Latest / Do You F*cking Mind? / The psychology of becoming a luckier person (8 steps)

Transcript

The psychology of becoming a luckier person (8 steps) · Do You F*cking Mind?

0:10
Speaker 1: Hello, beautiful beans, and welcome to the podcast episode of today.
0:14
Speaker 1: My name is Alexis Fernandez. This is to your Fucking Mind,
0:17
Speaker 1: the podcast where I help you change your relationship with yourself,
0:21
Speaker 1: with your brain and with your life. Anyway, So before
0:25
Speaker 1: we get into it, of course, I'm going to give
0:27
Speaker 1: you the happy daily reminder that, if you haven't already,
0:29
Speaker 1: please go and subscribe to my substack. We've got free tiers,
0:33
Speaker 1: We've got paid tears. If you are a paying member
0:35
Speaker 1: of my substack, you also get access to the entire
0:38
Speaker 1: Hotel Mindset app. We're gonna start launching brand new challenges,
0:41
Speaker 1: mental fitness, guided walking statements where as you walk, I
0:46
Speaker 1: tell you what you're doing with your life. Obviously, More
0:49
Speaker 1: Meditations is a meditation that gets uploaded every week. Affirmations.
0:52
Speaker 1: We've got fucking pep talks. What else do we have? Soundscapes?
0:56
Speaker 1: All the brain facts from the podcast are in a
0:59
Speaker 1: searchable format on the Hotel Mindset app. So if you
1:02
Speaker 1: are a member of my substack, you get a membership
1:06
Speaker 1: and access to the Hotel Mindset app. No, it's on
1:09
Speaker 1: the mind dot substack dot com. That's where it's at. Anyway,
1:12
Speaker 1: This episode is all about how to become luckier. There
1:16
Speaker 1: is a psychology behind becoming a luckier person. I'm going
1:19
Speaker 1: to break that down. I'm actually going to reference one
1:21
Speaker 1: study in particular about how different people perceive luck and
1:25
Speaker 1: how that actually changes how they approach things, and it
1:28
Speaker 1: changes how they prepare and plan for things in their life.
1:30
Speaker 1: It's really interesting. So I'm going to be referencing that,
1:33
Speaker 1: and then I'm going to give you a bunch of
1:34
Speaker 1: key points and ways that you can become luckier in
1:38
Speaker 1: how you approach things in life. So that's what you're
1:40
Speaker 1: going to learn by the end of this episode. And
1:44
Speaker 1: I also have a brain fact today which is going
1:46
Speaker 1: to be talking about the speed like component of pseudoephidron,
1:50
Speaker 1: Why that kind of speed like vibe in pseudoephidron or
1:54
Speaker 1: pseudo fed, why it takes away, why it works so
1:58
Speaker 1: well for cold and flu symptoms and it feels like
2:00
Speaker 1: you just feel miraculously better. What is going on the
2:03
Speaker 1: pharmacology deep dive, and also why they put it behind
2:06
Speaker 1: the counter. But I'm going to give you my takeaway,
2:09
Speaker 1: and I'm going to give you a life update takeaway.
2:12
Speaker 1: Slash recommendation is the dark chocolate moose at Harris Farm
2:16
Speaker 1: so fucking good. I have no words, no words other
2:21
Speaker 1: than go to Harra's farm immediately and get yourself some
2:24
Speaker 1: dark chocolate mooves. And if you don't have a Harras
2:26
Speaker 1: farm near you, fly to one. I don't know, I
2:29
Speaker 1: don't care, get to one. It's so good. Yeah, I'll
2:33
Speaker 1: be eating that for the rest of my life. And
2:35
Speaker 1: my life. Update. I fucked my wrist. Now, if you've
2:38
Speaker 1: watched any of my social videos earlier slash in the
2:42
Speaker 1: last four or five months, you'll know that on and off,
2:45
Speaker 1: I'm wearing this outrageous, very offensive wrist guard on my
2:49
Speaker 1: right wrist. And it's because I'm pretty sure I have
2:51
Speaker 1: de cour Vein's tendernopathy or whatever you want to call it,
2:55
Speaker 1: and it's probably from lifting the but it was not
2:57
Speaker 1: probably it is from lifting the babies. And I was
2:58
Speaker 1: going to acupuncture, and my acupuncturist was like, not only
3:01
Speaker 1: are you straining your non dominant hand, which is my
3:04
Speaker 1: right hand, because I'm left handed from lifting the babies,
3:07
Speaker 1: because we're doing everything with my left hand, but I'm
3:08
Speaker 1: like lifting and holding my thumb in this really like
3:11
Speaker 1: awkward position. But on top of that, after you have
3:14
Speaker 1: kids or during pregnancy, and soon after you've released this
3:17
Speaker 1: hormone called relax and so your tendons are all relaxed
3:20
Speaker 1: and they're not kind of set up as they normally are,
3:22
Speaker 1: so it's easier for you to strain or pull the
3:25
Speaker 1: tendon versus when you don't have this relax and hormone
3:28
Speaker 1: running through your body. So it's kind of this combination
3:30
Speaker 1: of the two things, repetitive hold and the relaxing. Anyways,
3:36
Speaker 1: so I went to the doctor, like it flared up.
3:39
Speaker 1: Then it got a little bit better because I was
3:40
Speaker 1: doing hits of acupuncture, and then it flared up really badly,
3:42
Speaker 1: like two weeks ago, and the like I talked about
3:44
Speaker 1: the fucking the person that's not that organized in me.
3:48
Speaker 1: I went to the doctor. I got a referral, but
3:49
Speaker 1: then it took me like ten days to call up
3:51
Speaker 1: the place to get a scan. I went in today
3:53
Speaker 1: for the scan, and for the first time in ages,
3:55
Speaker 1: the last three days, it's been feeling a lot better.
3:58
Speaker 1: I go in and they're like, it's really not that inflame.
4:01
Speaker 1: So we wouldn't recommend, Like your doctor's going to give
4:03
Speaker 1: your recommendation, but from our perspective, we don't think that
4:05
Speaker 1: you should get a quarter zone injection because the information
4:08
Speaker 1: is not that bad. And I'm like, the fuck, sag,
4:09
Speaker 1: what are the chances? What are the chances that out
4:14
Speaker 1: of the four months of extreme pain in my wrist,
4:17
Speaker 1: the information decides to go down and I have no
4:18
Speaker 1: pain the day the day that I get the scan anyway,
4:22
Speaker 1: so I don't know where to go from here. Hopefully
4:25
Speaker 1: it's just gotten better full stop. But if it chooses
4:28
Speaker 1: to go downhill tomorrow, I'm chopping my wrist off. Okay,
4:32
Speaker 1: that's my LAFE update. Now, before we get into the
4:34
Speaker 1: luck side of the episode, let's quickly talk about the
4:38
Speaker 1: cold and fluid tablets speed like drug pseudo apha drend
4:42
Speaker 1: suit of FED. I don't know if it's suit of
4:44
Speaker 1: fed globally, but at least in Australia it's what we
4:46
Speaker 1: call it suitofed. But have you ever taken suit of heed?
