Latest / All About The Joy / Unpacking Loss, Isolation at the Grocery Store, the Role of Jealousy and A Visit from Charlie Mattera

Transcript

Unpacking Loss, Isolation at the Grocery Store, the Role of Jealousy and A Visit from Charlie Mattera · All About The Joy

0:00
Carmen Lezeth: Hey everybody, hi everybody, welcome to All About the Joy.
0:03
Carmen Lezeth: So glad you're here.
0:04
Carmen Lezeth: So you know, this week was a really interesting week for me because Monday was the anniversary of my mother's passing and I tend to make that a celebration of her life kind of day, just for myself.
0:16
Carmen Lezeth: You know what I mean.
0:17
Carmen Lezeth: And I think on Monday you had texted me or something and said how you doing or whatever.
0:21
Carmen Lezeth: You know, because we talked pretty much during the week and so it was going fine.
0:27
Carmen Lezeth: I thought I was totally, absolutely fine.
0:29
Carmen Lezeth: And then on the 29th I have another anniversary, which is Alden's brother, steve.
0:34
Carmen Lezeth: He passed away like three years ago of brain cancer.
0:37
Carmen Lezeth: You know what I mean.
0:38
Carmen Lezeth: So it's just still fine, totally fine.
0:41
Carmen Lezeth: But on Thursday morning not Thursday Tuesday morning at nine o'clock I got an email and the email was telling me that one of their friend's mother had passed away and you know whatever, their wife was traveling to go to this situation or whatever.
0:59
Carmen Lezeth: And clearly it was oh and it was unexpected, that's what it was.
1:02
Carmen Lezeth: So I got the email and I totally lost it.
1:07
Carmen Lezeth: But you just never know and I don't know who his friend is or who.
1:14
Carmen Lezeth: You know what I mean.
1:15
Carmen Lezeth: I don't know who he's talking about.
1:16
Carmen Lezeth: It's not a mutual friend of ours or whatever, but it's so weird.
1:19
Carmen Lezeth: The things that will trigger you.
1:22
Rick Costa: Yeah, but that's definitely happened before.
1:24
Rick Costa: I'm like you know, something happened, I should be crying.
1:26
Rick Costa: Another thing happened, I should be crying and then another thing happened.
1:29
Rick Costa: I'm like that I shouldn't cry, but it just the dam breaks and the water starts pouring it.
1:37
Carmen Lezeth: Just I was like everything's cool.
1:38
Carmen Lezeth: Here's my thing about a parent passing that I'll share.
1:43
Carmen Lezeth: You never get over it.
1:45
Carmen Lezeth: You know, for me there's never the right thing for anyone to say, and I realized the more I shared the holiday with people, the more I'd have to talk about it and there was always a downer.
1:57
Carmen Lezeth: You know, and it's been so long, you don't ever get over anyone passing.
2:02
Carmen Lezeth: I don't think that you love, but you do get used to it.
2:05
Rick Costa: Yeah, it's been like really slow this week at work and I don't know if it's because it's weird.
2:10
Rick Costa: Well, it's that, and then they're having this really crazy storm in Florida where my company actually is.
2:16
Rick Costa: I'm in Connecticut but it's like, and my boss is like, are you guys okay?
2:19
Rick Costa: Because he's like I got to go outside and help to clean up with the neighbors, are you good?
2:23
Rick Costa: We're like yeah, it's dead, go ahead, do what you gotta do.
2:25
Carmen Lezeth: So it's weird that it's okay, I'm going to tell you I was mad at you when you sent me that text or whenever you told me, I forget when you told me about your work thing.
2:34
Carmen Lezeth: I'll tell you why.
2:34
Carmen Lezeth: Okay, so I live in Los Angeles, in Santa Monica, right?
2:39
Carmen Lezeth: And if there's a fire six hours from me, everyone and their mother is like Carmen, are you okay?
2:45
Carmen Lezeth: Everyone's texting me or sending me DMs, are you all right?
2:49
Carmen Lezeth: And I'm like, oh, my God, it's, it's in Northern California, thank you, whatever.
2:53
Carmen Lezeth: We had the first ever mother flowering hurricane in Los Angeles here.
3:01
Carmen Lezeth: I didn't get one text message.
3:04
Carmen Lezeth: Nobody was worried, nobody.
3:07
Rick Costa: I did, didn't.
3:08
Carmen Lezeth: I no, nobody, nobody.
3:10
Carmen Lezeth: I was shocked by it.
3:11
Carmen Lezeth: You didn't admit it, you didn't grasp the fact, but not when it was happening.
3:14
Rick Costa: I thought I did.
3:15
Rick Costa: I was like checking in, checking in.
3:17
Rick Costa: I did not.
3:17
Rick Costa: Are you sure I'm gonna go back and look?
3:18
Rick Costa: I didn't have to.
3:20
Carmen Lezeth: I mean, I think you did check in, but it was just weird, right, Because for me it was.
3:25
Carmen Lezeth: I'm not saying that people didn't check in after the fact.
3:28
Carmen Lezeth: Here's the thing about earthquakes in Los Angeles they just happened.
3:32
Carmen Lezeth: They happened, we deal with it, we move on, and thankfully I haven't been through anything so horrific.
3:38
Carmen Lezeth: You know what I mean.
3:39
Carmen Lezeth: I've maybe been through a shaker that maybe bounced something off a shelf for half a second, but nothing major.
3:46
Carmen Lezeth: Thank you, Thank you, thank you.
3:47
Carmen Lezeth: But this anxiety of hurricanes and the news and you have to shelter in, and everyone in Los Angeles was at the grocery store buying everything.
3:57
Carmen Lezeth: I'm like, okay, it's not going to be all that, I hope, because I was getting scared.
4:02
Carmen Lezeth: But you know, we didn't feel anything.
4:04
Carmen Lezeth: We didn't feel anything.
4:05
Carmen Lezeth: So, but yeah, so I was.
4:07
Carmen Lezeth: I was you kind of text me today, and then my other brother lives in Florida and I was like hope you're all right, whatever, because he didn't reach out to me.
4:17
Carmen Lezeth: I was like, well he, I knew he wasn't really near it or whatever, but it was just so funny.
4:21
Carmen Lezeth: I was like he didn't reach out to me either about no hurricane.
4:25
Rick Costa: I'm telling you I've got to look, I thought I did, I thought I did and I don't want to be annoying about it too I was like, let me just do like once a day, check in.
4:33
Carmen Lezeth: I think you checked in after the fact.
4:35
Rick Costa: I thought I did during because you were telling you were giving me updates.
4:39
Carmen Lezeth: I don't think so I think you're talking about.
4:40
Carmen Lezeth: I will have to figure it out, and if I have to apologize to you, I will.
4:43
Rick Costa: But I was, I was a little sad.
4:46
Carmen Lezeth: Nobody reached out to all of us here.
4:48
Carmen Lezeth: I mean, I reached out to like Andrea.
4:50
Carmen Lezeth: Andrea lives here and you know my friends and everything.
4:52
Carmen Lezeth: We were all touching base with each other, you know, because it was such an anomaly, but but yeah, I don't know, so I sent you that article about the LA in the LA Times.
5:02
Rick Costa: Oh yeah, that was.
5:03
Rick Costa: I love old people.
5:04
Rick Costa: That touched me.
5:05
Rick Costa: I love old people.
5:06
Rick Costa: That wasn't the point of the article, but it it touched me.
5:09
Rick Costa: Though, when you know the whole thing the husband died, and then you know it just touched me so.
5:14
Carmen Lezeth: so there's an article in the LA Times and I would show it, but I am so over trying to figure out how to do it.
5:21
Carmen Lezeth: Should I try?
5:21
Rick Costa: it one more time.
5:22
Rick Costa: I mean, are they going to even be able to read?
5:24
Carmen Lezeth: It's probably going to be too small, right, but let me look at what the what the name of it is, because that would be helpful for everyone.
5:31
Carmen Lezeth: It's called that personal touch at check stand.
5:34
Carmen Lezeth: Priceless is the name of it and basically what they're talking about in the article is they've installed in a lot of the grocery stores I'm sure everyone has experienced this the, what do they call the self?
5:48
Rick Costa: checkout.
5:49
Carmen Lezeth: The self checkout.
5:50
Carmen Lezeth: So the whole article is talking about how that has added to the isolation of all of us, because you don't have that contact with the person and saying that simple hello, whatever.
6:03
Carmen Lezeth: And then they put all these little I mean they started off with a, with an elderly woman who just lost her husband, and they always go to every Friday and they go shopping or whatever, and they always go to the same cashier and they bypass the checkout and they have like three or four of those examples.
6:22
Carmen Lezeth: And so I was saying to you that I thought it was a fascinating article because of how we love technology, but this feeling of isolation and being by yourself and just bringing it back to what happened on Monday with me and thinking about my mom, and then getting that email.
6:40
Carmen Lezeth: There was even that part of it where I wasn't even sharing that sadness with anyone, like I wasn't going to bother people about it because that's what it feels like.
6:48
Carmen Lezeth: You don't want to bother people, you know.
6:51
Carmen Lezeth: But you read the article.
6:52
Carmen Lezeth: What did you think I mean, besides the fact that you love old people?
6:54
Carmen Lezeth: It's so funny.
6:56
Rick Costa: And just, you know stories always get to people.
6:59
Rick Costa: You know good stories always grasp people's attention.
7:01
Rick Costa: But I think a good question, before we even go further to ask everybody, including us, let's say you're in let's say you're in Walmart or supermarket, whatever, and there you are, you have self checkout or you have a person.
7:15
Rick Costa: Where do you go to?
7:16
Rick Costa: And I'm not gonna lie, I go to the person If there if you go to the person.
7:21
Rick Costa: I do I do.
7:23
Rick Costa: I go to the person.
7:24
Rick Costa: I rather deal with a person and then if something's wrong they're right there.
7:27
Rick Costa: They can deal with immediately whether they're like.
7:28
Rick Costa: I need help over here, but you know what?
7:30
Carmen Lezeth: I don't know if it's where I live, but the self checkout is not only faster, but there's always a person there, always a person.
7:39
Rick Costa: There is.
7:40
Rick Costa: There is hey, Chris, Chris in the book.
7:43
Carmen Lezeth: Hey, chris, wait, is that his name, chris?
7:45
Rick Costa: Chris, yeah.
7:46
Carmen Lezeth: Hi Chris, in the Netherlands there is a designated slow checkout for quote unquote people.
7:52
Carmen Lezeth: I mean, I'm saying I know the person at our self checkout thing because he's always there and I, yeah, I don't go into the.
8:02
Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, I don't know.
8:04
Carmen Lezeth: Okay, melannie goes to the person too.
