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Voddie Baucham - Shepherds' Conference 2012 General Session 4 · Voddie Baucham Sermons

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Speaker 1: Open your Bibles if you have them with you to
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Speaker 1: Ephesians chapter 5. To Ephesians chapter 5. And I'll share
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Speaker 1: with you the message that Dr. MacArthur asked me to bring.
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Speaker 1: Talking about our leadership in our homes. This is a
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Speaker 1: seminal issue. You know, it's interesting. Several months ago, we
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Speaker 1: watched a tragedy unfold at Penn State University. Where an icon,
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Speaker 1: a hero, Joe Paterno... saw everything that he had worked
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Speaker 1: and lived for for more than four decades disintegrate right
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Speaker 1: before his eyes. And although, if you look at his
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Speaker 1: death certificate, it will say that he died of cancer,
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Speaker 1: I don't think anyone would argue that what happened to
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Speaker 1: him had nothing to do with it. The fact of
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Speaker 1: the matter is, it had to contribute to the abrupt
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Speaker 1: ending of the man's life. And what's astonishing about it
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Speaker 1: is how quickly it happened and how absolute the response was.
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Speaker 1: A man in his position should have known better, should
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Speaker 1: have done more, should have, just an absolute line in
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Speaker 1: the sand. You are disqualified. You lost this position. As
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Speaker 1: many would in our day and age. But how many
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Speaker 1: of us believe that had he been discovered to be
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Speaker 1: an adulterer or an abusive husband or a derelict father
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Speaker 1: or an absentee father or an abusive father, that Penn
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Speaker 1: State would have said, you're disqualified. In fact, there is
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Speaker 1: no profession in our culture wherein a man would be
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Speaker 1: disqualified because of his failures as a husband and a father.
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Speaker 1: Except one. And that's ours. Doctors, lawyers, coaches, judges. There's
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Speaker 1: a man running for president right now who's on his
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Speaker 1: third wife. And regardless of your politics, the point I'm
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Speaker 1: making is, It's not a disqualifier. But for us, it is.
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Speaker 1: We are held to a different standard. But the question is, why? Well,
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Speaker 1: before we get to that, here's what I've been pondering.
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Speaker 1: Not only are we unique in the fact that being
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Speaker 1: derelict in those responsibilities would be a disqualifier. And that
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Speaker 1: separates us from everyone else in our culture. Everyone else
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Speaker 1: in our culture. There's no one who's held to that standard.
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Speaker 1: But it's even more significant than that. Not only is
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Speaker 1: it a disqualifier if we live our lives in that way,
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Speaker 1: but biblically it is a qualifier for us to be
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Speaker 1: exemplary as husbands and as fathers. So not only on
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Speaker 1: the negative side can we not just fail miserably in
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Speaker 1: that area and expect to stay in the positions that
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Speaker 1: we have, but from a biblical perspective, in order to
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Speaker 1: enter into these positions that we have, according to Titus
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Speaker 1: chapter 1 and verse 6, and according to 1 Timothy
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Speaker 1: chapter 3 verses 4 and 5, we're qualified for our
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Speaker 1: positions in Based upon being exemplary husbands and exemplary fathers.
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Speaker 1: Can I say perfect? Absolutely not. You can't be an
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Speaker 1: example if you're a perfect husband. Pastor, can you just
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Speaker 1: help me? I'm struggling with what to do. I blew
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Speaker 1: it with my wife, and I want to make that right.
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Speaker 1: Can you help me with that? Wow, I really wish
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Speaker 1: I could, but I have no idea what that looks like. Pastor,
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Speaker 1: can you just pray for me? Because my son, I
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Speaker 1: don't think he's going to make it. Is it a
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Speaker 1: terminal illness? No, but I don't think he's going to
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Speaker 1: make it. I cannot comprehend being that angry with a child,
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Speaker 1: but I'll try to pray for you. Not perfect, but exemplary. Again,
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Speaker 1: the question is, why?
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Speaker 2: Why?
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Speaker 1: Does God just throw this standard out there? Absolutely not.
