Desi
2:12
Speaker 1: Pain Now. I met Desi a few years ago. We're
2:18
Speaker 1: both part of the John Maxwell team, and I met
2:21
Speaker 1: Desi as part of a mentoring series for leaders. In fact,
2:26
Speaker 1: I met her because she had been selected from a
2:30
Speaker 1: pool of about twenty thousand or so leaders. That's a
2:35
Speaker 1: lot of folks. She had been selected to be interviewed
2:39
Speaker 1: for the impact that she was making on the world.
2:43
Speaker 1: And when I met Desi and heard her speak about
2:47
Speaker 1: her passion, she was just on fire about it. So
2:52
Speaker 1: I can't wait to host my friend and fabulous colleague,
2:58
Speaker 1: Desi Pain. Now, before I bring Desi in, I want
3:03
Speaker 1: to just take a moment to connect the dots between
3:06
Speaker 1: today's topic, letting go and legacy living. Now, there are
3:12
Speaker 1: many ways that letting go connects to legacy living, which
3:17
Speaker 1: you'll hear more about later in the show. For now,
3:22
Speaker 1: let me just say that legacy living is a way
3:24
Speaker 1: of being and a way of living in the world,
3:28
Speaker 1: so that we make the conscious choice to be the
3:31
Speaker 1: difference we want to see in the world. We make
3:35
Speaker 1: the conscious choice now, not in some distant future. We
3:40
Speaker 1: make that choice day in and day out, three sixty five,
3:44
Speaker 1: twenty four to seven, Okay, again. I'll tell you more
3:49
Speaker 1: about that later. Let me bring in my friend and colleague,
3:54
Speaker 1: Desi pain.
3:59
Speaker 3: Well.
4:00
Speaker 4: I want to welcome you to this podcast.
4:03
Speaker 5: I am so grateful to have you as my very
4:06
Speaker 5: special guest today and I would love to talk with
4:09
Speaker 5: you about what's happening with you right now. I know
4:13
Speaker 5: that we're both dreamers and we're going to focus today.
4:17
Speaker 4: On never giving up on your dreams. So I just
4:21
Speaker 4: again want to welcome you, and would you just tell
4:23
Speaker 4: us a little.
4:24
Speaker 5: Bit about you, Desi and why never giving up on
4:30
Speaker 5: your dreams is important to you.
4:32
Speaker 3: Sure well, thank you Gloria for having me. And I
4:36
Speaker 3: would probably have to say I am a big dreamer.
4:39
Speaker 3: In fact, sometimes my husband just shakes his head when
4:42
Speaker 3: I throw out one of the things or two of
4:45
Speaker 3: the things are a dozen things that I'm going to
4:47
Speaker 3: be planning on doing, and he just again shakes his head,
4:50
Speaker 3: thinking I just can't believe you. And I think I've
4:56
Speaker 3: always been that way, maybe because you know, on the
5:00
Speaker 3: on the dischart on a ID, but but yeah, I
5:04
Speaker 3: am a big dreamer. I love achieving things and adventure
5:09
Speaker 3: and being creative. I think being creative is one of
5:13
Speaker 3: my favorite things to do. If you say, why don't
5:15
Speaker 3: you come up with something new with whatever it is,
5:18
Speaker 3: then you know I'll just run with it. So yeah,
5:21
Speaker 3: I love dreaming big dreams. And the thing is, through
5:25
Speaker 3: the course of my life, I've had to learn not
5:28
Speaker 3: to give up on those dreams because you know what
5:30
Speaker 3: we both face and those are obstacles.
5:33
Speaker 4: Absolutely absolutely, So Taisie, would.
5:36
Speaker 6: You tell us about I know you're a writer and
5:38
Speaker 6: you're a seeker, and you have a fairly recent book
5:42
Speaker 6: out called Do You Work with the Living Dead? I
5:45
Speaker 6: love that title, So can you tell us a little
5:48
Speaker 6: bit about the book?
5:50
Speaker 3: Sure? Well, I started writing that actually a couple of
5:55
Speaker 3: years ago because I started teaching workshops on attitude and
6:00
Speaker 3: workplace and one night I walked through my living room
6:04
Speaker 3: and one of those zombie shows were on. And I
6:09
Speaker 3: don't get into zombies at all, but my husband and
6:12
Speaker 3: my daughter were watching on. I just kind of shook
6:15
Speaker 3: my head, like, oh, I don't believe this. But then
6:18
Speaker 3: the more I thought about it, every time I walked
6:20
Speaker 3: through the room, it just reminded me of people that
6:23
Speaker 3: drag theirselves through the lots through life and have negative,
6:26
Speaker 3: bad attitudes. It was a springboard for even expanding on
6:32
Speaker 3: the workshop that I did, and so I wrote the
6:34
Speaker 3: book and it's pretty much how to survive among lifeless
6:37
Speaker 3: and negative people in the workplace. But then what's interesting
6:41
Speaker 3: is not only is do I give strategies on how
6:44
Speaker 3: to how to, you know, work with these what I
6:47
Speaker 3: call workplace zombies. The book is also about what to
6:52
Speaker 3: do with you get infected. And that's one of the
6:54
Speaker 3: things a lot of people will even approach me with
6:58
Speaker 3: after they've read the book. They say, you know, I've
7:00
Speaker 3: this book because of these people I work with. But
7:02
Speaker 3: then they say this, they say, you know what, when
7:05
Speaker 3: I was reading the book, I came to the realization
7:09
Speaker 3: that I needed to look at myself and I thought, wow,
7:14
Speaker 3: that it was even you know I seen on the
7:16
Speaker 3: cake for me once it was done. But I guess
7:20
Speaker 3: when you go back to dreams, I would say, probably oh,
7:25
Speaker 3: twenty five years ago, if I were to walk into
7:29
Speaker 3: Barnes and Noble bookstore, I would say out loud to
7:33
Speaker 3: anyone that was with me, someday I'm going to have
7:35
Speaker 3: books in the Barnes and Noble bookstore. I and I
7:39
Speaker 3: said that out loud two people for years and years
7:42
Speaker 3: and years and years. So It was actually especially a
7:46
Speaker 3: thrill for me last October when it was published and
7:50
Speaker 3: I was in Cincinnati and I was at the world's
7:53
Speaker 3: largest I mean it's the world's largest Barnes and Noble
7:57
Speaker 3: book sighting. I think there were like twenty six authors
8:00
Speaker 3: there and I forgot to take part of that.