8:07
Rick Costa: And I decided never use self checkout.
8:09
Rick Costa: Like if it's like, if the lines are ridiculous and self checkout looks a little better, then I will go to self checkout.
8:14
Carmen Lezeth: But oh, my God.
8:15
Rick Costa: I'm the opposite.
8:16
Carmen Lezeth: If there's too many people at self checkout, I'll go wait in line because it goes quicker, like everyone goes to self checkout where we are.
8:23
Rick Costa: Interesting here.
8:24
Rick Costa: I think it's kind of like half and half, to be honest.
8:27
Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, that's an interesting thing.
8:29
Carmen Lezeth: I I didn't wow.
8:30
Carmen Lezeth: Melannie also goes to the person.
8:32
Carmen Lezeth: Do you go to the same cashier Like?
8:33
Carmen Lezeth: Do you have a favorite like?
8:34
Carmen Lezeth: In the article.
8:35
Carmen Lezeth: No no, okay, that doesn't faze you at all.
8:38
Carmen Lezeth: Okay, Do you do the chit chat?
8:41
Carmen Lezeth: Hey, kimberly, I don't do self checkout too many.
8:44
Carmen Lezeth: What's a bit to Mars?
8:47
Rick Costa: Might be a misspun.
8:48
Rick Costa: I almost forgot to pay for water.
8:48
Carmen Lezeth: Many I almost forgot to pay for water at bottom of the car.
8:52
Carmen Lezeth: I banned myself from self checkout.
8:55
Rick Costa: I've, I've almost done that too to be asked with you, because you forget it's on the bottom, you know.
9:00
Carmen Lezeth: So do you guys still have to?
9:02
Carmen Lezeth: You have to pick up everything in scan.
9:04
Carmen Lezeth: Is that what you do?
9:05
Rick Costa: Sometimes I'd be like oh, no, no, no, I can do it, and they have like a portable thing and they'll just come around and do it.
9:10
Carmen Lezeth: So in my neighborhood the checkout, self checkout, is actually a.
9:15
Carmen Lezeth: It's like there's a cashier but there isn't.
9:18
Carmen Lezeth: And you put it on and it scans through and it rolls.
9:22
Carmen Lezeth: It's not just the scan, so like if you have a lot of stuff or you have like more than two or three items, you put it on the belt and it and it goes down and then you can bag it at the end.
9:32
Carmen Lezeth: So it's like a regular cashier, there's just nobody there and it's just scans.
9:37
Rick Costa: I've not seen that in Connecticut.
9:39
Carmen Lezeth: And then you have the thing like if you, because I always buy like bottled water or bottled sparkling water and I'm not going to pick that up and so I always.
9:47
Carmen Lezeth: Then I scan that on the bottom, whatever.
9:49
Carmen Lezeth: But yeah, they're, yeah, they have it.
9:51
Carmen Lezeth: So it's like it.
9:52
Carmen Lezeth: I feel bad because I know people, you know.
9:55
Carmen Lezeth: Again it gets to that thing like how many jobs are people losing, you know, but then you realize that I'm probably learning something else or you know it's never going to be nobody there.
10:04
Carmen Lezeth: I mean I guess that's the idea.
10:07
Rick Costa: That's interesting, I've never even seen that.
10:09
Rick Costa: So self checkout, and it's got a conveyor belt and you just put it in the belt yes, and a conveyor belt yeah.
10:14
Rick Costa: Yeah, we don't have that here.
10:16
Rick Costa: That might be.
10:16
Rick Costa: That might be, you know, something I might want to prefer to do.
10:20
Carmen Lezeth: So there's always people at the end.
10:22
Carmen Lezeth: There's always I'm not going to call them cashiers, but I'm sure that's what they used to be but there's always people at the end and they're like you know, do you need any bags?
10:29
Carmen Lezeth: You want to see bags for you?
10:30
Carmen Lezeth: Blah, blah, blah.
10:31
Carmen Lezeth: Whatever they're like, do you need it?
10:32
Carmen Lezeth: And they'll come in and fix stuff.
10:33
Carmen Lezeth: And I'm always like oh, look at the lottery, it looks like it's a billion dollars.
10:38
Carmen Lezeth: Let me play.
10:38
Carmen Lezeth: Can you change this for me?
10:41
Carmen Lezeth: That's the only reason why I'm going to go up and really bother them, because you can't.
10:44
Carmen Lezeth: You can't get change from the scanner thing or whatever.
10:48
Rick Costa: Wow, yeah, I'm literally trying to think, and I don't think I've ever seen a conveyor about self checkout here.
10:53
Carmen Lezeth: You're probably going to get it soon.
10:54
Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, because.
10:55
Rick Costa: I think a lot of people.
10:56
Carmen Lezeth: I think it is faster.
10:58
Carmen Lezeth: But I was sad when I read the article and was like, oh yeah, I guess if you're not somebody who is constantly engaging people, you know like I'll talk to everybody.
11:13
Carmen Lezeth: I know everybody at the deli.
11:16
Carmen Lezeth: I know everybody at the bakery area.
11:17
Carmen Lezeth: I know people where I get my cookies.
11:19
Carmen Lezeth: Notice hiding saying anything about fruits and vegetables.
11:22
Carmen Lezeth: I'm not you know, but I'm serious, but I don't know those people, so I always say hi or whatever.
11:28
Carmen Lezeth: You know, and some people are not like, they're not friendly in this.
11:33
Rick Costa: Yeah.
11:34
Carmen Lezeth: Yeah.
11:34
Carmen Lezeth: That's true People neighborly, not neighborly people, that's true, I usually say hi.
11:39
Rick Costa: I say hi to the person how are you doing?
11:40
Rick Costa: Sometimes it's like how's your day, you know.
11:44
Rick Costa: But I won't get into like really deep conversation, but I'll be a little friendly.
11:48
Carmen Lezeth: And then you know your people at your store.
11:50
Carmen Lezeth: See, this is what I don't understand.
11:53
Rick Costa: I mean I don't.
11:54
Rick Costa: Well, now I don't go anywhere because of my situation, but when I did go I would at least say hello, how's your day?
11:59
Rick Costa: Why do?
11:59
Carmen Lezeth: you get close to reason, you must go to grocery store.
12:02
Rick Costa: Delivery I have everything.
12:03
Rick Costa: Everything is delivered, everything is delivered.
12:06
Carmen Lezeth: Okay, that adds to the isolation big time.
12:10
Carmen Lezeth: Yes, yes.
12:11
Rick Costa: But I do know, not know, but I recognize the people that deliver.
12:14
Rick Costa: Now there's one guy that I secretly call him Jesus, because he looks like Jesus with his long curly hair.
12:20
Rick Costa: I'm like my Jesus is here.
12:20
Rick Costa: She's like what he's a white.
12:22
Carmen Lezeth: Jesus, though You're talking about white Jesus.
12:24
Rick Costa: He's a white Jesus, but he looks.
12:26
Rick Costa: It's that curly long hair, Okay.
12:30
Carmen Lezeth: That's funny.
12:30
Rick Costa: Yeah, but yeah, that's the only people I see.
12:35
Carmen Lezeth: So then I mean, it goes to this thing about how, like the internet, see, I think it's a great tool because it allows people whether it's in your situation or not, people who are recluse is that what you say Recluse?
12:47
Carmen Lezeth: They don't like to go outside or they're not social beings or whatever.
12:51
Carmen Lezeth: They have the ability to make friendships and make relationships, and I think that's why technology is amazing.
13:01
Carmen Lezeth: You know what I mean.
13:01
Carmen Lezeth: Like, that's why I do embrace it and love it, you know, because I think it has the potential to make society so much better and, hope it, to more people.
13:11
Carmen Lezeth: But again, in that same article, they talk about how technology has added to the isolation of people, right?
13:21
Carmen Lezeth: So I was a little confused by that.
13:23
Carmen Lezeth: How do you-.
13:25
Rick Costa: Yeah, because I know, because, like, for example, my first job was McDonald's and there was like all these same people and they were elderly people and they came in every morning.
13:34
Rick Costa: I knew all their orders and exactly what they wanted and how much sugar they wanted, their coffee cream, whatever, like I knew them all because they came all the time, or some people were only on Saturdays or whatever, and they didn't come so much because, oh, I love the food at McDonald's.
13:49
Rick Costa: It's amazing.
13:49
Rick Costa: No, I think they came because they wanted to have an experience outside of home and be with other people.
13:56
Rick Costa: Right, they would congregate together and they knew each other.
13:59
Rick Costa: And I'm like you know, yeah, after a while, if you're alone, you start to go a little star crazy.
14:04
Rick Costa: So, yeah, I understand that.
14:06
Carmen Lezeth: So do you go stir crazy?
14:08
Rick Costa: Well, no, because I have y'all.
14:10
Carmen Lezeth: Because I have y'all.
14:11
Carmen Lezeth: Okay, kimberly just say yeah, rick, I've been doing the delivery too, but I really shouldn't.
14:18
Carmen Lezeth: Stuff is always missing or even open.
14:22
Rick Costa: Oh, I've never had that.
14:25
Carmen Lezeth: Can't you complain?
14:26
Carmen Lezeth: Can't you respond to them?
14:27
Carmen Lezeth: And complain then to the-.
14:29
Rick Costa: Yeah, I think I've only complained once and they took care of me.
14:33
Carmen Lezeth: So, I think, Kimberly, if you ever have any suspicion of anything, you can respond back to the app and they will take it.
14:41
Carmen Lezeth: They have to because if not they could lose you.
14:43
Carmen Lezeth: They could just a lawsuit wait and happen.
14:45
Carmen Lezeth: If that's what's going on right there, I mean not them giving you ideas.
14:48
Carmen Lezeth: I'm just saying that's a bad thing, I don't.
14:52
Carmen Lezeth: I mean, I don't get delivery, because it's also, you know.
14:55
Carmen Lezeth: It's the same reason why I don't drive to the grocery store, which is very unheard of here in Los Angeles.
15:00
Carmen Lezeth: I walk to the grocery store.
15:01
Carmen Lezeth: The only time I won't walk to the grocery store is if I have to, you know, like if I'm buying bottled water or something you know like.
15:11
Carmen Lezeth: I'm not going to hope that, although that's what I'm trying to see.
15:16
Rick Costa: How often do you go, like weekly?
15:18
Rick Costa: Me To grocery store yeah.
15:21
Carmen Lezeth: Oh, probably twice a week.
15:22
Rick Costa: Okay.
15:23
Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, because it's just me and so okay.
15:27
Carmen Lezeth: So this is funny.
15:28
Carmen Lezeth: Like people always like you should go to Costco.
15:30
Carmen Lezeth: You go save so much more money if you go to Costco.
