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Staci Mckee | Testimonial | EP 120 · iRefresh Podcast

• 0:29
  I have come to an understanding that one of the most important things about my walk with the Lord is understanding my true identity in Jesus Christ. And so I have been on this journey starting in about 2015 of understanding who I am to God and who he is to me.
• 0:49
  So I lived for so long with a wrong idea of who God is. I was raised under the iron fist of religion. And I kind of saw God as a dictator. And I thought that all he wanted to do was to judge me. And I pictured him sitting up on this big throne and pointing his finger at me. And there was nothing that I could ever do to measure up. And so frankly, I just, I stopped trying. And I was raised in a very strong Christian home. My father was a pastor.
• 1:18
  And it wasn't until I was about 45 years old that I actually began to understand who God really wants to be in my life. And, you know, I went to church, but I had the Bible preached at me and not to me. I don't know if you know what that's like.
• 1:36
  And so I decided to pray and I asked the Lord, I'm a very visual person. And so I said, Lord, I need to know how it is that you want me to relate to you. Give me a picture of what our relationship looks like. And so one night he woke me up at his favorite time, it was 3 a.m.,
• 1:55
  And I could tell, you know, I had this vision that came into my head, and I grabbed my phone, and I just started writing because I knew this was going to be something that was life-changing. So when I was 45, I began this journey of revelation with the guidance of the Holy Spirit about the truth of the three. So I'll refer to the three, and here on out as I say the three, I'm talking about the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.
• 2:21
  So this was the visual that he gave me. Father, Son, and Holy Spirit have invited me to dine with them at this beautiful banquet table. I'm dressed in a beautiful white chiffon robe of righteousness. Of course, mine had a pink sparkly trim because, you know, God's personal. And so he knew that that was a little extra just for me.
• 2:47
  So the table is filled with everything that God has to offer. And I'm gonna give you a few things that God has to offer. But while I'm listing this, I want you to think of some things that God has to offer you as a child of God. So this table was full of his love, his joy, peace, and not the peace that the world gives, but his peace, patience, forgiveness,
• 3:17
  Mercy, redemption, freedom. These are just a few of the things that were laid out on this table. And there was so much more. God told me that what I see at the table is everything that I will ever need as a child of God. And it was never just one portion. This was heaping, it was overflowing. It was more than I could imagine. I would eat and I would eat, only wanting more of what they had to offer me.
• 3:45
  He even gave me a verse. The Bible says in Psalm 107, verse 9, that he satisfies the parched throat and he fills the hungry appetite with what is good.
• 3:57
  So as long as I stay at the table, which is new man behavior, so the Bible says in 2 Corinthians 5.17, that the old has passed away and all has become new. So when I became a Christian, everything about the old me died. And I was raised to life to live like Jesus Christ. So when I'm focused on who I am in Christ, I avoid the pitfalls and situations that get me stuck.
• 4:26
  I have an understanding that when I sit at the table, yesterday's plate has already been cleared. So that means I don't have to worry about what happened yesterday. And tomorrow's plate has not yet been set. So I don't have to worry or focus on tomorrow.
• 4:51
  I have no need to worry about my future. I refuse to worry about tomorrow, but I deal with each challenge that comes your way one day at a time. This is Matthew 6, 34. For tomorrow will take care of itself. My only job is to focus on today and staying at the table.
• 5:08
  But in this beautiful vision, I had another option that was pointed out to me. And I saw that there was a dumpster off in the corner with a dirty, ragged coat hanging over the side. And any time that I choose to get into my flesh, which is old man behavior, I physically have to get up from the table...
• 5:27
  I have to push my chair back, I stand up, I turn around, and I take those steps over to the dumpster. I put on the filthy rags, covering my beautiful chiffon robe, and I jump on in.
• 5:41
  And so when you say, and I just begin to eat, I begin to eat on those things that are offered in the dumpster. And when you say to someone, yeah, I like to eat out of the dumpster, well, that's ludicrous. Nobody wants to eat out of the dumpster. That's gross, that's disgusting. But I think the Lord gave me this visual that every time I am not walking in my new man, that is what I'm doing. So for example, if I choose to walk in fear in a situation,
• 6:07
  That's me pushing back from the table, walking over the dumpster, and taking out a big old plate of yesterday's cheeseburger and chewing on it. And that's fear. Because over at God's table, He's offering me perfect peace.