8:02
Speaker 4: Congratulations, thank you.
8:04
Speaker 3: So so that was a huge win for me to,
8:08
Speaker 3: you know, to pug the book published and go through
8:11
Speaker 3: that process. And onyn't you publish one book, you get
8:14
Speaker 3: the bugs to write another and so yes, so I
8:18
Speaker 3: ended up writing book two. Well, good for you.
8:22
Speaker 5: And I know that in your notes you talked about
8:25
Speaker 5: this book being a finalist.
8:27
Speaker 2: A top ten.
8:29
Speaker 3: Yes, yes, so at the probably in the spring, I
8:33
Speaker 3: found out that my book was in a category, a
8:36
Speaker 3: business category to win an award. So it's in like
8:40
Speaker 3: the top ten finalists to win award with the publisher,
8:43
Speaker 3: which is huge if your book wins an award.
8:48
Speaker 4: So tell us more about this, because you know, we
8:51
Speaker 4: all run into people who have negative attitude sometimes, like
8:55
Speaker 4: you said, you know about us, So why did you
8:58
Speaker 4: write this particular book.
9:01
Speaker 3: You know, I am from a family of very negative
9:07
Speaker 3: people and holidays when you know everybody's going to be
9:14
Speaker 3: coming over. It's almost like you put your guard up
9:16
Speaker 3: because you know, you know conversations are going to turn
9:19
Speaker 3: maybe negative or critical. And so that was probably the
9:25
Speaker 3: main reason, you know, secretly writing this book to give
9:29
Speaker 3: to all my different family members. But but you know,
9:35
Speaker 3: it expanded so that you know, it would be able
9:38
Speaker 3: to help people in the workplace. And and it's been
9:42
Speaker 3: awesome because after I've even taught the Workshoper, people have
9:46
Speaker 3: read the book. It's been so nice for people again
9:48
Speaker 3: to say, you know, when I was reading this book,
9:52
Speaker 3: I saw this person and this person and this person,
9:55
Speaker 3: and so people were really able to relate with it.
9:58
Speaker 3: And you know, the st ategies I give, you know,
10:01
Speaker 3: a lot of them are pretty practical. For example, a
10:04
Speaker 3: couple of them are don't descend to another person's level
10:08
Speaker 3: or go to their grave is what I call it.
10:11
Speaker 3: Is because a negative person doesn't want to be the
10:14
Speaker 3: only one negative or griping or complaining. You know, they
10:18
Speaker 3: want to drag other people into it. And just like
10:21
Speaker 3: their secondhand smoke, I believe there's secondhand negativity and if
10:25
Speaker 3: you're around it, you can be sucked into that. And
10:29
Speaker 3: so it's really important to do different things. If you
10:34
Speaker 3: work those kinds of people, or if you see those
10:36
Speaker 3: people in the grocery store, to distance yourself. But then
10:39
Speaker 3: if you can't distance yourself from those people, especially if
10:43
Speaker 3: you work with them, you know. I give some different strategies,
10:47
Speaker 3: but the one I say is probably the most important
10:49
Speaker 3: is to infect them with your own positive attitude. Let
10:55
Speaker 3: you be the one that infects them versus them infecting you.
10:59
Speaker 2: Oh that I love that.
11:01
Speaker 4: And you talk about getting CPR, So what do you
11:05
Speaker 4: mean by that?
11:06
Speaker 3: Yes, you know, if you were to take your pulse
11:10
Speaker 3: right now, you know, I would hope you'd have your pulse.
11:13
Speaker 3: But you know what, I think it's important that we
11:16
Speaker 3: take our attitude pulse. And if we find that we're
11:21
Speaker 3: we're among the ungrateful dead, or we're acting like any
11:25
Speaker 3: of these negative people, then we need CPR. And that
11:28
Speaker 3: CPR is number one. C stands for choice. It's always
11:33
Speaker 3: your choice on how you're going to act. And it's interesting,
11:37
Speaker 3: you know, when I wrote this book, I got this
11:39
Speaker 3: nickname the Attitude Adjuster. And I was in the grocery
11:42
Speaker 3: store one time and it was one of those days
11:45
Speaker 3: when the line for one only one aisle one checkout
11:51
Speaker 3: was open when I was in a hurry and the
11:54
Speaker 3: line was so long, and there was a part of
11:56
Speaker 3: me that just wanted to glare or you know, act like,
12:00
Speaker 3: you know, what is the problem here? And because I
12:03
Speaker 3: knew I had this nickname the attitude adjuster, I thought,
12:07
Speaker 3: you know, you never know who's watching you, and so
12:11
Speaker 3: I thought, you know what, I am going to be cool,
12:13
Speaker 3: calm and collected. In fact, when I get up to
12:16
Speaker 3: the checkout gal, I'm just going to talk to her
12:18
Speaker 3: and ask her how her day's going. And you know,
12:20
Speaker 3: she went on to tell me that they had several
12:23
Speaker 3: people that called up sick. You know, she had no
12:25
Speaker 3: control over that. And so it taught me a lesson
12:28
Speaker 3: that day that you really do have the ability to
12:32
Speaker 3: take control in a situation where your attitude is concerned.
12:36
Speaker 3: So ceased. In CPR, C stands for choice and P
12:39
Speaker 3: stands for perspective. It's so important to always have the
12:46
Speaker 3: right perspective. And you know, I've had the wonderful privilege
12:51
Speaker 3: about a year ago to speak with Nick Voichich at
12:54
Speaker 3: an event in Texas, you know, to fifteen thousand youth.