4:50
Speaker 1: I think most of us have, But if you haven't,
4:52
Speaker 1: you're missing out and just you feel more alert, more awake,
4:56
Speaker 1: It clears up your sinuses, You're not congested anymore. It
5:00
Speaker 1: is because the one of the key ingredients off pseudofed
5:04
Speaker 1: is very similar to an amphetamine. Okay, so it's not
5:09
Speaker 1: saying that pseudofed is speed per se, but they belong
5:13
Speaker 1: in the same chemical family. So pseudofed, the original pseudofed
5:18
Speaker 1: contains pseudoephidrin, and that belongs to a class of drugs
5:22
Speaker 1: called sympathomometic amines. So amphetamine and methamphetamines belong to that family. Okay,
5:30
Speaker 1: so they resemble your body's stress hormone. So we're thinking
5:34
Speaker 1: adrenaline also known as epinephrine, and nora adrenaline, which is
5:38
Speaker 1: known as norabenefrin. And the difference is on where they
5:43
Speaker 1: act and how strongly they are able to act is
5:47
Speaker 1: kind of going to depend on what effects it's going
5:49
Speaker 1: to have, because obviously an amphetamine, a methamphetamine has a
5:53
Speaker 1: lot of effects within your brain, whereas you're going to
5:55
Speaker 1: notice that when we talk about a pseudoephidron, it's not
5:57
Speaker 1: really performing on the brain. It's more performing on the
6:00
Speaker 1: referral nervous system. So when you have a cold, it
6:05
Speaker 1: feels like your nose is blocked because there's so much
6:07
Speaker 1: mucous in your nose, but it's not necessarily the case. Yes,
6:10
Speaker 1: there's some mucas going on, but one of the main
6:13
Speaker 1: reasons why you feel so congested. Is because the little
6:17
Speaker 1: blood vessels that are liigning your nasal passage become inflamed,
6:20
Speaker 1: they're dilated, and they are leaking. And then that fluid
6:24
Speaker 1: that there's leaking is leaking into your surrounding tissue and
6:29
Speaker 1: then that swelling begins to block your airways. So it's
6:32
Speaker 1: actually got to do with this fluid leaking and inflammation
6:36
Speaker 1: and dilation of your blood vessels. Not just like snot
6:39
Speaker 1: in your nose. Okay, this is blocking your airflow and
6:43
Speaker 1: it's making you obviously, it's making it hard figured breathing.
6:46
Speaker 1: You feeling groggy. You've also got you're sick, you've got
6:49
Speaker 1: a cold, so you're feeling like shit. Pseudoeerphodrine activates these
6:53
Speaker 1: alpha adronergic receptors in these blood vessels or on the
6:57
Speaker 1: blood vessels. Okay, so it's almost like a messenger telling
7:02
Speaker 1: those blood vessels that they need to contract. They're going
7:05
Speaker 1: to become narrower. Less blood is entering, less fluids are
7:09
Speaker 1: entering of slash. Less fluids are also leaking out or
7:12
Speaker 1: seeping out, and because of that, because of the constriction,
7:15
Speaker 1: that inflammation and that swelling goes down. Bang, you can
7:19
Speaker 1: suddenly breathe again, Your air ways are open again. It
7:22
Speaker 1: doesn't actually do anything to cure the virus. The virus
7:25
Speaker 1: cures itself in its own course of time, as it
7:28
Speaker 1: normally would, and it's not speeding up this recovery, but
7:31
Speaker 1: it's helping you breathe a lot better. You're feeling a
7:33
Speaker 1: lot better, You're able to go about your day. Okay. Now,
7:38
Speaker 1: other people say, well, a lot of people report that
7:40
Speaker 1: it makes them feel really awake, And the reason for
7:44
Speaker 1: this is because it's not just confined to the blood
7:46
Speaker 1: vessels in your nose. Pseudoephodron is working wherever it reaches. Okay,
7:53
Speaker 1: some areas it's going to reach more so than others.
7:55
Speaker 1: Part of pseudoephidron does cross the blood brain barrier, but
7:59
Speaker 1: way less than amphetamines would in crossing the blood brain barrier.
8:03
Speaker 1: But when it is inside the brain, it increases the
8:06
Speaker 1: release of neu adrenaline and a little bit of dopemine,
8:10
Speaker 1: but not as much as neu adrenaline. And this is
8:13
Speaker 1: kind of your alertness neurochemical. Among other things that it does,
8:18
Speaker 1: it keeps you alert, so of course that's why you're
8:20
Speaker 1: like up and awake, and you're feeling good and you're alert.
8:22
Speaker 1: So this is why some people notice that when they
8:24
Speaker 1: do take pseudofeed, they've got like reduced fatigue, they increased energy.
8:29
Speaker 1: They also have trouble sleeping, you might have a faster
8:32
Speaker 1: heart rate of feel like the jit is a little bit.
8:35
Speaker 1: So this is also why there's the nighttime version versus
8:42
Speaker 1: the daytime version. The reason there is a nighttime version
8:45
Speaker 1: is because you're trying to counteract that jittery alertness of
8:48
Speaker 1: the pseudofad that's entering the blood brain barrier. So the
8:52
Speaker 1: nighttime cold and flu medications, not all of them, but
8:54
Speaker 1: a bunch of them have a nighttime version, and they
8:56
Speaker 1: contain first generation antihistamines. Now, if you know the difference,
9:02
Speaker 1: there's first generation and second generation antihistamines. There's the drowsy
9:05
Speaker 1: antihistamines and the non drowsy antihistamens. And very quickly, I
9:08
Speaker 1: think I've already spoken about this a couple of times
9:10
Speaker 1: in the podcast, but for those of you that are
9:11
Speaker 1: new here, antihistamans histamans obviously within the body, we know
9:16
Speaker 1: what it does. It's kind of responding to something that's
9:18
Speaker 1: like an allergy, and it's making us, itchy all of that,
9:21
Speaker 1: but histamins in the brain are completely different. Histamins in
9:24
Speaker 1: the brain are one of the brain's key wakefulness neurotransmitters.
9:30
Speaker 1: So in the past, the first generation antihistamines were shaped
9:35
Speaker 1: as such, the molecule shape was able to cross through
9:38
Speaker 1: the blood brain barrier with no issues. So you've got
9:40
Speaker 1: the problem that, yes, an antihistamine is binding to the
9:43
Speaker 1: histamins within your body, which is what you want taking
9:45
Speaker 1: away like the sneezing and the swelling and the itchiness
9:48
Speaker 1: and all of that, but it's crossing into the brain
9:50
Speaker 1: and it's inhibiting your wakefulness, this wakefulness neurotransmitter, so it's
9:55
Speaker 1: making you drowsy. The second generation antihistamines don't cross the
9:59
Speaker 1: blood brain barrier. The shape of the molecule can't penetrate
10:02
Speaker 1: the barrier. Therefore it's only performing its act on the
10:06
Speaker 1: peripheral and not within the brain, not in the central
10:09
Speaker 1: number system, which is what we want. Great non drowsing,
10:11
Speaker 1: but to make you drowsy to counteract the effects of
10:15
Speaker 1: the pseudofed that's going into the parts of it that
10:19
Speaker 1: are crossing the blood brain barrier. We are trying to
10:22
Speaker 1: make ourselves drowsy, So we're giving ourselves a bit of
10:24
Speaker 1: that that antihistamine, and it's blocking the histamine in the brain.
10:27
Speaker 1: Therefore you're less alert and awake, and therefore you are drowsy.
10:30
Speaker 1: You are able to fall asleep more. That is why
10:32
Speaker 1: you've got the day and night cold and flu medication.
10:37
Speaker 1: So why isn't it as strong as an amphetamine? Amphetamine
10:41
Speaker 1: is much better at entering the brain than you know pseudoetheredrin.
10:46
Speaker 1: So once it is in your brain and fetamines are
10:49
Speaker 1: really good at increasing dopamine neure adrenaline, it enters in neurons,
10:53
Speaker 1: it does stuff with the transporters within the brain. It's
10:57
Speaker 1: cauding neurotransmitters to flood into sinas as things like that.
11:01
Speaker 1: But pseudoephrodrone is a lot weaker. So they might be
11:03
Speaker 1: a similar class of drug chemically, but there are differences there.