15:32
Carmen Lezeth: I'm like I don't need 27 rolls of toilet paper, I don't need them, I have nowhere to put them, I don't need like big.
15:41
Carmen Lezeth: Like.
15:42
Carmen Lezeth: Someone did me the favor once and they were like I'm going to Costco, you want me to pick up anything?
15:46
Carmen Lezeth: This is before I understood what Costco was.
15:48
Carmen Lezeth: They brought me eggs and it was like two crates of eggs.
15:51
Carmen Lezeth: I am not going to eat them.
15:56
Carmen Lezeth: You know what I mean.
15:57
Carmen Lezeth: Yeah.
15:58
Rick Costa: It's more for big families, yeah.
16:01
Carmen Lezeth: I just, but also just I mean, I go to the regular grocery store but I also, first of all, I like the walk and secondly, it's because I don't need that much on a weekly basis and I do get fruits and vegetables and those don't last too long and I don't buy like I'll never buy like five bananas, you know, I'll just buy two.
16:21
Carmen Lezeth: You know what I mean.
16:22
Carmen Lezeth: So they'll go bad if I do.
16:24
Carmen Lezeth: And we said well, you contact customer service, they refund you, but I don't think they care.
16:30
Carmen Lezeth: Honestly.
16:31
Carmen Lezeth: I see what you're saying and also it doesn't matter in a way, because, like when I order food, like from a restaurant, if they mess it up and I, you know, let them know and, yeah, they reimburse, it still messes up.
16:43
Carmen Lezeth: You were just about to eat.
16:44
Carmen Lezeth: So I can only imagine, like if Kimberly ordered apples, you know, and they were gala apples, and she got whatever the other app.
16:52
Carmen Lezeth: I only eat gala apples, but you know what I mean.
16:54
Carmen Lezeth: She got the other apples, they were green apples.
16:56
Carmen Lezeth: It's going to mess up her apple pie cooking as long.
16:59
Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, so I get you.
17:03
Carmen Lezeth: I understand that is a problem.
17:04
Carmen Lezeth: I'm not.
17:06
Carmen Lezeth: I swear I was going to turn this off.
17:08
Carmen Lezeth: I'm not even looking at it, just turn it off.
17:11
Carmen Lezeth: Turn it off.
17:12
Carmen Lezeth: You know what it was.
17:13
Carmen Lezeth: I left it on in case you text me or something you know.
17:16
Carmen Lezeth: You want to talk about jealousy, or do you want?
17:20
Carmen Lezeth: to talk about characters on television shows and writing.
17:24
Carmen Lezeth: I'm just kidding.
17:27
Rick Costa: Yeah, we can talk about that eventually.
17:28
Rick Costa: But yeah, the stuff I've been telling you about, it's like I've learned so much.
17:34
Carmen Lezeth: WGA this is my magazine from SAG-AFTRA.
17:36
Carmen Lezeth: We're still on.
17:37
Carmen Lezeth: Oh okay, yeah, that's what that is.
17:39
Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, we get a magazine every month, but we're still on it's backwards for us.
17:44
Carmen Lezeth: It's backwards because, oh my God, no, I know why.
17:46
Rick Costa: I know why.
17:48
Carmen Lezeth: I know but this is why I said this thing that your camera needs to be authentically the way you would see you.
17:51
Rick Costa: No, you don't have to, you don't have to Drayden you said that.
17:54
Carmen Lezeth: You said that you were like if I were to see you in person, you wouldn't look the same, or something.
17:58
Carmen Lezeth: That's what you're saying.
18:00
Carmen Lezeth: What?
18:00
Carmen Lezeth: What you would say?
18:01
Carmen Lezeth: The way we see you is not the way you see on camera.
18:05
Rick Costa: Well yeah, just like when you look at a mirror, you're looking at.
18:09
Rick Costa: What you see in a mirror is not what everybody else sees.
18:12
Carmen Lezeth: I know, but this is what I see in the mirror is fabulous.
18:15
Carmen Lezeth: I want you to see what I see in the mirror.
18:19
Carmen Lezeth: Okay, so the reason so I always flip my camera.
18:24
Carmen Lezeth: I don't even know how to flip it back, because I do it on my actual camera, not on the yeah, don't worry about it.
18:30
Carmen Lezeth: I know, because it would flip everything right.
18:32
Carmen Lezeth: No, it would just flip me.
18:35
Rick Costa: I mean, yeah, your whole, everything would flip around, yeah.
18:37
Carmen Lezeth: Okay, let me see if I can do it.
18:39
Rick Costa: You're going to do it now.
18:40
Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, why not?
18:40
Carmen Lezeth: It would be funny, wouldn't it?
18:41
Rick Costa: I think you could do it.
18:42
Rick Costa: Let me see, can you reach me?
18:44
Carmen Lezeth: I'm looking, okay, yeah yeah, mirror.
18:47
Carmen Lezeth: Oh horrible.
18:48
Carmen Lezeth: No, oh my God, oh my God.
18:50
Carmen Lezeth: Okay, this is why I do it.
18:52
Carmen Lezeth: Okay, wait, let me put this up now, so you can see it perfectly.
19:00
Carmen Lezeth: On strike Say.
19:02
Rick Costa: I got.
19:02
Rick Costa: Oh, that's what that says, okay.
19:05
Carmen Lezeth: This is why I do it, because I can see my tooth, that I have a fake tooth, not a fake.
19:11
Carmen Lezeth: I have a dead tooth, which we've already talked about on this program, so I can see it.
19:18
Carmen Lezeth: It's a little bit ahead of the other one and it bothers me in pictures.
19:22
Carmen Lezeth: Look at my head.
19:24
Carmen Lezeth: No, we got to go back.
19:26
Rick Costa: But if you never said anything, nobody would know.
19:28
Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, but that's why I do it for me.
19:31
Rick Costa: I don't mind sharing.
19:32
Carmen Lezeth: I don't mind sharing, but that was kind of funny, because I remember you said that I was like oh, that looks so much more normal, right, everybody, right, Everybody.
19:42
Rick Costa: Oh my gosh.
19:46
Carmen Lezeth: Okay, let's talk about jealousy at work, because this is a thing.
19:50
Carmen Lezeth: This is a thing Do you want to share?
19:54
Rick Costa: Well, I remember like one guy he used to work at the company For some reason, I'm like yo, I've been here for 20 years.
20:03
Rick Costa: You just got here and you all act like.
20:05
Rick Costa: You're trying to act like you're my boss and I'm like but yet you're asking me how to do this, that and the other.
20:13
Rick Costa: I'm like stop acting like you're my boss, though, dude.
20:16
Rick Costa: I'm like why are you doing this?
20:17
Carmen Lezeth: Wait, did you tell him that though?
20:19
Rick Costa: No no.
20:21
Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, because that's such a thing.
20:22
Carmen Lezeth: Okay, so the guy was jealous of you, but you never confronted him about it.
20:27
Rick Costa: No, I was like okay, I don't want to deal with drama.
20:30
Rick Costa: I was like I'm just dealing with this guy and whatever, but do you ever get jealous of other people?
20:37
Carmen Lezeth: And this answer is interesting because work, work wise anywhere, I mean anywhere, jealousy in general, I mean it's not my nature, honestly.
20:47
Carmen Lezeth: I think it's everyone's nature.
20:48
Carmen Lezeth: I'm just going to stop you right there.
20:49
Carmen Lezeth: I was waiting for.
20:50
Carmen Lezeth: Everybody says that.
20:51
Carmen Lezeth: Everybody says I'm not jealous, I don't get jealous, it's part of human nature.
20:56
Carmen Lezeth: How could you not get jealous?
20:58
Rick Costa: I mean, even when I was married, if I saw my ex talking to somebody, I wouldn't be jealous.
21:02
Rick Costa: I'm like she's still coming home with me.
21:04
Rick Costa: So you talk all day you want to.
21:07
Carmen Lezeth: Okay, but I'm not saying in that instance, that's about being honorable and a good man, that's the I don't know.
21:12
Carmen Lezeth: But okay, this is why I wanted to bring this up, because I think we put a negative spin on so many things that are just natural to our human spirit.
21:22
Carmen Lezeth: Like, I don't think in general, jealousy is a bad thing.
21:25
Carmen Lezeth: It's what we do with jealousy.
21:27
Carmen Lezeth: You know what I mean.
21:28
Carmen Lezeth: That that is the problem, I think.
21:31
Carmen Lezeth: For me, what I see in jealousy that I think is a really great thing is that we end up trying to be better.
21:38
Carmen Lezeth: When we see something that we admire or are jealous of, like, if we really look at it, like when I get jealous of a woman, like if I see a beautiful woman and she wearing an outfit that I know I could never play out like I could never work that outfit, I get jealous because I'm like oh, I got to go home and figure out a cute outfit where I can be working my magic that way, you know.
21:59
Carmen Lezeth: And what I do with jealousy is I will give that woman I don't care who she is a compliment, because it takes it out of you and that's something I learned a long time ago.
22:11
Carmen Lezeth: And when it comes to work.
22:12
Carmen Lezeth: The reason why this came up at work the other day for me was, you know, I manage quite a few different people in different circumstances and I have these people who are so jealous of each other that every time we get into a situation where we're working on a project together, they're like no, no, I can do it.
22:29
Carmen Lezeth: No, no, I can do it.
22:29
Carmen Lezeth: And I'm like, oh my God, it's not a competition.
22:32
Carmen Lezeth: And if I talk to them separately, I'll be like you don't need to be jealous of him, and she'll be like I'm not jealous of him, I'm not jealous at all.
22:40
Carmen Lezeth: I'm like, okay, okay, okay, cool, okay, I'm glad we got that out of the way.
22:47
Carmen Lezeth: You know, I don't know, I don't know how else to explain that jealousy doesn't have to be a bad thing.
22:53
Carmen Lezeth: The fact that everyone gets so defensive, the fact that everyone pretends they're not jealous instead of seeing it for what it is, it's just a little instinct in us that lets us know that, wow, I want that, or I wish I could be that.
23:05
Carmen Lezeth: All right, like I'm so jealous of Beyonce, I wish I could sing and dance and, more importantly, wear them outfit she wear, and every day.
23:13
Carmen Lezeth: I don't know if you've been seeing her Instagram, you probably don't follow Beyonce, huh.
23:17
Rick Costa: I'm not sure, I don't think so.
23:21
Carmen Lezeth: Well, whatever, she is displaying all of her costumes in her concert and they're by magnificent fashion designers.
23:28
Carmen Lezeth: But the thing is, it's just remarkable how you know, because you got to be able to carry that off.
23:34
Carmen Lezeth: It doesn't matter if something's made for you, if you can't walk in that presence, you know, I mean, that's just the whole other thing.