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Speaker 1: And I believe if we understand this picture here in
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Speaker 1: the book of Ephesians, we'll understand the significance of the
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Speaker 1: marriage relationship in general and the family in general, but
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Speaker 1: also why it is so significant for us. In order
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Speaker 1: to understand this, I want us to look briefly at
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Speaker 1: this letter more carefully. Because what I'm going to argue
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Speaker 1: here Is that the reason that this is so important
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Speaker 1: for us. Not only a disqualifier but a qualifier. Is
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Speaker 1: because of the gospel. Not because the family is so
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Speaker 1: important in and of itself. And the family is important
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Speaker 1: in and of itself. But the government is important too
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Speaker 1: in and of itself. But it's important because of the
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Speaker 1: gospel itself. This is about the gospel. This is one
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Speaker 1: of the many implications of the gospel. This is a
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Speaker 1: picture of the gospel. That is why this is a
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Speaker 1: non-negotiable for us. Not just because families are in trouble
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Speaker 1: in our day, and families are in trouble in our day,
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Speaker 1: but everybody's in trouble in our day. Families have always
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Speaker 1: been in trouble. I see so many dysfunctional families around me. Really,
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Speaker 1: you do? Because as far as my theology goes, there's
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Speaker 1: only been one non-dysfunctional family in the history of the world,
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Speaker 1: and they're the family that invented dysfunction. To understand Ephesians
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Speaker 1: chapter 5, we have to understand Ephesians. This book divided
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Speaker 1: perfectly in half. The first three chapters of The book
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Speaker 1: are about orthodoxy. The last three about orthopraxy. The first
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Speaker 1: three about right believing. The last three about right behaving.
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Speaker 1: The first three about our calling. The last three about
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Speaker 1: our conduct. The first three about the indicatives. And the
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Speaker 1: last three about the imperatives. And we must grasp that
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Speaker 1: if we're going to understand the book of Ephesians. We
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Speaker 1: have to understand the difference between the indicatives. The indicatives,
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Speaker 1: what Christ has accomplished on our behalf... To his father's
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Speaker 1: glory through the cross. That's what we find in the
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Speaker 1: first half of the book. What Christ has accomplished on
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Speaker 1: our behalf to the father's glory through the cross. Those
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Speaker 1: are the indicatives. That's who and what we are. In
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Speaker 1: the second half, we see the imperatives. And the imperatives
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Speaker 1: are how we are called and empowered and motivated to
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Speaker 1: live as a direct result of the person and work
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Speaker 1: of Christ. So on the one hand, we see who
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Speaker 1: we are. In the second half, we see who we're called, enabled, empowered,
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Speaker 1: and motivated to be. And if we just join these two,
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Speaker 1: what we end up doing is confusing what the gospel
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Speaker 1: requires and what the gospel produces. And that is no
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Speaker 1: gospel at all. You end up with works righteousness if
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Speaker 1: you do that. What the gospel requires is repentance and faith.
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Speaker 1: What the gospel produces is obedience. And so we have
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Speaker 1: to keep these things in view. We have to understand that. This,
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Speaker 1: if we want to understand marriage in the fifth chapter
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Speaker 1: here of this letter. Now, not only do we have
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Speaker 1: the indicatives in the first half and the imperatives in
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Speaker 1: the second half, but we have what I call this
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Speaker 1: sort of grand indicative at the beginning of the book.
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Speaker 1: Let me give this to you. And then we'll look
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Speaker 1: at the major overarching indicatives in the first three chapters.
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Speaker 1: That'll take us to Ephesians chapter 5, and we can
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Speaker 1: understand why marriage has the significance that it does. Chapter 1,
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Speaker 1: beginning of verse 1. Three, blessed be the God and
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Speaker 1: Father of our Lord Jesus Christ who has blessed us
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Speaker 1: in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places,
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Speaker 1: even as he chose us in him before the foundation
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Speaker 1: of the world. that we should be holy and blameless
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Speaker 1: before him. In love he predestined us for adoption as
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Speaker 1: sons through Jesus Christ according to the purpose of his will,
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Speaker 1: to the praise of his glorious grace with which he
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Speaker 1: blessed us in the beloved. In him we have redemption
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Speaker 1: through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses according to
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Speaker 1: the riches of his grace which he lavished upon us
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Speaker 1: in all wisdom and insight, making known to us the
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Speaker 1: mystery of his will according to the purpose of which
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Speaker 1: he set forth in Christ as a plan for the
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Speaker 1: fullness of time to unite all things in him, things
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Speaker 1: in heaven, things on earth. He blessed us. He chose us.
