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DONKEY: Shake Shack Worker Robs Job At Gunpoint Then Returns To Work · The Breakfast Club

• 0:03
  Speaker 1: You are a donkey.
• 0:05
  Speaker 2: That is why Charlemagne is.
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: Some donkey. Today's just saw himself the breakfast club. Okay, Charlamage,
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: we've been giving a donkey of the day too.
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: It's the day, well donkey today for Wednesday, August twelve.
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: Cause the thirty three year old KeAndre Simmons.
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: I believe he's an Arizona man and he's a prime
• 0:21
  Speaker 2: example of why this generation is being labeled dumber than
• 0:25
  Speaker 2: previous generations. Okay, see, KeAndre was an employee of Shakeshack
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: and he woke up one day and he yawned, and
• 0:32
  Speaker 2: he brushed his teeth, and he ReLit a half of
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: pre roll from the night before. He probably ate a
• 0:37
  Speaker 2: pop tart or a bowl of cinnamon toast crunch, and
• 0:39
  Speaker 2: said in himself, you know what I'm gonna do today.
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna call him sick so I can rob my
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: place of employment. And after I robbed my place of employment,
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: I'm just gonna show up right back to the scene
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: of the crime and clock in like nothing happened. Oh Chat,
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: GPT can't make this kind of stuff up. Let's go
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: to w c A X three for the report.
• 0:58
  Speaker 3: Police Andre Simmons is accused of robbery an inside job.
• 1:03
  Speaker 3: He faces charges of armed robbery, aggravated assault, and kidnapping.
• 1:08
  Speaker 3: According to these court documents, Simmons called out of work
• 1:11
  Speaker 3: at the Shake Shack at Kierln Commons around midnight on
• 1:15
  Speaker 3: August third, but showed up later that morning wearing a
• 1:19
  Speaker 3: disguise and a black face mask. An employee told police
• 1:23
  Speaker 3: he heard the delivery bell at the back of the
• 1:26
  Speaker 3: store and opened up, standing there was a masked man
• 1:29
  Speaker 3: pointing a gun. Simmons allegedly forced the employee into the
• 1:33
  Speaker 3: walk in cooler, locking it using a latch that only
• 1:36
  Speaker 3: employees would know. Simmons then ordered the manager to hand
• 1:40
  Speaker 3: over about twenty eight hundred bucks in cash, and after
• 1:43
  Speaker 3: he got the money, Simmons reportedly locked the manager and
• 1:46
  Speaker 3: the cooler too. Records say in those moments, the employees
• 1:50
  Speaker 3: tried to make a run for it, but Simmons came back,
• 1:53
  Speaker 3: threatening them with the gun for a second time, rushing
• 1:57
  Speaker 3: those employees into the office, destroying their phones, and then
• 2:00
  Speaker 3: taking off queerl insecurity and the employees led police to
• 2:04
  Speaker 3: Simmons two days later.
• 2:07
  Speaker 2: You know, Caandre, you can't commit an inside job when
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: everybody knows you're the insider. Okay, I know the mindset
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: he was in, He said, If I come back to work,
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: nobody will suspect this me, because why would anybody who
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: just robbed the place come back to the place they
• 2:24
  Speaker 2: just robbed? KeAndre, your logic makes sense, But I need
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: us to understand there are a lot of Caandras out here,
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: and they are banking on us being just as stupid
• 2:34
  Speaker 2: as them. Okay, KeAndre, you thought this through, but you
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: didn't question your own thinking. Okay.
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: Thinking about your own thinking is called meta cognition. Okay.
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: Psychologists and neuroscientists.
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: View it as a peak form of intelligence because it
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: allows you to step back, watch your mind work, and
• 2:50
  Speaker 2: catch your own biases and mistakes in real time. Caandre,
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: you didn't catch none of your mistakes. Okay, you called
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: in sick before your shift. All right, imagine the police investigation.
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: Anybody missing from work today? Yeah, Keandra, who we all knew?
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: We all know who it was, he called out. Okay,
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: book them all right. I mean his coworkers recognized him.
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: Through the disguise, the employee said, because of his build,
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: his voice, his mannerisms, and his hairline. They literally said hairline.
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: Now I saw, I saw his mug shot. Let me
• 3:24
  Speaker 2: pull his mug shot up for you. Hold on, I
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: should have had it out already. God damn, it is
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: his mug shot. Send me his mugshot, Eddie. I can't
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: find it now, but his mug shot. Oh no, that's
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: not her.
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: Up now.
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: If you notice, look at his mug shot. Okay, his
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: hairline isn't pushed back.
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: Okay. In fact, he's got all his edges.
• 3:52
  Speaker 2: And I think people who are blessed to still have
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: all their edges tend to forget that that that that
• 3:57
  Speaker 2: is uh, you know, it's more recognizable.
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: Okay, when you have all your edges, then it is
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: when it's receding. Okay.
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: Because as a man, I see people with hairlines, and
• 4:05
  Speaker 2: I think to myself, hold on to that for as
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: long as you can, young man, because at some point,
• 4:09
  Speaker 2: your hairlines starts dancing to Fat Joe's lean back, and
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: there's nothing you can do about it.
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 4:14
  Speaker 2: Also, why the hell didn't you have on a mask
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: that covers your whole head? Okay, your face was undercover,
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: but your hairline was cooperating with authorities. Not to mention
• 4:23
  Speaker 2: he knew the layout of the restaurant employee said he
• 4:27
  Speaker 2: knew too much. He knew employee only areas, he knew
• 4:30
  Speaker 2: where equipment was kept, he knew how to walk in
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: coolest outside latchwork. That's clearly somebody who completed Shakeshack orientation. Okay,
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: then on top of all of that, you came back
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: to work two days later. No metacognition went into this crime. Okay,
• 4:45
  Speaker 2: he didn't think about his own thinking at all. He
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: didn't do his jail map either. Okay, y'all know what
• 4:51
  Speaker 2: jail map is when you try to add up if
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: you can afford to do what it is you're about
• 4:55
  Speaker 2: to do. Court documentary portedly say KeAndre was struggling and
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: had children.
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: Well, who's going to support those kids? Now?
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: Okay, you committed an armed robbery for twenty eight hundred dollars.
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: You don't have money for bond.
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: Okay, you don't have money for an attorney, and now
• 5:09
  Speaker 2: you're going to spend at least a decade in prison.
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: Once again, who is going to support those children?
• 5:15
  Speaker 3: Now?
• 5:15
  Speaker 2: Okay, you can't afford to do anything that you did, Keandra. Okay,
• 5:21
  Speaker 2: desperation could make you irrational, but desperation doesn't make consequences disappear,
• 5:26
  Speaker 2: all right. If you're struggling financially and have children depending
• 5:29
  Speaker 2: on you, an armed robbery, accravated assault charge and kidnapping
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: charges aren't going to improve your situation. In fact, it's
• 5:37
  Speaker 2: going to make your financial situation worse because now you're
• 5:40
  Speaker 2: being held on one hundred thousand dollars bond. Okay, KeAndre
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: allegedly committed the worst kind of inside job, the kind
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: where everybody inside knows exactly who you are. Please give
• 5:54
  Speaker 2: KeAndre Simmons the biggesty hull.
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: Think this through.
• 6:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah, all right, well, thank you for that.
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: Donkey to Day.
• 6:07
  Speaker 2: Donkey of Today is sponsored by renowned personal injury attorney
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: Michael the Bull Lamb is soft.
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: Don't be a donkey when you need a fighter on
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: your side. If you're ever injured, go to Michael to
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: bull dot com. That's Michael to bull dot com. And
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: when you mess with the bull, you get the horns