12:58
Speaker 3: And every time I see Nick, I always think I
13:02
Speaker 3: have so much to be grateful for. I mean, here's
13:05
Speaker 3: Nick kloicha to man without arms and legs. Yes, And
13:09
Speaker 3: and we lose perspective very easily when we get up
13:13
Speaker 3: in the morning not thinking how grateful we should be
13:16
Speaker 3: for every single thing that we have. And if you
13:18
Speaker 3: are grateful, if you have the right perspective, it's going
13:21
Speaker 3: to affect your attitude. And then r in CPR stands
13:25
Speaker 3: for reboot your brain. And uh so, for example, you
13:31
Speaker 3: if your computer is not acting right or it's stuck,
13:35
Speaker 3: you get aggravated with it, and so you have to
13:38
Speaker 3: reboot it. So you have to hit control, alt and delete. Well,
13:41
Speaker 3: that's what you have to do with your you your attitude.
13:45
Speaker 3: You have to reboot your brain. You have to control
13:47
Speaker 3: what you're thinking about, alternate those thoughts with good thoughts
13:51
Speaker 3: and you have and then that that will delete those
13:53
Speaker 3: negative thoughts. So that's a part of rebooting your brain.
13:57
Speaker 3: And then another part of rebooting your brain is humor
14:01
Speaker 3: and laughter, you know, incorporating more humor and laughter into
14:04
Speaker 3: your life, because anytime you laugh, it really does reboot
14:08
Speaker 3: your brain because your brain chemistry change. So so that's
14:11
Speaker 3: essentially CPR for your attitude. H.
14:15
Speaker 7: Well, I love that.
14:16
Speaker 4: And so someone gave you the name of the attitude adjuster.
14:21
Speaker 3: Yeah, I was the H was called the attitude adjuster.
14:25
Speaker 3: So I kind of just span with that for a while.
14:28
Speaker 3: And so so it's on my website, you know, and
14:30
Speaker 3: the attitude adjuster. So yeah, and then it keeps me
14:35
Speaker 3: in line.
14:37
Speaker 4: That's so important as a And I love the CPR approach.
14:42
Speaker 2: Could you go through the C.
14:43
Speaker 7: And the P and the R again because I know
14:45
Speaker 7: that there are.
14:46
Speaker 4: People out there taking taking notes.
14:48
Speaker 3: Okay, sure, m C stands for choice. It's always your
14:55
Speaker 3: choice on what kind of attitude you're going to have.
14:58
Speaker 3: I mean, you choose that attitude no matter what is
15:01
Speaker 3: happening around you. P stands for perspective and a lot
15:07
Speaker 3: of that has to do with gratitude. Then then OUR
15:12
Speaker 3: stands for reboot your brain. And I think there's two
15:15
Speaker 3: ways to reboot your brain. One is to control what
15:20
Speaker 3: you're thinking about in your thoughts. And the other way
15:24
Speaker 3: to reboot your brain is with laughter, because when you
15:27
Speaker 3: do laugh, it does change your attitude, let alone change
15:31
Speaker 3: the chemistry of your brain to make you feel better.
15:35
Speaker 4: Yeah, so thank you, And I know you know, when
15:37
Speaker 4: I think about perspective. This little thought runs through my mind.
15:41
Speaker 4: You know, when we change our perspective or hardly look
15:44
Speaker 4: at things, then the things around us actually begin to change.
15:47
Speaker 3: That's so true, That is right.
15:49
Speaker 4: Yeah, so I hadn't planned out asking you this question.
15:53
Speaker 4: So if you don't want to answer it, just tell
15:55
Speaker 4: me that I love how you talk about, you know,
15:58
Speaker 4: rebooting your brain and you humor right, and you and
16:02
Speaker 4: I had you know, we talked a while ago and
16:05
Speaker 4: another another interview and you talked about your town.
16:11
Speaker 3: Sure sure, sure, sure. So Actually, you know that has
16:17
Speaker 3: a lot to do with the dreams in my life.
16:21
Speaker 3: You know, after I graduated from college, I got a
16:25
Speaker 3: job at a hospital and I did not like it
16:28
Speaker 3: at all. I mean, it was very stressful, but I
16:32
Speaker 3: ended up staying in that job for a very long time.
16:35
Speaker 3: And then after that job, the door opened to another job,
16:39
Speaker 3: which was which is funny, I was the complaint department.
16:42
Speaker 3: But I actually loved that job and it was always challenging.
16:47
Speaker 3: But had I left, had I left that job, I
16:51
Speaker 3: would not have had the opportunity for my life to
16:53
Speaker 3: change because that door opened up to a whole new
16:58
Speaker 3: life for me. Because while I was working at the hospital,
17:00
Speaker 3: there was a professional clown and when I would get
17:04
Speaker 3: complaints from patients, I would, you know, call Hm out
17:07
Speaker 3: and say, I mean he was on staff. I'd say, hey,
17:09
Speaker 3: I need to go see this this patient because they're
17:12
Speaker 3: really grumpy. And he would go in do his magic
17:14
Speaker 3: and it was amazing. Well, one night he was at
17:19
Speaker 3: a banquet where I was actually performing as the entertainer
17:25
Speaker 3: and I was a mine and I did my mind
17:28
Speaker 3: skit and he came up to me. I mean he
17:31
Speaker 3: made a beeline write up to me afterwards, and he
17:33
Speaker 3: asked me, who taught you how to do that? And
17:36
Speaker 3: I said to do what He said, well, what you
17:38
Speaker 3: did on the stage. And I said, I don't know.
17:40
Speaker 3: I just I don't know taught myself. I did it.