23:40
Carmen Lezeth: But I'm like, oh my gosh, she looks so good.
23:42
Carmen Lezeth: You know, ain't nothing wrong with that, but if I started calling her the B word or I started being like, well, whatever, she's not really a good actress or something, but hopefully that's when jealousy becomes a problem.
23:59
Rick Costa: Yeah, yeah, I can see that.
24:00
Carmen Lezeth: That's what I'm saying.
24:01
Carmen Lezeth: But but you don't, you don't like confrontation.
24:06
Rick Costa: That's true, I can't deny that.
24:09
Carmen Lezeth: I'm going to do a Tony, bring it.
24:11
Rick Costa: Does it?
24:12
Carmen Lezeth: Tony, is it Tony who does that?
24:14
Rick Costa: I'm going to do another, tony.
24:19
Carmen Lezeth: I can't believe you just.
24:21
Carmen Lezeth: Oh, that was cruel.
24:22
Rick Costa: That's not happening on my show.
24:24
Carmen Lezeth: ever again, you cannot be cool to Tony.
24:26
Carmen Lezeth: Like, and he's been really good, from what I understand.
24:30
Rick Costa: He's going to get me for that.
24:31
Carmen Lezeth: if you have a nice person, I hope he gets you like really good too, because that was cool.
24:36
Carmen Lezeth: That was cool, and I'll be honest though that's good.
24:39
Carmen Lezeth: Hi Jean, I guess, I don't know, beyonce inspires you, but do you wish you had what she has instead of her?
24:47
Carmen Lezeth: Do I wish I had what she has instead of?
24:52
Rick Costa: And he's being instead of have the stuff instead of or be her.
24:56
Rick Costa: Is that what?
24:56
Carmen Lezeth: you're saying I don't want to be her, I don't know if she inspires me.
25:02
Carmen Lezeth: I said that was an interesting thing.
25:04
Carmen Lezeth: I don't know if she inspires.
25:06
Carmen Lezeth: I love her music, I do, you know.
25:08
Carmen Lezeth: I love dancing to it, I love the power in it, I love I kind of like her, her essence and how she's putting herself out there and I love that she's creating a space for artists, not just for herself, but you know these fashion designers and you know other women who are in her band and concert or whatever.
25:32
Carmen Lezeth: You know what I mean.
25:33
Carmen Lezeth: Like it's kind of the Taylor Swift thing too.
25:35
Carmen Lezeth: Like you just really admire people who are pushing that envelope and pushing us forward as a society, you know.
25:40
Carmen Lezeth: But I don't know if she inspires me.
25:44
Carmen Lezeth: And do I wish I had what she has instead of her?
25:47
Carmen Lezeth: Well, first of all, I don't need to have something more instead of somebody else.
25:51
Carmen Lezeth: Like maybe we could both have stuff.
25:53
Carmen Lezeth: You know what I mean.
25:54
Carmen Lezeth: Like I think that's what you mean.
25:55
Carmen Lezeth: Like do I wish I had it and she didn't know?
25:57
Carmen Lezeth: I'm not that cruel of a person.
26:00
Carmen Lezeth: I wish we could all have everything that we individually want and need without stepping on someone else or hurting another person, or does that make sense?
26:12
Carmen Lezeth: Am I sounding?
26:12
Rick Costa: weird.
26:13
Rick Costa: Yeah, yeah, definitely yeah.
26:14
Carmen Lezeth: I wouldn't want anything instead of her, but but I just I like her.
26:20
Carmen Lezeth: I don't know, do you have an artist like that that you like, that you think is amazing?
26:23
Rick Costa: I mean my realm is more the Christian realm.
26:29
Rick Costa: So totally different people.
26:31
Carmen Lezeth: But did you not see my tiktok the other day about?
26:34
Carmen Lezeth: I smile.
26:37
Rick Costa: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, kirk Franklin, yeah, yeah that was so cool.
26:40
Carmen Lezeth: What happened right it?
26:41
Rick Costa: was awesome Did.
26:42
Carmen Lezeth: I ever talk about that I did on the Instagram not on here, but if you want to talk, Basically, what happened was I was walking in this area In Santa Monica, but it's like a very exclusive kind of in the canyon area and it's, you know, these beautiful homes and a lot of people don't walk there.
26:58
Carmen Lezeth: It's a very quiet place and when it's the weekend or whatever, I don't want to go down to the beach because there's a lot of touristy people, you know.
27:05
Carmen Lezeth: So I was minding my business but I had my head set on and I was, you know, I didn't realize I was singing so loud.
27:12
Carmen Lezeth: Anyway, so I'm walking down the street minding my own business, I have my head set on and I didn't realize it, but I was, you know, just doing my thing and I do, I do a little, not dancing crazy, but you know, I get into it or whatever, especially nobody's around.
27:28
Carmen Lezeth: And a bike came from behind me, they were on the street and it's these are little sidewalks is a very Well-to-do area.
27:36
Carmen Lezeth: So you know they got, no big sidewalks would be hanging around, you know.
27:40
Carmen Lezeth: And he went like this to me and and I was like what, what?
27:44
Carmen Lezeth: You know what I mean and he then he stopped and he turned to me and he said you are singing so on key, it's awesome and I didn't realize I was singing so loud.
27:55
Carmen Lezeth: And then people were walking towards me, right, so they were walking.
27:59
Carmen Lezeth: They weren't that far ahead of me, but they were walking towards me.
28:02
Carmen Lezeth: Whatever they're like, we love that song and I was.
28:05
Carmen Lezeth: So I Was singing, I smile, I was seeing it very loudly and I Singing voice.
28:12
Carmen Lezeth: I can't stay on key but I do not have a a Whitney Houston voice, so I was singing, I smile, so it was just very funny, but yeah, it was a great song.
28:27
Carmen Lezeth: It is a great song.
28:28
Carmen Lezeth: So back to you were saying your favorite artist.
28:33
Carmen Lezeth: I said do you have somebody that's like Beyonce?
28:35
Carmen Lezeth: That's why we brought up what's his name?
28:37
Carmen Lezeth: What sings the song?
28:38
Rick Costa: Kirk Franklin.
28:39
Carmen Lezeth: Kirk Franklin.
28:40
Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, religious yeah he's up there.
28:43
Rick Costa: He's definitely up there.
28:43
Rick Costa: Yeah, so many, though so many songs of his are amazing, really, really good songs.
28:49
Rick Costa: Fred Hammond it's another big one.
28:52
Rick Costa: He's pretty well known.
28:58
Carmen Lezeth: By the way, and that's the only song I listened to really, cuz you know.
29:04
Carmen Lezeth: I mean I listen to other gospel music, but it's not because it's the gospel music part of it, right?
29:10
Carmen Lezeth: The?
29:11
Rick Costa: one other song that almost everybody knew for some reason, of Kirk Franklin was stop.
29:16
Rick Costa: And when I think about there's a little crossover.
29:23
Carmen Lezeth: It go like, whenever you have a song, I mean that's what happened with Taylor Swift, right, she was a country singer, and then it it cropped whatever her I don't even remember what it was, but there was a song that crossed over and you realize that it was, you know, more pop or whatever.
29:37
Carmen Lezeth: It's kind of the same thing.
29:39
Carmen Lezeth: So yeah, I mean I Love listening, like if I were to go to a church and listen to gospel music.
29:48
Carmen Lezeth: That's a whole other ball game, that's.
29:50
Carmen Lezeth: That's a whole.
29:51
Carmen Lezeth: That's just an experience and that is quite powerful.
29:54
Carmen Lezeth: But I don't tend to listen to gospel music on a regular basis.
29:59
Rick Costa: You don't go to a Kirk Franklin concert.
30:02
Carmen Lezeth: I don't think I could do that either.
30:03
Carmen Lezeth: I Mean I would go to a church and listen to him.
30:08
Carmen Lezeth: That's what you meant.
30:11
Rick Costa: Church doesn't matter.
30:11
Rick Costa: The venue, I don't care.
30:13
Carmen Lezeth: Does he have concerts like Beyonce?
30:14
Carmen Lezeth: I'm sure he does.
30:15
Carmen Lezeth: Oh yeah, I think the antigo places yeah yeah, yeah, I mean I think if it was first of all.
30:23
Carmen Lezeth: I don't do concerts unless I'm VIP.
30:25
Carmen Lezeth: Again, I don't like crowds or what I hear Tony saying boozy, boozy totally, absolutely boozy and I have been to several concerts and VIP and one of my favorites was I saw.
30:43
Carmen Lezeth: Do you know who Gordon Sumner is?
30:46
Rick Costa: Sounds familiar.
30:48
Carmen Lezeth: It's his real name for what it's.
30:51
Carmen Lezeth: It's not the name he goes by, but it's his real name.
30:53
Carmen Lezeth: But I saw him twice, vip, like he was this close to me.
30:58
Carmen Lezeth: Come on, does nobody know who Gordon Sumner is such a easy one?
31:05
Rick Costa: sounds so familiar it is.
31:06
Carmen Lezeth: It's easy.
31:07
Carmen Lezeth: Okay, let me see if I can sing a song that he is.
31:09
Carmen Lezeth: I can't sing the chat slow by the way.
31:13
Carmen Lezeth: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah and every move you make it stink.
31:19
Rick Costa: Okay, cuz didn't I?
31:20
Rick Costa: Um, didn't somebody do a remake recently, or that?
31:25
Carmen Lezeth: You're talking about the compilation with puff daddy or something.
31:28
Carmen Lezeth: They did it as a song to Biggie Smalls and Tupac and Princess Diana and it's a.
31:33
Carmen Lezeth: They took his song.
31:35
Carmen Lezeth: Actually that's a really great video to watch because they did it like the Grammys or something and Sting comes up and sings his part, which is not really part of it.
31:44
Carmen Lezeth: No, they usually just.
31:45
Carmen Lezeth: They sampled his music and they're saying goodbye to Tupac and Biggie, but I'm surprised you knew that one.
31:50
Carmen Lezeth: I'm up to send you that link.
31:52
Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, yeah but um, but yeah, I saw sting and Good job, chris.
31:57
Rick Costa: by the way he got it.
31:58
Carmen Lezeth: He totally got it.
31:59
Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, your prize is Let me see who else I saw.
32:06
Carmen Lezeth: I haven't seen a lot of concerts because I don't like crowds.
32:09
Carmen Lezeth: I Hmm I saw.
32:11
Carmen Lezeth: Of course you know I saw George Michael.
32:12
Carmen Lezeth: Okay, regrets, that's also on the list.
32:16
Carmen Lezeth: Regrets I never saw Prince in concert.