11:08
Speaker 1: And its primary job is to act on the body's
11:10
Speaker 1: peripheral adrenergic receptors, especially in blood vessels versus and so
11:15
Speaker 1: it's like got quite a mild stimulant effect versus something
11:17
Speaker 1: like an amphetamine or a methamphetamine. Now, the reason it's
11:20
Speaker 1: kept behind the counter is because it can be chemically
11:24
Speaker 1: converted into meth good times. And if you've ever watched
11:28
Speaker 1: Breaking Bad, you know when they're stealing all the stuff
11:31
Speaker 1: in the first few episodes because they're trying to make
11:33
Speaker 1: meth out of you know, so it's obviously kept, you know,
11:37
Speaker 1: under close watch. Many countries, including Australia, restricts the sale
11:41
Speaker 1: of these cordon flu tablets that have pseudoephdrin in them,
11:44
Speaker 1: and you often have to either show your idea or
11:46
Speaker 1: you're only like allowed to buy one or two packets
11:50
Speaker 1: and you have to have like your purchase recorded with
11:52
Speaker 1: your address and everything. And it's not because sudifed is addictive.
11:55
Speaker 1: Some people think, oh, suit off, it's highly addictive. It's not.
11:57
Speaker 1: It's just purely because of what criminal pharmacologists can do
12:02
Speaker 1: with it, which is pretty interesting. Anyway, that's the fucking
12:05
Speaker 1: brain fact of today. So let's get into the episode
12:09
Speaker 1: of today. We're talking about the psychology of luck and
12:12
Speaker 1: how you can become luckier.
12:16
Speaker 2: Sense, So let's begin with something that oh, a particular
12:24
Speaker 2: researcher observed is researcher Richard Wiseman observed he's the leading
12:31
Speaker 2: researcher studying luck and all the things that he observes around.
12:35
Speaker 1: Luck and this researcher Richard Wiseman love the surname Wiseman
12:39
Speaker 1: for a researcher. He found that lucky people are more
12:42
Speaker 1: likely to follow their intuition, their gut. They're better at
12:46
Speaker 1: tuning in to themselves. They really strengthen their ability to
12:50
Speaker 1: follow a hunch and follow through with this hunch or
12:52
Speaker 1: this intuition, and they really are able to lean into
12:56
Speaker 1: these instincts better. And then they become better at paying
12:59
Speaker 1: attention to their fear, ysical feelings, their thoughts, and all
13:01
Speaker 1: of that. They're those people that are really good at like,
13:03
Speaker 1: I just followed a gun instinct. I followed that hunch,
13:05
Speaker 1: I followed that feeling. People that consider themselves to be lucky, okay,
13:10
Speaker 1: and lucky people also expect good things. He says that
13:14
Speaker 1: people's outlook determines their experience. So when you expect good things,
13:18
Speaker 1: it's likely that more good things are going to happen
13:21
Speaker 1: to you. It's kind of that concept of like attracts like.
13:25
Speaker 1: So I wanted to before I get into all the things,
13:28
Speaker 1: I also want to touch on a particular study that
13:30
Speaker 1: was done, and this study is called with Good Luck
13:33
Speaker 1: Belief in good luck and cognitive planning, personality and individual
13:37
Speaker 1: differences by day and moultbe in two thousand and five
13:42
Speaker 1: this article. So if you want to look it up,
13:45
Speaker 1: type that in with good luck blah blah blah. Okay. Now,
13:47
Speaker 1: the aim of the study does believing you're a lucky
13:51
Speaker 1: person actually change the way you think about achieving your goals.
13:55
Speaker 1: So these researchers were interested in whether feeling lucky was
13:58
Speaker 1: simply this era national optimism or whether it had influence
14:03
Speaker 1: in motivation and in planning for your goals and in
14:06
Speaker 1: planning for your future and your life and all of that.
14:10
Speaker 1: So in the first study, they got two hundred and
14:11
Speaker 1: twenty two university students as participants, and they were measuring
14:17
Speaker 1: their belief in good luck, their optimism, and also their hope.
14:20
Speaker 1: And in this particular case, hope was measured using Snyder's
14:24
Speaker 1: theory of hope, which has two parts to it, which
14:27
Speaker 1: is agencies, so it's where you say, I believe I
14:30
Speaker 1: can achieve my goals and pathways, which is I believe
14:33
Speaker 1: I can find different ways of reaching my goals. So
14:36
Speaker 1: that's where hope was kind of measured. Specifically, talking about
14:39
Speaker 1: those things, they found that people that believed they were
14:42
Speaker 1: generally lucky, scored higher, and optimism, hope and confidence in
14:49
Speaker 1: reaching their goals. And luck wasn't just associated with like, oh,
14:52
Speaker 1: magical thinking. It was more associated with goal oriented cognition
14:56
Speaker 1: and being positive. Now, in the next study, instead of
15:01
Speaker 1: asking about personality and things like that, they asked people
15:04
Speaker 1: to think about an actual goal that they wanted to achieve,
15:07
Speaker 1: and they were looking at how their belief in luck
15:11
Speaker 1: influenced their planning, their confidence, and their expectation for success.
15:15
Speaker 1: And they found that if you believed you were lucky,
15:20
Speaker 1: that influenced how confidently people planned to complete a goal,
15:24
Speaker 1: how much confidence they had in it, how much they
15:26
Speaker 1: genuinely thought it would be seen to the end. But
15:30
Speaker 1: most interestingly, it depended on what type of luck people
15:35
Speaker 1: were referring to. Now, this is the crux of the
15:36
Speaker 1: whole episode. Okay, there's two different ideas of luck. So
15:42
Speaker 1: they found with all this research and all these two
15:44
Speaker 1: hundred and twenty two students that they surveyed and all
15:49
Speaker 1: of that, they found that there were two fundamentally different
15:52
Speaker 1: ways that people perceived luck to be. There's external luck,
15:56
Speaker 1: this is I just hope something would happens. Oh, my god,
16:00
Speaker 1: so lucky that that thing happened. Oh my god. And
16:02
Speaker 1: this is passive, so it's not really about control. It's
16:06
Speaker 1: more about chance. It's a fluke, it's a freak event,
16:09
Speaker 1: and I was just, oh my god, that was really
16:10
Speaker 1: lucky that that happened. But then there's internal luck. And
16:13
Speaker 1: this is what we're going to be talking about in
16:15
Speaker 1: today's episode. This is I'm a lucky person. This belief
16:19
Speaker 1: that it's almost like you're not waiting for a miracle,
16:22
Speaker 1: it's almost being a lucky person is part of your identity.
16:25
Speaker 1: You just think you're a lucky person. In general, good
16:27
Speaker 1: things are happening to me, good things are likely to
16:29
Speaker 1: happen to me. People who viewed luck in this way
16:34
Speaker 1: were more hopeful and more confident when they were talking
16:38
Speaker 1: about their future goals, when they were planning for their goals,
16:40
Speaker 1: when they were more likely to have a better plan
16:44
Speaker 1: for their goals in the future. Okay, it's kind of like,
16:48
Speaker 1: you know, there's people that think, here's an example. If
16:50
Speaker 1: you say I'm a lucky person, the likelihood of me
16:53
Speaker 1: getting a park right near the door is pretty high.
16:55
Speaker 1: So I'm going to go drive right near the door
16:57
Speaker 1: and maybe Hova for a minute or two, and someone's
16:59
Speaker 1: going to pull that, and I'm going to pull in,
17:00
Speaker 1: And those people, by default are always fucking getting a
17:03
Speaker 1: park right near the door. Someone who's like, I'm terrible
17:06
Speaker 1: with getting a park and if I'm not going to
17:08
Speaker 1: try that, I'm just going to circle around the back
17:10
Speaker 1: of the car park, because look at all those cars
17:12
Speaker 1: up there. What are the chances that I'm going to
17:14
Speaker 1: get into a car park where someone pulls out in.