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Speaker 1: He predestined us. He blessed us. He lavished upon us.
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Speaker 1: He made known to us. What have you been told
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Speaker 1: to do? Absolutely nothing. What have you been told you
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Speaker 1: can do? Absolutely everything. But note these phrases. In Christ.
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Speaker 1: In the beloved. In him. Through Jesus Christ. in the beloved,
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Speaker 1: in him, through his blood, in Christ, in him.
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Speaker 2: What Christ has accomplished on our behalf to his Father's
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Speaker 2: glory through the cross.
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Speaker 1: That's the grand indicative here. But then at the end
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Speaker 1: of each chapter, Paul gives us these overarching indicatives, and
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Speaker 1: they're the key to understanding the book of Ephesians. Look
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Speaker 1: at the end of chapter 1 in verse 22. And
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Speaker 1: he put all things under his feet and gave him
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Speaker 1: as head over all things to the church, which is
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Speaker 1: his body, the fullness of him who fills all in all.
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Speaker 1: The first grand indicative as we come to the end
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Speaker 1: of this chapter is is Christ's headship over his body.
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Speaker 1: That's what this letter is about. It's about Christ's headship
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Speaker 1: over his body. There's a second grand indicative that comes
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Speaker 1: at the end of chapter two. Look beginning in verse 19.
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Speaker 1: So then you are no longer strangers and aliens, but
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Speaker 1: you are fellow citizens with the saints and members of
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Speaker 1: the household of God, built on the foundation of the
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Speaker 1: apostles and prophets, Christ Jesus himself being the cornerstone. In
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Speaker 1: whom the whole structure being joined together grows into a
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Speaker 1: holy temple in the Lord. In him you are being
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Speaker 1: built together into a dwelling place for God by the Spirit.
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Speaker 1: So the first overarching indicative is Christ's headship over his body.
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Speaker 1: The second one, we heard about this on yesterday, is
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Speaker 1: unity in Christ's body. By the way, notice that in
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Speaker 1: that unity he uses these structural illustrations and they all
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Speaker 1: go to the idea of a household. They go from
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Speaker 1: the idea of a household to the idea of a temple.
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Speaker 1: That's important. Hold on to that. The third and final
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Speaker 1: overarching indicative here is found at the end of chapter three.
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Speaker 1: That's where we find the crescendo. And we know that
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Speaker 1: we've reached a turning point because we have a doxology
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Speaker 1: here and an amen. So look at chapter three, beginning
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Speaker 1: of verse 20. Now to him who is able to
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Speaker 1: do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think,
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Speaker 1: according to the power at work within us, to him
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Speaker 1: be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout
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Speaker 1: all generations forever and ever. Amen. The third overarching indicative
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Speaker 1: is the glory that the body gives to its head.
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Speaker 1: You want to understand the book of Ephesians, grab these
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Speaker 1: three things. Christ's headship over his body. Unity in Christ's body.
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Speaker 1: and the glory that the body gives to its head.
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Speaker 1: You get to the second half of this letter, and
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Speaker 1: you hear these things and see these things again and
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Speaker 1: again and again. Those are the indicatives. Those are the
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Speaker 1: things that empower us, equip us, and motivate us to
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Speaker 1: do all that we are commanded to do in the
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Speaker 1: second half of the book. We have to have that
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Speaker 1: in order. Now come with me to Ephesians chapter 5,
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Speaker 1: and let's begin at verse 22. Wives, submit to your
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Speaker 1: own husbands as to the Lord.
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Speaker 2: Why?
