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Style As Your Voice · Divas That Care Network

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_01: It's Divas that Care Radio.
• 0:02
  SPEAKER_01: Stories, strategies, and ideas to inspire positive change.
• 0:06
  SPEAKER_01: Welcome to Divas That Care, a network of women committed to making our world a better place for everyone.
• 0:13
  SPEAKER_01: This is a global movement for women, by women engaged in a collaborative effort to create a better world for future generations.
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_01: To find out more about the movement, visit divasletcare.com after the show.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_01: Right now, though, stay tuned for another jolt of inspiration.
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_02: Welcome to Confidence in Bloom, where we explore the moments, mindsets, and conversations that help women reconnect with who they truly are and step into the life with greater confidence.
• 0:42
  SPEAKER_02: This season is all about speak up and stand firm, finding your voice, setting healthy boundaries, and having the courage to show up as your authentic self, even when it feels uncomfortable.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_02: Today I'm joined with Sandy Okamoto, owner and founder of Style Options.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_02: For more than 25 years, Sandy has helped women and men discover their signature style, understanding that people often form impressions within the first few seconds of meeting us.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_02: But what makes Sandy's work so meaningful isn't just clothing or color.
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_02: It's the confidence that comes from aligning your outward appearance with who you are on the inside.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_02: Today we'll explore how style can become a powerful voice, how confidence grows from authenticity, and why standing firm often begins long before we even say a word.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_02: Welcome, Sandy.
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_02: I'm so happy to have you here.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_02: Hi, Tina.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you so much for having me.
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, we're gonna talk about um a little bit about your styling.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_02: Um, you know, and we're gonna talk a lot about mainly confidence, right?
• 1:49
  SPEAKER_02: So um you know, you know we work with men and women, so you know that what we wear has a lot to do with how we're feeling.
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, definitely it does.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_02: Now, so everyone, you know, talks about finding their voice.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_02: And sometimes we speak long before words are even exchanged, right?
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_02: You know this, right?
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_02: You're kind of a master in body language.
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_02: Uh tell me, was there a moment in your own life where changing how you presented yourself changed how you felt about yourself?
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, yes, definitely.
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, once I discovered the best colors for me and the best styles, uh, it really changed the way I felt about myself, first of all.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_00: And it made me feel good and and look better.
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_00: And so, in in return, people um respond to you differently.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_00: When you look, you feel confident, you exude, you know, a different um aura about you.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_00: So people respond to you differently.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_00: So, you know, it made a huge difference in my life when I when I discovered how to present my best self, right?
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_02: And and you've been working with people now in in this styling for over 25 years, am I right?
• 3:10
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, that's right.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, so maybe you could share a story of someone um who came to you thinking they just needed a wardrobe makeover and then discovered that what they really needed was, you know, the next level of confidence or even courage.
• 3:27
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I I have a a lot of clients that come to me, you know, just not knowing what to do because there's so much out there in in the uh in the media and in the department stores, you know, and online of what you should be wearing.
• 3:44
  SPEAKER_00: But you know, most people don't know um, first of all, their how to express themselves in their in their clothing.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_00: You know, you need to express yourself with your personality in your clothing, otherwise we would all look like, you know, the same thing.
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_00: We'd all be cookie cutter, right?
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_00: We don't want to look that way.
• 4:05
  SPEAKER_00: So I think once you know your best colors and your best styles for your body, the third most important thing, which really helped me, was knowing how to express your personality through your dress.
• 4:18
  SPEAKER_00: Because that's when you really come across confident, because you feel comfortable in your clothes, right?
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_02: And so I I I often wonder what that means, right?
• 4:29
  SPEAKER_02: Like express your personality, right?
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_02: Like, how would you explain like what that means?
• 4:35
  SPEAKER_02: Because I know there's lots of women that wear really bold, bright colors, right?
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_02: You know, and when they speak, I mean they they have a loud voice, they have, you know, is that the kind of personality that you mean, or do you mean like, you know, someone who's really timid and shy, you know, should avoid big bold colors?
