Latest / The Kelly Jedele Show / Reclaim Your Vision: The Tutu Framework
Transcript
- Kelly Jedele: Each one of us has been given a vision for our lives and we have pieces inside of us that we can continue to really research and look into if we give ourselves the time and the space. Kelly intro: Hey, I'm Kelly Yataly, and this is the Kelly Yataly Show. Here's the lie we've been sold that you have to pick: the career or the kid, the big vision or the bedtime story. I'm calling it. That's not the deal. You can have both. I have built businesses for the last 16 years as a single mom. And you can do it without hustling yourself into the ground, but by choosing strategically every single day. This show is for the woman who wants the business, the brand, the freedom, and the family. All of it. So grab your coffee, your kids' juice box, whatever you got in your hand. Let's get into it. Kelly Jedele: Hello and welcome back to the Kelly Yadily show. Today we're talking about reclaiming your vision and how we talk about that within the coaching that I do. So today I'm going to go over a framework that I've come up with and I really want to explain how it has impacted my life and how I want it to impact and hopefully impact your life as we go forward. I truly feel that Each one of us has been given a vision for our lives and we have pieces inside of us that we can continue to really research and look into if we give ourselves the time and the space. And I know a lot of things come up through life, right? A lot of things happen that aren't on our plan for our life. Like when you're seven years old and you're thinking of all the freedoms and all the wonderful things you're gonna have as a grownup, and then life happens, right? You either get to college or you don't, or you get married or you don't, or you have a child or you don't, or you move across the country, you it's just there's so many things that really, choices that we make in our early years, for me it was my 20s. that really form how our life will progress. And the plan that we had can really get sidetracked so easily with other people's plans and other things that happen in our lives. So I wanna share with you today just some of my personal story and then some of the things that we can unpack together and work through to hopefully get you to a place where you are living out loud and living your full life. And there is nothing that brings me more joy than to sit alongside of you and watch that unraveling happen where you can feel the vision come back into alignment and really be there for yourself. It's just a magical feeling for me. So for me, my 20s was a host of really fast, huge, big life decisions. And when I was a little girl, I saw myself as being this really huge, like speaker on stages, motivational speaking, going out and teaching people all over the world, right? And then I graduated college and immediately felt like, my gosh, what's next? Like, how do I go from being a poor college student to a speaker on stages, right? That was just like, that's a really tough transition. I was in Mary Kay at the time and I saw the million dollar directors and all of the national sales directors speaking just like I would want to. And so that was part of my walk as I was in Mary Kay for 10 years and I really enjoyed listening and being at the feet of those women. And a lot of the motivational speakers that they hired on for the conferences like Zig Ziglar, Wayne Dyer, just a lot of those big name peoples would come. and speak to us as the consultants. And that really spoke to my heart and my soul. So then of course, after college, got married and had my daughter right away. And when you have kids, it becomes a really big challenge to overcome what they need and what you need to be their parent in order to like really conflict with your vision for your life. Like there's a lot of things in the intersection of that happening, right? So that was a complication for me. And I got, I was only married for three years. And so that marriage didn't work. it, it's wasn't, you know, that's not always, that's not, divorce is never the vision that we have for our lives. It's not something that we designed or want or really. even hope for, right? Like it's not even an idea. So it really derails you for us a half a second. And I got my feet back under me. I was young and I had a lot going on. And I got married again. And when I was 27, or maybe 28. maybe even 29, in there, in that range. And that marriage only lasted six months. So I got derailed again. That one, wasn't a healthy marriage. so luckily I was able to get out fast. And my daughter and I, you know, made a life for ourselves. But it was then, just a few years later that I started my company and my Let Kelly, my cleaning company. And really creating and starting that. business helped me work towards my vision, but it wasn't my actual vision. So it wasn't until many years later, 17 years later, that now I'm really focused on getting my vision back in place. But in the meantime, I went through another relationship and a huge breakup. And then we had COVID and my parents died, both my mom and my dad. And that pulls the rug out from underneath you. So I'm saying all that to say, that life happens, right? And my vision got so buried underneath so many things that I wasn't really able to see my life and the existential crisis that I had. And do I have a legacy to leave my daughter and families? And do I have anything to offer? What is my purpose in this life? I got really lost in that. And I could see how that's really possible for so many of us when we're going through so many things and. I see women that are married for 25, 30 years that get lost in their husband's vision or women that live with their parents and get lost in their vision or have multiple children or wanted children and don't, and that didn't work out or had a career and that, that didn't work out. So our vision is still in there. It's still inside of you. So the first step in this for the vision framework. And you may have seen, this comes from the video of mine that just went, I say viral, but semi-viral, I don't know, 50,000 views. I don't know how viral that is, but it's a lot to me. And so it was me wearing my daughter's tutu and saying that, you know, I want to get all the money's worth out of these costumes because they just sit in the closet, right? So that inspired this framework, the tutu framework. Take things that are in the closet and take a look at them and bring them out. So the first tutu, the first tea that we have is take it out of the closet. Bring your vision back in front of you. Name the one thing that you said that you would do later or when the kids leave or when you retire or whenever, when you lose the weight, when you ask the friend, whatever. when you win the lottery. Name that thing that you shelved, that you put on the shelf, you put in the closet for later. Take that thing out and look