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Speaker 1: For the husband is the head of the wife, even
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Speaker 1: as Christ is the head of the church, his body,
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Speaker 1: and is himself its savior. Now as the church submits
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Speaker 1: to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to
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Speaker 1: their husbands. Does this have anything to do with the
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Speaker 1: superiority of men over women? Absolutely not. This has everything
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Speaker 1: to do with Christ's headship over his body. Why is
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Speaker 1: this significant? It's significant because in the first half, in
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Speaker 1: the indicatives, one of the grand overarching indicatives of the
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Speaker 1: entire book is Christ's headship over his body. We see
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Speaker 1: later on in chapter 5 that marriage is a living,
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Speaker 1: breathing picture, an illustration, if you will, of the relationship
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Speaker 1: between Christ and his church. If this picture is going
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Speaker 1: to be an accurate one and not a blasphemous one,
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Speaker 1: then just as the church submits to Christ... The wife
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Speaker 1: must submit to her husband. Not because of social roles, norms,
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Speaker 1: and mores. Not even because of the success of society.
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Speaker 1: But because of the gospel. That's why it's significant. Now
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Speaker 1: we get to the husband's part. And here's where we're
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Speaker 1: going to hang out for a minute. Husbands, love your wives.
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Speaker 1: Now he could stop there. But he doesn't. And by
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Speaker 1: the way, there's an imperative if I ever saw one. Husbands,
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Speaker 1: love your wives. How do you get away from that one? Husbands,
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Speaker 1: love your wives. I don't want to. Yeah, but he
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Speaker 1: commanded you to. You have to love her. She's your wife.
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Speaker 1: You don't understand how bad it is, man. I don't
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Speaker 1: even see her as my wife anymore. Well, that's fine.
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Speaker 1: Love your neighbor as yourself. She's your closest neighbor. She's
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Speaker 1: right there beside you in the bed. You don't get
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Speaker 1: more neighborly than that, all right? Brother, we don't even
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Speaker 1: sleep together anymore. I sleep on the couch. Oh, well,
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Speaker 1: that's cool because she's your sister in Christ. By this,
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Speaker 1: all men will know that you're my disciples, that you
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Speaker 1: have love one for another.
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Speaker 2: All right.
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Speaker 1: I don't even know if I'm still a Christian. Okay,
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Speaker 1: I'm a Christian, but I don't think she's a Christian.
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Speaker 1: That's fine. Love your enemies. And that would be enough,
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Speaker 1: would it not? But I want you to grasp this. Husbands,
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Speaker 1: love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave
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Speaker 1: himself up for her. Now watch what happens. And I
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Speaker 1: don't think we have to force this. That he might
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Speaker 1: sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of the
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Speaker 1: water of the word. What does it mean to sanctify her?
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Speaker 1: It means to set her apart as his own. That
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Speaker 1: sounds like Christ's headship over his church. Keep reading. So
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Speaker 1: that he might present the church to himself. that he
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Speaker 1: might present the church to himself. Well, that sounds like
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Speaker 1: it might be shadows of the unity that we read
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Speaker 1: about earlier. And then, in splendor, without spot or wrinkle
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Speaker 1: or any such thing, that she might be holy and
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Speaker 1: without blemish, which would bring glory to her head. Love
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Speaker 1: your wife, not just because he told you to, but
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Speaker 1: love your wife because this is about Christ. What do
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Speaker 1: you mean this is about Christ? Listen to the picture
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Speaker 1: that was just painted. Your wife is a member of
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Speaker 1: the body of Christ. She belongs to Christ. You love
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Speaker 1: Christ with every fiber of your being. God has given
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Speaker 1: your wife to you that you might be a sanctifying
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Speaker 1: influence in her life so that she is more like
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Speaker 1: Christ and brings more glory to Christ as a result
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Speaker 1: of having been married to you than she would have
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Speaker 1: had she not. That's why you do it. It's about
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Speaker 1: the gospel. She belongs to him. You love him. God
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Speaker 1: gave her to you. And God is using you as
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Speaker 1: a sanctifying influence in her life. Sometimes just by how
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Speaker 1: hard it is to live with you. If you can't
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Speaker 1: say amen, you ought to say ouch. But man, does
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Speaker 1: that not change your perspective?
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Speaker 3: Yes.
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Speaker 1: God is not saying, you know, reach way down deep
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Speaker 1: and try to find some overflowing emotion toward your wife.