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_00: So if you're timid and shy, you know, you're not gonna feel comfortable in big bold prints.
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_00: So there's actually six different kinds of uh we have categories of personality expressions.
• 5:08
  SPEAKER_00: There's dramatic, town and country, classic, romantic, natural, and delicate.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_00: So each one of those has a different personality.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_00: And you could be a combination of two or three, you know, because I consider myself dramatic because I am so petite that if I dressed very um demurely, that nobody would notice me.
• 5:33
  SPEAKER_00: In fact, that's how I used to dress, because I thought since I was petite that I couldn't wear bold prints, I couldn't wear bold colors.
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_00: But, you know, uh one of my mentors told me, you know, she said, no, you are dramatic.
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_00: She said, you should you shouldn't be wearing those tiny prints.
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_00: And once I changed my um my wardrobe to be more what I felt comfortable in, it it changed my whole feeling about myself.
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_00: And I felt more confident, you know.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_00: So it doesn't, it's just what you feel comfortable in.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_00: So some people like more tailored things.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_00: That's what we call a classic.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_00: Some people like more um more outdoorsy, more texture in their clothing.
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_00: And more the more texture you have, the more um friendly it is, uh, approachable.
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_00: So if you're in so if you're in a profession where you're dealing with uh helping people, like a counselor or um a teacher, then texture is is really important because you want people to feel to uh approach you to come to you.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_00: Wow, yeah, wow.
• 6:46
  SPEAKER_02: I love I love that.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_02: And so, okay, so let me ask you this, and you might um well, I know you'll have a comment because everybody does.
• 6:53
  SPEAKER_02: So when I was growing up, and we're going back to the 80s, right?
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_02: It was a big thing, like if you were, you know, plus size, of course, they didn't call us plus size then, they just called us overweight, right?
• 7:05
  SPEAKER_02: But if you, you know, I was always told wear black, you know, solid black that'll make you look slimmer.
• 7:11
  SPEAKER_02: Now, you know, I in the 80s I was a teenager, right?
• 7:15
  SPEAKER_02: And black was just not my color.
• 7:17
  SPEAKER_02: I was never my color.
• 7:18
  SPEAKER_02: I still don't really like the color black.
• 7:20
  SPEAKER_02: I do have it, it's not that I don't wear it, but it's not my favorite, you know.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_02: But I, you know, people would say to me I'd wear it, and they'd be like, it just doesn't suit you, right?
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_02: And I was always a big girl, so it's I was always, you know, hiding that I was a big girl, right?
• 7:35
  SPEAKER_02: And then, you know, of course, when I became, I don't know, early 20s, I remember thinking, what does it matter what I'm wearing?
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_02: Like I don't like the black dress, I don't want the black dress, I want to wear colors, right?
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_02: I've always liked colors, not necessarily big, bold patterns, but definitely colors, right?
• 7:54
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I think a lot of my clients they do uh default to wearing black all the time because you know they think if one, it makes you look slimmer, two, it's easy to to mix and match because black goes with everything.
• 8:10
  SPEAKER_00: But wearing black, like you said, is not for everyone, it doesn't enhance everyone's coloring, and there's more to life than just wearing black.
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, you know, there's so many different colors out there that uh, you know, just wearing black is is very boring for one thing, and it's not it's not for everyone, right?
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_02: And I think if you're dressing for your personality, no matter what your size is, and you can you can you know probably confirm this with me doesn't matter what your size is, if you're matching your personality and you know the kind of person that you are, it doesn't matter what you're wearing, it's gonna suit you, right?
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_00: Right because you're gonna feel comfortable in it, right?
• 8:53
  SPEAKER_02: And you're not gonna, you know, you as the person talking to me, if I'm dressed the way I dress for my body, you're not even like you're gonna notice that I'm a big person.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_02: I'm a big person, I take up a lot of space, right?
• 9:05
  SPEAKER_02: But you you don't look at the the size of me because it's all kind of one package now, yes, yes, yeah, yeah.
• 9:13
  SPEAKER_02: I love that.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_02: I love that.