17:16
Speaker 1: You've got to be in it to win it, right,
17:18
Speaker 1: So someone who believes that they are a lucky person
17:20
Speaker 1: are more likely to position themselves in situations in life
17:23
Speaker 1: where they're in it to win it. And someone who
17:25
Speaker 1: doesn't believe that they are a lucky person, and luck
17:27
Speaker 1: is more external, more like a lottery, more about chance,
17:32
Speaker 1: it's passive, they're less likely to be like, well, because
17:35
Speaker 1: I'm lucky, I'm gonna insert myself in there. They're like, oh,
17:37
Speaker 1: what are the chances, lo, So why waste my time
17:39
Speaker 1: going that close in when no one's going to pull
17:42
Speaker 1: out when I'm there, and I'll just go to the
17:44
Speaker 1: right to the back of the car park. Okay, that's
17:46
Speaker 1: just a very vague simplified example. But what this paper
17:53
Speaker 1: ultimately was saying that believing that you will succeed because
17:58
Speaker 1: you're lucky does change expectations. And when we have different expectations,
18:03
Speaker 1: we approach things differently. And I'm going to tap on
18:06
Speaker 1: that a little bit more. It changes your motivation. You
18:08
Speaker 1: are more motivated, more excited, more confident in something. And
18:13
Speaker 1: it also influences your willingness to begin. People that believe
18:16
Speaker 1: that they are lucky are more willing to start something
18:20
Speaker 1: and see it through. And these expectations actually do influence
18:24
Speaker 1: your behavior, which of course changes the outcome. Your behavior
18:29
Speaker 1: will change the outcome of something, obviously, with how you
18:32
Speaker 1: interact with people, how much you put yourself out there,
18:34
Speaker 1: how many times you're attempting something, how long you see
18:37
Speaker 1: something out for or stick something out for. And it's
18:40
Speaker 1: kind of related to self efficacy, optimism, and place ebo.
18:44
Speaker 1: It's not about magic. It's how your brain is approaching
18:48
Speaker 1: a challenge. It actually changes how you approach challenge. It's
18:51
Speaker 1: not like, oh, like is this thing out there? You
18:55
Speaker 1: actually are creating your own luck in a way. Now,
18:59
Speaker 1: keep in mind, of course, that study does have limitations. Firstly,
19:02
Speaker 1: it's involved only university students, so you can't assume that
19:05
Speaker 1: those findings apply to absolutely everyone in the world. And
19:10
Speaker 1: these researchers are relying on questionnaires, so there's obviously limitations
19:14
Speaker 1: when we're talking about questionnaires versus you know, double blinded studies,
19:18
Speaker 1: which is like the gold standard. So let's talk about
19:21
Speaker 1: a bunch of things to focus on. If you want
19:25
Speaker 1: to become someone that perceives themselves as a lucky person,
19:29
Speaker 1: instead of thinking luck is external, it's a miracle, Oh
19:31
Speaker 1: my god that that happened and not in your control.
19:35
Speaker 1: How do you become someone that genuinely starts thinking I
19:39
Speaker 1: am a lucky person. You know, if something's going to happen,
19:42
Speaker 1: it likely could happen to me. You don't think, of all,
19:44
Speaker 1: I'm the last person that would happen to Ah. You know,
19:47
Speaker 1: how do you do that? Number one, let's begin. I
19:51
Speaker 1: want you to think about luck favors motion. Remind yourself
19:57
Speaker 1: of that rite it as your phone screensaver favors motion.
20:01
Speaker 1: The more you put yourself out there, like I was
20:03
Speaker 1: talking about the car park and all of that, it's
20:05
Speaker 1: you've got to be in it to win it. And
20:07
Speaker 1: it's a numbers game. So the more you speak to people,
20:10
Speaker 1: the more new places you go to, the more different
20:13
Speaker 1: things you try on new things that you try, the
20:15
Speaker 1: more open you are to experience quote unquote luck in
20:20
Speaker 1: quotation marks, and the less likely you are to focus
20:24
Speaker 1: on things that are not so lucky, the more you
20:28
Speaker 1: are going to put yourself in a position where different
20:30
Speaker 1: things and good things are happening to you. Like I
20:32
Speaker 1: said with the car park analogy, if I think I'm lucky,
20:35
Speaker 1: I'm actually going to try and get a park right
20:37
Speaker 1: at the front. If I think there's a good chance
20:39
Speaker 1: that I could get that job. When I've got not
20:41
Speaker 1: one job on my resume, but I walk into that
20:43
Speaker 1: store and I say, hey, you guys hiring whatever, and
20:45
Speaker 1: I've got a good attitude, They'll be like, Wow, we
20:48
Speaker 1: like people that walk right into the store instead of
20:50
Speaker 1: getting a CV email to us. You probably don't have experience,
20:53
Speaker 1: but you can't teach vibes and you're fucking vibing will
20:55
Speaker 1: hire you on the spot. That kind of thing. You
20:57
Speaker 1: hear about that stuff all the time, where people who
20:59
Speaker 1: might not have been as qualified or might not have
21:02
Speaker 1: the credentials or this or that because of the energy
21:04
Speaker 1: they bring and they come in and they're willing to talk,
21:06
Speaker 1: They're willing to put themselves out there and put themselves
21:08
Speaker 1: in these vulnerable positions start getting all these crazy opportunities.
21:11
Speaker 1: And that's why they say, you know, right person, right time.
21:15
Speaker 1: You hear that shit all the time, right person, right time.
21:18
Speaker 1: It's because you're putting yourself there in the moment to
21:21
Speaker 1: increase your chances of luck. Okay, So if you think
21:25
Speaker 1: about that, luck favors motion, how can I start appearing
21:28
Speaker 1: in more places where I want luck to find me
21:32
Speaker 1: and where I want to find luck. If I'm trying
21:35
Speaker 1: to get a job, let's say I really want to
21:37
Speaker 1: make it in a kind of let's fucking I don't
21:40
Speaker 1: know acting again, do I use that analogy? I don't know,
21:45
Speaker 1: But like, what would I do? I would have to
21:48
Speaker 1: meet as many people in the industry as possible, and
21:51
Speaker 1: not just other actors and not just directors. But I
21:54
Speaker 1: want to meet writers, I want to meet directors. I
21:57
Speaker 1: want to meet this, I want to meet that. And
21:59
Speaker 1: before you know you are creating a bit of a network.
22:01
Speaker 1: You hear about an audition that you would have never
22:03
Speaker 1: heard about. How did you never hear about this new
22:05
Speaker 1: manager that's looking for this. You hear about this thing here,
22:07
Speaker 1: Now you've got your fingers in a thousand parts. This
22:09
Speaker 1: could work for any industry, literally, any industry. You could
22:12
Speaker 1: be more of a hobby. It doesn't have to be
22:14
Speaker 1: something about a career where you're trying to get more
22:17
Speaker 1: knowledge on something that you're trying to learn more about.
22:20
Speaker 1: The more you put yourself out there, the more opportunities
22:23
Speaker 1: you're going to have to meet the right people that
22:24
Speaker 1: are going to intersect you with another opportunity, and then
22:28
Speaker 1: another person and another connection and another. Luck favors motion
22:32
Speaker 1: put yourself in those positions where you're more likely for
22:34
Speaker 1: something good to happen. Okay, if I go walking around
22:39
Speaker 1: forty five streets, the chances of me finding money on
22:42
Speaker 1: the road is going to be higher than if I
22:44
Speaker 1: sat at home all day long. Okay. So it's just
22:46
Speaker 1: something really basic to look at. Just you're going to
22:48
Speaker 1: more places, You're talking to more people, You're seeing more opportunities.