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Speaker 1: That's not what he's saying. We should be emotional toward
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Speaker 1: our wives, but that's not what he's saying. This is
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Speaker 1: about Christ. This is an adopted daughter of the King
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Speaker 1: of Kings and the Lord of Lords. You have been
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Speaker 1: united with her in a covenant relationship through which God
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Speaker 1: has designed to sanctify her. That's just the whole of
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Speaker 1: her sanctification. No, absolutely not. It's not the whole of
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Speaker 1: her sanctification. But you are to be that kind of
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Speaker 1: influence in her life. And because you understand Christ's headship
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Speaker 1: over his body, the unity in Christ's body and the
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Speaker 1: glory that the body gives to its head, What you
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Speaker 1: do is not turn to your wife in hopes that
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Speaker 1: you can receive from her some motivation to love her.
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Speaker 1: But turn to the Lord. See, this is not about
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Speaker 1: me loving my wife so that she can in turn
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Speaker 1: give me what I want. That's selfish. I'm loving you, baby.
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Speaker 1: I'm loving you because, well, really, I'm loving you because
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Speaker 1: I want you to give me what I want. But
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Speaker 1: I'm loving you. That's idolatry. Pure and simple. Here's the
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Speaker 1: other thing. That won't last forever. I'm loving my wife
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Speaker 1: so that she can satisfy me. First of all, that's
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Speaker 1: idolatry because she was never meant to be my satisfaction.
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Speaker 1: Christ is. But secondly, she's a frail, fragile, flawed human being.
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Speaker 1: And I'm going to be dissatisfied with her. So if
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Speaker 1: my only reason for loving her is to increase my
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Speaker 1: level of satisfaction because of how she responds, eventually I
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Speaker 1: will be frustrated with that and I'll come to an
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Speaker 1: end eventually. But if I view her as a child
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Speaker 1: of the king.
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Speaker 3: Who's been entrusted to me and my desire is that
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Speaker 3: my love that overflows to her would be a sanctifying
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Speaker 3: influence in her life for the love of Christ who
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Speaker 3: loved me, I don't stop that.
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Speaker 1: If it is about Christ, you endure for Christ's sake.
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Speaker 1: Sounds really selfless, but he doesn't leave us there. In
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Speaker 1: the same way, this is good. Husbands should love their
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Speaker 1: wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife
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Speaker 1: loves himself, for no one ever hated his own flesh,
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Speaker 1: but nourishes and cherishes it. Just as Christ does the
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Speaker 1: church because we are members of his body. First of all,
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Speaker 1: I love my wife with this kind of love because
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Speaker 1: she's a member of Christ's body. But secondly, not only
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Speaker 1: is she a member of his body, she's a member
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Speaker 1: of mine. She's not just mine, she's me. Here's the picture. Lord,
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Speaker 1: you saved me. You redeemed me. You sustained me. I
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Speaker 1: love you. I'm grateful to you. You gave me this woman. Amen.
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Speaker 1: And a stewardship in her life. My desire is to
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Speaker 1: love her in a way that draws her closer to you.
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Speaker 1: Here she is, Lord. Here she is. Be satisfied. And
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Speaker 1: he looks to you and says, enjoy. I'm giving her
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Speaker 1: to you, Jesus. Yes.
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Speaker 3: Enjoy. Enjoy.
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Speaker 1: She is bone of your bone, flesh of your flesh.
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Speaker 1: Delight in the wife of your youth. Drink deeply from
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Speaker 1: your own cistern. Enjoy. As a gift from Christ himself.
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Speaker 1: Now look at the last part of this. Therefore, a
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Speaker 1: man shall leave his father and mother, hold fast to
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Speaker 1: his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This
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Speaker 1: mystery is profound, and I'm saying that it refers to
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Speaker 1: Christ and the church. However, let each one of you
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Speaker 1: love his wife as himself, and let the wife see
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Speaker 1: to it that she respects her husband. Now there's this
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Speaker 1: picture of the one flesh union. There's this sanctifying love.
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Speaker 1: There's this love that God uses in the life of
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Speaker 1: a wife. It's mysterious here. Paul says it. It's mysterious.
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Speaker 1: I don't understand it. She's more like him. Who do
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Speaker 1: I love more than anything else in the world?