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_02: And yeah, I didn't know really the words to explain that when I was young, right?
• 9:20
  SPEAKER_02: Today I don't care.
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_02: Today, you judge me, you do whatever you gotta do, but I'm gonna dress with what I feel comfortable with.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_02: Good for me.
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, many women spend years trying to fit into these expectations, right?
• 9:33
  SPEAKER_02: Of you know, of and instead of expressing who they truly are, right?
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_02: They they think they have to live in this, you know, what everybody else wants from them.
• 9:45
  SPEAKER_03: So why do you think that is?
• 9:47
  SPEAKER_02: Like, why do why do we do this?
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_02: Is the number is the first part of the question.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_02: And I the second question part is like, how can your personal style really express and become the way of saying this is who I am?
• 10:03
  SPEAKER_00: Well, like I said earlier, I used to think that since I was petite, that it was expected of me to wear, you know, tiny prints and you know not stand out.
• 10:14
  SPEAKER_00: And and you know, I come from an Asian uh heritage, so it, you know, it was very challenging for me to express myself because we don't express ourselves very openly.
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but I've learned to express myself more uh as I've grown older.
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_00: So yeah, it's you know, I don't think you should um dress according to expectations of other people, you know, or the media or whatever.
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_00: It's it's what you feel comfortable in because that's when you're gonna come across the most impactful when you feel comfortable.
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_00: You're gonna answer that's other false.
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that totally makes sense.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_02: So now this season, stand up and stand, no, speak up and stand firm, is about boundaries as well as voice.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_02: Have you seen women use style almost like a healthy boundary, like communicating confidence, professionalism, or maybe even self-respect without even having to explain themselves?
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, yes.
• 11:20
  SPEAKER_00: I think clothing really speaks a lot for your for your self-confidence, you know.
• 11:27
  SPEAKER_00: And like like you said earlier, it speaks before you verbally speak.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_00: You know, it takes only seven seconds for people to make a decision about you when they first meet you.
• 11:39
  SPEAKER_00: So they they you know have sized you up for your credibility, your professionalism, your trustworthiness.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_00: So what you wear is really important because you know, people see you first before you speak.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_00: So important.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and I we've all been in the room where someone walks in and just by seeing the way they walk, what they're wearing, and how they look, we look at them and go, oh my god, I want to know her or I want to know him, right?
• 12:08
  SPEAKER_02: I've done that so many times.
• 12:10
  SPEAKER_02: And I've had people come to me, right, saying, Oh my god, you when as soon as you walked in, I knew I had to come over and say hi-bye.
• 12:17
  SPEAKER_02: And I don't even know how to react to that, right?
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_02: Because I'm like me of all people, like, you know, I don't really think that I'm, you know, expanding on that, like the you know, letting out that energy of, you know, I'm I'm approachable or whatever.
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, I am, I like to think that I am, but I don't think about it when I walk into a room.
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_02: I just try to walk in, you know, confidently.
• 12:39
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_00: We have a bubbly personality, so people are very attracted to that, you know.
• 12:44
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I guess, you know, but when you when you when you walk like when I walk into a room, you may not necessarily know that if I'm just walking in, right?
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_02: Depending on talking or giggling, because you'll often hear me giggling at something.
• 12:56
  SPEAKER_02: This is what I do, right?
• 12:58
  SPEAKER_02: So yeah, I love that.
• 12:59
  SPEAKER_02: I love that, you know, our clothes say so much about our like who we are and what we believe in, right?
• 13:06
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, like I said earlier too, that if you if you're wearing clothes that make you feel comfortable, then that's gonna, you know, show before you can speak.
• 13:18
  SPEAKER_00: So people are gonna be attracted to that, right?
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_02: Of course, of course.
• 13:21
  SPEAKER_02: And I guess it just and the more you like I think if you're often in clothes that you wear, you don't even think about that anymore, right?
• 13:30
  SPEAKER_02: When you choose your own clothes, you know, when you're choosing your wardrobe, you're buying the clothes that you feel the best in.