at it. Do you journal about it? Do you still think about it? Is it still inside of you? That's something to really, really dig at. Because a lot of times, like mine, being a professional speaker, that is a huge dream. And... It is something that I have, I have done a lot of speaking. So it's not that, but doing it at a scale that I want is a totally different story than what I've been doing. So it's not that I don't want, know, it's not that I haven't done it. So I have, I've done a lot of speaking. It's just the level that I want is different, right? It's a whole nother thing. And so I thought maybe that had passed like that, that wasn't going to be my life and that wasn't it. Right. And it's here. So the next step in the Tutu framework. is the you. You have to uncover the excuse. Uncover it. Why did you put it away? Why? it's usually, spoiler alert, usually it's not about time and it's rarely about money. It's usually about a confidence inside of us or something that gets in our way that we need to really work on uncovering. What are those excuses that we give ourselves? I hear women that don't wanna do content and put themselves out there because they're not happy with their face, the shape of their face or their body. Or they're worried about wrinkles or they're worried about how they sound or they're worried about if they're worthy or they deserve it. Like all of these things that we have for our vision, we've got to take that excuse and really look at it. Is that a real excuse? Is that something that really, really is holding us back from this? Or did we just make it up to make ourselves feel comfortable? The third point, you gotta try it on. You gotta take that tutu out of the closet. You gotta try it on. One small, tiny little step, not a plan, but an action. Take one little step towards your vision. And I tell you what, one little tiny step will feel uncomfortable at first. It may even feel chaotic. It did to me. I was just not very long ago. A few months ago, stepping into this content creation thing for me and every single post was cringy. Every single one. But I did it anyway. So I don't know what that step is for you. Maybe you've always, I don't know, wanted to be, I have no idea what you want. But I want you to name it and I want you to take a little step. Maybe you wanna learn a new language. You've always wanted to speak French and go to the Eiffel Tower and, know, I don't know. go on the Louvre, whatever, all the things, right? So maybe today you're not speaking French or buying your ticket to Paris, but maybe what you're doing is you're looking up and seeing if maybe that Duolingo app that you've been eyeing for two years is free or if you can afford the cost of the plan. Maybe something like that, or asking your friend or talking about it or just voicing it to someone you feel safe. Just a baby step and make sure. that you tell yourself you're just trying it. There's no consequences. There's no, if you do this, you're down the road and you're already married and you've got two kids. No, none of that. It's just, you're trying it on, you let yourself have it. Let yourself have just a little taste of what it might be. Because you never know where it's going. You just never know. And then the last one is use your voice. Say it out loud and put a date on Use your voice, the voice that says exactly what you want inside of you. Take that all the way to what you want. For me, many times I've been in, oh, accountability groups, vision board meetings, different occasions throughout my life where I've talked about wanting to be, you know, a professional speaker and It wasn't too long ago that I was sitting at a table of women and we were talking about our goals for the year and things that we wanted to do. And I said out loud that I wanted, I'm pursuing being a professional speaker this year. And one of the women said to me, she said, if that has been always your dream and it's not going away, it's something that you should do. And I needed to hear that. So if it's still there and it started at seven. or 20 or 30 or even 40. If it's still there, give it a try. The smallest bit. We've got YouTube for a reason. Go check it out on YouTube. Find someone who's already doing it and check it out and see if it might be worth it. It might be something that you enjoy. I encourage you. And the reason why I encourage you is because these last few months where I have been stepping into my vision for myself, I have felt the most alive that I have felt in 10 years. I really, really got to the point where I didn't know if any of this mattered, this life. And I was like, you know, it's fine if it's over. If something happens, it's fine. And now with this vision and me working towards my goals and being scared along the way, but. working towards my goals. I am so pumped up. I have had many people, probably close to 10, which is many, but people that know me, like people in my life that know me have seen me doing things and they said, what's going on with you? You look so alive. And it's because I'm doing this. I'm actually stepping into the vision that I have for myself and doing the thing. So I ask you, what are you waiting for? What do you need? And this is part of my coaching. This is exactly what I do. Because I've been through this place in my life so many times and I have pulled myself out. And it's been coaches that have walked beside me and friends that have pulled me out, accountability groups that have happened. So I'm putting this in place so that we can do this together. We can do it through group coaching, which starts next Tuesday, August 4th, or you can join any time, any Tuesday. or you can do one-to-one coaching with me. So if it's building your business up or scaling your business in something that's more business related, we can definitely do that too. Allow me to be the one that helps you. Lean on me to guide you. I would be honored. And I know you got it in you because this little one right here did it. And I'm nobody special. I just put in the reps. I just did the thing. Okay, I have a big personality. I'll claim it. And I see it possible for you too. And if you sit with me, I will show you that person of you, that version of you. So thank you so much for being here with me today. The Tutu Framework. Make sure that you're doing the things. Take it out of the closet. Uncover the excuse. Try it on today. Try on that vision. And then use your voice. to make it happen. Put it on the calendar. Make a date to get those tiny steps moving you forward. Thank you for your time. Have a great week. We'll see you next week. Bye. Kelly: That's it for this week. If something in this episode hit, do me a favor. Send it to one woman in your life who needs to hear it. That's how this community grows, one honest conversation at a time. Follow the show, leave a review, and come find me on Instagram. I read everything. Remember, strong doesn't mean solo. I'll see you next week.