17:43
Speaker 3: And he said, have you ever thought about going to
17:45
Speaker 3: clown college? And I thought, oh, my goodness, that is
17:48
Speaker 3: the dumbest thing I've ever heard. And my husband, my
17:51
Speaker 3: husband hates clowns. That is crazy. Well, he kind of
17:56
Speaker 3: kept at me, and finally one day he throws a
18:00
Speaker 3: sure on my desk and he says, the University of
18:02
Speaker 3: Wisconsin is going to have a clown college experience up
18:07
Speaker 3: in Des Moines, Iowa. I'm about an hour and a
18:10
Speaker 3: half from there, and he said, why don't you go,
18:11
Speaker 3: And I thought, oh, now, I'll just go. I'm sure
18:14
Speaker 3: I can learn how to do a blue animal for
18:16
Speaker 3: my Sunday school class. Well, little did I know going
18:20
Speaker 3: to that clown college experience, which was for a clown college,
18:26
Speaker 3: it changed my life and I to make a long
18:29
Speaker 3: story short, I went to clown school and I was
18:32
Speaker 3: able to be trained by professional entertainers from around the
18:37
Speaker 3: world who understood the art of clowning, not just throwing
18:41
Speaker 3: on makeup and going out and being goofy, but actually
18:44
Speaker 3: the art of a clown. So I became a professional
18:48
Speaker 3: clown and he actually wanted to mentor me to take
18:51
Speaker 3: his place at the hospital, which I ended up doing
18:54
Speaker 3: for twenty two years. Actually retired from the hospital as
18:59
Speaker 3: from a professional last December. But you know, I saw
19:03
Speaker 3: cancer patients kids, I've worked in the emergency room.
19:06
Speaker 2: I see.
19:06
Speaker 3: I worked all over that hospital as a as a
19:09
Speaker 3: professional clown, and then little did I know, doors were
19:14
Speaker 3: going to open. I ended up being a guest performer
19:16
Speaker 3: with Ringling Brothers. I worked on Royal Career bringing cruise
19:21
Speaker 3: lines and I was in high demand for schools to
19:25
Speaker 3: come and teach kids about character anti bullying. And so
19:30
Speaker 3: I mean I worked literally full time, a lot of
19:34
Speaker 3: times fight and six days a week in clown makeup.
19:37
Speaker 3: And I did that. I mean it was a very,
19:40
Speaker 3: very rewarding, rewarding occupation. And with all that said, I
19:45
Speaker 3: learned the power of laughter. I learned the power of
19:49
Speaker 3: humor and what it does to a person when you
19:52
Speaker 3: make somebody else smile and make somebody else laugh. So
19:56
Speaker 3: my background has a lot to do with helping people
20:00
Speaker 3: laugh and smile, and so thankfully that has come into
20:03
Speaker 3: my speaking world and my career, and that has actually
20:07
Speaker 3: helped me a great deal on being very busy as
20:11
Speaker 3: the speakers.
20:12
Speaker 7: Yes, you just never know, right, You never know.
20:17
Speaker 3: And you know what, it's interesting. One morning I was
20:20
Speaker 3: watching Good Morning in America and Jay Leno was on,
20:22
Speaker 3: and it was one of those feel good shows where
20:25
Speaker 3: he was giving away one of his mini cars to
20:27
Speaker 3: a veteran. You know, you had the tears in your eyes.
20:30
Speaker 3: But he said something that caught my attention, and he
20:33
Speaker 3: said this. He said, if I have not gone through
20:35
Speaker 3: a day without making somebody smile or laugh, I have
20:39
Speaker 3: not done my job. And I thought what a great
20:44
Speaker 3: philosophy to adapt into your own life. I mean to
20:48
Speaker 3: be intentional about every day helping somebody else smile or laugh.
20:53
Speaker 3: And I tell you, if you have that philosophy, it
20:57
Speaker 3: will it will change your attitude about life. If you
21:00
Speaker 3: will change your attitude in a day, if that is
21:02
Speaker 3: your goal to help other people's.
21:04
Speaker 4: Ye, yes, I love that. Well, thank you, thank you
21:08
Speaker 4: for sharing that. And you talked earlier about sharing the
21:11
Speaker 4: stage with Nick Voye Chase, and could you say a
21:14
Speaker 4: little bit more about that? And you know, I know
21:17
Speaker 4: that your big team again is to never get up
21:19
Speaker 4: on your dream. So if you could tell us about
21:22
Speaker 4: Nick and maybe give us a few more examples of
21:24
Speaker 4: that as well.
21:25
Speaker 3: Sure. Well you know so I just told you that
21:29
Speaker 3: I told you that my husband couldn't stand clowns, and
21:31
Speaker 3: here I'm going to become a professional clowns. Well he
21:33
Speaker 3: did eventually like one, and that was me. But you
21:38
Speaker 3: know I I'll never forget the night that I told him.
21:42
Speaker 3: You know what, I want to join the John Maxwell team.
21:45
Speaker 3: I'm going to become a motivational speaker. And he looked
21:48
Speaker 3: at me and he said, oh my goodness, I can't
21:51
Speaker 3: stand motivational speakers, and I just was thrown for a
21:57
Speaker 3: loop and I thought, oh my goodness. But you know what,
22:00
Speaker 3: I one to respect. I thought, huh, you didn't like clowns,
22:03
Speaker 3: but you did end up liking me. I'm going to
22:05
Speaker 3: have to prove myself to you. And then when I
22:10
Speaker 3: started leaning out of that profession and in town was
22:13
Speaker 3: talking to different business people about becoming a motivational It
22:17
Speaker 3: was interesting that I actually had business people that said,
22:21
Speaker 3: you will never make it in this town as a
22:24
Speaker 3: motivational speaker. And I was like, oh my, I mean really,
22:28
Speaker 3: it was kind of heartbreaking. And they said, because you're
22:32
Speaker 3: known as this professional clown in town. And so that
22:37
Speaker 3: was kind of in the back of my head for
22:39
Speaker 3: a long time. Thankfully, now I'm also well known as
22:43
Speaker 3: a speaker and been hired many many times in this town.
22:46
Speaker 3: But it was in the back of my mind. Well,
22:49
Speaker 3: when I became a John Exell team members. You know,
22:51
Speaker 3: when you go to Orlando and you go through the
22:53
Speaker 3: three day certification. That first day you see ten different
23:01
Speaker 3: John Maxwell team members go up on the stage and
23:03
Speaker 3: they get to do their three minute speech and it's like,
23:06
Speaker 3: you know, it's like pretty it's a wow thing. And
23:09
Speaker 3: I remember thinking, well, when I come back in six months,
23:14
Speaker 3: when they do this again, I want to get up there.