32:18
Rick Costa: Oh, we talked about that before.
32:21
Carmen Lezeth: Heartbreaking, did you even like Prince?
32:23
Rick Costa: I mean, I think you asked this before.
32:25
Rick Costa: I think, there were definitely songs that I was like, yeah, it's nice, that's cool song, but I wasn't like a huge fan.
32:30
Carmen Lezeth: Oh my god, I was a huge fan.
32:31
Carmen Lezeth: I'm still here.
32:32
Rick Costa: I was kind of in the Christian realm things up.
32:35
Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, but you said okay, you got to stop saying that, because you sent me your YouTube list of 80s music and there's not one gospel song on there.
32:45
Rick Costa: Well, yeah, that was on purpose.
32:46
Rick Costa: All songs that I remember, songs that you literally can't get away from, because when you go to a store they're playing the radio and you hear all these, something you can't get away from.
32:53
Carmen Lezeth: That they're playing these songs, because I have not heard some of these songs in forever.
32:57
Rick Costa: Bob's, and I remember them like Long stick in my head.
33:02
Carmen Lezeth: Some of the songs I don't like that you picked though.
33:04
Carmen Lezeth: I mean there's over what?
33:06
Carmen Lezeth: 200 of them.
33:07
Rick Costa: So that wasn't, and I wasn't even necessarily trying to pick like oh, this is a favorite of mine.
33:11
Rick Costa: I was just trying to think like, oh, this makes me think of that time period.
33:16
Carmen Lezeth: Okay, so my regret is that I didn't.
33:18
Carmen Lezeth: I mean, that's one of my regrets is that I never saw Prince in concert, and Partially because when people that I knew were going to go, it wasn't like VIP and I wasn't even in a place to know.
33:30
Carmen Lezeth: I just I don't like crowds.
33:31
Carmen Lezeth: I don't unless I'm I know this is again we can hear Tony and Brian.
33:38
Carmen Lezeth: She's so bougie Like.
33:41
Carmen Lezeth: If I'm on stage and there's a lot of people, that's one thing, but if I have to be in a crowd of people, I get very Clustrophobic, I get very antsy, I get very quiet, which I guess a lot of people would like.
33:55
Carmen Lezeth: So that's, I don't like crowds.
33:56
Carmen Lezeth: So, okay, what regrets do you have?
34:00
Carmen Lezeth: Just one name, one regret.
34:02
Rick Costa: Like in life, in life.
34:04
Rick Costa: Oh hey, one big one that definitely changed my life was at a job that there was a.
34:10
Rick Costa: It was another I could have got like it was a promotion basically, and I wasn't even gonna go for it Cuz I just like I was happy where I was, it was fine.
34:19
Rick Costa: What?
34:19
Rick Costa: Yeah, it would have been made more money, but I'm like, but I'm cool here, I'm happy, this is like my family, I'm happy I'm.
34:25
Rick Costa: And then my boss was like, I'm sure, as everybody that I thought was gonna go for the job went for it.
34:29
Rick Costa: But you, I thought you were gonna go for it.
34:32
Rick Costa: I was like, really, I didn't even think about it, like I'm cool here, did it up.
34:35
Rick Costa: But she kind of was like I think you should try, you should try.
34:38
Rick Costa: And I was like All right, I'll try, but I'm not gonna get it cuz these other people are there better than me.
34:43
Rick Costa: But blah, blah, blah.
34:43
Rick Costa: Well, I got it.
34:45
Rick Costa: So yay.
34:46
Rick Costa: But it wasn't a yay Because three months later and I think I've mentioned this to you before they did a company-wide layoff and there was people in every department they got canned.
34:56
Rick Costa: So I was yeah, I talked about that.
34:58
Rick Costa: I think was either.
35:00
Carmen Lezeth: Right, right, right so that was a regret.
35:02
Rick Costa: I should have just stayed where I was happy I don't know.
35:05
Carmen Lezeth: I don't know.
35:05
Carmen Lezeth: I think it's good that you tried to move up, I Mean, did you feel it in your belly that you didn't want to do it?
35:12
Carmen Lezeth: But you didn't, because I just told you to.
35:14
Rick Costa: I didn't have any desire to, but Okay, yeah, that's legit, like I didn't.
35:19
Rick Costa: I didn't feel like, oh, this is something I should do, like in me.
35:23
Rick Costa: She just kept.
35:24
Rick Costa: She kept saying I think you should try, she could try.
35:26
Rick Costa: I'm like all right, I'll try, I'm not gonna get it.
35:28
Rick Costa: I didn't think I'm gonna get it and I got it.
35:30
Carmen Lezeth: I Think you know I have another regret.
35:33
Carmen Lezeth: I bought a condo In Brentwood.
35:37
Carmen Lezeth: This was before the crash, you know, before the the the economy Did the downturn in 2007, 2008?
35:45
Carmen Lezeth: Because before then everyone was like you have to buy real estate, you have to do.
35:50
Carmen Lezeth: And I had a business manager at the time who was like you cannot be giving your money away, you have to invest.
35:56
Carmen Lezeth: You can't write this as a tax write-off and the thing is I liked giving my like.
36:00
Carmen Lezeth: When I had money, I liked giving it away.
36:02
Carmen Lezeth: I don't know why people think giving money away Doesn't make you happy and I don't know why everyone, everybody always gives money away and it has to be a tax write-off.
36:12
Carmen Lezeth: Hey, rich people, it doesn't.
36:14
Carmen Lezeth: It doesn't have to be a mother flowering tax write-off.
36:17
Rick Costa: You know what you?
36:18
Carmen Lezeth: just give money away and help people.
36:21
Carmen Lezeth: You know, it's one of my my pet peeves about rich people.
36:25
Carmen Lezeth: They always want to give money away because it's a tax write-off, so it's doing something for them, so it's not really a genuine help.
36:32
Carmen Lezeth: And here's the thing you can't help individual people Because you can't get a tax write-off if they're not a nonprofit.
36:39
Carmen Lezeth: So it's that weird thing.
36:40
Carmen Lezeth: So I, you know I was making all of this money.
36:43
Carmen Lezeth: I was Beyond belief and I was giving my money away and everybody, and their mother, who I knew, was telling me you have to buy a condo, you have to buy property, you have to do this.
36:54
Carmen Lezeth: And that was one of the biggest mistakes of my life.
36:56
Carmen Lezeth: You know it was.
36:58
Carmen Lezeth: It was a beautiful condo, is fantastic, but I ended up having like four floods, I ended up being miserable and then the economy turned, so I ended up losing it anyway.
37:08
Carmen Lezeth: Rich people give money away to their own foundation.
37:12
Carmen Lezeth: Those are corrupt rich people, chris.
37:14
Carmen Lezeth: But yes, those are.
37:16
Carmen Lezeth: Those are people who do it wrong.
37:17
Carmen Lezeth: But there are people who do it right and they give money to their foundation or they give money to other foundations and I ain't got no issues with that.
37:24
Carmen Lezeth: If you help and people.
37:25
Carmen Lezeth: I ain't gonna be mad at you about that, but because I've worked for so many wealthy people, what bothers me is, instead of just helping people out, the kindness of your heart and realizing that this, there is such a joy that happens when you get and look at, I ain't got no money.
37:42
Carmen Lezeth: I'm just saying from my little experience, when I give to people and they don't even ask for it, like you just helping somebody, there is such a joy in my heart for you get something out of that.
37:55
Carmen Lezeth: That's bigger than a tax write-off and I don't know what.
37:59
Carmen Lezeth: Yes, bill and Melinda Gates.
38:01
Carmen Lezeth: I think my, my, my Respect for them came from the fact that Warren Buffett gave all of his money to them and said Do what you need to do with this, you know, I mean, which I think is kind of cool, and his kids.
38:14
Carmen Lezeth: You know his kids are fine, but they're not inheriting all his wealth, which I think is amazing.
38:19
Carmen Lezeth: No, but he's the extreme.
38:22
Carmen Lezeth: You know he's not the nor, but it gets to that thing where how much money does one person need?
38:26
Carmen Lezeth: I mean, you know, you know, and it's sad, and especially in this country, like you know, a billion isn't enough.
38:37
Rick Costa: Yeah, that's crazy.
38:38
Rick Costa: It's crazy.
38:39
Rick Costa: I remember in um in school probably High school more who remembers cassette tapes?
38:45
Rick Costa: So there's these little squirish and I used to just like make take top ten hits, whatever, and just give people cassettes of oh, why are you giving this to me?
38:57
Rick Costa: Cause don't you like this kind of music.
38:59
Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, okay when boys know you, me, though, I knew they liked me.
39:04
Rick Costa: Oh no, I just did it because I'm like I just I like to just be generous and give stuff.
39:08
Rick Costa: You like this kind of music right here, Take it, oh.
39:11
Rick Costa: Or I would make like if somebody was like I'm getting it work, I'm gonna work out, but uh, so I'd find songs that were good for work out.
39:17
Rick Costa: I'm like yeah, I made this for you.
39:18
Rick Costa: Like really, what do you want?
39:19
Rick Costa: Nothing, I just give it.
39:21
Rick Costa: Just take it why are you thinking back?
39:23
Carmen Lezeth: But I think back then too.
39:24
Carmen Lezeth: I don't know about you, but I don't think there was such a a Weirdness about doing things for other people.
39:31
Rick Costa: You know, Even even this article, just to bring it back full circle what so funny made me think of a video I just saw and I shared it with a few people.
39:38
Rick Costa: So it was the son in the kitchen.
39:41
Rick Costa: He was cooking something in a pan and he was obviously listening to Mariah Carey and he was singing really loud.
39:48
Rick Costa: But you can hear the Mariah Carey song okay.
39:51
Rick Costa: And the parents are look at him like you doing, what are you doing?
39:53
Rick Costa: So he's just jammed that it up and then all of a sudden it switches to him.
40:08
Carmen Lezeth: You never want to sing out loud.
40:10
Carmen Lezeth: Tomorrow I carry cuz she hits them notes One of my favorite moments all the time, and this is like a regular thing me and my goddaughter do.
40:21
Carmen Lezeth: She's 15, she's gonna be 15.
40:24
Carmen Lezeth: Every time I pick her up, we always listen to George Michaels careless whisper and we both sing it at the top of my lungs because, like, it's just funny, because, you know, not singing Wonderfully, but it's been our thing since she was a little kid is just so funny, you know.
40:44
Carmen Lezeth: But I imagine that, like if you turned off the sound, oh, he's so wrong.
40:50
Carmen Lezeth: Okay, I'm sorry.
40:53
Rick Costa: There's just something fun about watching somebody sing with joy, even if their voices and good, but you see they're having fun.
40:59
Rick Costa: It's like go ahead, okay.