22:52
Speaker 1: If you have the chance to go somewhere and apply
22:54
Speaker 1: for a job in person, you're doing it in person. Okay.
22:57
Speaker 1: The next one is start giving your all to as
23:01
Speaker 1: many interactions that you have with people. When you do
23:05
Speaker 1: have an interaction. Treat these people like as if it's
23:10
Speaker 1: a lucky encounter and it's not. So it's like for
23:13
Speaker 1: selfish purposes that I've got to get something out of this.
23:15
Speaker 1: But if your energy was I'm going to treat each
23:19
Speaker 1: encounter like I'm giving it my all. I'm going to
23:21
Speaker 1: make eye contact with this person. I'm going to genuinely
23:23
Speaker 1: ask them a question. I'm going to have a genuine
23:25
Speaker 1: engaging even if it's a three second encounter, it doesn't matter.
23:29
Speaker 1: I'm putting my best self forward when I'm interacting with
23:32
Speaker 1: the outside world. How do you think that is going
23:35
Speaker 1: to be well received. Here's a cute anecdote that I
23:38
Speaker 1: wanted to share. So my cousin recently got married and
23:42
Speaker 1: he this is how he met his wife. She's fucking legend, Tara.
23:46
Speaker 1: I love her so much. So he met his wife
23:48
Speaker 1: because he was at a bar and he sees Tiya
23:51
Speaker 1: across the bar and she's there and he notices her.
23:55
Speaker 1: And the thing that made him go up and talk
23:58
Speaker 1: to her is that she was at the bar. She
24:00
Speaker 1: was next in line to be served, but as the
24:03
Speaker 1: bartender got her to serve her, she then pointed to
24:06
Speaker 1: the person who was behind her and she goes, you
24:07
Speaker 1: can go first, and he saw that and he was like, wow,
24:12
Speaker 1: I've got to talk to her. She seems like a
24:13
Speaker 1: really warm, lovely person. He loved that she was giving
24:17
Speaker 1: her best to everyone that night, even at a night
24:19
Speaker 1: out when the bar's crammed, she's like just being her lovely,
24:23
Speaker 1: generous self. She's like letting someone go in front of her.
24:26
Speaker 1: She's having a good time, she's warm, she's smiling, she's
24:28
Speaker 1: engaging everyone. So he's straight away and that now they're
24:31
Speaker 1: the love of each other's life and they're now married
24:33
Speaker 1: and they're just the best fucking couple ever. So it's
24:35
Speaker 1: little things like that where you just give your best
24:38
Speaker 1: to people, you do nice things for people, you do
24:41
Speaker 1: you just put your best foot forward, right, You give
24:45
Speaker 1: your all to every interaction that you have, and you
24:47
Speaker 1: never know what interaction that would then bring. And it's
24:51
Speaker 1: not to say that you're going to absolutely meet your
24:53
Speaker 1: life partner after that, but you could make a friend
24:55
Speaker 1: out of that. I once did that once in La actually,
24:57
Speaker 1: where I let someone go in front and then this
24:59
Speaker 1: other he was like some baseballer. He came up and
25:01
Speaker 1: he was like, that's the nicest thing I've seen someone
25:04
Speaker 1: do all night. I'm shouting you and your friends drinks
25:06
Speaker 1: all night, and I'm like, sweet one, nice gesture, got
25:09
Speaker 1: me free drinks for the whole night. And mind you,
25:11
Speaker 1: sex was not expected from that, since the next one
25:19
Speaker 1: is talk about things that you like more, talk about
25:23
Speaker 1: your passions more, because we can all get swept up
25:26
Speaker 1: in complaining and like beating the dead horse. Who doesn't
25:30
Speaker 1: love to beat a dead horse? I think we all
25:32
Speaker 1: love it, love that so much. But even that out
25:35
Speaker 1: with talking about things that you love and talking about
25:38
Speaker 1: your passions, it is so nice and infectious when you
25:42
Speaker 1: see someone get excited and talking about something that they love.
25:46
Speaker 1: From my perspective, this is why the podcast came about
25:48
Speaker 1: in the first place, because I noticed it wasn't even noticed.
25:52
Speaker 1: I was told many times over by my friends and
25:55
Speaker 1: my family that every time I spoke about something that
25:58
Speaker 1: I had learnt that week at UNI, everyone's like, oh
26:01
Speaker 1: my God, like you, we can tell you're passionate about it.
26:04
Speaker 1: Your eyes light up because I'll be like, guess what
26:06
Speaker 1: I learned to dan? And then did you know that
26:07
Speaker 1: the brain? And when you've seen three D and what
26:08
Speaker 1: blahlah blahah, and I'd be so passionate and so excited
26:13
Speaker 1: that people were saying, God, this is like you should
26:15
Speaker 1: be teaching. This is what you should be doing. And
26:17
Speaker 1: that's when I thought, maybe I should lecture. Maybe this
26:19
Speaker 1: maybe that when you talk about things that you love
26:21
Speaker 1: and things that you're passionate about, you start uncovering things
26:26
Speaker 1: about yourself. People then mirror back to you things about yourself.
26:30
Speaker 1: Everyone was saying, this is this is a huge path.
26:32
Speaker 1: Look at you, you want to teach. Look how good
26:34
Speaker 1: you are at explaining things. This is so good. So
26:36
Speaker 1: then me sharing my passion got me more passionate, got
26:40
Speaker 1: me exploring things more. If I just kept it to
26:42
Speaker 1: myself what i'd learned at UNI and I thought, oh,
26:43
Speaker 1: you learned that you call, but no one else is
26:45
Speaker 1: gonna care, maybe I wouldn't have thought, oh, maybe teaching
26:48
Speaker 1: is what I want to do. Maybe, which then eventually
26:50
Speaker 1: led me to the podcast. You never know what opportunity
26:53
Speaker 1: is out there. And if someone talks to me about
26:56
Speaker 1: something they are passionate about, and I can see the
26:59
Speaker 1: fire in their belly, passion in their eyes, I don't
27:01
Speaker 1: care what the fuck the topic is. I'm into it.
27:03
Speaker 1: I'm fucking into it, and most people are. There's nothing
27:07
Speaker 1: more attractive in a person than someone who's passionate and
27:11
Speaker 1: who loves what they're talking about. It's beautiful. So if
27:14
Speaker 1: you started doing that, who knows how you're increasing your luck.
27:17
Speaker 1: You are becoming a luckier person by sharing what you love.
27:20
Speaker 1: You never know what interactions or what connections are around
27:23
Speaker 1: the corner when you do something like that. The next
27:26
Speaker 1: thing number four is be the luck in someone else's day.
27:32
Speaker 1: What could you do to make someone else's day luckier?
27:36
Speaker 1: If you have the financial means, imagine just paying for
27:38
Speaker 1: the person's coffee that's after you. And if not, imagine
27:43
Speaker 1: if you just held the door open, or help someone
27:46
Speaker 1: with their groceries or their prime or whatever upper flight
27:49
Speaker 1: of stairs. You're just that person that helping hand when
27:51
Speaker 1: they thought, oh, I'm gonna have to do this on
27:52
Speaker 1: my own. Bang, you help them out. Bang, you're that
27:54
Speaker 1: lucky person in their life. You know, you give someone
27:57
Speaker 1: an email introduction. The other day I met someone at
28:00
Speaker 1: event and she mentioned to me, oh, like, I just
28:02
Speaker 1: wrote a book, but I don't know anyone and this
28:04
Speaker 1: and that, and I said, listen, I'll introduce it to
28:05
Speaker 1: my publisher. I can't guarantee anything, but I did an
28:08
Speaker 1: email introduction to her and my publisher. I don't know
28:10
Speaker 1: where that's going to go. It's none of my business
28:12
Speaker 1: say that. That's their confidential business. But she was like,
28:14
Speaker 1: oh my god, so lucky that I met you and
28:16
Speaker 1: I had that introduction. Would have never been able to
28:17
Speaker 1: like meet this person on this publisher. And whatever be
28:20
Speaker 1: the luck in someone's day? Can you connect them with
28:23
Speaker 1: someone else? Can you give them an opportunity or a
28:26
Speaker 1: piece of knowledge or a good piece of advice or
28:28
Speaker 1: you know that energy breeds more of the same, like attracts,
28:32
Speaker 1: Like you, helping someone else only means more for you
28:36
Speaker 1: in the future. It's not a scarce city mindset where's like, oh,
28:39
Speaker 1: but if I help them, then I'm fucked on this
28:40
Speaker 1: and that, and like it's one it's me against the world.