23:16
Speaker 3: I want to get on the stage. So that was
23:20
Speaker 3: my dream. Well, I didn't realize that it was going
23:24
Speaker 3: to be a grougling process to go through the interview
23:27
Speaker 3: process with We both know Roddy Gaalbrath and you have
23:32
Speaker 3: to submit your videos and he wants the highest quality
23:37
Speaker 3: in speeches. If you, I mean, if you want to
23:40
Speaker 3: share the stage of John Maxwell, it's got to be good.
23:42
Speaker 3: And I remember speech after speech after speech that I
23:46
Speaker 3: suaid it and he would just say, you know what,
23:48
Speaker 3: you need to go back and do this again, and
23:50
Speaker 3: I was like, ah ah. But finally I remember the
23:55
Speaker 3: day when he said, you know, I think this is
23:57
Speaker 3: going to be great. And so I made it through
24:00
Speaker 3: stage the stage one of around when is probably what
24:04
Speaker 3: I should say. And then so if you make it
24:07
Speaker 3: through round one, when you get to Orlando, you audition
24:10
Speaker 3: in front of other people. And I remember walking into
24:14
Speaker 3: that room and my plane was late, so I actually
24:17
Speaker 3: got in on the last ten minutes of being able
24:20
Speaker 3: to get into that room, and I rushed in the
24:23
Speaker 3: room and I sat down and he walked over to me,
24:26
Speaker 3: I mean within seconds, and he handed me that microphone
24:29
Speaker 3: and I was like, oh, oh, it's my turn. And
24:33
Speaker 3: I went up there and I froze, literally froze, and
24:41
Speaker 3: he was kind enough to, you know, asked me if
24:44
Speaker 3: I wanted to start over or no. I asked him
24:46
Speaker 3: if I could start over, and he said yes, and
24:49
Speaker 3: I froze again. I mean I just stared at everybody
24:51
Speaker 3: like a deer in headlights, and you know, everybody was
24:55
Speaker 3: so gracious, Hey, we love you, you can do this,
24:58
Speaker 3: and you know, I look back and I the third
25:00
Speaker 3: time round. I don't know what I said, but I
25:03
Speaker 3: remember going back to my seat wanting to hide underneath
25:05
Speaker 3: the take. Of course didn't pass, didn't make it to
25:09
Speaker 3: this big old stage time. But I thought, you know,
25:13
Speaker 3: six months later, when I come back, I'll do it again.
25:15
Speaker 3: And went through the whole grueling process of submitting video
25:20
Speaker 3: after video after video, and then you know, I made
25:24
Speaker 3: it through the process. And so when I got there again,
25:28
Speaker 3: you know, I felt more confident. But when I get
25:30
Speaker 3: up on the stage about halfway through, I noticed that
25:33
Speaker 3: my legs were shaking so bad that it tripped me up,
25:40
Speaker 3: and I just stared out at everybody again because I
25:45
Speaker 3: totally couldn't remember what I had just said. I mean,
25:47
Speaker 3: it freaked me out, and I remember walking out and
25:53
Speaker 3: thinking this is not for me. I'll never do this again,
25:57
Speaker 3: I'll never come back again. And I I mean, I
26:00
Speaker 3: went up called my family and I was just devastated.
26:03
Speaker 3: And I have I mean, as an entertainer, I've been
26:06
Speaker 3: in front of thousands of people, been on stages, and
26:09
Speaker 3: for me to not be able to say a three
26:12
Speaker 3: minute speech was so tough. And so a couple months later,
26:19
Speaker 3: I am actually speaking out of college to new college students,
26:23
Speaker 3: and I'm speaking to them ironically about their dreams and
26:29
Speaker 3: their life and how they should never give up on
26:31
Speaker 3: their dreams. And literally, while I am speaking to them,
26:35
Speaker 3: I'm having this conversation in my brain and I'm saying
26:39
Speaker 3: to myself, how can you talk to these kids about
26:43
Speaker 3: never giving up on a dream when you gave up
26:46
Speaker 3: on your own dream, You're a hypocrite. And I mean,
26:52
Speaker 3: I'm talking to these kids and thinking all these things,
26:55
Speaker 3: and while I'm talking to them, I ended up talking
26:58
Speaker 3: to myself and saying, you're not going to give up
27:01
Speaker 3: on your dream. You're gonna You're gonna get back up
27:03
Speaker 3: on that stage, and I remember when I went through
27:09
Speaker 3: the process again, submitting video after video video, and finally,
27:13
Speaker 3: you know, one was accepted. I remember putting my head
27:17
Speaker 3: on my desk and literally making the decision are you
27:22
Speaker 3: going to go for it or not? And I decided
27:26
Speaker 3: I was gonna. I mean, HI was so determined. I
27:30
Speaker 3: was like, I was like Rocky Nothing, nothing was going
27:34
Speaker 3: to stop me. And when I got on the plane
27:39
Speaker 3: to fly to Orlando, it was an hour and a
27:42
Speaker 3: half flight, and I shut my eyes and I said
27:45
Speaker 3: that three minute speech every three minutes until I got
27:50
Speaker 3: to Orlando. And then when I got to the hotel
27:54
Speaker 3: and I got settled, I went into the halls of
27:58
Speaker 3: the Marriotte down in the conference center, and I looked
28:01
Speaker 3: for people and I asked them, can I do my
28:04
Speaker 3: speech for you? And you know what, I didn't want to.
28:06
Speaker 3: In fact, I had stayed with my sister and I
28:10
Speaker 3: did it for her and she says to me, well,
28:13
Speaker 3: when you do it, you might have a little bit
28:15
Speaker 3: more enthusiasm. I thought, this is not a good start.