41:01
Carmen Lezeth: So here's the rest of that story though.
41:02
Carmen Lezeth: So when I got up the hill, when I'm walking with my headset after the people Acknowledged and whatever.
41:08
Carmen Lezeth: So I went this way cuz I wanted to walk up this really hard hill.
41:12
Carmen Lezeth: So when I get I'm trying to get back on track.
41:14
Carmen Lezeth: You know with.
41:15
Carmen Lezeth: I used to run that hill, so it really angers me that I can't run it anymore.
41:22
Carmen Lezeth: Charlie, that's one of the songs always think about we got to talk about.
41:27
Carmen Lezeth: Charlie.
41:28
Carmen Lezeth: So glad to see you, miss you.
41:33
Carmen Lezeth: So I walked up this hill and when I got up there, the guy on the bike he rode all the way up there so he was dying right.
41:41
Carmen Lezeth: So he had stopped and he was kind of waiting for me and so we met.
41:45
Carmen Lezeth: His name is van.
41:46
Carmen Lezeth: He's cool.
41:47
Carmen Lezeth: He lives in the neighborhood.
41:48
Carmen Lezeth: It was like a really cool thing, you know.
41:51
Carmen Lezeth: It's like it wasn't just that one moment.
41:53
Carmen Lezeth: So we started talking about the song.
41:56
Carmen Lezeth: He's not very religious but he likes his.
41:57
Carmen Lezeth: I'm like I'm not that religious either, but it's a really good song.
42:00
Carmen Lezeth: It was cool and it was about joy.
42:03
Carmen Lezeth: That's kind of what he said.
42:04
Carmen Lezeth: He's like you were just so in it.
42:06
Carmen Lezeth: He was like nobody was in your world, like you didn't even notice that the people were walking and then I was coming by.
42:12
Carmen Lezeth: He's like you were just so in it.
42:14
Carmen Lezeth: I'm like that's such a boozy.
42:16
Carmen Lezeth: I didn't say this damn, but it's such a you don't want to be singing that loud.
42:19
Carmen Lezeth: You know what I mean.
42:20
Carmen Lezeth: So yeah, that's so cool.
42:24
Carmen Lezeth: I can't believe Charlie's stopping by saying you got to have faith.
42:28
Carmen Lezeth: Mm-hmm, I got faith.
42:29
Carmen Lezeth: We talked about George Michael.
42:30
Rick Costa: Yes, yes, um, did you like to think?
42:34
Rick Costa: I gotta have faith to think, to think, yeah, some of the songs are cool.
42:39
Carmen Lezeth: I thought we were gonna keep singing.
42:40
Carmen Lezeth: I Miss George Mike.
42:43
Carmen Lezeth: I loved him, love, I still love him, I love him.
42:47
Carmen Lezeth: Those are my favorites Prince George, michael, rita Franklin, freddie Mercury.
42:52
Rick Costa: You know some of these people died early.
42:54
Rick Costa: Though my gosh crazy.
42:57
Carmen Lezeth: Well, I mean, we know why they died early.
42:59
Carmen Lezeth: I mean, prince, you know, was unfortunately Addicted to his medication and it's sad, right, it's sad.
43:08
Rick Costa: I mean like individually, why did this one?
43:10
Rick Costa: I'm just saying, why does it have to happen?
43:13
Rick Costa: It's oh People that have such amazing talent and they go so soon, you know.
43:18
Carmen Lezeth: I don't know and it's, and that's how.
43:20
Carmen Lezeth: Those are the moments when I feel old.
43:22
Carmen Lezeth: Right, those are the moments where I feel old because I realize all of my people that I listen to growing up Whitney Houston, michael Jackson, george Michael, all of that, like all of them, prince, I mean, those are me growing up.
43:37
Rick Costa: Yeah.
43:38
Carmen Lezeth: I'm trying to think who else?
43:39
Rick Costa: Whitney was the one that hit me the hardest.
43:41
Rick Costa: Oh did, oh yeah, that hit me the hardest.
43:44
Carmen Lezeth: That was.
43:45
Carmen Lezeth: That happened right before the Grammy Awards too.
43:47
Carmen Lezeth: That was.
43:48
Carmen Lezeth: That was in the right hand of Beverly Hilton, I believe right.
43:51
Carmen Lezeth: So did you cry?
43:53
Rick Costa: Oh yeah, Really, I was in shock.
43:55
Rick Costa: I was like what?
43:56
Rick Costa: No, that's not right, that's not real.
43:58
Rick Costa: This is you're lying.
43:59
Carmen Lezeth: Charlie, you need to come on the show.
44:01
Carmen Lezeth: That's what you need to do.
44:02
Carmen Lezeth: I'm going to get you to come on the show.
44:04
Carmen Lezeth: He's so cute.
44:04
Carmen Lezeth: Charlie is a very, very handsome man, very, very handsome, very, very married man, but he's still a good looking man and a beautiful soul.
44:15
Carmen Lezeth: I will also say yeah, no.
44:17
Carmen Lezeth: I think those are the moments where I start to realize my age.
44:20
Carmen Lezeth: Ok, wow, do you want to come up right now?
44:24
Carmen Lezeth: You can come up right now if you want to.
44:27
Carmen Lezeth: We have five more minutes.
44:28
Carmen Lezeth: Hey, charlie, what's up?
44:32
Carmen Lezeth: How are you?
44:34
Carmen Lezeth: I'm good.
44:34
Carmen Lezeth: I'm good.
44:35
Carmen Lezeth: I can't believe you jumped up on here.
44:38
Charlie Mattera: Because I see your stuff and it's always smart, so I pay attention, you know, because I could always learn something.
44:46
Carmen Lezeth: You are so wait.
44:47
Rick Costa: That's a good compliment.
44:49
Carmen Lezeth: Wait, here's such a compliment, but he just said that.
44:52
Charlie Mattera: Well, you know, there's so much stupid stuff going on.
44:55
Charlie Mattera: And then I know for a fact that she's a very smart lady plus very good looking, and it's all a compliment, and when I see her posts, they're always something I agree with and it seems that we seem to share a lot of the same sensibilities.
45:14
Charlie Mattera: You know, let everybody have a taste, let the country be nice.
45:18
Carmen Lezeth: You are so funny.
45:19
Carmen Lezeth: Wait where are you right now?
45:22
Carmen Lezeth: Are you at home?
45:23
Charlie Mattera: Yeah, I'm in the house.
45:25
Carmen Lezeth: But are you here in LA still You're not.
45:27
Charlie Mattera: Yeah, I'm not.
45:28
Charlie Mattera: Where am I going to go?
45:30
Carmen Lezeth: OK, but I thought you moved out of Los Angeles.
45:33
Charlie Mattera: Well, no, I live out in Glendora, out there.
45:36
Charlie Mattera: It's like it's hillbilly, it's 30 miles away.
45:41
Charlie Mattera: Yeah, wow, when I come to the West Side, my shoulders drop about two inches.
45:47
Charlie Mattera: Yeah.
45:49
Carmen Lezeth: Well, because you're relaxed.
45:50
Charlie Mattera: I'm shocked about how Brentwood looks.
45:52
Charlie Mattera: I was over there the other day.
45:54
Charlie Mattera: Horrible, it's horrible you know I'm not trying to toot my own horn, but when me and my pals were over there it wasn't like that.
46:02
Charlie Mattera: Ok, wait, we have to tell.
46:04
Carmen Lezeth: Rick Rick's in Connecticut Talk about where you're at.
46:07
Charlie Mattera: We're in Connecticut.
46:09
Rick Costa: He's in Connecticut Danbury, Danbury, Connecticut.
46:11
Charlie Mattera: Oh, you're right by the joint.
46:12
Charlie Mattera: I used to live in West Haven for a while, right At least in the hot dog.
46:16
Charlie Mattera: What was the hot dog place by the beach?
46:20
Rick Costa: Oh yeah, yeah, I know you're talking about.
46:22
Charlie Mattera: Who's at Frank's or something in Frank's?
46:24
Charlie Mattera: Yeah, I can't remember.
46:25
Rick Costa: But yeah, I know you don't.
46:26
Charlie Mattera: I've been a great hot dog and I'm from Coney.
46:27
Carmen Lezeth: Island and that's the place I was just going to say.
46:29
Carmen Lezeth: Did you hear that New York accidents?
46:31
Charlie Mattera: I used to go to Oxford Hill House, toad's Place, toad's.
46:39
Rick Costa: Place yeah.
46:40
Charlie Mattera: Toad's Place was great.
46:41
Charlie Mattera: I saw some great concerts there.
46:42
Charlie Mattera: And there was another place, Arcadia Ballroom, I think it was called.
46:47
Carmen Lezeth: Are these places you frequent, rick?
46:49
Charlie Mattera: No, this is 100 years ago, I mean, you know, this was really even.
46:54
Rick Costa: The food place.
46:54
Rick Costa: I've been there Toad's Place.
46:55
Rick Costa: I've never been there, but everybody's heard of it.
46:57
Rick Costa: I've been here the other place.
46:59
Rick Costa: I didn't know, but yeah.
47:00
Charlie Mattera: Yeah, I saw Johnny Winter at the Oxford Hill House and a place with like 40 people, wow no, it was insane.
47:08
Carmen Lezeth: And then I was saying yeah, but you know everybody, so this isn't really like.
47:12
Carmen Lezeth: I know you, so I know everybody.
47:13
Charlie Mattera: Well, I mean, I worked at nightclubs in Manhattan for years, so you know I was the guy at the front door.
47:19
Charlie Mattera: If you didn't pay me.
47:21
Charlie Mattera: If you didn't pay me, I'm sorry, you didn't get it.
47:24
Charlie Mattera: I'm still sorry to this day.
47:25
Charlie Mattera: I know it was cold out there, I didn't mean it, but you know it was my doctor's office.
47:32
Charlie Mattera: I had to pay the rent.
47:33
Charlie Mattera: It wasn't cheaper.
47:33
Carmen Lezeth: It was so funny.
47:34
Charlie Mattera: Wait, Charlie.
47:36
Carmen Lezeth: Charlie, how did we meet?
47:38
Charlie Mattera: I met you in the neighborhood, just popping an earphone In Bruntwood.
47:43
Charlie Mattera: That's right, you're staring at me, me staring at you.
47:46
Carmen Lezeth: You're staring at each other.
47:47
Carmen Lezeth: There was this tension.
47:48
Charlie Mattera: We did that we did that for a few years until we finally wanted to How's it going?
47:54
Carmen Lezeth: It was so cool, yeah.
47:55
Carmen Lezeth: And then I think we had mutual friends in some way, shape or form, or whatever.