28:42
Speaker 1: It's the opposite. Actually, it's if I'm engaging with the world,
28:46
Speaker 1: being world would engauge back with me with whatever attitude
28:49
Speaker 1: I bring, Right, So, how can you be the luck
28:51
Speaker 1: in someone else's day? Wouldn't it be so nice if
28:54
Speaker 1: you knew at the end of the day, Wow, that
28:55
Speaker 1: person's day was made so much better or they had
28:57
Speaker 1: their lucky break because of me. Such an feeling. Okay,
29:01
Speaker 1: the next one is and like this researcher at Wiseman
29:06
Speaker 1: at the start of this episode about expect good things,
29:10
Speaker 1: optimism and healthy expectation primes you to look for the good. Okay.
29:16
Speaker 1: It's like a really beneficial self fulfilling prophecy. It's like
29:20
Speaker 1: a really beneficial self fulfilling prophecy. Now, before I get
29:26
Speaker 1: tangled up in my own words, I always talk about
29:29
Speaker 1: managing your expectations, okay, and this is especially when it
29:33
Speaker 1: comes to relationships in particular. I love having high expectations
29:36
Speaker 1: for myself and for the world has to give to me,
29:38
Speaker 1: and I expect good things. But when I just to
29:41
Speaker 1: clarify when I do talk about managing your expectations, is
29:45
Speaker 1: you have to manage your expectations with people based on
29:49
Speaker 1: what they've shown you. Okay. So I when it comes
29:52
Speaker 1: to the world and opportunities and what's out there in
29:55
Speaker 1: the unknown, the more optimistic I can be, the better.
29:59
Speaker 1: But when it's if someone's shown me their behavior and
30:02
Speaker 1: who they are and what their character is time and
30:05
Speaker 1: time again, I have to manage my expectations around that.
30:08
Speaker 1: It would be a bit of a waste of my
30:10
Speaker 1: time to expect the best of someone who's always showing
30:13
Speaker 1: me that I'm that they just get the I just
30:15
Speaker 1: get the dregs of them. Okay. So when I refer
30:17
Speaker 1: to manage your expectations around people is if someone shows
30:20
Speaker 1: you who they are, learn from it and do some
30:23
Speaker 1: and act accordingly. But when we're talking about being a
30:27
Speaker 1: lucky person and optimism and all that and opportunities that
30:30
Speaker 1: lay around the corner, the more you can expect good
30:33
Speaker 1: things to happen to you, the more likely you're going
30:35
Speaker 1: to see good things available for you to grab. It's
30:38
Speaker 1: there for the taking. Okay. So a good example of
30:41
Speaker 1: that would be if I expect that people are going
30:44
Speaker 1: to be kind to me, and I just believe that
30:46
Speaker 1: people in general are kind, I'm not really going to
30:49
Speaker 1: have my guard up, and I'm going to be a
30:51
Speaker 1: lot friendlier to people. I'm going to try and engage
30:53
Speaker 1: in conversation with people that I might not know. I'm
30:56
Speaker 1: just already going to put myself out there. I'm going
30:58
Speaker 1: to be I'm going to start on a much friendlier
31:00
Speaker 1: note to people. If I expect that people in general
31:03
Speaker 1: are kind, right, if I expect that everyone's going to
31:06
Speaker 1: this person's going to behave like an anus. I'm not
31:08
Speaker 1: going to talk to them, I'm not going to want
31:10
Speaker 1: to engage with them, and like, oh, they're going to
31:11
Speaker 1: be an asshole or they're going to be a main honor.
31:13
Speaker 1: And that's kind of like the foundations of a lot
31:15
Speaker 1: of social anxieties as well. It's this you kind of
31:19
Speaker 1: already believe that something's not going to go well, so
31:21
Speaker 1: then you're like, I'm not going to put myself in
31:23
Speaker 1: the firing line. Okay, so how could you turn that around?
31:28
Speaker 1: Next one? If you knew you were going to be
31:33
Speaker 1: lucky today, if you knew that it was a lucky day.
31:36
Speaker 1: Let's say you'd a crystal ball and someone's like, if
31:39
Speaker 1: this is your fucking lucky day, how would you behave differently?
31:43
Speaker 1: Think about that before you leave the house, before you
31:46
Speaker 1: start the day. If you say this is a fucking
31:48
Speaker 1: lucky day, something good's going to happen to Mitchell, have
31:50
Speaker 1: I feel it in my waters, Something fucking good's going
31:52
Speaker 1: to happen. You're going to be in a better mood,
31:54
Speaker 1: You're going to be primed ready, dear ride or whatever.
31:59
Speaker 1: The saying is ready to pounce on the day. You're
32:03
Speaker 1: not going to be like, I'm not going to do
32:04
Speaker 1: it. I can't. I'm going to fucking not not engaging. Not
32:07
Speaker 1: everyone's a decadd can't not. Everyone's fucked. Oh what a shit.
32:10
Speaker 1: I can't wait to get back into bed. Fuck that
32:12
Speaker 1: fuck today. I can't believe I have to go to work.
32:14
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I didn't let me work from home today.
32:15
Speaker 1: Go I fucked my life. I just want to be
32:17
Speaker 1: in bed. What do you think is going to happen
32:20
Speaker 1: with those two attitudes? Who's going to be luckier with
32:22
Speaker 1: those two attitudes? Who's going to have more interactions that
32:26
Speaker 1: are going to point them in the direction that's going
32:28
Speaker 1: to help them get to where they want to go,
32:29
Speaker 1: That's going to help them plan better for their lives,
32:31
Speaker 1: or plan better for the gods that they want to
32:33
Speaker 1: see through to the end, or meet the right people,
32:35
Speaker 1: or have healthy connections, or find a new friend. Right. So, yeah,
32:42
Speaker 1: number seven, part of luck is looking at your setbacks differently.
32:47
Speaker 1: I was recently listening to an interview. I can't remember
32:50
Speaker 1: what podcast it was when I listened to so many,
32:52
Speaker 1: but it was someone the interviewer was asking someone it
32:56
Speaker 1: was like a business It was a business interview talking
32:58
Speaker 1: about like business failures and whatever, and they say, do
33:00
Speaker 1: you see the things that didn't work out as a
33:02
Speaker 1: failure And the interviewee said, well, no, no, even though
33:08
Speaker 1: they didn't work out, I don't see it as a failure,
33:12
Speaker 1: and like, frame it however you want. But I've got
33:14
Speaker 1: a different take on that. And I don't know how
33:16
Speaker 1: I used to think about failure, but the way I
33:17
Speaker 1: think about failure now, because I don't know if my
33:20
Speaker 1: words have changed over the last few years of the podcast,
33:22
Speaker 1: I've got a similar vibe on it. But the way
33:24
Speaker 1: I think about failure now is yes, I failed, Yes
33:30
Speaker 1: I failed. I think we're so scared of the word failure,
33:33
Speaker 1: but we need to turn that around instead of thinking
33:36
Speaker 1: that the word failure means so much. There's a difference
33:38
Speaker 1: between having failed and being a failure. When you fail
33:43
Speaker 1: based on your behavior or your lack of preparation, that's
33:46
Speaker 1: not saying that you as a person are a failure.