28:22
Speaker 3: And so I found some people and I did it,
28:27
Speaker 3: and I messed up just a little bit, but I
28:28
Speaker 3: thought I did it, and so I ended up probably
28:32
Speaker 3: went around about ten different people and I say, can
28:35
Speaker 3: I do my speech for you? I mean, I was
28:36
Speaker 3: so determined. And then on the day, you know what
28:40
Speaker 3: it's like on that day, you don't know if your
28:43
Speaker 3: name's going to be called or not. And they called
28:46
Speaker 3: they called ten people up. So I sat there and
28:49
Speaker 3: I wrote out my speech all day long. And you know,
28:54
Speaker 3: when Rodny got up there and announced the person, guess what,
28:57
Speaker 3: my name wasn't called and I was and I just
29:02
Speaker 3: my heart sunk. But you know what, a couple minutes later,
29:07
Speaker 3: he said, you know what, I have somebody else that
29:09
Speaker 3: I want to come up on the stage and he
29:11
Speaker 3: announced my name and I was in the very back
29:16
Speaker 3: and I just was like, I mean, I just was
29:19
Speaker 3: like wow. And all the way up to the stage,
29:22
Speaker 3: I was saying my speech. So you know, it's thank
29:30
Speaker 3: goodness it's recorded, because I mean, anybody can go to
29:33
Speaker 3: my YouTube channel and they can watch me do the
29:36
Speaker 3: speech that I did, because my speech was about messing
29:39
Speaker 3: up the first two times and so so you know,
29:44
Speaker 3: that was that was a huge dream for me. And
29:49
Speaker 3: because I didn't give up, give up. You have no
29:52
Speaker 3: idea the amount of confidence that was built on the
29:54
Speaker 3: inside of me for doing that and speaking in front
29:58
Speaker 3: of three thousand people. So yeah, it was it was.
30:02
Speaker 3: It was huge to be able to do that, and
30:04
Speaker 3: so it prepared me for six months later when I
30:09
Speaker 3: was going to be speaking before Nick Voygic in an
30:13
Speaker 3: arena to fifteen thousand kids. And so I truly believe
30:18
Speaker 3: what you're doing today is always preparing you for what
30:21
Speaker 3: you're going to do tomorrow. And absolutely don't give up
30:25
Speaker 3: on your dreams, no matter how small or how big
30:28
Speaker 3: they are. I love that.
30:30
Speaker 4: I was just writing as you were talking, like not once,
30:34
Speaker 4: not twice, but three times.
30:36
Speaker 2: Yeah, self talk and just.
30:39
Speaker 4: Getting up there and having the courage present yourself.
30:43
Speaker 1: Again and again and again.
30:44
Speaker 4: And I do know what that process is like. So
30:47
Speaker 4: I'm reading it with you. Congratulations. I love the image
30:51
Speaker 4: of rocking because at the end, I'm just imagining your
30:54
Speaker 4: hand just umping that you know, big b that he
30:57
Speaker 4: does right.
30:58
Speaker 3: Well, Well, what's funny is after the speech I did
31:01
Speaker 3: jump up and down so and then Roddy says finally, so, yeah,
31:09
Speaker 3: you'll have to go on YouTube and watch watch my
31:11
Speaker 3: John Maxwell stage speech.
31:14
Speaker 7: Congratulations.
31:15
Speaker 4: I noticed that that story is such a powerful story.
31:19
Speaker 4: Because so many times we have a dream and a
31:23
Speaker 4: lot of us don't get started, right, but those who do.
31:26
Speaker 2: It's not like an overnight, instant thing.
31:29
Speaker 6: You have to really really work hard and stay in
31:33
Speaker 6: there and you know, stay committed.
31:35
Speaker 4: So congratulations, Deasy, well.
31:37
Speaker 3: Thank you. And you know, from the first time that
31:40
Speaker 3: I went until I finally did it, I think it
31:43
Speaker 3: was a total of four years.
31:45
Speaker 1: Oh my wow.
31:47
Speaker 4: Yeah, But as you said, you know, that was equipping
31:50
Speaker 4: you unbeknownst to you at the time, but that was
31:53
Speaker 4: eclipping you for an even bigger audience and bigger platform.
31:57
Speaker 4: And you know, how cool is it to talk to
31:59
Speaker 4: fifteen thousand kids with nick voyage, right right, yeah, right, yeah,
32:06
Speaker 4: that's that's that's just astounding. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
32:10
Speaker 4: So tell me, I know that you have done so
32:13
Speaker 4: many very.
32:14
Speaker 7: Cool things in your.
32:15
Speaker 3: In your career as.
32:16
Speaker 4: An entertainer, as a seeker, as a clown.
32:21
Speaker 7: And how has this.
32:22
Speaker 4: Pandemic shaped or influenced or impacted your career.
32:29
Speaker 3: Well, it's some impact, actually impacted it in a huge way.
32:33
Speaker 3: Because my last speaking event was March sixth, and in
32:40
Speaker 3: March and April through the summer, I had a record
32:44
Speaker 3: number of speaking events. I mean, I was blown away
32:47
Speaker 3: by how many I was booked, and it was like overnight,
32:51
Speaker 3: I mean it seemed like overnight they were all canceled
32:56
Speaker 3: and I started getting the calls, getting the emails to
32:59
Speaker 3: the point where or literally everything was canceled and until
33:05
Speaker 3: I think this week will be my first speaking event
33:08
Speaker 3: that I will be live, which I'm just so excited.
33:10
Speaker 3: They have no idea the amount of energy that I'm
33:12
Speaker 3: gonna be bringing to them, but but yeah, it and
33:18
Speaker 3: so you know, it gave me a huge perspective because
33:23
Speaker 3: of the way I'm paid through my corporation, I was
33:25
Speaker 3: not able to get even unemployment, and so it gave
33:28
Speaker 3: me a different perspective on what happens when you have
33:32
Speaker 3: no money coming in. And my husband and I also
33:36
Speaker 3: own a business in the in one in our local mall,
33:39
Speaker 3: and for two months the mall was closed, but we
33:42
Speaker 3: still had to pay a huge rent, internet insurance and
33:45
Speaker 3: all that, and and there was a couple of times
33:48
Speaker 3: I literally got in my car to take it to
33:51
Speaker 3: the car dealership and say, I have to give my
33:53
Speaker 3: car back. And so it was so I have I
33:58
Speaker 3: have a new perspective of on being on the side
34:03
Speaker 3: of having really serious financial needs and how you're going
34:10
Speaker 3: to adapt and deal with that. And so with a
34:14
Speaker 3: couple of the things that I did. Because I hate
34:16
Speaker 3: to waste time, and especially since I wasn't working, I
34:19
Speaker 3: spent a lot of time. My YouTube channel was stress Busters,
34:23
Speaker 3: so I did a lot of those. And then I
34:25
Speaker 3: wrote my second book, which is ironically about stress. So
34:30
Speaker 3: it's called give Me some Chocolate, I'm Stressed, and it's
34:36
Speaker 3: from a faith perspective, so it's faith filled strategies on
34:40
Speaker 3: how to refuel, recharge, and redo stress. So it'll be
34:42
Speaker 3: published in January. But I also had an opportunity because
34:48
Speaker 3: I needed to work my mother lesser heart, I had
34:52
Speaker 3: the opportunity to help her fulfill one of her dreams.