47:58
Charlie Mattera: Well, you know as much as anybody can have friends in Los Angeles.
48:02
Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, but hey, can you wait, wait, can you talk a little bit about the writer strike?
48:06
Carmen Lezeth: I'm curious.
48:06
Charlie Mattera: Well, you know you should also be a screenwriter.
48:08
Charlie Mattera: I'm glad you brought that up.
48:10
Charlie Mattera: Wait, wait, wait.
48:10
Carmen Lezeth: Let me tell Rick, because, rick, people don't know who you is, baby, I know who you is, yeah, so he's a screenwriter and he's done more than a few movies.
48:19
Carmen Lezeth: But now you can tell us about the new.
48:23
Charlie Mattera: I'm also sad, you know.
48:25
Carmen Lezeth: Yeah.
48:25
Charlie Mattera: And I was getting work and then all of a sudden see my daughter.
48:31
Carmen Lezeth: Hi, I never met your daughter.
48:33
Charlie Mattera: That's Christmas.
48:34
Charlie Mattera: That's Christmas is her name.
48:35
Rick Costa: Oh, such a cool name.
48:37
Charlie Mattera: Well, hanukkah wouldn't work, so running down the street 10.30 at night.
48:43
Charlie Mattera: Hanukkah, come back.
48:44
Charlie Mattera: That's awesome, so Christmas.
48:48
Carmen Lezeth: Give us your idea about the writer.
48:50
Charlie Mattera: Well, you know, there's a lot of writers in the writer's guild that are making a lot of cake and I know these guys.
49:00
Charlie Mattera: You know everybody's on the picket line and everything.
49:02
Charlie Mattera: And you know I don't think the producers take them serious because it looks like it's a fucking party out there, like everybody's there just hanging out, you know, like they're in high school.
49:15
Charlie Mattera: But I think maybe all the writers should figure out.
49:19
Charlie Mattera: Maybe there's got to be a way to go somewhere else.
49:24
Charlie Mattera: You know.
49:25
Carmen Lezeth: Well, all the independence, right, yeah, all the independence.
49:28
Carmen Lezeth: Why do we?
49:29
Charlie Mattera: have?
49:29
Charlie Mattera: Why does everybody have?
49:30
Charlie Mattera: Why is there only one peanut farm and the five peanut farms that we could sell our wares to?
49:35
Charlie Mattera: I mean, it's sort of like you know, it's sort of like the standard oil in the old days.
49:41
Charlie Mattera: You know, you either sell to us or you sell to no one.
49:44
Carmen Lezeth: You sell to no one.
49:45
Carmen Lezeth: Well, I read an article I think it was the Hollywood Reporter this morning talking about why is?
49:53
Carmen Lezeth: Why are the studios not siding with all the artists and letting Netflix go on their own?
49:59
Carmen Lezeth: Because Netflix is the one.
50:02
Charlie Mattera: This all goes to the point of the studios.
50:05
Charlie Mattera: Ok, your studio, what are you doing?
50:08
Charlie Mattera: You're giving the deals to guys who can't act, can't dance, can't sing, can't write.
50:13
Charlie Mattera: They have no talent whatsoever.
50:15
Charlie Mattera: The only talent they have is they know a bunch of jaguars that are in the industry and they're not going to audition 12, 15 writers, steal the best portion of every pitch that came in there and then smash six of them together and think they can make a movie out of it and then slap their nephew's name on its screenplay.
50:32
Charlie Mattera: And the nephew is going to and then the nephew is going to kick them back 25 to 35% of the screenplay price because they've got their friend who's going to order out and buy it.
50:42
Carmen Lezeth: Do you know how many?
50:42
Charlie Mattera: producers.
50:43
Charlie Mattera: Do you know how many producers pay writers here?
50:45
Charlie Mattera: I'm going to give you 10 grand just to keep you alive, but I want 25% of your sale price.
50:49
Charlie Mattera: There's no watchdog community in the entertainment business how writers walk into meetings and are constantly threatened and your livelihood is threatened on a daily basis because you don't want to do uncompensated fucking steps that aren't in your contract.
51:09
Charlie Mattera: When you go in that room and they go, hey, could you do the producers polish and I'm like you know, look at them with contract.
51:15
Charlie Mattera: Here it's the rewrite, second rewrite.
51:18
Charlie Mattera: I see polish.
51:19
Charlie Mattera: I don't see nothing about the producers' files.
51:21
Charlie Mattera: Well, you know, we just want to put in a few things.
51:24
Charlie Mattera: So, basically, you want me to rewrite it before I get paid for the rewrite and then when whoever reads this and says, yeah, this is cool, Go this way or go that way, it's going to think I'm a fucking idiot because your ideas suck and you're not a writer.
51:39
Charlie Mattera: Rick, are you getting a fucking answer.
51:44
Charlie Mattera: No, my point is this.
51:45
Carmen Lezeth: Why does?
51:46
Charlie Mattera: the studio.
51:46
Charlie Mattera: Give the deals to the people who could actually make the potato, give the deals to the writers, and then the producer goes downstairs, like the old days.
51:57
Charlie Mattera: And he goes past one room and says I want a pirate movie, I'll see you next week, get me something.
52:02
Charlie Mattera: I want a Western, you.
52:03
Charlie Mattera: I want a gangster picture, get me something.
52:05
Charlie Mattera: Side-fly, I'll see you guys next week and you know I'm paying the bills.
52:08
Charlie Mattera: So let's see something.
52:09
Charlie Mattera: And you know what Writers would give their arm?
52:13
Charlie Mattera: They would.
52:13
Charlie Mattera: They would because we're not greedy guys, we're not asking for anything, we're just asking to give me a little, and you're only important when they want the draft Right.
52:25
Charlie Mattera: As soon as you give them the draft, they're not important anymore.
52:28
Charlie Mattera: And I sat in the room.
52:30
Charlie Mattera: I was working with Jim Cameron.
52:31
Charlie Mattera: This is no lie.
52:32
Charlie Mattera: I couldn't get to shit these days.
52:33
Charlie Mattera: I sat in the room in Jim Cameron's office.
52:36
Charlie Mattera: He sent me to Moscow to write a story.
52:38
Charlie Mattera: I was there six weeks.
52:39
Charlie Mattera: I came back.
52:40
Charlie Mattera: I'm in Light Storm on 10th at Santa Monica over there.
52:43
Carmen Lezeth: And I was sitting in the room.
52:45
Charlie Mattera: Yeah, I was sitting in the room.
52:46
Charlie Mattera: My office was Arnold's old office because I remember all the cigars were outside my window.
52:51
Carmen Lezeth: Here's all the name dropping.
52:53
Charlie Mattera: No, I'm not kidding you.
52:54
Charlie Mattera: No, I know.
52:55
Carmen Lezeth: Look, I know this is your life.
52:56
Charlie Mattera: I know Do you know, when they made the Titanic I was, my office was right next to the wardrobe, so they always used to come because I was sort of this normal middle size, charlie, come here, try on this coat.
53:07
Charlie Mattera: So I was like the model for half of the backers.
53:10
Charlie Mattera: You see, I remember the guy would come in and go Charlie, $5 million budget just for the wardrobe alone.
53:17
Charlie Mattera: Check out these earrings.
53:19
Charlie Mattera: And they weren't copies, they were original, antique, like $10,000 earrings.
53:25
Charlie Mattera: Everything Jim had was top of the notch.
53:30
Rick Costa: And.
53:31
Charlie Mattera: I loved him.
53:31
Charlie Mattera: And I'm sitting in a conference room with a bunch of creative executives which is sort of another name for celebrities or studio executives kids that they don't know what the fuck to do with.
53:43
Charlie Mattera: So they get them a job in the studio being a creative executive, torturing writers.
53:48
Charlie Mattera: You know stupid ideas.
53:50
Charlie Mattera: So I'm sitting in there enough to get right in the movie about this thing in Russia and the guy goes to me.
53:56
Charlie Mattera: One of the helicopter goes over the Urals and it passes by the Army, the secret Army base.
54:02
Charlie Mattera: Why is it painted camouflage?
54:04
Charlie Mattera: I swear to you.
54:05
Charlie Mattera: And Jim is in Rosarito Beach making Titanic.
54:08
Charlie Mattera: He's on the VIA satellite thing.
54:09
Charlie Mattera: And also and I look at him and I go Jim, I painted a camouflage because I ran out of fucking red paint.
54:15
Charlie Mattera: What kind of super fucking phone was that?
54:17
Charlie Mattera: I said why am I sitting in this meeting?
54:20
Charlie Mattera: Why am I listening to this?
54:21
Charlie Mattera: I said you sent me over there.
54:23
Charlie Mattera: I almost got my head blown off by the police.
54:24
Charlie Mattera: I came home, I got a story.
54:26
Charlie Mattera: Let me tell my story.
54:28
Charlie Mattera: And I mean they would sit there and they would say you know the character of Yuri, why does he?
54:34
Charlie Mattera: And I would say let me stop you for a second.
54:36
Charlie Mattera: I would say every character on that page, every woman, every man, every child, every comma, every word me and my friend, we made it up man, that's pieces of us.
54:49
Charlie Mattera: Each one of those characters is a little chunk.
54:51
Charlie Mattera: So when you talk about those characters like you know them, I got to tell you, it makes me fucking sick Because you're sitting there and you act like you know something, you have something to contribute, when you should say to me Charlie, what do you need from us Exactly To help you kill this shit?
55:10
Charlie Mattera: What can we do for you?
55:11
Charlie Mattera: So when you give this to the boss, he just goes great job, great job Charlie, great job Steve.
55:17
Charlie Mattera: And I could turn to him and go hey, man, these guys, if it wasn't for them, Right, it was all of us.
55:24
Charlie Mattera: We're not glory hounds, man, we're not the go.
55:27
Charlie Mattera: We don't look for the 15 credits on a movie.
55:29
Charlie Mattera: We just want to be treated like you know, like maybe half the way they treat these guys on Broadway Got right, and you know what.
55:37
Charlie Mattera: And I'm going to be like George Costanza, I should probably get out on a high note right Before I say something rude.
55:44
Charlie Mattera: You should, yeah, I'll say sure.
55:46
Charlie Mattera: I never work again.
55:48
Carmen Lezeth: No, no, it'll be fine, Bro.
55:50
Charlie Mattera: I can't get a job.
55:51
Charlie Mattera: Anymore, man, I can't get a job anymore.
55:53
Carmen Lezeth: They don't like me.
55:54
Charlie Mattera: I look them dead in the face.
55:55
Charlie Mattera: I mean what I say and I say what I mean.
55:57
Charlie Mattera: And they don't take that.
55:58
Charlie Mattera: Yeah, but you're from New York, Well you know, never been any different.