33:48
Speaker 1: I think we tie so much of what we do
33:51
Speaker 1: to our identity of innately who we are, and that
33:54
Speaker 1: is why people freak out so much about failure. If
33:57
Speaker 1: you can have a more casual sex relationship with failure.
34:00
Speaker 1: Then you're a bit more like, mah, it's fine, Like
34:03
Speaker 1: I've got failure, it's not really that bad. Don't shy
34:06
Speaker 1: away from failure. When you're more like relaxed about failure,
34:10
Speaker 1: then you look at your setbacks differently. I kind of
34:14
Speaker 1: like knowing that I failed at things in hindsight, if
34:16
Speaker 1: I'm in the depths of failing at multiple things, I
34:18
Speaker 1: don't like it. Obviously. I'm not some fucking, you know,
34:22
Speaker 1: altruistic whatever person. But I can look at my failures
34:26
Speaker 1: now and be like, that definitely was a failure for sure,
34:29
Speaker 1: Like that was a flop, right, And I like it
34:33
Speaker 1: because I learned from it, or I grew from it,
34:36
Speaker 1: or I knew when to call it quits, or it
34:38
Speaker 1: taught me how to quit, or it taught me how
34:39
Speaker 1: to get over something quicker. And then the next time
34:41
Speaker 1: I failed, I wasn't betting myself up as much as
34:43
Speaker 1: the first time I failed. But I actually don't mind
34:46
Speaker 1: referring to things as a failure now. And I've got
34:48
Speaker 1: quite a healthy relationship with my failures because I've had
34:50
Speaker 1: a few. So you've got you want to have a
34:52
Speaker 1: nicer relationship with your failures where it's like, well, character
34:55
Speaker 1: building shit, whatever. If you can look at your setbacks
34:57
Speaker 1: differently and look at it it's like, oh yeah, well
34:59
Speaker 1: that closed that, but open to this one, or it
35:01
Speaker 1: pointed me in a different direction, whatever, you will be
35:04
Speaker 1: luckier than if you look at a failure as being
35:06
Speaker 1: a mark on who you are as an individual and
35:08
Speaker 1: a representation or a reflection of your identity. Okay, So
35:13
Speaker 1: I think when it comes to forming your luck and
35:15
Speaker 1: thinking you're a lucky person, you can't say, well, lucky
35:18
Speaker 1: people never fail, because that's not true. Lucky people do
35:21
Speaker 1: fail all the fucking time. But like I said, it's
35:23
Speaker 1: a numbers game and you've got to be in it
35:25
Speaker 1: to win it. So there's going to be failures, but
35:27
Speaker 1: you're out numbering it by good things that happen as well.
35:31
Speaker 1: If you never put yourself out there and then you
35:33
Speaker 1: do and one bad thing happens, you're gonna be like,
35:35
Speaker 1: I'm not a lucky person of a fucking failure. But
35:36
Speaker 1: if you were to put yourself out there a hundred
35:38
Speaker 1: times and forty times bad things happened and sixty times
35:42
Speaker 1: good things happened, you'd be like, well, good things happened
35:45
Speaker 1: to me all the time. More than half good things
35:47
Speaker 1: happened to me all the time. Okay, so that's what
35:48
Speaker 1: I mean. It's all about reframing how you look at
35:51
Speaker 1: things that don't go well and just being more casual
35:53
Speaker 1: about it. It's not a big deal. And the last
35:57
Speaker 1: thing I want to talk about zero point eight is
36:01
Speaker 1: this concept of beginner's luck. You can learn a lot
36:04
Speaker 1: about beginner's luck and why it applies so often across
36:09
Speaker 1: the board where people have beginners luck, whether it's card games, surfing,
36:14
Speaker 1: fucking get whatever. So many people on something that you
36:17
Speaker 1: think you would require more skill do really well the
36:20
Speaker 1: first time that they do it, and then there's a
36:22
Speaker 1: dip in skill and then they have to earn that
36:24
Speaker 1: skill again. Why is this happening with beginner's luck? And
36:27
Speaker 1: you can actually apply this to your life. Okay, when
36:31
Speaker 1: you are an absolute beginner and you are a novice,
36:34
Speaker 1: and everyone knows you're an absolute beginner and a novice,
36:37
Speaker 1: there is zero expectation for you to perform, none from yourself. Well,
36:43
Speaker 1: some people do put expectation to perform when they're but
36:45
Speaker 1: that's just but in general, you rarely put expectations on
36:49
Speaker 1: how good you have to be because you don't even
36:51
Speaker 1: know what you're doing, and other people don't expect anything
36:53
Speaker 1: off you because they know it's your first time doing it,
36:55
Speaker 1: so then you just do it. You've got no expectations,
36:58
Speaker 1: so you've got no real pre she You're like, I
37:00
Speaker 1: was gonna try, I see how I go, and it's
37:02
Speaker 1: this kind of like relaxed. I'm having a good time
37:04
Speaker 1: because it's fun. I'm trying my best, but I also
37:07
Speaker 1: have no expectations. That kind of relaxed energy that you
37:11
Speaker 1: bring to it is not being tainted by I have
37:14
Speaker 1: to do this, I have to meet people's expectations. I
37:16
Speaker 1: have to meet my own expectations. You're not really focusing
37:20
Speaker 1: so much on what can go wrong. So by removing
37:22
Speaker 1: that pressure, instead of thinking I've got to be good
37:25
Speaker 1: every single time, you're just doing it and then you
37:27
Speaker 1: get lucky because you're doing it to the best of
37:31
Speaker 1: your ability. You've got a good attitude. You're probably having
37:33
Speaker 1: a bit of fun too, because you're an obvious you're
37:35
Speaker 1: not taking it too seriously. You're probably not competing either.
37:37
Speaker 1: You're just like a haha, I'm doing it whatever, and
37:39
Speaker 1: then before you know what, you do better than you thought.
37:42
Speaker 1: So then what happens as you start doing more of
37:45
Speaker 1: that thing is you start making mistakes. You now know
37:47
Speaker 1: what can go wrong, So now beginner's luck starts to
37:50
Speaker 1: fade away because you know or now I know what
37:53
Speaker 1: a mistake looks like, I know how it can go wrong.
37:55
Speaker 1: I know all the things that can go wrong and
37:57
Speaker 1: all of this, and I should know better, but I
37:58
Speaker 1: keep slipping up, and then that beginners like goes out
38:01
Speaker 1: the window and you start focusing on all this other
38:03
Speaker 1: shit that you've got to account for. Then that goes away.
38:06
Speaker 1: So how can you use this idea of beginner's luck
38:09
Speaker 1: into what you're doing to feel luckier when you're trying
38:13
Speaker 1: something new, when you're doing something not even new, when
38:15
Speaker 1: you're doing something for the tenth time and you want
38:17
Speaker 1: to have that feeling of the first time again. You
38:20
Speaker 1: want to look at it as a numbers game. If
38:22
Speaker 1: I look at it as well in general, sometimes it's
38:25
Speaker 1: going to hit. Sometimes it's absolutely not going to hit.
38:27
Speaker 1: Then I'm going to be a bit more relaxed because
38:29
Speaker 1: it's like, is this going to be a hit or
38:31
Speaker 1: is this going to be a miss. If I'm like,
38:32
Speaker 1: I fuck I'd have to get it right this time.