• 13:37
  SPEAKER_02: And if you're wearing them, because we all have those clothes that we don't wear, right?
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_02: But if we're wearing the clothes that we feel our best in, people get to know us a lot easier that way, yes, yeah, and everyone has a certain style.
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_00: You know, have you ever gone shopping and you see something you go, oh, this looks like something oh I just feel what like all the time.
• 13:58
  SPEAKER_02: I do that all the time.
• 14:00
  SPEAKER_02: And when you see that person dressed in something that you're not used to seeing them, and it takes you like a few minutes to like, wow, that's not something I would have expected you to wear.
• 14:10
  SPEAKER_02: And often, you know, often you start talking to them, and you can tell just by the way they're talking and the way they're holding their bodies that they're just not in their comfort zone, right?
• 14:21
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, sometimes we buy things that you know may have looked good on someone else or it looked good on the mannequin in the store.
• 14:29
  SPEAKER_00: So we buy it, take it home, and it just you don't feel comfortable.
• 14:34
  SPEAKER_00: So it hangs in your closet with the price tag still on it, right?
• 14:38
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I have so many of those, so many of those, but you know, but it's I have a few of those too, so don't feel bad.
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_02: Well, and it's because I mean, you know, we all have that person that we see that always looks so nice, no matter what they're wearing, right?
• 14:51
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 14:52
  SPEAKER_02: And so then, you know, we get that idea.
• 14:54
  SPEAKER_02: Well, I'm gonna go, I'm gonna buy something similar to that, right?
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_02: And so we go, we buy something that's similar, and then we get at home and we're like, why'd I buy this?
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, soon, right?
• 15:03
  SPEAKER_02: And so then we avoid wearing it because we don't feel right in it.
• 15:07
  SPEAKER_02: Yes, yes, then two years later you're like, oh look, I still have the price take.
• 15:12
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I know, I know, I've done that too.
• 15:15
  SPEAKER_02: I think I think the majority of women are like that, unfortunately.
• 15:19
  SPEAKER_02: Now for someone who's listening, for someone who's listening today, Sandy, who might feel invisible or maybe lacking in confidence, confidence, or maybe she's afraid of being being judged, what's one small step that could take this week to begin showing up more authentically?
• 15:42
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I think you know, that person needs to be true to themselves.
• 15:47
  SPEAKER_00: You know, I think if they're trying to please other people or um feel that they're not worthy of, you know, feeling good about themselves, I think they should um they should listen to their own body and feel and and you know, answer that call that they need more, that they want to improve themselves, you know, to to show up better and to feel more confident.
• 16:15
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 16:16
  SPEAKER_00: And it's okay if you're afraid, you know, there are people to help you along the way.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_00: You know, it's we all start from somewhere, and this fashion and style can be learned.
• 16:28
  SPEAKER_00: Because I myself am an example of that.
• 16:31
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_02: And it doesn't matter your age, right?
• 16:33
  SPEAKER_02: It doesn't matter.
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_00: It doesn't matter your age.
• 16:35
  SPEAKER_00: No, dark.
• 16:36
  SPEAKER_02: It's never never too late.
• 16:38
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I love that.
• 16:39
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that's that's really great.
• 16:41
  SPEAKER_02: Now, when you look back at your own journey, Sandy, what was standing like what did you have, you know, um, in your mind, what were you standing firm on?
• 16:53
  SPEAKER_02: What did it look like for you, right?
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_02: Was there a season when you had to trust yourself, use your voice, make a difficult decision that ultimately shaped the woman and business owner that you are today?
• 17:06
  SPEAKER_00: Well, um, you know, starting my own business, that was very uh difficult for me to first of all believe in myself that I could do something like this.
• 17:17
  SPEAKER_00: But I felt like I I had a message to bring to people.
• 17:21
  SPEAKER_00: You know, I wanted to help other people go through the same transformation I did, you know, because it's it's invaluable.
• 17:30
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, for someone to feel good about themselves and have confidence, it just gives me the most joy to help people with that, you know.
• 17:38
  SPEAKER_00: I love that.