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Speaker 2: Christ.
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Speaker 1: She becomes more radiant and more like the one whom
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Speaker 1: I love more than anything else in the world. And
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Speaker 1: he says to me, enjoy. Now there's this picture of
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Speaker 1: this one flesh union. This sexual relationship between a man
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Speaker 1: and his wife. And I know there's a lot of
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Speaker 1: talk going on about, you know, books out there being
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Speaker 1: written about sex and so on and so forth. And
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Speaker 1: the language that you use and what you talk about,
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Speaker 1: what you don't talk about. Let me give you this picture.
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Speaker 1: Because I don't think we think enough of sex. I
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Speaker 1: didn't say I don't think we think of sex enough.
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Speaker 1: That's not our problem. But we don't think enough of sex.
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Speaker 1: Marriage is this living, breathing picture of the relationship between
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Speaker 1: Christ and his church. Do you know that the church
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Speaker 1: is anxiously anticipating the return of her Savior? You know
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Speaker 1: that the church is anxiously groaning and anticipating the consummation
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Speaker 1: of all things, the wedding feast of the Lamb, the
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Speaker 1: union with the one who saved us. We are anxiously
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Speaker 1: anticipating that. We say, come Lord Jesus. Newsflash, the sexual
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Speaker 1: union between a man and his wife is a living thing. breathing,
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Speaker 1: awe-inspiring expression of the ecstasy of the union that the
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Speaker 1: church awaits. You don't think highly enough of sex. You
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Speaker 1: don't respect it enough. You don't honor it enough. There
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Speaker 1: is a beauty and a glory here that we have
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Speaker 1: simply missed. Now you run and tell that to your kids.
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Speaker 1: Don't do that. Don't do that. Really, how come you
25:45
Speaker 1: don't want me to do that? Because obviously, you know,
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Speaker 1: you did that. That's how we got here. So how
25:52
Speaker 1: come you don't want me to do that? Well, just
25:53
Speaker 1: don't do that because it's bad. It's bad, but I
25:56
Speaker 1: thought it was, I mean, that's how we got here.
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Speaker 1: But just know because it's bad. It'll be good. But
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Speaker 1: right now it's just bad. no listen to me son
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Speaker 1: it is glorious and it is a glorious manifestation of
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Speaker 1: the ecstasy which the church awaits as her head and
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Speaker 1: her groom returns for her don't you dare make less
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Speaker 1: of it than that I don't want you to be
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Speaker 1: afraid of it I don't want you to look down
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Speaker 1: on it don't you dare look down on it it's
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Speaker 1: awesome We overuse that word awesome. And most of the
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Speaker 1: stuff that we say is awesome is not. Son, this
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Speaker 1: is awesome. I ain't lying, man.
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Speaker 3: It is.
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Speaker 1: But it's awesome because of this picture of Christ and
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Speaker 1: his bride, the church. And you should no more illegitimately
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Speaker 1: unite yourself physically with a woman outside of marriage than
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Speaker 1: Christ should unite himself with one who is not his own.
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Speaker 1: Different answer. Last part of this. I have a couple
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Speaker 1: minutes left. Listen, it's chapter 6. Now, flowing from that, children,
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Speaker 1: obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.
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Speaker 1: We're not just talking about marriage, but we're also talking
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Speaker 1: about family and raising our children. Remember those qualifications that
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Speaker 1: we have in Titus 1, 6 have to do with
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Speaker 1: our children. In 1 Timothy chapter 3, verses 4 and 5,
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Speaker 1: has to do with our governance of our home. Children,
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Speaker 1: obey your parents and the Lord for this is right.
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Speaker 1: Honor your father and mother. This is the first commandment
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Speaker 1: with a promise. It's the only one with a promise.
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Speaker 1: That it may go well with you and that you
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Speaker 1: may live long in the land. Fathers, do not provoke
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Speaker 1: your children to anger, but bring them up in the
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Speaker 1: discipline and instruction of the Lord. It flows naturally from
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Speaker 1: the marriage relationship and the one flesh union. What is
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Speaker 1: produced by the marriage relationship and the one flesh union?