38:33
Speaker 1: I have to fucking get it right this time. I've
38:35
Speaker 1: got it wrong the last few times. If I've got
38:36
Speaker 1: to get it right this time, then I'm putting a
38:38
Speaker 1: lot of pressure on myself. And often when you're like
38:40
Speaker 1: I have to do something, you then even without realizing it,
38:43
Speaker 1: you're focusing more on the negative, or more on the
38:46
Speaker 1: fear of not getting it right or the fear of
38:48
Speaker 1: something not falling into place. More so then am I
38:51
Speaker 1: actually is this going to fall into place? Me? This
38:53
Speaker 1: is going to work. I'm more relaxed. I've got this
38:55
Speaker 1: nice relaxed energy. So think of that idea of beginners,
38:58
Speaker 1: Like the reason beginners do well is because the pressure
39:00
Speaker 1: is relatively low. A bit of pressure is good. And
39:04
Speaker 1: this is the last thing I want to touch on,
39:05
Speaker 1: this idea of pressure. A bit of pressure is good.
39:07
Speaker 1: But then where is that tipping point? A lot of
39:10
Speaker 1: people talk about the amygdala and anxiety and that nervous
39:13
Speaker 1: energy and that like adrenaline that we get before performing.
39:16
Speaker 1: As the analogy that they use is running away from
39:19
Speaker 1: a lion. You know, your brain's telling you you're running
39:21
Speaker 1: away from a line. It's fear and then it gives
39:23
Speaker 1: you all this thing and that lion analogy are kind
39:26
Speaker 1: of it's a bit outdated because like we've evolved a
39:29
Speaker 1: lot since then. We're not running away from lions left, right,
39:32
Speaker 1: and center. But the issue with this idea of how
39:35
Speaker 1: the AMYGD line your fear and how it helps you perform,
39:37
Speaker 1: there's like a it's a knife edge because if I'm
39:40
Speaker 1: going to get up on a stage to perform, I
39:42
Speaker 1: don't want to be too relaxed. I do need adrenaline.
39:44
Speaker 1: I do need that umph of like cortisol and adrenaline
39:48
Speaker 1: pumping through my body so I actually perform. I've got
39:50
Speaker 1: to be on I've got to be focused. If I'm
39:51
Speaker 1: way too relaxed, I might be distracted. So that level
39:55
Speaker 1: of nerves is good. It's that knife edge of like
39:58
Speaker 1: where I get to that point where I'm way too
40:00
Speaker 1: nervous that then I'm way too scattered. My adrenaline is
40:03
Speaker 1: just all over the place, and now it's become anxiety,
40:06
Speaker 1: and now I'm psyching myself out. If you do use
40:08
Speaker 1: that line analogy, you want enough of that energy, so
40:12
Speaker 1: you run away from the line. No one's talking about
40:15
Speaker 1: where the line's here, and then your brain's telling you
40:17
Speaker 1: you're not as fast as a line. You could never
40:18
Speaker 1: outround that line. You might as well not even bother.
40:20
Speaker 1: Don't even bother at running that line. That doesn't happen, right,
40:22
Speaker 1: that would never happen. When you're talking about evolutionary the
40:25
Speaker 1: evolution of the image to a learned humans and fear,
40:28
Speaker 1: So you've got to think, how am I finding that
40:31
Speaker 1: healthy level of quote unquote fear or the need to
40:34
Speaker 1: perform and evening that out with healthy expectations of my
40:38
Speaker 1: own behavior. Because when you're out running a line, you're
40:41
Speaker 1: not thinking a line is actually fast, I'm not even
40:43
Speaker 1: gonna bother. I'm just going to fail. You're thinking I've
40:46
Speaker 1: got to do my best. I'm just gonna put myself
40:47
Speaker 1: out there and do my best. So you want to
40:48
Speaker 1: look at that when you approach things, any task, when
40:51
Speaker 1: you're like, after you've gone through that beginn's luck when
40:53
Speaker 1: you're trying to approach something new, it's that healthy thing
40:56
Speaker 1: of I'm going to do my best. I'm going to
40:58
Speaker 1: perform how I can perfer, and it is going to
41:01
Speaker 1: be a numbers game at the end of the day.
41:02
Speaker 1: There's gonna be days where I slip up and things
41:04
Speaker 1: go wrong and it doesn't work out. And then other
41:06
Speaker 1: days where it's really gonna work out with anything that
41:08
Speaker 1: you do, even like relatively passive things like if I'm
41:12
Speaker 1: reading a book. There are some days where I'm on
41:13
Speaker 1: and I'm switched on and I'm so focused and I'm
41:16
Speaker 1: just churning through pages and it's all absorbed, all absorbed.
41:19
Speaker 1: And other days I'll read three pages and I'm like,
41:21
Speaker 1: I have no idea what I read. I was reading
41:23
Speaker 1: with my eyes and not my brain. Now I've got
41:24
Speaker 1: to go back three pages and read. So it could
41:26
Speaker 1: be any task. But if I was to read ten
41:28
Speaker 1: pages every day, it wouldn't matter. If I had one
41:31
Speaker 1: day of like not absorbing anything, I'll just go back
41:34
Speaker 1: and start again the next day. It's not a problem.
41:35
Speaker 1: So that's how you look at almost every task in life,
41:37
Speaker 1: and that's how you actually become a lot luckier. How
41:40
Speaker 1: you approach things, and how much anxiety or fear or
41:45
Speaker 1: like resistance towards that thing you give yourself. So, yes,
41:50
Speaker 1: that is pretty much the eight points. I'm going to
41:52
Speaker 1: quickly summarize them. Luck favors motion. The more you do,
41:55
Speaker 1: the more is going to come your way. Give your
41:57
Speaker 1: all to ever every interaction that you have. Talk more
42:00
Speaker 1: about your passions. Be passionate. Be a passionate person whenever possible.
42:05
Speaker 1: Number four be the luck in someone else's day. Number
42:07
Speaker 1: five expect good things that healthy optimism. Number six. If
42:12
Speaker 1: you knew that today was going to be a lucky day,
42:14
Speaker 1: how would you behave Differently if you knew, for a factor,
42:17
Speaker 1: you'd be a lucky day. Number seven you want to
42:19
Speaker 1: look at setbacks and failures differently. Have a more casual
42:22
Speaker 1: relationship with your failures. And Number eight. Knowing what you
42:26
Speaker 1: know about beginner's luck and that relaxed energy you bring
42:29
Speaker 1: to something, how can you apply that to other things
42:31
Speaker 1: that you've already started doing in your life. So that
42:35
Speaker 1: once you use all those eight points and apply them
42:38
Speaker 1: to your life, you will start to become a luckier person.
42:41
Speaker 1: Not in the sense of how people view like of oh,
42:43
Speaker 1: luck is an external thing that I've known control over,
42:45
Speaker 1: but more so I am a luckier person. Like the
42:49
Speaker 1: data showed, and how it makes you more likely to
42:51
Speaker 1: follow through with your goals, to plan things better, to
42:54
Speaker 1: be more confident. It's kind of like that Placebo effect
42:59
Speaker 1: where you're mind is framing it in such a way
43:01
Speaker 1: that it actually does change the outcome for you. Yes, anyway,
43:06
Speaker 1: on your merry way, go and be lucky today. Go
43:08
Speaker 1: and have a lucky weekend slash week. This is coming
43:11
Speaker 1: out on a Tuesday, so you go and have a
43:13
Speaker 1: lucky week anyway. That is all for today, Love you
43:15
Speaker 1: guys so much. As always, remember, be kind to yourself,
43:19
Speaker 1: be kind to your brain, don't take shit from anyone,
43:21
Speaker 1: and especially don't take shit from yourself. Dunk it.