• 17:39
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that's beautiful.
• 17:40
  SPEAKER_02: Did you always love clothes?
• 17:43
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, I did.
• 17:44
  SPEAKER_02: I did.
• 17:45
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 17:46
  SPEAKER_00: So you were just taking your natural love and making you like making it part of your business and yeah, but I didn't always know the right clothes because I used to wear all the wrong colors when I was in my 30s.
• 17:59
  SPEAKER_00: I used to wear all warm colors, the autumn colors.
• 18:03
  SPEAKER_00: That's just the opposite of what I should have been wearing.
• 18:06
  SPEAKER_02: Isn't that funny?
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, isn't that funny?
• 18:08
  SPEAKER_02: And so when you think about that, when you when you think back to those years, what did you like?
• 18:13
  SPEAKER_02: What do you think you like made?
• 18:15
  SPEAKER_02: Did you wear them because you liked them or you wore them because you thought that's what looked good on you?
• 18:22
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, no, I didn't wear them because I thought they looked good on me.
• 18:25
  SPEAKER_00: I thought if it was the autumn season, like in October, November, that those were the colors that were, you know.
• 18:34
  SPEAKER_00: So I said, oh yeah, it's fall time.
• 18:37
  SPEAKER_00: I need to wear orange and rust and mustard yellow.
• 18:43
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, isn't that funny?
• 18:44
  SPEAKER_02: Well, I mean, why if you if nobody tells you, how are you supposed to know?
• 18:48
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, and I had curly hair.
• 18:49
  SPEAKER_00: I had I I used to get perms every what three months.
• 18:53
  SPEAKER_00: I had curly hair out to here, which didn't help my my full round face.
• 18:59
  SPEAKER_00: So I made live and learn.
• 19:04
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, we do, we do.
• 19:06
  unknown: Yes.
• 19:07
  SPEAKER_02: I love it.
• 19:07
  SPEAKER_02: I love that.
• 19:09
  SPEAKER_02: So if when I ask you what does confidence and bloom mean to you, what is your answer?
• 19:15
  SPEAKER_00: Well, confidence and bloom means that, you know, everyone is at a different stage in life, and your conf your confidence doesn't come out all at once.
• 19:28
  SPEAKER_00: It's like you said, bloom.
• 19:30
  SPEAKER_00: It's coming slowly.
• 19:32
  SPEAKER_00: We're all at different stages because I'm still at a, you know, maybe I'm a little further than some people, but I still, you know, lack confidence in something.
• 19:41
  SPEAKER_00: So I think we're all progressing towards confidence.
• 19:46
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 19:46
  SPEAKER_02: I love that.
• 19:47
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom and reminding us that confidence isn't about wearing that perfect outfit, but it's also allowing who we are on the inside to be reflected on the outside.
• 20:00
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 20:00
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you, Tina.
• 20:02
  SPEAKER_02: Yes, thank you.
• 20:03
  SPEAKER_02: To everyone listening, I hope today's conversation encourages you to take up a little more space, trust yourself a little more deeply, and remember that your voice begins long before you speak.
• 20:15
  SPEAKER_02: If something in today's conversation resonated with you and you're ready to move beyond self-doubt, overwhelm, or second-guessing yourself, I'd love to invite you to connect with me.
• 20:28
  SPEAKER_02: Through my coaching workshops and the Bloom Room community, I help women reconnect with themselves so they can move forward with greater clarity, confidence, and self-trust.
• 20:38
  SPEAKER_02: If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, share it with any someone who needs to hear it, and leave us a review.
• 20:46
  SPEAKER_02: It helps more women discover these conversations.
• 20:49
  SPEAKER_02: Until next time, remember, confidence isn't about becoming someone else.
• 20:54
  SPEAKER_02: It's about coming home to who you've always been.
• 20:57
  SPEAKER_02: We'll see you next time on Confidence in Bloom.
• 21:00
  SPEAKER_01: Thanks for listening.
• 21:02
  SPEAKER_01: This show was brought to you by Divas That Care.
• 21:04
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