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Speaker 1: What is produced by it is offspring. There's the picture.
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Speaker 1: You go to Genesis chapter 2 and verse 18 and
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Speaker 1: all of a sudden you've seen this pattern for six
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Speaker 1: days of creation. Let there be than there was, it
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Speaker 1: was good. Let there be than there was, it was good.
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Speaker 1: Let there be than there was, it was good. Let
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Speaker 1: there be than there was, it was good. You get
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Speaker 1: used to that and you just kind of get into
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Speaker 1: the rhythm of it. Now you get in chapter 2
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Speaker 1: and verse 18 and for the first time God says
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Speaker 1: something is not good. What's not good? Not good for
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Speaker 1: the man to be alone. Really?
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Speaker 3: Really?
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Speaker 1: Does that mean that every man has to be married? No.
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Speaker 1: It can't mean that. We know from 1 Corinthians chapter
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Speaker 1: 7 and Matthew chapter 19 that it cannot mean that
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Speaker 1: every man has to be married. What does it mean?
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Speaker 1: That the triune God of the universe, the importance of
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Speaker 1: the Trinity here. Makes man in his image and then
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Speaker 1: says it's not good for the man to be alone.
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Speaker 1: The God of the universe, the one true and living
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Speaker 1: God who has existed eternally in three persons. The son
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Speaker 1: eternally begotten of the father and the spirit eternally proceeding
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Speaker 1: from the father and the son. Makes man in his
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Speaker 1: image and says that's not good. Then from the man
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Speaker 1: he makes a woman and from their union they produce offspring.
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Speaker 1: Every time I talk about this, guys will go, well,
29:29
Speaker 1: wait a minute. Well, then the single guy, a single
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Speaker 1: guy doesn't have that picture. Yeah, absolutely he does. Yeah,
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Speaker 1: but he doesn't have a wife and children. Yeah, but
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Speaker 1: he is a child from a one flesh union. Every
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Speaker 1: human being reflects that triunity in God. And the offspring
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Speaker 1: from our union reflects that. But more importantly than that,
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Speaker 1: God sends to our home souls who do not know him.
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Speaker 1: We say that God's called us to the gospel ministry
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Speaker 1: so that we can preach the gospel to every creature.
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Speaker 1: And God sends us souls in our home every day.
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Speaker 1: Not every day. Every day. That's beyond every day. who
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Speaker 1: do not know him, listen to me. A man who
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Speaker 1: does not take great care to nurture, evangelize, and disciple
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Speaker 1: the children in his home has no business in pastoral ministry.
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Speaker 1: He ought to be kept up at night over lost kids.
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Speaker 1: Burdened Over children who do not yet know him. Crying
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Speaker 1: out to God on their behalf, what should weigh on
31:11
Speaker 1: you more than this? And yet, here's the irony. This
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Speaker 1: is supposed to be the only place where failure in
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Speaker 1: this area disqualifies you. And being exemplary in this area
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Speaker 1: qualifies you. overwhelming majority of churches that I'm aware of
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Speaker 1: don't even ask a man about his marriage and his
31:39
Speaker 1: discipleship of his children. We don't care. Do you know
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Speaker 1: what's wrong with that? Here's what's wrong with that. This
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Speaker 1: is about the gospel. This is about the Christ whom
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Speaker 1: we say we love and we serve. And Christ, who
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Speaker 1: loves his church, says through his apostles, when you consider
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Speaker 1: a man, look at how he shepherds his wife. Look
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Speaker 1: at how he shepherds his children. Because if he's failing there,
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Speaker 1: he's already told you he can't do this job. But
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Speaker 1: what do we say? What does credentials look like? What
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Speaker 1: does he sound like as a public speaker? Give us
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Speaker 1: more men who are passionate for the souls of their
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Speaker 1: children and passionate about the picture of the gospel that's
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Speaker 1: being painted in their relationship with their wife. Give us
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Speaker 1: more men like that. Folks, we got enough seminary men.