34:55
Speaker 3: And that's seventy nine years old. My mother decides to
34:58
Speaker 3: open a restaurant COVID. So I just decided I was
35:04
Speaker 3: going to go all in and help her and get
35:06
Speaker 3: this going. And it's it's opened and it's going well.
35:11
Speaker 3: And and now with speaking of events that are going
35:15
Speaker 3: to be starting actually this week, you know, I'll be
35:18
Speaker 3: winning myself out of that. But I've been able to
35:20
Speaker 3: spend time with my mom and be a blessing to her. So, yeah,
35:24
Speaker 3: it's been it's been a very interesting year for all
35:27
Speaker 3: of us.
35:28
Speaker 4: Yes, ma'am, indeed, and it sounds like you are learning
35:32
Speaker 4: a lot. And I'm just praying for you that you
35:36
Speaker 4: will have those seeking engagements that were canceled earlier. Just
35:40
Speaker 4: you know that your cavendar discontinues to fill for the
35:44
Speaker 4: rest of this year and beyond.
35:45
Speaker 3: Desi, thank you, and so.
35:49
Speaker 7: I just want to thank you again for joining us today. Desi,
35:53
Speaker 7: you are positively amazing. I love just the breath of
35:57
Speaker 7: your background, love your passion. I'd love that you're a
36:01
Speaker 7: woman of faith.
36:02
Speaker 4: And just thank you so.
36:04
Speaker 2: Much for never never giving up.
36:06
Speaker 3: On your dreams. Thank you so much, Gloria.
36:09
Speaker 7: All right, thank you, thank you.
36:13
Speaker 1: So inspiring. Clearly, Desie is an amazing leader. She makes
36:20
Speaker 1: a difference in her own life and in the lives
36:22
Speaker 1: of so many others in her family, her community, and
36:26
Speaker 1: throughout the world in her work as the stress Less Coach.
36:32
Speaker 1: To learn more about Desi's work, you can go to
36:35
Speaker 1: her website and that's www. Dot Desie Paine and that's
36:41
Speaker 1: d s I. P A y n E. Www Dot
36:48
Speaker 1: Dezi Payne dot com. Okay, again, I'm gonna spell it
36:53
Speaker 1: for you because I know we have listeners all over
36:55
Speaker 1: the world and I want you to be sure to
36:57
Speaker 1: get this. It's www dot Desi Paine d E s
37:03
Speaker 1: I p A y n e dot com. You can
37:08
Speaker 1: also check out Desi's books and I love these titles.
37:11
Speaker 1: Do you Work for the Living Dead?
37:14
Speaker 2: Right?
37:15
Speaker 1: And another title is give me some Chocolate I'm stressed.
37:23
Speaker 2: Now. Be sure to connect with Desi directly as well.
37:26
Speaker 1: You can do that by going to her YouTube channel,
37:29
Speaker 1: which is called stress Busters.
37:33
Speaker 2: Very very cool.
37:35
Speaker 1: Okay, if you're just joining us, I'm doctor Gloria and
37:40
Speaker 1: this is Legacy Living. Make your Life Count. We just
37:45
Speaker 1: heard from my very special guest, Desie Pain, motivational humor speaker, trainer, leader, author,
37:53
Speaker 1: and fabulous John Maxwell team member. If you want to
38:01
Speaker 1: make your life count, if you want to be the
38:04
Speaker 1: change you seek, be sure to listen to this show
38:08
Speaker 1: again and again. And hey, be sure to tell somebody right,
38:13
Speaker 1: tell your friends, your family, your coworkers.
38:17
Speaker 2: All right.
38:18
Speaker 1: You can find me right here on iTunes, Audible, Alexa, SoundCloud, iHeart,
38:25
Speaker 1: tune In, spreaker, dot Com, Talk Network Radio, and SEW
38:31
Speaker 1: many other places. Be sure to tune in again next time. Now,
38:37
Speaker 1: before I close, I just want to give a shout
38:39
Speaker 1: out to all the women, men and our young people
38:43
Speaker 1: all around the world, because you know what, we are
38:47
Speaker 1: the ones. We are the ones we have been waiting for.
38:52
Speaker 1: What do I mean by that, Here's what I mean.
38:55
Speaker 1: Don't wait, Do not wait for somebody else to stay
39:00
Speaker 1: step up to make things happen in your life, because
39:03
Speaker 1: you know what, they might not step up. In fact,
39:07
Speaker 1: they might not even know you're waiting for them right
39:10
Speaker 1: to do something. But you can be the one. Can
39:13
Speaker 1: I just tell you something. You are the one. You
39:17
Speaker 1: are that person in charge of you. You are the
39:20
Speaker 1: one who can make a difference in your own life
39:23
Speaker 1: so that you can model and make a difference in
39:27
Speaker 1: the lives of people in your life. Your sister, your brother,
39:30
Speaker 1: your mom, your dad, your auntie, your uncle, your.
39:34
Speaker 2: Teacher, your boss. You are the one. You know something.
39:40
Speaker 1: It is truly amazing how much impact we have as
39:45
Speaker 1: leaders in the workplace, in our communities, and in our
39:49
Speaker 1: own family. Especially in our family. That's where it all begins, right,
39:56
Speaker 1: leading begins exactly where you are, you your spouse, with your
40:02
Speaker 1: own children, right in your own kitchen, around the dinner table,
40:06
Speaker 1: helping out with homework, when you go to church, or
40:09
Speaker 1: when you go out shopping. So, moms and dads, even
40:13
Speaker 1: when you think that your son or your daughter isn't
40:17
Speaker 1: paying any attention at all, let me tell you something.