• 6:22
  So anytime, this is just a really good way for me to visualize, you know, okay, Stacy, what you're doing right now? Are you table living or are you dumpster diving? And okay, I'm, you know, and the nice thing is, is that every time my mind shifts from having the mind of Christ to focusing on my flesh, I'm choosing to eat out of the dumpster. But when I snap out of it and realize what I'm doing, I'm able to immediately return to where I belong.
• 6:48
  So I mentally take off those filthy rag, and once again, I sit at the table with the three. So this is what I refer to as table living, and it's where I live my best life. And I've asked a few other of my girlfriends to do the same thing, to pray about, you know,
• 7:06
  a visual that they could have, how they related to God. And so I've had several different friends that have prayed about this, and each one of my friends that have something like this, it has changed the way that they think about God, it has changed the way that they relate. I have a friend that she has a visual of a boat,
• 7:24
  And the sea around her is the old man and her old lifestyle. And the waves are crashing, you know, against the boat. And she keeps, you know, she's tempted to dive into the water, but Jesus is in the boat. And so she's supposed to stay in the boat. And so she, you know, everything to her is in reference to the boat. And then I have another girl and I was kind of
• 7:46
  jealous of her vision because like, ooh, that sounds nice. Hers was Island. We call her Island Girl. And God gave her this visual of being on this beautiful island. And on her island, she even has different places where God does different things for her. She has a hammock on the island. And that's where she lays in the hammock with Jesus when she's hurting and he comforts her.
• 8:08
  And then when he wants to teach her something, she moves over to the campfire and they have a time of teaching. And then when she needs nourishment, they move over to the table and that's where they have a time of nourishment. But they got the ocean and the ocean is that old man lifestyle. And sometimes, you know, you might have friends out in the ocean and they're calling help.
• 8:27
  I need help. I need help. And she told me the most profound thing one time. And she said, yes, I see my friends and they want to be on the island, but it's not my place to go out into the water to get them. It's my place to pray for them and ask them to see how Jesus can help them move to the island. So it's not my place to go jump into the dumpster to help a friend out, to teach them how to get to the table. I'm going to stay at the table and I'm going to stay at the table
• 8:54
  where I'm supposed to be and pray for my friends that are living in the dumpster, that God will show them the way that he showed me.
• 9:01
  So, and then he gave me, I was listening to a song called Fight My Battles. I don't know if you guys are familiar with that song. And then he gave me another visual with my table that I added on here to the end. And that was, he took the table and so everything on it is so beautifully set. And he turned the table over, but of course, you know, since it's heaven, nothing fell. Everything was still in place under the table. But on the other side of that table,
• 9:26
  It was a war map where generals strategize for battle. And it was the coolest scene of the Father, Son, and the Holy Spirit standing with me around the table, showing me and strategizing with me on how to stay out of the dumpster. It was a really cool scene. So I'm going to read this verse out of Revelation 3 and verse 20. And once I got this visual of the table, I started asking the Lord to,
• 9:53
  to show me some verses. And he gave me verse after verse after. I couldn't believe how many verses there was about the table in the Bible. And now I've seen devotional books and all these other things where people are referencing the table. And it was just total confirmation.
• 10:07
  So this is Revelation 3.20, and it says, Behold, I'm standing at the door, and I'm knocking. If your heart is open to hear my voice, and you open the door within, I will come into you and feast with you, and you will feast with me. So that's a promise that I can stand on, no matter what situation I am in in my life. My starting point for that situation is,
• 10:33
  is that when I open the door to Jesus, that He is going to come in and He is going to feast with me. And no matter what is going on, I don't have to jump in the dumpster. That's always a choice that I have to make. You know, I choose to jump in the dumpster. So I would just like to leave you ladies with the challenge of maybe praying and asking the Lord to give you a visual on how He relates to you. Because you know,
• 10:58
  God is not a cookie cutter God, and he relates to each one of us differently according to our own personalities, according to what's going on in our lives. And so he has something special, a way that he wants to relate to you. And so I would just like to leave you with a challenge of just praying and asking the Lord to give you a visual of how he wants to relate with you. So thank you for letting me share.