56:02
Charlie Mattera: It's not my fault that when I go into meeting in 30 seconds I know the guy behind the desk is full of shit and then it takes him another 10 minutes to realize that.
56:12
Charlie Mattera: I know that and I know he can't call a shot.
56:17
Charlie Mattera: He's got to go to 15 guys and if I pitch and if I pitch to him, I got to hope he could pitch to somebody else with the same enthusiasm and drive and passion and ambition.
56:28
Charlie Mattera: That's the problem.
56:30
Charlie Mattera: Producers and the powers that be take writers drive passion, ambition and they think it's difficult and it's crazy.
56:39
Charlie Mattera: No man, let that horse out on the beach.
56:42
Charlie Mattera: Let him run, man, he'll make you out, he'll do something really cool.
56:45
Charlie Mattera: And then if you want to fix a few things that it makes sense, they'll be more than happy to do it.
56:50
Charlie Mattera: They're happy to do it, you know.
56:52
Charlie Mattera: So on that note, calm anytime you want to see me, homeboy.
56:58
Carmen Lezeth: I will definitely, definitely be in touch.
57:01
Carmen Lezeth: You have to come up again.
57:03
Charlie Mattera: I like doing this.
57:04
Carmen Lezeth: This is good look at you know we're gonna have you come up proper official official guest.
57:10
Charlie Mattera: I'll get a haircut and everything.
57:12
Charlie Mattera: Beautiful baby man.
57:18
Charlie Mattera: Now no man when I walk beautiful man.
57:21
Carmen Lezeth: You know you're beautiful.
57:22
Carmen Lezeth: You know we'll talk later.
57:23
Carmen Lezeth: We gonna have you on the show watch, wait, wait, before I leave.
57:34
Rick Costa: Richard gear yeah nice meeting you you too bro.
57:43
Carmen Lezeth: Oh my god I was fine.
57:45
Carmen Lezeth: I love him, but you know his passion, everything he's saying about the right is build.
57:50
Carmen Lezeth: I mean, you know, I love that he came on.
57:54
Carmen Lezeth: That was awesome.
57:55
Carmen Lezeth: He's so beautiful, good man and knows everybody in Hollywood, everybody.
58:01
Carmen Lezeth: Like when I was saying that he was named off, it is like he's not even named dropping, he's saying name, he knows all these people and right, he has such a passion and you know what I'm gonna stop.
58:15
Carmen Lezeth: I'm just glad he came on.
58:17
Carmen Lezeth: I'm really kind of just shocked him.
58:19
Carmen Lezeth: You know, I'm always shocked by people who are listening to the show too.
58:22
Carmen Lezeth: It's such a compliment because I don't know.
58:25
Carmen Lezeth: It's not like everyone's reaching out to me to tell me I can see the numbers.
58:28
Carmen Lezeth: I just see numbers.
58:30
Carmen Lezeth: Hi, jerry, we are doing well.
58:33
Carmen Lezeth: How are you doing?
58:35
Carmen Lezeth: good is real people.
58:36
Carmen Lezeth: Charlie Matera is about as real as it gets and that little clip was just a little sliver of the kind of people I love.
58:45
Carmen Lezeth: You know they're amazing.
58:47
Carmen Lezeth: I love authenticity.
58:50
Rick Costa: You know what I mean that's what you get with a New Yorker totally yeah, but yeah, but that's how we met we.
58:57
Carmen Lezeth: I was like hey, it was kind of cool.
59:02
Carmen Lezeth: We just became friends.
59:03
Carmen Lezeth: It was really cool.
59:04
Carmen Lezeth: So your regrets you don't have any regrets that are bad.
59:08
Rick Costa: Oh, you have the job one, but still you got the job it's like a bad, yeah, but if I didn't take that job, I would have still been at that company and I would have probably eventually got higher on my own and it was a good company.
59:22
Rick Costa: I the money I made there is not even what I make now.
59:25
Rick Costa: I've been here this company for 20 years.
59:27
Rick Costa: It was good money but, yeah, it was not a good decision.
59:31
Carmen Lezeth: I think one of the regrets I have with work and it is with brand new school, when I used to work there and you know that's when I was making all my bling money or whatever had my condo, whatever.
59:40
Carmen Lezeth: I knew three years in I should have quit.
59:43
Carmen Lezeth: I was, you know, I I think I told you the story that one point.
59:48
Carmen Lezeth: I was in the office and Ben came into the office and he was looking at me and my one side of my face was drooping down.
59:55
Carmen Lezeth: They had to take me to the hospital.
59:56
Carmen Lezeth: They thought I was having a stroke, but I wasn't.
1:00:00
Carmen Lezeth: I ended up it was like a panic attack or whatever and it was balls palsy or Bell's palsy.
1:00:05
Carmen Lezeth: My mom's had that twice yeah, and right then I should.
1:00:09
Carmen Lezeth: It was like I was too stressed I should have stopped and I didn't.
1:00:12
Carmen Lezeth: I stayed for another five years or something and you know, we only got busier because we got bigger, and so my regret is, you know, not leaving a very toxic situation and, I'll be honest, it was because I was making so much money and everyone was like you're so successful, right.
1:00:33
Carmen Lezeth: So when people put that on you and you grow up in the hood and you grow up you know the way I grew up it's hard to be like I'm going to quit this job because I am stressed weird.
1:00:42
Carmen Lezeth: But I read, you know it is one of my regrets, yeah.
1:00:48
Rick Costa: I saw that you liked on my Facebook something I post don't allow a job to stress you to death, because that job will be posted online before you are obituary it's, that's just work, should not be.
1:00:59
Carmen Lezeth: I mean, unless you do what you love, unless you are in a position, like so many people who do have that grace, you know, like I'm sure getting back to Beyonce, I'm sure she loves doing her music and her concerts like, if you do what you love for a living, then you are so blessed.
1:01:19
Carmen Lezeth: If you can make money in a living and you can support your family and friends and you know what I mean like that that's that's a blessing that most people do not have.
1:01:28
Carmen Lezeth: Yeah, you know, and, and as much as you know, I love Gary V, right, I love, I love people who are authentic and on point and swear I mean you.
1:01:37
Carmen Lezeth: You notice that I've been saying not swears, so that you not get offended.
1:01:42
Rick Costa: I know you don't get offended but don't get offended, but have you noticed that I've been saying mother.
1:01:45
Rick Costa: I've noticed, but I have to say when.
1:01:50
Carmen Lezeth: Charlie was swearing.
1:01:51
Carmen Lezeth: I love him.
1:01:51
Carmen Lezeth: I love Gary V, but one of the things I disagree with him about, I mean there's like quite a few things, but you know, not everyone who's going to hustle and side hustle and do everything says is going to get where they want to be, and sometimes it's not their fault, it's just there's just too many I don't know facets to like.
1:02:21
Carmen Lezeth: There were just so many things that have to come together for things to actually work out, for you to be successful in the thing, you wanted.
1:02:30
Carmen Lezeth: It doesn't mean you shouldn't try.
1:02:31
Rick Costa: I'm trying every day yeah, yeah, but I was.
1:02:35
Rick Costa: I was remember hearing like stories of people that they're successful, but like, yeah, but you haven't heard all the stuff I did before that were complete failures, right?
1:02:44
Carmen Lezeth: I just never gave up and I kept going and going and then finally I got to, you know but there are people but this is what I'm trying to say there are people who will do everything and anything and do the side hustle and do everything they're supposed to do and try whatever, and they're still not gonna get to where they're going.
1:03:02
Carmen Lezeth: And here's why I bring this up, is why I bring this up, because I'm one of those people.
1:03:07
Carmen Lezeth: I'm one of those people I will continue, continue, continue, trying to do what I need to do to get to where I want to be.
1:03:13
Carmen Lezeth: I have goals that I haven't met, and then people will say but you're so successful, you've accomplished what now?
1:03:19
Carmen Lezeth: That's your vision, that's your version of what you think me.
1:03:23
Carmen Lezeth: Surviving the streets of Boston growing up is not a success thing.
1:03:28
Carmen Lezeth: For me, that's survival you know, that's not the same thing.
1:03:34
Carmen Lezeth: You know what I mean.
1:03:35
Carmen Lezeth: So I made it out.
1:03:36
Carmen Lezeth: But but we all love those stories, right?
1:03:40
Carmen Lezeth: We love the person who has nothing, who finds their way through.
1:03:43
Carmen Lezeth: I get it.
1:03:43
Carmen Lezeth: I'm not trying to dismiss it.
1:03:45
Carmen Lezeth: I'm saying those are not my goals.
1:03:46
Carmen Lezeth: Right, I'm still in pursuit of my goals.
1:03:48
Carmen Lezeth: But what I realize and I hate to sound corny here is I think it's okay if I do not succeed in the way that I believe I'm supposed to succeed, but how I perform on that journey.
1:04:04
Carmen Lezeth: That's what matters to me now.
1:04:08
Carmen Lezeth: Not only happened in the past 10 years where I was like you know what, I don't care if I don't make it as a actor or I don't make it as a writer, I don't have my own talk show or I don't, whatever.
1:04:17
Carmen Lezeth: All my little dreams are, you know, I mean I don't care about all that.
1:04:21
Carmen Lezeth: Now I want to make sure that the way in which I pursue all of because I'm never gonna stop cuz it's in me, it's in me it's not gonna end.
1:04:29
Carmen Lezeth: I tried, I have tried, I've been like okay, I was a dancer, I'm not a dancer anymore, I'm gonna stop performing.
1:04:35
Carmen Lezeth: And so miserable.
1:04:37
Carmen Lezeth: Making $250,000 a year at a company was not enough to make me be like yeah, no, I'm good, didn't help, so I know it's in me to always be this person, but now it's about.
1:04:54
Carmen Lezeth: I may not get to the destination that I have envisioned, but the journey and who I am in the process is everything to me now, everything and can you be happy along the way can you have joy along the way?
1:05:10
Carmen Lezeth: I say that because I think it's different.
1:05:12
Carmen Lezeth: I don't think you can be continuously happy, but I do think you can be in pursuit of joy all the time, every day.
1:05:19
Carmen Lezeth: That's why I use the word joy.
1:05:20
Carmen Lezeth: Okay, let's go.
1:05:21
Carmen Lezeth: Okay, all right, bye everyone.
1:05:23
Carmen Lezeth: Thank you so much.
1:05:24
Carmen Lezeth: See you next week.
1:05:25
Carmen Lezeth: Thanks for stopping by.
1:05:30
Carmen Lezeth: All about the joy.
1:05:31
Carmen Lezeth: Be better and stay beautiful.
1:05:33
Carmen Lezeth: Folks, have a sweet day.