40:21
Speaker 2: They are.
40:22
Speaker 1: They are listening, they're soaking it in, and more than
40:26
Speaker 1: anything else, they are watching you. Because, you know what,
40:33
Speaker 1: more than anything else we can do, we can demonstrate
40:38
Speaker 1: our leadership right, and leadership is caught, not taught. That's right,
40:44
Speaker 1: leadership is caught, not taught. Now, let me be really clear.
40:49
Speaker 1: Your children are scoping you out.
40:53
Speaker 2: They observe everything.
40:55
Speaker 1: You are, and everything you say and everything you do.
41:01
Speaker 1: Most importantly, know that they are watching you to see
41:06
Speaker 1: if what you say and what you do match up. Now,
41:10
Speaker 1: our actions really do speak much much louder than our words.
41:15
Speaker 1: A good friend of mine who's a former CEO, always says,
41:20
Speaker 1: as a parent or as a leader, in any context,
41:24
Speaker 1: your walk has got to talk louder than your talk talks.
41:29
Speaker 1: Let me repeat that. She says, your walk has got
41:34
Speaker 1: to talk louder than your talk talks. Why is that
41:40
Speaker 1: because that's how we build the bridge called trust, That's
41:45
Speaker 1: how we strengthen our bond with those we love. That's
41:49
Speaker 1: how we deepen our relationships, one step at a time,
41:54
Speaker 1: inch by inch, mile by mile, and smile by smile
41:59
Speaker 1: at home, at work, and in any area of our life,
42:03
Speaker 1: every single day. Three sixty five, twenty four to seven.
42:09
Speaker 1: So how is your walk lining up with your talk?
42:14
Speaker 2: You know what?
42:15
Speaker 1: It is never too late to get your walk and
42:19
Speaker 1: your talk synced up, to get your act together, so
42:22
Speaker 1: to speak, right, so you can take it on the road.
42:25
Speaker 1: So don't beat yourself up if you kind of had
42:27
Speaker 1: a misstep here and there right with your walk and
42:29
Speaker 1: your talk. Okay, it's never too late to get it
42:34
Speaker 1: together and put it on the road so that you
42:37
Speaker 1: can make the difference in someone else's life that only
42:41
Speaker 1: you can make. Remember this, how you live is how
42:47
Speaker 1: you lead. Now, if you happen to miss any part
42:53
Speaker 1: of this week's episode or last week's, you can simply
42:57
Speaker 1: download the recording and listen to it at your convenience.
43:01
Speaker 1: You can even listen to it on the go again.
43:04
Speaker 1: Check us out on iTunes, Audible, Alexa, SoundCloud, iHeart, tune in, Spreak,
43:12
Speaker 1: your dot com, talk network, radio, and so many other
43:17
Speaker 1: places you can also listen right here at www dot
43:23
Speaker 1: Talknetwork Radio dot com Forward slash Hosts Forward Slash Legacy Living.
43:32
Speaker 1: That's Talknetwork Radio dot com. Forward slash Hosts Forward slash
43:38
Speaker 1: Legacy Living. Now you can find me and learn more
43:42
Speaker 1: about my work and Legacy Living. Make your life count
43:46
Speaker 1: by visiting the Gloria Burgess website. And as I've mentioned before,
43:52
Speaker 1: if you love to be inspired, you can actually subscribe
43:55
Speaker 1: to my inspirations right on my website. Just scroll down
43:59
Speaker 1: a little bit look on the right sidebar until you
44:02
Speaker 1: see the place to add your email address to subscribe
44:07
Speaker 1: to my weekly inspirations.
44:09
Speaker 2: It's that simple.
44:10
Speaker 1: Each week you get a lovely photograph and a short
44:13
Speaker 1: quotation that inspires you. Or visit me on LinkedIn or
44:19
Speaker 1: on Facebook. At Facebook, you can find me at Facebook
44:22
Speaker 1: dot com Forward slash dr for doctor Gloria Burgess, pH d.
44:30
Speaker 1: That's Facebook dot com Forward slash Dr Gloria Burgess, PhD.
44:38
Speaker 1: You can also find me on the TEDx site and
44:41
Speaker 1: listen to one of my ted talks. Just type in
44:43
Speaker 1: my name to find me there.
44:47
Speaker 2: All right.
44:50
Speaker 1: Now, once again, before I close, I just want to
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Speaker 1: thank each of you for tuning in for allowing me
44:57
Speaker 1: to share a bit about my journey with what leg
45:00
Speaker 1: Yes living is all about not just living and learning,
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Speaker 1: but living and learning and serving so that you make
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Speaker 1: a difference in your own life and in the lives
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Speaker 1: of people wherever you go. It's about being on purpose
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Speaker 1: every single day. Three sixty five twenty four seven. Legacy
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Speaker 1: Living is a powerful way to make your life count.
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Speaker 1: Once again, thank you for joining me today. I'm your host,
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Speaker 1: doctor Gloria Gloria Burgess, and this is Legacy Living. Make
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Speaker 1: your life count. Join me again next time right here
45:47
Speaker 1: for another episode of Legacy Living. Make your life count.
45:53
Speaker 1: Don't just count the days in your life, Make the
45:59
Speaker 1: day in your life count. That's what legacy living is
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Speaker 1: all about. Have a fantastic day and remember make the
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Speaker 1: days in your life count. God bless you.
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Speaker 2: That's our show today.
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Speaker 8: I'm your host, doctor Gloria Gloria Burgess.
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Speaker 2: I hope you'll join me again next time.
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Speaker 8: Until then, don't just count the days in your life.
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Speaker 8: Make the days in your life count. That's what legacy
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Speaker 8: living is all about. Here's to you have a fantastic
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Speaker 8: day and be sure to make it a yes kind
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Speaker 8: of day. Remember to celebrate the music of your life.
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Speaker 2: Make the days in your life count