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Speaker 1: I stand before you as a seminary man who had
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Speaker 1: more degrees than a thermometer. But you and I both
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Speaker 1: know that the world is filled with seminary men who
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Speaker 1: shouldn't be allowed close to a pulpit. But this is
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Speaker 1: the picture. This is significant. And it's significant because of
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Speaker 1: Christ's headship over his body that is pictured in the
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Speaker 1: relationship between a husband and his wife as a wife
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Speaker 1: lovingly submits to her husband as unto the Lord. It's
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Speaker 1: a picture of the unity in Christ's body as husband
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Speaker 1: and wife in spite of their sinfulness. Strive because of
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Speaker 1: what Christ has accomplished on their behalf to the Father's glory. Strive,
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Speaker 1: motivated by that and empowered by that to live with
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Speaker 1: one another in that one flesh union in a God-honoring way.
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Speaker 1: And as God blesses them with children and they strive
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Speaker 1: to present the gospel to them consistently and passionately with
34:17
Speaker 1: a view towards seeing them come to faith in Christ
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Speaker 1: that we might also say with our children here. Because
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Speaker 1: I love you more than anything in the world. You
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Speaker 1: gave them to me and I love them and I
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Speaker 1: want them to be yours. This is not about the
34:39
Speaker 1: culture having better marriages. Though I'm all for that. This
34:49
Speaker 1: is not about the world thinking better of us. Though
34:54
Speaker 1: I'm all for that. This is about the gospel. Here's
34:59
Speaker 1: why this is important. And I'll close with this. Oftentimes
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Speaker 1: when I talk about these issues of marriage and family,
35:08
Speaker 1: what I hear from men consistently is this. But you
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Speaker 1: don't know how bad it is out there. And men
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Speaker 1: have not seen examples. Therefore, they do not know how
35:22
Speaker 1: to be husbands and fathers. I don't do real well
35:28
Speaker 1: with that. I mean, really, I just don't. I don't
35:32
Speaker 1: do real well with that. I'll just be honest with you.
35:34
Speaker 1: I don't do real well with that. Pray for me.
35:36
Speaker 1: Because I don't. I don't do real well with that.
35:40
Speaker 1: For a couple of reasons. One, because I was raised
35:43
Speaker 1: not far from here in drug-infested, gang-infested, South Central Los Angeles, California,
35:49
Speaker 1: raised by a single teenage Buddhist mother. Never heard the
35:53
Speaker 1: gospel until my first year in college. My wife and I,
35:58
Speaker 1: who've been married for 23 years, On both sides of
36:01
Speaker 1: our family combined, there have been 25 marriages in the
36:05
Speaker 1: last two generations, 25 marriages and 22 divorces. I have
36:11
Speaker 1: 26 first cousins. There are two besides me currently married
36:15
Speaker 1: to and living with a spouse. My paternal grandmother and
36:18
Speaker 1: grandfather lived next door to each other, had three children,
36:23
Speaker 1: and were not married one day. That cannot be an
36:33
Speaker 1: excuse for me to fail as a father. Here's the
36:37
Speaker 1: second reason. I am a born again, blood washed follower
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Speaker 1: of the Lord Jesus Christ who has given me the
36:50
Speaker 1: only perfect picture that any man has ever seen or
36:56
Speaker 1: ever needs to see. I do not need an imperfect
37:00
Speaker 1: human man to show me what it means to be
37:04
Speaker 1: a father because I have the perfect God man who
37:07
Speaker 1: not only shows me that, but lives inside of me
37:13
Speaker 1: and empowers me to be what he's called me to be.
37:18
Speaker 1: Am I that perfectly? No, I'm not that perfectly. Better
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Speaker 1: today than yesterday. And better tomorrow than today, not because
37:28
Speaker 1: of pulling myself up by my own bootstraps, but because
37:32
Speaker 1: I am kept and sustained by Christ. I keep my
37:38
Speaker 1: face before him. And as his glorious radiance shines upon me,
37:45
Speaker 1: I see what it means to be a man, to
37:49
Speaker 1: be a husband, and to be a father. I recognize
37:53
Speaker 1: that I cannot do this in and of myself. but
37:58
Speaker 1: in Christ, in him, through him, by his blood, in him.
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Speaker 1: There's nothing that he calls me to for which he
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Speaker 1: will not equip me and through which he will not
38:19
Speaker 1: see me. But God is able.